I like how you guys can reflect and admit you got married really young (early 20s). I’m only 25 and feel like I have only started becoming into myself now. I changed so much since my late teens and early twenties. Which is why a lot of long term relationships ended since I outgrew them. I still feel like I have so much work to do on myself so I don’t see myself settling down and having a family until at least 28.
Over 15 years ago I hosted a party with my husband. Many of our guests were Ghanaian and one man was sharing some of the truths he had learned about life. I think he was in his early 30's and he said his wife had left him some years earlier. He said it was the best thing that ever happened to the both of them. He said he was not a good husband and went over all the things he had done wrong and how childish he had been. He said after his wife left him he took a hard look in the mirror and set out to change his ways. I always remember his story, not because of what he said but more from the reactions of his peers. Many did not even listen to what he said and started bashing the wife. He must have said it was his fault 20 times but this fell on deaf ears. He added that he and his ex wife have since become friends and neither holds any ill feelings for the other anymore. Still this fell on deaf ears. Eventually he just stopped talking. Some people never see past their own fears and immaturity. No relationship starts out with wishes for divorce, but nonetheless it happens and sometimes it is needed. We mourn these relationships like deaths but just like after a death..WE MUST MOVE ON!! Dela, you are brave and I, along with many of your followers, offer you my support and continued prayers for your success and well being. I wish the same for Kwame. You both will heal in good time. God has a plan for each of us and just because our journeys are not the same we should not judge. WWJD?
Going Through (Divorce) Separation Now... I Can Relate.... 😭😭😭😭😭I'm At Work Now. Watching Your Priceless Emotionally Podcasts... Messianic Community's Loves You For Being Youself.... And, Speading The Unconditional Love Of (Jewish Yahushua) Jesus the Messiah With All Who's Had Enough and Hurting... Thank You, Thank You,, and Thank You.... Many Thank You's... African Queen and Awesomely Great Woman Of HaShem-GOD..... Be Back, Soon. To Share My Testimony... 😢 TTYL..... In Continuing Prosperity and Redemption, May Yahushua Messiah and HaShem-GOD Blesses You With Abrahamic Covenant ,and Your Children's, Children's, Children's To The Forth Generations With Generational Blessings 🙌 🙏🏾 ❤ 💖 😊 😀
My mom left my father in 1983 in small town Nigeria. It was tough for her raising us alone and got a lot of judgment. It was the best decision for her .Relationships grow or dissolve, its a part of life. Keep your head up!!
I can definitely see that you’re more happier now. No one can judge your experience until they walk in your shoes. Some people would rather stay in an unhappy marriage just to save face, which is sad. You only live once so enjoy your life.
I really enjoyed watching your Podcast. I am American Pakistan Muslim and my husband is Ghanian American Christian. We’ve been married for 13yrs. I was 21 when we got married and I 100% agree with you how we change so much in our relationship when we marry so young. I am glad whatever decision you made makes you a better and happier person now. Your happiness and your worth/value as a human being matters the most. Marriage is one of the hardest relationship to maintain. I’ve notice women in Ghana just accept so many wrong doings from their husband and don’t put themselves 1st. But in the West its not about gender its literally about individual’s happiness and life decision. People can have opinions but stay out of her Personal Life. I know one thing for sure no woman would just end her long term marriage just like that. She must had go through so much trauma, sufferings to make such decisions. ❤❤❤❤❤always love and best wishes from you, Dela ❤😊
I think a lot of audiences or content consumers in our modern-day type of media are used to the traditional way of media where everything is acted out or well scripted, so they often forget that in this modern era of youtube, tik tok, vlogs, etc. most of it is full of real human beings who are being extremely vulnerable by living their lives through the lens of a camera for any or everyone to see. And I know some will say that's their choice, but before you do, have some empathy in your heart and realize that these people feel pain, love, laughter, sadness, fear, cry, and every other legit emotion God created within a human being. Hats off to you for being vulnerable with this channel and still managing life events with your audience. Charlie, I salute you for choosing you, choosing growth, and still choosing to enlighten some of your audience along your journey. You are doing God's work and God bless you and the family. Love wins!
Staying in a relationship that will go nowhere is self abuse. As a Jamaican who has been divorced for many years, I can tell you I am happier than i ever was. I’m also a mother of six wonderful professional children who have a great relationship with their father, and, of course, I always encouraged that. Live your lives, care for the children, and don’t neglect your own self care. Just “do you!”
I like the relationships subject podcast endeavor. It's going to be beneficial in the long run and it's long overdue. As African people, I don't think we do a good job of passing information down to our sons/daughters when it comes to this area of life. We send them off to the best schooling or just school in general and think we've done our job.
Great topic. Many of us project our fears an worries onto others when things like this happens. When we don't know the reason or circumstances, it's easy to look at the videos and imagine everyone being happy off camera. Being on TH-cam with my husband and family I couldn't help but imagine if something similar happened to me, how I would handle it, how devastated I would feel, etc. Most married couples don't air their problems so people just assume that the relationship is a good one at all times. People also tend to look up to those in long marriages and aspire to be like them, so it can be disappointment when you realize the relationship wasn't one you should aspire to imitate. Thank you for sharing Dela. My husband and I have been following you for 3 years and were inspired a lot by what you and your family shared with us. Whatever happened I just pray that you and your family are healthy and happy.
Thanks for being vulnerable to share! There will still be those that think they know best, but live your life on your terms because at the end of the day it's knowing you did whats in the best interest of you and your kids.
Supper happy and proud of you Dela, this world is full of opinions (good or bad) but I’m glad you chose to do what will make you happy, you’ve handled this situation so well, no matter what you do people will have something to say about it. Love and blessings ❤
Dela, remember you are a role model to your daughter in particular. You showed her it is not right to stay in an abusive or toxic relationship. In my opinion you did the right thing. That is also part of the reason I left a marriage of 20 years. I wanted to show my girls that it was the right thing. They witnessed so much abuse so it was the right decision. It is well.
