Then, once the town population grows a bit, that Dairy Queen will go out of business, and the building will be taken over by the most amazing family operated Mexican restaurant, or an independent pizza shop, which never seems to expand or gather much attention from anyone outside of their town and maybe one or two neighboring towns.
@@Cyber-Riot The town I grew up in had a Dairy Queen. It was dirty as hell. It went out of business. Then it got bought by KFC. Which was dirty as hell. It went out of business. Then that building got bought by Taco Casa, stripped to the bone, cleaned more than I have ever seen a company clean something and rebuilt on the inside for Taco Casa. It stands to this day and last time I visited, the inside was still immaculate.
Our town has council that definatly does not want our small town to grow. For the longest time there was only Dairy Queen but now we have Jack's. Trickle a couple of Dollar Generals and mom and pop restaurants and stores and banks. No movie theater or bowling alley. Nothin'.
My favorite is the one that is only still on the location because it's a superfund site and no actual business is willing to pay any money to purchase it and clean it up, even though it would otherwise be worth millions of dollars because it's right off the interstate exit.
My town still has a theater. I can relate to the... There will always be rumors because I see this as our future. I am worried it won't be there much longer...
My town had a theater, and then it didn't because of local politics. And then there were rumors it's come back. And then they stopped when they realized the guy didn't have any interest in a town that basically has government that hates him. XD
My town as a 1950s movie theater. Keeps closing down and reopening as the owners give up and new ones try to make it work. Needs renovation badly as the seats are still the original velvet and last time I was in there the crying room was being used for storage.
So true! My town has one and every single time I go inside there's no one there other than the owner. A former LEO family member told me why he thought businesses like this stay open but it's not legal 😮. Before that store opened, someone else opened a "second hand mattress and furniture store." It stayed open for around a year or two. I never saw anyone go inside.
If you were also curious what town they had on the map, it’s Jasper, Alabama. And by the looks of it, they do have 15 Dollar Generals within 15 minutes of the city center
I live in an unincorporated town in North Alabama and Matt was pretty spot on in describing our community. We recently had Wendy's move in and they have had a full parking lot with a line of cars wrapped around the building since opening day. I never thought I'd see people so excited about Wendy's for so long. I keep waiting for the fever to break. The new strip mall included a mattress store to go along with the mattress store we already had at the other strip mall. I've never seen a human soul enter either location. I believe they are used by the FBI to place families in Witness Protection.
The neighboring town's mystery mattress store turns temporarily into a fireworks store every June. I don't think I've seen anybody go in then either lol.
My "small town" (Harrison, AR) just had a Popeye's open up a couple weeks ago in an outlot at the strip mall with the theater and the TSC and Big Lots. There was a LINE around the building and out into the turn lane into the parking lot all day every day for a week solid. If you wanted in the lot, you had to use the entrance/exit at the other end! God forbid you want to use the laundromat up the little hill behind the TSC, because you couldn't get in there. That line took you an HOUR to get through to get chicken!
Hey I from here as well. Can’t believe all the cotton fields that my friends and I used to play in are gone….and I’m only 23. That is how fast we have exploded. I know they will incorporate soon and we probably need it, but it’ll be a sad day.
This is too relatable and therefore painful. The chamber of commerce in my town thought a movie theater would corrupt the youth, so replaced it with; nothing. So they all joined gangs and started smoking weed for want of something to do. Good job, Chamber!
This is exactly the reason why I don’t like being in a place less than 50,000 people at least in a place that’s at least that big you can have a Target js
The movie theaters are dying, a really nice skate park and some ball fields are better for kids than anything. Their gang could be what team they play on instead.
gangs in a small town that took away the movie theater? lmao. gotta call bs on this comment. Sounds like a comment made up for likes. Unless it was something like the john deeres vs the kubotas or something....
As a physical therapist, one of the goals for our patients has to be directly from the patient. I had the sweetest elderly man tell me he wanted to get back to his ROMEO group that met for breakfast at the Hardee's. ROMEO, you ask? Retired Old Men Eating Out!
I once passed through a small town that had one Italian restaurant as the sole restaurant in town and they had a sign in the window announcing that they now served Mexican food.
Lived in a town of ~14,000 people. There were 3 mattress stores within 4 blocks of each other. Not a single person I ever talked to in 6 years ever bought a mattress from any of them. It has to be a front of some kind.
They're always a front of some kind! Worst is, you'll be driving my and they have that dingy looking buntin' up with a 'Under New Management' sign up! Yep, the mod boss probably got arrested and there's a new one on the throne of underground mattress-owned mafias.
Well everyone knows, "you should get a new mattress every 8 years" You simply hadn't lived there long enough, another 2 years and *everyone* would have gone to one of them stores 😅
We just aren't Target people. We're the Walmart people that go to Target once in a blue moon and gaze in awe at the fancy people stuff while the fancy people stare in horror at us.
Things change all the time but unironically. Walmart's innovation was building outside of cities to reduce location cost, and using their size to bully companies into giving them products for cheaper, including selling under cost and making it back on other products. For instance almost every laptop at Walmart has downgraded RAM or something (like Dell will make LP-1 for its website and LP-1-WM for Walmart) and they're really using the cut-rate laptop to sucker you into buying groceries there, or whatever. Target's innovation was intentionally buildings its stores in the maximally inconvenient way, for instance they might put plates on the exact opposite end of the store from grocery making the customer walk more and therefore impulse buy more. So you might go to Walmart because they have an insanely cheap TV (which has a downgraded backlight compared the "real" model direct from the company, and they hope you buy groceries on the way out to make back their margin). But at Target, you probably always go to the opposite ends of the store all the time, like if office supplies are to the left maybe grocery is on the right. That's how each store tries to get you in different ways.
had I read your comment 2 years ago I wouldn't even know what a dollar General store was. then I moved to a small town in the south. 24 stores near where I am. tons of churches too. Catholic church is even located within walking distance of the biggest bar in town (not surprised by this one tho)
You just perfectly described the community where I live. I'm in one of the neighborhoods with an HOA and we used to hold our annual meetings at the local library. After a few heated "discussions", they required us to have a sheriff's deputy in attendance to "keep the peace". 😄😄😄
I remember visiting a small town with less than 800 people and realizing they had a Family Dollar, Dollar Tree and General Dollar all within walking distance of each other and somehow all these stores seemed new construction, well stocked and busy with shoppers.
