I've dealt with a Narcissist! Once I found out what I was dealing with I ran for my life! They are dangerous to be around! When you have to Google someone's behavior, Its time to go!
I’ve been dealing with a narcissist for two years. At first it was amazing I thought this man was my soul mate I was wrong. Devalued me, Gas Lighted, blame shifted, and a lot of future faking. Now it’s been 19 days for me no contact it’s been one of the hardest things but I have to stay out of this toxic relationship. Ever time I take him back he does something worse then the last time. THEY NEVER CHANGE smh. Please please educate yourself on these types of individuals. Your not crazy I promise their goal is to keep you in a confused state and to break your spirit to have control over you.
@@la5395 You fell hard for yourself they mimic you initially that's why you thought it to be something special once the masks fall it shows the real person then they constantly make you believe it will get better or at least you want it to be like it was which was a illusion
Be Glad you Walked Away. I'm with you I had it to wear I could no longer take the BS from her along with Future Faking. GOD was always watching over US. Peace.
I have to say that every Narcissist I have ever met was broke and seemed like nice decent men. There's no golden rule to follow for how to determine if someone is a Narcissist. The Narcissist I married was financially comfortable. You must use your spiritual discernment for any person you meet in the times we are living in now. Always ask God to show you who a person really is on the inside.
1. Pay attention if he has a constitution / if he could reciprocate your love. 2. He is fundamentally programmed against relationships (respect for time; how much he learns about you over a period of time; you are seen, heard, and listened to). 3. He gives the energy that you are an option. 4. Watch how they manage their relationships with others. (They have a gift of making you feel bad about yourself) 5. Flattery. 6. Elusive and confusing in conversations. 7. They have extraordinary dreams, but they cannot articulate the plan; 8. Constant recognition. 9. They are envious of people who actually possess the life that they fantasise about.
All of what he's saying is si true. I dated a Narcissist for 6 1/2 years and I knew that somethings was wrong with him and the holy spirit was letting me know to leave this man alone but, I turned a blind eye and didn't want to acknowledge it. I saw the red flags at the beginning. And for a while I was questioning myself if everything was my fault. That demon is real.
Same. Almost 2 years. And now when I look back the red flags are more like blaring red LIGHTS...think, "the bat signal" bright! But it's all good. We recognize our mistake and I pray that God will help us utilize those mistakes and not only learn but HEAL from them. So that next time around we're operating from a place of true worth and discernment because honestly most times God will try to warn you a thousand ways🤷🏾♀️
When people go on with their life, leave them alone. A narcissist is trying to prove a point. Nobody is going back to NO abusive relationship. You didn't appreciate that person when I was there. Dont check for that person once their gone.
Embarrassingly I'm married to one. I saw all the flags but didn't understand my own brokenness that led me to him. I'm in the process of divorcing him and healing me. Thank you for this!
Married to one for 23 years and just got divorced; working through healing now. Not sure he was always one but definitely became more narcissistic, selfish, covertly so and manipulative over last few years. I think Christians, especially women… are told stay married no matter what unless you catch them cheating and even then you just forgive… that needs to debunked so captives can be set free!!!!! Thank you for your truth RC!!!
@@felishataylor1323 I was raised Christian and you are correct. I was told stay married no matter what. Abuse was considered ” thick or thin”. I am not raising my kids to buy into that because it has caused me to make terrible life decisions based on that teaching.
@@felishataylor1323 I am married to one. I am ready to take the same steps. It will be 25yrs soon. I would appreciate if i could speak with you through email, please and thank you.
When a narcissist comes in your life it is spiritual warfare it’s on a spiritual level stay prayed up ask god for strength let them go and pray for their deliverance from a far
SOOOOO TRUE 😭😭😭. The amount of spiritual warfare you’re introduced to because of their recklessness and ignorance to continue in their demonic patterns is selfish, they’re full of pride and don’t receive criticism well.
Therapist here!!!👋🏽👋🏽👋🏽 I'm so grateful for all of your teachings on the narcissist. I've listened to nearly all of them. Providing therapy to victims of narcissism is extremely difficult because of the psychological entanglement. It's even harder if the victim has a history of trauma. The church really needs education on narcissism because they have encouraged people to stay in these types of dangerous (mental and sometimes physical) relationships. Thanks, Pastor Blake and continue teaching. 🙌🏽
I stuck in a toxic narcissistic relationship now 5 years. I left the other day with only the clothes on my back. He was angry at first, accused me having another man, now he calls constantly. Like tonight. He said he had to see me it was very important. I said no and he said I'm rebellious and don't listen. I'm 44. Now he wants to go to counseling. He blacked my eye the other day for the second time. I really love him and I'm in a state of confusion. Can a narc change? Is counseling even worth trying? I pray you see this and respond. Thanks.
@@teew1895just know that one who loves you does not want to hurt you, l wish you strength in disentangling yourself from this abuser. Research trauma bonds, which are often mistaken for love and are actually stronger than love.
@@teew1895this may be too late but I hope you got away. They never change. Counseling will NOT help. Run and don’t look back and get counseling for yourself.
Narcissists are very good actors and very good liars. They’re extremely observant and learn to intentionally reflect what their target wants, but it is only a means to get what they want. The target isn’t attracted to narcissistic traits. Narcissist hide their traits well until their targets are entrapped. Their targets never knew such monsters existed. Not all narcissist are grandiose. Covert narcissist come across very humble and helpful. People with true narcissistic personality disorder are not just self centered braggarts, they are predators who want to destroy their targets. There is most certainly a spiritual black hole in their soul…they do not have the same human feelings and traits that normal people do. And there is no helping them. The only answer is to get out!
Thank you for this message I am in the process of divorcing a narcissist and to be around him is mentally,physically,spiritually,emotionally and financially draining.
Same position I’m in, and he’s fighting for co-parenting with this spirit. I pray every day for healing for my children, him, and I. Yet I limit contact as much as I can. Praying for you Beautiful. No WEAPON formed against you shall prosper!!!!
I'm separated from my husband and I think he's a narc. I'm so confused about everything because I love him but he is so draining and always has something negative to say even when everyone around us is having a good time. 😩 The women from my Bible study have been telling me to wait and pray for him, don't get a divorce. At this point, I'm not sure how or what to do. How did you get to the point of making the decision to divorce?
One way to know that you're dealing with a narcissist is when they take, and take, leaving you feeling depleted. Whereas, you'll receive less, and less or nothing in return. 💙TH-camr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships
It’s our responsibility NOT to just watch these videos for entertainment but to spread the word/share the video. How else can we help others avoid this?
Right. True. Sam Vaknin says the mother is the cause of their brokenness, that narcissist are already married with their cold, dead (emotionally) mothers. Any partner. in their deep subconscious is their mother that they never been separated from and live in a psychological symbiosis. The meaning of word MotherF^ since has deeper meaning for me since...
Exactly!!!! Just had this convo/argument this morning, like just clap your hands and be quiet, why can’t you just encourage without discouraging at the same time!🤦🏽♀️ I am out, yes we are separated
My Father is a narcissist..imagine that traumatic impact that I've had to deal with my entire life. Pastor, you hit the nail on the head with the descriptions. It is real and the pain is valid, and being a child of a narcissist is very difficult because you can't just run away from it
My mother abused me emotionally and physically. She is a narcassist. Through my journey with God I was able to forgive her. 20yrs ago she had a major stroke which has debillated her mentally and physically. Ive had to give up my life to look after her for all of these years.
