5 CRITICAL QUESTIONS TO ASK BEFORE GETTING MARRIED w/ GUEST RAY MURRAY (EP. 58)

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ต.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 227

  • @RenewingHer
    @RenewingHer 2 ปีที่แล้ว +107

    This is the best conversation about marriage I’ve ever encountered. Seriously.

  • @laclairelcyy007
    @laclairelcyy007 2 ปีที่แล้ว +91

    “Someone without direction, cannot lead someone else !” That line was POWERFUL !!!!!!!!

  • @missa9313
    @missa9313 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    One of my favorite lines from the pastor "Someone else's experiences are not your Bible" whew! And how others can affect your relationship 😩

  • @BlickyWhite
    @BlickyWhite 2 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    Aw man we absolutely need a part 2, this was such a dope episode! So much insight and gives you a lot to think about while preparing for marriage and just dating in general.

    • @NiceAndNeatThePodcast
      @NiceAndNeatThePodcast  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      What was your favorite part of the episode?? 🥃🥃🥃

    • @Carlitothegreat
      @Carlitothegreat 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      50:52 was gold. This is key to a healthy partnership

  • @chenelleburdette4604
    @chenelleburdette4604 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Wooow “Your marriage can’t heal your lack of direction” that’s a very powerful message. You can’t take these kind of conversations for granted and I am happy to have found this podcast.

  • @MillionaireLid
    @MillionaireLid 2 ปีที่แล้ว +52

    “Men who are not locked 🔒 into a vision for their lives end up hurting their mates” big facts i’ve always felt like as a man I should have something going and have a very solid understanding of who I am before I bring a woman into the mix. This was further confirmation. Great gems dropped in this episode.

    • @tentrickspony8925
      @tentrickspony8925 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      to be clear...it goes both ways...everyone, man or woman or other...you gotta take care of you first.

    • @jmic101
      @jmic101 ปีที่แล้ว

      Bravo 👏🏽

  • @AdrienneDMayfield
    @AdrienneDMayfield ปีที่แล้ว +19

    1. Who breaks the tie?
    2. Are you compatible with my purpose?
    3. Can we talk finance?
    4. What’s the vision for our marriage?
    5. Do we agree?

    • @cloeespinoza7205
      @cloeespinoza7205 ปีที่แล้ว

      Is there someone who has a bigger voice than me?

  • @emmanuelatilola528
    @emmanuelatilola528 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    You heard him say we can do it again! We need a part 2 & 3!! Exceptional conversation about what’s it’s really like to be in a union, outside of the frivolous things that are amplified to our generation today on social media!

  • @iamolympiag7260
    @iamolympiag7260 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    When he said "are you compatible with my purpose." I was amazed because that really does matter.

  • @mattwalker2877
    @mattwalker2877 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Bruh I'm like five minutes in to this podcast and bro already blew me away! Going through a divorce and this is so on point. My ex and I are still great friends, but my purpose didn't meet our compatibility, but I never knew. Wow so real.

  • @D33Beloved
    @D33Beloved ปีที่แล้ว +3

    1. Compatible with my purpose lifelong
    2. Who breaks the tie
    3 .Financial openess
    4. Vision for Marriage
    5. Agreement

  • @chyrellegraham5788
    @chyrellegraham5788 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I’ve been to many marriage seminars, counseling sessions, meetings. I would say this is by far the best conversation on marriage I’ve experience. I need to follow this man on social platforms because God passed this man some keys. I’m trying to get some doors open

  • @missa9313
    @missa9313 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    I hope we get another show with him as a guest! This is my favorite episode by far 🙌🏾🙌🏾

  • @instrinsiclove
    @instrinsiclove 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Yhew! Man oh man. How is this podcast pushing my mental boundaries EVERY WEEK?! So much new perspective from this episode!

  • @DestinationDionna
    @DestinationDionna 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Wow….. This is one of them ones!!!!!! What a great episode fellas. As a divorced Woman about to remarry I completely agree with the Pastor…..you definitely need a partner who aligns with your purpose!

