“if she never woke up, i think apart of me would be relieved.” is what really gets me, i can understand why she feels that why, it’s absolutely heartbreaking to say out loud or to think it at all. it’s something you don’t wanna think or say but you just can’t help yourself from feeling that way.
Yes!! I just heard someone talking the other day about grieving the loss of someone/something but also feeling a sense of relief from it, but not shaming yourself for feeling or needing that relief bc things, people, situations could have carried such heaviness in their living days that it was borderline burdensome if not fully!! Quick example being ppl who’ve suffered abuse from someone they love (parent, lover, etc)…and said person passes away, there could be a grief bc you did have love for that person or whatever connection you may have felt but you are now freed from the abuse…the emotions can go hand in hand quite easily, and can get very very confusing !!
It's not about wanting that person to be gone, but not wanting to be constantly worrying they're going to go. When they're gone you're no longer worrying if they're ok, if they're still alive, and that's a normal feeling.
My sister chose our abusers and is now mad at me that I won't step in on her behalf to save her from there abuse. Any time I didn't agree with her she would scream I hated it, that I was jealous, that I wanted to see her fail. It was never true. I was never jealous and I tried for years to help her. I helped her out of countless bad situations she put herself in. But then I had kids and I had to make a choice, her or them. It was no contest. I will do whatever I need to in order to keep my kids safe and that means I can't have my sister in my life. I blamed myself. She has a kid who is in the same crappy situation. If I could save if I would. Unfortunately, my sister wants me to take the place of scapegoat again. She doesn't want to leave them or at least, she won't. She is too afraid and I can't give her the security. Last time I tried it bite me. So I am done. It never stops hurting. I love her and always felt responsible for her even though I am the younger sister. I wanted her to get mentally better and take a stand for herself and her child and she couldn't. She couldn't do it when I was there to help and so I doubt she will ever do it, no matter how much it hurts to say it. I am sure she thinks I don't deserve an apology and that I am being selfish and stubborn. Sometimes you have to walk away. It never stops hurting, but it hurts less than being around her.
A traumatized, mentally wounded woman going through heroin withdrawals. It’s not uncommon for an addict to lash out and say/do very hurtful things when they first start detoxing. The disease really warps their brains.
I heard a good line from a movie: "I can't save you without saving myself." Vanessa may blame Lauren all she wants, but 1) Vanessa also had choices she could've made 2) Lauren would've come back for her 3) They were all in their teens, all young. Lauren feels tied because "you don't turn your back on family," but sometimes it reaches a point where yes you have too. It's heartbreaking but it sometimes has to happen.
@@FullTimePatient37 doesn't matter. I've watched many shows with this kind of scenario and every time the patient ends up dying, the patient ends up having their LVAD cut, they end of dying during surgery.
Lauren left an abusive situation. That’s NOT selfish. Her sister can blame her for leaving all she wants, but the fact is that they only have hope now b/c she chose to get out. Vanessa didn’t have to go down the same destructive path as her mother. She could’ve chosen to be better like Lauren. Instead, she continued the cycle, & became just as toxic an influence as her mother. Maybe one day she’ll be sober, but she has to choose that for herself. Even then, Lauren doesn’t owe her anything. If Vanessa wants her sister back in her life, it’ll have to be on Lauren’s terms.
@@HananSaleh-y7l Absolutely. Removing yourself from a toxic environment or influence is incredibly challenging - making the effort to be different than what that aspect was making you is even harder.
@@HananSaleh-y7lwell it was definitely a lot easier before Vanessa got addicted to drugs herself. Now that she's an addict that's a whole other battle. Still difficult to break the family cycle, but a lot easier to do if you haven't already becom an addict.
Lauren could have called social services and gotten Vanessa outta that same toxic environment she was in but she didn't. Yes, Vanessa could have made better choices but Stop making Lauren sound like her hands are clean when they're not! An older sibling is suppose to protect their younger sibling, be a second parent but Lauren wasn't that, even if she couldn't take Vanessa with her when she left. She could still have gotten her away from their toxic mother!