True, you just can't run away from it. My mother always act out of sort. And devalue me is like she has no love. Anyhow I learnt about narcissist late 2019. And O boy I didn't hesitate to cut them off all of them. My mother is a narcissist
This is very timely. I just wish narcissist would acknowledge their flaws and have a desire to become better. The issue is that they cannot see themselves and they continue to damage everyone they come across. People are left broken because of their behaviour and it takes time to forgive yourself for allowing yourself to be subjected to such emotional abuse and manipulation. If you are struggling to free yourself from such damaging behaviour, stop overthinking and cut the chord. Stop giving them access to your ears. The moment you decide to go, leave. Don't give them the time to manipulate you into staying. They are very good at that. You must want more for yourself. You didn't cause them to be this way. You don't owe it to them to stay so they can damage you too. They are not your assignment. You didn't come here to save them. Save yourself. You deserve more. Love yourself more. With love. x
@@JudionSmith I was with a narc for close to 5 years. Way too much flaking from her and gaslighting while holding me to double standards when it came to basic decency towards a partner. Even though there’s a part of that wishes it would work since I don’t like getting involved in something that is guaranteed to not work, all I can do is pray for her. Doesn’t help that she blocked me to prevent communication on the issues so running away will eventually catch up with her
Thank u Pastor for this dialogue! Thank u Judion...I was with a narc for 14 months! All I wanted for him to say Im sorry and I need to do better in a few areas. But sadly I had to walk away! I'll cut this short a say "Thank You"! My inner wounds are still bleeding from severe emotional abuse...BUT GOD WILL CARRY ME!! Starting over again at 53...is a scary thing & hurtful...but God!😪💗
I am healing from this demonic spirit I been gaslighted, lovebombed, future faking, inconsistency and I don’t even know I trusted his person but now I’m clear on what is going on thank you Pray for me cuz I feel so stupid and dumb for letting someone treat me in such a way
Erika, you're not by yourself. There are many women who had to learn this hard lesson. Just happily move on. Showing your light is the best healing and revenge. Trust God 👌🏾✌🏾💜🙏🏾🤗
Erika, you're not alone. I too never heard anything about a Narcissist. I learn the hard way. This man was so charming. Little did I know he was a monster. October 7, 2020 his mask came off. I stood toe to toe with a demonic being. The man that I faced that night was a total stranger. He screamed and yelling obscenities at me to sit down. When I wouldn't sit down the he pulled and dragged me in the room and turned off the light. I refused to stay so he put me out the house into the night. I left and never looked back. He will REAP WHAT HE SOW. Please ladies and men. Don't stay in a toxic relationship like that.
Narcissist pounce on People who don't have clarity in their lives. Thise that don't have good boundaries, narcissists hate dealing with people that are clear and that have boundaries.
On point! That's how I discovered I am married to a narcissist (on Google, I had competely lost myself) for the past 14yrs! Still in it but on my way out! 14yrs leaving with a complete stranger! It's like I've been living with my enemy! Thank God my life was preserved all these years!
The Narcissist has a leviathan spirit. They need deliverance. I agree it will take divine intervention. They are self absorbed. The word said “every need shall bow and every tongue shall confess that Jesus Christ is Lord”.
You are spot on as usual 👌 when you said that narcissist aren't built for relationships, but they will have relations with you, business or personal. I told my ex husband that he was barely able to be a half decent boyfriend to a woman but definitely not husband material. They don't get in any relationship to pour into it, only whatever they can extract.
Setting BOUNDARIES often determine if you’re dealing with a Narc. They will see it as a game to be played. You will then see what you are dealing with ….
Narcissistic people run in packs, especially in families. If the authority in the household is a narcissist...there will be others in that family!! I realized that I grew up around several narcissistic family members.
8months no contact with a man I was madly in love with for 2 1/2 years. I’ve never experienced such things. I’m still healing from this hurt. And the soul tie is difficult to sever but necessary. When you start doing the inner work & start loving yourself & healing, your progress in this, is the only thing that should matter….thanks for your videos 🙏
Bishop Blakes is explaining exactly the red flags that I saw/felt. It was all about him and after 4 months he knew very little about me. Had no problem in connecting with other women and thought nothing of it. RC Blakes “He’s fundamentally programmed against relationships”. True words. He didn’t really want a real connection. He would try to reconnect and would turn on the charm like a faucet. I had to look at myself and realize that I was allowing it to happen. Kept thinking that maybe I had evaluated him too harshly. I finally saw what was going on and the penny dropped! Ended it. Thanks so much for your teachings. They are priceless. 🙏🏼
❤️❤️❤️A LOT of the toxic relationships we jump into, they could've been avoided by simply TAKING OUR TIME to learn the person we are with, and also learning/evaluating their true intentions/character. Doesn't matter how healthy you are emotionally/mentally... IF you do not take your time with people, you will ALWAYS be misled by the mask they have on. They are professionals at creating the illusion of love and empathy. That illusion falls apart once we practice patience. So many of us jump into relationship so quickly because we don't want to lose a good thing. But with time, you'll usually find out that, your "good thing" was just a mirage. Deception can not out last time. When you meet new people, GIVE IT TIME... Even if that means being friends with them for 3-5 years before dating them.
@CL_P you said it right and said it well. Growing up i would hear the women in my family say " you get over one, by getting under one." And so I got off the porch and did just that. At 35 now, I've learned that, along with many other misguided lessons passed down generationally, that way ain't it. More importantly, it's not in alignment with my Creator's way. Like you said, much could've been avoided by simply taking our time. It's only by God's undeserved grace and mercy that I'm here today to salute your truth and to testify on my tests!!! You stepped on some toes, but your honesty and genuity was much needed. Take care🧡
@@EE-cr2uv Yes, you're right. So many bad lessons we have learned from bad advice from family and friends. I also agree... If it's not in the Lord's wisdom, we just shouldn't feed on what's given to us to digest. Like the verse says, "Let patience have her PERFECT work, that you may be entire wanting nothing."
The one thing I learned after breaking free from a very traumatic relationship with a narcissist is to cut them off at the root. It is literally a dose of their own medicine.
Just found out my friend of 30 years is a narcissist. On the day my cousin was killed by police, I confided in her. She turned around and shared good news about her family. No empathy.
What part of you is so broken that you attract such individuals? Thank you ‼️ I needed to hear that. 🎯 🎯 He said: "they are emotional chess players". ✔️
Pastor, thank you for addressing this. In fact, a narcissist WILL expend a lot of effort getting to know all about you in the beginning so that they can use all of that information to mirror you and then love-bomb you into securing you as supply. The difference is that it isn't because they are truly interested in you; it is manipulation not genuine. Once you are 'secured' that's when the real self comes out and there is no time, energy or true interest displayed toward you any longer.
I'm reminded of what my advisor in college told me, "trust your intuition, it's very powerful". Everything you have said confirmed what I knew, but questioned because of his celebrity. No doubt now, thank you. It is demonic. I heard someone say; the spirit is always preparing us, or protecting us. I give thanks to the MOST HIGH, for his continual protection.
Dear God if I only received this wisdom 26 years ago! What makes it even worse is that they are completely delusional and clueless about their behavior. Keep the wisdom coming this way Bishop 🔥
@CM - they are not clueless about their behavior. Which is why they try to Hoover you back, fake tears, crying. Cuz they know what they do- they just hoping YOU DON’T KNOW .. AND FIGURE THEM OUT.
They use people like toy, inflict a lot of pain and, call you names , make you feel guilty, accept guilt when you are not at fault.They have a way of getting a good woman/man.Very draining
Lucifer was the first narcissist.. selfish - envious of God.. This was the beginning. It's as old as time.. My soon to be out book REFLECTIONS OF THE CURSE.. journey of a woman's heart.. explains it well.
Sad to say that I have dealt with more than one narcissist in my life . Needlessly to say, I have suffered tremendously, but to that same extend I have I have suffered, I have healed and grown. It took me years to untangle myself from the web that kept me stuck in suffering from one unhealthy relationship to another one. But one thing I did is that I worked on myself fearlessly and non-stop. Not only did I gathered information through many videos such as this one, read books, joined college as adult (studied psychology) but I also did the work of confronting my childhood issues. From childhood neglect, to daddy issues, low self esteem, poor self image, I shed light on every dark corner of my soul. Although we are never done with our inner growth, I can say for sure that I will not be allowing another narcissist into my life because I now have enough tools to protect myself. Notice I used the word “allowing” not “ attracting “ as that is one of the things I learn from my therapist. She said, “ We don’t attract this or that, as there is everything on the spectrum out there ; We allow them in because our weak boundaries ! “ And so I had to learn what I was not taught- that it is my clear and strong boundaries that will keep me safe. Due to a very neglectful childhood, there was a lot of pain I needed to process. In particular, I walked around unconsciously looking for my daddy which caused my heart to be devour by the wrong men. Also, my maladaptive survival response of “ fawning “ (the use of people-pleasing to diffuse conflict, feel more secure in relationships, and earn the approval of others) kept me in a vicious cycle with toxic people. Boundaries did not all of a sudden fall from the sky. Before I was able to learn some healthy boundaries, I had to work hard at carving self love other than that , I felt “ too guilty “ for putting myself first. And … most importantly, I needed to give up the addiction for the approval of others and regain my ability to have agency and stand alone. I’m sharing this to say that healing is possible, as well as changing the things that are very ingrained within us, if only we put in the work and be consistent. Thank you for your videos and specifically for your prayer. I received it. I cried, and I healed a little bit more . Amen 🙏
@bpassion4fashion thank you for sharing your experience. Your past and childhood mirrors mine. I am currently on my path of self love. Some days are better than others. I will use and implement some of your suggestions. It’s a rough journey as I never knew what it was to love myself. Thank you ❤
Thanks for sharing your testimony. I just left my narc of 5 years. I have peace but my life is in chaos because I only left with the clothes on my back. I know I need counseling and lots of prayer.