Well I'm jealous! We have maybe 800 in our sleepy little town. All we have is a DG and it's only been here 8 years. We don't even have a traffic light! I would love to have a grocery store. I've heard that people don't want one. It would change the town too much. I understand all that but it would be nice not to have to drive 30-46 minutes to a Walmart or Dillons.
I used to live in an area that had a certain brand of supermarket, and that exact *same* brand of supermarket, RIGHT NEXT DOOR. both about same age & quality.
@@lilithbrantley4930 we don't have a stop light either! But we did get a Dollar General a few years ago. I'm never going in, though. The ladies at Grace Thrift are just too darn sweet.
Ours was a Pizza Hut before it became a Carl's Jr...before it became a vacant building. You can still see the evidence of both failed businesses on the outside, which just makes it extra sad.
@@TheCharleseye Even the giant food chains were hurting over the last couple of years. Lots of places, particularly locally-owned restaurants, went out of business due to the draconian COVID lockdowns.
Not just a mattress store, but an entire furniture store. You also need a couple of other suspicious-looking shops, like a used appliance store and maybe an herb shop/homeopathy store. Oh! And aside from the major chain restaurants, you need at least two locally-owned diners. One has to be the "good" diner and the other the "bad" diner. The good diner has friendly folks and the food is excellent. The bad diner has rude folks and tastes like prison leftovers. And you can't forget the Waffle House.
Waffle House is just assumed, like the Fire Department, or that factory building that's been closed for 50-100 years. How else would FEMA know how bad a natural disaster is without the Waffle House disaster scale?
Grew up rural small town. We didn't have a waffle house. Still don't. There is one diner in the city over.they have always had a pizza hut and a Walmart.
My wife & I watched this at the same time … and we both said “dollar generals” right before you said it. It’s THAT true. What we had never thought about - that is also VERY true - is the mattress stores with no customers. (My 14yo would call those “sus.”)
In Cassopolis, MI there's a spot where Dollar General and Dollar Tree are each 1/2 of a building. How about putting in a 99 cent store for the budget minded?
As a person from a small town that exploded to a big town in my lifetime... this is accurate. Lack of planning means it takes 45 minutes to get across town. .. but on the plus side, when I say where I'm from, I can now say the actual name instead of the next big city!
My town also went from not even on the map to being a city in my lifetime, and I can confirm that the road design has not improved. They're better maintained now though. Got lines on 'em and everything.
@@munky9808You hit waayyyy too close to home with that...which IS in Florida. The part of Florida that doesn't have Orlando, Tampa, West Palm, etc nearby.
Don't forget the random old railroad track that hasn't seen a train in years, and the massive empty lot in the middle of town that locals say "used to be an old mansion" or "that's where the old grocery store was", or something else along those lines.
So, I moved to a small town in the country. 3 weeks ago I got a part time, evening job at the local Dollar General. I feel like I’m living through one of your sketches every shift.
I am from a county like this. Like 7,000 people and only 3 families. We still own a farm there but all of us moved away after about 35 years, cause the locals look at us and go "Yall aint from around here are ya." That place is just a bit different.
I always thought a small town was under 500 people. Our county seat is about 7,000... With over 10k you don't have to combine 3 schools from 5 towns to get enough guys to play 8 man football...
This is extremely accurate lmao. The hunt's brothers comment hit close to home too. The only thing you forgot was to add a bunch of local businesses that shut down within a year, and a bunch of deserted gas stations on the corner
In our state, you also need the discount tobacco shop, the ABC (state-run store for the sale of alcohol), and a pawn shop. Oh, and a CVS/Walgreens/Rite-Aid. On a side note, I come here to read the comments as much as I do to watch Matt's hilarious content.
We had the Aldi's rumor for years! The empty lot finally had a car wash built on half of it and years later the Dollar Store just built a new building on the other half...
Small Town America is slowly becoming the 1,000 Dollar General employees, and two tradesman for each trade to do repairs on the Dollar Generals and the employee's homes lol
I was warming up my fingers to mention the Dollar General, but you nailed it like always! Every time a DG or Mattress Firm goes up, and angel weeps in Heaven. 🙄
Hardee's being the senior center got me. We met one of my dad's friends' dad there and he mentioned that my grandfather has been eating/loitering there for months. Good times
😂😂😂 I had to pause it so I could laugh a loooong time at the Hardee’s/Senior Center comment. I lived 27 years in a very small NC Town. When we moved there in 1990 there was a Skat’s on Main St. It was bought out by Hardee’s and became, I kid you not, Hardee’s Skat Thru, then eventually a full fledged Hardee’s. Same group of senior citizens occupied the same tables from opening until mid-morning throughout the evolution.
When traveling with the kids at gradeschool age we stopped at a Hardee's west of St. Louis on I44 for breakfast. The old folks kaffeeklatsch had a bingo game going and let the kids play with them. My daughter won a Hardee's gift certificate. Nothing like a gathering of doting grandparents.
We don't have a Hardee's, we have Classic Burger and it's like you have to be 65+ to eat there. Every day it's like the old folks home sent people there on a field trip or something.
The combination strip mall and a ridiculous amount of storage centers in one place reminded me of where I lived for a while. It wasn't a small town, it was part of a city technically, but it was so sparse with so many trees, I wouldn't blame anyone for thinking it was its own thing.
This is almost exactly the town I grew up next to. We lived in a town of 2000 (there was a Casey’s, a Dairy Queen, and a Subway and that was IT) but we always traveled to the “city” (the town of 10,000+ that had a Walmart and a McDonald’s which is the defining mark of a city in my book). Beautiful. Phenomenal.