Unfortunately I’ve had to do this with some of my family. I don’t let them in anymore because their drama and addictions will only stop me from getting to where I want to be in life. I want to lead a healthy and successful life and I can’t do that with them in it. And I can’t save them because at this point they don’t want it.
Doctors shouldn’t be treating family. There’s to many feelings involved that can get in the way of proper treatment and things can go easily missed. This is prime example of that.
When they initially rolled her sister through the door, it makes sense bc her sister needed immediate life saving and she was there. It looked like all doctors in the vicinity were either with patients or helping her so if the option is treat your family or watch them die, no doctors chosing the later. And it seemed like when she came in the room to talk to her sister that's the only reason. To talk and visit her. Then again, sister falls to the floor, she's the only person in the room period until help comes, and then other doctors pick her sister up and take her away. Which tells me she wasn't part of her sister's care bc otherwise she'd have gone with them.
Lifeguards are taught NOT to fight with a drowning person. They wait for them to grow tired so they don't kill themself and the lifeguard. You CANNOT save another person at the cost of yourself. What her sister is demanding is what's selfish...
That’s not true lifeguards are taught to get the drowning patient out of the water before they pass out or take on too much water. I’ve been life guarding for 25 years. It’s still alot harder to revive a patient than to rescue them
Opioid overdose is easy to treat, but stimulant toxicity is tough. There’s nothing like Narcan, it’s all supportive therapy and hoping they pull through.
As long as Lauren was there at the end of it, her sister would continue to blame her or use it to punish her for leaving. When it comes to addicts, they have to be willing to catch themself.
For one thing this had nothing to do with treating her she did that just fine she’s family and she was visiting her sister and they argued this wasn’t anything to do with her treating her or being involved she can visit family
Did they cancel the show on tv? I haven’t seen new episodes! One thing is I don’t like is when they cancel tv shows when I just start getting into them!
I swear, why don't doctors in these shows stop working on family? Every show I watch the doctor's family always seem to die or their condition gets worse. Just stop.
And when the narcissistic parents puts all the abuse on you but your damaged yet not narcissistic. Ppl have no right don't blame ppl for getting out. The only reason why they talk about "genetics" in regards to drug use IS because of the environment and the personality traits they were TAUGHT. Which in all honestly is not actually genetic. It's monkey see monkey do.
Her sister PUT herself in that situation....what he said is 100% the truth. She left and because of it she was ABLE TO HELP her. 50% got out. Whether she made it or not that's the important thing. You do ALL u can until u can't anymore
Drug use was the sister's choice. The three Cs of addiction in another person--you didn't Cause it, you can't Control it, and you can't Cure it. The addict has to commit themselves to sobriety.
Why did they have to end the show so abruptly? Vanessa running in saying “she kicked the bucket” was just SO STUPID! Who decided to end the series? It ended so abruptly and there were so many loose ends that they had to forcefully tie up so quickly. The story arcs with the character weren’t even close to done.
You know that usually it's the network the one that decides to cancel a show, right? And no they don't care in the slightest about cliffhangers or loose ends, they only exclusively care about money.
Whats pathetic is the sister saying she was worried "about you throwing it in your face". Na thats shows pure egotism, worried about her own feelings about being judged when the girl got out amd made something of herself. Sorry she neither the mother gets to play the victim or blame game.
Where is the fu... g... Sound...????? .... 🥴 🤔 🙄 🙉🤭 🤨 🤑 🤑 🧟♀️ 🧟♀️ 💀 ☠️ ... 😮 .... Has the sound gone for a walk.... 🚶 🚶 👣 ???? ...... Or is this a silent..... 🤫 🤐 😶 ... video... ???? ...
guhhh... painfully bad writing, painfully unrealistic choice to have her treat her own sister when the storyline could have been completely the same without it... appreciate that it showed her mascara running though!
Anyone reading that comment. IGNORE IT. Put you first, take care of you. Family can be just as bad or worse than strangers and they’ll drag you down. Don’t do it to yourself.
Deeper obligations require high standards. If the the other party fails in those standards, the obligations are rendered null. It cuts both ways, but you only want to put the emphasis on the obligation side.
