I’m glad you put yourself out there! I’ve had my heart broken too many times to count. Perhaps SHE did not feel worthy of your love and devotion!!! Be grateful you broke your own rules! Practice relationships. Put yourself out there!
You loved and got hurt. We have all been there. Please don’t allow it to shut down that part of yourself. She just wasn’t the right one for you. She wasn’t perfect for you because she didn’t love you back. You didn’t fall in love with her, you fell in love with the idea of her. You didn’t know her. You’re experiencing Limerance. Limerance is based on the hope of a relationship. You were in love with how she made you feel.
Exactly! Later you find out she's not as untouchable as you thought she was. Especially when the Halo effect starts to disappear. This guy hasn't felt true love. If he really does end up falling in love with someone, truly in love for a LONG time and he fucks it up and she disappears, then he will realize the difference between that love, and whatever this is.
@@janmil5630 Sometimes there is nothing you could have done , I had a gf I'd always try my best to see things from her perspective I'd let her how much I loved her I'd go into detail about everything I liked about her I'd spk so much abt everything I loved abt her but never ran out of things to say, she started getting distant and I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt, at one point I tried to tell her how I felt she was getting distant she said she didn't know what I was talking about , not long after she left me for one of her male friends, I used previous relationships with girls to learn something new, look at every way I fucked up and would not do it again idk where I fucked up, that's probably why I think about her everyday tryna see my mistakes
something like this has happened to me too. I couldn't believe that someone that I feel so connected to could not like me back. how could it have been so real but it isn't real on the other side? I still don't understand...
Other people are just mirroring our fears and beliefs about ourselves. If someone rejects you, ask yourself what parts of yourself are you rejecting and in what ways you are not loving yourself ❤
Your life is your own friend, but if you choose to live a single life until 40 for fear of hurt, I'm afraid you may end up being a fairly uninteresting person if you go through life without truly experiencing it, you may also intentionally miss out on finding your person. Pain is a part of the ride, you cannot truly appreciate life without knowing it.
This is the first time I feel grateful for the TH-cam algorithm. I recently had a very similar experience with a woman, and the singularity of it made me think no one else could possibly relate. But it feels comforting to know someone else has been through the same thing. I still think of her, still have a soft spot for her, and I’ve rejected others because being with them just doesn’t compare to being with her. Even though I know she’ll never be mine, maybe our brains just struggle to comprehend how such an intense desire and candid love can be one-sided so we refuse to let go
This is probably not going to be comfortable for you to read but here goes. When you feel a load of intense emotion for someone, you need to manage that very carefully. You need to spend much smaller amounts of time together, to allow her feelings time to build and develop. Give her time to adjust to her own feelings. There is literally no downside to doing this, even if she appears to have feelings that are just as intense as yours. Basically, its almost impossible to go too slowly, but its extremely possible to go too quickly. You unlocked feelings in her that she was not equipped to deal with and she ran. I'm so sorry this happened to you. ❤
Things like that hurt a lot because you're not just sad over what happened, but also you're sad over what could've been. Also, its likely that she was really into you after the first date but likely had a fear of intimacy/commitment so the fact that you guys connected so well may have scared her so she shut her feelings for you off. I and many other guys have been through the same thing so I give you serious props for sharing, especially since not a lot of guys are open about this. I think another reason it hurts so much is because before something like that happens, you dont think it's possible for it to ever happen. But now you know, now you can date knowing that it's possible to get your heart broken, so it won't hurt nearly as bad. You handled this, so there's nothing else you can't handle.
It’s New Year’s Eve and I’m and drunk and have no one no girlfriend no friends and my parents who are in their fifties who have a more exciting social life are out with their friends and to be truthful I feel really fucking sad and this is the realest shit I have ever seen someone post on the internet so thank you and God bless you brother. Much love. Next year is ours and we will find strength in God. Amen.
This is what love is like! It doesn’t last which is why it’s so special. Sometimes we’re separated by circumstances or even death. It doesn’t mean it’s not love no matter how fleeting! Honor your love because it’s so special.
this kind of connection REALLY changes you. something similar happened to me this year and I even cried when you said some things. the trust it’s that you can never forget these people, i haven’t forgotten him either but you just have to live with it even though you will keep them in your heart for the rest of your life.
Don’t worry brother. You aren’t alone. I still haven’t gotten over my ex going on a decade soon. Sometimes, no one else can beat the feeling and experience you had with a specific person. No matter how many dates and people who you’ve dated after that person. There’s always that one.
Damn this makes me scared as a woman.. who knows the man you're dating nowadays might not be over his ex and pretends to love you. I've also heard this a lot of times that men never really get over their first love, they might still love you but will never love you as much as they loved their first love.. which hurts if you're dating a man who already had his first love then you'll never be his #1. I also was the first love of someone so ik what's up but I thought it wasn't universal but ig it is
Wow. This was the most vulnerable I have ever witnessed a man let himself be. You give me hope man! This lady in your heart probably felt like it was too good to be true.. and also didn't feel worthy of it. We are complicated creatures. You will love again. Your heart has been cracked open .. and I am sorry that you had to feel it so painfully. But it is the only way... You will love again and be loved in return, and yes it's scary! But now you know.. it's the only thing worth living for. ❤ Thank you for opening up to the world.. many men will find solace in your words. Stay blessed 🌳
unrequited love hurts so bad, I understand you and I don't want to experience that again but I believe that those things make us grow and that is good.
Im half way through the video, subconsciously expecting u to have at least a couple tens of thousands of subscribers. You conversate very eloquently and your honesty is inspiring. Im honored to be one of the earliest to have found your channel
What your feeling isn't really love. It's limerence. To love someone means that they put you before themselves. She didn't do that, and you actually don't really know her very well. Limerence can make you think you know someone much better than you really do. What we tend to do in that state is only think about how we feel about them, not how they feel about us. In reality, women may say they want vulnerability, but when you put intense emotions on them quickly, they tend to run away. They fall in love a lot slower, so even though it can feel like there's this insane connection, divide that by 10 to get an idea of where she is at, even if she says differently. With women, they can fake a date and make you think its the best time they've ever had. They'd almost rather do that than have to reject you in person. Only her actions show her real motives. You should open up in the future, but it has to be at a healthy pace once trust is established first. That only comes with time and seeing someone's actions.
@@Goddessv717 but apparently you can? Love isn't that unique. There's a billion dollar music industry dedicated to it. Yes, most men go through limerence. I've had it myself, which is why I know it when I see it.
Limerence is a part of falling in love, it's ok but he needs to be able to get over this phase and still love the person after hightened emotions of the limerence stage
She just highlighted unhealed wounds you already had inside. That's the purpose of heartbreak, to open our wounds for us to see them and heal them. And you already had a fear of vulnerability and intimacy and feeling of unworthiness. That's why you are so much in your mind, it's a defense mechanism to avoid feeling the unprocessed pain in your body. Heartbreak happens for our heart to open more. And you can't control life, real and magical life happens when you let yourself go and surrender for whatever comes your way. Your soul has a plan, but your ego is in fear and wants to control life. I am telling you this from my own life experience. You can't live life closed off. That's not living. You're living life by feeling it, not by thinking it. Wish you all the luck in the world.
Wise words. Feels like you have described me as a person. I had two very harmful experiences with dating which also showed me my unhealed scars. The bad thing is that I am completely pulling back now and that I do not want to get to know anyone. Has been like that for a long time in my life already, during my teenage years and now I am back at this state. I feel alienated even by the thought of dating someone. I think that I can't handle it. I let my mind rule my behaviour and I am too afraid to let anyone come close to me.
@@justasmalltowngirl4084 You have to heal your traumas, try meditating, connecting with your body, whatever brings you in your body. Try not to run from your uncomfortable emotions. Learn to sit with them when they arise, there will be a lot of crying, but it is necessary to release the pain. And relationships with other people are also important, because they trigger us for our own good. There is nothing to afraid, the more pain you release the more space for love and joy you will make.
I really admire people who dare to share such intimate feelings and experiences online. It helps other realize they’re not alone. This is called limerence. I suggest and hope you and others who can relate to this video have an open mind and look into it! Thanks for sharing. 🖤
that person we fell in love with feels like a drug. you’re so tempted to text them when you’re not supposed to and then end up doing it anyways. when they are no longer a part of your life, when you’re so used to texting them and such and those texts doesnt come in anymore, feels like withdrawal.
Aw, this was sweet, I can’t say I recommend your decided life path because heartbreak is not something you can avoid and schedule out of your life. I hope it works out and you find someone special guy
It's the loneliest feeling in the world, yet its this pain that unites us all. I'm 19 right now. I just got out of a 3 year relationship four months ago. Every prom, every holiday was experienced with her. I saw her every day for those 3 years. I gave up full scholarships to my dream schools for her. She broke up with me because we were having problems and I had a lot of really tragic things happen to me that made me emotionally unavailable. I watched her bring home a rebound relationship while I was moving out, whom she has been with since. Hearing them sleep together in the bed I put up for her was traumatizing. Not how I wanted things to go, but this is how the story goes. The time was special to me. I miss it; I miss her. But I know I need to move on and be ready for when the next one comes. It sounds like it was special for you too.
damn that sounds terrible… if my ex slept with their new fling in the same house I live in, I would really question what kinda person they are.. afterall we can see what kind of type people are once they dont get any advantage from being kind to us anymore…😵💫
Jett, I’m 41 and have had so much heartbreak. But it’s part of life and you honestly learn and grow from it. You also learn about your self worth and value when you go through it. You will probably break someone’s heart at some point without knowing. You speak so well and seem sincere and genuine. You’re going to have a great life.✌🏽♥️
I feel like sometimes we mix between being in love with a person or with what the person makes us feel I have felt heartbroken and rejected multiple times it’s literally such an awful feeling when you fall in love over and over again but no one reciprocates that feeling it really sucks but at the same time each time I feel like I learn more how to handle and control my emotions and it becomes less painful because I know deep down I will meet the right person one day and he deserves it too Also being in love is peaceful and calm and safe I always keep reminding myself that feeling that euphoria at the beginning is usually a very bad sign. Love creeps upon you slowly when you’re not even thinking about it at least that’s how I hope to fall in love the next time
Same. She was my mentor, really helped me get my life together. I'll never forget the lessons she taught me but I had to move on. Stay strong brothers.
