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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 19 มิ.ย. 2024
- 5 Signs You Might Have Nonbinary Dysphoria
In todays video, I talk all about signs that you might have nonbinary gender dysphoria. This video takes a look at just some of the most relevant signs and ones that I wish I knew about when I was questioning if I had gender dysphoria. Be sure to like comment and subscribe!
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Growing up in a religious family definitely made me notice gender more. Even though I’m agender I can relate to some of this stuff.
Yeah I've definitely had to unlearn a lot about the stuff I was taught was I was younger from that religion but I'm happy I was able to grow from it
It must make it so much worse! I grew up with a super liberal picture of what men and women can be and do, and still didn't really end up connecting with either.
What’s the difference between NB and agender? I’ve been researching but I can’t find a clear cut answer *~*
@@Columbo453 To my understanding agender is someone who doesn't have a gender identity. Non-binary is more of an umbrella term, that basically means all gender identities that are not clearly a man or clearly a woman. Could be different thing for different people. For example, both man and woman in some degrees, something in between them, or something else outside the men-woman spectrum. To me being both non-binary and trans masculine / trans guy means that I'm not a woman, but also not completely a man.
@@Columbo453 Some identify as both, but non-binary can be a broader identity.
Non-binary people aren't necessarily agender. Some have a gender, or sometimes have a gender, or partially have a gender. It can vary.
Also, not all agender folks identify as non-binary
I don’t think that I’m trans, but I’m more comfortable with having a lot of body hair, wanting short hair, and sometimes wanting male characteristics. I’m still questioning my gender but I’m comfortable with she/her pronouns
just remember that pronouns dont equal gender! You can be nonbinary and use she/her you can be a man and be comfortable with she/her, even though it is uncommon its not impossible:)
Or gnc
Hear me out…. You’re just a masculine woman and that’s fine
Men don’t have a monopoly on abundant body hair or short capital hair. I wish there were more social acceptance of women who had those characteristics.
desfem woman exists and it's ok too
I am a Gen-X enby and grew up in the 1980s with no knowledge of gender or trans people or that the name for my feelings was physical gender dysphoria. I am now living a life that I never dared dream was possible. I transitioned physically in 2020 and socially in 2022. Thank you to all the brave queer people who made my new life possible, and thank you Lynn for educating people and sharing your story! ❤🏳🌈🏳⚧💛🤍💜🖤
:) happy to hear your story,, keep being awesome & thanks for sharing!!
hearing from older trans / nonbinary folk is some of the most helpful stuff. Thank you so much for sharing this. As a 20 year old closeted trans person going THROUGH it right now, it really makes life feel more worth it to hear from people who have been walking this walk longer than I have. You are living proof that it's possible, chatter, thank you for your comment and sharing that you are gen x. It truly truly helps people like me who struggle with internalized transphobia/internalized hate. I'm moving out on my own for the first time in August and I really look forward to changing my life and finding some LGBT community. Thank YOU for being so brave and sharing this with us. Representation can save lives!!!
I definitely relate to having social dysphoria. I always hated dressing up to fit an expectation that related to being an "elegant lady". I was raised as a girl, but I felt like I was playing a role I wasn't meant to be like whenever I get told that I have to wear makeup for every event I go to. I also hated being called a lady too because it was a term related to those negative experiences of being forced to look stereotypically feminine. This is why I turned to alternative fashion to express my gender to be in clothes that I like. Being non binary has given me the opportunity to wear anything that I want within reason no matter what day it is. I feel comfortable whether I'm wearing an oversized sweatshirt and skinny jeans or a black skirt with chains on it and a jewel toned lace top. I've been more chill about wearing skirts and dresses again, but only whenever I choose to wear them.
I'm currently really struggling with whether I'm non-binary, gender-fluid, gender apathetic, or just gender non-conforming. I really, really wish there was just a simple way to be like "yep, that's who I am"
When I looked into asexuality, I immediately realised that it described me perfectly. I wish that I had that same experience for gender because AHHH it's so confusing
same! It is really confusing because it is clearer definitions for something like asexual, for me it's like I never wanna have sex, tada easy, but gender can feel like such a vague social construct it can be hard to find label that fit and clearly define, which can be totally cool! You can just be you! no labels required! but can be tricky to explain to others and find a community similar
I grew up in a time when structures were much more set in stone and whilst this caused problems for many who didn't fit it did provide a pretty solid basis from which to operate. I was one of those who didn't fit and was able to find common course with others to challenge the orthodoxies of the day. And in my lifetime many of those structures have shifted and changed in ways that benefited me.
But I do wonder if I was luckier than today's generation who are growing up in a structure free environment where each person has the freedom to define their own social structures and identities and then I suppose fight to get them recognised by everyone else around them. It does seem to me at least a more lonely and isolated exercise. Don't get me wrong. Even in my rebel group (gay) I don't quite fit perfectly but I found a way to live with the imperfect match between the social identity and who I really was.
@@JonathanJimbo I think the balance is to be found in pragmatism. I think there feels like there is a this battle to the death going on between those who argue 'this is the way things are' v those who argue 'things are whatever anyone wants them to be'.
Existential angst (and despair) is probably part of the human condition. We all have our struggles to reconcile our individual experience with the picture of the world others present to us. But being social animals is also part of the human condition and we need somehow to be our unique authentic selves while playing our part in the group. Sorry to say this doesn't go away with but hopefully we become more relaxed about it all. And in the mean time there is so much joy and pleasure to be had.
