Hey Adya. I used to listen to u a few years ago. Yesterday I had a realization that I can't control thought. I "said" well I've tried everything and can't control or stop thought so fine, let's have it! I can't believe that by giving thought attention(like giving a kid attention) there is no problem. Then ironically, this morning I discovered your dialogue with a guy about how he can control his thought and you said basically this. It's ironic that I discovered that video after i discovered the truth for myself. But I guess it's better to see it for yourself first lol. Enjoy!
The Shout, he describes it so well. This is not interesting, rather unsettling. Desires for friendships fall away, as a matter of fact , it becomes impossible to maintain normal friendships. It also becomes impossible to have the same conversations as before with your spiritual friends, as that seems like a false identity too. Life becomes like a limbo state. I have been wondering what is going on. What happened to those giddy insights, joyful experiences, etc. Did I lose the whole plot? Then this video appears and Adya describes yet again what so few teachers talk about. My point is to enjoy what you are going through. Getting to this "point" is not that great :)
Hanle de Beer, Enjoying also seems suffering though. Of course it can occur very unbalanced in praxis. If it's mostly just suffering, exiting that whole dynamic seems tempting. When you say it becomes impossible to maintain normal friendships and that the desire for it falls away, I wonder what you mean by "normal". Maybe you mean something that is unhealthy (which could indeed be considered the norm in this world). I tend to say that true friendship is nothing personal, because what I see all the time and what depresses me is when friendship is treated merely as having allies in a war against a hostile world. While that can be very empowering and feel good when you have such support, it is still serving fear. I perceive true friendship as practiced love for the concept of friendship itself, basically worship. It IS love. And the 'normal' type of friendship seems selfish and deceptive to me, and that makes it difficult to trust. Such a 'friendship' relationship would have a saddened effect on me, since it is all the time affirming the misery that drives one towards such an alliance of mutual benefit. In order to be able to accept such weakness in a peer, one needs some source of strength.
Maybe this can help: How do you fall asleep? ... Just lay down on your bed and do nothing, allowing yourself to not hold on to the waking state. The difference in difficulty of course being that you have confidence it'll be fine, based on not only your own, but everybody's past experience. In the case of letting go of the self, you have no own experience to rely on, so no confidence, only faith based on almost anecdotal reports. Can you trust something you have to reason to trust? ... Sure. Happens all the time, usually fueled by a yearning for experiencing a world where trust can be justified. But trust with your (supposed) life? That might be tough, especially if you have had your trust betrayed before.
![Existential Terror and Loss of Self [Trigger Warning!!]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/OD_bBy0nxLI/mqdefault.jpg)
"All you have to do is allow it to happen"
"Watch yourself feeling miserable and do nothing about it." Robert Adams
I love you Adya. You've been a light throughout my journey. I am.
Thank you. ❤️🙏
Exactly, that's maddening! 😮
Hey Adya. I used to listen to u a few years ago. Yesterday I had a realization that I can't control thought. I "said" well I've tried everything and can't control or stop thought so fine, let's have it! I can't believe that by giving thought attention(like giving a kid attention) there is no problem. Then ironically, this morning I discovered your dialogue with a guy about how he can control his thought and you said basically this. It's ironic that I discovered that video after i discovered the truth for myself. But I guess it's better to see it for yourself first lol. Enjoy!
People, like me, start to cling to insights and spiritual awakening as an ego identity. I wonder if I will get to this point
I and me become no-thing. Like apple falling from tree, it happens at right moment. No attachment to enlightenment, no concern. 🙃
The Shout, he describes it so well. This is not interesting, rather unsettling. Desires for friendships fall away, as a matter of fact , it becomes impossible to maintain normal friendships. It also becomes impossible to have the same conversations as before with your spiritual friends, as that seems like a false identity too. Life becomes like a limbo state.
I have been wondering what is going on. What happened to those giddy insights, joyful experiences, etc. Did I lose the whole plot? Then this video appears and Adya describes yet again what so few teachers talk about.
My point is to enjoy what you are going through. Getting to this "point" is not that great :)
Hanle de Beer, Enjoying also seems suffering though. Of course it can occur very unbalanced in praxis. If it's mostly just suffering, exiting that whole dynamic seems tempting.
When you say it becomes impossible to maintain normal friendships and that the desire for it falls away, I wonder what you mean by "normal". Maybe you mean something that is unhealthy (which could indeed be considered the norm in this world). I tend to say that true friendship is nothing personal, because what I see all the time and what depresses me is when friendship is treated merely as having allies in a war against a hostile world. While that can be very empowering and feel good when you have such support, it is still serving fear. I perceive true friendship as practiced love for the concept of friendship itself, basically worship. It IS love. And the 'normal' type of friendship seems selfish and deceptive to me, and that makes it difficult to trust. Such a 'friendship' relationship would have a saddened effect on me, since it is all the time affirming the misery that drives one towards such an alliance of mutual benefit. In order to be able to accept such weakness in a peer, one needs some source of strength.
This happens every full moon for me as well 🌕 🐺 🐶
Maybe this can help: How do you fall asleep? ... Just lay down on your bed and do nothing, allowing yourself to not hold on to the waking state. The difference in difficulty of course being that you have confidence it'll be fine, based on not only your own, but everybody's past experience. In the case of letting go of the self, you have no own experience to rely on, so no confidence, only faith based on almost anecdotal reports.
Can you trust something you have to reason to trust? ... Sure. Happens all the time, usually fueled by a yearning for experiencing a world where trust can be justified. But trust with your (supposed) life? That might be tough, especially if you have had your trust betrayed before.
But as you/we dont exist , how can we let it happen?
🙏Thank you
❤️