Your words about her and the way you expressed your feelings were so heartfelt and beautifully articulated-thank you for sharing your experience. It resonated deeply with me because I’ve had a similar connection with someone. I’ve known him since childhood, and through random, uncontrollable circumstances, we would reconnect sporadically over the years. These days, we check in with each other occasionally through social media. Now, we live in different countries, and while we’ve both acknowledged feeling a strong connection, the barriers of distance and logic make it hard to truly understand each other as we are today. I’m not sure if what I feel is limerence or a genuine connection-especially since I’ve never felt this close to another human being-but hearing your story made me feel less alone. Thank you.
Went through something similar this October and it is so fkn painful. Even tho I know/understand that he wasn’t „the one” and was far from what he tried to sell me …my stupid heart can’t let go 😔 In the long run thinking about him so often only stops me from finding someone better…
oh man this is so relatable, it’s almost as though i could have made this video myself. it’s been two months since i last spoke to this person and i still think about him more than i thought possible. i feel silly for it but it meant something to me because i really let myself go for the first time.
Thank you for being so vulnerable on here. It's refreshing to see a man talk so openly about their feelings. I also see so much of myself in you, so hearing you pour your heart out really resonated with me on so many levels. Obviously I don't know you, or the girl or what exactly the situation was. But speaking from my own experiences I can say this; if you are wholeheartedly sincere with someone and they pull away, it's usually because they don't know how to receive real love or genuine advances. Don't let bad experiences jade or harden your heart, because your warmth and sensitivity are what separate you (in the best way possible) from the insincere and deceptive "romance" that's so prevalent in modern dating. The high degree of self-awareness you have is apparent, so my comment probably won't be giving you any profound insight that you aren't already privy to. But I want to say this regardless; I hope you will reconsider that "single till 40" thing. I understand wanting to protect your heart, especially after the painful experience you've had with your first love. But you'll never know the ecstasies that life has to offer if you only ever try to preserve yourself. Don't be afraid to give love, rather, learn how to give love generously, yet wisely. Be courageous in baring your soul to the world, because it's a beauty that deserves a center stage to be seen :)
Thanks for sharing, I myself have been going through something similar and it really sucked when I had to make the decision to put myself first and move on. Even though I probably did fall in love as well, literally just based on a few conversations and interactions. I truly thought that I had found the one everyone talks about, I was so sure that that was it. Then he would ignore me and left me feeling rejected, which is fine. Now I feel that real love doesn’t abound, or leaves you confused(in my case). But it’s a privilege to love regardless of how it ends. although the heartbreak was awful if I ever feel like that again for someone and they show up for me, I would do it all again.
This can be a twin flame connection. Really once in a life time… you might be faxina DNOTS (dark night of the soul). I swear there’s a moment when all this suffering goes away 🙏♥️ this connection is about us, to heal ourselves.
From the moment i started listening to him, my heart started beating faster than usual. I feel deeply this is what he'sexperiencing. Not many people understand. Only the few who have experienced it can relate to it. I send him love and light. He need to spend time in meditation/with God/source/universe and things will be made clearer for him.
Youre going to meet a lot of people throughout your life that'll make you feel like you know them... Or youll hit it off so well right away... It doesn't mean you need to be together.. You're a very good looking young man.. much better looking than the average guy.. not sure if youre aware.. Im sorry about what happened... She wasn't your person.. might have felt that way for you but clearly it wasn't the case for her... One thing I learned is... if they really wanted you, you wouldn't feel confusion.. You opened up.. got hurt.. please don't deny that part of yourself to someone that deserves it...
You CAN fall in Love in two weeks. Boundless. Thank you for uploading it and being 'vulnerable' in that manner. Virtue virtue virtue. Always feel your feelings when they come. They are your compass. Beautiful video.
@@AnjeaFilms I'm coming from the perspective of wanting to feel everything that life introduces. Being a home or safe passage to every emotion and finding beauty in it all
Nah i don’t and i keep getting hurt by men who start by treating me so good in the beginning and then they end up treating me like shit in the end. People change
mourning someone you wish you knew better is so painful, but please don’t think too much about her reasons for falling out of your life, it’s not your fault. sending love xx
I’m thankful for people like you who are willing to put themselves out there and share very personal stories like this. It helps so much to know that others go through this. I find it so interesting, fascinating really that very rarely, maybe even once or never for some, a person comes into our lives and completely turns it upside down and we have these unexplainable feelings, emotions or reactions. In times of pain, I try to remember that people come in and out of our lives along our journeys. Some are only with us for a short while, but they show us something about ourselves. They teach us something. Something we didn’t know or weren’t aware of. Like a mirror. It’s hard to realize that and see through the pain in the moment but looking back, it certainly makes sense. Not everyone is meant to stay. I wish I had realized this in my 20s and appreciated it for what it is.
My ex bf had similar feelings as yours. 2 months ago i decided to broke up with my boyfriend. We were dating for about a month. I’ll be honest with you, I don’t love him anymore, but I don’t hate him either. One of the reasons why I decided to broke up with him is because he didn’t truly love me, he was still in love with the girl he loved when he was 14-15 (we’re 18 now), but they broke up because she moved to another country. When we were arguing online the day our relationship ended, I still loved him, but I just didn’t want to waste my time for the person who didn’t have those deep feelings as i had, that’s why I said to him that we need to break up. I clicked on this video because I wanted to understand what was happening to him (and probably is still happening to him now). He told me about this girl when we were already in a relationship, but I accepted his feelings, cus I wanted to relieve his heart from this pain by my love. I wanted him to start a new beautiful life without this girl, but it didn’t happen. Nowadays, I’m glad that I made this decision, because looking at him now (we study in the same group at university), I understand that he is not a good person. He’s an attention seeker, he sees women only as bodies, but I’m not mad at him, because now I don’t care anymore (but I won’t stay aside if he do something bad to girls from my group). Thank you for sharing your experience, I hope you will get better soon bro ☹️
Oh my...I started crying while listening to you because I felt this. I also have never been in a relationship because I never clicked with anyone before. However, I met this guy during summer last year and I did not fell in love at first. Still, i did feel so at peace with him that it was truly beautiful. He was a total gentleman and such a kind, sweet guy. I always felt so bored when talking to guys through phone but not with him. We went on a few dates during summer and tbh, he was the one who was probably more into me than I was. He sent me a lot of sweet messages and also while we went on dates, he initiated conversations about people knowing about us. Whenever we went out, we always talked for more than 5 hours. However, after one month, things changed after I told him I want a relationship in the future. After that, he changed his behaviour. He cancelled two dates, also because he felt sick. We then dated for two more months but it ended with him saying he is not ready to give his all into a relationship even though he is interested in me. It hurt A LOT, I cried a lot for two months and tbh, I still do. Maybe people will call it limerence and even idk what i truly felt. But the same as you, I know that was something I felt for the first time. As you mentioned, feeling so vulnerable sharing your feelings and then being rejected truly feels like someone just stabbed you. What really helped me is knowing that there are many people in this world who could be your good match when it comes to falling in love and relationship. The society is made to believe that there is just this one person who is your missing part and no one else can replace them. Of course, everyone is unique in it's own way. It is not like I am going to ever forget this guy cause he truly made so much impact on me. Although i cry because of him, I know that there are probably people out there who are just as much as good match as he was AND they will make our relationship work, not just for a few months but they will truly commit to me, whether seeing me sad or seeing me happy. Hope this helps :) Also, what helped me as well is that someone once told me that if you really like or love someone and you lost that person, whether platonically or romantically, take up one hobby or one kind gesture they did so you never lose that good thing they left you, which is becoming better version of yourself or just to become a kinder person.
Your story felt so heart-warming. I felt so happy for you and then I felt heart-broken for you. I think we've all been there. Thank you for sharing your love story.
Its interesting how you mentioned breaking the rules you set for yourself. It shows how, in the moment, our raw, authentic side often takes over... especially when things seem to be going well. This is exactly why we shouldn't be vulnerable at least when we first meet someone.
Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your story. You never really know what someone is going through until they share their experiences. It’s nice to see this raw and sincere perspective
This is such a genuine and thoughtful perspective. Thank you for sharing. Nothing you said was cringe, feelings are not worthy of such judgement. Wonderful video.
so weird, that i saw your video today. i had a very similar experience in early 2022 with someone i met and dated for a few months and then ended because i had to move from the U.S. to france. i feel so strange, that i am still thinking about them all the time, i really appreciate you sharing this
You're describing the very same experience I had!! it's too powerful that it leaves one of the two more scared than the other and from there comes the blockage (a wall) I'm sure that's what happened to her she just got too scared cause that kind of feeling couldn't exist if it weren't mutual.
It’s so sweet watching man speaking this way🫠Your feelings are real, although once you let go the notion that it’s dangerous to let love happen in your life again and control, you will see and explore more about you and others.what’s true about love itself.love also heals and gives you different eyes to see but you need to let to experience both sides of it. As Rumi says: “ Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it“. You can find love when you let life happen to you. Let your heart life dont protect it, he’s warrior he can heal while remembering taste of true love, and this love is first of all, the love of your being. What you experienced was refletion of your love, who you are. She was a mirror ☀️enjoy life
you're so incredible for being able to talk about your feelings like this❤ i learned something throughout my previous love experiences and that is "the potential you see in others is your own" , we don't love people because of who they are but because of who we are, i recognize myself so much in what you're saying.. i really understand you, but i wanna tell you you didn't know her, she isn't what you're imagining in your head, that is all the fantasy and like i said YOUR OWN POTENTIAL you'll get through this and let me tell you love is much more than this experience, you don't know how good you'll have it with someone who'll love you back ❤ (and getting over someone with whom you never dated for a long time, or even never been an official partner can be particularly challenging, cuz you don't know how the bad moments would be like, YOU NEVER HAD ONES, ofc this situationship would be incredible next to the real thing, don't compare a fantasy to the real thing.)
Thank you for sharing such genuine feelings, With this world getting so artificial is heartwarming to find such a treasure online. I’m a very romantic person and finding your video is an affirmation that we all fall in love when least expected.