You could use the umbrella term genderqueer
Be a triple a battery. AAA
I once tried going to a Mormon church, and it was friendly until I was put in the “men’s meeting” where they told me about my special role as a man and they wanted me to lead them all in prayer and I flatly refused and I never went back. I didn’t know I was nonbinary yet, but that was such a strong dysphoria!
Literally all of these are relatable, rip-
Regarding bathrooms, I don't mind using the women's ones cuz I know I'd get super uncomfortable and feel unsafe in the men's one
I started to question my gender identity some time ago. First I'd say 'something female, idk' cuz I didn't feel connected to the male gender at all but I felt a kind of disconnect to my assigned gender too. By now, I'm mostly sure I'm some kind of agender which makes me a AAA-battery now haha
Being AAA is the best. You just say "no thanks" to everything society says you should experience. I got the deluxe version tho so I am AAAAu (AroAceAgender Autistic). Just collecting all the A's.
@@silentglacierfang Me too, I consider myself peer reviewed AuDHD (various of my friends have and tell me I do too-). And then there's also anxiety.
...So it might be AAAAAA
@@Moonshine_Victory You got the ultra-deluxe shiny edition.
@@silentglacierfang Seems like it haha
Although honestly I'd rather not
Haha, love that others collect A's too. I'm AroAceADHDAgender and on the Aphantastic spectrum:D I used to hate it, but recently I began to feel pride for the first time. :)
Your channel is underrated in my opinion. When i first watched you i just had figured out i might not be straight and as i got to know myself better i found myself returning to this channel whenever i needed some information about different types of sexualities/gender identities or generally comfort and validation. Love from an aroace, sapphic nonbinary being
Oh my god this made my day thank you so much! I'm so happy the content has helped you😊
Totally agree! This channel is an amazing resource of knowledge!
Same here! ☺️
@@lynnsaga1397I’ve had the same experience and have to say, I like your voice pre-T. I can’t wait to see you feel more comfortable with yourself as you progress. ❤
I grew up in a pretty gender neutral environment, where I wasn't taught many gender norms. I didn't feel dysphoria around playing with "girl toys" because I just saw them as toys.
Many years later I came out as trans (I'm nonbinary but use he/him pronouns, so I came out as a trans man to avoid confusion) And this fact of my past was used to invalidate me. "If you're really trans, why did you play with girls toys?" Was asked to me by my mom. The very person who taught me that there is no such thing as a "boy toy" or "girl toy".
I just didn't see gender in anything. It explains why my dysphoria started only after I started school, where the environment was very gendered. I think if my environment was heavily gendered at home, I'd probably feel dysphoria sooner.
thank you for sharing this. I am 20 years old, pre transition, but I have been actively in the closet for almost a decade. I relate to how you identify, honestly. For me, I grew up with extremely defined gender norms, with pink everything. But the thing is, I find hyper femininity fun and enjoyable, to a certain degree STILL. It is not my personal style, but I like it enough that my whole bathroom is decorated pink just for funsies. I also find feminine things attractive on my partner. But the thing is that though I feel SO STRONGLY as a person or man, I find myself in the same demographic as like, "the girls gays and theys" in that I'm not like, a chad frat guy. It's so hard to validate yourself when social norms and people's different experience with them make you question everything. Thank you for sharing this.
One cause of dysphoria for me was watching my sister hit puberty. We’re both AFAB, but our experiences were so wildly different that it made me question my gender identity. My sister got into all the traditional girly things like boys and makeup, but the thought of both makes me extremely uncomfortable. Doing traditionally feminine things with her like nails or clothes shopping caused instant discomfort and confusion for me. Like she actually became a woman in puberty, but I just didn’t. Idk if this makes sense or if anyone can relate but oh well.
I relate to that very well and the of ever being pregnant and did a permanent solution for that and I am glad I did
I feel this but in the opposite way. I am afab, and I have a amab brother who is younger than me (also an older one). Though watching my older brother go through puberty didn't cause many issues for me, as it was the same time I went through my own female one, it was watching my little brother essentially go through everything that I wished I had had that sent me into quite a Time. My little brother is pretty masculine but he has tons of girl friends, guy friends, and even quite a bit of LGBT friends. But he looks enough like me, and we have a similar enough clothing style that my jealousy is just through the roof. It's so hard not to feel resentment, but I think once I come out to my brothers, maybe this could change. I only have two siblings and they are both assigned at birth male, and so naturally this has left a sense of guilt with me, in feeling like I'm letting my mom down. I was the pink baby, and I even really liked pink and girl stuff growing up, which made it extra confusing to even realize I'm trans. But what I want to tell my mom is that I will still be her pink baby, because the way I see it, I'm in the same demographic as women, the same demographic as " the girls gays and theys". Though I only feel really comfortable dressing masculinely, I love a little sparkly eyeshadow, I love piercings and Jewelry, and I grew up as a dancer, so there are so many conventionally women's interests which I love, and I also have a genuine respect and appreciation for women that quite honestly I do not really have for men. To a degree I'm one of those people that kind of feels frustrated by men, and to a degree I almost feel guilty for "joining them". I'm not fully sure how I identify, whether I just feel like a person or I do feel like a man entirely. But I completely felt what you said about your sister. It's such a difficult thing to deal with, and I truly appreciate reading your experience. As someone kind of going through it right now with no friends and and no real ties to the LGBT community or the trans community, finding videos like this and reading comments like yours truly keep me going. It's so hard to feel valid in a world that quite literally doesn't want you to Simply exist. So much love I hope you have a great day, thank you for sharing this.