  • @sarahturtle3270
    @sarahturtle3270 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    1:02:20 - when Omar said “C’mon” three times in a row when pastor was talking I cackled 😂😂😂😂 but it’s soooooo true, commitment and discipline is doing things even while frustrated or not in a happy space. The mission is what pushes us through! Great episode, I literally sent this to all my friends in relationships 😂

  • @saidasavage
    @saidasavage ปีที่แล้ว +4

    “You don’t need a chip on your shoulder to be great” a whole word!

  • @alexandraparker5211
    @alexandraparker5211 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I’m happily married, however I wish I’d heard this before we got married 🥃🥃🥃 love, love, love this. Every bit of this

  • @Monaee3
    @Monaee3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I don’t know how I missed this episode I’m a woman who listens to every episode! This one was very Amazing from start to finish 💯🙌🏾

  • @anamorlamusic
    @anamorlamusic 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    This is by far the most valuable information on marriage/relationships I’ve ever heard 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

  • @You.make.it.
    @You.make.it. 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    That was amazing. “Sometimes I workout mad but when I get done I can say I did that”the wisdom in that. I appreciate y’all bringing this message

  • @queenjee8570
    @queenjee8570 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I love listen to intelligent black men conversing with each other💪🏾👌🏾🥂🎯TOP TIER, Each one teach one. Great show guys, BRAVO

  • @sarcasm176
    @sarcasm176 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Lord protect ME cause this man has BARS. Wow, powerful convo

  • @lee-threeimagery7150
    @lee-threeimagery7150 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    “We’re dangerous without purpose!!”.. Wow!! Powerful episode. Keep up the great work my brothas. I needed to hear this.🙏🏽

  • @RenewingHer
    @RenewingHer 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Wow! This is by far the best episode so far! P Ray is amazing!!

  • @ivyp4142
    @ivyp4142 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This is my new favorite episode, though I love them all. Please bring Pastor Ray back. And can he start a husband school? 🥃🥃🥃

  • @christinaelem7487
    @christinaelem7487 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    There is ALOT of content on a healthy marriage and relationships out there. Books, podcasts and videos from therapists and everyday people who lived it. Of course vet your sources, but there is still alot of reliable content out there. Especially now. It may not use the exact phrase "marriage literacy," but seek and you will definitely find. But this was a GREAT discussion!

  • @jkinese3841
    @jkinese3841 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Ahhhh! It was so good! I didn’t want to listen to this at first, because as a single person no where near marriage, I didn’t know how relevant it would be. But wow, so many takeaways. ”If you don’t have the next chapter, you stay in the current chapter.” …in fear…blew my mind. Figuring out the tie breakers up front, what a great strategy for compromise. Recognizing and acknowledging each others strengths up front before pride is in the way. 😅 The breadwinner giving their stay home spouse a separate allowance account to respect the sacrifice and not dehumanize them, beautiful solution. One can only hope that their partner would be as introspective as you all and surrounded by men like this that can share such wisdom. The way you all self improve, the way you all love your women. I want my community and crew to look like you all! Maybe when I make it back to LA I will connect with you all and your beautiful women. You all are truly a community of inspiration! Oh, and I shared this!

  • @ysin6563
    @ysin6563 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    1:00:27 “I don’t feel it today, but I’m committed”. 👏🏽

  • @valentinewairimu3351
    @valentinewairimu3351 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This is why this is the number one podcast❤️

  • @roea7846
    @roea7846 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    This was a great conversation gentlemen. I love the guest appearances. Pastor was dropping gems.