I totally agree with your message pastor.. I am currently in my first relationship with a narcissist.. going on 3 years 👎🏽. I want to bring for consideration the point that narcissist usually don’t come in the door showing their true self.. They are very good at disguise. Mine presented as a kind, soft spoken, sociable, friendly person. By the time I was able to see his narcissistic personality my heart and my feelings was involved. At that point I didn’t know what a narcissist was so I thought I had the power to change his ways with my love…but that was not possible. Now I want out and just pray that God helps me remove all this feelings from my heart so I can finally let go and stop accepting him back in my life. Please pray for me! And thank you for your message it was perfectly explained.
Here's two weeks after. I hope you've been able to leave and not look back. He'll definitely hover that's what they do but stand strong. If you haven't left just yet, I pray you find the strength to walk away and never look back in Jesus name.
Very true love. I was caught up for five years. First I was like yes my soulmate then I began walking on eggshells in my own home to being scared of him. Please get out baby it only gets worse. He put me in the ER twice Mr. I NEVER hit women. I'm praying for you. I've been away from almost 2 years and he's in jail right now for a terroristic threat on me from a year ago. God is GOOD!🙏🏿❤
Sounds like a soul tie sweetie. That's why it's so hard to leave. Go before the Lord and repent. Do some fasting & warfare and break the bond. It's demonic. I have been there. I will pray for your victory.
I can't wait to hear this segment bishop blakes! Set boundaries, know your worth, and let God take care of the rest! Keep us encouraged and uplifted! Blessings to you sir and Lady Blakes for being spiritual parents to us! ❤️ 😍 💖 🙌🏾 👏🏽
I was married to one. Was ready to divorce by tbt second month of marriage. I let him be the one to pull the trigger after 8 months when after taking 2 cross country trips he returned home and informed me he no longer wanted to be married so I just said okay. Got myself a lawyer and freed myself from that demon.
Why?? We learn it at home, it is modelled by our parents relationship, so we keep on choosing the same pattern in partners, unconsciously, till we wake up to it. When we became conscious, no-one can play us no more . I'm so glad you touch the other side, the person who allows it to happen. That is the key . Nothing happens to us, without our consent . It is not only the narc, me too, the realization changed my life.🙂
I’ve been dating someone for 4 months now. We knew each other a long time ago, but recently came together. It occurred to me he could have been love bombing in the beginning, but I thought we were both just so grateful we found each other again. But the problems started coming with communication, then there were some signs of lack of empathy on occasions. Soon I started detecting gaslighting, and now he’s saying hurtful things. As the relationship progresses, as I push back and try to speak up and set boundaries, it seems to get worse. It seems like everyone is throwing around the word narcissist lately, so I hesitate to label, but this relationship isn’t feeling healthy. It’s so hard to know when to keep trying to fix, and when to walk away.
I met him and identified quickly something wasn't right. Yet still entertained him for two years?! Yes it's me.....met at a time of grieving both parents and being in a new city alone. I wanted so badly to see good and have the company. But God.....I washed my hands and took that lesson and moved forward.
bottom line: THANK YOU GOD that I was taught to love myself to the point where I have NEVER allowed and i am NOT EVER going to allow ANY male--naracissist, toxic, healthy, broken, or whatever--to snatch me off my throne, no matter how much I THINK I want him in my life.... I'd rather continue reigning alone! listening to this brother HELPS to keep me strong enough to stand my ground which results in me NOT going through a whole lot of...NONSENSE...that far too many women go through because they settle...and don't want to be alone. looking forward to receiving more strength from the next video. THANK YOU, BROTHER!!!!!
Embarrassingly this video made me realize that I carry some narcissistic traits. Not all, but I had always thought my partner had more of these traits than I did, but I was wrong. I want to be different and do better and am prayerful about God transforming my heart.
You're absolutely correct about this being a spiritual issue, or rather lack thereof. When you have no belief in anything higher than yourself... No connection to God... Then there are no repercussions for your actions. This is a very dangerous person to give your love/life to.
I am currently getting out of a relationship and this man meets all and each of the criteria that RC Blakes mentioned in this video. The gas lighting, the manipulation, the controlling and worst part has always been when he wanted to come back he would have different empty promises he would act on 1 or 2 the most but then would go back to his normal self. I am very thankful that this time I have learned to say bye for good I have been no contact close to a month and it's hard because all his family loves me and I love them too but this man needs to be away from me. Lady's seek for God's strength. Love yourselves and keep your eyes open. Thank you bishop RC Blake's for your content. God bless you and your family.
Bishop thank you so much for this much needed word!!! I’m still getting my life back on track from narcissistic abuse. Blessings to you and First Lady Lisa Blakes!!!!!
I just wanted say as Married Christian Man, I’m Married to a Narcissist. I’ve read Kingology 3x. I was a single father of a little Queen. Prior to meeting my wife. I feel for my daughter and myself. My EYES HAVE BEEN OPENED by this video, as do all your videos do about myself as a Man And King in Gods image. the Lord has been revealing it to me on a daily basis. I thank you for this.
Thank you pastor. I have not heard of gaslighting as equivalent to driving a person completely nuts. I'm thankful for a protected mind and priceless peace of mind.
Everyone should be sharing this with their friends and family. It’s not just enough to watch for entertainment purposes. Your sharing might just save a life!
51:30 Yep. Being married to a narcissist is almost the worst thing in the world...only superceded by attempting to coparent with a narcissist. You can't keep subjecting yourself to their demons, trying to "save" them with love. Only God can heal them. In the meantime, they cause near irreparable damage.
I was raised by one so it was the norm for me. I removed my father from my life but still didn’t know this abuse had a name so was doomed to repeat the cycle. Then I was in a 10 year relationship with one that was identical to my Dad. By year 8 the penny started to drop that this was not normal behaviour. I binge watched TH-cam videos for 2 years, learning about it and retraining and resetting my childhood programming. Then I built up a supportive social network in preparation for my escape so the hoovering would be unsuccessful. Then I found RC Blake’s who became my surrogate father to teach me the way moving forward. I’ve been narc free for 3 years now living in peaceful bliss. I’ve been targeted by more since; but I can now spot them very quickly and it’s great training for asserting boundaries and removing them without drama. That 10 year abusive relationship was hell but it was the key to unlock everything I didn’t know about my past and the lock to prevent any more from ever effecting my life again.
It's funny when one thinks it's "only them" going thru things and nobody understands. I'm married 24 yrs, SAW the red flags🚩🚩 in the 90"s when we met, but honestly didn't know what a narcissist was. I don't think I heard this term until I was in my late 30's/+40'. I'm 50 now. I am exhausted. I am done. It's time for me to breathe.
When I left an abusive relationship with a narcissist I was with for 4 years. I had to move in with my sister until i was able to get on my feet again. It was like, I was basically dealing with him all over again just as my sister. Its sad when its your own family member. Im in a better place in life now and I keep my sister at a distance
Good evening Bishop RC. Thanks for revisiting this topic. I'm being hoovered by my ex narc-a relationship that ended 3mths ago. Thank God for being set free by the power of the Holy Spirit; with His (Holy spirit's) help I'm staying strong. Please address how survivors can resist the hoover. Thank you.
I’m beginning to think the hoovering is ongoing. Me and my ex split over and year and he’s still hoovering. I’ve had to block him from every social media site and from my phone. That still hasn’t stopped him. I’ve had my number for 13 years, I shouldn’t have to change it. They’re Miserable souls
This is me right here! I've blocked him on all social platforms but he still travelled miles to see me. I turned him back at my gate. He's highly and extremely manipulative
@@likewhoa577 The Hoover doesn't stop because we put up with so much abuse. They think I'll get her back and she'll pay for making me work so hard to get her back. Been there done that! Every single time it was the unspeakable. Things I would Never tolerate! I had to move out of state to heal. It's really sad, but that DEMON is REAL! Be careful love🙏🏿❤
What I get from what you are saying is do not be unequally yoked to unbelievers. I've been delivered from narcissistic abuse but I keep myself in focused for future relationships. Thanks Pastor Blakes, you are my go to when info is needed. I highly recommend you. Be blessed and shalom, peace to you!
My Nex was a nightmare, I got stuck on his breadcrumbing. His physical abuse of me was awful and his constant texting other women and denying it….it was starting to get me down and I’m not that type of person. I broke free of him a few months ago and the relief is immense. Thank you for your lessons ❤️🙏
First I met a man who I knew wasn’t being his true self so I asked and observed until I saw the real him and that’s when I realized he was a narcissist. I never heard the term before. I thought I had the behavior down and then I met a covert narcissist and was blind sided. Now I feel like I just graduated from the Course on narcissism and I can hold my own class. But alas I still must be observant and not let my guard down.