I wish I could just pick a label. Gendervague is the best I’ve found, but it still feels itchy.
I've never heard of that gender! It can take awhile to find something that fits and it's ok to take your time with your journey
I feel this 😔 I am confused about labels and I'm thinking agender but I'm still unsure. I've never heard of gendervague so I will look into that label!
@@Translucentmoonlight hmm I’m think about agender. Thanks for sharing.
First world problems. Honestly, if you look back on this in 10 or 20 years you are going to cringe with embarrassment.
@@user-jf3lo6ss2i no, I don’t think I will. I’ll probably look back at it and honor it as a part of my developmental process for becoming a self aware human. Just like how I can look back right now and honor where I used to be. 10 years ago, I was in college questioning my sexuality. It took me several years to realize I was pansexual - gender or gender expression has no bearing on my attraction to someone. I’m really glad I took the time to reflect and get to know myself. And I also honor that 20 years ago, in 5th grade, I was enjoying being included in the social sphere of my class for the first time, and it was instrumental in building my social confidence, even though looking back I think I was being bullied - a small step up from being ignored as the quiet kid in class. I’m glad to have been included and I’m grateful I was too socially illiterate to know I was being given negative attention.
I can either belittle all of my upper middle class childhood experiences for being “first world problems,” or I can honor that my experiences, regardless of personal privileges and disadvantages, brought me to who I am today, and will continue to develop me into who I will become.
Though perhaps, you might look back and cringe at how you belittle others’ healthy self development. The times I have willfully or ignorantly misunderstood people are indeed the moments I look back on and cringe most.
As someone who is AFAB, I relate so hard to the whole “girl” thing. Even as a kid, that word made my skin crawl, but even more so now that I’m an adult.
As an Enby myself, I had to understand that when I'm out in public and someone calls me he/him, they're not doing it to hurt, they're trying to be formal or get my attention.
Hope your top surgery goes well Lynn! 💛🤍💜🖤
I get mostly dysphoric when being missgendered, and it has been so since I was little. I get super happy whenever there's a gender neutral restroom available. I do think I might be NB.
That was a very good list, thank you Lynn.
Hi. Thank you for your videos! This one was really good to stumble upon, and now I'm going to go back thru the rest of your catalog. I'm still very new to this journey. I'm questioning. I'm landing on Non-Binary right now. There's a lot of discovery happening right now with my identity, and since I'm in my mid 40's I'm fighting major imposter syndrome too. But this feels right. Your videos are helping give me some perspective and maybe even a feeling of community. I look forward to more!
I'm so happy my content is helping! It's amazing that you're going on this journey and if I can help even a little bit it in helping you be more comfortable with yourself that's the most important thing.
Just wanting to say 👋🏻 as another person in their mid-40.
It’s funny because I’ve spent years saying I had a mild form of dysmorphophobia before I had the words and understanding to know it was gender dysphoria.
Yeah I’m in the south and it’s very triggering regarding dysphoria. Hope top surgery goes well!
Recently I’ve been experiencing all of these points that you’ve talked about. I’ve been questioning my gender identity and now I’m leaning towards nonbinary. I don’t mine using feminine pronouns, but I realized that I don’t fully identity as a “woman” and I like using gender neutral pronouns too. I’ve been learning more about gender dysphoria and how I’ve been experiencing it. Thank you for making this video and I will definitely be watching more!
Thank you for the video. I just love your videos!
Tha k you so much! I'm really happy you like the content😊
@lynnsaga1397 I'm starting my transition from mtf and exited about the journey!!
@@JohnBarfield-qw3bhgood luck on your journey! 🏳️⚧️
@@Iamveryboredrn thank you!
watching from Brazil. Really love your videos!!!! Helped me a lot!!! ❤❤
Oh my god thank you so much for watching!
I'm getting my top surgery in June and it's really exiting but also making me nervous. Hope you'll get yours too and document your experience in some form :)
ohhh that makes sense, there can deffo b mixed feelings. i hope it goes well for you & i'm happy for ya!!
Can relate to the social dysphoria, anytime I’m out and about no matter how I dress I’m referred to based on the characteristics of my sex and since it’s always those little interactions that only last maybe a minute or two I don’t really see a point in correcting if I’m never gonna see the person again. At least for me I notice it’s not my body I feel dysphoria around rather the assumptions made about my gender based on the appearance of my body and I’m not really the kind who feels the need to modify it to pass or seem more androgynous.
Growing up I never agreed with the feminine expectations that were thrust upon me. I have always had both traditionally masculine and feminine interests growing up and when I thought about gender back then I just hated the idea of being thought of like a girl. I still feel this way now. I didn’t start questioning my gender until I realized I was ace and started thinking about my gender. I also feel like I do have dysphoria about my body. Especially around my breasts because they are so big and prominent and obviously feminine(I also have chronic back pain which makes me hate them more).
I feel like I’m floating somewhere in the nonbinary space but I still see myself as being partly a woman. I still like feminine things and will likely wear dresses to formal things because they are pretty. I know that interests and clothing don’t equate to gender but what I’m trying to say is that I still feel partly aligned with femininity while also sometimes not being feminine. I think I’m genderfluid in some way. I recently learned the term demigirl and I feel like that best describes me but I am still not sure if I will adopt that term.
I think I want to go by she/they pronouns but I am too scared to ask my friends to use them. Not that they won’t support me but because I feel like I made too big of a deal coming out as ace. I asked my friends a lot of questions about queerness before and now I’m hesitant to talk more about it. I’m sure I’ll tell them eventually but for now I am just keeping this for myself.