If many men were so real and authentic as u the world would be such a beautiful place for women ❤️. Sorry that u were brokenhearted. Any woman will literally fell in love with u instantly. You will find the right one for you. Don't give up
i share a very similar experience to yours, and the girl in your story sounded like me. i’d found someone who struck me immediately upon meeting and it felt very different. it felt very deep, like i’d known this person forever. we had linked up again a year after meeting, and it ended quickly due to insecurity and fear on my end. i was afraid they would leave me, so i left first (stupid, i know- it was trauma related and i was very young). what we found out years later was just how strong the connection really was- when i’d think about them deeply, they would reach out to me and vice versa. we had dreams about each other that would happened in real life. the whole thing was..outer-worldly almost. it felt spiritual. but we couldn’t be together unfortunately. i say all of this to say this: i believe you were meant to experience all of this for a reason. i realized how special some people are, and when you find someone that you connect with immediately, then they are meant to be in your life for a reason, whether it’s forever or for a moment. limerence or not- she had a profound impact on you, your heart, and probably your view on life and people. for me, it taught me that i only want to be with someone if the connection feels that deep again. i believe those who experience this are meant to have a profound love and to build profound connections. never think harshly of yourself or be ashamed from this and how you feel. she may have set the standard for you when it comes to love. you will find that kind of love again. god bless you, keep going
sorry for how long that is 😣 i want to add this too- not to get your hopes up, but maybe you impacted her the same way, and she was potentially afraid due to her own personal struggles. it’s possible she wasn’t ready. if i were you, i would reach out one last time and just say you hope she’s doing well. you never know what could happen. if she doesn’t reply or it doesn’t go well, i hope you hold in your heart the knowing that you will find a deep love again. i believe it’s meant for you. good luck ♥️
Seems like u came across a transformative connection, I've gone through one as well, and hecc it really reversed my personality. These kinds of connections are really intense and break apart when you're feeling insecure. Just continue working on urself
It's been a long time since I watched a video as intently as yours. This was beautiful, I hope you know that, and very very brave. This is why dating is hard, but especially while you were talking about the month long heartbreak I thought,that being true to your feelings was beautiful. It would have been beautiful if you had succeded and gotten together with her, but maybe it's even more beautiful in tragedy, bc that's why nobody wants to be honest and vulnerable, to net feel, to not get hurt. But you did everything right. It's a good reminder for me too, I just got hurt and the urge to close up is strong, but no, won't do it. Being hurt is part of it, not understanding too. I wish you all the best for future, hope you'll find your true love at 40
She was not the one,She was someone god send her in your to wake up that beautiful feelings, do not give up to find the right one. Love is wonderful when we are with the right person.
if a girl is interested, trust me she will let you know :D but thing is, when a girl is the doing the first move, the guys are usually put off by that. I want a someone with whom I can do life, life in all its aspects, but it seems out of reach for the moment therefore I am focusing in myself and healing what i injured, which is myself. I am glad you shared this video, it helped me, I am watching some of those kinds of videos and they make me feel so lonely but I feel something healing in me. So Thank you.
Sometimes, it’s really not all about YOU. After hearing your story, I feel a bit in awe bc I don’t think I’ve ever truly loved or liked someone passionately, giving my whole heart. I’ve always played games to protect myself, so I wouldn’t get hurt or feel destroyed but looking back, I wish I had done more of what I truly wanted or expressed my feelings more raw and authentically. (I do have a fearful avoidant attachment) Basically, what I want to say is that I think you’ve really enjoyed a part of your youth! Plus, I don’t want to sleep around or date too many ppl. I want to save my whole heart for the right person (: yay hehe
at first I really thought this was a fictional story and not that you lived through it because it’s rare for people to demonstrate that much vulnerability here, it was beautiful, I cried
I've noticed quite a few things in your vid as have many others, and it really boils down to this. Each of us possesses distinct personality traits and attachment styles, leading to varied emotional responses. Seeing that she represents many of your 'firsts', it's understandable that you've developed a deep sense of attachment to that 'feeling'. It's less about her as an individual and more about the 'potential' and the contributions you've made that highlight her uniqueness. This appears to be a classic case of limerence. Given that it's been years and you still express strong feelings, it may be an opportune moment to reflect critically here. Set aside personal feelings and approach such this with a clear perspective. The lack of response from her interprets as a sign of disinterest. If someone genuinely shared mutual feelings, you wouldn't find yourself in solitude without an explanation. Ghosting often reflects a person's reluctance to communicate their feelings, which can come across as avoidance. I'm not entirely convinced she was actually unwell; it could have been a strategy of sorts. Anyway, you come across as genuinely sweet, and it's evident that you have a kind presence. It's a bit unfortunate that you're not currently active in the dating scene, as I believe you would be quite appealing to many, myself included lol. 🫣I truly wish for your healing and growth, as you absolutely deserve it.
Woow. Thanks for sharing this. This happened to me when I was 16-19. I did a very self reflecting on why I loved them that much. I made deep thinking of the dynamic of our relationship and how we use to communicate. I relalized that she didn’t really open up that much to me. She was emotionally unavailable but never showed and she would act mysterious around me. I realized she wasn’t like that with others just me. Came to find out she was never genuine and that she was using me. She made herself so interesting by not sharing much whiles also acting that this isn’t one sided. She liked being loved and liked and being obsessed with. She was a narcissist. How I moved on was that I excepted the situation and I journaled and acknowledged the pain I felt and took it as a lesson. I also learned more about myself about things that I needed to heal from and work on like communication and my attachment style. I started being open to new relationships while’s also excepting that it’ll be hard at first but it’ll get easier with time. Now I see her around and I just don’t feel anything for them. Sometime I look back and I am just like I was so innocent and stupid to let someone overpower me the way they did without even earning my love for them. I let them consume me without them putting the work in. I realized that I loved a version of them that they made up and I also created in my head. That’s one of the biggest lessons of my life. You can move on from this woman believe me with time and healing you will. You lovable and are capable of loving a healthy person who is real and capable of creating healthy relationship with you. ❤
I like your openness and honesty. It is interesting how you thought about this girl for so long, after just that brief meeting. From a woman's perspective it was too much too soon. She may have seen that trait as being needy which is a turn off for both men and women. Rejection kills even in a casual relationship but you need to keep things in perspective. You sound like a sensitive and caring person, Tinder is probably not the place for you. Don't waste yourself though there are women out there who are looking for a genuine connection. Just want to add, don't pick girls up from their place on the first date. Meet in a public place, somewhere you would like to go and something you would like to do. Because even if the date doesn't pan out at least you had a fun outing.
Stumbled apon your video, what a courageous sharing, sent into internet space. I just couldnt stop listening. So from a woman perspective, huh and now i m 55, and still my feelings can go spinning. I just try to even the up and downs with a lot of meditation, breathing practices etc. But at 20-35 every thing could come tumbling down. Maybe it still can. So pleas dont think she stood you up. Maybe it was just too overwhelming for her. Off course so sorry she didnt cam back and give an explanation. 😢 A big hug for your broken heart ❤️🩹 love
Great and honest video. More than likely she had intimacy issues which made her run and at the same time you came on too strong which scared her away, mistakes on both sides but that's life.
I'm living a really similar situation rigth now. I met a girl a few months ago and i felt something special that i haven't felt before. I've been with other girls(though not to much), so i know how it feels when you like someone, but this time was different. This girl and I spent the last 2 months dating every week. The second date, talked about our feelings and she told me she liked me back but had ended up a really really long relationship about a year ago, so she didn't felt confortable with begining a new one. She told me she wanted to keep meeting each other but as friends. And i felt so connected to her, so I accepted. Every conversation we had was like floating in the space, i felt that we were alone in the world. The ours we spent together felt like minutes, even seconds. We continnued dating, and finnally, we kissed. It felt like no kiss has felt ever for me. We spend that whole afternoon together, hugging each other, holding our hands and talking about life. I asked her about us, and she told me that she wanted to keep dating me and that she liked me so much. I left her house that night feeling the luckiest man alive but everything turned so badly. 2 Days later i texted asking how she spent her weekend and she answered with a cold "Good". I got worried and asked if everything was alright, she told me she was worried about what had happened the other day, so i told her she could tell me anything she felt because I wouldn't judge her. Her response was "I dont fell confortable with this, i prefer to end this relationship". I was shocked, i didn't beg for an opportunity, i felt confused and hurt. It was like something stabbed me really deep inside, it really felt like a physical pain. This was 3 weeks ago. I spent the whole Christmas holydays, asking myself what i did wrong, Why her feelings changed so fast and feeling that I wasn't enough. Now i have to see this girl everyday at college, and everytime i see her face, something twists inside me. She's acting cool, like nothing happened, but for me it felt special. I don't have any resentment towards her, but I can't look to her face because I remember everything and my world falls apart. I'd really like to keep her as a friend but i dont feel capable of doing it and not expecting something more than a friendship. So here I am now, dealing with the pain, seeing this girl every morning and wondering if i'll ever feel the same with another girl. I really hope the best for her but i'd like to put a world between us. I think i can get over this but it'll take me some time. I felt very represented Watching your video talking about your experience. I understand how you felt that month you cried every single day. I really hope the best for you 🫂
Thank you for sharing. I had a guy break it for with me recently right before the holidays. I felt like I was just miss lead and used I did fall for him head over heals and him pulling away was extremely crushing. And I thought I had found something real for the first time in my life iv dated in the past but this felt different because he was someone I had history with. I guess am not thankful for the experience because it seems so disingenuate now. Like I was just a toy that was used for his ego. I don't really feel like he even gave me a real shot before he meet another woman at a wedding week within our get together. Am doing everything to try to move on put the pain feels so real. And everyday since Christmas I wake up hopefully the feeling will just disappear. All that to say thank you for sharing your heart.🙏🏻
I relate to this a lot! I went abroad on an exchange semester, didn't want to or mean to fall in love, but we don't control these things... Still hoping she will gather the courage to come here, even if just for a while, but I don't believe it's likely.