This topic hits back when you have a kid that gets into such a dilemma during teen years. There's no right or wrong way to deal with it. We learn and grow as we know how.
The way this topic needs to be discussed socially. It’s a lot of 🇬🇭 in marriages they are not happy in and it’s time we discuss a persons happiness over being miserable in a marriage.
In marriage, you need be careful what you tell your single mother friends because, it could lead to bad advice to leave your partner. Always turn to God for direction and guidance. I wish you the best Dela❤
Dela, you have to remember, you and Kwame came to us as a package deal. He was your camera man, who always chimed in during all of your videos. So it was obvious to viewers that Kwame was missing, and that was not "normal". Viewers simply wanted to know what was going on. And yes, we were hurt when you confirmed that a separation had occurred.
I was sad not 'hurt', sad for the family. The children in my mind firstly, then Dela and Kwame because we don't know the details about what occurred (why should we? that is none of the publics business) All I pray for is an amicable parenting relationship and amicable divorce
I agree that’s why I did the video but it has come to light that a lot of people are suffering in a similar situation and that is why the podcast is important to me.
Natural Ghana girl, You don't need to explain anything to us, you made an announcement, and that's it! I when through a divorce with five children! I had an 18-month-old baby my husband walked out! But let me tell you, something shit happens, and no one knows your pain! I was young, about 31, and I prayed. I only had my mom to help me, living in the USA 🇺🇲 The same man who left returned after ten years to ask for forgiveness! It's now all 41 years; the children are grown! I am in my fifty, and life has gotten much better! We were young too! Sweetheart, live to the fullest and enjoy fine your passion. I know you feel free! I can tell you how that feels! Yes, the children, but you as a person come first. Don't worry. You are blessed. It's your time now, and no one must tell you how and what! Be happy god will work things out in due time! What to be will! God does something to make way. I love 💕 you as a mother, and I understand! Thank you for sharing shalom
I didn't notice before but I see now that there are a lot of people judging you for your decision. I don't know how people can do that without knowing the details of your marriage. Anyway glad you're moving forward
WOW! This was a GREAT podcast show. I am from America and the best way for me to be strong is to continue to carry on as if nothing happened, and it works for me. Your guest was brilliant and she should be a regular in your podcast. Look at you Ghana girl, the world is in your hands ♥️
Gosh some of the comments still on here are just so judgemental and still making assumptions. I am annoyed reading them. What I believe is that God knows your heart, he loves you and your family, including the father of your children. He is with you all every step of the way. It’s great to talk and share, so thank you. Your followers who are wise and kind pray for the best for you. Lovely to see you smiling and doing well. Congratulations on your 40k following 🙌🏾❤️💋🙏🏽
Congrats for 40k subs. I was championing for 50k before end of 2022...Happy to see progress made. I'm positive 2023 will be a great year for you and your family and in every aspect of your life. Keep up with the good work. On the topic under discussion, I wish you well. You need to be happy. Ignore all those judging your decision. You owe no one any explanations. I wish you well.
Obaa Pa Dela, Live life . Remember the advise when u get on an airplane. In case of an emergency put on your mask before u help others. Such is life. Unless u live a life u can "breath ur oxygen" u cannot in any way help others even your children. I enjoy your shows because u are being real and yourself. Jah bless and keep doing you!
Our Creator does not want any of us to live unhappily. Do not settle for less than the full experience humans incarnated on earth to experience. Stay vibrating high💫❤️🌍
I can see your happiness in the face clothing, plus you smile more, and conversation is more buoyant! I am happy for you, and it's your choice! No use being miserable because no one knows your pain! This was a perfect topic. Thanks for sharing shalom
An interesting topic and needs to be discussed more. Many of our decisions as women are done because of what people will say and what we perceive to be culturally and religiously right rather than what is best for us. I applaud you for being authentic.
You have done what is best for you. You cannot sacrifice your life and be unhappy. you are managing this in the right way. Your Children will respect you in future. Stay focused
4 million plus Americans are Living Apart Together (LAT). Google it up. In Ghana, the Ga ethnic group lean towards LAT. My father's house, my mother's house. Doesn't work for every situation, but that option is also becoming the norm for others.
Most of your subscribers are curious as to what happened, including myself but you don’t owe us an explanation. Life is too short to live miserable and unhappy. You’re not the first and you won’t be last to go through this .Time as they say heals. Much Love
Mate! is my first time hearing your separation to be frank am shock sister, not sure if i have to go to look the video for the reason why, but if was not big issue than every thing could be solved. Just be positive and enjoy the kids life is very bloody short, i always see you happy even here with my other crazy sister Rochelle
Thank you for sharing your journey. Please note that your experience can be particular to you. Your statement that one should not get married below 30 is misplaced. I got married at 23 and 30 years later, I'm still married. Life is a journey and we are always growing so there is no age on when one is ready to be married. Just my two cents worth.
West African societies are comfortable with men having the "upper hand" and divorced women could be seen as some as a threat to the defenseless and dependent woman.
OMG so many thoughts first of all congratulations on finally hitting 40 K subscribers you’re getting there Hun, as for your ex I get that you toes to end the marriage, but that doesn’t mean he should walk away from his children after all he has three sons he needs a father figure. Obviously it’s hard when a long marriage ends and I’m hoping he still tries to maintain access with your children, because if he doesn’t that is shocking to me even if he has moved back to the UK he can still come and see them or vice versa. I’m so glad you have a friend like Rachelle in your life everyone needs a woman like her to keep them grounded a strong woman in a little body she is amazing. Keep moving forward della you definitely seem happier brighter and a better version of yourself. Loving the podcast can’t wait for the next one.
Agree with all of this. I hope change occurs over time and we can accept people's individual opinions and support as much as well are able to their desires.