I live in a town of 3300 (touristy, tho). We have a McD's, Taco Bell, and a crappy Burger King. Also a Hungry Howie's Pizza and a Pizza Hut in a gas station. But, because we are touristy, we have lots of other restaurants!
10,000 is a city to you? Jeez, to me that's at least 300,000. But I guess by Texas state law 10k counts as a city, I just always saw it as an extended small town. Cities are way bigger man.
@@mr_h831here I come from a city is definitely gonna be anything over a few thousand (maybe not officially). Biggest city in the county is about 4,500 people and the smallest town is just under 200. But a lot of rural housing. Granted in places like New York there are likely buildings that have more people in them than my entire county. Not complaining, I enjoy the fresh air, wildlife, and ability to stop in the middle of a street to have a conversation with someone going down the opposite lane.
@@joshk.6246 i just hate that everyone knows your business and they act nice to your face but then go home and talk crap. the smallest city i ever lived in was about 80-90k i couldn't walk down the street without seeing someone i know or go to the bar by myself and meet new people because if its busy people you know are there and if its not, nobody new is there. although for me it did have a small town feel. the bartenders knew my name and what i drink. and it is nice to have a conversation with someone you know on the street. that part i liked but i could never do anything less than 6-700k again.
NAILED IT! I look forward to the followup zoning meeting, where they say, "Y'know what we SHOULDA done..." in reference to an unforeseen problem caused by what they did, despite all the citizens warning that that's exactly what would happen.
You have a obligation to fight anyone who’s a part of a HOA board, you should tell kids not to bully each other . . . Unless their parent is a HOA member
Springtime means daffodils are popping up everywhere! But sometimes you think it's another bunch of daffodils and it's just a dollar general bag stuck in the bushes.
I grew up in a small town in PA less than 2000 people. Fairly accurate however my town wasn’t big enough for half of the stuff mentioned. We had to go 30 minutes away for nearly everything that wasn’t a local family owned store. It was a big deal when we got our first traffic light, that was about 5 years ago.
Just under 18k in my town. When I was a kid 40+ yrs ago we had 20+ stop lights. Just done a count in my head. Now we have maybe 10. 2 of those are 4 way blinking red and I have not been on that end of town in a yr or so but would not be surprised if they removed them for stop signs.
Population 5000 here. Mainly spread out farm land. I drive 30 minutes minimum to get to anything. We had our first red light about 8 year ago. I think it was so all the school buses could get out without having all stop for the stop sign. We only have 1 dollar general though it is in the next town over not sure if it would count as ours. We did get a coffee shop last year!
I grew up in a town that didn't even have a thousand people. A place nearby about the size of the town described in this video was "the city" to us. This hits *hard* as a result. 🤣
I keep forgetting when people say small towns they mean a few thousand or so. Here I am from a town of 60 people. Town I went to school in was 500 and the school itself was a consolidation of twelve different townships. Graduating class was 32 and our high school band was 5 people. We had to combine with the junior high to do anything and even then that only gave us like fifteen people maybe. (This was in Kansas btw.)
The Dollar General location planning had me in stitches. 😂They do this in the big towns too. I live in Metro Houston and there are two Dollar Generals and a Family Dollar within the same mile on the big avenue close to my house. And we live in the no HOA section 🙌🙌
It's honestly up setting how accurate this is.🙃 Because I immediately knew which Subway was the good Subway (in the strip mall by the Nice/Clean Walmart) and the weird Subway (down the highway that leads to nothing but dirt roads on the others side of town on the edge of the town border attached to the gas station everybody forgets about until they pass it by chance on the way to a get together).😶
No one is next to big lots on the other end of town where the movie theater USED to be the other is part of loves truck stop as well as the 2nd mcdonalds
my town is twas the exact opposite the good Subway was on the highway and owned by this little old lady who ran that place like a military outfit and the one in the Walmart was sketchy as hell. then the old lady retired and sold to the guy who owns the sketchy one and now they are both bad
Our bad subway is by the Walmart . When I was listing ingredients for my sub I said tomatoes where the guy proceeded to place one slice , paper thin on it and looked at me like I was trying to rip him off .
My Mississippi town is around 12-13000. Got a Walmart, 2 Family Dollars, 4 Dollar Generals, a Dollar Tree, 2 Mexican restaurants, 2 Chinese restaurants, every national phone brand store, and HEAVY on the nice neighborhoods having the best roads while everyone else suffers
When I was working close to "downtown" of my small town, I realized we have so many friggin chicken places and decided to count. 12!! We have 12 chicken places within like a 3 mile radius. (Specifically: Zaxby's, Slim Chickens, Church's, Popeye's, Chicken Express, KFC, Raising Canes, Wingstop, Buffalo Wild Wings, Twisted Tenders and 2 Chick-fil-A's)
0:20 The thing about the area around where the mayor and such live is scarily accurate. Our town has been plagued by a ton of warehouse development recently. The mayor didn't do a darn thing to stop any of it until they started trying to build near where he lives.
I once lived in a town that had more horses than people. There was an IGA, and a Michaels crafts. And a pond where everyone went in the summer and ended up with eye infections and ear infections due to the high bacterial content. Nice town.
The “good subway” joke really got me. I’m from one of these towns, and this is perfectly accurate. It’s amazing that all of the HOA jokes were on point. Also, no, no one says that they’re from my hometown, while away. We were literally voted “The most boring town in PA.”
13,000 people may sound like a lot; but remember, almost by definition, this is the county seat he's describing. So almost *everyone* out in the county is "from there," even if that Walmart's a half-hour drive down from the back roads where they live.
Oh, dear. The county seat for the county I grew up in was population 2800 in its heyday. We didn't have any of the chains for decades but then about 25 years ago, they finally got a McDonalds.
OK this hits a little too close to home... literally. I feel like you just described my town exactly. Right down to the mattress stores and the rumors about a movie theater.
I moved to a small town in downstate Illinois a little less than 2 years ago from Cleveland, Ohio. And from an outsider's point of veiw you've hit it right on the head.
