A lot of information in a succinct delivery, so bravo for that. And I really wish I’d heard of the dichotomy between spontaneous and responsive desire 20 years ago. But, and yep, there’s always a but…that bit about sex not having any “homeostatic relevance,” that it’s merely an “incentivized desire,” sounds like it’s coming from a person not living under the oppressive regime of masculine gonads, which constantly poison the well with testosterone. That remarkably effective little hormone makes sex very much a drive for men, and an annoying interruption for our wives. Jesting aside, orgasms have significant metabolic advantages. They lower blood pressure, reduce cortisol levels, relieve stress, induce better sleep cycles, and make both genders decidedly less crabby.
I was wondering if my sex drive was low. I don't get turned on by anything anymore. I'm wondering if its a psychological thing. But its nice to know that I don't have to be turned on so often. :)
I have a question. So I'm gray ace and when I look at something lewdy or sometimes an atractive person my body feels aroused but I don't want sex, so it makes me very uncomfortable.
I rarely feel arousal, either bodily or mentally. This pisses me off so much because it's ruining my sex life and I really want to enjoy sex with my boyfriend who is the most beautiful guy I've ever seen, do you think the book you talked about might help me?
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I thought this sounded a lot like Come as You Are, and then you recommended it! :D I didn't know she'd done a TED talk, so thanks for linking that.
my sexual desire and my genital response don't match up most of the time. nice to hear that's not weird and I wish the ideas were separated!
this was really helpful, I have trouble with my "red light" going off and getting in the way. this is due to anxiety and past experience. xo
Fantastic video, really informative and concise. Will definitely be checking out the book!
A lot of information in a succinct delivery, so bravo for that. And I really wish I’d heard of the dichotomy between spontaneous and responsive desire 20 years ago. But, and yep, there’s always a but…that bit about sex not having any “homeostatic relevance,” that it’s merely an “incentivized desire,” sounds like it’s coming from a person not living under the oppressive regime of masculine gonads, which constantly poison the well with testosterone. That remarkably effective little hormone makes sex very much a drive for men, and an annoying interruption for our wives.
Jesting aside, orgasms have significant metabolic advantages. They lower blood pressure, reduce cortisol levels, relieve stress, induce better sleep cycles, and make both genders decidedly less crabby.
Great video. I spent so much time wondering/worrying/unhappy with this stuff.
You are so funny and helpful, thank you! Being your friend would be a privilege.
😂
Thought this was a really great video - very interesting, well explained :)
ah! love this! esp the point about sexuality not being a drive. such an important point to make!
Thank you so much for this video!!! It helped me a lot!
I was wondering if my sex drive was low. I don't get turned on by anything anymore. I'm wondering if its a psychological thing. But its nice to know that I don't have to be turned on so often. :)
Thanks, I really learned alot from your video
You are awesome Erika, really awesome.
Hi Erika， I have a question.
I have a question. So I'm gray ace and when I look at something lewdy or sometimes an atractive person my body feels aroused but I don't want sex, so it makes me very uncomfortable.
I sometimes think that its cus I already get uncomfortable when I see it and that my brain mistakes it for me wanting an arousal
idk
ok so I'm not weird haha
I rarely feel arousal, either bodily or mentally. This pisses me off so much because it's ruining my sex life and I really want to enjoy sex with my boyfriend who is the most beautiful guy I've ever seen, do you think the book you talked about might help me?