Coverts are the worst. They slither in under the radar. By the time you figure it out your in deep somehow if they have had their way. They go for the quick innocuous lock down to trap you.
Same story. He was covert as well but I thought I was secure in the relationship, that facade was perfection. Wrong! Now I can spot a narcissist 5 miles away. I thank God everyday for the lessons I learned by being in that relationship. Honor your boundaries, listen to your intuition, use wisdom and discernment.
@@likewhoa577 WHAT ARE THE SIGNS OF SPRING A COVERT NARC THAT YOU LEARNED? PLEASE HELP US TO RECOGNIZE THE SIGNS. I'D LOVE TO GAIN THE KNOWLEDGE THEY YOUR EXPERIENCE. BLESSINGS!
I think I am a narcissit and i just pray that god takes this way so i can live pure and righteous and have some integrity and become a real man. please pray for me yall i was born again a while back but I fell off being as religious as i used to be being brought up in a Christian church-going family. i been messing up and i hope god forgive me for my sins..
So true. This subject needs to be kept in the forefront of our discussions. This might be able to spare many who are not yet in bondage with such people. We are about +/- 35 years late for our generation with these discussions but better later than never.
I’m so glad your talking about this again I’ve returned for the 6th time they say it takes 7-11 times to leave the situation. However I’ve learned God put me here to bring me through to break generational curses so I’m trusting the process, gaining and pulling what I need from this horrific experience so I can shut it down!!
@@amerokeewiya1320 Judge not hunny! No, it wasn’t obviously because when God does a thing He will take you through every aspect of it and show you all of your weaknesses He will break you down to thrust you forward so pay attention and remember my name because the biggest part of all of it has been trusting the process no matter how painful or confusing. You judge and it’s ok because it’s not for anyone else to understand
My most favorite and helpful mentor cant thank you enough for walking me out of an unhealthy relationship..was very hard to leave a situationship but much needed and now I am continuing to watch & keep my eyes open to recognize a Mans behavior!!
I've been listening to you for awhile now. I love your content. I want to add this. I'm married to what I believe is one. There's two types. You have the one that is easy to spot because they draw the attention to themselves. However, the covert narcissist is the one that catches men. These are the ones who need a little help and viewed as being picked on. They show their low self esteem, and have an ability to disguise their intentions. You normally finds out the damage from your circle of peers. Example maybe they are irresponsible with money or children, but when they talk to others they will say it's you who are bad with money or the neglectful parent. They tear you down behind the scenes. Once again l love your content. Keep blessing ppl.
I just wanted to THANK YOU for this content RC Blakes. Very powerful and informative because, I just recently by the grace of god had removed myself from a narcissistic woman. To be honest; still in the healing process but because of your words and god given knowledge. I can now prepare myself to see what is within me that attracts this type to me. This content was truly a blessing.
I am in the middle of a split He is still in the home. But now it is over god showed me after a lot of yrs. I feel so embarrassed god woke me up Thankyou pastor the pain is so bad.
My whole life has been destroyed by narcissist now I’m left to pick up all the pieces by myself my life has been a battle zone - i’m afraid to talk to any person pretty much because I feel like they’re either going to not like me because I have too much trauma or they’re going to be a toxic person that just going to use and abuse me all over again. It’s rough out here especially as a woman with no protection. - edit - I would like to add that I’m not just referring to romance relationships I’m talking about being born into a family of narcissist and not even realizing that you’re dating a narcissist because You were raised to be broken
Thank GOD. Thank GOD, for you pastor Blakes for speaking about this pertinent topic.❤❤🙏🙏 For I've learned a narcissistic individual usually will return Void, leaving one bankrupt!!
You are indeed an awesome teacher of the word of the most high. What I love most about how you convey scriptures. You use simplicity with our everyday life and where us at in scriptures that even a child can understand ! You dont do all the guivering of the voice , the hollowering and breathing all hard with the music in the background to sound all dramatic. You just keep it real and lay it out there. Thats what people need.
I've dealt with a Narcissist! Once I found out what I was dealing with I ran for my life! They are dangerous to be around! When you have to Google someone's behavior, Its time to go!
I totally agree with you 💯got to go 🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️🏃🏽♀️
Shar Hughes, Amen it's time to go!.you're absolutely correct!
spot on!!!!! when you need to google someone’s behavior it’s definitely time to cut ties.
Amen
You are telling the truth!
I’ve been dealing with a narcissist for two years. At first it was amazing I thought this man was my soul mate I was wrong. Devalued me, Gas Lighted, blame shifted, and a lot of future faking. Now it’s been 19 days for me no contact it’s been one of the hardest things but I have to stay out of this toxic relationship. Ever time I take him back he does something worse then the last time. THEY NEVER CHANGE smh. Please please educate yourself on these types of individuals. Your not crazy I promise their goal is to keep you in a confused state and to break your spirit to have control over you.
Very deep, thanks for sharing your experience
Help
Kill steal destroy
@@la5395
You fell hard for yourself they mimic you initially that's why you thought it to be something special once the masks fall it shows the real person then they constantly make you believe it will get better or at least you want it to be like it was which was a illusion
Be Glad you Walked Away. I'm with you I had it to wear I could no longer take the BS from her along with Future Faking. GOD was always watching over US. Peace.
Amen stop letting these people in your lives!!! Self esteem is everything they can not destroy a confident Christian!
I have to say that every Narcissist I have ever met was broke and seemed like nice decent men. There's no golden rule to follow for how to determine if someone is a Narcissist. The Narcissist I married was financially comfortable. You must use your spiritual discernment for any person you meet in the times we are living in now. Always ask God to show you who a person really is on the inside.
They can be presidential a lawyer the therapist ,teachers well off...or everything in between...
They do have similar personalities...
God says man looks on the outward appearance but God looks at the heart! The heart is everything!
1. Pay attention if he has a constitution / if he could reciprocate your love. 2. He is fundamentally programmed against relationships (respect for time; how much he learns about you over a period of time; you are seen, heard, and listened to). 3. He gives the energy that you are an option. 4. Watch how they manage their relationships with others. (They have a gift of making you feel bad about yourself) 5. Flattery. 6. Elusive and confusing in conversations. 7. They have extraordinary dreams, but they cannot articulate the plan; 8. Constant recognition. 9. They are envious of people who actually possess the life that they fantasise about.
Thank you for summarizng Pastor Blakes teachings on this video Re: signs that you may be dealing with a narcissist. Its appreciated!!xx🙏
Absolutely on point
All these characteristics are spot on! Definitely fits the pattern of narcissistic individuals.
Sounds a lot like this fucking douchebag.
🎯🎯🎯
All of what he's saying is si true. I dated a Narcissist for 6 1/2 years and I knew that somethings was wrong with him and the holy spirit was letting me know to leave this man alone but, I turned a blind eye and didn't want to acknowledge it. I saw the red flags at the beginning. And for a while I was questioning myself if everything was my fault. That demon is real.
Me, too
2 1/2 years!
Same. Almost 2 years. And now when I look back the red flags are more like blaring red LIGHTS...think, "the bat signal" bright! But it's all good. We recognize our mistake and I pray that God will help us utilize those mistakes and not only learn but HEAL from them. So that next time around we're operating from a place of true worth and discernment because honestly most times God will try to warn you a thousand ways🤷🏾♀️
17 years
They are wicked
When people go on with their life, leave them alone. A narcissist is trying to prove a point. Nobody is going back to NO abusive relationship. You didn't appreciate that person when I was there. Dont check for that person once their gone.
💯
True. True.👌
Very true! I left after 26 years
Absolutely 100% Correct.
Facts💯
Embarrassingly I'm married to one. I saw all the flags but didn't understand my own brokenness that led me to him. I'm in the process of divorcing him and healing me. Thank you for this!
No need to be embarrassed SisStar! You've just empowered me to face the facts around me and do the same!
Married to one for 23 years and just got divorced; working through healing now. Not sure he was always one but definitely became more narcissistic, selfish, covertly so and manipulative over last few years. I think Christians, especially women… are told stay married no matter what unless you catch them cheating and even then you just forgive… that needs to debunked so captives can be set free!!!!! Thank you for your truth RC!!!
Sending love
@@felishataylor1323 I was raised Christian and you are correct. I was told stay married no matter what. Abuse was considered ” thick or thin”. I am not raising my kids to buy into that because it has caused me to make terrible life decisions based on that teaching.
@@felishataylor1323 I am married to one. I am ready to take the same steps. It will be 25yrs soon. I would appreciate if i could speak with you through email, please and thank you.