Growing up in a town of 2580 people I remember the excitement of getting our first stop & go light, then our minds completely melted when the "new" gas station got built with a McDonalds attached to it...FYI, we have two stop & go lights now!
I think my town recently graduated from "small town" to "less smaller town", they gave us a second taco bell - to go with our second McDonalds and Wendy's. All within 1 mile of highway.
Well done, Matt. FWIW, a town just to the south of where I live has a Target, a Walmart and a Dollar General and also had one of the last Kmarts in our area....
Funnily enough Dollar General bought a TON of the surplus Kmart materiel near 2001. The DG I worked at for a minute in '22 still used a 30 year old Kmart cash register computer. The "BIG" upgrade refit just added a useless touchscreen to the ms-dos interface. It could beep if touched though 🤣. I recognized the shelves in that DG were also Kmart surplus too.
Our Kmart is now an indoor storage place so the place we used to go buy all the stuff we didn't really need is now the place we store all that stuff we didn't really need because God forbid we actually get rid of it 😂
My small town had a movie theater that had normal movies but somehow got away with insane ticket prices. Like 5$ for an adult. Even the concessions were reasonably priced. I still have no idea how they do it. I haven't been back in like 5 or 6 years, but it is pretty much the best thing about that town.
Yeah, I live in Cincinnati, Ohio. And in Lebanon, a country town on the outskirts of the city (or the circling highway- 275) has this rinky-dink movie theater I'm not sure is even open after the pandemic. Cheaper prices but everything looks like it's sticky.
It's called a sub-run theater. They play movies about 2 or 3 months after they've been out in the major theaters. My first job was at a sub-run and it was packed like can of sardines *ALL THE TIME*
@@7F0X7 You mean like a dollar theater? No that isn't what I'm talking about. My tiny ass theater had the big movies, the day they came out. It only had like 8 screens, but it had the newest movies.
Where I used to live in a market town in North Yorkshire (UK) we were not allowed to have a MacDonald’s or a Pizza Hut because our local council said they would generate too much empty takeaway cartons left in the street. But in the Market Square alone there were 3 Chinese takeaways, 3 chip shops and 2 pizza express!!! No joking. This video is so spot on 😆
Thanks to direct British Imports (T.V. shows), I at least am familiar with "most" British slang or shorthand words. So it didn't take me long to realize "chip shop" is short for Fish-n-chips? Which I thought were sold in vendor carts (like food trucks but smaller). So that's interesting. Non-related, I'm watching Lockwood and "ko" 😆 (I guess we "yanks" only say the word in full) and have to leave the subtitles on just to understand what anyone is saying. Thankfully, no one on that show speaks cockney or I would be spending the whole time reading the subtitles.
@@jonathancook7616 yeah chip shop or chippy is takeaway fried food, often not limited to fish and chips. I've never seen a food cart here ( like the NYC hot dog cart? Nope) but I live in a pretty windy area. Closest would be small vans that do coffee. And there's plenty of "&co" in the US! It's in the name of some stores, etc.
I have seen a Dollar General next door to a Dollar Tree. While every other business seems to constantly close down and get replaced, those two stores have never changed.
True storey here - my small town had zero matress stores. Then, the Blockbuster closed. The building was eventually purchased, renovated, and became a mattress shop. One year later, a new strip malll was built across the street and down a block. In addition to the Little Cesars, there is a mattress store. My teenaged daughter claims that these mattress stores launder money for the mob :)🤣
LMAO! You left out the junk yard and a mom and pop Ace Hardware. Also, if this town is in a wet county, there should be no less than 6 liquor stores and at least 3 bars (to include at least 1 sports bar), but none of them can be near the "nice" neighborhoods with HOAs. There also needs to be a random chain restaurant that isn't in any of the other small towns in the state, like a Huddle House, Dairy Queen, or a Crystal Burger. You also need to include a nearby state park with a small man-made lake just outside of the town limits where the kids go to smoke pot and make out. There could also be a small "Industrial Center" that has a trailer or flat-bottom boat manufacturer, and a rubber plant or chemical plant. The high school should be dominated by the over-sized football stadium, and the high school mascot should be a common mascot (tigers, wildcats, bulldogs, etc.) OR a ridiculous and unique mascot (hillbillies, woodpeckers, goat herders, etc.). The county courthouse should be the largest building in town, and there should be a bronze statue of a Civil War Confederate soldier on the courthouse lawn right next to a plaque of the town founding father. The town park is next to the courthouse, and includes two swing sets, a jungle gym, a basketball court, a softball diamond, a baseball diamond, and a walking trail that is only about half a mile long and just winds its way through a small grove of trees where the "goth kids" go to do drugs, dabble in dark magic, and talk about how terrible their lives are.
Pretty much nailed it, except everyone buys their liquor at the supermarket, mascot is real unique (bulldogs) it's a union soldier (put up at the bicentennial), we have some pizza joint that is apparently a chain in the next state over, and the park is down by the school. Also, you forgot the open air pool that has a diving board that is just the wrong height/length for any type of diving, and the drive-through bank stand that nobody ever seems to use...
The kids gathering around a jacked up Pickup in the large parking lot is so on point! See it in this 15,000 town (and county seat no less) in the edges of the Walmart parking lot.
As a kid, and that was many moons ago, we lived in a town with a population of about 5000. Clearly it was a town where people liked their alcohol. Northern Wisconsin. There were six bars all spaced out along the Main Street- each of them catered to a specific age and group of people- and none of them ever seemed empty, especially on the weekends- There were 3 mom/ pop greasy spoon diners ( yummmy food)- On each end of the town there was a restaurant/ bar combo ( my parents called them dinner clubs)😁- We had one pizza/ sub place- A ice cream/burger place where the kids hung out a lot😄 There were 7 different churches- 2 small grocers- A co-op ( Menards type store)- A dime store- hardware store- A hospital and 2 nursing homes- We had to drive 30 miles to the city for all that we couldn’t get in town- Every 2-3 months, we would take a family trip to the “city”😂 it was such a big deal for us kids. Loading up in the station wagon and heading to the city.😁We thought we were so adventurous and fancy when we ate at Chi-Chi’s, Ponderosa Steakhouse, or Old Country Buffet😂 sadly, I couldn’t wait to get away from that small town, and I ran to the big big city and now in my much older age. I would love to be back in that small town.