I honestly had NO IDEA until I watched THIS Podcast 😮😢 Well CONGRATS for you making the decision that is BEST for your health and well-being!! I sadly have to admit that I think I understand how women reach this point. But that’s all I’ll say for now. PEACE & BLESSINGS TO YOU AND THE FAMILY
It's true about how people flex different on not knowing how to approach, it's so silly but understandable (took me a while to see that it's understandable, because I opened my mind through the process). I got divorced and so many very close people acted ways, needless to say I let them be and no longer par with them because it's a waste of time. How can we have been so cool and then divorce happens and you say, "oh I didn't know how to approach you." This is serious kwasiasem. The real ones who were and are meant to be in my life kept it 100 for both sides and are still in my life and the bonds have gotten stronger. Divorce sucks seriously and even more with children, but you have options for a great life ahead and divorce definitely is not a life sentenced to misery, learn from it all, grow and be amazing for you first and then the kids. You done know when you are proper then the fam will be as well, some think its selfish but who cares. F@UK what other people think or say. Just my two cents from someone with the same experience in "the west" folks are still on the dumbness. A friend gave me amazing advice and said, "you have a clean slate now and can do whatever you want, use your energy to be greater than you have ever been."
We've not heard Kwame's side of the story. This is just a one-sided chatter. People may cease to be sympathetic if Kwame decides to come out with his side of the story. Remember there are always three sides to a story : Your side, my side and the unadulterated truth.
This podcast option is different but I like it more !! For another episode....maybe have a discussion on how you move on....are you dating ...or have another discussion with Rochelle....as she has been divorced longer...is she dating or content with staying single?!?!
Sister. Your new direction is a good one. And I've enjoyed watching your content. Sorry to hear about your divorce. 24 to 30 is a good age to marry. So you were actually in tolerance. This new direction of yours is going to be a learning curve for you. I hope you are open to your ideas being challenged? African ideas of marriage are very traditional (Marriage for life). White Western ideas of marriage is divorce if you are not happy. Maybe you are a Western woman in Ghana. A fish out of water. Only you can answer that. Passport bros are leaving Western countries for Africa/South America/Asia for life long wives. When Western men travel for wives we have to be very careful to leave our Western mindsets in the West for fear of contaminating the community we travel to with our Western ideas of personal happiness over family and community cohesion. Men find that hard. Some things are better left in the West. Glad to have a full frank conversation though. Modern woman vs traditional woman. Modern men vs traditional men Let's go Lol😂
In Ghana, divorce isn't a new thing. There is a proverb in Akan language that's says, if you fear divorce, you'll never get good marriage. It's obvious they will try to talk you out of it but in some cases, they will back you. There are many tribes who have different views on marriage so...
There’s soo much debates regarding many aspects of relationships and people want to learn to help there own situations. So when you have your relationships on social media than people want to hear the content
It’s surprising to hear but you have to do what’s best for YOU!!!! Do what makes you happy You know what you went through so let that be More people need to make that decision but just don’t
Possible topics to discuss; Sexism is Ghana (girls & education, women & politics, women and devision making in the home etc) Ageism in Ghana Religion/no religion in Ghana People trafficking through Ghana Fake foreign 'visa connections in Ghana' Do NGOs always have a positive influence in Ghana? There are loads you can discuss
Most Ghana men date diaspora women for visa or in hopes to get that. Women rely a lot on men so the men always stay on top. It's a society of men being respected unlike the west. So it will take some time to solve these issues.
Some food for thought! There are values and standards in life including rules. We can agree with these and subscribe to having them or not and each decision has its pros and cons. Nothing is perfect in life for life it’s not perfect including marriage. It’s a lifelong journey worthy of pursuit. If infidelity is involved in marriage, the Bible does weigh in on that. All the best…
This was amazing, Ghanaians get divorced all the time lol so I don’t get this Gh culture thing it’s there in every culture has it where they want couples to stay together and grin and bare it
hey Dela 👋🏿 it was nice meeting you last week at the Black Star Line Festival, the Jamaican living in Ghana, I've been watching your shows since 2020 when I was in the UKKK, love your shows, you are so down to earth and a real Natural Ghana Girl, never change. I was sad about the situation too but seeing you now so happy and how you shared your story, I am happy for you! Hope to buck up on you again (as we say in Jamaica 🇯🇲😃) by the way you are doing well and I can see you being a serial entrepreneur! 🇬🇭
Hey! Yes it was really nice to meet. I’m sure we will meet again, Ghana is so small. If you ever feel like sharing your story about your journey here send me an email and we’ll make it happen 😊
The older generation got divorced a lot, some never married but they project their 'failures' on their children's relationship and would rather have them stick it out 'to save face' Yes when there are chln involved work as hard as possible toresolve. We are humans not divine. If someone won't budge or compromise, whatis the appropriate number of years to give chances and work it out. They ve been married for 20 ish years. This issue might have been 10 years in the making. We dont know. Is it fair to have children in a household that is constantly tensed, parents arguing, being disrepectful to each other etc? Or are we advocating for individuals to be 'doormats' , to keep taking what they can't bear, till the other person decides to compromise no matter how long it takes?
I didn’t know, l thought he just went behind the scenes like most do, I don’t read too much into other people’s stuff. You can’t interpret anything that you don’t even understand!
I love this for you Dela. I’ll be in ghana in 6 months please make room for me on your podcast ooooo. This conversation is amazing and soooo needed. Lots of learns and growth. Love you hun ❤ and i will take you out to lunch too when i come to ghana lol
I disagree on people setting the perfect age for marriage at 30. There are no statistics that prove getting married older makes for happier long lasting relationships those are just opinions. Married since I was 20 we're now 40 and still happily married. Not only that most men marry to build a legacy meaning children and if he intends to have a lot of children starting at 30 is too late. Geriatric pregnancy starts at age 35 so you will have to rush through getting pregnant to lower your risk. Also women waiting until 30 to settle down tends to have a lot of male relationships meaning more baggage and trauma by the time they're 30 it's harder for them to pair bond as they are usually tainted by all the bad men they have encountered. Stats have shown women with a lower body count tend to be happier in long term marriages. Stats also show for black women if you're not married by age 35 you are most likely to never be married. Advising them to wait that long is almost setting them up to be a baby mama.
