‼️ I AM NOT POSTING THIS TO TRASH HIM‼️ I am posting this … like I always have to help other people. I’ve learned a lot along the way and I hope my experience helps someone. So please don’t tell me to move on. I’m told that about prison too and it’s frustrating. I don’t post videos for myself 🤪 Also .. This isn’t the scariest thing to be completely honest but I didn’t know what else to title it. This scared me SO BADLY but being held hostage was definitely worse. Love y’all! ❤️🩹🦝
@MasonsMemoirs it's not funny & there is research that shows a lot of ppl have ptsd from prison. Even people who have done both say they have it worse from prison. If u don't like her content, scroll on.
I appreciate these videos... They've been very helpful for me and make me feel not so alone in this sort of relationship dynamic. Your growth and healing from this is very inspiring
@@MasonsMemoirs If you do your research you would know people have ptsd from many things...car accidents, sexual assault, domestic violence, muggings and shootings and plenty more. It's not just from war.
It’s SO important to talk about not staying together “for the kids”. I was a kid who grew up in an emotionally chaotic/unpredictable home. I had hyper vivid reoccurring nightmares every single night, until I found out that cannabis exists, when I was 17. I had to teach myself not to disassociate, just to be able to function as an adult who has to work and do chores etc, and I can still pretty much only do it consistently when I take meds (for diagnosed conditions, and only as directed). My parents did their absolute best, but they were operating off of very outdated standards and priorities. We can do better now
My family looked super normal from the outside and when I was a kid I was so happy they stayed together. I wish I’d been educated about emotional abuse instead of the horrors of divorce 😐
I try not to bring attention to it, but I really appreciate you pushing through all the bullying in the comments. No matter what people think of what you’re saying, it is so not necessary and SO WEIRD to repeatedly berate your decisions, call you a liar, or just straight up say mean things about you in the comments of your videos. I don’t understand how anyone finds the time to bully a stranger on the internet? I just wasted 5+ minutes of my day typing this out. Imagine all the things you guys could be doing with your time instead of harassing Jessica. Ya’ll need to do better. Or grow up because I really can’t imagine fully grown adults having the time to be this cruel.
My ex choked me out till I passed out and then called the cops and starting stabbing himself in the head with a high heel shoe & told the cops I did it. They called BS and helped me get to a safe place.. those officers helped me so much.
Drugs DEFINITELY change who you are!!! Speaking from experience have been clean for 14yrs. Glad you're living your best life now!!! You deserve it!!! 👊🏻
@@JessicaKent I agree if the person was always hiding who they Truly are!!Glad you're are Happy now and out of the crazy nightmare!!! Wishing you continued success and a LIFETIME of Happiness!!!! ❤️
@@Memwar It's more about the Actions you take!! Not the actual high!!! You lie to the closest people to ya Because of your addiction you are totally aggressive doing withdrawals and in General you do things you would never do as a Sober/True version of yourself!! Not to mention you don't deal with emotions correctly!!! Hope this helps clarify a little!!!
Seriously thank you for standing up and speaking out ! I was in an abusive relationship for many years, and it took everything I had to get myself and my children out of that nightmare. By you speaking out you're going to help so many young women find the courage and strength to leave.
Please don't use Jessica as an example of someone who has a good head on their shoulders. It's okay to stick up for yourself but this woman is a professional victim and she will not benefit you when it comes to a healthy thinking pattern
@@veronicamarrs if you feel this way why on earth are you here watching her content, commenting on her content? It's almost as if you don't have a life or something .
Uh, how is she a "professional victim"? She IS a victim. And she's doing what a lot of people are either too scared to do, or have been told to stay quiet... Jessica isn't perfect, cos no one is perfect. And lots of people will disagree with her talking about things like this. But in my opinion, by talking about it, it helps others to recognise similar patterns of behaviour, and gives them the tools to be able to see their own abusive relationships and situations for what they are. No one, including Jess herself, is saying to use her as an example, or even to necessarily like her, but she's giving vital details from an actual situation she went through, that is so hard to find, it's not like you can search on Google for details like this. So, you can have your opinion, but don't insult or victim blame or take away someone's hope, your comment here is unnecessary and unkind, especially as OP was explaining her own abusive situation that she had the courage to leave. You dismissed all of that just to hate on Jess which is gross. @@veronicamarrs
A so called "failed relationship" is a much better example for the kiddos than staying. Growing up constantly seeing abuse is modeling for them that it's okay to take that. Taking the courage, COURAGE (yelling for people in the back and drive home that leaving takes A LOT OF COURAGE) is huge. That in itself models to your kids that abuse isn't something you have to deal with, it's not okay, and you can /need to leave. And then, to get in a relationship with someone who truly shows his love for you models even more for them of what a relationship should be like. Jessica - if you see this, I know I'm a random stranger on the internet, but I want to tell you how proud I am of you for everything you've done and the life you've created for yourself!
Had an ex who broke my jaw, my nose, gave me black eyes, and bruises all over my body. This was about 3 years ago. It took me 7 tries to leave and I was able to break free. Finally got the courage to call the police and get a restraining order after we broke up. After all that I had to block him off all socials, moved, and changed my phone number. Sometimes I get flashback, and start shaking. I just need to remind myself, I am a survivor, and it’s in the past now. Healing has been a journey and a process. God bless anyone who is going thru this, or went thru this.
@@Ohnothetableits You, dear heart, are SUCH a brave, badass, & inspiring human being! 👏🥹 I am So proud of you & wish you nothing but a peacefully happy, & healed, rest of your existence ☮️💜🎆
So glad you got out!! You beat your addiction to him!!! I will be 21 months sober from alcohol (my only substance) very soon!! Have zero regrets about quitting!!
This reminds me of the relationship I was in when I was 17. Young and native and wanting a bad boy, I ended up traumatized and still seeking professional help today following multiple incidents of suicide attempts and domestic violence where I was choked, cut and strangled, forced to inject. No relationship is worth dealing with any of that, and it is so incredibly hard to leave those relationships!! So glad we are both out of it Jess!
Anyone who’s dealt with a narcissist (mine was for over 20 years) knows of them driving insanely fast on the highway to scare you into an anxiety ridden breakdown… not to mention the other 100 characteristics they share (ruining all holidays, birthdays, pitting children against you, etc etc🤮) Smfh. Narcissists are the closest thing to the devil, absolute truth.
Yes, my ex used to delight in making me think he was going to kill us both driving reckless and exremely fast. Who does that unless you're a psychopath?
@@tcshy1903 🤦🏻♀️ what a jerk! Mine would silently do it. I’d express my anxiety, fear or ask why he’s driving so angrily and then he’d gaslight me with the “your so sensitive”, “I’m not angry, you just love to argue”, “You need mental help”. Straight evil!