I am currently visiting Tallassee, AL - which seems substandard to this parody of small towns in Alabama. It does have a Hunt Brothers, a Little Caesers (not in a strip) and a Pizza Hut (not a shaped building). It has what's rumored to be the smallest and worst Walmart in the southeast if not the whole country - imagine a slightly bigger Neighborhood Market but made out like a Supercenter. This city JUST got a Taco Bell and has only one Subway. It has two Mexican restaurants - but one Mexican restaurant is in a strip. There is also another Chinese restaurant in a strip, but it might be one of the - if not the worst I've ever been to that did not have visible vermin. A localized loan place - not Loanmax or Titlemax. No mattress stores. But, get this, two, and only two Dollar Generals spaced pretty decently from each other. The population is only 4,700 - far from 13,000. Just sadness.
I live in one with 4,912 as of 2022 census lol I FEEL your pain. It's worse cuz I spent over a decade in Huntsville, AL, 2 years in the Bay area of CA, then 4 years in Nashville before coming here 😭
You have a legacy store. These are stores Sam Walton set up and no matter how much corporate wants to shut them down, for some reason they can't. So every 4 or 5 years they do a open store remodel and move stuff where no one can find it during the remodel then move it all back afterward.
Yeahhh, apparently my town is considered tiny based on these standards lol because 13,000 is huge. Our food options are Sonic, Subway, Simple Simon’s pizza, or a few local family-owned places. To get anything else, we have to drive to another county lol.
It gets worse if your a small formerly large college town on it's way out. You already had a population that was a core of 13k or less throughout the year but Always dealing with fluctuating pop. numbers from the college students coming in or leaving during the semesters and turning into a ghost town during the summer!
Same. My town is the "big hub" of our valley and it's only 4.5k. No Walmart, no dollar general, no mattress store. It does have like 3 different construction supply stores, without a single one being home depot or lowes.
@@ramennight sounds like my grandmother’s home town. One of the bars at least serves decent food, otherwise there’s a dubious Chinese place that we’ve never gone to and I’m not even sure I’ve seen open. It’s the kind of town where you kinda suspect half the businesses are just money laundering for the meth dealers.
@@Justanotherconsumer Fun fact, we are on one of the main drug and trafficking highways in the US! One time drugs and a pistol were found stashed in the old folks home. Fun times. We do have some things since the valley has several 10s of thousands of people, but its certainly far far smaller than this videos "small" town. For chain stores we ahve an Ace, McDonalds, dairy queen, papa murphies, dominoes, wallgreens, some appliance store, a couple vehicle repair chain stores....I think thats it for chain stores.
This is so spot on, and I thought only I noticed these things. My kids tell me the matress stores are fronts. I'm not sure for what, but it makes sense.
Yes, my small town in East TN has no less than 6 discount tobacco shops within a mile and a half-one a former Skinner’s dairy drive through, and another a former small bank w drive-through. Probably need to plug an urgent care center into small town plans as well.
Subscribe or eat at the bad Subway
My bad Subway (ironically closer to the interstate) went out of business while the good one still thrives 😂
Well its either the bad subway or go to the town next door to jersey mikes
And get food poisoning.
Lmaooo you need your own Netflix series 😆
This was scarily accurate.
When I lived in Texas, the locals assured me that all you need to start a town is to build a Dairy Queen, then the town magically pops up around it.
They're currently building a Dairy Queen in my town! Seeing as we're over 20,000 population wise, I think it's about time.
Then, once the town population grows a bit, that Dairy Queen will go out of business, and the building will be taken over by the most amazing family operated Mexican restaurant, or an independent pizza shop, which never seems to expand or gather much attention from anyone outside of their town and maybe one or two neighboring towns.
@@Cyber-Riot
The town I grew up in had a Dairy Queen. It was dirty as hell. It went out of business. Then it got bought by KFC. Which was dirty as hell. It went out of business. Then that building got bought by Taco Casa, stripped to the bone, cleaned more than I have ever seen a company clean something and rebuilt on the inside for Taco Casa. It stands to this day and last time I visited, the inside was still immaculate.
That or Sonic
Our town has council that definatly does not want our small town to grow. For the longest time there was only Dairy Queen but now we have Jack's. Trickle a couple of Dollar Generals and mom and pop restaurants and stores and banks. No movie theater or bowling alley. Nothin'.
You forgot to add 30 churches, including a handful that are in really random locations, like an old supermarket, or the office space next to the DMV.
#truth and don't forget some that have really strange names for churches (fill in the blank with your favorite "mega-church" style church).
My favorite is the one that is only still on the location because it's a superfund site and no actual business is willing to pay any money to purchase it and clean it up, even though it would otherwise be worth millions of dollars because it's right off the interstate exit.
How about in an old Ace Hardware building? That's what happened where I live.
And somehow they’re all called the First such-n-such.
Just once I’d like to see the Second Church of God
If the city i's in Wisconsin, your going to need to match that with bars and through in at least 2 micro breweries.
"No movie theatre?!"
"No, but there will always rumors"
This is too accurate 😂
My town still has a theater. I can relate to the... There will always be rumors because I see this as our future. I am worried it won't be there much longer...
I grew up with rumors of a Bob Evans going in (because the county was dry, no hope for an Applebees).
My town had a theater, and then it didn't because of local politics.
And then there were rumors it's come back.
And then they stopped when they realized the guy didn't have any interest in a town that basically has government that hates him.
XD
My town as a 1950s movie theater. Keeps closing down and reopening as the owners give up and new ones try to make it work. Needs renovation badly as the seats are still the original velvet and last time I was in there the crying room was being used for storage.
"A mattress store that nobody has EVER seen a customer go in"! 😂
100% accurate!
You're the Best Matt!!!
So true! My town has one and every single time I go inside there's no one there other than the owner. A former LEO family member told me why he thought businesses like this stay open but it's not legal 😮.