You are either xx or xy. You are a woman. It's normal to not like your body esp during puberty. you can be a woman and not completely related to "girl stuff" bc it's all based on stereotypes. You can't feel like a man or a woman bc it's just based on stereotypes! Don't let ppl like this confuse you. Be whoever you wanna be, present the way you wanna present but you will always be an xx chromosome (woman) but you don't have to act like a stereotypical woman. We are just human beings
I know a lot of big chested girls who don't like their breasts, it's all part of puberty and you can always get a reduction when yku are older if you want to. If you have issues with ur body please seek out therapy esp bc of ur chronic backpain xx
Ik my comments will get hate but honestly I hate seeing young girls being confused about their gender when it's just puberty making them hate their body.
Bit of an odd thing I've never heard anyone else describe:
As long as I can remember (we're talking early '90s, kindergarten, long before I had any vocabulary to describe myself as nonbinary or agender), calling *other people* by gendered pronouns or referring to them as boys, girls, men, women, whatever, felt intrusive and rude. I didn't have the frame of reference to realize that was me projecting *my own* dysphoria onto other people. Implicitly assuming that everyone felt the same tinge of discomfort when referred to in gendered terms, because "obviously" we all secretly feel weird about this gender thing that has been foisted on us without our consent. So throughout my childhood, I would either try to avoid talking about people in the third person or refer to them as "person" or mumble pronouns...implicitly because that's what I would have preferred for myself. I also distinctly remember in school, when we were learning about Swedish pronouns, I noticed the third person singular personal box in the diagram was empty, and so I put my hand up and asked about it, and the teacher said there isn't one because there isn't a context where you'd need one, and I found myself disappointed and thought to myself "I could probably think of lots of contexts where it would be useful". Eventually I had to just get used to referring to people with gendered language, and now I find myself accidentally misgendering fellow nonbinary people accidentally out of habit, and I hate that I do that, because I learned that habit reluctantly in the first place, and I would much rather be in the habit of using gender neutral language by default, since that's what I've always preferred (and it should be easier than it's ever been, with more pronouns and everything).
I relate to all 5 but that's no surprise! Thank you for making another useful video! You're the best!
thanks for sharing!
yes, I am glad you do acknowledge that your body is yours and should be loved no matter what.
:)
Your statement that even if you have a woman's body you don't have to force yourself to associate with it - is and damn true, I think! Thank you for talking about this and sharing your experience. I hope, this video will help confused people like me with self-determination, on the path to comfort and agreement with their body and reason.
🙌🏻✨😭
I never had dysphoria really, just trying to be a cis male in a cis world
oh wait euphoria happened guess I'm queer now, those are the facts (I am devastated to know I cannot wear the spinny for fear of judgement and potential harm to myself and those around me)
I feel lucky to not experience as much dysphoria myself. Really, the worst I feel as AMAB is when people told me to not cut off my arm hair and not try to change my voice because they perceive it to be better, like someone telling me that I have a really good and deep "storyteller" voice that I shouldn't try to feminize.. yeah, I'm not really upset by it, but I do have an AFAB non-binary friend who is much more affected by dysphoria. We haven't really got into talking about the topic beyond me just always silently paying attention not to cause any of that dysphoria, but based on body language around others I do think it makes them uncomfortable to get many compliments about gender specific physical traits, so I'm really glad you talk about it in your videos so I can understand it better while hearing it from someone who is in the same shoes. You are really cool and and honest about everything. I don't think I ever commented on your videos, so I just wanted to tell you this. Thank you for being here!
My niece tried to get me to understand some of what you were talking about. I'm not fully there but I'm trying to learn
Thank you for this. You put it so well for the way it feels.
Thank you for this video, it makes me feel better to know that I'm not alone. I been feeling like a trans nonbinary for many months now, however my family doesn't approve of this and sees me as a full blow girl or woman but I don't see it myself and it makes me feel very uncomfortable being around family who misgenders me and doesn't understands me.
I have the same with my chest and am looking for a good binder to see if that makes a difference. I'm definately in menopause now, which means my estrogen crashed and because of that my hormonal balance feels so much better than it ever has. I guess if i were younger i would probably have opted for a light dose of testosterone, but now that's not needed. I still struggle with dressing how i want in public. Last time i did there was a lady who had all kinds of questions. She wasn't disrespectful, just curious but after answering quite a few of them it got pretty exhausting. Now that makes me a little anxious to dress the way i want in public again, as i don't want to have those conversations every time i'm out. I just want to enjoy myself.
Recently discovered I'm agender/nonbinary. I've always reacted strongly against gendered language and societal roles. I've always admired and celebrated queer/trans and gender nonconforming people. I've always had an aversion to the term "man" and never really related to the concept of manhood, regardless of sexual orientation. My only dysphoria involves social interaction. I actually find joy in my medium sized hands and feet. And my middle range singing voice. Masculine pronouns have started to bother me a little, but I know I present mostly masculine. Because that's all I've ever known. I'd like to expand my style a little outside the constraints of gender expectation, but don't really have an urge to feminize myself much. 🤔
thank you, as someone who's been lowkey doubting their own gender for the last couple of month, this has reminded me the ways in which my struggle is real
There was an metaphor or something I saw in a video about a similar topic and it was like wearing a shoe on the wrong foot and somehow that helped me understand how uncomfortable gender dysphoria must feel. I never really had much of a connection with was makes a “woman,” despite having feminine features. By adulthood, I was slowly starting to not like being viewed as a “woman” like why should I be judged for my gender? I remember being salty over how the arrangement of graduation gown being gendered (red went for boys and girls had white) because I wanted to wear red. I’m glad that I can identify as Demifem where I can be seen as partly feminine in nature and not defined by what I have “down there.”