When a narcissist comes in your life it is spiritual warfare it’s on a spiritual level stay prayed up ask god for strength let them go and pray for their deliverance from a far
Wow
SOOOOO TRUE 😭😭😭. The amount of spiritual warfare you’re introduced to because of their recklessness and ignorance to continue in their demonic patterns is selfish, they’re full of pride and don’t receive criticism well.
Very true. ❤
This is so true…I’m like Lord what are you trying to tell me in this season about these ppl? Warfare was one of the answers
Therapist here!!!👋🏽👋🏽👋🏽 I'm so grateful for all of your teachings on the narcissist. I've listened to nearly all of them. Providing therapy to victims of narcissism is extremely difficult because of the psychological entanglement. It's even harder if the victim has a history of trauma. The church really needs education on narcissism because they have encouraged people to stay in these types of dangerous (mental and sometimes physical) relationships. Thanks, Pastor Blake and continue teaching. 🙌🏽
I stuck in a toxic narcissistic relationship now 5 years. I left the other day with only the clothes on my back. He was angry at first, accused me having another man, now he calls constantly. Like tonight. He said he had to see me it was very important. I said no and he said I'm rebellious and don't listen. I'm 44. Now he wants to go to counseling. He blacked my eye the other day for the second time. I really love him and I'm in a state of confusion. Can a narc change? Is counseling even worth trying? I pray you see this and respond. Thanks.
@@teew1895 Watch videos on the following channel - DoctorRamani and Mental Healness Lee Hammock.
@@teew1895just know that one who loves you does not want to hurt you, l wish you strength in disentangling yourself from this abuser. Research trauma bonds, which are often mistaken for love and are actually stronger than love.
Bishop is a rare breed....he always talk about choose u when being mistreated & take advantage of . He's been such a blessing to my life.
@@teew1895this may be too late but I hope you got away. They never change. Counseling will NOT help. Run and don’t look back and get counseling for yourself.
Narcissist are spiritually broken with broken wounds
True
Narcissists are very good actors and very good liars. They’re extremely observant and learn to intentionally reflect what their target wants, but it is only a means to get what they want. The target isn’t attracted to narcissistic traits. Narcissist hide their traits well until their targets are entrapped. Their targets never knew such monsters existed. Not all narcissist are grandiose. Covert narcissist come across very humble and helpful. People with true narcissistic personality disorder are not just self centered braggarts, they are predators who want to destroy their targets. There is most certainly a spiritual black hole in their soul…they do not have the same human feelings and traits that normal people do. And there is no helping them. The only answer is to get out!
Well said! 💯
Run Like Hell!
I wish I knew this at 17.
Smooth operator ❤❤❤❤🎉🎉🎉🎉be ware
Thank you for this message I am in the process of divorcing a narcissist and to be around him is mentally,physically,spiritually,emotionally and financially draining.
It is like fighting a demon, everyday. Peace and blessings to you my sister on your journey.
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 2 Timothy 1:1 therefore I exhort first all that supplications, prayers, intercessions and giving of Thanks be made for all men.
I’m in the same process girl!!! Stay strong, focused and keep your peace and don’t fight back. That’s what he want for fuel. Just some small advise.
Same position I’m in, and he’s fighting for co-parenting with this spirit. I pray every day for healing for my children, him, and I. Yet I limit contact as much as I can. Praying for you Beautiful. No WEAPON formed against you shall prosper!!!!
I'm separated from my husband and I think he's a narc. I'm so confused about everything because I love him but he is so draining and always has something negative to say even when everyone around us is having a good time. 😩 The women from my Bible study have been telling me to wait and pray for him, don't get a divorce. At this point, I'm not sure how or what to do. How did you get to the point of making the decision to divorce?
One way to know that you're dealing with a narcissist is when they take, and take, leaving you feeling depleted. Whereas, you'll receive less, and less or nothing in return.
💙TH-camr That Helps People Overcome Toxic Relationships
The core emotion is ENVY 💥
They isolate and alienate you from others.
The fact that you call this person out on his/her behavior with proof they still don't admit to it...
MY PRAYER IS THAT AS WOMEN WE WOULD HEAR AND LEARN AND DON'T ALLOW OURSELVES TO REPEAT THESE UGLY PAINFUL SITUATIONSHIP AGAIN
IN JESUS CHRIST NAME WE PRAY 🙏. AMEN.
It’s our responsibility NOT to just watch these videos for entertainment but to spread the word/share the video. How else can we help others avoid this?
AMEN 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
@@kita-1116 I have birth a platform from Mt pain
which has cause ne great gain
I have a platform called
We Are Overcomers
Come join with us
His own mother told me not to settle for him. That's when I knew I wasn't crazy.
Right. True. Sam Vaknin says the mother is the cause of their brokenness, that narcissist are already married with their cold, dead (emotionally) mothers. Any partner. in their deep subconscious is their mother that they never been separated from and live in a psychological symbiosis. The meaning of word MotherF^ since has deeper meaning for me since...
Yes!! My husband would always give a compliment with an insult.
I never even get the compliment just the insult
@@typorter660 - same here
😲 😱
Definitely
Backhanded
Exactly!!!! Just had this convo/argument this morning, like just clap your hands and be quiet, why can’t you just encourage without discouraging at the same time!🤦🏽♀️ I am out, yes we are separated
My Father is a narcissist..imagine that traumatic impact that I've had to deal with my entire life. Pastor, you hit the nail on the head with the descriptions. It is real and the pain is valid, and being a child of a narcissist is very difficult because you can't just run away from it
It's definitely hard when it is a parental figure. The atmosphere in the home is very unstable, dysfunctional, and filled with traumatic memories.
My mother abused me emotionally and physically. She is a narcassist. Through my journey with God I was able to forgive her. 20yrs ago she had a major stroke which has debillated her mentally and physically. Ive had to give up my life to look after her for all of these years.
Is your father good with women did he have multiple women?
@@2888HA0264 God will bless you for being there for your mother and forgiving her for the hurt that she inflicted on you.
True, you just can't run away from it. My mother always act out of sort. And devalue me is like she has no love. Anyhow I learnt about narcissist late 2019. And O boy I didn't hesitate to cut them off all of them. My mother is a narcissist
This is very timely. I just wish narcissist would acknowledge their flaws and have a desire to become better. The issue is that they cannot see themselves and they continue to damage everyone they come across. People are left broken because of their behaviour and it takes time to forgive yourself for allowing yourself to be subjected to such emotional abuse and manipulation. If you are struggling to free yourself from such damaging behaviour, stop overthinking and cut the chord. Stop giving them access to your ears. The moment you decide to go, leave. Don't give them the time to manipulate you into staying. They are very good at that. You must want more for yourself. You didn't cause them to be this way. You don't owe it to them to stay so they can damage you too. They are not your assignment. You didn't come here to save them. Save yourself. You deserve more. Love yourself more. With love. x
Well stated…. We have to love ourselves. All we can do for the narcs that have exited our lives is pray for them
@@ksquareshow4480 So true...
I agree 100%!
@@JudionSmith I was with a narc for close to 5 years. Way too much flaking from her and gaslighting while holding me to double standards when it came to basic decency towards a partner. Even though there’s a part of that wishes it would work since I don’t like getting involved in something that is guaranteed to not work, all I can do is pray for her. Doesn’t help that she blocked me to prevent communication on the issues so running away will eventually catch up with her
Thank u Pastor for this dialogue! Thank u Judion...I was with a narc for 14 months! All I wanted for him to say Im sorry and I need to do better in a few areas. But sadly I had to walk away! I'll cut this short a say "Thank You"! My inner wounds are still bleeding from severe emotional abuse...BUT GOD WILL CARRY ME!! Starting over again at 53...is a scary thing & hurtful...but God!😪💗
I am healing from this demonic spirit I been gaslighted, lovebombed, future faking, inconsistency and I don’t even know I trusted his person but now I’m clear on what is going on thank you Pray for me cuz I feel so stupid and dumb for letting someone treat me in such a way
❤️
Erika, you're not by yourself. There are many women who had to learn this hard lesson. Just happily move on. Showing your light is the best healing and revenge. Trust God 👌🏾✌🏾💜🙏🏾🤗
@@anjulheart6476 I am moving forward from this and getting and staying in my word and becoming closer with God
Erika, you're not alone. I too never heard anything about a Narcissist. I learn the hard way. This man was so charming. Little did I know he was a monster. October 7, 2020 his mask came off. I stood toe to toe with a demonic being. The man that I faced that night was a total stranger. He screamed and yelling obscenities at me to sit down. When I wouldn't sit down the he pulled and dragged me in the room and turned off the light. I refused to stay so he put me out the house into the night. I left and never looked back. He will REAP WHAT HE SOW. Please ladies and men. Don't stay in a toxic relationship like that.