It was very courageous of you to talk on here about this painful experience. Take strength from knowing you learned important life lessons from this, and you can carry that new knowledge into your next love connections in a positive manner. You are a handsome, intelligent, feeling young man - your true love is going to cross your path. ❤
Boyyy I’m in this exact boat, he treated me like crap but I still want the best for him. I just need to remind myself to detach and remember the bad everyday
You know, I listened to your video hearing you say things like "i know it seems hyperbolic (to fall in love in two weeks, or to feel something powerful when holding hands) and i can't help but scream NO its not hyperbolic! It happens! It happened to me, it happens to many people, your feelings and your flowers weren't "too much", they were fine and its okay that you expressed them that way. It would have been ok if these feelings were not reciprocated, but she lacked courage when she ghosthed you. You WERE treated badly and you are allowed to feel sad/angry/shitty about this, and to cry for a month, and to still be haunted by this. I hope that you can heal from this -but you are not too much, don't worry.
:O I was in your place for 4 years, and the tears lasted more than a month, and every day almost every second felt like it belong to him. Then he found a gf and my feelings for him stopped, right at that moment , so 4 years later I started talking to someone online, who lives nearby me, who is the total opposite of that first love, and I felt something strong for that dude too. But I had a lot of things to work on and I still do now, so it ended up by going no contact, I still miss that guy but the first love i felt is gone for good. No matter how much time it takes, just take your time, you'll feel sad and happy at times, it's normal, I am nobody to advice you because I still feel the need to work on myself first, but I can advice you to take your time. Just like I am taking the time.
I thought I was in love with someone because it was the early days, everything feels like this "honeymoon phase" which lasted around six months but then time wears that off, you see the flaws in that person, you have a sense of clarity when they fog is lifted. Turns out this "wonderful" person who I imagined the rest of my life with was an alcoholic (hidden from me) who was using me because they were an addict. Sometimes what we perceive as love is nothing but a crush, it feels good at first, you have all that excitement but then the reality kicks in. Sometimes, people don't show you their true self until you're deep in
Ohh my godd, I feel you . The " being afraid of liking someone who wouldn't feel the same " part 😢 ive had issues with trusting people bec im afraid they'd hurt me (mostly bec of a bad friendship i had recently and seeing failed relationships around) and I was talking about it to a friend and that I'd rather be alone.my friend told me something and it stuck with me, she said "maryam you'll meet amazing people in life but if you don't give them a chance in trusting them , you'll never know good people at all " still scared but I think I've let some people in and I didn't regret it 🥹
Yeah you don't want to date because you fear rejection and after what happened with that girl you fear feeling that way ever again, personally as someone a fair bit older I think its entirely silly that you feel so strongly about this girl, especially when its more than likely that shes forgotten you completely, i'm not saying this to be mean its just most likely the case, you can meet someone and get on really well but it doesn't mean the connection is significant, at the end of the day based on what you've said you are basically both strangers to eachother, furthermore the idea of not dating until you're 40 is insane you will miss out on so much out of fear and insecurity, I hope this is abit of tough love to get you thinking mate good luck!
@Jett-25actually i think she feels exactly like you and will be so sad you to not act on it. Basically you will lose the love of your life. i am almost 30 years, and trust me, you can like a person in many ways. But love ….. that’s oane in a life time.
Yes 40 is insane. I can’t imagine ever settling down with a man who is 40 years old who hasn’t learned critical life lessons you learn while going through relationships. I have dated and have had long breaks and been married. I dated an older man with no children even but I greatly greatly appreciated the fact he had been in previous long term relationships because he knew exactly how to treat me. He wasn’t perfect but he had been taught or learned lessons that I benefited from. Other people would say why on earth would you date someone so much older but that is the reason. All the things you are feeling, can be felt right now!! You could be doing all these things with a sweet loving girl and experience it with her while you are both young and it will be special. An older woman will not be impressed because she has been through that phase and will not want to train a man. A younger woman who isn’t using you for money will want you as an older man because he knows exactly how to handle and exactly what he has in his fingertips and usually appreciates you sharing your youth with him. Just saying please please please live your life and have these experiences before you regret it.
It could be true. She may have wanted you to chase her depending on her own wounding & stuff. I think you gave enough space (3 years!) that’s it’s safe again to experiment with reaching out if you can. Also, if you’re at peace with the thought of being rejected outright. I don’t think she would ghost you again… there’s a good chance she received karma about that simply because of how she left you feeling with no explanation. It usually happens that way (as someone who has been on both the receiving & giving end of this behavior). Now, I only ghost someone if they’ve been undeniably disrespectful.
I think I've never related more to a TH-cam video. We'd known each other for 3 months. It's been 2,5 years since it ended and I still think about him every day
Hey. Thanks alot for sharing such a delicate thing. What I can say is, I've been there and I just felt like telling you something I have felt within me after this kind of experience. JUST BE. Let go when you can and if she pops up in your mind again tell yourself even add expressions if you can, how amazing it is to have been alive to experience that in every fabric of your being, you got to see that part of you you never imagined possible. And then say, but part of truelove is letting go, you showed you loved her by letting her go by the way, that was huge. You placed her above your own desires❤ and that's just real. Back to what I was saying, like waves, allow yourself to flow with what you experienced and just being exactlyas you are now and whats to come. FLOW. It is well. I know this is long but bear with me. Everything happens for a reason and you are teaching yourself to surrender with the motions of life with the fact that you didn't force anything you just loved. By the way you need to really thank yourself for being that brave and selfless and just truly in love. Another thing is Love is never ending, eternal and pure and true, you might not want to hear it now but you will always have love coz you are love itself. You having experienced that is proof, YOU ARE IT. And whether it ends up being someone else or not, let's not even think of who it could be, just be. Experience love, grow it , nurture it, embrace it. Whether its love with someone or love of nature, love of family, love of your amazing self, it doesnt matter just LOVE. don't have to think about anything. But you are love itself ALWAYS KNOW THAT. AND REALLY....APPRECIATE THAT. So yeah just flow. If there are days you break, honor that break by allowing yourself to feel it and cry if you want to coz what you felt and what happened, you need to honor your heart and feel those emotions and talk to it as well. Coz IT REALLY SHOWED IT WAS LOVE. Mine took 5 years and while coming out of it, that's what I did. I spoke well about the situation and felt gratitude for such an experience even if it didn't even start let alone end(that's my experience) I learnt and saw what love was and I grew and grew with the love that was still around me and the one still within(selflove) I can honestly say I view love in a whole other way and meaning. And it could never truly leave me even though someone leaves. I knew then that my power to love was real. And somehow right now that's enough. Anyways all the best dude. And you are dang strong💯. Peace❤
@emuhu001 "I would dare wish..*he* felt like I was the one..but me myself..I'm unable to accept this concept of him not having full control of his will..So if this is the freedom you craved to own my deceased jasmine dragon..so be it!❤".-
@user-kp3rc4eq8x No the same guy. It didn’t work out the first time we tried dating. Then five years later we reconnected and have been together for four years now. Happily.
The level of attraction has nothing to do with the duration of a relationship. It is not even necessary to be in a romantic relationship to feel very strong for someone. It was very lovely listening to you
When I was younger, I met a guy that made me feel some type of love for the first time. It was so unfamiliar for me, I wasn’t used to those feelings. I dated him for a month and left him for someone that I felt this obsession for, who later turned out to be abusive and showed me zero love. But that was familiar for me and I chose it. I wasn’t ready for anything real, I was too damaged to choose a healthy person. I often remembered the first guy and felt regrets, also I saw that he met some other girl and has been with her for years, so good for him. I made a few more mistakes before finally meeting my soulmate and I couldn’t be happier. If I hadn’t made a lot of bad choices before, I would have never met this person I am with now. It was magical, so many coincidences had to happen for that. So whatever happens, I believe that there is a good outcome for anyone when the timing is right. So please, let yourself experience life and meet new people, let yourself be loved for real, and you won’t have any doubts and anxieties when it’s real love.
She isn’t the love of your life, she’s just the person you’ve loved the most so far.
I love when people talk honestly about their feelings.
me too
Exactly
You love when people talk about their feelings only when it doesn’t make you uncomfortable.
I’m glad you put yourself out there! I’ve had my heart broken too many times to count. Perhaps SHE did not feel worthy of your love and devotion!!! Be grateful you broke your own rules! Practice relationships. Put yourself out there!
You loved and got hurt. We have all been there. Please don’t allow it to shut down that part of yourself. She just wasn’t the right one for you. She wasn’t perfect for you because she didn’t love you back. You didn’t fall in love with her, you fell in love with the idea of her. You didn’t know her. You’re experiencing Limerance. Limerance is based on the hope of a relationship. You were in love with how she made you feel.
Wow, what a really insightful comment. Thank you so much. I’ll hold on to that :)
Its same for me for nearly the last 2 years. I have shut down that part. I don't think the introvert in me will let me fall for anyone ever.
@@vishnudash7978 Same. Never risk getting hurt and going though that and deletion thoughts yet again
@@vishnudash7978 Hello introvert fellow 😅
@@weerawaree2844 hi
This only happened because u didn’t REALLY know her،
it’s sounds magical until you spend a long time with her.
this
Exactly! Later you find out she's not as untouchable as you thought she was. Especially when the Halo effect starts to disappear. This guy hasn't felt true love. If he really does end up falling in love with someone, truly in love for a LONG time and he fucks it up and she disappears, then he will realize the difference between that love, and whatever this is.
@@janmil5630 Sometimes there is nothing you could have done , I had a gf I'd always try my best to see things from her perspective I'd let her how much I loved her I'd go into detail about everything I liked about her I'd spk so much abt everything I loved abt her but never ran out of things to say, she started getting distant and I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt, at one point I tried to tell her how I felt she was getting distant she said she didn't know what I was talking about , not long after she left me for one of her male friends, I used previous relationships with girls to learn something new, look at every way I fucked up and would not do it again idk where I fucked up, that's probably why I think about her everyday tryna see my mistakes
100%. + There should be a new law presenting min 1 year of being with a woman to then can claim you know her.
Mostly that's the case
Flowers are not too much for a second date. You are a gentleman!
It's so good hear this from a guy who express genuine feelings. Even knowing if you are very young.
something like this has happened to me too. I couldn't believe that someone that I feel so connected to could not like me back. how could it have been so real but it isn't real on the other side? I still don't understand...
