Monster Factory Wrestling Federation: MONSTER MANIA
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 19 ก.ย. 2024
- Eleven of Polygon's most dangerous monsters collide in the squared circle at Monster Mania. See friendships tested, rivalries unleashed, and barriers broken. This is the grandest stage-- the final confrontation. This is Monster Mania!
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My heart stopped when pan pan threw randy
I was kinda hoping for a Chiquita Dave + Chiquita Dave tag team, but I'm not gonna complain when we got that righteous pitch by our dear tossboy.
Life is suffering and I swear the chat exploded when that happened... EVERYONE WAS MIND BLOWN
Life is suffering A stadium rumbling upset, possibly greater than the '98 upset when The Undertaker threw Mankind off Hell In A Cell, sending him plummeting 16 ft through an announcer’s table.
What's the time Stamp?
@30:08 it is G L O R I O U S
*"Sometimes your arms are simply too short to box with God."*
CuteSpaceDragon I need this on a shirt so bad
Patrick Gill is an incredible treasure
Gotta give credit to Punk
said the old cowboy narrator.
apparently thats a quote from something, not a pat original
My roommate pointed out that The Final Pam didn't bring it home until the moment Turbovicki abandoned the fair fight and brought out that weapon..... because Pam was just toying with Turbovicki. Pam wasn't there to win. She was there to break Turbovicki's spirit, to drive her to the point of abandoning her morals. Amazing.
YES. I LOVE THIS.
OH DEAR LORD.
I just thought that Turboviki was giving Pam a massage. Pam was like, no go on, this is nice. Did you not see how chill she was when lying on the mat?
“God forgive me.”
this is so important
I love that the boys gave up on turbovicki the moment they saw that Final Pam was her opponent
When I see Final Pam in any context, my sort of gut reaction is to give up on everything immediately.
We are all fans of Turbo playing pickle ball.
We only get to live as second characters in Pams world. For now.
Disappoited that they didnt even hold a memoriam for Christopher Christopher Christopher Christopher.
I mean, he was THE original wrestle boy.
All proceeds from ticket sales were donated to The Pebble Foundation, a clone advocacy organization
Next year should have a Pebble Memorial Battle Royale
If you'll recall, The Pebble died around the same time Jorstin made his wrestling debut.
Is that:
Christopher Christopher Christopher "The Pebble" Christopher,
Christopher Christopher "The Pebble" Christopher Christopher,
or Christopher "The Pebble" Christopher Christopher Christopher?
Christopher Christopher "Christopher" "the Pebble" Christopher can be easily revived through Rock "the Dwayne" Johnson's flesh centrifuge.
"Borth has a very kick oriented offense" If you recall the borth video where griffin gives him thunder legs, this is 100% canon. I appreciate the research put into this.
I dont know if its research if they are your characters?
I gave your likes that funny number everyone talks about. Aren't I a cool boy
@Xavier Carbonneau the months have not been kind to the funny number sadly
Part of me feels like Patrick might be making up some of these wrestling terms but I simply don't know enough about wrestling to refute any of it.
He's actually doing a pretty god job lol
It sounds like he watches endless wrestling because he calls the moves mostly accurately and very specifically. He even tipped us off to which company he watched as a kid by calling a certain move "scorpion death drop."
glad I'm not the only now struggling on that end
28:55 Nah, trapezius muscles are totally legit
L eiram not sure if you are being sarcastic but trapezius is a real muscle
i love how they remember each of their monsters. the way justin goes "awh its chiquita dave" without skipping a beat is the best
how could one forget such precious children?
On the other end of the spectrum is his quiet “oh no” at the reveal of toucan dan
5 years later and "Is this Shinsuke Nakamura's entrance?" "This is Toucan Dan's entrance." still gets me every single time
14:15 for anyone wondering
Pat understanding how important it is to not break kayfabe lol
Y'all are Sleeping on how great of a Joke "Yellow vs Yellow: The Saffron Pile-on" is
Um.... Please explaine?
@@alchemicmercury saffron is a yellow spice and it rhymes
@@ladyvoldything oh cool! Thank you.
Justin is so damn quick :)
I thought it was a nickname for Borth, cuz I heard "Saffron Pylon"
But tbh that sounds like a great entrance nickname, like:
"TONIGHT ON MONSTER FACTORY! Yellow Vs. Yellow, the Saffron Pylon vs. Maxiumum Potassium! BORTH VS. DAVE!"
"How did she get out?" Griffin, I'm shocked. As her co-creator you should know above all else that the real question is "How would you keep The Final Pam in?"