“if she never woke up, i think apart of me would be relieved.” is what really gets me, i can understand why she feels that why, it’s absolutely heartbreaking to say out loud or to think it at all. it’s something you don’t wanna think or say but you just can’t help yourself from feeling that way.
Yes!! I just heard someone talking the other day about grieving the loss of someone/something but also feeling a sense of relief from it, but not shaming yourself for feeling or needing that relief bc things, people, situations could have carried such heaviness in their living days that it was borderline burdensome if not fully!! Quick example being ppl who’ve suffered abuse from someone they love (parent, lover, etc)…and said person passes away, there could be a grief bc you did have love for that person or whatever connection you may have felt but you are now freed from the abuse…the emotions can go hand in hand quite easily, and can get very very confusing !!
It's not about wanting that person to be gone, but not wanting to be constantly worrying they're going to go. When they're gone you're no longer worrying if they're ok, if they're still alive, and that's a normal feeling.
My sister had addiction issues, we lost her. There’s an odd peace knowing her struggles are over. I miss her but she’s at peace.
Janet’s acting skills honestly shock me every time I see her. That and how convincing her American accent is most of the time 😂
who tells their big sister that they don't deserve an apology from their own mom
An abused, heartbroken woman addicted to drugs that change a person’s life and their mind until they can’t recognize themselves anymore.
My sister chose our abusers and is now mad at me that I won't step in on her behalf to save her from there abuse. Any time I didn't agree with her she would scream I hated it, that I was jealous, that I wanted to see her fail. It was never true. I was never jealous and I tried for years to help her. I helped her out of countless bad situations she put herself in. But then I had kids and I had to make a choice, her or them. It was no contest. I will do whatever I need to in order to keep my kids safe and that means I can't have my sister in my life.
I blamed myself. She has a kid who is in the same crappy situation. If I could save if I would. Unfortunately, my sister wants me to take the place of scapegoat again. She doesn't want to leave them or at least, she won't. She is too afraid and I can't give her the security. Last time I tried it bite me. So I am done.
It never stops hurting. I love her and always felt responsible for her even though I am the younger sister. I wanted her to get mentally better and take a stand for herself and her child and she couldn't. She couldn't do it when I was there to help and so I doubt she will ever do it, no matter how much it hurts to say it. I am sure she thinks I don't deserve an apology and that I am being selfish and stubborn. Sometimes you have to walk away. It never stops hurting, but it hurts less than being around her.
What about Vanessa! Don't you think she deserved an apology too? Seems Lauren is always the center of attention and Vanessa is always second to non!
A traumatized, mentally wounded woman going through heroin withdrawals. It’s not uncommon for an addict to lash out and say/do very hurtful things when they first start detoxing. The disease really warps their brains.
I heard a good line from a movie: "I can't save you without saving myself." Vanessa may blame Lauren all she wants, but
1) Vanessa also had choices she could've made
2) Lauren would've come back for her
3) They were all in their teens, all young.
Lauren feels tied because "you don't turn your back on family," but sometimes it reaches a point where yes you have too. It's heartbreaking but it sometimes has to happen.
Should she not be involved with this case given the potential of being emotionally-compromised and conflict of interest?
In greys anatomy they wouldn’t allow her
Yes but it's not an urgent surgery
that's the point the fictional tv show is making.
@@FullTimePatient37 doesn't matter. I've watched many shows with this kind of scenario and every time the patient ends up dying, the patient ends up having their LVAD cut, they end of dying during surgery.
Absolutely. Doctors really shouldn’t be treating family especially immediate. To many feelings involved
Lauren left an abusive situation. That’s NOT selfish. Her sister can blame her for leaving all she wants, but the fact is that they only have hope now b/c she chose to get out. Vanessa didn’t have to go down the same destructive path as her mother. She could’ve chosen to be better like Lauren. Instead, she continued the cycle, & became just as toxic an influence as her mother.
Maybe one day she’ll be sober, but she has to choose that for herself. Even then, Lauren doesn’t owe her anything. If Vanessa wants her sister back in her life, it’ll have to be on Lauren’s terms.