It's good to hear you are gonna be able to take steps to feel better and more comfortable
I'm looking to learn more about non-binary & grey gender as I think it may be an underlying factor in my difficult mental health all throughout youth and the confusion I still have around my own gender identity, it will take alot of self-exploration but videos like these really help 💛
I had gender dysphoria for a period of time and didn't have any help cause of homophobia in the family. It was mainly just being scared and confused cause I realised I wasn't straight, I just started an all girls secondary school so. I'm still female (I am cis) and I think I'm biromantic and asexual, I don't fully know though as I've never had a crush and the idea of the thing scares me so that's where I'm at for now. 😅 I kinda just ranged but oh well 😂
I can relate to pretty much everything, in this video. Thanks, ever so much. 💛 🤍 🖤 💜
It caught my attention that you said you were gonna start with a low dose of T. I don't know much about this topic. Can you take "not so much" T? Like I thought you either took it or not. I personally would like to have more narrow hips and a lower voice but I wouldn't like to have a beard, lots of body hair etc. Could someone explain to me about this? Thankyou 😊
As a non-binary person, I don't like having hairy arms/legs/body... also my facial structure sometimes, I don't know, it's weird. I hate feeling like this because I know my body is valid, but it is what it is. Love your videos, I learned a lot about my identity.
And for the first time in my life, I found a kind comment section
It's filled up with transphobes now. :_)
The thing figuring this out is that, like you said, being refered to as a woman is weird, and as a man it's the same thing, but at the same time, for me at least, boy and girl does feel ok (one or another in different days and in different levels, usually, but still) ???
Like, feeling and being refered to as a woman it's kinda okay but it feels like something it's missing, if that makes sense...
i never felt discomfort w/ my body growing up (e.g. i have pretty small chest and going to puberty i actually thought that they could be bigger, but idk if these thought are from pressure to look a certain way or my real feelings), but now, in my 20s that i started to question this and feel extremely discomfort about it. This makes me question a lot if i'm really nb or just a girl who doesn't comfort w/ the expected "look".
And outside of appearence, i always did like stereotypical feminnine, girly things, and i think that if i was born a guy i would still like this stuff, so i always get me thinking "well, maybe this is wrong and you're just pretending, and you're cis, lol"
idk if anyone ever felt this way or can give me a hint of wtf i't's going on, so i'm leaving this here.
And by the way, this hair look SO GOOD on you!! It's been a while since a saw another video from you so i didn't see this before, but this hairstyle fits perfectly on you (and the blonde strokes on the front too!!), fr
This haircut kills me every time 😍😍😍
Hey I’m Noah 21 and non binary :) I grew up in a very very open, supportive, loving and caring environment! My parents always supported me and loved me for who I was. As a child it was noticeable that I’m not like the other boys nor girls I was always kinda different. I played with dolls but also with action figures. I used my mom’s makeup and played in the dirt. I liked boys a lot even as a child. When I started playing video games at the age of 13 I think I started using a different name cuz mine always felt wrong and i didn’t like it, so I started using Noah being called a name that wasn’t/ isn’t associated to my male phase of life was feeling great. I’m not a man nor a woman I’m kinda both and none of them I’m just being me nowadays and that makes me happy, but I don’t communicate it as much as I’d wish since I’m living in a small village where the hills not only have eyes but also ears!
Anyways if you are in a situation like mine where you just don’t know what to do or what to be remember that there is no right way there is only your way and if it’s right or wrong for you will only show after a while. Live your life the best you can and love yourself!
My body dysmorphia or dysphoria mostly comes to my face structure and hair
I hate my voice too much
Dysphoria with my name or being reffered to as male is distressing. I hate confrontation so I hate correcting people.
Also having to dress up as a man is so uncomfortable but my mind makes me HAVE to do it
Most of my life I was fine with being a man so being non binary came out of no where of me
I just stumbled upon this video just randomly scrolling through and im definitely going to send this to my dad so he can stop calling me a woman and female!
i figuered out that i have Dysphoria because i wore the same Hoodie over the whole week. I tolt myself that i was doing that because i liked that hoodie but loved it because it can hide my chest the best. Now i have a binder and i can wear other things too.
😶😐
Great content! 💕🏳️⚧️
I'm agender, and I struggled as a kid and still struggle with my body and gendered spaces. Online, people gender me as male because of my voice and my typing style (?), and in real life, people gender me as female because of my body.
Bro I always felt like I was not super comfy at all with myself but I never understood why, because I knew being trans was a thing but I legit thought it was only male and female for the longest time. I know I'm not a girl, I know I'm not a boy, I'm non binary and that feels very liberating to say. So uhm, thank you for giving me validation haha
About the restrooms, it would be so cool ie I feel even f it was an obligation to build gender neutral restrooms them each time, because I never saw one of them in my country (France). Personnally it is not the thing that makes me feel the most dYsphoria but it is a problem. Maybe I feel even more dysphoria when it is implicitly gendered. Like, once, I was at a party and I only knew one people, and at a moment, the girls started to stay in a corner of the room and the boys in an other. It can feel stupid but I just felt I had to choose a side, it was horrible.