My father was abusive towards my mother. It took many years because she was not financially independent enough to afford somewhere to live on top of the bills. It took until property taxes that none of us could afford, to leave. Please know that your kids will see what you do for them more than not having a two parent household. My father was just…there. My mom raised me and I’m better for it. It took many years for him to wise up now that he’s in his 70s and alone. He tries to have some relationship with me, especially since my sister wants more than nothing to do with him. I will sometimes communicate with him, because of who I am as a person and my mom’s influence. Keep doing what you’re doing and your kids will be ok
Never thought there was someone that had a very very similar growing up ,now my father is 70 as well and alone, I was struggling today about a few things THANK YOU for sharing lets me know im not alone! ❤
@@aprilwood4322 we’re much more alike in our experiences than we think we are. That’s one good thing about social media and platforms that people can share their stories. People can connect and know they’re not alone in the world. I see you, too. An internet side hug/handshake/awkward wave to you. You’ll be ok, too 💜
Beautifully said. You can't change others, but we can control how we handle situations. Nobody wants a failed relationship, but as long as you protect yourself and your kids and see the signs, then you will know when it's time to get out. None of that was your fault. I see some of the things people say online about you and it's disgusting and appalling but I'm so happy for you and how far you've come. What doesn't kill us truly makes us stronger. S*** I went through two bad relationships but thank God came out the other side. I'll be damned if I ever deal with that shit again. No one knows the struggle unless they bewn in it and lord knows it's a cluster fuck that is impossible to explain.
It’s been almost 27 years with my narcissist. I empathize with your pain and fear of not knowing. I commend your bravery to leave, I hope to be that brave someday too.
Girl this one hit home for me I am in the exact same situation and completely scared and don't know what to do, we have a child together and that is my reason of hanging on your video is truly inspiring and I hope I can find the strength to do what you did Thank you girl
Wow, thank you Jessica. Sadly we share such similar stories and experiences. You articulated this so well that I think I might send it to some people in my life so maybe they’ll understand it. I can never articulate it right. I feel like saying I was in an abusive relationship is minimizing what it really was, doesn’t do it any justice, falls flat for me. It’s so hard to explain what it was really like living through narcissistic abuse with a severely mentally ill addict, the trauma bond, the horrible lasting literal brain damage. Not everyone has experienced that level of what I consider evil, yeah the drugs and alcohol exacerbate it immensely, but that’s still who they really are, they’re just unable to mask it. I’ve been watching your channel for YEARS and you’ve helped and taught me so much! So, thank you! I’m so happy you escaped and are milestones further on your healing journey and that you’re being treated the way you deserve, finally. It’s been 4 years since I left. It’s been the hardest work I’ve ever done, but I’ve slowly healed more and more and I’m soooo happy with where I’m at and who I am today. So, you’re getting closer to it being a distant memory that no longer impacts you or has any power over you. ❤️
Listening to this and your description of how they will do anything and everything to make every occasion, everyday about them and more often than not- Way to often than not an extremely traumatic event went along w/ it. It was like you were talking about my ex. I'm now w/ a great guy for over 7 years who continues to help put me back together, I too will forever be changed, but we do heal-its slow and daily. I'm so happy your out of that, healing, and happy!
Jess ❤❤ I admire, appreciate, and am grateful for your openness and vulnerability!! Anyone who can’t see and hear the genuineness when you speak on this topic is only seeing and hearing what they WANT. THANK YOU ❤❤
Because of you, I learned that my ex-boyfriend was a narcissist and I appreciate you for putting your experiences and everything you’ve went through. It’s taught me a lot and I had an experience like that. He brought up a billboard with the chick with the gorgeous body and I finally got the guts up to say something to him about it and blame it on me like it’s my faultthat she had a better body
Jess, you're doing amazing! So sorry for what you've been through! I was with 2 of them but didn't have any awareness about narcissists until after the second. Thank you for sharing your story, watching videos of other's experiences helped me a lot. Also, you're so beautiful and such a good Mom and such a strong person!! I am so happy for you with the life you have now, you deserve it ❤
My hard, was when my kids said to me, can’t we just leave. I had already been preparing, by purchasing things for our own house. I filed a PFA, I took more than half of our Bank account, I purchased a home, hired a mover, and moved on.
My heart breaks for you while also being happy that you are out of the mess and jn a better place. I’ve been in physically & mentally abusive relationships. Yes. That’s plural. I know how to pick ‘em. 🤦♀️ Leaving is so scary and hard. I’m so proud of you for doing it! Sending love!
the way you speak about your children.. center them in the conversation, use them as a driving force for change and to face fears...sacred and so refreshing.
You don’t have to prove anything to anyone. You know what happened. You’re not trying to ruin him you’re trying to heal. And remember, the best parts of life happen off the internet and are often not shared with the internet. 🖤🖤🖤
There's a band down under names after a much feared union( teamsters) called the Painter's and dockers they have a song named if he beats you leave. It's pretty much the story of a friend of the girls perspective anyway it rings true here. If there's one thing addiction and the reset you need us to own your shit. Not only have you done this and more by talking about these issues you ARE helping others and we all see how much you have grown and found your truth in a clear voice in a clear head Well done you Jessica. Keep kicking goals and taking names as it definitely worth it. Your now enjoy the fruits of a difficult past. You so deserve it. Stay strong.
Kids aware of everything. They choose to ignore when they’re not sure how to respond to certain situations. I remember a lot of what ppl said around me, when they thought I do my own thing or can’t hear them when I was 4 yo.
I love your videos bcuz youre real! None of us are perfect! I have ptsd from abusive relationships too. Im glad you got away from him. Youre such an inspiration to so many ppl!
My narc said the same thing to me. I was really depressed, suicidal ideation, and he said You wouldn’t follow through with that, you can’t follow through with anything. And thats not even the worst thing hes said to me. Being in a toxic narcissistic is the most soul sucking, miserable experience. Yet I still crave his attention and “love”.
Thank you for sharing Jess!! I remember watching his stories of his ptsd from the war, I really hope he gets support and help, because I don’t think he’s a bad person I just don’t think he had the skill set, it doesn’t take anything away from the pain that he caused you, and I’m happy that you have so much insight from this, and won’t put up with it again, ever.
@@alexcooper6953 I do agree!!! And that’s why I did state that I really hope he gets support and counselling and I don’t mean that in an offensive way. He did go through things many of us won’t ever understand and that isn’t Jess’ fault by any means but the veterans don’t have the support they need when they come home.
You've been through it and then some. You already know you're helping people. Just knowing there is hope can be enough to save a life or prevent a hospitalization. Thank you, not for me, but for those you help. My issues were much less severe, but, well, three diagnoses aren't nothing. I have someone in my life who pulled me from the brink. Sorry for rambling, but you are that person for so many.
My husband does this... He will hit, punch, and bite himself when I try to dicuss any issue we need to solve. No matter how gentle, understanding, and lovingly I frame things, he would immediately shut down the conversation, accuse me of starting sh*t, and then get violent on himself. He'd leave bruises, black eyes, lumps, bite marks, and even needed 8 Staples in his head from smashing it on the corner of a wall. I can't conflict resolve w him at all bc he will resort to any means to avoid problem solving, accountability, and changing behaviors. It's very traumatizing to me, yet he demands hugs afterwards, totally dismissing my feelings for his comfort. We've been separated for 3 years (married for 6, so half that), and I having a really hard time getting to the point of filing. I REALLY appreciate these videos... They've been very helpful for me and make me feel not so alone in this sort of relationship dynamic. Your growth and healing from this is very inspiring. Thank u for talking abt this difficult topic 🤗 Love u, Jess!
Thank you for this post..I'm sure it has helped someone, it takes alot to admit there were mistakes and whoever has the negative comments about 'just get over him' , unfortunately when someone damages your psyche you don't just get over it, you must work though it! 💕💕 Your content!!