I would not recommend that women wait to get married at or after thirty, I think it's too late...For men its fine, but women have to fight biology, especially if they plan to have more than one child. Also, when they finally think they're ready for marriage after thirty, there's no guarantee they will automatically find the 'right' man, it may take years. Thanks for sharing such a sensitive topic, I know it wasn't easy.
@@mariam9977 I never said, they couldn't have babies later on, but that they have to deal with biology. Surely you know, the older a woman gets, the more complications they are likely to have. The older a woman gets, the less fertile they are and the less eggs they produce, ....then odds of birth defects increases with age as well...this is why you should not encourage women to have babies late in life "especially" in their 40's.
Don’t listen to these non-doctors. Every woman is different. They are just fear-mongering to make women panic and settle for men who aren’t worth their time and can’t even afford to raise a family. ❤️💫🌍
Dela, you don't just sound happier you look like a caterpillar who's emerged like a butterfly from its cocoon. I think that may confirm you weren't really happy in that marriage at all and perhaps the same for him. It's just a shame people can't be a little more braver and be upfront with their partner and say how they're feeling. I know its difficult to hear someone says they no longer want to be in a relationship and its hard to say that to someone also, it's a tricky and difficult situation.
Hi Dela, i'd really wish you both gave us some advice and truths about dating and marriage ,especially your younger audience. So far my take from the conversation is not to make marriage decisions too early in life and I hope we all learn from it. I'm hoping to hear from you -Ewoenam Honu
This is why I don't accept invitations from 20 plus year olds for their wedding. i'll tell them " Go find yourself and leave marrage alone until you know who you are". Ladies' Women don't run from goodness". Only you know what your limits are so if getting divorce is what you needed then to heck with what people thinks Too many people stay in "bondage "marriages and miserable or pretending to the outside world that they are happy when those who know them are wondering why they staying together.
I really like this Podcast format. I'm new here, I started watching your videos a little while ago and I like your personality and your smile. 🥰 I liked all the interviews, but not this one. 😑 Rochel's whole vibe and attitude towards a subject as delicate as this one was strange. I don't know why you opted for divorce (and I don't need to know), but I think and hope it was something completely opposite of your friend here. Rochelle divorce and left her husband (and children) and went after a "dream/career" in a country far away. ▪︎ Would you have your teeth treated by a toothless professional with bad breath? ▪︎ 🤔 The lesson I draw from this interview is: Be careful with which friend you share certain challenges in life. If it's about marriage let me go to someone who has a good testimony (even though she is divorced), and has faith in marriage and family. Be blessed, New sub
My honest thoughts: 1: don’t talk about the divorce you might have get over it but am not sure about de children and kwame. Some gestures hurt for those who cares. 2: Rochelle shouldn’t have guess dela is not going to have a healthy relationship with her family anytime soon, I don’t see her as a family person 3: marrying at 25 is not young and looking back kwame was also 18 yrs younger that’s not an excuse. You can say u were naive but not young. Peace stay bless ❤
I like how you guys can reflect and admit you got married really young (early 20s). I’m only 25 and feel like I have only started becoming into myself now. I changed so much since my late teens and early twenties. Which is why a lot of long term relationships ended since I outgrew them.
I still feel like I have so much work to do on myself so I don’t see myself settling down and having a family until at least 28.
Over 15 years ago I hosted a party with my husband. Many of our guests were Ghanaian and one man was sharing some of the truths he had learned about life. I think he was in his early 30's and he said his wife had left him some years earlier. He said it was the best thing that ever happened to the both of them. He said he was not a good husband and went over all the things he had done wrong and how childish he had been. He said after his wife left him he took a hard look in the mirror and set out to change his ways. I always remember his story, not because of what he said but more from the reactions of his peers. Many did not even listen to what he said and started bashing the wife. He must have said it was his fault 20 times but this fell on deaf ears. He added that he and his ex wife have since become friends and neither holds any ill feelings for the other anymore. Still this fell on deaf ears. Eventually he just stopped talking. Some people never see past their own fears and immaturity. No relationship starts out with wishes for divorce, but nonetheless it happens and sometimes it is needed. We mourn these relationships like deaths but just like after a death..WE MUST MOVE ON!! Dela, you are brave and I, along with many of your followers, offer you my support and continued prayers for your success and well being. I wish the same for Kwame. You both will heal in good time. God has a plan for each of us and just because our journeys are not the same we should not judge. WWJD?
Wow, someone like that I need on my show. He would be great to speak to.
Going Through (Divorce) Separation Now... I Can Relate.... 😭😭😭😭😭I'm At Work Now. Watching Your Priceless Emotionally Podcasts... Messianic Community's Loves You For Being Youself.... And, Speading The Unconditional Love Of (Jewish Yahushua) Jesus the Messiah With All Who's Had Enough and Hurting... Thank You, Thank You,, and Thank You.... Many Thank You's... African Queen and Awesomely Great Woman Of HaShem-GOD..... Be Back, Soon. To Share My Testimony... 😢 TTYL.....
In Continuing Prosperity and Redemption, May Yahushua Messiah and HaShem-GOD Blesses You With Abrahamic Covenant ,and Your Children's, Children's, Children's To The Forth Generations With Generational Blessings 🙌 🙏🏾 ❤ 💖 😊 😀
That was really deep …. 🤝🙏
My mom left my father in 1983 in small town Nigeria. It was tough for her raising us alone and got a lot of judgment. It was the best decision for her .Relationships grow or dissolve, its a part of life.