@@erikaanthony2726 You're an inspiration! Awesome! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👌🏾✌🏾
“ I Love Me too much, to allow my love for you, to let you do the damage that I know you can do in my life” -RC Blakes
Yesss
🎯🎯🎯
Teach_
Narcissist pounce on People who don't have clarity in their lives. Thise that don't have good boundaries, narcissists hate dealing with people that are clear and that have boundaries.
FACTS!
Lord, thank you! This is a much needed message as so many are actively involved and/or healing from this demonic Spirit. Thank you Pastor Blakes! ❤️
Q1qq1
Very demonic!😡
On point! That's how I discovered I am married to a narcissist (on Google, I had competely lost myself) for the past 14yrs! Still in it but on my way out! 14yrs leaving with a complete stranger! It's like I've been living with my enemy! Thank God my life was preserved all these years!
Ditto ditto ditto 🎯
He destroyed my life I'm so miserable I really regret ever meeting him that devil is so evil and defiled
This is what I’m saying when you lose your own self, thank God for being in the way out…🤦🏽♀️🙏🙏🙏
The Narcissist has a leviathan spirit. They need deliverance. I agree it will take divine intervention. They are self absorbed. The word said
“every need shall bow and every tongue shall confess that Jesus Christ is Lord”.
You are spot on as usual 👌 when you said that narcissist aren't built for relationships, but they will have relations with you, business or personal. I told my ex husband that he was barely able to be a half decent boyfriend to a woman but definitely not husband material. They don't get in any relationship to pour into it, only whatever they can extract.
The stress and negativity on this earth today - is creating more and more narcissists.
Setting BOUNDARIES often determine if you’re dealing with a Narc. They will see it as a game to be played. You will then see what you are dealing with ….
A lot of people don’t know what they are dealing with up front ! Narcissist are usually very charming at first! Then Doctor Jekyll! Out !
You stated this perfectly. 🎯💯
Narcissistic people run in packs, especially in families. If the authority in the household is a narcissist...there will be others in that family!! I realized that I grew up around several narcissistic family members.
Yep! I've noticed this too!
I've experienced one. It was the worst thing ive had to endure. It changes you.
Yes for the better after the pain
The devil thought he had us community but God loved us more.🙏
Definitely. And it'll NEVER happen again if you get a COVERT
8months no contact with a man I was madly in love with for 2 1/2 years. I’ve never experienced such things. I’m still healing from this hurt. And the soul tie is difficult to sever but necessary. When you start doing the inner work & start loving yourself & healing, your progress in this, is the only thing that should matter….thanks for your videos 🙏
Bishop Blakes is explaining exactly the red flags that I saw/felt. It was all about him and after 4 months he knew very little about me. Had no problem in connecting with other women and thought nothing of it. RC Blakes “He’s fundamentally programmed against relationships”. True words. He didn’t really want a real connection. He would try to reconnect and would turn on the charm like a faucet. I had to look at myself and realize that I was allowing it to happen. Kept thinking that maybe I had evaluated him too harshly. I finally saw what was going on and the penny dropped! Ended it. Thanks so much for your teachings. They are priceless. 🙏🏼
That COVERT was a charming ACADEMY AWARD WINNING PERFORMING DEMON! I LOST MYSELF, BUT I'M BACK THANK YOU LORD🙏🏿❤
❤️❤️❤️A LOT of the toxic relationships we jump into, they could've been avoided by simply TAKING OUR TIME to learn the person we are with, and also learning/evaluating their true intentions/character. Doesn't matter how healthy you are emotionally/mentally... IF you do not take your time with people, you will ALWAYS be misled by the mask they have on. They are professionals at creating the illusion of love and empathy. That illusion falls apart once we practice patience. So many of us jump into relationship so quickly because we don't want to lose a good thing. But with time, you'll usually find out that, your "good thing" was just a mirage. Deception can not out last time. When you meet new people, GIVE IT TIME... Even if that means being friends with them for 3-5 years before dating them.
@CL_P you said it right and said it well. Growing up i would hear the women in my family say " you get over one, by getting under one." And so I got off the porch and did just that. At 35 now, I've learned that, along with many other misguided lessons passed down generationally, that way ain't it. More importantly, it's not in alignment with my Creator's way. Like you said, much could've been avoided by simply taking our time. It's only by God's undeserved grace and mercy that I'm here today to salute your truth and to testify on my tests!!! You stepped on some toes, but your honesty and genuity was much needed. Take care🧡
@@EE-cr2uv Yes, you're right. So many bad lessons we have learned from bad advice from family and friends. I also agree... If it's not in the Lord's wisdom, we just shouldn't feed on what's given to us to digest. Like the verse says, "Let patience have her PERFECT work, that you may be entire wanting nothing."
Yup I always say give ppl time and you will figure out who they are
@@zh1408 Yeah, that's always true. Evil can't keep a smile up for too long lol
Exactly! I use to rush in, there are always some signs. The intuition tells us too. But we always looking for proof.
The one thing I learned after breaking free from a very traumatic relationship with a narcissist is to cut them off at the root. It is literally a dose of their own medicine.
Facts! 💯 Amen!
Please explain more. What does cutting at the root mean?
😳🤯
Just found out my friend of 30 years is a narcissist. On the day my cousin was killed by police, I confided in her. She turned around and shared good news about her family. No empathy.
Omg
Wow
Or ask you some kind of 'offthewall' question about the situation.
I had a friend like this. No empathy. I ghosted her completely
Wow
What part of you is so broken that you attract such individuals?
Thank you ‼️
I needed to hear that. 🎯 🎯
He said: "they are emotional chess players". ✔️
For sure…
Pastor, thank you for addressing this. In fact, a narcissist WILL expend a lot of effort getting to know all about you in the beginning so that they can use all of that information to mirror you and then love-bomb you into securing you as supply. The difference is that it isn't because they are truly interested in you; it is manipulation not genuine. Once you are 'secured' that's when the real self comes out and there is no time, energy or true interest displayed toward you any longer.
My ex kept the mask on for 3 full years... and lovebombed me the entire time. They adapt depending on who they’re with.
Yes ! This is my experience
I'm reminded of what my advisor in college told me, "trust your intuition, it's very powerful". Everything you have said confirmed what I knew, but questioned because of his celebrity. No doubt now, thank you. It is demonic. I heard someone say; the spirit is always preparing us, or protecting us. I give thanks to the MOST HIGH, for his continual protection.
These people also think they are better than other people also and they done no wrong in life. Always bragging on themselves. Needing help yes Lord
Dear God if I only received this wisdom 26 years ago! What makes it even worse is that they are completely delusional and clueless about their behavior. Keep the wisdom coming this way Bishop 🔥
.....or so they want you to think that!!
The one I married knows exactly what he is doing yet he still does wrong and lies every time his mouth opens
@CM - they are not clueless about their behavior. Which is why they try to Hoover you back, fake tears, crying. Cuz they know what they do- they just hoping YOU DON’T KNOW .. AND FIGURE THEM OUT.
I’m married to one and it has been by far the worst experience of my life
18 months listening to your words. Your message is always on spot and exactly what I need to hear at that moment. Thank you. ❤️
They use people like toy, inflict a lot of pain and, call you names , make you feel guilty, accept guilt when you are not at fault.They have a way of getting a good woman/man.Very draining
Lucifer was the first narcissist.. selfish - envious of God.. This was the beginning. It's as old as time.. My soon to be out book REFLECTIONS OF THE CURSE.. journey of a woman's heart.. explains it well.
Narcissist causes a lot of confusion in your mind.
Sad to say that I have dealt with more than one narcissist in my life . Needlessly to say, I have suffered tremendously, but to that same extend I have I have suffered, I have healed and grown.
It took me years to untangle myself from the web that kept me stuck in suffering from one unhealthy relationship to another one.
But one thing I did is that I worked on myself fearlessly and non-stop. Not only did I gathered information through many videos such as this one, read books, joined college as adult (studied psychology) but I also did the work of confronting my childhood issues.
From childhood neglect, to daddy issues, low self esteem, poor self image, I shed light on every dark corner of my soul.
Although we are never done with our inner growth, I can say for sure that I will not be allowing another narcissist into my life because I now have enough tools to protect myself.
Notice I used the word “allowing” not “ attracting “ as that is one of the things I learn from my therapist.
She said, “ We don’t attract this or that, as there is everything on the spectrum out there ; We allow them in because our weak boundaries ! “
And so I had to learn what I was not taught- that it is my clear and strong boundaries that will keep me safe.
Due to a very neglectful childhood, there was a lot of pain I needed to process. In particular, I walked around unconsciously looking for my daddy which caused my heart to be devour by the wrong men.