A little tip about leaving an abusive relationship, especially if there's a trauma bond, try to get some friends with you, to help you carry your stuff out of that place and stay with you after. When I finally got the strength to leave my abusive ex, two of my besties brought their car, parked down from his apartment, and came up in the stairwell to make sure he wouldn't hurt me or say anything to make me stay, I passed my stuff down to them and they loaded the car and we left. It felt euphoric, I was finally free, we blasted music and laughed all the way to my dad's house. We partied that night, had a fun lil' sleepover and I thanked them for everything. I'm so grateful they were there, because they helped me really feel how much I was better without him, and knowing they were there in case anything happened let me know I was finally safe. So if you can, get a good support system, and tell your friends that you need to leave so you can make a plan together, having support in this is so helpful! And you deserve it! Your friends will be happy to get you out of that hell, trust me.
I was in an abusive relationship for ten years with the father of my youngest two children and I will say leaving is SO hard. But she's right when she says staying was hard too. He treated me horribly in front of all my children and my oldest one remembers all of it. I've finally found someone who gives me the world in every possible way and we are getting married next year. I'm clean now after leaving my ex ( which never would have happened if I had stayed) and now my kids can see a happy healthy relationship. And as an added bonus I have my fiance's kids in our lives too. Life is great. 5 kids and a wonderful man. It's about time something went right. :) I'm glad you finally get that too. Everyone deserves to be treated right! Don't let anyone ever make you believe you don't deserve to be happy!
I went thru something like this. It took me 7 times before I got out and left. I'm so proud of you and happy to see you and your kids happy and healthy. I've followed you since you had under 7k followers, you have grown in an amazing way 🖤
one time my husband, we have been separated almost 2 years now, had been up for several days on ice. he would always accuse me of cheating & he was so gone he really thought i had a guy upstairs! but he was too scared to go check so he just kept fuckin with me & it eventually got a little physical & he ended up holding me up on the wall & while he was screaming in my face he leaned in & bit my face & took a chunk of skin out of my face! when he looked down at me & seen the blood he almost came back to himself for a min & was crying & apologizing. my daughter was around for a lot of things & she would try so hard to keep him calm and let him know i wasn’t doing anything and nobody else was either. we were trying to get him to just lay down with us and calm down & he got on the phone & calked 911 then hung up. then he did it again. & he literally called 911 on himself 8 times & kept hanging up then when the cops ended up coming to our door he started yelling at me bc i was the one who called the cops according to him. thank god he is now sober & he runs a sober living house now. we aren’t back together & idk if we ever will be but we are able to co parent now and be friends and i am so thankful.
I was with an emotionally abusive covert narcissist for 8 fucking years before I finally found the strength to leave, for the last like year of our relationship I basically just shut down, in retrospect I think I was saving up my energy to leave. Best decision I ever made. I got with him 7 DAYS after getting clean. Wtf was I thinking lol. But I'm seeing a great guy now and I'm working on not having that fight or flight response and things have been going really well. I don't wake up feeling like a different person every day, I feel safe and secure, I don't feel trapped... Your advice is exactly right. If you are not happy, FUCKING LEAVE
I grew up in a toxic , violent house and swore I would never live in a situation like that as a grown-up. Yes , it was traumatic living like that. Common sense told me to avoid people that would treat me like that. I try to understand why anyone would go back to a terrible relationship like that, but I don't know why anyone would do that. I had enough abuse as a child. BTW, congratulations on getting out of your situation. I also don't understand why people be the ones to move on instead of telling you to move on .
You are so amazing! I have been following you for years. You are a strong person. You are an amazing example to your kids and anyone who watches your videos. Your strength through the abuse and dv is inspiring. You rock! Love ya!
Not sure if I watched ur videos when you first started but I did start a few years ago pre surgery and before you got your teeth done and you were always gorgeous but I’m glad to see you get the success you have and were able to do the things you wanted to do in order to feel good. The last videos I watched were when your ex just relapsed and I am so proud of you for leaving him and moving on. My ex is a narcissist so I just wanted to reach out and say I’m sorry you had to deal with him because being in a relationship with someone who thinks they do no wrong is so fucking hard but the fact they gaslight everyone into thinking they are the problem (as in everyone else, Not them) and it’s just a terror. I’ve never heard “narcissistic abuse” but I feel that to another level. My ex used and abused me and abused his power over me and I am Suffering the consequences. Wishing you and your daughters the best!
“Healing is your responsibility” is something I really understand differently after starting it- and seeing my parent refuse to. I’m not interested in any narrative that it’s her age or her generation, or her cluster b’s. Older generations have been kinder. People in her generation have been kinder (including literally my dad.) I have the borderline I inherited from her. Healing is my responsibility. I don’t want to ever go back to the way I was.
Despite all the hurt you have been through, how do you let go of the person you love so much even when you KNOW you deserve better? How did you have the strength to keep moving forward? & Not want to go back even to seek comfort or understand the “why”? I’m struggling with this SO much… I’ve never felt so alone or hurt. The ending of this video hit hard… When your body and brain want different things… When you’re heartbroken and hurt… When the person is someone you hate for hurting you but you love them so fucking much. (Please keep in mind, I don’t have family or a support circle in my corner… so feeling “alone” while actually being alone is HARD).
I absolutely believe you, when my narcissistic ex started using meth, his true self came out. He changed so quickly and so much. Even down to the soda he drank. He tried to gaslight me about even something that small. Drugs amplify the dark parts of everyone but when a narcissist gets on heavy mind altering drugs, they cannot hold up their mask anymore.
I think there are people out there who expect the "victim" to be perfect. If there are no perfect people, there are no perfect "victims". We are all just fallible humans fumbling through life. I don't think anyone gets through unscathed, some are just luckier not to deal with absolute horror and madness. Wishing hope to anyone in need of it right now. Stay strong and believe in you.
I’m so happy to hear your getting the love you deserve. I have NEVER seen my mother in a healthy relationship. I’m 35 now and she is about to turn 60 and she is with a complete loser who uses her. The domestic violence I saw growing up was something from a movie. My mother was dragged once by my father in a car that her knees and hands had the worst road rash I have ever seen. She literally could not walk. I don’t recall the actually car dragging but what I mean is I saw the aftermath of my mother, going insane searching for my dad bc I believe he was cheating on her because I remember her bringing us to his parents house or something and she was trying to kick the door down. I was like 7 or younger. Anyways I have never seen a man love her and to now he around her and see that she is gonna die without ever having experienced being treated good or just to be independent and happy is so fucking heartbreaking. I’m going through the hardest time of my life after the worst year of my life and I will die alone before I am ever dealing with a narcissistic abuser and unfortunate my dream guy is also one and I’m not even gonna think about his dumb ass bc I’m embarrassed for myself for even giving him the time of day, early fucking mornings, late nights and random evenings. Fuck that.
My heart goes out to you, Jess. You’ve gone through so much and in the public eye, no less. You’re a badass for leaving, speaking out, and taking care of yourself and your girls. My father was an abusive narcissist and I’m so blessed my mom left him when she did. I was a baby, but like others have said, it’s better to have come from a broken home than to actively live in one.