Keep your head up!!
I can definitely see that you’re more happier now. No one can judge your experience until they walk in your shoes. Some people would rather stay in an unhappy marriage just to save face, which is sad. You only live once so enjoy your life.
I really enjoyed watching your Podcast. I am American Pakistan Muslim and my husband is Ghanian American Christian. We’ve been married for 13yrs. I was 21 when we got married and I 100% agree with you how we change so much in our relationship when we marry so young. I am glad whatever decision you made makes you a better and happier person now. Your happiness and your worth/value as a human being matters the most.
Marriage is one of the hardest relationship to maintain. I’ve notice women in Ghana just accept so many wrong doings from their husband and don’t put themselves 1st. But in the West its not about gender its literally about individual’s happiness and life decision. People can have opinions but stay out of her Personal Life.
I know one thing for sure no woman would just end her long term marriage just like that. She must had go through so much trauma, sufferings to make such decisions.
❤❤❤❤❤always love and best wishes from you, Dela ❤😊
Thank you! Exactly, no one gets up and walks away for no good reason.
I think a lot of audiences or content consumers in our modern-day type of media are used to the traditional way of media where everything is acted out or well scripted, so they often forget that in this modern era of youtube, tik tok, vlogs, etc. most of it is full of real human beings who are being extremely vulnerable by living their lives through the lens of a camera for any or everyone to see. And I know some will say that's their choice, but before you do, have some empathy in your heart and realize that these people feel pain, love, laughter, sadness, fear, cry, and every other legit emotion God created within a human being. Hats off to you for being vulnerable with this channel and still managing life events with your audience. Charlie, I salute you for choosing you, choosing growth, and still choosing to enlighten some of your audience along your journey. You are doing God's work and God bless you and the family. Love wins!
Thank you 🙏🏾
Great material and your right....thank God life does move on. God Bless 💗
Staying in a relationship that will go nowhere is self abuse. As a Jamaican who has been divorced for many years, I can tell you I am happier than i ever was. I’m also a mother of six wonderful professional children who have a great relationship with their father, and, of course, I always encouraged that. Live your lives, care for the children, and don’t neglect your own self care. Just “do you!”
Rochelle is GREAT friend. This podcast is good.
Someone in the comments said stick it out unless there was abuse. We easily forget physical abuse isn't the only kind of abuse there is.
Exactly
Money is the biggest power control in a relationship always have own money as a back up
Dela you've done what's right for you and your children, period. Ignore the negative comments.
Dela, I like this format; please do more podcasts covering different subjects: relationships, life in Ghana, children and culture 💕
I like the relationships subject podcast endeavor. It's going to be beneficial in the long run and it's long overdue. As African people, I don't think we do a good job of passing information down to our sons/daughters when it comes to this area of life. We send them off to the best schooling or just school in general and think we've done our job.
Great topic. Many of us project our fears an worries onto others when things like this happens. When we don't know the reason or circumstances, it's easy to look at the videos and imagine everyone being happy off camera. Being on TH-cam with my husband and family I couldn't help but imagine if something similar happened to me, how I would handle it, how devastated I would feel, etc. Most married couples don't air their problems so people just assume that the relationship is a good one at all times. People also tend to look up to those in long marriages and aspire to be like them, so it can be disappointment when you realize the relationship wasn't one you should aspire to imitate.
Thank you for sharing Dela. My husband and I have been following you for 3 years and were inspired a lot by what you and your family shared with us. Whatever happened I just pray that you and your family are healthy and happy.
Thank you 🙏🏾
Thanks for being vulnerable to share! There will still be those that think they know best, but live your life on your terms because at the end of the day it's knowing you did whats in the best interest of you and your kids.
Supper happy and proud of you Dela, this world is full of opinions (good or bad) but I’m glad you chose to do what will make you happy, you’ve handled this situation so well, no matter what you do people will have something to say about it. Love and blessings ❤
Great conversation ladies ..you healed so let go... let misery keep misery company obviously you living happy ..people 😂
Dela, remember you are a role model to your daughter in particular. You showed her it is not right to stay in an abusive or toxic relationship. In my opinion you did the right thing. That is also part of the reason I left a marriage of 20 years. I wanted to show my girls that it was the right thing. They witnessed so much abuse so it was the right decision. It is well.
This topic hits back when you have a kid that gets into such a dilemma during teen years. There's no right or wrong way to deal with it. We learn and grow as we know how.
The way this topic needs to be discussed socially. It’s a lot of 🇬🇭 in marriages they are not happy in and it’s time we discuss a persons happiness over being miserable in a marriage.
I agree
The most high God will be done!❤️🙏🏽
Go on...two strong women... Just be happy better times ahead.
Dr Bill 🇬🇧
Hi Dela & Rochelle great topic.Happy 😁
All l know is, you look happier. ❤️
Happy New Year!!🥰
Happy new year and thank you!!!
Congrats on 40K. Great topic.
Thank you
In marriage, you need be careful what you tell your single mother friends because, it could lead to bad advice to leave your partner. Always turn to God for direction and guidance. I wish you the best Dela❤
Thank you
Dela, you have to remember, you and Kwame came to us as a package deal. He was your camera man, who always chimed in during all of your videos. So it was obvious to viewers that Kwame was missing, and that was not "normal". Viewers simply wanted to know what was going on. And yes, we were hurt when you confirmed that a separation had occurred.
Get over it. Like her. ❤️💫🌍
I was sad not 'hurt', sad for the family. The children in my mind firstly, then Dela and Kwame because we don't know the details about what occurred (why should we? that is none of the publics business)
All I pray for is an amicable parenting relationship and amicable divorce
I agree that’s why I did the video but it has come to light that a lot of people are suffering in a similar situation and that is why the podcast is important to me.