I know why I'm non binary, but I was interested in what you had to say anyway. I usually get feminine dysphoria, but then recently I've also started getting masculine dysphoria due to being perceived as male too frequently and wearing too much masculine clothing, so if feeling genderless weren't enough there's that as well now. So I have a skirt now :) probably not going to need it often, but gender pog
As a they/them, the second is probably my worst kind, to the point that its more than just discomfort, but just strait up emotional damage. I’m a minor (no age disclosure) and I have a catholic family, and was taught the way Mormons typically are, from what I've seen. My grandmother literally said that she’d send a trans relative to conversion therapy. Anywho, happy existence
I wish I were tall so I would look less femenine. I would like to be gender neutral. I stay thin so I do not show too much curves and wear big cloth.
Hi, it's my first time watching your video. First of all, I wanna ask about myself. If you're a girl/woman and I don't mind being called anything in (Pronouns) like She/Him, but I like men/guy. Am I straight? or Am I part of a transgender person? Also, I don't want to change my body just because someone says something that I don't like in my own opinion and I am really comfortable with my body for now. I think I'm having some doubts about myself. I just want some advice and thank you :)
- You don't have to change your body to be trans, the goal is for people to be comfortable with their body.
- Pronouns don't necessarily mean you're trans, you could just be a girl who uses any pronouns.
- Do you see yourself as a girl? Do you identify as a girl? Do you like that people see you as a girl? Do you pick female characters in games?
- "Straight" and "gay" weren't really conceptualized with nonbinary people in mind, but don't worry about it, you can call yourself that if you want, or not if you don't want to. It's up to you.
- If you consider yourself nonbinary you CAN call yourself trans, but you don't HAVE to if you don't want to. Nonbinary falls under the trans umbrella, but it's up to you what you call yourself.
Hope any of this helps!
@@HotDogTimeMachine385 Thx it helped :) Also, I like to be male or female in games and either of them is fine, but does it mean anything?.
All these signs resonate with me. I'm still trying to figure out what I am tho. I've been performing the cis guy thing for awhile, but it's not working for me. I feel like I am either enby, agender or just in denial about being a trans girl
funnily enough, i have no gender dysphoria or _euphoria_ anymore, but since 2020 to last year, _man_ was the dysphoria (and euphoria when i semi 'passed') real. it was only when i came out to my sister as probably trans and she told me i don't have to adhere to gender in any particular way, that i can be me, in my body, without caring about labels, that i stopped feeling it. (also, people drawing a certain character as a very masculine trans man who flaunts his non-op boobs)
it's strange. i still don't like 'she', or 'he' (bc when people say it online, it comes from a place of 'everyone online is automatically male so you are immediately a 'he''. augh. i have that "logic") in english, but i don't mind 'ella' in spanish, and thinking about someone calling me 'él' makes me excited, but in general, i no longer... _care?_
_Maybe_ I'm genderfluid? but i mostly don't care? i'm happy with my body now, finally. and yes, maybe 'it' pronouns make me perk up more than they should do, but i finally feel free to dress and act however i want.
i used to be bogged down to _only_ dress masculine. to HIDE every part of me that could be considered femInine, to lower my voice, to use sport bras- and i completely set aside the feminine aspects of myself i _did_ like. my clothes, for one. i never wore dresses besides those you wear after the beach, but i could no longer even wear those.
now... i don't care. i dress masc, i dress fem, mostly i dress with a mix of both, but it's not out of the need to be read one way or the other. i just am. and that's something that's not the case for most people. most people, including (should i say _particularly_ ) cis people care about that so so much. but i've grown to a level of gender apathy that i no longer care how others see me. i may dislike certain terms, but... idk. it's so strange. after going through 2 and a half maybe? or is it only 2? years of dysphoria and euphoria, not caring at all anymore is _strange,_ to say the least
I don't know if this is available in your area, but I was able to get nonbinary top surgery covered by state insurance. Could be worth investigating! (I'm not on T)
I relate to all of this so cool to find another nonbinary exmormon!
I'm not even gonna comment, just keep scrolling down and you'll see.
What does it mean to be trans, but not have gender dysphoria? What would that be like?
I generally feel uncertain about myself and feel like kinda disconnected from my body like its off and I don't like my chest, legs, and voice.
But its not to a great noticeable degree. Its like I can live with it, but don't like it either. So I'm confused.
I keep feeling like it doesn't make sense for me to be trans and that its really unlikely to be trans without having gender dysphoria.
I have my first appointment where I might get my prescription for T. I'm 24 now and want to figure it out.
So I'm just gonna try taking T and see how I feel as changes begin, pay attention, and check with myself if I really want this or its actually something else.
You don't have to have gender dysphoria to be trans, that's just a talking point that's used to gatekeep being trans. But aside from that, what you're describing IS gender dysphoria. The classic narrative about dysphoria being a disconnect between your body and your real gender doesn't happen unless you're already in the process of transitioning. I felt the same way before I realized I was transfem but as soon as I started hrt I realized that I actually hated my body and my assigned gender and didn't want to live without it. What made it hard to realize I was trans was that I didn't realize that you're supposed to LIKE your gender, not just tolerate it. I think after you start T you'll realize that you love the changes and not want to go back. The part about being disconnected from your body is called depersonalization and i didn't realize how awful it was until I got to stare at myself in the mirror and see that I was becoming more like my real gender instead of feeling like I was slowly dying.