  • @asipofmosscato
    @asipofmosscato ปีที่แล้ว +5

    By far one of the best episodes so many gems I did not want it to end y’all definitely gotta bring him back ! 🤞🏾

  • @joannaharris6738
    @joannaharris6738 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Shhhhheeeeeeesssh. This is gold! People need to hear this. Men and women. Can’t wait for Part 2 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

  • @JayLeiRay
    @JayLeiRay ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Omar: what’s that called?
    Duke: …discipline
    Me: 😮‍💨
    Fire episode! I didn’t want it to end. God bless all 4 of you 🖤

  • @kathxlene
    @kathxlene 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    The quality of this podcast continues to improve🙌🏽 Visuals & content 👏 Great job you guys 🔥

  • @octaviad9082
    @octaviad9082 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    As a women this episode moved me. I’ve I’m not new to N&N either . But thank you for providing such a great gift to many of us🙏🏾💕
    The pastor is the truth!! Also thanks duke for being transparent and vulnerable as always .
    Blessings guys 🫶🏽

  • @kayshanice689
    @kayshanice689 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Never been married…when I say I took so many notes! Literally, not mentally ✍🏽 this was amazing! 🙌🏽 Stepped on necks but respectfully…so necessary. Very valuable gems here 👏🏽

  • @naej.6844
    @naej.6844 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This was such an insightful episode. Although I am a woman, I still found this to be useful and full of truth. Thank you for all you do fellas!

  • @dawnssunrises6050
    @dawnssunrises6050 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    As one who has experienced every single thing Ray mentioned, it was beautiful to see the The Bruthas in awe of the "Experiences of Marriage & Divorce" that end up being textbook formulas that are not normally taught to us before marriage. #️⃣SubmitToEachOtherIsTheGospel🏆
    Like Ray, I can easily spot a current pending divorce, ppl who are rushing erroneously (bio-clock or not), & unyielding traditionalists heading toward inevitable divorces (before they even get married.) Made & was exposed to all of those mistakes society erroneously trains us to make.
    ALL of these cliche constructs are a moot point if your partner & you are not in full mutual alignment & have no clue who they are separately. Sleeping around while single does not help one figure themselves out. Finding your purpose 1st & healing from family traumas does.🎯

  • @Delonta1221
    @Delonta1221 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    As soon as P Ray said to “open up the books” I thought “okay well if you aren’t ready to hand over your phone and give them everything in it, you surely not ready to do it with your home/marriage/life”

  • @daniellemason8481
    @daniellemason8481 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Amazing 🎉 I really enjoyed the part about being committed even when you aren’t feeling it! Thank you all

  • @MsDookie18
    @MsDookie18 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This was toooo good! We need a part 2!!

  • @eniyabradford8092
    @eniyabradford8092 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    A word! I Thank God he sent me a man that holds me accountable. I knew my purpose but I didn’t have a map!

  • @princess3ks60
    @princess3ks60 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This conversation is important. I’m thankful that I had the opportunity to listen to this. I intend to listen to this message again.

  • @theprmuse
    @theprmuse 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you guys for this! I know as a single lady, this conversation is needed and appreciated! We need more of this especially perspective from our black males

  • @antoinettejohnson1565
    @antoinettejohnson1565 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    When you spend time with them around their family you will see it too.

  • @47Sylvia1
    @47Sylvia1 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This was a great episode. These young men and women need to hear this.

  • @gabriellemm3464
    @gabriellemm3464 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    What a great episode! Such good knowledge 🔑🥃🥃🥃 we need a part 2 of this marriage literacy!

  • @purposefullyzenny
    @purposefullyzenny ปีที่แล้ว

    Wow, what a phenomenal episode. This was truly a blessing to receive.

  • @sunnythree8904
    @sunnythree8904 ปีที่แล้ว

    Beautiful podcast! I’m in love with these topics, the maturity and emotional growth that is being displayed on here with strong black men. I’m listening to all the episodes now..❤❤❤

  • @lepenseur1
    @lepenseur1 ปีที่แล้ว

    Bruuuh, 3/4 in, but the amount of bars Ray's dropping is ridiculous. I'm gonna have to re-listen to it a couple times and take notes. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

  • @cindyl5087
    @cindyl5087 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I absolutely love and enjoyed this podcast SO much. So much valuable knowledge and very valid questions asked and answered. I would love to see more of him on your Podcast!!