Natural Ghana girl, You don't need to explain anything to us, you made an announcement, and that's it! I when through a divorce with five children! I had an 18-month-old baby my husband walked out! But let me tell you, something shit happens, and no one knows your pain! I was young, about 31, and I prayed. I only had my mom to help me, living in the USA 🇺🇲
The same man who left returned after ten years to ask for forgiveness! It's now all 41 years; the children are grown! I am in my fifty, and life has gotten much better! We were young too! Sweetheart, live to the fullest and enjoy fine your passion. I know you feel free! I can tell you how that feels! Yes, the children, but you as a person come first. Don't worry. You are blessed. It's your time now, and no one must tell you how and what! Be happy god will work things out in due time! What to be will! God does something to make way. I love 💕 you as a mother, and I understand! Thank you for sharing shalom
@@moretodela That so true
Is the first step.thanksyou!!!
Girl's these podcasts are great. Love it
Thank you 🙏🏾
Dela is so open and genuine - it’s refreshing. I’ve been watching Rochelle for years and she’s never been open with her subscribers.
I guess not everyone wants to open up their whole life. We get judged very harshly when we do. But thank you for recognising it 🙏🏾
I didn't notice before but I see now that there are a lot of people judging you for your decision. I don't know how people can do that without knowing the details of your marriage. Anyway glad you're moving forward
WOW! This was a GREAT podcast show. I am from America and the best way for me to be strong is to continue to carry on as if nothing happened, and it works for me. Your guest was brilliant and she should be a regular in your podcast. Look at you Ghana girl, the world is in your hands ♥️
😊
Congratulations on 40K subscribers ❤
Thank you!!!
Gosh some of the comments still on here are just so judgemental and still making assumptions. I am annoyed reading them.
What I believe is that God knows your heart, he loves you and your family, including the father of your children. He is with you all every step of the way. It’s great to talk and share, so thank you. Your followers who are wise and kind pray for the best for you. Lovely to see you smiling and doing well. Congratulations on your 40k following 🙌🏾❤️💋🙏🏽
Thank you
Marriage couples some times in life grow apart
Congrats for 40k subs. I was championing for 50k before end of 2022...Happy to see progress made. I'm positive 2023 will be a great year for you and your family and in every aspect of your life. Keep up with the good work.
On the topic under discussion, I wish you well. You need to be happy. Ignore all those judging your decision. You owe no one any explanations. I wish you well.
Thank you
I enjoyed the podcast it was great seeing you in a different dimension, being open and real.
Great video I’m sure this helped someone. I agree with you don’t stay if you are miserable. 💯
Obaa Pa Dela, Live life . Remember the advise when u get on an airplane. In case of an emergency put on your mask before u help others. Such is life. Unless u live a life u can "breath ur oxygen" u cannot in any way help others even your children. I enjoy your shows because u are being real and yourself. Jah bless and keep doing you!
Very true
I love this.. wanna hear more. Thank you for being real with this difficult conversation😘
Why i love these two women 😀😘
Our Creator does not want any of us to live unhappily. Do not settle for less than the full experience humans incarnated on earth to experience. Stay vibrating high💫❤️🌍
I can see your happiness in the face clothing, plus you smile more, and conversation is more buoyant! I am happy for you, and it's your choice! No use being miserable because no one knows your pain! This was a perfect topic. Thanks for sharing shalom
An interesting topic and needs to be discussed more. Many of our decisions as women are done because of what people will say and what we perceive to be culturally and religiously right rather than what is best for us. I applaud you for being authentic.
Thank you
You have done what is best for you. You cannot sacrifice your life and be unhappy. you are managing this in the right way.
Your Children will respect you in future. Stay focused
Well done on this podcast. You look happy Dela, keep going keep doing you. Only God can judge ❤🙏🏾
4 million plus Americans are Living Apart Together (LAT). Google it up.
In Ghana, the Ga ethnic group lean towards LAT. My father's house, my mother's house.
Doesn't work for every situation, but that option is also becoming the norm for others.
That’s so sad, living apart together. A perfect phrase
Most of your subscribers are curious as to what happened, including myself but you don’t owe us an explanation. Life is too short to live miserable and unhappy. You’re not the first and you won’t be last to go through this .Time as they say heals. Much Love
Mate! is my first time hearing your separation to be frank am shock sister, not sure if i have to go to look the video for the reason why, but if was not big issue than every thing could be solved.
Just be positive and enjoy the kids life is very bloody short, i always see you happy even here with my other crazy sister Rochelle
Hahaha you’ve been skipping my videos huh? Lol I’m fine about it and the children are fine too
Well done ladies
Your very brave and strong ladies. It’s healing to talk about it. Well done. ❤❤
What?! Love this podcast 🙌🏽
Great conversation 👌🏿. Congratulations on hitting 40k we keep moving 👏🏿
Thank you 🙏🏾
Congrats on 40k ❤️
No one wants Divorce when you marry the person you love, but sometimes it's necessary. If you're not happy or safe, Divorce 💞💞...
Thank you for sharing your journey. Please note that your experience can be particular to you. Your statement that one should not get married below 30 is misplaced. I got married at 23 and 30 years later, I'm still married. Life is a journey and we are always growing so there is no age on when one is ready to be married. Just my two cents worth.
West African societies are comfortable with men having the "upper hand" and divorced women could be seen as some as a threat to the defenseless and dependent woman.
Keep up the good work 🤜♥️
OMG so many thoughts first of all congratulations on finally hitting 40 K subscribers you’re getting there Hun, as for your ex I get that you toes to end the marriage, but that doesn’t mean he should walk away from his children after all he has three sons he needs a father figure. Obviously it’s hard when a long marriage ends and I’m hoping he still tries to maintain access with your children, because if he doesn’t that is shocking to me even if he has moved back to the UK he can still come and see them or vice versa. I’m so glad you have a friend like Rachelle in your life everyone needs a woman like her to keep them grounded a strong woman in a little body she is amazing. Keep moving forward della you definitely seem happier brighter and a better version of yourself. Loving the podcast can’t wait for the next one.