Griffin isn't the Co-Creator
The Final Pam was not created. The Final Pam has no master. She was, is, and always will be a being beyond our mortal comprehension. You cannot create what has always been. You cannot control that which resides outside of time and space as we know it…
She isn’t a creation of man. She just _is._
She merely allowed Justin and Griffin to recreate her physical form in Fallout 4 so she could return to a world that has long since forgotten her, at her own behest.
YOU DO NOT FIX PAM WITH HAMMER, PAM FIX YOU WITH FIST
such a shame that Melissa was disqualified due to the apple substance abuse scandal, she would have made a fine addition to the roster
Elinoria Yeah then recently there’s been the gun overdose scandal with Doctor Sexgun and then there was Freddy Slimeburger’s murder, things haven’t been the same in the MFF
*Mëlissa
Shame indeed
NOTHING COULD HAVE PREPARED ME FOR THAT PAN-PAN RANDY JOHNSON REVERSAL SWEET JESUS
im going to marry The Final Pam and no one will stop me
cheska magalang you'll have to contend with Trash Hulk and, even harder, Metal Husband. Good luck, buddy.
The Phantasm thanks bucko
***** i'll fite that cockroach _right here, right now_ (also i think u mean "she" haha)
cheska magalang im going to marry the final pam with you
If there are problems with your baby, she'll fix em. Knows how to make a snack, too.
"You do not want those powerful legs wrapped around you"
"I mean, you DO... You DEFINITELY want that"
If turbovicki won it would have been the zag of the century
Let's be honest, we knew who was going to win the second we saw that wild girl.
Her mistake was grabbing the sledge hammer. Once Final Pam knew the rules were off she could unleash her true powers. Turbovicki isn't a good heel to be honest, not very believable
I got zagged on for sure by Panpan and RandyJohnson with that final move though
If by some off chance Turbovicki had won, it would have only been on account of Final Pam letting her win, since the world bends to her will.
I would have burned down my entire neighborhood if The Final Pam lost.
they did the impossible. they got me to watch 40 minutes of the wrestling without any of the story.
I wish I could embroider, so that I could make a sweet pillow case with "Sometimes your arms are simply too short to box with God" over an elegant portrait of the Final Pam.
Yes, I would buy a hundred of these
Or a lovely cross-stitch piece.
You've given me the perfect idea
@@AFarmerCalledChicken ok so I had forgotten about this comment, but: in fact, a comment on a DIFFERENT monster factory video, maybe two years back, finally made me learn to cross-stitch. Show me what you make!!
@@apeacebone6499 I feel like I have arrived at this video at the right moment in history. If you ever make this, I will for sure buy it!
Patrick, I thought you were a great Monster Factory guest. Your wrestling knowledge was greatly appreciated. I especially enjoyed the line, "Sometimes your arms are too short to box with God."
This line made me crack up so hard, lol!
at 18:26 squirtle just kinda rolls out of the ring of his own volition? u ok, squirtle?
> Can't run from a fight!
He's the oldest boy out of all of them, he needed a minute to catch his breath.
he was trying to find the ocean
Junker does the same thing at 19:07
I didn't notice that before, and now I'm wheeze-laughing thank you for pointing it out
"That's not good wrestling Toucan Dan, you have to do the things!"
This Monster Factory Wrestling Federation thing is straight genius.
Toucan Dan looks like if Ganondorf went to clown college in the Jojo's Bizarre Adventure universe.
why would you say something so controversial yet so brave
Holy shit that's accurate
Are you suggesting he's a stand?
Borth looks a lot like bart
That's so specific and yet you managed to nail that right on the head
absolutely wild wrestle boys. im praying for a sequel to this
I want this so badly.
joshua and cheese I want to see some Knive Dad wrestling and many more beautiful children....
Truck Shepard vs. Knife Dad 2k18
It’s been….5 years
"one time only" if this doesn't happen every year, i'm shutting down polygon.
And polygon was supposed to be shut down
@@itsjustjaketv6666
Well... He didn't stutter...
I'd just like to say: since Final Pam was "killed" by a nuclear weapon in her first episode, it's clear that conventional combat can hurt her - even end her. However, Final Pam's power resides in her ability to come back from death - therefore any victory over her is possible, but temporary. So, this can be canon.
Hm hm~ That is not correct, because Pam was not born a god, she earned that power throughout her journey. Pam in her first episode had nowhere near the power of Pam of the last episode. And, given her attire, the Pam in this event was from after the events of those three episodes, at which point she was powerful enough to destroy a game from the inside and definitely could not be killed.
Interesting... Technically, she got this outfit from The Room of Stuff, which was before Vault 95 - in which she ascended to level 5000. So, this could be between those two events.