I ve only watched 2 videos. Normally until 20yo ppl question things, some feel unconfortable w their body changes (plus the unfortunate social conditioning) & this isn t some dysphoria. Or if i don t feel sexual attraction to an unknown person w whom i m not connected with..if nowdays society values & promotes sex & i m not like that this doesn t mean i m asexual. I think so.. That it s easier to live as a man this doesn t mean i ll turn at one.. If you add the relegious thing in your family (that i suppose it wasn t this thing but the relationship w the parents). Sounds like many ppl think that they have some issue & define it comparing w society. Society is sick. Statistics show a big number of women who engage in one night stands & don t like it, even feel bad. This whole story about genders d be a positive thing bcs we must question things. But i don t think it s happening in a good way or that isn t allowed to happen bcs some ppl gain of this situation. Imo women who entered at workplaces wasn t a real thing bcs it wasn t consequence of respect/sympathy. & as such it couldn t be good. I d be very suspect if i were you
7:33 YES, unfortunately my native language is heavily gendered.
It‘s hard to speak about people without using feminine or masculine words…
Thank you so much, I am trying to be a better ally to the non-binary community. I get to spend a lot of time with the MTF trans and genderfluid communities but far less so with non-binary people so videos like this are really good for understanding both the similarities and the differences in lived experiences and understanding how and why my behaviours may need adapting at times.
It's called Growing pains . Gender refers to language and nothing else .
One of the things for me is my name. I think it sounds pretty but too feminine.
I identify as nonbinary but don't really experience body dysphoria but gender roles and expressions being forced on me really pisses me off. The social gender dysphoria aspect hits me the hardest.
I suspect I may be non-binary in part because I *don't* really care what pronouns people use to refer to me. Probably not dysphoric though.
People often focus on dysphoria, but there's also euphoria, the happy comforting feeling you get when someone genders you the way you want.
Would you prefer if people called you by they/them pronouns?
@@HotDogTimeMachine385 I have come across that term from watching many of Ash Hardell's vids (they wrote the "ABC's of LGBT" under their old name).
I hate how people treated them for putting out such wholesome content.
I discovered I had dysphoria when I already know I was non-binary...
te amo❤
I’m not sure if I’m non binary or genderfluid?! Or if I’m just cis
it's okay to try those labels out if u want :3
💛🤍💜🖤
It makes me uncomfortable that you're promoting regressive, sexist stereotypes so please be kind and stop expecting people to uphold them just because they make you feel better. Your views of women and men are still archaic.
Oh wow, The Offensive T-slur accused you of bigotry? I heard they're a bad person.
Yeah I've recorded a reaction video to it twice but each time thought against it cause I don't need that kind of negativity on my channel
@@lynnsaga1397 Understandable. People like that want attention.
You don't need a needless fight. Take careeee!! ^^
how can be one split and beeing not split? you are cheating
cat!
Having distress going through puberty and the changes your body goes through, for both boys and girls, is completely normal. It's especially tough for girls who have to endure the male gaze.
I’m transmasc and non binary / agender. I’ve been struggling with gender for the past 4 years ( iding as nb on and off ).
The thing that helped me settle down with my transness was understanding that there’s no body dysmorphia involved. I know I’m really pretty and quite attractive but THAT’S NOT WHO I AM. I hate it so much being complimented on most “feminine” features even from closest people who do it very politely and in good faith.
I want to have a masculine body and a feminine gender expression, but i’m stuck vica versa (((( I constantlyhave to fight between wearing what i love and what won’t make me dysphoric it sucks here
All men have a feminine side, as well as a masculine side.
ok. that’s different than being nonbinary tho
@@babs_babs Yes, because nonbinary people have a male side as well as a feminine side.
@@stevencarr4002male or female, that's it.
There is no internal feeling that is exclusive to men or women (or boys/girls), what makes anyone a man or a woman is being either male or female and reaching adulthood. Their sex and stage of physical maturity makes them men or women, not some "feeling" they have.
Believing there is some "essence" specific to males or female as far as feelings go, that can manifest "in the wrong body", is akin to a religious belief, having faith in something that is impossible to prove or disprove. In other words it is unfalsifiable, a concept which cannot be supported by scientific data, yet “trans” activists keep lying about “science backing them up”.
No one on the "trans" side can actually even explain what this "essence" is, they can't even explain it to themselves yet have convinced themselves that the feeling they have means they "are in the wrong body" - ignorant to the fact that their discomfort simply stems from not realising that they view conforming to sexist stereotypes as legitimate measures of manhood or womanhood. That is why every explanation given of WHY a male "can't be a man, but is instead woman" etc. relies upon listing stereotypical stuff, or, in some cases is completely abstract and refuses to actually provide any explanation of what they mean, simply stating they "know" that what they feel means what they say it does, even though they can't actually provide a definition of what it is they are supposedly feeling in any way. "It's hard to explain but I know I'm right" is an attitude one constantly comes up against - a religious faith in something they can't define.
This idea that the terms "man" and "woman" carry all this baggage, these associated sexist stereotypes, that people need to live up to or feel comfortable within order to be “cis” is a complete fabrication coming from the "trans" side. They want a term to reflect aspects of their personality but refuse to come up with a unique term for it, instead going on a narcissistic crusade to try force society to comply with their emotional needs. The needs of the emotionally immature, for that is universally the case; an inability to accept material reality and the fact that we cannot shape our surroundings to our will or force others to participate in our fantasies.