Before that store opened, someone else opened a "second hand mattress and furniture store." It stayed open for around a year or two. I never saw anyone go inside.
Suddenly I’m suspicious of the one in my town now. 😂😂
We all know they are just a front for some criminal trying to wash money. And its ok because the mattresses are always on sale
That comment about the mattress sure is totally realistic. So realistic that ours ended up closing for lack of customers.
I dunno what they sell, but it sure ain't mattresses.
If you were also curious what town they had on the map, it’s Jasper, Alabama. And by the looks of it, they do have 15 Dollar Generals within 15 minutes of the city center
This must be only in the US lol
Lol yep
@Kewlausgirl nope just every state south of Virginia lol
"city center" you mean walmart?
@@slim6088that’s in the US…
I live in an unincorporated town in North Alabama and Matt was pretty spot on in describing our community. We recently had Wendy's move in and they have had a full parking lot with a line of cars wrapped around the building since opening day. I never thought I'd see people so excited about Wendy's for so long. I keep waiting for the fever to break. The new strip mall included a mattress store to go along with the mattress store we already had at the other strip mall. I've never seen a human soul enter either location. I believe they are used by the FBI to place families in Witness Protection.
The neighboring town's mystery mattress store turns temporarily into a fireworks store every June. I don't think I've seen anybody go in then either lol.
My "small town" (Harrison, AR) just had a Popeye's open up a couple weeks ago in an outlot at the strip mall with the theater and the TSC and Big Lots. There was a LINE around the building and out into the turn lane into the parking lot all day every day for a week solid. If you wanted in the lot, you had to use the entrance/exit at the other end! God forbid you want to use the laundromat up the little hill behind the TSC, because you couldn't get in there. That line took you an HOUR to get through to get chicken!
Hey I from here as well. Can’t believe all the cotton fields that my friends and I used to play in are gone….and I’m only 23. That is how fast we have exploded. I know they will incorporate soon and we probably need it, but it’ll be a sad day.
😂...😐...🤔
That small town wouldn't happen to be in or near Madison County, would it?
This is too relatable and therefore painful.
The chamber of commerce in my town thought a movie theater would corrupt the youth, so replaced it with; nothing. So they all joined gangs and started smoking weed for want of something to do.
Good job, Chamber!
This is exactly the reason why I don’t like being in a place less than 50,000 people at least in a place that’s at least that big you can have a Target js
The movie theaters are dying, a really nice skate park and some ball fields are better for kids than anything. Their gang could be what team they play on instead.
@@stephenhancock1578what about the teens? What are they gonna do?
@@CoasterMan13Official Got mine in softball, airsoft, and youngest I take hiking with me.
gangs in a small town that took away the movie theater? lmao. gotta call bs on this comment. Sounds like a comment made up for likes. Unless it was something like the john deeres vs the kubotas or something....
I about choked to death when he said Hardee’s was the senior center.
That was too true! I nearly choked on my breakfast!
As a physical therapist, one of the goals for our patients has to be directly from the patient. I had the sweetest elderly man tell me he wanted to get back to his ROMEO group that met for breakfast at the Hardee's. ROMEO, you ask? Retired Old Men Eating Out!
Fun fact the place where I live used to have a Hardee’s before it was replaced with McDonald’s
@@JoyMDors86 sad show of the times. Hardy’s is the last stand of food places that serve gravy
I once passed through a small town that had one Italian restaurant as the sole restaurant in town and they had a sign in the window announcing that they now served Mexican food.
Lived in a town of ~14,000 people. There were 3 mattress stores within 4 blocks of each other. Not a single person I ever talked to in 6 years ever bought a mattress from any of them. It has to be a front of some kind.
They're always a front of some kind!
Worst is, you'll be driving my and they have that dingy looking buntin' up with a 'Under New Management' sign up!
Yep, the mod boss probably got arrested and there's a new one on the throne of underground mattress-owned mafias.
Well everyone knows, "you should get a new mattress every 8 years"
You simply hadn't lived there long enough, another 2 years and *everyone* would have gone to one of them stores 😅
Let's get to the bottom of this. "mattress king" my a$$
I was simultaneously disturbed and impressed by how accurately this man described my town. Never stop making videos, Matt!
Same!!!!
Nailed it.
It was the “Pizza Hut shaped building.” “Title Max?” So real. So funny. So sad.
@@diamondjim7560literally Cullman, AL before they tore the old building down.
We just aren't Target people. We're the Walmart people that go to Target once in a blue moon and gaze in awe at the fancy people stuff while the fancy people stare in horror at us.
I just get fascinated by the shopping carts made by Little Tykes. Remember those old hard plastic toys?
Actually, Target tends to be cheaper than Walmart. Target isn’t “higher class” it’s just objectively better.
TRUTH!
Things change all the time but unironically. Walmart's innovation was building outside of cities to reduce location cost, and using their size to bully companies into giving them products for cheaper, including selling under cost and making it back on other products. For instance almost every laptop at Walmart has downgraded RAM or something (like Dell will make LP-1 for its website and LP-1-WM for Walmart) and they're really using the cut-rate laptop to sucker you into buying groceries there, or whatever. Target's innovation was intentionally buildings its stores in the maximally inconvenient way, for instance they might put plates on the exact opposite end of the store from grocery making the customer walk more and therefore impulse buy more.
So you might go to Walmart because they have an insanely cheap TV (which has a downgraded backlight compared the "real" model direct from the company, and they hope you buy groceries on the way out to make back their margin). But at Target, you probably always go to the opposite ends of the store all the time, like if office supplies are to the left maybe grocery is on the right.
That's how each store tries to get you in different ways.