True
easier said than done
@@HananSaleh-y7l Absolutely. Removing yourself from a toxic environment or influence is incredibly challenging - making the effort to be different than what that aspect was making you is even harder.
@@HananSaleh-y7lwell it was definitely a lot easier before Vanessa got addicted to drugs herself. Now that she's an addict that's a whole other battle. Still difficult to break the family cycle, but a lot easier to do if you haven't already becom an addict.
Lauren could have called social services and gotten Vanessa outta that same toxic environment she was in but she didn't. Yes, Vanessa could have made better choices but Stop making Lauren sound like her hands are clean when they're not! An older sibling is suppose to protect their younger sibling, be a second parent but Lauren wasn't that, even if she couldn't take Vanessa with her when she left. She could still have gotten her away from their toxic mother!
It's difficult, you can't just walk away...its difficult
Very
I love New Amsterdam holeheartedly especially Lauren she is my best❤❤❤
Unfortunately I’ve had to do this with some of my family. I don’t let them in anymore because their drama and addictions will only stop me from getting to where I want to be in life. I want to lead a healthy and successful life and I can’t do that with them in it. And I can’t save them because at this point they don’t want it.
Doctors shouldn’t be treating family. There’s to many feelings involved that can get in the way of proper treatment and things can go easily missed. This is prime example of that.
It's their jobs to treat everyone no matter who it is.
@@annemariewood-orourke5994but ash she mentioned she didn’t see an obvious symptom of a diagnosis because of their past
@@annemariewood-orourke5994 that depends on the hospital and county, but doctors normally are not allowed to treat family
She wasn’t acting as a doctor, she was basically a visitor.
When they initially rolled her sister through the door, it makes sense bc her sister needed immediate life saving and she was there. It looked like all doctors in the vicinity were either with patients or helping her so if the option is treat your family or watch them die, no doctors chosing the later. And it seemed like when she came in the room to talk to her sister that's the only reason. To talk and visit her. Then again, sister falls to the floor, she's the only person in the room period until help comes, and then other doctors pick her sister up and take her away. Which tells me she wasn't part of her sister's care bc otherwise she'd have gone with them.
Lifeguards are taught NOT to fight with a drowning person. They wait for them to grow tired so they don't kill themself and the lifeguard. You CANNOT save another person at the cost of yourself. What her sister is demanding is what's selfish...
That’s not true lifeguards are taught to get the drowning patient out of the water before they pass out or take on too much water. I’ve been life guarding for 25 years. It’s still alot harder to revive a patient than to rescue them
@@eustacelongbottom9672 but if the victim starts attacking us we're supposed to escape/get away from them and start the rescue process over
That ending...💕
Addicts are the most difficult to help. No one.can help them unless they make the effort to help themselves first.
Opioid overdose is easy to treat, but stimulant toxicity is tough. There’s nothing like Narcan, it’s all supportive therapy and hoping they pull through.
As long as Lauren was there at the end of it, her sister would continue to blame her or use it to punish her for leaving. When it comes to addicts, they have to be willing to catch themself.
0:44 omg worst nightmare 😢
You cant save others unless youre on solid ground yourself. Also dont do drugs. Just ... dont.
What episode is this
In real life the second the doctor said her name they wouldve asked if she knows her and wouldve be taken off the case.
For one thing this had nothing to do with treating her she did that just fine she’s family and she was visiting her sister and they argued this wasn’t anything to do with her treating her or being involved she can visit family
Did they cancel the show on tv? I haven’t seen new episodes! One thing is I don’t like is when they cancel tv shows when I just start getting into them!
Yes
I only watched first season
2:58 she dropped like someone shot her dead, lol
I swear, why don't doctors in these shows stop working on family? Every show I watch the doctor's family always seem to die or their condition gets worse. Just stop.
good drama.
because if you were a doctor you would ty and do anything and everything to save them, I would know given I lost my brother
@@sandyveurink6102 That's not a valid reason by ethical standards though.
It's Mary Sibley from Salem!!!