Also, my maladaptive survival response of “ fawning “ (the use of people-pleasing to diffuse conflict, feel more secure in relationships, and earn the approval of others) kept me in a vicious cycle with toxic people.
Boundaries did not all of a sudden fall from the sky. Before I was able to learn some healthy boundaries, I had to work hard at carving self love other than that , I felt “ too guilty “ for putting myself first.
And … most importantly, I needed to give up the addiction for the approval of others and regain my ability to have agency and stand alone.
I’m sharing this to say that healing is possible, as well as changing the things that are very ingrained within us, if only we put in the work and be consistent.
Thank you for your videos and specifically for your prayer. I received it. I cried, and I healed a little bit more . Amen 🙏
@bpassion4fashion thank you for sharing your experience. Your past and childhood mirrors mine. I am currently on my path of self love. Some days are better than others. I will use and implement some of your suggestions. It’s a rough journey as I never knew what it was to love myself. Thank you ❤
Thanks for sharing your testimony. I just left my narc of 5 years. I have peace but my life is in chaos because I only left with the clothes on my back. I know I need counseling and lots of prayer.
I totally agree with your message pastor.. I am currently in my first relationship with a narcissist.. going on 3 years 👎🏽. I want to bring for consideration the point that narcissist usually don’t come in the door showing their true self.. They are very good at disguise. Mine presented as a kind, soft spoken, sociable, friendly person. By the time I was able to see his narcissistic personality my heart and my feelings was involved. At that point I didn’t know what a narcissist was so I thought I had the power to change his ways with my love…but that was not possible. Now I want out and just pray that God helps me remove all this feelings from my heart so I can finally let go and stop accepting him back in my life. Please pray for me! And thank you for your message it was perfectly explained.
Here's two weeks after.
I hope you've been able to leave and not look back.
He'll definitely hover that's what they do but stand strong.
If you haven't left just yet, I pray you find the strength to walk away and never look back in Jesus name.
Very true love. I was caught up for five years. First I was like yes my soulmate then I began walking on eggshells in my own home to being scared of him. Please get out baby it only gets worse. He put me in the ER twice Mr. I NEVER hit women. I'm praying for you. I've been away from almost 2 years and he's in jail right now for a terroristic threat on me from a year ago. God is GOOD!🙏🏿❤
@@QueenRegal - thanks for your prayer. I know I’m time God will open a door for me.
@@triciasimone7 - I’m glad you was able to get out and regain your peace!! I’m sure God will help me. Appreciate your prayers 🙏🏽
Sounds like a soul tie sweetie. That's why it's so hard to leave. Go before the Lord and repent. Do some fasting & warfare and break the bond. It's demonic. I have been there. I will pray for your victory.
I can't wait to hear this segment bishop blakes! Set boundaries, know your worth, and let God take care of the rest! Keep us encouraged and uplifted! Blessings to you sir and Lady Blakes for being spiritual parents to us! ❤️ 😍 💖 🙌🏾 👏🏽
I was married to one. Was ready to divorce by tbt second month of marriage. I let him be the one to pull the trigger after 8 months when after taking 2 cross country trips he returned home and informed me he no longer wanted to be married so I just said okay. Got myself a lawyer and freed myself from that demon.
@@leoniechristine2347 praise God! I'm glad you have peace in your mind heart and spirit! 🙌🏾 🙌🏾 🙌🏾 🙌🏾
Why??
We learn it at home, it is modelled by our parents relationship, so we keep on choosing the same pattern in partners, unconsciously, till we wake up to it.
When we became conscious, no-one can play us no more .
I'm so glad you touch the other side, the person who allows it to happen.
That is the key .
Nothing happens to us, without our consent .
It is not only the narc, me too, the realization changed my life.🙂
I’ve been dating someone for 4 months now. We knew each other a long time ago, but recently came together. It occurred to me he could have been love bombing in the beginning, but I thought we were both just so grateful we found each other again. But the problems started coming with communication, then there were some signs of lack of empathy on occasions. Soon I started detecting gaslighting, and now he’s saying hurtful things. As the relationship progresses, as I push back and try to speak up and set boundaries, it seems to get worse. It seems like everyone is throwing around the word narcissist lately, so I hesitate to label, but this relationship isn’t feeling healthy. It’s so hard to know when to keep trying to fix, and when to walk away.
I met him and identified quickly something wasn't right. Yet still entertained him for two years?! Yes it's me.....met at a time of grieving both parents and being in a new city alone. I wanted so badly to see good and have the company. But God.....I washed my hands and took that lesson and moved forward.
bottom line: THANK YOU GOD that I was taught to love myself to the point where I have NEVER allowed and i am NOT EVER going to allow ANY male--naracissist, toxic, healthy, broken, or whatever--to snatch me off my throne, no matter how much I THINK I want him in my life.... I'd rather continue reigning alone! listening to this brother HELPS to keep me strong enough to stand my ground which results in me NOT going through a whole lot of...NONSENSE...that far too many women go through because they settle...and don't want to be alone. looking forward to receiving more strength from the next video. THANK YOU, BROTHER!!!!!
Narcissists steal your money.. Your identity.. Your creative ideas..
He was like a robot sometimes.....just cold.
Embarrassingly this video made me realize that I carry some narcissistic traits. Not all, but I had always thought my partner had more of these traits than I did, but I was wrong. I want to be different and do better and am prayerful about God transforming my heart.
I’ve noticed that most narcissistic people who have addictive behavior
They can't self soothe because there's no self.
My ex was an alcoholic
Mmmm this is interesting
My x narc not only is addicted to crack cocaine,but meth,sex, himself,and admiration
Drugs / drinking/ sex
Thank you so much for tackling this again. I'm trying to coparent with one now. It breaks my heart for my children.
You're absolutely correct about this being a spiritual issue, or rather lack thereof. When you have no belief in anything higher than yourself... No connection to God... Then there are no repercussions for your actions. This is a very dangerous person to give your love/life to.
I am currently getting out of a relationship and this man meets all and each of the criteria that RC Blakes mentioned in this video. The gas lighting, the manipulation, the controlling and worst part has always been when he wanted to come back he would have different empty promises he would act on 1 or 2 the most but then would go back to his normal self. I am very thankful that this time I have learned to say bye for good I have been no contact close to a month and it's hard because all his family loves me and I love them too but this man needs to be away from me. Lady's seek for God's strength. Love yourselves and keep your eyes open. Thank you bishop RC Blake's for your content. God bless you and your family.
Men go for the most beautiful they can get because it shows the world (in their eyes) that they are successful.
Clout chasers
Pastors must speak of this since it’s in the church and it’s evil among the members. I’m so thankful for tonight’s live
I am healing from a Narc
Some pastors are narcissists.
@@stephaniesanders830 I am very aware and if a Pastor never addresses it. He’s probably one big Narc
Bishop thank you so much for this much needed word!!! I’m still getting my life back on track from narcissistic abuse. Blessings to you and First Lady Lisa Blakes!!!!!
I just wanted say as Married Christian Man, I’m Married to a Narcissist. I’ve read Kingology 3x. I was a single father of a little Queen. Prior to meeting my wife. I feel for my daughter and myself. My EYES HAVE BEEN OPENED by this video, as do all your videos do about myself as a Man And King in Gods image. the Lord has been revealing it to me on a daily basis. I thank you for this.
I had to come back to review this lesson.Yall pray for me because I'm in the cycle of a narcissist relationship. Please pray for me.
Get out fast. No matter what. I had to run for my life...
@@etcwhateverI want to but I don't have the finance to leave. I only get SSI/DA. I know God is going to make a way for me. Please keep me in prayer.
@@teew1895 i will pray for you
Escape ❤
Thank you pastor. I have not heard of gaslighting as equivalent to driving a person completely nuts. I'm thankful for a protected mind and priceless peace of mind.
Everyone should be sharing this with their friends and family. It’s not just enough to watch for entertainment purposes. Your sharing might just save a life!
Let the truth be told Bishop Blakes..amen
51:30 Yep.
Being married to a narcissist is almost the worst thing in the world...only superceded by attempting to coparent with a narcissist. You can't keep subjecting yourself to their demons, trying to "save" them with love. Only God can heal them. In the meantime, they cause near irreparable damage.
Lifetime of narcissistic abuse. Its a nightmare 😔 😫 grateful to have been saved by God
Amen
Very very jealous of people that's more successful then them. So so sad
I was raised by one so it was the norm for me. I removed my father from my life but still didn’t know this abuse had a name so was doomed to repeat the cycle.
Then I was in a 10 year relationship with one that was identical to my Dad. By year 8 the penny started to drop that this was not normal behaviour. I binge watched TH-cam videos for 2 years, learning about it and retraining and resetting my childhood programming.