Thank you 😊
I like the 📹 video quality 👌
Thank you, we are trying
Dela you look very happy. It’s incredible when weight is lifted off your shoulders. I’ll send you an email. ❤️
Agree with all of this. I hope change occurs over time and we can accept people's individual opinions and support as much as well are able to their desires.
I honestly had NO IDEA until I watched THIS Podcast 😮😢 Well CONGRATS for you making the decision that is BEST for your health and well-being!! I sadly have to admit that I think I understand how women reach this point. But that’s all I’ll say for now. PEACE & BLESSINGS TO YOU AND THE FAMILY
Thank you
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Birds of the same feathers,lo!
Great conversations
It's true about how people flex different on not knowing how to approach, it's so silly but understandable (took me a while to see that it's understandable, because I opened my mind through the process). I got divorced and so many very close people acted ways, needless to say I let them be and no longer par with them because it's a waste of time. How can we have been so cool and then divorce happens and you say, "oh I didn't know how to approach you." This is serious kwasiasem. The real ones who were and are meant to be in my life kept it 100 for both sides and are still in my life and the bonds have gotten stronger. Divorce sucks seriously and even more with children, but you have options for a great life ahead and divorce definitely is not a life sentenced to misery, learn from it all, grow and be amazing for you first and then the kids. You done know when you are proper then the fam will be as well, some think its selfish but who cares. F@UK what other people think or say. Just my two cents from someone with the same experience in "the west" folks are still on the dumbness. A friend gave me amazing advice and said, "you have a clean slate now and can do whatever you want, use your energy to be greater than you have ever been."
I love that advice. The “real” ones will always show themselves.
We've not heard Kwame's side of the story. This is just a one-sided chatter. People may cease to be sympathetic if Kwame decides to come out with his side of the story. Remember there are always three sides to a story : Your side, my side and the unadulterated truth.
This podcast option is different but I like it more !! For another episode....maybe have a discussion on how you move on....are you dating ...or have another discussion with Rochelle....as she has been divorced longer...is she dating or content with staying single?!?!
Lots more to come, that I can say!
Another great video 🎉
Sister. Your new direction is a good one. And I've enjoyed watching your content. Sorry to hear about your divorce.
24 to 30 is a good age to marry. So you were actually in tolerance.
This new direction of yours is going to be a learning curve for you. I hope you are open to your ideas being challenged?
African ideas of marriage are very traditional (Marriage for life). White Western ideas of marriage is divorce if you are not happy. Maybe you are a Western woman in Ghana. A fish out of water. Only you can answer that.
Passport bros are leaving Western countries for Africa/South America/Asia for life long wives. When Western men travel for wives we have to be very careful to leave our Western mindsets in the West for fear of contaminating the community we travel to with our Western ideas of personal happiness over family and community cohesion. Men find that hard. Some things are better left in the West.
Glad to have a full frank conversation though.
Modern woman vs traditional woman.
Modern men vs traditional men
Let's go
Lol😂
In Ghana, divorce isn't a new thing. There is a proverb in Akan language that's says, if you fear divorce, you'll never get good marriage.
It's obvious they will try to talk you out of it but in some cases, they will back you.
There are many tribes who have different views on marriage so...
Oh I’m open to other peoples opinions for sure, just respectfully. If you ever wanna have the debate on camera let me know
Love you both
Ain’t nobody got time for unproductive marriages babe! We move like real quick like Wi-Fi, well done Dela for choosing YOU!
There’s soo much debates regarding many aspects of relationships and people want to learn to help there own situations. So when you have your relationships on social media than people want to hear the content
It’s surprising to hear but you have to do what’s best for YOU!!!!
Do what makes you happy
You know what you went through so let that be
More people need to make that decision but just don’t
Possible topics to discuss;
Sexism is Ghana (girls & education, women & politics, women and devision making in the home etc)
Ageism in Ghana
Religion/no religion in Ghana
People trafficking through Ghana
Fake foreign 'visa connections in Ghana'
Do NGOs always have a positive influence in Ghana?
There are loads you can discuss
Most Ghana men date diaspora women for visa or in hopes to get that. Women rely a lot on men so the men always stay on top. It's a society of men being respected unlike the west. So it will take some time to solve these issues.
Some food for thought! There are values and standards in life including rules. We can agree with these and subscribe to having them or not and each decision has its pros and cons.
Nothing is perfect in life for life it’s not perfect including marriage. It’s a lifelong journey worthy of pursuit. If infidelity is involved in marriage, the Bible does weigh in on that.
All the best…
This was amazing, Ghanaians get divorced all the time lol so I don’t get this Gh culture thing it’s there in every culture has it where they want couples to stay together and grin and bare it
hey Dela 👋🏿 it was nice meeting you last week at the Black Star Line Festival, the Jamaican living in Ghana, I've been watching your shows since 2020 when I was in the UKKK, love your shows, you are so down to earth and a real Natural Ghana Girl, never change. I was sad about the situation too but seeing you now so happy and how you shared your story, I am happy for you! Hope to buck up on you again (as we say in Jamaica 🇯🇲😃) by the way you are doing well and I can see you being a serial entrepreneur! 🇬🇭
Hey! Yes it was really nice to meet. I’m sure we will meet again, Ghana is so small. If you ever feel like sharing your story about your journey here send me an email and we’ll make it happen 😊
@@moretodela hey gurl, thanks for responding, I'll send you an e-mail! 😃🙏🏿🇬🇭🇯🇲
The older generation got divorced a lot, some never married but they project their 'failures' on their children's relationship and would rather have them stick it out 'to save face'
Yes when there are chln involved work as hard as possible toresolve.