I didn’t realize that a relationship I was in while in my early twenties was toxic. He did all the things your ex did, and blamed me. Never spent time with me, but I was expected to be ready to spend time with him. Abused me in all ways possible. Told me all the things I needed and wanted to hear. He broke up with me, then started to stalk me. He was furious I was going out, having a life so he tried to ruin it. Then he tried to sweet talk me back, mostly because he was broke and couch surfing. I refused and he actually left me alone afterwards. But I changed my phone number and moved, so eventually he probably did come by my old apartment. It’s been over 24 years, and I still have issues. I’m married to a great guy, and he knows everything my ex put me through. You deserve the best, Jess! For you and your girls.❤
This video made me realize that my ex of 16 years was a total narcissistic and so many things make much more sense now as I'm thinking back on shit from the past that he's done...always flipping it on me n never taking accountability...oh I could go on n on but would need 4 years to explain it all (yes it's thats much shit!) Thank you for sharing!
“You get to pick your hard” I can’t tell you how much I needed to hear this right now. It’s not about a relationship, but it still couldn’t be more true for my current situation. So thanks. You did help at least 1 person- me. ❤ (Actually you helped at least 3, because I have 2 kids also. And helping me helps them. Thanks for being so vulnerable, so publicly.)
I've never been a drug addict but I got a story to tell you. My dad died in April. My stepmother treated me like shit. My mom invited me to visit her I said yes my stepmother said that I was not responsible I had to choose between her and my mom I choose my mom I've happy since I moved to Vegas
I appreciate even though these videos may not be treated well by the algorithm, you still talk about these topics because they’re important to you. I’ve been watching some people I know getting with really awful toxic people and not being able to see or talk about how hurtful it is to be with someone like that.
Omg wow so traumatizing. May I ask how are u now? Have u been able to heal from this absolutely aweful situation? Oh I hope so. I’m so glad u know him hanging himself was not about u but about him
@@phoebetonkin8020 yep. His ex told me after she left him he stalked her for years and even in the beginning of our relationship, I had caught him placing a call to her, so I'm sure he would've done the same to me but maybe worse
@@cleosworld9096 I'm okay! Thank you for asking. This all happened at the end of June last year. Luckily I disconnected from the relationship a couple years before it actually ended, and I think that really helped with getting over it. I still have moments of like "wow I don't even really believe that actually happened" so I think I'm somewhat still in shock or maybe denial idk. It was really hard at first
@@manders. oh my gosh that’s actually pretty recent. There’s no right way to feel or right way to move on from trauma. It’s going to take a long time to accept it and fully move on. And that’s ok. You’ve realized it was all him not u so that’s the hardest part. We naturally wanna blame ourselves and u aren’t. One day you’ll wake up and realize wow I been good for so long. U haven’t thought about it or cried or had a dream or any trauma response in a long time. But that might take a very long time and that’s ok. U will find the perfect partner one day and he’ll just be a distant memory
JESS! I haven't been seeing your videos and I thought maybe you had taken another break. Then I decided to go to your channel to check and there are a bunch of new videos! It showed me as not subscribed which I know is bullshit because I would NEVER have done that! God YT sucks sometimes 😤 Anyways I resubed and can't wait to binge your new videos! Love you and congrats on your awesome engagement! 🫶
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS! Seriously, I cannot thank you enough. You may never realize how many women and children you may have just saved with this video. Or how many victims you made something really finally, “CLICK”, and have the strength to NOT go back. I’m so glad to see your pride in doing this for your yourself and your kids and teaching your kids not to stand for that and that that NEVER has to be their norm! You’re an excellent mother. And this is something I’ve thought several times before, but I’d love some parenting content from you. If you’re comfortable of course, but I’ve head so many things you’ve said about parenting or your parenting style or theories and it was so helpful. I’d love more info about how you discuss substance abuse in their parents with them (whether the parent is in active addition or recovery) and specifics on examples of what’s age appropriate. Also, how you told your kids that yall had to leave daddy’s house and the differences about that topic now that you’ve been out a little bit. thanks again, Jess.
Jessica keep on Lady. What you are doing needs to be done so bad! Your purpose is so much bigger than you know. Speaking out and speaking up helps you but it also helps so many others that need to hear it! Your reward for what you went through is this beautiful new life you have! You deserve it!❤️🩹❤️
it’s been a decade since i’ve gone through this and your videos help me so much! a decade later im realizing i still have triggers i didn’t even know about. it’s amazing what the body stores! i love hearing you share it helps me process even so long later. thanks for another great video ❤
i am sorry with what you went threw with your ex i am appreciate you sharing your story with ur fans on your youtube channel. part of your story touched me and thats what kept engaged in your channel. have a good evening jess and see u on ur next video take care.
I’ve never been around anyone who has had a drug addiction but I’ve always been intrigued by it which led me to find your channel years ago and I just want to say that you are so strong. There is so much drama around you but to the ride or dies it’s all just noise. I have never felt that you have been insincere when telling your story and it’s one of the reasons I still love watching you so much! Keep it up Jess and congratulations on your engagement!
‼️ I AM NOT POSTING THIS TO TRASH HIM‼️ I am posting this … like I always have to help other people. I’ve learned a lot along the way and I hope my experience helps someone. So please don’t tell me to move on. I’m told that about prison too and it’s frustrating. I don’t post videos for myself 🤪 Also .. This isn’t the scariest thing to be completely honest but I didn’t know what else to title it. This scared me SO BADLY but being held hostage was definitely worse. Love y’all! ❤️🩹🦝
@@JessicaKent PTSD from going to jail is funny. get it from going to war and fighting for your country
@MasonsMemoirs it's not funny & there is research that shows a lot of ppl have ptsd from prison. Even people who have done both say they have it worse from prison. If u don't like her content, scroll on.
I appreciate these videos... They've been very helpful for me and make me feel not so alone in this sort of relationship dynamic. Your growth and healing from this is very inspiring
@@MasonsMemoirs If you do your research you would know people have ptsd from many things...car accidents, sexual assault, domestic violence, muggings and shootings and plenty more. It's not just from war.
@@MasonsMemoirs Going to prison is 100% the kind of event that would cause PTSD. You don't seem to know anything about what you're talking about.
It’s SO important to talk about not staying together “for the kids”. I was a kid who grew up in an emotionally chaotic/unpredictable home. I had hyper vivid reoccurring nightmares every single night, until I found out that cannabis exists, when I was 17. I had to teach myself not to disassociate, just to be able to function as an adult who has to work and do chores etc, and I can still pretty much only do it consistently when I take meds (for diagnosed conditions, and only as directed).
My parents did their absolute best, but they were operating off of very outdated standards and priorities. We can do better now
She gets it ^ 👏
My family looked super normal from the outside and when I was a kid I was so happy they stayed together. I wish I’d been educated about emotional abuse instead of the horrors of divorce 😐
I try not to bring attention to it, but I really appreciate you pushing through all the bullying in the comments. No matter what people think of what you’re saying, it is so not necessary and SO WEIRD to repeatedly berate your decisions, call you a liar, or just straight up say mean things about you in the comments of your videos. I don’t understand how anyone finds the time to bully a stranger on the internet? I just wasted 5+ minutes of my day typing this out. Imagine all the things you guys could be doing with your time instead of harassing Jessica. Ya’ll need to do better. Or grow up because I really can’t imagine fully grown adults having the time to be this cruel.