Other people are just mirroring our fears and beliefs about ourselves. If someone rejects you, ask yourself what parts of yourself are you rejecting and in what ways you are not loving yourself ❤
That one hitted hard
Girrrrrl he is taken
Let him go
Jett is mine
@daquieshakeaundra2854 all yours
@@dobrila5358 You a LOA person? I get you! This poor guy sounds like he doesn't have a clue about LOA.
Your life is your own friend, but if you choose to live a single life until 40 for fear of hurt, I'm afraid you may end up being a fairly uninteresting person if you go through life without truly experiencing it, you may also intentionally miss out on finding your person. Pain is a part of the ride, you cannot truly appreciate life without knowing it.
This is the first time I feel grateful for the TH-cam algorithm. I recently had a very similar experience with a woman, and the singularity of it made me think no one else could possibly relate. But it feels comforting to know someone else has been through the same thing. I still think of her, still have a soft spot for her, and I’ve rejected others because being with them just doesn’t compare to being with her. Even though I know she’ll never be mine, maybe our brains just struggle to comprehend how such an intense desire and candid love can be one-sided so we refuse to let go
Glad to know I'm not alone either. Wishing you all the best :)
Maybe it wasn't one-sided at first.
Have you heard of twin flames? Just a thought? 🤷♀️ The experience can be so strange, as you both describe…
This is probably not going to be comfortable for you to read but here goes. When you feel a load of intense emotion for someone, you need to manage that very carefully. You need to spend much smaller amounts of time together, to allow her feelings time to build and develop. Give her time to adjust to her own feelings. There is literally no downside to doing this, even if she appears to have feelings that are just as intense as yours. Basically, its almost impossible to go too slowly, but its extremely possible to go too quickly. You unlocked feelings in her that she was not equipped to deal with and she ran.
I'm so sorry this happened to you. ❤
A lesson I’ve recently had to learn at 48
That’s really good advice !
Things like that hurt a lot because you're not just sad over what happened, but also you're sad over what could've been. Also, its likely that she was really into you after the first date but likely had a fear of intimacy/commitment so the fact that you guys connected so well may have scared her so she shut her feelings for you off. I and many other guys have been through the same thing so I give you serious props for sharing, especially since not a lot of guys are open about this. I think another reason it hurts so much is because before something like that happens, you dont think it's possible for it to ever happen. But now you know, now you can date knowing that it's possible to get your heart broken, so it won't hurt nearly as bad. You handled this, so there's nothing else you can't handle.
Wow, what an amazing comment. Thank you so much. That means a lot ☺️
It’s New Year’s Eve and I’m and drunk and have no one no girlfriend no friends and my parents who are in their fifties who have a more exciting social life are out with their friends and to be truthful I feel really fucking sad and this is the realest shit I have ever seen someone post on the internet so thank you and God bless you brother. Much love. Next year is ours and we will find strength in God. Amen.
Raw, honest and relatable. Thank you for sharing this.
This is what love is like! It doesn’t last which is why it’s so special. Sometimes we’re separated by circumstances or even death. It doesn’t mean it’s not love no matter how fleeting! Honor your love because it’s so special.
What a beautiful comment 😊
this kind of connection REALLY changes you. something similar happened to me this year and I even cried when you said some things. the trust it’s that you can never forget these people, i haven’t forgotten him either but you just have to live with it even though you will keep them in your heart for the rest of your life.
Don’t worry brother. You aren’t alone. I still haven’t gotten over my ex going on a decade soon. Sometimes, no one else can beat the feeling and experience you had with a specific person. No matter how many dates and people who you’ve dated after that person. There’s always that one.
Ugh that's why I need a virgin guy like myself but where r they 😢
@ didn’t lose my virginity until 23. They are out there I promise you that.
Damn this makes me scared as a woman.. who knows the man you're dating nowadays might not be over his ex and pretends to love you. I've also heard this a lot of times that men never really get over their first love, they might still love you but will never love you as much as they loved their first love.. which hurts if you're dating a man who already had his first love then you'll never be his #1. I also was the first love of someone so ik what's up but I thought it wasn't universal but ig it is
Sometimes I think of going back to him rather than dating someone who already had his first love because the first love theory of men scares me
It is terrifying, as I’ve experienced it vise versa unfortunately as well.
Wow. This was the most vulnerable I have ever witnessed a man let himself be. You give me hope man!
This lady in your heart probably felt like it was too good to be true.. and also didn't feel worthy of it. We are complicated creatures.
You will love again. Your heart has been cracked open .. and I am sorry that you had to feel it so painfully. But it is the only way...
You will love again and be loved in return, and yes it's scary! But now you know.. it's the only thing worth living for. ❤
Thank you for opening up to the world.. many men will find solace in your words. Stay blessed 🌳
Thank you so much. You’ve made me tear up 😂
No it was her fault and she fucked it up. She won’t do it again. Next time the guy will be sure to have his heart not broken again
the felt it was to good to be true and not felling worthy of it is so real why are we like this
@@homiesenatep umm they only went on 1 date
unrequited love hurts so bad, I understand you and I don't want to experience that again but I believe that those things make us grow and that is good.
Im half way through the video, subconsciously expecting u to have at least a couple tens of thousands of subscribers. You conversate very eloquently and your honesty is inspiring. Im honored to be one of the earliest to have found your channel
Thank you. That truly means a lot. Really appreciate it ☺️
What your feeling isn't really love. It's limerence. To love someone means that they put you before themselves. She didn't do that, and you actually don't really know her very well. Limerence can make you think you know someone much better than you really do. What we tend to do in that state is only think about how we feel about them, not how they feel about us. In reality, women may say they want vulnerability, but when you put intense emotions on them quickly, they tend to run away. They fall in love a lot slower, so even though it can feel like there's this insane connection, divide that by 10 to get an idea of where she is at, even if she says differently. With women, they can fake a date and make you think its the best time they've ever had. They'd almost rather do that than have to reject you in person. Only her actions show her real motives. You should open up in the future, but it has to be at a healthy pace once trust is established first. That only comes with time and seeing someone's actions.
Thank you for pointing out limerence. It is not love.
Not really. people fall in love differently
You can't tell him what HE feels is not real! Everyone's journey is UNIQUE
@@Goddessv717 but apparently you can? Love isn't that unique. There's a billion dollar music industry dedicated to it. Yes, most men go through limerence. I've had it myself, which is why I know it when I see it.
Limerence is a part of falling in love, it's ok but he needs to be able to get over this phase and still love the person after hightened emotions of the limerence stage
She just highlighted unhealed wounds you already had inside. That's the purpose of heartbreak, to open our wounds for us to see them and heal them. And you already had a fear of vulnerability and intimacy and feeling of unworthiness. That's why you are so much in your mind, it's a defense mechanism to avoid feeling the unprocessed pain in your body. Heartbreak happens for our heart to open more. And you can't control life, real and magical life happens when you let yourself go and surrender for whatever comes your way. Your soul has a plan, but your ego is in fear and wants to control life. I am telling you this from my own life experience. You can't live life closed off. That's not living. You're living life by feeling it, not by thinking it. Wish you all the luck in the world.
Wise words. Feels like you have described me as a person. I had two very harmful experiences with dating which also showed me my unhealed scars. The bad thing is that I am completely pulling back now and that I do not want to get to know anyone. Has been like that for a long time in my life already, during my teenage years and now I am back at this state. I feel alienated even by the thought of dating someone. I think that I can't handle it. I let my mind rule my behaviour and I am too afraid to let anyone come close to me.
@@justasmalltowngirl4084 You have to heal your traumas, try meditating, connecting with your body, whatever brings you in your body. Try not to run from your uncomfortable emotions. Learn to sit with them when they arise, there will be a lot of crying, but it is necessary to release the pain. And relationships with other people are also important, because they trigger us for our own good. There is nothing to afraid, the more pain you release the more space for love and joy you will make.
I really admire people who dare to share such intimate feelings and experiences online. It helps other realize they’re not alone. This is called limerence. I suggest and hope you and others who can relate to this video have an open mind and look into it! Thanks for sharing. 🖤
that person we fell in love with feels like a drug. you’re so tempted to text them when you’re not supposed to and then end up doing it anyways. when they are no longer a part of your life, when you’re so used to texting them and such and those texts doesnt come in anymore, feels like withdrawal.
Aw, this was sweet, I can’t say I recommend your decided life path because heartbreak is not something you can avoid and schedule out of your life. I hope it works out and you find someone special guy
It's the loneliest feeling in the world, yet its this pain that unites us all. I'm 19 right now. I just got out of a 3 year relationship four months ago. Every prom, every holiday was experienced with her. I saw her every day for those 3 years. I gave up full scholarships to my dream schools for her. She broke up with me because we were having problems and I had a lot of really tragic things happen to me that made me emotionally unavailable. I watched her bring home a rebound relationship while I was moving out, whom she has been with since. Hearing them sleep together in the bed I put up for her was traumatizing.
Not how I wanted things to go, but this is how the story goes. The time was special to me. I miss it; I miss her. But I know I need to move on and be ready for when the next one comes. It sounds like it was special for you too.
Sending you my love and best wishes. So sorry you had to go through that.
damn that sounds terrible… if my ex slept with their new fling in the same house I live in, I would really question what kinda person they are.. afterall we can see what kind of type people are once they dont get any advantage from being kind to us anymore…😵💫
Jett, I’m 41 and have had so much heartbreak. But it’s part of life and you honestly learn and grow from it. You also learn about your self worth and value when you go through it.
You will probably break someone’s heart at some point without knowing.
You speak so well and seem sincere and genuine. You’re going to have a great life.✌🏽♥️
Thank you so much for your kind words :)
I feel like sometimes we mix between being in love with a person or with what the person makes us feel
I have felt heartbroken and rejected multiple times it’s literally such an awful feeling when you fall in love over and over again but no one reciprocates that feeling it really sucks but at the same time each time I feel like I learn more how to handle and control my emotions and it becomes less painful because I know deep down I will meet the right person one day and he deserves it too
Also being in love is peaceful and calm and safe I always keep reminding myself that feeling that euphoria at the beginning is usually a very bad sign.