Really, the issue would be if she lost. That would be... madness. Vicki landing a hit is not that odd - the Deathclaw did, as well as various Dimaond City citizens. Her One Punch of Death not shattered Vicki's fragile body like a dump truck over bird bones?
Maybe Pam held back?
AGuyWithAChannel that seems the most likely solution. Maybe she felt bad for Vicki and was afraid it would be too demoralizing to beat her in one hit. Or maybe she wanted more of a challenge.
it is also worth noting that turbovicki is the most powerful human being to exist, ever, at any point, and is on record as claiming Saitama's workout routine is "alright for beginners." insofar as any of the denizens of the Factory stood a chance against the Final Pam, Turbovicki had the best shot at it.
shame about the whole "trapped in the ring with an eldritch god of destruction" thing
The attention to detail in recreating (almost) every character is honestly impressive!
Oh my god! The role reversal with PanPan and Randy Johnson!
The Final Pam showed mercy upon the young, naive Turbovicki by allowing her to get hits in. The Final Pam may as well have been playing tickle fights with her younger sister. She allowed Turbovicki to lay blows upon her so as to teach Turbovicki and to give Turbovicki a sense of self-worth and self-confidence, just as any loving older sibling would do.
The Final Pam did not suffer blows--she simply allowed Turbovicki to lay her hands upon her older sister's powerful meat.
But in the end, The Final Pam had to remind her cocky sister who's in charge.
if i remeber correctly Pam is Vicki's mom
oh my god youre RIGHT, parapa is her dad. gotta teach your daughter a lesson
She had to show her daughter that she was strong, but not strong enough
This is the best comment
@@mildlydistressedmaninaturt5452 it's the only way for turbovicki to grow to her utmost potential
So many beloved, glistening kings and queens of monsterdom! It's a shame Truck couldn't make an appearance because his whole dang face is prohibited
AnotherWesley Honestly, I think he was disqualified because his chin would impale anyone he fights
I think that having a shapeshifting eldritch face disqualifies you unfortunately.
alchemic mercury Well that and he probably would instantly snap anyone out of existence who happens to look at him
I have a theory that the Dark Souls match actually was slated to be a ladder match, but #Noid, scorned at not being invited, stole the briefcase before the match could even begin.
is nobody going to talk about the rumours that Turbovicki could in fact be the daughter of Parappa the Rappa and Final Pam? Was this a potential mother-daughter showdown??
Well they are only rumors, like Area 51 or Half Life 3
That’s why Final Pam had to win. She had to show her daughter who was the all powerful God in this universe
I believe that the Final Pam is turbovicki’s patron saint, imbuing her with the skills she exhibits, but when Vicki got cocky and started claiming it was through her own abilities her god had to smite her
Pat's accurate pro wrestling commentary turns this whole thing into art.
three dad's down is my favorite band
This is the only good way to do fanservice, thank you Polygon
This is the stupidest best, greatest thing I've ever seen in my entire life.
Pat deserves more credit for so heartily embracing this concept. I love the line "This is Toucan Dan's entrance"
the final pam vs. turbovicki, a.k.a an unstoppable force vs. an immovable object
Does Pat know A LOT about wrestling or is he INCREDIBLE at bullshitting?
DEVIN SCHWARZ I'ma let you know that Pat's ringside commentary is WAY better than that of the current announcers who get PAID to talk about matches.
I have never and will never watch professional wrestling but this makes me so happy to hear, Pat is such a good boy
he's actually guested on the Wrestling On Air podcast before (and his explanation of the Golden Lovers in Japan on Gill and Gilbert kinda got me into wrestling recently lol)
Hello from 5 years in the future.
As a wrestling fan, I can confirm that Pat’s commentary is ON POINT.
Literally just have some thought. I know very little about wrestling but I know a lot of how funny Pat is.
Toucan dans entrance fuckin kills me
Haha. "Chiquita Dave doesn't have traditional organs. It's mostly just banana meat in there..."
it is very weird having someone competently commentating on this when we're used to the mcelroys screamin' and hollerin but it's so good nice touch guys
truly so happy to be listening to this commentary with these characters so happy
I love how their first selling point was their boys. Everything comes after the boys.
Vas Saus Except Nick. That guy can get fucked.
Kinda sad to see The Final Pam hurting her daughter like that :/ but I guess when to comes down to it, nothing will stop Pam, not even familial bond
Hmm in all likelihood Turbovicki was the offspring of Trash Hogan, and Final Pam cares only for Metal Husband's sweet boys
MeiaLua Very true, I didn't even consider that. Maybe Turbovicki did so well because she was trying to fight for her mother's love? But no amount of training can turn her flesh to steel, and so she may forever live in the shadow of coffee grounds...