Perfectly said!!!!!
My ex choked me out till I passed out and then called the cops and starting stabbing himself in the head with a high heel shoe & told the cops I did it. They called BS and helped me get to a safe place.. those officers helped me so much.
OMG 😮
Drugs DEFINITELY change who you are!!! Speaking from experience have been clean for 14yrs. Glad you're living your best life now!!! You deserve it!!! 👊🏻
To some degree yes they do but I believe for some people it just exposes how horrible they really are. Just like money.
@@JessicaKent I agree if the person was always hiding who they Truly are!!Glad you're are Happy now and out of the crazy nightmare!!! Wishing you continued success and a LIFETIME of Happiness!!!! ❤️
Why do they change who we are? You feel like yourself at the time.
@@Memwar It's more about the Actions you take!! Not the actual high!!! You lie to the closest people to ya Because of your addiction you are totally aggressive doing withdrawals and in General you do things you would never do as a Sober/True version of yourself!! Not to mention you don't deal with emotions correctly!!! Hope this helps clarify a little!!!
"I just wanna be loved... call me frickin' crazy." TRUTH!
Seriously thank you for standing up and speaking out ! I was in an abusive relationship for many years, and it took everything I had to get myself and my children out of that nightmare. By you speaking out you're going to help so many young women find the courage and strength to leave.
Please don't use Jessica as an example of someone who has a good head on their shoulders. It's okay to stick up for yourself but this woman is a professional victim and she will not benefit you when it comes to a healthy thinking pattern
Bless you for your comment & I’m proud of you for leaving!!! ❤
@@veronicamarrs if you feel this way why on earth are you here watching her content, commenting on her content? It's almost as if you don't have a life or something .
Uh, how is she a "professional victim"? She IS a victim. And she's doing what a lot of people are either too scared to do, or have been told to stay quiet... Jessica isn't perfect, cos no one is perfect. And lots of people will disagree with her talking about things like this. But in my opinion, by talking about it, it helps others to recognise similar patterns of behaviour, and gives them the tools to be able to see their own abusive relationships and situations for what they are. No one, including Jess herself, is saying to use her as an example, or even to necessarily like her, but she's giving vital details from an actual situation she went through, that is so hard to find, it's not like you can search on Google for details like this. So, you can have your opinion, but don't insult or victim blame or take away someone's hope, your comment here is unnecessary and unkind, especially as OP was explaining her own abusive situation that she had the courage to leave. You dismissed all of that just to hate on Jess which is gross. @@veronicamarrs
@@timeenchantre1you can still have a life and spend a few seconds of your time to speak your opinion.
You’re a human, never forget that. Give yourself grace. I’m proud of how far you’ve come and how far I know you’ll go.
A so called "failed relationship" is a much better example for the kiddos than staying. Growing up constantly seeing abuse is modeling for them that it's okay to take that. Taking the courage, COURAGE (yelling for people in the back and drive home that leaving takes A LOT OF COURAGE) is huge. That in itself models to your kids that abuse isn't something you have to deal with, it's not okay, and you can /need to leave. And then, to get in a relationship with someone who truly shows his love for you models even more for them of what a relationship should be like.
Jessica - if you see this, I know I'm a random stranger on the internet, but I want to tell you how proud I am of you for everything you've done and the life you've created for yourself!
Jess, I know you didn't have to tell all of this and I'm so glad your are back and doing good. Your life is precious...don't you forget it!!!❤❤❤
Had an ex who broke my jaw, my nose, gave me black eyes, and bruises all over my body. This was about 3 years ago. It took me 7 tries to leave and I was able to break free. Finally got the courage to call the police and get a restraining order after we broke up. After all that I had to block him off all socials, moved, and changed my phone number. Sometimes I get flashback, and start shaking. I just need to remind myself, I am a survivor, and it’s in the past now. Healing has been a journey and a process. God bless anyone who is going thru this, or went thru this.
Bless you for your comment & strength. I’m proud of you!! ❤
Bless you for your comment & strength!!! I’m proud of you ❤
Congrats On You For Leaving And My Apologies For Everything You Been Through
@@Ohnothetableits
You, dear heart, are SUCH a brave, badass, & inspiring human being! 👏🥹
I am So proud of you & wish you nothing but a peacefully happy, & healed, rest of your existence ☮️💜🎆
I’m sorry you went threw that but so glad you got out
So glad you got out!! You beat your addiction to him!!! I will be 21 months sober from alcohol (my only substance) very soon!! Have zero regrets about quitting!!
This reminds me of the relationship I was in when I was 17. Young and native and wanting a bad boy, I ended up traumatized and still seeking professional help today following multiple incidents of suicide attempts and domestic violence where I was choked, cut and strangled, forced to inject. No relationship is worth dealing with any of that, and it is so incredibly hard to leave those relationships!! So glad we are both out of it Jess!
Anyone who’s dealt with a narcissist (mine was for over 20 years) knows of them driving insanely fast on the highway to scare you into an anxiety ridden breakdown… not to mention the other 100 characteristics they share (ruining all holidays, birthdays, pitting children against you, etc etc🤮) Smfh. Narcissists are the closest thing to the devil, absolute truth.
❤
@@Melli6000
Absolutely to a T!! 100%
Yes, my ex used to delight in making me think he was going to kill us both driving reckless and exremely fast. Who does that unless you're a psychopath?
@@tcshy1903 🤦🏻♀️ what a jerk! Mine would silently do it. I’d express my anxiety, fear or ask why he’s driving so angrily and then he’d gaslight me with the “your so sensitive”, “I’m not angry, you just love to argue”, “You need mental help”. Straight evil!
@Melli6000 I so relate ❤
My father was abusive towards my mother. It took many years because she was not financially independent enough to afford somewhere to live on top of the bills. It took until property taxes that none of us could afford, to leave. Please know that your kids will see what you do for them more than not having a two parent household. My father was just…there. My mom raised me and I’m better for it. It took many years for him to wise up now that he’s in his 70s and alone. He tries to have some relationship with me, especially since my sister wants more than nothing to do with him. I will sometimes communicate with him, because of who I am as a person and my mom’s influence. Keep doing what you’re doing and your kids will be ok
Never thought there was someone that had a very very similar growing up ,now my father is 70 as well and alone, I was struggling today about a few things THANK YOU for sharing lets me know im not alone! ❤
@@aprilwood4322 we’re much more alike in our experiences than we think we are. That’s one good thing about social media and platforms that people can share their stories. People can connect and know they’re not alone in the world. I see you, too. An internet side hug/handshake/awkward wave to you. You’ll be ok, too 💜
Beautifully said. You can't change others, but we can control how we handle situations. Nobody wants a failed relationship, but as long as you protect yourself and your kids and see the signs, then you will know when it's time to get out. None of that was your fault. I see some of the things people say online about you and it's disgusting and appalling but I'm so happy for you and how far you've come. What doesn't kill us truly makes us stronger. S*** I went through two bad relationships but thank God came out the other side. I'll be damned if I ever deal with that shit again. No one knows the struggle unless they bewn in it and lord knows it's a cluster fuck that is impossible to explain.
I am really proud of you for having the courage to leave and share your story. Your vulnerability will help more people than you realize!