Love creeps upon you slowly when you’re not even thinking about it at least that’s how I hope to fall in love the next time
Same. She was my mentor, really helped me get my life together. I'll never forget the lessons she taught me but I had to move on. Stay strong brothers.
Your words about her and the way you expressed your feelings were so heartfelt and beautifully articulated-thank you for sharing your experience. It resonated deeply with me because I’ve had a similar connection with someone. I’ve known him since childhood, and through random, uncontrollable circumstances, we would reconnect sporadically over the years. These days, we check in with each other occasionally through social media. Now, we live in different countries, and while we’ve both acknowledged feeling a strong connection, the barriers of distance and logic make it hard to truly understand each other as we are today. I’m not sure if what I feel is limerence or a genuine connection-especially since I’ve never felt this close to another human being-but hearing your story made me feel less alone. Thank you.
Went through something similar this October and it is so fkn painful. Even tho I know/understand that he wasn’t „the one” and was far from what he tried to sell me …my stupid heart can’t let go 😔 In the long run thinking about him so often only stops me from finding someone better…
oh man this is so relatable, it’s almost as though i could have made this video myself. it’s been two months since i last spoke to this person and i still think about him more than i thought possible. i feel silly for it but it meant something to me because i really let myself go for the first time.
Thank you for being so vulnerable on here. It's refreshing to see a man talk so openly about their feelings. I also see so much of myself in you, so hearing you pour your heart out really resonated with me on so many levels.
Obviously I don't know you, or the girl or what exactly the situation was. But speaking from my own experiences I can say this; if you are wholeheartedly sincere with someone and they pull away, it's usually because they don't know how to receive real love or genuine advances. Don't let bad experiences jade or harden your heart, because your warmth and sensitivity are what separate you (in the best way possible) from the insincere and deceptive "romance" that's so prevalent in modern dating.
The high degree of self-awareness you have is apparent, so my comment probably won't be giving you any profound insight that you aren't already privy to. But I want to say this regardless; I hope you will reconsider that "single till 40" thing. I understand wanting to protect your heart, especially after the painful experience you've had with your first love. But you'll never know the ecstasies that life has to offer if you only ever try to preserve yourself. Don't be afraid to give love, rather, learn how to give love generously, yet wisely. Be courageous in baring your soul to the world, because it's a beauty that deserves a center stage to be seen :)
Thanks for sharing, I myself have been going through something similar and it really sucked when I had to make the decision to put myself first and move on. Even though I probably did fall in love as well, literally just based on a few conversations and interactions. I truly thought that I had found the one everyone talks about, I was so sure that that was it. Then he would ignore me and left me feeling rejected, which is fine. Now I feel that real love doesn’t abound, or leaves you confused(in my case). But it’s a privilege to love regardless of how it ends. although the heartbreak was awful if I ever feel like that again for someone and they show up for me, I would do it all again.
People can only mirror back what you think of yourself
You get it ! He need to change his State and he abandoned himself in that relationship so need to go on a self love journey again
This can be a twin flame connection. Really once in a life time… you might be faxina DNOTS (dark night of the soul). I swear there’s a moment when all this suffering goes away 🙏♥️ this connection is about us, to heal ourselves.
Please elaborate more ❤
From the moment i started listening to him, my heart started beating faster than usual. I feel deeply this is what he'sexperiencing. Not many people understand. Only the few who have experienced it can relate to it. I send him love and light. He need to spend time in meditation/with God/source/universe and things will be made clearer for him.
Youre going to meet a lot of people throughout your life that'll make you feel like you know them...
Or youll hit it off so well right away...
It doesn't mean you need to be together..
You're a very good looking young man.. much better looking than the average guy.. not sure if youre aware..
Im sorry about what happened...
She wasn't your person.. might have felt that way for you but clearly it wasn't the case for her...
One thing I learned is... if they really wanted you, you wouldn't feel confusion..
You opened up.. got hurt.. please don't deny that part of yourself to someone that deserves it...
You CAN fall in Love in two weeks. Boundless. Thank you for uploading it and being 'vulnerable' in that manner. Virtue virtue virtue. Always feel your feelings when they come. They are your compass. Beautiful video.
Thank you so much :)
This is a beautiful video but yall need to look into the word “limerance” and ugh i relate to this vid so much i hate to admit it
@@AnjeaFilms I'm coming from the perspective of wanting to feel everything that life introduces. Being a home or safe passage to every emotion and finding beauty in it all
Really? This guy said he loves me and I was like are u serious ita been two days hehe😭
who ever this woman is better take a long look in the mirror cause the way he talks about her is the way I and many crave to be loved and seen
Whatever!
Yeah right lol. Y’all always throw the dudes who really care in the trash
The right one wont do that@@nathanhardman7143
Nah i don’t and i keep getting hurt by men who start by treating me so good in the beginning and then they end up treating me like shit in the end. People change
mourning someone you wish you knew better is so painful, but please don’t think too much about her reasons for falling out of your life, it’s not your fault. sending love xx
I appreciate your being so open to sharing this story.
I’m thankful for people like you who are willing to put themselves out there and share very personal stories like this. It helps so much to know that others go through this. I find it so interesting, fascinating really that very rarely, maybe even once or never for some, a person comes into our lives and completely turns it upside down and we have these unexplainable feelings, emotions or reactions. In times of pain, I try to remember that people come in and out of our lives along our journeys. Some are only with us for a short while, but they show us something about ourselves. They teach us something. Something we didn’t know or weren’t aware of. Like a mirror. It’s hard to realize that and see through the pain in the moment but looking back, it certainly makes sense. Not everyone is meant to stay. I wish I had realized this in my 20s and appreciated it for what it is.
Thank you for your wise and kind words :)
My ex bf had similar feelings as yours. 2 months ago i decided to broke up with my boyfriend. We were dating for about a month. I’ll be honest with you, I don’t love him anymore, but I don’t hate him either. One of the reasons why I decided to broke up with him is because he didn’t truly love me, he was still in love with the girl he loved when he was 14-15 (we’re 18 now), but they broke up because she moved to another country. When we were arguing online the day our relationship ended, I still loved him, but I just didn’t want to waste my time for the person who didn’t have those deep feelings as i had, that’s why I said to him that we need to break up. I clicked on this video because I wanted to understand what was happening to him (and probably is still happening to him now). He told me about this girl when we were already in a relationship, but I accepted his feelings, cus I wanted to relieve his heart from this pain by my love. I wanted him to start a new beautiful life without this girl, but it didn’t happen. Nowadays, I’m glad that I made this decision, because looking at him now (we study in the same group at university), I understand that he is not a good person. He’s an attention seeker, he sees women only as bodies, but I’m not mad at him, because now I don’t care anymore (but I won’t stay aside if he do something bad to girls from my group). Thank you for sharing your experience, I hope you will get better soon bro ☹️
Oh my...I started crying while listening to you because I felt this. I also have never been in a relationship because I never clicked with anyone before. However, I met this guy during summer last year and I did not fell in love at first. Still, i did feel so at peace with him that it was truly beautiful. He was a total gentleman and such a kind, sweet guy. I always felt so bored when talking to guys through phone but not with him. We went on a few dates during summer and tbh, he was the one who was probably more into me than I was. He sent me a lot of sweet messages and also while we went on dates, he initiated conversations about people knowing about us. Whenever we went out, we always talked for more than 5 hours. However, after one month, things changed after I told him I want a relationship in the future. After that, he changed his behaviour. He cancelled two dates, also because he felt sick. We then dated for two more months but it ended with him saying he is not ready to give his all into a relationship even though he is interested in me. It hurt A LOT, I cried a lot for two months and tbh, I still do. Maybe people will call it limerence and even idk what i truly felt. But the same as you, I know that was something I felt for the first time. As you mentioned, feeling so vulnerable sharing your feelings and then being rejected truly feels like someone just stabbed you. What really helped me is knowing that there are many people in this world who could be your good match when it comes to falling in love and relationship. The society is made to believe that there is just this one person who is your missing part and no one else can replace them. Of course, everyone is unique in it's own way. It is not like I am going to ever forget this guy cause he truly made so much impact on me. Although i cry because of him, I know that there are probably people out there who are just as much as good match as he was AND they will make our relationship work, not just for a few months but they will truly commit to me, whether seeing me sad or seeing me happy. Hope this helps :) Also, what helped me as well is that someone once told me that if you really like or love someone and you lost that person, whether platonically or romantically, take up one hobby or one kind gesture they did so you never lose that good thing they left you, which is becoming better version of yourself or just to become a kinder person.
Your story felt so heart-warming. I felt so happy for you and then I felt heart-broken for you. I think we've all been there. Thank you for sharing your love story.
your honesty is beautiful. sorry you were treated that way
Wow this is one of the realest and rawest videos I’ve come across thanks for sharing!!
Its interesting how you mentioned breaking the rules you set for yourself. It shows how, in the moment, our raw, authentic side often takes over... especially when things seem to be going well. This is exactly why we shouldn't be vulnerable at least when we first meet someone.
Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing your story. You never really know what someone is going through until they share their experiences. It’s nice to see this raw and sincere perspective
This is such a genuine and thoughtful perspective. Thank you for sharing. Nothing you said was cringe, feelings are not worthy of such judgement. Wonderful video.
Thank you so much 😊
"She made me realise what Love can do"
I feel you my friend
But I wouldnt wait til 40, you dont even know if you live that long
I love your vulnerability and your ability to reflect and share x
Thank you so much :)
so weird, that i saw your video today. i had a very similar experience in early 2022 with someone i met and dated for a few months and then ended because i had to move from the U.S. to france. i feel so strange, that i am still thinking about them all the time, i really appreciate you sharing this
You're describing the very same experience I had!! it's too powerful that it leaves one of the two more scared than the other and from there comes the blockage (a wall) I'm sure that's what happened to her she just got too scared cause that kind of feeling couldn't exist if it weren't mutual.
It’s so sweet watching man speaking this way🫠Your feelings are real, although once you let go the notion that it’s dangerous to let love happen in your life again and control, you will see and explore more about you and others.what’s true about love itself.love also heals and gives you different eyes to see but you need to let to experience both sides of it. As Rumi says: “ Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it“.