Then I built up a supportive social network in preparation for my escape so the hoovering would be unsuccessful.
Then I found RC Blake’s who became my surrogate father to teach me the way moving forward.
I’ve been narc free for 3 years now living in peaceful bliss.
I’ve been targeted by more since; but I can now spot them very quickly and it’s great training for asserting boundaries and removing them without drama.
That 10 year abusive relationship was hell but it was the key to unlock everything I didn’t know about my past and the lock to prevent any more from ever effecting my life again.
First kings 19 to 22
Word
Conversations I wish I had before getting married...its never too late though. Thanks Bishop,🙏🏽
Me, My, Mine sounds like a great read because the title is on point for a narcissist!
10 years with a nacrissistic 20 months free I m learning to love myself and heal
It's funny when one thinks it's "only them" going thru things and nobody understands. I'm married 24 yrs, SAW the red
flags🚩🚩 in the 90"s when we met, but honestly didn't know what a narcissist was. I don't think I heard this term until I was in my late 30's/+40'. I'm 50 now. I am exhausted. I am done. It's time for me to breathe.
When I left an abusive relationship with a narcissist I was with for 4 years. I had to move in with my sister until i was able to get on my feet again. It was like, I was basically dealing with him all over again just as my sister. Its sad when its your own family member. Im in a better place in life now and I keep my sister at a distance
Good evening Bishop RC. Thanks for revisiting this topic. I'm being hoovered by my ex narc-a relationship that ended 3mths ago. Thank God for being set free by the power of the Holy Spirit; with His (Holy spirit's) help I'm staying strong. Please address how survivors can resist the hoover. Thank you.
I’m beginning to think the hoovering is ongoing. Me and my ex split over and year and he’s still hoovering. I’ve had to block him from every social media site and from my phone. That still hasn’t stopped him. I’ve had my number for 13 years, I shouldn’t have to change it. They’re Miserable souls
This is me right here!
I've blocked him on all social platforms but he still travelled miles to see me.
I turned him back at my gate.
He's highly and extremely manipulative
@@likewhoa577 The Hoover doesn't stop because we put up with so much abuse. They think I'll get her back and she'll pay for making me work so hard to get her back. Been there done that! Every single time it was the unspeakable. Things I would Never tolerate! I had to move out of state to heal. It's really sad, but that DEMON is REAL! Be careful love🙏🏿❤
What I get from what you are saying is do not be unequally yoked to unbelievers. I've been delivered from narcissistic abuse but I keep myself in focused for future relationships. Thanks Pastor Blakes, you are my go to when info is needed. I highly recommend you. Be blessed and shalom, peace to you!
I finally found you, thank you Pastor for sharing your thoughts and experience 🙏
My Nex was a nightmare, I got stuck on his breadcrumbing. His physical abuse of me was awful and his constant texting other women and denying it….it was starting to get me down and I’m not that type of person. I broke free of him a few months ago and the relief is immense. Thank you for your lessons ❤️🙏
Cheers to new beginnings
How are you ?
Hope your safe 🙏
First I met a man who I knew wasn’t being his true self so I asked and observed until I saw the real him and that’s when I realized he was a narcissist. I never heard the term before. I thought I had the behavior down and then I met a covert narcissist and was blind sided. Now I feel like I just graduated from the Course on narcissism and I can hold my own class. But alas I still must be observant and not let my guard down.
Coverts are the worst.
They slither in under the radar. By the time you figure it out your in deep somehow if they have had their way. They go for the quick innocuous lock down to trap you.
Same story. He was covert as well but I thought I was secure in the relationship, that facade was perfection. Wrong! Now I can spot a narcissist 5 miles away. I thank God everyday for the lessons I learned by being in that relationship. Honor your boundaries, listen to your intuition, use wisdom and discernment.
Yea that COVERT something else!🤦🏿 The worst one!!!! NEVER AGAIN!
@@likewhoa577 WHAT ARE THE SIGNS OF SPRING A COVERT NARC THAT YOU LEARNED? PLEASE HELP US TO RECOGNIZE THE SIGNS. I'D LOVE TO GAIN THE KNOWLEDGE THEY YOUR EXPERIENCE. BLESSINGS!
I had a one year relationship with a covert one. I started being anxious and depressed. I left. Big lesson.
They will definitely drive you crazy!!!
Great points! I love you, but, you cannot love me like I deserve, so I'm leaving you Alone
I think I am a narcissit and i just pray that god takes this way so i can live pure and righteous and have some integrity and become a real man. please pray for me yall i was born again a while back but I fell off being as religious as i used to be being brought up in a Christian church-going family. i been messing up and i hope god forgive me for my sins..
So true. This subject needs to be kept in the forefront of our discussions. This might be able to spare many who are not yet in bondage with such people. We are about +/- 35 years late for our generation with these discussions but better later than never.
Thank you for your wisdom. Understanding these red flags is crucial and keeps our own selves in check from participating in such behaviors.
I’m so glad your talking about this again I’ve returned for the 6th time they say it takes 7-11 times to leave the situation. However I’ve learned God put me here to bring me through to break generational curses so I’m trusting the process, gaining and pulling what I need from this horrific experience so I can shut it down!!
amen sis! you talking to me!
have you heard of Nelson Shuman?He does deliverance teachings/ prayers on utube for this Blessings 🙏
Jeeeeeeeeeez…the 1st 5 times wasn’t enough??? 🤦🏽♀️
@@amerokeewiya1320 Judge not hunny! No, it wasn’t obviously because when God does a thing He will take you through every aspect of it and show you all of your weaknesses He will break you down to thrust you forward so pay attention and remember my name because the biggest part of all of it has been trusting the process no matter how painful or confusing. You judge and it’s ok because it’s not for anyone else to understand
I'm with ya girl!!! It took me about 7 times. It's been over a month. Trust God will carry us through this painful season. 🙏❤️❤️🤗
My most favorite and helpful mentor cant thank you enough for walking me out of an unhealthy relationship..was very hard to leave a situationship but much needed and now I am continuing to watch & keep my eyes open to recognize a Mans behavior!!
Thanks so much. The topic we have all been needing . We love you Pastor Blakes. I hope you and the 1st Lady Lisa have a beautifully blessed life🙏🙏🙏
I've been listening to you for awhile now. I love your content. I want to add this. I'm married to what I believe is one. There's two types. You have the one that is easy to spot because they draw the attention to themselves. However, the covert narcissist is the one that catches men. These are the ones who need a little help and viewed as being picked on. They show their low self esteem, and have an ability to disguise their intentions. You normally finds out the damage from your circle of peers. Example maybe they are irresponsible with money or children, but when they talk to others they will say it's you who are bad with money or the neglectful parent. They tear you down behind the scenes. Once again l love your content. Keep blessing ppl.
That make you feel bad about yourself and triggers. He tried it today. I embraced happiness even more 😊
I experienced it and it is the worst experience ever but I managed to walk away after 9 years.
yep I didn't want to believe it but this person no one can help .. they are angry bc I picked up on it . THEY CANT BE HELPED .
Those high on the narcissistic spectrum are too weak to become vulnerable to love or a genuine relationship.
I just wanted to THANK YOU for this content RC Blakes. Very powerful and informative because, I just recently by the grace of god had removed myself from a narcissistic woman. To be honest; still in the healing process but because of your words and god given knowledge. I can now prepare myself to see what is within me that attracts this type to me. This content was truly a blessing.
I am in the middle of a split
He is still in the home.
But now it is over god showed me after a lot of yrs. I feel so embarrassed god woke me up Thankyou pastor the pain is so bad.
Envious of the life that they fantasize about but yet they are utterly unable to sustain such.
My whole life has been destroyed by narcissist now I’m left to pick up all the pieces by myself my life has been a battle zone - i’m afraid to talk to any person pretty much because I feel like they’re either going to not like me because I have too much trauma or they’re going to be a toxic person that just going to use and abuse me all over again. It’s rough out here especially as a woman with no protection. - edit - I would like to add that I’m not just referring to romance relationships I’m talking about being born into a family of narcissist and not even realizing that you’re dating a narcissist because You were raised to be broken
Thank GOD. Thank GOD, for you pastor Blakes for speaking about this pertinent topic.❤❤🙏🙏 For I've learned a narcissistic individual usually will return Void, leaving one bankrupt!!
You are indeed an awesome teacher of the word of the most high. What I love most about how you convey scriptures. You use simplicity with our everyday life and where us at in scriptures that even a child can understand ! You dont do all the guivering of the voice , the hollowering and breathing all hard with the music in the background to sound all dramatic. You just keep it real and lay it out there. Thats what people need.