We are humans not divine. If someone won't budge or compromise, whatis the appropriate number of years to give chances and work it out. They ve been married for 20 ish years. This issue might have been 10 years in the making. We dont know.
Is it fair to have children in a household that is constantly tensed, parents arguing, being disrepectful to each other etc?
Or are we advocating for individuals to be 'doormats' , to keep taking what they can't bear, till the other person decides to compromise no matter how long it takes?
Great questions here that need answers
Dela, dont feel that you ever have to divulge the details of your break up. I like the podcast conversational format too.
This was good...in America it's called 'Dear Abby'
Thank you
Or strawberry letter
I didn’t know, l thought he just went behind the scenes like most do, I don’t read too much into other people’s stuff. You can’t interpret anything that you don’t even understand!
I love this for you Dela. I’ll be in ghana in 6 months please make room for me on your podcast ooooo. This conversation is amazing and soooo needed. Lots of learns and growth. Love you hun ❤ and i will take you out to lunch too when i come to ghana lol
Lol sure
I missed that video of you announcing your separation from Kwame and I have to go back and watch it. Well, it is what it is!
I disagree on people setting the perfect age for marriage at 30. There are no statistics that prove getting married older makes for happier long lasting relationships those are just opinions. Married since I was 20 we're now 40 and still happily married. Not only that most men marry to build a legacy meaning children and if he intends to have a lot of children starting at 30 is too late. Geriatric pregnancy starts at age 35 so you will have to rush through getting pregnant to lower your risk. Also women waiting until 30 to settle down tends to have a lot of male relationships meaning more baggage and trauma by the time they're 30 it's harder for them to pair bond as they are usually tainted by all the bad men they have encountered. Stats have shown women with a lower body count tend to be happier in long term marriages. Stats also show for black women if you're not married by age 35 you are most likely to never be married. Advising them to wait that long is almost setting them up to be a baby mama.
Finally we got 40K🎉.
Yay!!! Lovely surprise to wake up to
I would not recommend that women wait to get married at or after thirty, I think it's too late...For men its fine, but women have to fight biology, especially if they plan to have more than one child. Also, when they finally think they're ready for marriage after thirty, there's no guarantee they will automatically find the 'right' man, it may take years. Thanks for sharing such a sensitive topic, I know it wasn't easy.
Oh hush! Women are having babies well into their 40s 🙄
Oh, shut up!
@@mariam9977 I never said, they couldn't have babies later on, but that they have to deal with biology. Surely you know, the older a woman gets, the more complications they are likely to have. The older a woman gets, the less fertile they are and the less eggs they produce, ....then odds of birth defects increases with age as well...this is why you should not encourage women to have babies late in life "especially" in their 40's.
@@Uncle-Basil oh please. Having babies in 30s is not a problem. Mind your own uterus. I had 4 babies in my 30s
Don’t listen to these non-doctors. Every woman is different. They are just fear-mongering to make women panic and settle for men who aren’t worth their time and can’t even afford to raise a family. ❤️💫🌍
Dela, you don't just sound happier you look like a caterpillar who's emerged like a butterfly from its cocoon. I think that may confirm you weren't really happy in that marriage at all and perhaps the same for him. It's just a shame people can't be a little more braver and be upfront with their partner and say how they're feeling. I know its difficult to hear someone says they no longer want to be in a relationship and its hard to say that to someone also, it's a tricky and difficult situation.
Thank you 🙏🏾 😊. I am really happy
Hi Dela, i'd really wish you both gave us some advice and truths about dating and marriage ,especially your younger audience.
So far my take from the conversation is not to make marriage decisions too early in life and I hope we all learn from it. I'm hoping to hear from you -Ewoenam Honu
That’s a great idea actually. I’ll do that
Speculation:) man cheated? Can't wait to hear what happened, blockbuster..
I don’t know you but from what I have seen you where a good couple, I am sad but wish you both a nice life !
This is why I don't accept invitations from 20 plus year olds for their wedding. i'll tell them " Go find yourself and leave marrage alone until you know who you are". Ladies' Women don't run from goodness". Only you know what your limits are so if getting divorce is what you needed then to heck with what people thinks Too many people stay in "bondage "marriages and miserable or pretending to the outside world that they are happy when those who know them are wondering why they staying together.
They say stop beating a dead horse or something like that 😂 still going be dead not change
I really like this Podcast format.
I'm new here, I started watching your videos a little while ago and I like your personality and your smile. 🥰
I liked all the interviews, but not this one. 😑
Rochel's whole vibe and attitude towards a subject as delicate as this one was strange. I don't know why you opted for divorce (and I don't need to know), but I think and hope it was something completely opposite of your friend here. Rochelle divorce and left her husband (and children) and went after a "dream/career" in a country far away.
▪︎ Would you have your teeth treated by a toothless professional with bad breath? ▪︎ 🤔
The lesson I draw from this interview is:
Be careful with which friend you share certain challenges in life. If it's about marriage let me go to someone who has a good testimony (even though she is divorced), and has faith in marriage and family.
Be blessed,
New sub
Welcome
There are so many mean comments here but don’t mind them dela do what makes you happy in the end🙌🏾
Two beautiful babes ❤❤
My honest thoughts:
1: don’t talk about the divorce you might have get over it but am not sure about de children and kwame. Some gestures hurt for those who cares.
2: Rochelle shouldn’t have guess dela is not going to have a healthy relationship with her family anytime soon, I don’t see her as a family person
3: marrying at 25 is not young and looking back kwame was also 18 yrs younger that’s not an excuse. You can say u were naive but not young. Peace stay bless ❤
Ok 28 years of what..I was in a corner and she never knew who would love her and I'm still a good looking man.
I don't understand why people get so invested in people's lives like that. I find it weird... Don't these people have nothing else to do?