For the sole reason of it making “trans” people feel “happy” when they get to manipulate others , you want to create more boxes to put people in, as you won't accept simply just being a man or a woman based on being born male or female (and reaching adulthood, obviously people are boys and girls before becoming men or women), but believe you need this "freedom of expression" to broadcast what sexist stereotypes you feel more comfortable with - thinking the world needs to adopt the sexist view you lot have (you fail to see just how much you have in common with Conservatives).
Replacing objective definitions which are based in physical reality, with entirely subjective metaphysical claims, is not logical in any way, is not morally superior, and is demonstrably harmful, not least to female rights and protections, but also to practically anyone that buys into it as it warps people's perception of the underlying issues. It hinders people in their quest for individuation, creating this false narrative of them becoming more "authentic" when the total opposite is true, they believe they need validation from others in order to be happy etc. instead of being encouraged to find more inner strength and resilience with less reliance on how people see them. Demanding to be legally recognised as the opposite sex of what one is, is in no way shape or form more authentic than accepting the physical reality one is born into.
To believe we as individuals can have 100% control over our identity in society, what we are seen as by others, in interaction with, and in relation to, society/the world/physical existence is a fool's errand, it is a delusional understanding of reality and existence.
This "woman is a social construct" thing IS the part that validates and perpetuates sexist stereotypes - woman isn't a social construct in that sense, it is a word society has chosen yes, but to describe a PHYSICAL state of being, not anyone's emotional states or where they fall on some spectrum of masculinity or femininity. There is a fundamental misunderstanding here of what the definition of man and woman means. The notion that people need to live up to sexist stereotypes of what "real men" or "real women" are, is complete fantasy. The fact that many people act as if sexist stereotypes were valid ways of measuring "real men" or real women" is a problem with the individual and their sexist bias, not with the terms themselves, as the terms themselves have none of the expectational baggage that people who internalise sexist stereotypes associate with them.
Read the thumbnail as “Gender Sucks”
Which is valid as a non-binary person myself
No...
Life is full of uncomfortable feelings and situations, you just need to deal with it and move on. Having top surgery and taking hormones won't make these things any less.
whats this woman yapping about damn west gone crazy with all this prosperity they are having lately
what prosperity? the middle class is doing worse and worse every year
"There is a hate video about me" - see, that's the thing - most of you act as if you are important that much to be hated which is lowkey egotistical. You are not, and just because you caught someone's attention enough to be criticized, it doesn't mean you are hated. And I just watched that video to see was there really any "hate" - and, of course, there wasn't. Just the opposite, it was very friendly and seemingly understanding to most of the things you describe as your experience, except your interpretations of it. So, if you are under such false impression about that, makes me wonder how many other things you just perceive different from what they really are. Like, in one video you said something about feeling bad when mistaken for both, woman and man. I simply cannot believe you were ever mistaken for a man, given the fact that people correctly gues someone's sex in 99% of cases, and you certainly doon't look like that 1% exception. Then in 3rd video, you - a supposed asexual person drooling over lesbians, like wtf? So, food for thought - maybe not taken seriously isn't the world's problem, but you problem.
I feel genuinely sad and worried for you and many of the girls in the comments. Your life story explains so much why you are rejecting your biological female nature. You have been deeply damaged by your toxic environment, and cannot imagine how you could be a free person, free of social and cultural gender role pressures, even in your natural, biologically female body. It is a shame, as none of it really needed to happen This has nothing to do with transexualism however. It is a form of trauma response, and the desire for self-mutilation is a form of trauma -induced coping mechanism. Things are getting very messy and I sincerely hope you can receive all the help you need and I wish you all the best in your quest for happiness and self- actualisation.
you just have anxiety not gender problem
It’s considered hate speech if you present facts.
Well I guess we're gonna have to get "hateful" lol!
why do we need to stereotype gender so much that if you're a boy that likes barbies it means you are non binary or a girl.
or if you are a sporty girl and are comfortable with body hair that means you're non binary or a boy.
men and women don't have to fit into any stereotype to be the sex they are.
thats because of certain people that want people to think like this, and its working... after looking at the comments its actually working too well, video posted 2 weeks ago already has 141 comments of which most are positive. they dont understand you can actually be a gal that likes soccer or something, in their eyes it instantly makes you a guy. why so? because these people didnt get enough attention as a child and by giving themselves dumb titles that make no sense whatsoever they get the attention. these are all just products of bad parenting, simple as.
@@JonathanJimbo you cant disagree with my first statement since its a fact, if only you knew this whole gender carousel is only in play because certain people are making alot of money and power off of useful idiots. i dont expect you to believe me right now but sooner or later everyone will know. espescially the people who fell for the whole more than 2 genders, will probably all, well yknow join the 41% because what would you do if you find out your entire life has been based on the perverted cause of some multibillionaire. i understand your point about walking into a church but the people who iam talking about actually hate religion because it unifies people instead of seperating them, which is also a part in this gender paranoia, seperation. i hope youre talking about this from an outsider point of view because if its not too late, i urge you to do research on both sides, who knows you might end up agreeing with me.
fair enough, have you made -up identity - but dont include woman or man as an identity
this whole gee generation is nonsense
Hey a women
Yeah, I feel all of that. 💛🤍💜🖤
The Book Of The Dead shouldn't be in the scriptures; nor should Multiple Temple Sealing. I'm more of a XtF in the Non-Binary, and I'm a Demigirl. The way I act in Reddit has given me answers, and not all of us look a like; being you and not some made up fantasy in your head; so go make a splash hit... I know I am, and I'm never going to give up... Dang, I need to update my profile picture 😆.🏳⚧