It’s been almost 27 years with my narcissist. I empathize with your pain and fear of not knowing. I commend your bravery to leave, I hope to be that brave someday too.
Girl this one hit home for me I am in the exact same situation and completely scared and don't know what to do, we have a child together and that is my reason of hanging on your video is truly inspiring and I hope I can find the strength to do what you did Thank you girl
Wow, thank you Jessica. Sadly we share such similar stories and experiences. You articulated this so well that I think I might send it to some people in my life so maybe they’ll understand it. I can never articulate it right. I feel like saying I was in an abusive relationship is minimizing what it really was, doesn’t do it any justice, falls flat for me. It’s so hard to explain what it was really like living through narcissistic abuse with a severely mentally ill addict, the trauma bond, the horrible lasting literal brain damage. Not everyone has experienced that level of what I consider evil, yeah the drugs and alcohol exacerbate it immensely, but that’s still who they really are, they’re just unable to mask it.
I’ve been watching your channel for YEARS and you’ve helped and taught me so much! So, thank you! I’m so happy you escaped and are milestones further on your healing journey and that you’re being treated the way you deserve, finally. It’s been 4 years since I left. It’s been the hardest work I’ve ever done, but I’ve slowly healed more and more and I’m soooo happy with where I’m at and who I am today. So, you’re getting closer to it being a distant memory that no longer impacts you or has any power over you. ❤️
Listening to this and your description of how they will do anything and everything to make every occasion, everyday about them and more often than not- Way to often than not an extremely traumatic event went along w/ it. It was like you were talking about my ex. I'm now w/ a great guy for over 7 years who continues to help put me back together, I too will forever be changed, but we do heal-its slow and daily.
I'm so happy your out of that, healing, and happy!
Yes that part sounded like my ex too
Im proud of you for being successful in your life with all you've been through may God continue to bless you, Ms. Kent
Jess ❤❤ I admire, appreciate, and am grateful for your openness and vulnerability!! Anyone who can’t see and hear the genuineness when you speak on this topic is only seeing and hearing what they WANT. THANK YOU ❤❤
It's crazy how people can have no idea what's really going on. I thought you had the perfect relationship.
This is the best quality tiny mic I've ever seen!! Great story, thanks for sharing
You never let us down! So glad you made it out alive 💚🩷🦝
Because of you, I learned that my ex-boyfriend was a narcissist and I appreciate you for putting your experiences and everything you’ve went through. It’s taught me a lot and I had an experience like that. He brought up a billboard with the chick with the gorgeous body and I finally got the guts up to say something to him about it and blame it on me like it’s my faultthat she had a better body
Jess, you're doing amazing! So sorry for what you've been through! I was with 2 of them but didn't have any awareness about narcissists until after the second. Thank you for sharing your story, watching videos of other's experiences helped me a lot. Also, you're so beautiful and such a good Mom and such a strong person!! I am so happy for you with the life you have now, you deserve it ❤
My hard, was when my kids said to me, can’t we just leave. I had already been preparing, by purchasing things for our own house. I filed a PFA, I took more than half of our Bank account, I purchased a home, hired a mover, and moved on.
We see how much you healed right now. You look so much better now and I promise it’s gonna be okay.
We love you and so proud of you!! Your happiness is truly showing and we are all here for it!!
My heart breaks for you while also being happy that you are out of the mess and jn a better place. I’ve been in physically & mentally abusive relationships. Yes. That’s plural. I know how to pick ‘em. 🤦♀️ Leaving is so scary and hard. I’m so proud of you for doing it! Sending love!
💯 thank you for being vulnerable with us. Your story could inspire others who are going through the same things.
Hey girl I'm so proud of you. You have gone through so much and have shown us just how strong you are. I believe in you. ❤
You are allowed to talk about things that's happened to you Jess. I love you girl, you help a lot of ppl. 🩷
Thank you for sharing!! Been through it too. Love you Jess!
the way you speak about your children.. center them in the conversation, use them as a driving force for change and to face fears...sacred and so refreshing.
Jess you are awesome and your community is so so proud of you!! Always wishing you the best 🫶🏼
You don’t have to prove anything to anyone. You know what happened. You’re not trying to ruin him you’re trying to heal. And remember, the best parts of life happen off the internet and are often not shared with the internet. 🖤🖤🖤
You are so strong Jessica. I am in awe of you. I am so happy for your happiness now! ❤
There's a band down under names after a much feared union( teamsters) called the Painter's and dockers they have a song named if he beats you leave. It's pretty much the story of a friend of the girls perspective anyway it rings true here. If there's one thing addiction and the reset you need us to own your shit.
Not only have you done this and more by talking about these issues you ARE helping others and we all see how much you have grown and found your truth in a clear voice in a clear head
Well done you Jessica. Keep kicking goals and taking names as it definitely worth it.
Your now enjoy the fruits of a difficult past. You so deserve it. Stay strong.
People leave when staying is scarier than leaving. I'm proud of you!!
Kids aware of everything. They choose to ignore when they’re not sure how to respond to certain situations. I remember a lot of what ppl said around me, when they thought I do my own thing or can’t hear them when I was 4 yo.
I love your videos bcuz youre real! None of us are perfect! I have ptsd from abusive relationships too. Im glad you got away from him. Youre such an inspiration to so many ppl!
🦝🦝 Yessss girl! Been here for years! Love and support you 🫶🏼
Thank you for sharing! This is actually helpful for my healing as well. 🙏 Glad to see you're doing well now and happy!
im so proud of you jess for leaving for showing us all you can ^^ thank u
My narc said the same thing to me. I was really depressed, suicidal ideation, and he said You wouldn’t follow through with that, you can’t follow through with anything. And thats not even the worst thing hes said to me. Being in a toxic narcissistic is the most soul sucking, miserable experience. Yet I still crave his attention and “love”.
Oh jess this is horrific. I'm so sorry for what you went through. So so proud of you ❤❤❤
"I will dress like Adam Sandler till the day I die." PREECH
The shame of it is huge! I can so relate to it!!♥️ God bless you for sharing it.
Thank you for sharing Jess!! I remember watching his stories of his ptsd from the war, I really hope he gets support and help, because I don’t think he’s a bad person I just don’t think he had the skill set, it doesn’t take anything away from the pain that he caused you, and I’m happy that you have so much insight from this, and won’t put up with it again, ever.
PTSD from war don't make some one go and abuse a partner. Not to the extent Jess faced. 😢
@@alexcooper6953 I do agree!!! And that’s why I did state that I really hope he gets support and counselling and I don’t mean that in an offensive way. He did go through things many of us won’t ever understand and that isn’t Jess’ fault by any means but the veterans don’t have the support they need when they come home.
You've been through it and then some. You already know you're helping people. Just knowing there is hope can be enough to save a life or prevent a hospitalization. Thank you, not for me, but for those you help. My issues were much less severe, but, well, three diagnoses aren't nothing. I have someone in my life who pulled me from the brink. Sorry for rambling, but you are that person for so many.
We love you Jess! I'm glad berner is treating you good. Keep pushing forward!
My husband does this... He will hit, punch, and bite himself when I try to dicuss any issue we need to solve. No matter how gentle, understanding, and lovingly I frame things, he would immediately shut down the conversation, accuse me of starting sh*t, and then get violent on himself. He'd leave bruises, black eyes, lumps, bite marks, and even needed 8 Staples in his head from smashing it on the corner of a wall.