  • @G.L.P.
    @G.L.P. 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Incredible conversation! Thank you all for your transparency, intentionally and overall depth in this very much needed topic. I hope you guys get the opportunity to do a part two to this episode. With gratitude 🙏🏽

  • @AnneJay_
    @AnneJay_ ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This episode was amazing. He dropped so many gems 👏🏾

  • @NikitaMaxwell
    @NikitaMaxwell 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    What an insightful episode! So many gems.Thank you💙💙

  • @jmic101
    @jmic101 ปีที่แล้ว

    This podcast ep is truly music to my ears. You guys already know this was a killer conversation. 🔥

  • @alisabee3
    @alisabee3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I think to avoid rushing we have to start dating intentionally. That way you
    Can start to ask the questions needed to determine if that person is gonna be your person.

  • @WhenSaraiSpeaksUListen
    @WhenSaraiSpeaksUListen ปีที่แล้ว

    Whew… this episode 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 so many gems was dropped.
    This should have wayy more views.. AMAZING CONTENT.

  • @gegebuysflorida
    @gegebuysflorida ปีที่แล้ว

    Duke!!! Thank you shedding light on the comments people make on it being time to be married . I needed to hear it. Right on time! Question 4 was directed for me . Thank you!

  • @joyceng3613
    @joyceng3613 ปีที่แล้ว

    I love all of your podcasts and I found the page through Instagram. It’s refreshing to hear grown men’s perspective on these topics that have realistic thoughts on them.

  • @alisabee3
    @alisabee3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Wait I’m not done with the episode but this is a really good episode!!!!

  • @Wholisticbohoo
    @Wholisticbohoo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This was 🔥🔥🔥🔥great one fellas ..
    Will be waiting for part 2🥃🥃🥃

  • @angelbeautii8991
    @angelbeautii8991 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I just love hearing mature black men speak about their experiences and feelings on life and relationships

  • @cinqueh
    @cinqueh 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This convo was tough! It took me an hour in a half to finish from the amount of times I rewinded back. I loved everything but my favorite was the ending 5-8 minutes. “Committed” 🥃🥃

  • @veeboss4853
    @veeboss4853 ปีที่แล้ว

    This episode should go viral! I have to watch again to take notes

  • @FollowingTheCall
    @FollowingTheCall ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Did Omar say "that shit don't matter" in front of the pastor? lol tickled me so lol 😂👏🏾 Great show guys, loved these topics.

  • @ty.ahmara
    @ty.ahmara ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is too good!

  • @victorholloway3983
    @victorholloway3983 ปีที่แล้ว

    Man listen yall boys snapped with this video ❤ pastor was literally preaching 🙌🏾 I've been through exactly everything he was saying 👌🏾 glad I found you guys 😇

  • @denigwasira
    @denigwasira 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Yeah I’m definitely saving & keeping this one… and we really really need a part 2 to this. Incredible 🥃🥃🥃

  • @jordanmccain5299
    @jordanmccain5299 ปีที่แล้ว

    We need a part 2!

  • @kadeshabarnard6320
    @kadeshabarnard6320 ปีที่แล้ว

    “Submit to each other…” I’m in the gym listening to the episode and verbally said YES when I heard that line lol immediately looked around to see if anyone heard me 😂🤷🏽‍♀️ I love it here!

  • @FAITHANDSLIME
    @FAITHANDSLIME 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Such a transformational episode, fellas! Thank you for blessings us
    DEEPLY INSIGHTFUL.

  • @Thegracegod
    @Thegracegod ปีที่แล้ว

    Listen this episode is so deep. It’s so legit. I’m speechless.

  • @houstonveganchick5659
    @houstonveganchick5659 ปีที่แล้ว

    This was another excellent episode. I definitely took notes on this one. Thank you guys for bring beautiful, intelligent, eloquent, inspiring, and healthy content to the social media space.

  • @kerryb.6419
    @kerryb.6419 ปีที่แล้ว

    This was sooo good!! I needed to hear this. Y’all keep doing your thing, you’re blessing many people with these gems of wisdom 💎🙏🏽

  • @keys8885
    @keys8885 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I’m 16 mins in this shit 🔥 🔥 🔥

  • @J15_Savant
    @J15_Savant ปีที่แล้ว

    Some really good and amazing points....take your time!