Straight facts. We don’t even have a super Walmart, just a regular one lol
I was most of the way through thinking “no Dollar General joke?” and then, bam! Never disappointed because it never gets old
I was thinking the same thing 😂
had I read your comment 2 years ago I wouldn't even know what a dollar General store was. then I moved to a small town in the south. 24 stores near where I am. tons of churches too. Catholic church is even located within walking distance of the biggest bar in town (not surprised by this one tho)
You just perfectly described the community where I live. I'm in one of the neighborhoods with an HOA and we used to hold our annual meetings at the local library. After a few heated "discussions", they required us to have a sheriff's deputy in attendance to "keep the peace". 😄😄😄
Fuck hoas, we are in America not china
Will be having a community officer at out next HOA so board member Kitty is safe from face smacking' residents who oppose ⛺️ termite mitigation 🤦🏼♀️
I remember visiting a small town with less than 800 people and realizing they had a Family Dollar, Dollar Tree and General Dollar all within walking distance of each other and somehow all these stores seemed new construction, well stocked and busy with shoppers.
Well I'm jealous! We have maybe 800 in our sleepy little town. All we have is a DG and it's only been here 8 years. We don't even have a traffic light! I would love to have a grocery store. I've heard that people don't want one. It would change the town too much. I understand all that but it would be nice not to have to drive 30-46 minutes to a Walmart or Dillons.
I used to live in an area that had a certain brand of supermarket, and that exact *same* brand of supermarket, RIGHT NEXT DOOR. both about same age & quality.
Yep. I live there too, in anywhere rural USofA! 🤣
@@lilithbrantley4930 we don't have a stop light either! But we did get a Dollar General a few years ago. I'm never going in, though. The ladies at Grace Thrift are just too darn sweet.
Does that happen to be Valley Head, AL? Otherwise, that little town is not unique in that fantastic conglomeration of stores
I lost it at "pizza hut shaped building" OMG TOO TRUE
Yes, ours used to be a Pizza hut, and now it is a locally-owned "Italian" restaurant that makes Chef-Boyardee look like haute cuisine.
Ours was a Pizza Hut before it became a Carl's Jr...before it became a vacant building. You can still see the evidence of both failed businesses on the outside, which just makes it extra sad.
@@TheCharleseye Even the giant food chains were hurting over the last couple of years. Lots of places, particularly locally-owned restaurants, went out of business due to the draconian COVID lockdowns.
@@asdisskagen6487 This happened more than ten years ago.
Not just a mattress store, but an entire furniture store. You also need a couple of other suspicious-looking shops, like a used appliance store and maybe an herb shop/homeopathy store.
Oh! And aside from the major chain restaurants, you need at least two locally-owned diners. One has to be the "good" diner and the other the "bad" diner. The good diner has friendly folks and the food is excellent. The bad diner has rude folks and tastes like prison leftovers.
And you can't forget the Waffle House.
Waffle House is just assumed, like the Fire Department, or that factory building that's been closed for 50-100 years. How else would FEMA know how bad a natural disaster is without the Waffle House disaster scale?
Grew up rural small town. We didn't have a waffle house. Still don't. There is one diner in the city over.they have always had a pizza hut and a Walmart.
@@goldiefataleDid you have a Huddle House, like me?
bad diner shows up first on google maps for out of towners
Don't forget a ratty looking bbq restaurant.
This is so accurate, especially Hardees being the senior center and teenagers standing around in a parking lot after school.
My wife & I watched this at the same time … and we both said “dollar generals” right before you said it. It’s THAT true.
What we had never thought about - that is also VERY true - is the mattress stores with no customers. (My 14yo would call those “sus.”)
Lol. This is so true. You can't forget the Dollar General, Dollar Tree, Family Dollar, and etc. I love this channel.
And the all important Dollar Dollar
Bonus if they're close enough to see each other from the front door.
…especially when they are 2 blocks from each other..😳
In Cassopolis, MI there's a spot where Dollar General and Dollar Tree are each 1/2 of a building.
How about putting in a 99 cent store for the budget minded?
we have 2 of those 3...but 2 Zaxbys 2 McDonalds 2 BK and 2 Subways
I once saw a daycare that was in a "Pizza Hut shaped building".
Love it whenever I spot a business that used to be a Pizza Hut or a Taco Bell.
We have a funeral home in a former pizza hut store.
My hometown has an old KFC that's now a bond office.
Just saw the a new church in town…it’s in the old BBQ restaurant…..seriously come for the message ..stay for the coleslaw…
I used to hang out in a dive bar in one
As a person from a small town that exploded to a big town in my lifetime... this is accurate. Lack of planning means it takes 45 minutes to get across town. .. but on the plus side, when I say where I'm from, I can now say the actual name instead of the next big city!
Nashville? Huntsville? Lexington? Tallahassee? I'm curious now lol
Need to know this place.
My town also went from not even on the map to being a city in my lifetime, and I can confirm that the road design has not improved. They're better maintained now though. Got lines on 'em and everything.
So what part of Florida are you from, lol
@@munky9808You hit waayyyy too close to home with that...which IS in Florida. The part of Florida that doesn't have Orlando, Tampa, West Palm, etc nearby.
From a small town, moved to Tucson, I’m laughing so hard!! The “good” subway and having other towns compliment you on a large store is relatable.
Don't forget the random old railroad track that hasn't seen a train in years, and the massive empty lot in the middle of town that locals say "used to be an old mansion" or "that's where the old grocery store was", or something else along those lines.
So, I moved to a small town in the country. 3 weeks ago I got a part time, evening job at the local Dollar General. I feel like I’m living through one of your sketches every shift.
Oh, you're in it for real, now!😁
You will soon realize that it is a law in Alabama that at least 6 full carts must block the isles of every Dollar General store .
@@eaglerider1826 maine too.
Amazed that 13,000 people indicates a "small" town. That's twice as many people that live in my entire county.
Yeah, it sounded like he was describing the larger town nearby that everyone means when they say they're "going into town"
@@Crym123 That is the exact town I was thinking of as he described it!
I am from a county like this. Like 7,000 people and only 3 families. We still own a farm there but all of us moved away after about 35 years, cause the locals look at us and go "Yall aint from around here are ya." That place is just a bit different.
That’s more people than in the county my grandmother grew up in.
I always thought a small town was under 500 people. Our county seat is about 7,000... With over 10k you don't have to combine 3 schools from 5 towns to get enough guys to play 8 man football...