You can find love when you let life happen to you. Let your heart life dont protect it, he’s warrior he can heal while remembering taste of true love, and this love is first of all, the love of your being. What you experienced was refletion of your love, who you are. She was a mirror ☀️enjoy life
Thank you for being brave for saying all those words. Currently going through heartbreak myself. Stay strong and good luck on the healing journey. 💕
Thank you so much. Wishing you all the best :)
you're so incredible for being able to talk about your feelings like this❤
i learned something throughout my previous love experiences and that is "the potential you see in others is your own" , we don't love people because of who they are but because of who we are, i recognize myself so much in what you're saying.. i really understand you, but i wanna tell you you didn't know her, she isn't what you're imagining in your head, that is all the fantasy and like i said YOUR OWN POTENTIAL
you'll get through this and let me tell you love is much more than this experience, you don't know how good you'll have it with someone who'll love you back ❤
(and getting over someone with whom you never dated for a long time, or even never been an official partner can be particularly challenging, cuz you don't know how the bad moments would be like, YOU NEVER HAD ONES, ofc this situationship would be incredible next to the real thing, don't compare a fantasy to the real thing.)
Thank you for sharing such genuine feelings,
With this world getting so artificial is heartwarming to find such a treasure online.
I’m a very romantic person and finding your video is an affirmation that we all fall in love when least expected.
If many men were so real and authentic as u the world would be such a beautiful place for women ❤️. Sorry that u were brokenhearted. Any woman will literally fell in love with u instantly. You will find the right one for you. Don't give up
i share a very similar experience to yours, and the girl in your story sounded like me. i’d found someone who struck me immediately upon meeting and it felt very different. it felt very deep, like i’d known this person forever. we had linked up again a year after meeting, and it ended quickly due to insecurity and fear on my end. i was afraid they would leave me, so i left first (stupid, i know- it was trauma related and i was very young). what we found out years later was just how strong the connection really was- when i’d think about them deeply, they would reach out to me and vice versa. we had dreams about each other that would happened in real life. the whole thing was..outer-worldly almost. it felt spiritual. but we couldn’t be together unfortunately. i say all of this to say this: i believe you were meant to experience all of this for a reason. i realized how special some people are, and when you find someone that you connect with immediately, then they are meant to be in your life for a reason, whether it’s forever or for a moment. limerence or not- she had a profound impact on you, your heart, and probably your view on life and people. for me, it taught me that i only want to be with someone if the connection feels that deep again. i believe those who experience this are meant to have a profound love and to build profound connections. never think harshly of yourself or be ashamed from this and how you feel. she may have set the standard for you when it comes to love. you will find that kind of love again. god bless you, keep going
sorry for how long that is 😣 i want to add this too- not to get your hopes up, but maybe you impacted her the same way, and she was potentially afraid due to her own personal struggles. it’s possible she wasn’t ready. if i were you, i would reach out one last time and just say you hope she’s doing well. you never know what could happen. if she doesn’t reply or it doesn’t go well, i hope you hold in your heart the knowing that you will find a deep love again. i believe it’s meant for you. good luck ♥️
Seems like u came across a transformative connection, I've gone through one as well, and hecc it really reversed my personality. These kinds of connections are really intense and break apart when you're feeling insecure. Just continue working on urself
You are so adorable!! Keep being you! Your such a good story teller.
:) thank you so much!
omg thank you for sharing. listening to your story I understood something about my life that I couldn’t see until now
It's been a long time since I watched a video as intently as yours. This was beautiful, I hope you know that, and very very brave. This is why dating is hard, but especially while you were talking about the month long heartbreak I thought,that being true to your feelings was beautiful. It would have been beautiful if you had succeded and gotten together with her, but maybe it's even more beautiful in tragedy, bc that's why nobody wants to be honest and vulnerable, to net feel, to not get hurt. But you did everything right. It's a good reminder for me too, I just got hurt and the urge to close up is strong, but no, won't do it. Being hurt is part of it, not understanding too. I wish you all the best for future, hope you'll find your true love at 40
mythical video pull
She was not the one,She was someone god send her in your to wake up that beautiful feelings, do not give up to find the right one. Love is wonderful when we are with the right person.
if a girl is interested, trust me she will let you know :D but thing is, when a girl is the doing the first move, the guys are usually put off by that. I want a someone with whom I can do life, life in all its aspects, but it seems out of reach for the moment therefore I am focusing in myself and healing what i injured, which is myself. I am glad you shared this video, it helped me, I am watching some of those kinds of videos and they make me feel so lonely but I feel something healing in me. So Thank you.
Sometimes, it’s really not all about YOU. After hearing your story, I feel a bit in awe bc I don’t think I’ve ever truly loved or liked someone passionately, giving my whole heart. I’ve always played games to protect myself, so I wouldn’t get hurt or feel destroyed but looking back, I wish I had done more of what I truly wanted or expressed my feelings more raw and authentically. (I do have a fearful avoidant attachment)
Basically, what I want to say is that I think you’ve really enjoyed a part of your youth! Plus, I don’t want to sleep around or date too many ppl. I want to save my whole heart for the right person (: yay hehe
at first I really thought this was a fictional story and not that you lived through it because it’s rare for people to demonstrate that much vulnerability here, it was beautiful, I cried
Wow, thank you so much. Sending you my best wishes :)
I've noticed quite a few things in your vid as have many others, and it really boils down to this. Each of us possesses distinct personality traits and attachment styles, leading to varied emotional responses. Seeing that she represents many of your 'firsts', it's understandable that you've developed a deep sense of attachment to that 'feeling'. It's less about her as an individual and more about the 'potential' and the contributions you've made that highlight her uniqueness. This appears to be a classic case of limerence. Given that it's been years and you still express strong feelings, it may be an opportune moment to reflect critically here. Set aside personal feelings and approach such this with a clear perspective. The lack of response from her interprets as a sign of disinterest. If someone genuinely shared mutual feelings, you wouldn't find yourself in solitude without an explanation. Ghosting often reflects a person's reluctance to communicate their feelings, which can come across as avoidance. I'm not entirely convinced she was actually unwell; it could have been a strategy of sorts. Anyway, you come across as genuinely sweet, and it's evident that you have a kind presence. It's a bit unfortunate that you're not currently active in the dating scene, as I believe you would be quite appealing to many, myself included lol. 🫣I truly wish for your healing and growth, as you absolutely deserve it.
I was so invested. I loved your story, thank you for giving us a glimpse into what men can feel. ❤
Thank you so much :)
Woow. Thanks for sharing this. This happened to me when I was 16-19. I did a very self reflecting on why I loved them that much. I made deep thinking of the dynamic of our relationship and how we use to communicate. I relalized that she didn’t really open up that much to me. She was emotionally unavailable but never showed and she would act mysterious around me. I realized she wasn’t like that with others just me. Came to find out she was never genuine and that she was using me. She made herself so interesting by not sharing much whiles also acting that this isn’t one sided. She liked being loved and liked and being obsessed with. She was a narcissist. How I moved on was that I excepted the situation and I journaled and acknowledged the pain I felt and took it as a lesson. I also learned more about myself about things that I needed to heal from and work on like communication and my attachment style. I started being open to new relationships while’s also excepting that it’ll be hard at first but it’ll get easier with time. Now I see her around and I just don’t feel anything for them. Sometime I look back and I am just like I was so innocent and stupid to let someone overpower me the way they did without even earning my love for them. I let them consume me without them putting the work in. I realized that I loved a version of them that they made up and I also created in my head. That’s one of the biggest lessons of my life. You can move on from this woman believe me with time and healing you will. You lovable and are capable of loving a healthy person who is real and capable of creating healthy relationship with you. ❤
I like your openness and honesty. It is interesting how you thought about this girl for so long, after just that brief meeting. From a woman's perspective it was too much too soon. She may have seen that trait as being needy which is a turn off for both men and women. Rejection kills even in a casual relationship but you need to keep things in perspective. You sound like a sensitive and caring person, Tinder is probably not the place for you. Don't waste yourself though there are women out there who are looking for a genuine connection. Just want to add, don't pick girls up from their place on the first date. Meet in a public place, somewhere you would like to go and something you would like to do. Because even if the date doesn't pan out at least you had a fun outing.
Thank you for sharing 🥹♥️ that type of love is heartbreaking. I feel your pain.
love how you think, feel and you ability to express your feelings without taboo
Stumbled apon your video, what a courageous sharing, sent into internet space. I just couldnt stop listening. So from a woman perspective, huh and now i m 55, and still my feelings can go spinning. I just try to even the up and downs with a lot of meditation, breathing practices etc. But at 20-35 every thing could come tumbling down. Maybe it still can. So pleas dont think she stood you up. Maybe it was just too overwhelming for her. Off course so sorry she didnt cam back and give an explanation.
😢 A big hug for your broken heart ❤️🩹 love
Never stop talking about your feelings 😢
Great and honest video. More than likely she had intimacy issues which made her run and at the same time you came on too strong which scared her away, mistakes on both sides but that's life.
Thank you so much :)
I'm living a really similar situation rigth now. I met a girl a few months ago and i felt something special that i haven't felt before. I've been with other girls(though not to much), so i know how it feels when you like someone, but this time was different.
This girl and I spent the last 2 months dating every week. The second date, talked about our feelings and she told me she liked me back but had ended up a really really long relationship about a year ago, so she didn't felt confortable with begining a new one. She told me she wanted to keep meeting each other but as friends. And i felt so connected to her, so I accepted. Every conversation we had was like floating in the space, i felt that we were alone in the world. The ours we spent together felt like minutes, even seconds.
We continnued dating, and finnally, we kissed. It felt like no kiss has felt ever for me. We spend that whole afternoon together, hugging each other, holding our hands and talking about life. I asked her about us, and she told me that she wanted to keep dating me and that she liked me so much. I left her house that night feeling the luckiest man alive but everything turned so badly.
2 Days later i texted asking how she spent her weekend and she answered with a cold "Good". I got worried and asked if everything was alright, she told me she was worried about what had happened the other day, so i told her she could tell me anything she felt because I wouldn't judge her. Her response was "I dont fell confortable with this, i prefer to end this relationship". I was shocked, i didn't beg for an opportunity, i felt confused and hurt. It was like something stabbed me really deep inside, it really felt like a physical pain.