  • @iammariowilson
    @iammariowilson 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    We need part 2 !!!!🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

  • @genesise5506
    @genesise5506 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    We need a part 2!!! This was amazing!!!

  • @mattwalker2877
    @mattwalker2877 ปีที่แล้ว

    Bros this was one of ya'll best episodes! Definitely sharing it with others! I wish I had this back in the day, but glad it's here now!

  • @jkinese3841
    @jkinese3841 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Admittedly when I saw the title of this video I skipped it lol, but when I saw the short and noticed it was you guys podcast I came back to watch because I knew there would be valuable information lol.

  • @queenqueen1053
    @queenqueen1053 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I absolutely loved this conversation i watched it twice ! I did not get to see marriage at all only on tv. I want to break generational curse of single women so hearing this and what QUESTIONS you should be asking is vital!!! You don’t know what you don’t know and a lot of people are holding certain important things hostage . I want to be in a healthy marriage and i want to make sure I’m equipped and ready . Keep these conversations with creditable people coming so we get the truth and realness . I love nice and neat 🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾💙💙

  • @RealMadrid079
    @RealMadrid079 ปีที่แล้ว

    This podcast was VERY insightful on a lot of aspects on marriage and it is also relatable to a relationship before the marriage! Definitely gave me a different perspective on how to go about choosing someone that is compatible with my purpose and how it all comes together. GREAT episode guys.

  • @JasonOrr1031
    @JasonOrr1031 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Outstanding episode keep it up fellas. 🙌🏾

  • @96Gabyk
    @96Gabyk 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This was fire!! Part 2?

  • @QueenOyinkan
    @QueenOyinkan 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    incredible episode! So many gems!

  • @belledelemos9615
    @belledelemos9615 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Such blessing, please part 2

  • @sherrondadavis4816
    @sherrondadavis4816 ปีที่แล้ว

    This was definitely a great episode and I thank yall for this one.💜🙏🏾 I really do feel like all the information was important so I can't really pick a favorite

  • @simplybayyana
    @simplybayyana ปีที่แล้ว

    This is such a great episode I'm catching up on the old episodes this is amazing! Thank you all for this space, the greatest takeaway I took "is this person compatible with the purpose" I'm definitely going to be coming back to this episode.

  • @zmf7371
    @zmf7371 ปีที่แล้ว

    Great Episode. Very insightful. Shift my mindset on how marriage should have a purpose and function. Need a Part 2 gentlemen. Great, Great Episode

  • @madlintutu6099
    @madlintutu6099 ปีที่แล้ว

    BEST EPISODE!!! Gems upon gems upon gems💎🔥🔥🔥

  • @gegebuysflorida
    @gegebuysflorida ปีที่แล้ว

    Whew!!! Keep these conversations coming!

  • @Kchi_co
    @Kchi_co ปีที่แล้ว

    Such a powerful eye opening episode!!! Seriously incredible words of wisdom from everyone of you! Blessings to y’all and more success with this podcast! Keep y’all foot on the gas!

  • @klace1983
    @klace1983 ปีที่แล้ว

    Amazing episode! Need pt 2 for sure!! 🥃

  • @joshuathompson6690
    @joshuathompson6690 ปีที่แล้ว

    The big thing that needs to pointed out is that PEOPLES PURPOSES change and PEOPLE CHANGE later in the relationship. Complicates things more.

  • @marteciagass4975
    @marteciagass4975 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Great discussion as usual! 👏🏾

  • @Tpres1420
    @Tpres1420 ปีที่แล้ว

    wow this was great, not married but love hearing diff insights on things. I do date and been devoted to my faith so nothing sexual. I just believe this is what most ppl need to hear (men yes, but I believe everyone) shouldn't date until you know your purpose. Good one hear guys

  • @HeReignsBCAD
    @HeReignsBCAD 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Quality content

  • @msjessiedenise
    @msjessiedenise 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    There’s too much! Will definitely listen again and share. So many gems

  • @quanaehamilton6160
    @quanaehamilton6160 ปีที่แล้ว

    We need more!!!