Final Pam must ensure that she is THE Final Pam.
Haylee Beth but this is generations past, turbovicky died in a cycling accident to be replaced by turbosusan
Mikkel Hansen That's what they want you to think
I'm still surprised how close every character looks to their monster factory equivalents
Literally every character in this has 1000% more backstory than anyone in WWE
I cannot believe how perfect everything about this is. The custom characters, the entrances they assigned to each of them, even the specifics of each match. PLEASE do another one of these in 2018.
Or 2021
pan pan throwing randy johnson sure was the biggest zag of 2017.
MONSTER MANIA II:
April 8, 2018
MATCH 1: Cousin Special Agent (Ghost) , Daytrader Vader, and Dark Vader vs. Truck Shepard, Dino Lansbury, and DAZ
MATCH 2: Randy Johnson and Panpan (with Elsa and Dr. PhIl vs. Rat Baby and Succotash (With Vape Life)
MATCH 3: The Boy Mayor and Totino's vs The Junker and Squirtle
MATCH 4: (The winners of the last two matches will face off for the MONSTER FACTORY TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP)
MATCH 6: D-Bomb vs. Knife Dad MONSTER FACTORY CHAMPIONSHIP
MATCH 7: Trüllbus vs. Jorstin -Christopher Christopher Christopher Christopher Memorial Championship
MATCH 8: G.A.R.F.I.E.L.D vs. Busto vs. Bonedogg -POLYGON.COM championship
MATCH 9: The Final Pam vs. Todd Howard (If Todd wins, he gains control of Polygon.com)
this took so long
I WANT THIS!
This has exactly 69 likes and I will leave it as such
This needs to happen
This is the kind of behavior that really inspire brand loyalty
This is the happiest I have ever been watching a video. I don't know if my life will ever get better than the moment The Campaign strolled onscreen.
No matter how many times I watch this, Justin's quiet "Oh no" when Toucan Dan's name pops up leaves me in tears every time
17:01 the sight of Toucan Dan standing there like a polite lil vascular boi, waiting for squirtle the squirting turtle man to get in position, only to be decked by a right hook directly in the face utterly destroyed me
I look forward to it every time I watch this
Can we have Final Pam vs Busto?
Because, man, I really want to see a fight between the two god-like creatures bent on escaping their worlds to destroy all of reality. It'd be *the* fictional fight of the century.
idk if Dragon Ball Z Budokai Tenkaichi 3's character editor is flexible enough, and that's just the only engine that could properly depict their war
Fictional?
That would be so intense, holy shit
unstoppable force meets immovable object.
can't do it. no machine is powerful enough. and I read if you put the two of them together, you'll go deaf instantly so........
randy johnson and panpan are the wlw mlm solidarity we deserve
Can we really just appreciate the improv phrase "The Saffron Pile-on"? Jesus that's good Juice.
Patrick's commentary is so on point here. I don't know if the moves he's naming are real but I believe him
I think a canonical explanation for the last fight is that what we were seeing wasn't truly Final Pam, who is still sealed away. She is just so powerful that she was able to manifest her presence in this arena for this event. But of course, a metaphysical projection of her form is not going to have nearly the same god-like powers as the actual thing, allowing a talented athlete such as Turbovicki to land a few blows.
I really love that they didn't forget that Randy Johnson is a woman. I feel like a lot of ppl forget that. She's a stronk giant woman.
Susan Crushbone vs Bone Dogg. This needs to happen
unfortunately it's right there in the names. we already know who would win.
+Fopenplop That's how Bone Dogg gets you. Don't forget he can stop time and kill you with one kiss.
Josh Lane Bone Dogg is also gay. He wouldn't want to use his kiss powers on Susan. His fatal attack is also his fatal flaw.
+Lena Carey I'm not sure attraction factors into the lethality of Bone Dogg's kisses. And if it does, it'd still be a devastating blow to Susan
of course, you're right, how could anyone deny her advances? she's the goddess of seduction.
it's just so upsetting to me that the raw eroticism of shinsuke nakamura's entrance has been applied to toucan dan, thus forcing me to become attracted to toucan dan
I too am deeply aroused by a grown man making midair finger turkeys
@@SeleneRoseRMI think it’s more the confidence on display. And the pelvic movement
Pan-pan throwing Randy Johnson is still the greatest wrestling moment of all time.
This confirms my theory that Final Pam is actually the mother of both Undertaker and Kane
This is still the greatest single video Polygon has ever made.
If this isn't becoming an annual thing I'm going to be really sad.