This was 3 weeks ago. I spent the whole Christmas holydays, asking myself what i did wrong, Why her feelings changed so fast and feeling that I wasn't enough. Now i have to see this girl everyday at college, and everytime i see her face, something twists inside me. She's acting cool, like nothing happened, but for me it felt special. I don't have any resentment towards her, but I can't look to her face because I remember everything and my world falls apart. I'd really like to keep her as a friend but i dont feel capable of doing it and not expecting something more than a friendship. So here I am now, dealing with the pain, seeing this girl every morning and wondering if i'll ever feel the same with another girl. I really hope the best for her but i'd like to put a world between us. I think i can get over this but it'll take me some time.
I felt very represented Watching your video talking about your experience. I understand how you felt that month you cried every single day. I really hope the best for you 🫂
Thank you for sharing. I had a guy break it for with me recently right before the holidays. I felt like I was just miss lead and used I did fall for him head over heals and him pulling away was extremely crushing. And I thought I had found something real for the first time in my life iv dated in the past but this felt different because he was someone I had history with. I guess am not thankful for the experience because it seems so disingenuate now. Like I was just a toy that was used for his ego. I don't really feel like he even gave me a real shot before he meet another woman at a wedding week within our get together. Am doing everything to try to move on put the pain feels so real. And everyday since Christmas I wake up hopefully the feeling will just disappear. All that to say thank you for sharing your heart.🙏🏻
I relate to this a lot! I went abroad on an exchange semester, didn't want to or mean to fall in love, but we don't control these things... Still hoping she will gather the courage to come here, even if just for a while, but I don't believe it's likely.
No, you’re perfect and ding the right thing. Open up when you know that you are ready for marriage. Wish all men are like you!
It was very courageous of you to talk on here about this painful experience. Take strength from knowing you learned important life lessons from this, and you can carry that new knowledge into your next love connections in a positive manner. You are a handsome, intelligent, feeling young man - your true love is going to cross your path. ❤
Boyyy I’m in this exact boat, he treated me like crap but I still want the best for him. I just need to remind myself to detach and remember the bad everyday
You know, I listened to your video hearing you say things like "i know it seems hyperbolic (to fall in love in two weeks, or to feel something powerful when holding hands) and i can't help but scream NO its not hyperbolic! It happens! It happened to me, it happens to many people, your feelings and your flowers weren't "too much", they were fine and its okay that you expressed them that way. It would have been ok if these feelings were not reciprocated, but she lacked courage when she ghosthed you. You WERE treated badly and you are allowed to feel sad/angry/shitty about this, and to cry for a month, and to still be haunted by this.
I hope that you can heal from this -but you are not too much, don't worry.
:O I was in your place for 4 years, and the tears lasted more than a month, and every day almost every second felt like it belong to him. Then he found a gf and my feelings for him stopped, right at that moment , so 4 years later I started talking to someone online, who lives nearby me, who is the total opposite of that first love, and I felt something strong for that dude too. But I had a lot of things to work on and I still do now, so it ended up by going no contact, I still miss that guy but the first love i felt is gone for good. No matter how much time it takes, just take your time, you'll feel sad and happy at times, it's normal, I am nobody to advice you because I still feel the need to work on myself first, but I can advice you to take your time. Just like I am taking the time.
It's like the saying:
I'd rather love the person I can't have than have a person I that cannot love.
I thought I was in love with someone because it was the early days, everything feels like this "honeymoon phase" which lasted around six months but then time wears that off, you see the flaws in that person, you have a sense of clarity when they fog is lifted. Turns out this "wonderful" person who I imagined the rest of my life with was an alcoholic (hidden from me) who was using me because they were an addict. Sometimes what we perceive as love is nothing but a crush, it feels good at first, you have all that excitement but then the reality kicks in. Sometimes, people don't show you their true self until you're deep in
Ohh my godd, I feel you . The " being afraid of liking someone who wouldn't feel the same " part 😢 ive had issues with trusting people bec im afraid they'd hurt me (mostly bec of a bad friendship i had recently and seeing failed relationships around) and I was talking about it to a friend and that I'd rather be alone.my friend told me something and it stuck with me, she said "maryam you'll meet amazing people in life but if you don't give them a chance in trusting them , you'll never know good people at all " still scared but I think I've let some people in and I didn't regret it 🥹
Thank u for this video i almost forgot that men can love too beyond just the physical part.
Yeah you don't want to date because you fear rejection and after what happened with that girl you fear feeling that way ever again, personally as someone a fair bit older I think its entirely silly that you feel so strongly about this girl, especially when its more than likely that shes forgotten you completely, i'm not saying this to be mean its just most likely the case, you can meet someone and get on really well but it doesn't mean the connection is significant, at the end of the day based on what you've said you are basically both strangers to eachother, furthermore the idea of not dating until you're 40 is insane you will miss out on so much out of fear and insecurity, I hope this is abit of tough love to get you thinking mate good luck!
Appreciate it. All valid points :)
@Jett-25actually i think she feels exactly like you and will be so sad you to not act on it.
Basically you will lose the love of your life.
i am almost 30 years, and trust me, you can like a person in many ways. But love ….. that’s oane in a life time.
Yes 40 is insane. I can’t imagine ever settling down with a man who is 40 years old who hasn’t learned critical life lessons you learn while going through relationships. I have dated and have had long breaks and been married. I dated an older man with no children even but I greatly greatly appreciated the fact he had been in previous long term relationships because he knew exactly how to treat me. He wasn’t perfect but he had been taught or learned lessons that I benefited from. Other people would say why on earth would you date someone so much older but that is the reason. All the things you are feeling, can be felt right now!! You could be doing all these things with a sweet loving girl and experience it with her while you are both young and it will be special. An older woman will not be impressed because she has been through that phase and will not want to train a man. A younger woman who isn’t using you for money will want you as an older man because he knows exactly how to handle and exactly what he has in his fingertips and usually appreciates you sharing your youth with him. Just saying please please please live your life and have these experiences before you regret it.
It could be true. She may have wanted you to chase her depending on her own wounding & stuff. I think you gave enough space (3 years!) that’s it’s safe again to experiment with reaching out if you can. Also, if you’re at peace with the thought of being rejected outright. I don’t think she would ghost you again… there’s a good chance she received karma about that simply because of how she left you feeling with no explanation. It usually happens that way (as someone who has been on both the receiving & giving end of this behavior). Now, I only ghost someone if they’ve been undeniably disrespectful.
super honest and raw. loved it man! Just keep being you on the videos. my opinion at least
I think I've never related more to a TH-cam video. We'd known each other for 3 months. It's been 2,5 years since it ended and I still think about him every day
They touch the depths of your soul
Hey.
Thanks alot for sharing such a delicate thing.
What I can say is, I've been there and I just felt like telling you something I have felt within me after this kind of experience.
JUST BE. Let go when you can and if she pops up in your mind again tell yourself even add expressions if you can, how amazing it is to have been alive to experience that in every fabric of your being, you got to see that part of you you never imagined possible. And then say, but part of truelove is letting go, you showed you loved her by letting her go by the way, that was huge. You placed her above your own desires❤ and that's just real. Back to what I was saying, like waves, allow yourself to flow with what you experienced and just being exactlyas you are now and whats to come. FLOW. It is well. I know this is long but bear with me. Everything happens for a reason and you are teaching yourself to surrender with the motions of life with the fact that you didn't force anything you just loved. By the way you need to really thank yourself for being that brave and selfless and just truly in love. Another thing is Love is never ending, eternal and pure and true, you might not want to hear it now but you will always have love coz you are love itself. You having experienced that is proof, YOU ARE IT. And whether it ends up being someone else or not, let's not even think of who it could be, just be. Experience love, grow it , nurture it, embrace it. Whether its love with someone or love of nature, love of family, love of your amazing self, it doesnt matter just LOVE. don't have to think about anything. But you are love itself ALWAYS KNOW THAT. AND REALLY....APPRECIATE THAT. So yeah just flow. If there are days you break, honor that break by allowing yourself to feel it and cry if you want to coz what you felt and what happened, you need to honor your heart and feel those emotions and talk to it as well. Coz IT REALLY SHOWED IT WAS LOVE.
Mine took 5 years and while coming out of it, that's what I did. I spoke well about the situation and felt gratitude for such an experience even if it didn't even start let alone end(that's my experience) I learnt and saw what love was and I grew and grew with the love that was still around me and the one still within(selflove) I can honestly say I view love in a whole other way and meaning. And it could never truly leave me even though someone leaves.
I knew then that my power to love was real. And somehow right now that's enough.
Anyways all the best dude.
And you are dang strong💯. Peace❤
Thank you for sharing. I have experienced the same and ended up with the love of my life five years later.
@emuhu001 "I would dare wish..*he* felt like I was the one..but me myself..I'm unable to accept this concept of him not having full control of his will..So if this is the freedom you craved to own my deceased jasmine dragon..so be it!❤".-
With someone else?
@user-kp3rc4eq8x No the same guy. It didn’t work out the first time we tried dating. Then five years later we reconnected and have been together for four years now. Happily.
The level of attraction has nothing to do with the duration of a relationship. It is not even necessary to be in a romantic relationship to feel very strong for someone.
It was very lovely listening to you
You will get over her.
Your accent bro😭❤️ im in love already 😫😭
Thank you. I’m suffering from a person that shared that type of experience with me. It hurts so bad.
When I was younger, I met a guy that made me feel some type of love for the first time. It was so unfamiliar for me, I wasn’t used to those feelings. I dated him for a month and left him for someone that I felt this obsession for, who later turned out to be abusive and showed me zero love. But that was familiar for me and I chose it. I wasn’t ready for anything real, I was too damaged to choose a healthy person. I often remembered the first guy and felt regrets, also I saw that he met some other girl and has been with her for years, so good for him. I made a few more mistakes before finally meeting my soulmate and I couldn’t be happier. If I hadn’t made a lot of bad choices before, I would have never met this person I am with now. It was magical, so many coincidences had to happen for that. So whatever happens, I believe that there is a good outcome for anyone when the timing is right. So please, let yourself experience life and meet new people, let yourself be loved for real, and you won’t have any doubts and anxieties when it’s real love.