I can't conflict resolve w him at all bc he will resort to any means to avoid problem solving, accountability, and changing behaviors. It's very traumatizing to me, yet he demands hugs afterwards, totally dismissing my feelings for his comfort.
We've been separated for 3 years (married for 6, so half that), and I having a really hard time getting to the point of filing.
I REALLY appreciate these videos... They've been very helpful for me and make me feel not so alone in this sort of relationship dynamic. Your growth and healing from this is very inspiring. Thank u for talking abt this difficult topic 🤗
Love u, Jess!
I’m so sorry! 😭❤️🩹
I’m so pleased for you that your life has moved on.
Oh jess 😔 i just love you, i hope you can eventually see exactly how strong you are.
Its amazing how you got through all that, healing takes time, but itll definitely happen, keep your head up ❤
Just know that I think that this shows unimaginable growth for you! You are an amazing person!
Big hugs. It takes awhile to really fully realize everything the abuser did.
You are so brave!!! Thankyou for sharing this story ♡♡♡
Thank you for this post..I'm sure it has helped someone, it takes alot to admit there were mistakes and whoever has the negative comments about 'just get over him' , unfortunately when someone damages your psyche you don't just get over it, you must work though it! 💕💕 Your content!!
Thank you for sharing your story and being vulnerable on such a difficult topic
A little tip about leaving an abusive relationship, especially if there's a trauma bond, try to get some friends with you, to help you carry your stuff out of that place and stay with you after.
When I finally got the strength to leave my abusive ex, two of my besties brought their car, parked down from his apartment, and came up in the stairwell to make sure he wouldn't hurt me or say anything to make me stay, I passed my stuff down to them and they loaded the car and we left.
It felt euphoric, I was finally free, we blasted music and laughed all the way to my dad's house.
We partied that night, had a fun lil' sleepover and I thanked them for everything.
I'm so grateful they were there, because they helped me really feel how much I was better without him, and knowing they were there in case anything happened let me know I was finally safe.
So if you can, get a good support system, and tell your friends that you need to leave so you can make a plan together, having support in this is so helpful! And you deserve it!
Your friends will be happy to get you out of that hell, trust me.
I was in an abusive relationship for ten years with the father of my youngest two children and I will say leaving is SO hard. But she's right when she says staying was hard too. He treated me horribly in front of all my children and my oldest one remembers all of it. I've finally found someone who gives me the world in every possible way and we are getting married next year. I'm clean now after leaving my ex ( which never would have happened if I had stayed) and now my kids can see a happy healthy relationship. And as an added bonus I have my fiance's kids in our lives too. Life is great. 5 kids and a wonderful man. It's about time something went right. :) I'm glad you finally get that too. Everyone deserves to be treated right! Don't let anyone ever make you believe you don't deserve to be happy!
It's better to come from a broken home than to live in one! You did the right thing!!! 💜
LOVE this!!!
Quote Dr Phil! Big love
I don’t agree with the “you pick the hard” but other than that I love your video. I see what you mean. Our stories are very similar. Sending you love.
Only part way through this but wow Jess, this is literally so terrifying. I'm so glad you got out.
So many people can relate to your story & you've already helped way more than you think✌️
I went thru something like this. It took me 7 times before I got out and left. I'm so proud of you and happy to see you and your kids happy and healthy. I've followed you since you had under 7k followers, you have grown in an amazing way 🖤
one time my husband, we have been separated almost 2 years now, had been up for several days on ice. he would always accuse me of cheating & he was so gone he really thought i had a guy upstairs! but he was too scared to go check so he just kept fuckin with me & it eventually got a little physical & he ended up holding me up on the wall & while he was screaming in my face he leaned in & bit my face & took a chunk of skin out of my face! when he looked down at me & seen the blood he almost came back to himself for a min & was crying & apologizing. my daughter was around for a lot of things & she would try so hard to keep him calm and let him know i wasn’t doing anything and nobody else was either. we were trying to get him to just lay down with us and calm down & he got on the phone & calked 911 then hung up. then he did it again. & he literally called 911 on himself 8 times & kept hanging up then when the cops ended up coming to our door he started yelling at me bc i was the one who called the cops according to him. thank god he is now sober & he runs a sober living house now. we aren’t back together & idk if we ever will be but we are able to co parent now and be friends and i am so thankful.
I was with an emotionally abusive covert narcissist for 8 fucking years before I finally found the strength to leave, for the last like year of our relationship I basically just shut down, in retrospect I think I was saving up my energy to leave. Best decision I ever made. I got with him 7 DAYS after getting clean. Wtf was I thinking lol. But I'm seeing a great guy now and I'm working on not having that fight or flight response and things have been going really well. I don't wake up feeling like a different person every day, I feel safe and secure, I don't feel trapped... Your advice is exactly right. If you are not happy, FUCKING LEAVE
I grew up in a toxic , violent house and swore I would never live in a situation like that as a grown-up. Yes , it was traumatic living like that. Common sense told me to avoid people that would treat me like that. I try to understand why anyone would go back to a terrible relationship like that, but I don't know why anyone would do that. I had enough abuse as a child.
BTW, congratulations on getting out of your situation. I also don't understand why people be the ones to move on instead of telling you to move on .
You are so amazing! I have been following you for years. You are a strong person. You are an amazing example to your kids and anyone who watches your videos. Your strength through the abuse and dv is inspiring. You rock! Love ya!
Not sure if I watched ur videos when you first started but I did start a few years ago pre surgery and before you got your teeth done and you were always gorgeous but I’m glad to see you get the success you have and were able to do the things you wanted to do in order to feel good. The last videos I watched were when your ex just relapsed and I am so proud of you for leaving him and moving on. My ex is a narcissist so I just wanted to reach out and say I’m sorry you had to deal with him because being in a relationship with someone who thinks they do no wrong is so fucking hard but the fact they gaslight everyone into thinking they are the problem (as in everyone else, Not them) and it’s just a terror. I’ve never heard “narcissistic abuse” but I feel that to another level. My ex used and abused me and abused his power over me and I am Suffering the consequences. Wishing you and your daughters the best!
“Healing is your responsibility” is something I really understand differently after starting it- and seeing my parent refuse to. I’m not interested in any narrative that it’s her age or her generation, or her cluster b’s. Older generations have been kinder. People in her generation have been kinder (including literally my dad.) I have the borderline I inherited from her. Healing is my responsibility. I don’t want to ever go back to the way I was.
You are brave for speaking up Jess!
The only person you need to worry about letting down is yourself and those babies ❤ you are strong and you got this girl
Despite all the hurt you have been through, how do you let go of the person you love so much even when you KNOW you deserve better? How did you have the strength to keep moving forward? & Not want to go back even to seek comfort or understand the “why”? I’m struggling with this SO much… I’ve never felt so alone or hurt. The ending of this video hit hard… When your body and brain want different things… When you’re heartbroken and hurt… When the person is someone you hate for hurting you but you love them so fucking much. (Please keep in mind, I don’t have family or a support circle in my corner… so feeling “alone” while actually being alone is HARD).
Thank you for sharing. ♥️ For what it’s worth, I’ve never thought that you’ve embarrassed yourself on the internet.