The tension between Toucan Dan and The Junker was unreal... they only had eyes for each other
"The choke slam... the choke Pam..."
3 Dads Down is my favorite early 2000s rock band
this was almost 42 minutes of pure ecstasy.
"Sometimes your arms are simply too short to box with god"- is a amazing quote from this series
there needs to be another version of this video with the b-class monsters that didn't make the cut
i cant get over how perfectly straight-faced Patrick manages to be
Matchups:
(Click the jump for spoilers!)
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.
.
.
.
.
.
00:00 *The Saffron Pile-On* -- Borth Sampson vs. Chiquita Dave
12:19 *3-Way Souls Smash* -- The Junker vs. Toucan Dan vs. Squirtle
23:02 *Small Boys and Big Boys* -- The Boy Mayor and Chef Totino's vs. Randyjohnson and Panpan
32:52 *Ultimate Athlete vs. Ultimate Being* -- Turbovicki vs. Final Pam
I tell you, one thing that really struck me about this match is how he's just like Bart.
More please.
Honestly, I'd love to see a series where they just make new monsters in the wrestling game and pit them head to head. Imagine splitscreen character creator action, working from a common starter theme, and then bring in a third voice to sort of flip back and forth between the two.
"Now Griffin, I see you took the 'squirtle' prompt in an interesting direction here..."
And then at the end they fight.
Toucan Dan- the Toucan Man with the Toucan Plan.
the spooky kabuki toucan man
I got a feeling that this Mayor Boy gonna end up POTUS for some reason
Only if dogs get to vote
it's such a catch-22. The Boy Mayor is the only candidate brave enough to support a cause like dog suffrage.
i cannot believe turbovicki fought her own mom
chloe t SJHSGDJSLDDLALD OH MY FUKCIGMG GOD UR RIGHT
Only the child of Pam could have survived that long in the ring against her.
Im glad Final Pam was a good sport and allowed turbo Vicky some great publicity by allowing her to bring her to the ground for a two count.
00:00 Intro [Welcome To The Factory]
00:30 Bort vs. Chiquita
11:17 We Got Boys [Polygon Advertisement]
12:21 Junker vs. Toucan vs. Squirtle
21:14 Birthing Demons [Monster Factory Advertisement]
23:01 Tag Team: The Campaign vs. Toss Team
31:43 Hoop Dreams [CoolGames Inc. Advertisement]
32:52 Turbovicki vs. Final Pam
41:30 Outro [DLM - Downloadable Monsters]
JustinJKJ l
"Infinity War is the greatest crossover event of all time."
*Me, an intellectual:*
Anyone else replay this vid all the time...especially before bed...as you drift off into a peaceful sleep? Just me?
a few months ago i started using this (& other monster factory vids) to help lull me to sleep... and now i physically cant sleep without griffin&justin's dulcet tones slithering around my earholes :///
i adore the personality that the animations gave to these characters.
That randy johnson toss had me literally shouting at my computer.
I cried at the Boy Mayor and Totino's team being named "The Campaign" this is so good
if monster mania had like two or three more episodes i think i could actually begin to consider myself a wrestling fan. i love this and revisit it often.
I am loving this NPR announcer commentary.
NPR Presents: Monster Factory Wrestle Boys
I was never into wrestling really, just couldn’t get invested, then, I saw this, and I understood.
I would love to see the creation of all these. They all look fantastic
Space Spider luckily, they have a whole series solely devoted to that. it's a good day to be a boy
this was almost terrible to watch i didnt realize how attached i had become to these beautiful menaces until i had to watch them fight
It’s been 3 years and it’s still insane how accurate the monsters have been remade
34:50 Final Pam with the classic player.placeatme.FoldingChair 1 move.
"Sometimes, your arms are too short to box with God."
30:10 IM SHOOK PANPAN MY SWEET BOY
So this is going to be a recurring event, right? Because this was fantastic.
I think I watch this video once a month. It’s become favorite wrestling tape.
She got it in one. "Subscribe to polygon for the boys"
"Yellow vs. yellow, it's the saffron pile-on" jeebus Justin you beautiful genious
can i just say i want a 2.0 of this video with all of the new monster boys?
WHY NO PEBBLE OR SUCCOTASH?
You heck'n weaboo the pebble died, remember? rip sweet angel
Christopher Christopher "Christopher" Christopher will always live on... Besides, all Rock the Dwayne Johnson has to do to make another is to fire up the meat centrifuge.
He was too busy learning vape secrets from Ratbaby
steak steak rip... RIP THAT SWEET VAPE IN PEACE!
When did Christopher Christopher "The Pebble" Christopher Christopher die? I never got this memo!