I tend to, almost impulsively, worry about everyone's feelings and whether I spent an equal amount of time/effort with each parent. But this year I don't want to take responsibility for their feelings anymore. I think that behavior is the adult version of the child-of-divorce fear that they (the child) cause their parents' divorce. Now, as adults, a lot of us are worried we cause our parents unhappiness. But just like I'd tell the little child, I'll tell other adults, your parents' unhappiness with a broken family is not your fault. They made the choice for divorce, not you.
I tend to, almost impulsively, worry about everyone's feelings and whether I spent an equal amount of time/effort with each parent. But this year I don't want to take responsibility for their feelings anymore. I think that behavior is the adult version of the child-of-divorce fear that they (the child) cause their parents' divorce. Now, as adults, a lot of us are worried we cause our parents unhappiness. But just like I'd tell the little child, I'll tell other adults, your parents' unhappiness with a broken family is not your fault. They made the choice for divorce, not you.