I absolutely believe you, when my narcissistic ex started using meth, his true self came out. He changed so quickly and so much. Even down to the soda he drank. He tried to gaslight me about even something that small. Drugs amplify the dark parts of everyone but when a narcissist gets on heavy mind altering drugs, they cannot hold up their mask anymore.
I think there are people out there who expect the "victim" to be perfect. If there are no perfect people, there are no perfect "victims". We are all just fallible humans fumbling through life. I don't think anyone gets through unscathed, some are just luckier not to deal with absolute horror and madness. Wishing hope to anyone in need of it right now. Stay strong and believe in you.
I’m so happy to hear your getting the love you deserve. I have NEVER seen my mother in a healthy relationship. I’m 35 now and she is about to turn 60 and she is with a complete loser who uses her. The domestic violence I saw growing up was something from a movie. My mother was dragged once by my father in a car that her knees and hands had the worst road rash I have ever seen. She literally could not walk. I don’t recall the actually car dragging but what I mean is I saw the aftermath of my mother, going insane searching for my dad bc I believe he was cheating on her because I remember her bringing us to his parents house or something and she was trying to kick the door down. I was like 7 or younger. Anyways I have never seen a man love her and to now he around her and see that she is gonna die without ever having experienced being treated good or just to be independent and happy is so fucking heartbreaking. I’m going through the hardest time of my life after the worst year of my life and I will die alone before I am ever dealing with a narcissistic abuser and unfortunate my dream guy is also one and I’m not even gonna think about his dumb ass bc I’m embarrassed for myself for even giving him the time of day, early fucking mornings, late nights and random evenings. Fuck that.
My heart goes out to you, Jess. You’ve gone through so much and in the public eye, no less. You’re a badass for leaving, speaking out, and taking care of yourself and your girls. My father was an abusive narcissist and I’m so blessed my mom left him when she did. I was a baby, but like others have said, it’s better to have come from a broken home than to actively live in one.
Loving that "all my exes are sociopaths" energy.
I didn’t realize that a relationship I was in while in my early twenties was toxic. He did all the things your ex did, and blamed me. Never spent time with me, but I was expected to be ready to spend time with him. Abused me in all ways possible. Told me all the things I needed and wanted to hear. He broke up with me, then started to stalk me. He was furious I was going out, having a life so he tried to ruin it. Then he tried to sweet talk me back, mostly because he was broke and couch surfing. I refused and he actually left me alone afterwards. But I changed my phone number and moved, so eventually he probably did come by my old apartment. It’s been over 24 years, and I still have issues. I’m married to a great guy, and he knows everything my ex put me through. You deserve the best, Jess! For you and your girls.❤
This video made me realize that my ex of 16 years was a total narcissistic and so many things make much more sense now as I'm thinking back on shit from the past that he's done...always flipping it on me n never taking accountability...oh I could go on n on but would need 4 years to explain it all (yes it's thats much shit!) Thank you for sharing!
Thank you for speaking up
Been here since day 1 and im so so proud of you. Your resilience is everlasting
“You get to pick your hard”
I can’t tell you how much I needed to hear this right now. It’s not about a relationship, but it still couldn’t be more true for my current situation. So thanks. You did help at least 1 person- me. ❤
(Actually you helped at least 3, because I have 2 kids also. And helping me helps them. Thanks for being so vulnerable, so publicly.)
I've never been a drug addict but I got a story to tell you. My dad died in April. My stepmother treated me like shit. My mom invited me to visit her I said yes my stepmother said that I was not responsible I had to choose between her and my mom I choose my mom I've happy since I moved to Vegas
I appreciate even though these videos may not be treated well by the algorithm, you still talk about these topics because they’re important to you. I’ve been watching some people I know getting with really awful toxic people and not being able to see or talk about how hurtful it is to be with someone like that.
My narcissistic ex hung himself 2 days after I finally left as the ultimate act of control and to hurt me permanently
Jokes on him. That just makes it easier for you to be rid of him
Omg wow so traumatizing. May I ask how are u now? Have u been able to heal from this absolutely aweful situation? Oh I hope so. I’m so glad u know him hanging himself was not about u but about him
@@phoebetonkin8020 yep. His ex told me after she left him he stalked her for years and even in the beginning of our relationship, I had caught him placing a call to her, so I'm sure he would've done the same to me but maybe worse
@@cleosworld9096 I'm okay! Thank you for asking. This all happened at the end of June last year. Luckily I disconnected from the relationship a couple years before it actually ended, and I think that really helped with getting over it. I still have moments of like "wow I don't even really believe that actually happened" so I think I'm somewhat still in shock or maybe denial idk. It was really hard at first
@@manders. oh my gosh that’s actually pretty recent. There’s no right way to feel or right way to move on from trauma. It’s going to take a long time to accept it and fully move on. And that’s ok. You’ve realized it was all him not u so that’s the hardest part. We naturally wanna blame ourselves and u aren’t. One day you’ll wake up and realize wow I been good for so long. U haven’t thought about it or cried or had a dream or any trauma response in a long time. But that might take a very long time and that’s ok. U will find the perfect partner one day and he’ll just be a distant memory
I needed this. I'm sorry, Jess.
JESS! I haven't been seeing your videos and I thought maybe you had taken another break. Then I decided to go to your channel to check and there are a bunch of new videos! It showed me as not subscribed which I know is bullshit because I would NEVER have done that! God YT sucks sometimes 😤
Anyways I resubed and can't wait to binge your new videos!
Love you and congrats on your awesome engagement! 🫶
THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS! Seriously, I cannot thank you enough. You may never realize how many women and children you may have just saved with this video. Or how many victims you made something really finally, “CLICK”, and have the strength to NOT go back.
I’m so glad to see your pride in doing this for your yourself and your kids and teaching your kids not to stand for that and that that NEVER has to be their norm! You’re an excellent mother. And this is something I’ve thought several times before, but I’d love some parenting content from you. If you’re comfortable of course, but I’ve head so many things you’ve said about parenting or your parenting style or theories and it was so helpful. I’d love more info about how you discuss substance abuse in their parents with them (whether the parent is in active addition or recovery) and specifics on examples of what’s age appropriate. Also, how you told your kids that yall had to leave daddy’s house and the differences about that topic now that you’ve been out a little bit.
thanks again, Jess.
Jessica keep on Lady. What you are doing needs to be done so bad! Your purpose is so much bigger than you know. Speaking out and speaking up helps you but it also helps so many others that need to hear it! Your reward for what you went through is this beautiful new life you have! You deserve it!❤️🩹❤️
it’s been a decade since i’ve gone through this and your videos help me so much! a decade later im realizing i still have triggers i didn’t even know about. it’s amazing what the body stores! i love hearing you share it helps me process even so long later. thanks for another great video ❤
i am sorry with what you went threw with your ex i am appreciate you sharing your story with ur fans on your youtube channel. part of your story touched me and thats what kept engaged in your channel. have a good evening jess and see u on ur next video take care.
I’ve never been around anyone who has had a drug addiction but I’ve always been intrigued by it which led me to find your channel years ago and I just want to say that you are so strong. There is so much drama around you but to the ride or dies it’s all just noise. I have never felt that you have been insincere when telling your story and it’s one of the reasons I still love watching you so much! Keep it up Jess and congratulations on your engagement!