The best show
My Sisters Keeper.
Very interesting
At that point I wouldn't even bother. Family or no, if someone said that to me, not my problem.
Kathryn Prescott from skins !!!!!!!
Vanessa or Janet Montgomery?
@@eprimeify2090 vanessa
It’s Katie F***ing Finch.
@@wholesom3515Oh, wow. She’s English, too.
Lol she’s carter from finding carter on MTV too!! It’s so underrated
Episode And season
5x10
I wouldn't care if my sister hater my narcissistic mother....i would understand 😢
And when the narcissistic parents puts all the abuse on you but your damaged yet not narcissistic. Ppl have no right don't blame ppl for getting out. The only reason why they talk about "genetics" in regards to drug use IS because of the environment and the personality traits they were TAUGHT. Which in all honestly is not actually genetic. It's monkey see monkey do.
What episode and season is this?
The best show but not the finale
Technically if she walks away she wouldn't be watching her die.
That was really weird writing.
sheesh, I guess one way to get clean is go to 26 meetings a week!
mate that's Emily from Skins!
Finding carter!
8:56 why is she asking for her sister now after she yelled at her
Her sister PUT herself in that situation....what he said is 100% the truth. She left and because of it she was ABLE TO HELP her. 50% got out. Whether she made it or not that's the important thing. You do ALL u can until u can't anymore
I Love New amsterdam hispital
😢❤
This is going against the rules you're not to work on family. It doesn't matter that they're in the ER.
They look identical
Drug use was the sister's choice. The three Cs of addiction in another person--you didn't Cause it, you can't Control it, and you can't Cure it. The addict has to commit themselves to sobriety.
Why did they have to end the show so abruptly? Vanessa running in saying “she kicked the bucket” was just SO STUPID!
Who decided to end the series? It ended so abruptly and there were so many loose ends that they had to forcefully tie up so quickly.
The story arcs with the character weren’t even close to done.
You know that usually it's the network the one that decides to cancel a show, right? And no they don't care in the slightest about cliffhangers or loose ends, they only exclusively care about money.
I'm happy it ended, it was very bad.
Podia colocar português
Ghost of the best friend now now but I have a
Hard to believe that these two actresses are English.
how is this a narcotics overdose? are they sure they didnt mean to say opioids overdose?
Opioids are narcotics.
An opioid is a narcotic, last time I checked?
Opioids are narcotics lmao.
I was rooting for Bloom & Reynold but they just never happened 😢 instead they brought together Sharpe & Goodwin , who's got 0 chemistry
Whats pathetic is the sister saying she was worried "about you throwing it in your face". Na thats shows pure egotism, worried about her own feelings about being judged when the girl got out amd made something of herself. Sorry she neither the mother gets to play the victim or blame game.
Where is the fu... g... Sound...????? .... 🥴 🤔 🙄 🙉🤭 🤨 🤑 🤑 🧟♀️ 🧟♀️ 💀 ☠️ ... 😮 .... Has the sound gone for a walk.... 🚶 🚶 👣 ???? ...... Or is this a silent..... 🤫 🤐 😶 ... video... ???? ...
GIO ninja chips 🥷🏽🥷🏽
Power 🏀🏈🎮⚾🎮⚾🎮
R5
First!!!
guhhh... painfully bad writing, painfully unrealistic choice to have her treat her own sister when the storyline could have been completely the same without it... appreciate that it showed her mascara running though!
Gawd these episodes are pathetic.
This show is so bad it makes me laugh.
The profanity and blasphemy is too much
OH SHUT UP.
Wtf lmao ok
Who asked lol
shes family, you don't turn your back on family
Anyone reading that comment. IGNORE IT.
Put you first, take care of you. Family can be just as bad or worse than strangers and they’ll drag you down. Don’t do it to yourself.
Deeper obligations require high standards. If the the other party fails in those standards, the obligations are rendered null. It cuts both ways, but you only want to put the emphasis on the obligation side.
The thing is ppl Lauren WAS affected and addicted to PILLS at one and that is extremely extremely hard, harder than cocaine