I have a feeling that this is EXACTLY how Planning Commission meetings go in most towns.
This is extremely accurate lmao. The hunt's brothers comment hit close to home too. The only thing you forgot was to add a bunch of local businesses that shut down within a year, and a bunch of deserted gas stations on the corner
In our state, you also need the discount tobacco shop, the ABC (state-run store for the sale of alcohol), and a pawn shop. Oh, and a CVS/Walgreens/Rite-Aid. On a side note, I come here to read the comments as much as I do to watch Matt's hilarious content.
You must be from the Hampton roads in Virginia.
HIGHLY accurate. What about the rumor that the lot under construction is gonna be an Aldi or an Olive Garden?
Or an Applebee's here lol
We got Aldi here where he described but not been here too long
And it turns out it's just another TSC Tractor Supply, even when we JUST had one open up in the old Fred's Dollar building. Always a heartbreaker.😥
We had the Aldi's rumor for years! The empty lot finally had a car wash built on half of it and years later the Dollar Store just built a new building on the other half...
Too high class. Never will happen. Here's a Waffle House.
Bro this the most on point skit on TH-cam
Small Town America is slowly becoming the 1,000 Dollar General employees, and two tradesman for each trade to do repairs on the Dollar Generals and the employee's homes lol
I was warming up my fingers to mention the Dollar General, but you nailed it like always! Every time a DG or Mattress Firm goes up, and angel weeps in Heaven. 🙄
Hardee's being the senior center got me. We met one of my dad's friends' dad there and he mentioned that my grandfather has been eating/loitering there for months. Good times
😂😂😂 I had to pause it so I could laugh a loooong time at the Hardee’s/Senior Center comment. I lived 27 years in a very small NC Town. When we moved there in 1990 there was a Skat’s on Main St. It was bought out by Hardee’s and became, I kid you not, Hardee’s Skat Thru, then eventually a full fledged Hardee’s. Same group of senior citizens occupied the same tables from opening until mid-morning throughout the evolution.
When traveling with the kids at gradeschool age we stopped at a Hardee's west of St. Louis on I44 for breakfast. The old folks kaffeeklatsch had a bingo game going and let the kids play with them. My daughter won a Hardee's gift certificate. Nothing like a gathering of doting grandparents.
We don't have a Hardee's, we have Classic Burger and it's like you have to be 65+ to eat there. Every day it's like the old folks home sent people there on a field trip or something.
Hardees is one of the few places left that still gives free refills on coffee so it is an over 70 hangout until after 10:00 a.m.
I know exactly where that is!!! Makes me laugh every time!!
The combination strip mall and a ridiculous amount of storage centers in one place reminded me of where I lived for a while. It wasn't a small town, it was part of a city technically, but it was so sparse with so many trees, I wouldn't blame anyone for thinking it was its own thing.
The pizza hut in my home town is an HR Block now.
The " yeah, a suspicious amount" got me
How does Matt not have his own TV show? Great entertainer.
This is his own show!
Matt and Ryan George are the best comedy on YT!
For real!!
Facts
Nope, then he couldn’t do his own stuff
This is almost exactly the town I grew up next to. We lived in a town of 2000 (there was a Casey’s, a Dairy Queen, and a Subway and that was IT) but we always traveled to the “city” (the town of 10,000+ that had a Walmart and a McDonald’s which is the defining mark of a city in my book). Beautiful. Phenomenal.
I live in a town of 3300 (touristy, tho). We have a McD's, Taco Bell, and a crappy Burger King. Also a Hungry Howie's Pizza and a Pizza Hut in a gas station. But, because we are touristy, we have lots of other restaurants!
10,000 is a city to you?
Jeez, to me that's at least 300,000.
But I guess by Texas state law 10k counts as a city, I just always saw it as an extended small town.
Cities are way bigger man.
@@mr_h831here I come from a city is definitely gonna be anything over a few thousand (maybe not officially). Biggest city in the county is about 4,500 people and the smallest town is just under 200.
But a lot of rural housing. Granted in places like New York there are likely buildings that have more people in them than my entire county.
Not complaining, I enjoy the fresh air, wildlife, and ability to stop in the middle of a street to have a conversation with someone going down the opposite lane.
@@joshk.6246 i just hate that everyone knows your business and they act nice to your face but then go home and talk crap. the smallest city i ever lived in was about 80-90k i couldn't walk down the street without seeing someone i know or go to the bar by myself and meet new people because if its busy people you know are there and if its not, nobody new is there. although for me it did have a small town feel. the bartenders knew my name and what i drink. and it is nice to have a conversation with someone you know on the street. that part i liked but i could never do anything less than 6-700k again.
every small town in Iowa, I feel that 🤙
As a born-and-raised Walker County boy, I could not click this video fast enough. 100% accurate! Love it.
Have a Dad from Jasper, also what made me click on this
Omg! Living in one of those small towns, I can confirm that this is entirely spot on!
Love the channel. Thirty years delivering a rural route taught me most Southerners prefer Dodge or Ford pick-ups, tho.
NAILED IT! I look forward to the followup zoning meeting, where they say, "Y'know what we SHOULDA done..." in reference to an unforeseen problem caused by what they did, despite all the citizens warning that that's exactly what would happen.
I don’t live a small town, but the 2 Subway’s, the 2 Mattress Stores that never have anyone, the strip malls, and the HOA part are all so accurate lol
You have a obligation to fight anyone who’s a part of a HOA board, you should tell kids not to bully each other . . . Unless their parent is a HOA member
@@RomanvonUngernSternbergnrmfvus And that's just if you DON'T live in an HOA.
Springtime means daffodils are popping up everywhere! But sometimes you think it's another bunch of daffodils and it's just a dollar general bag stuck in the bushes.
I grew up in a small town in PA less than 2000 people. Fairly accurate however my town wasn’t big enough for half of the stuff mentioned. We had to go 30 minutes away for nearly everything that wasn’t a local family owned store. It was a big deal when we got our first traffic light, that was about 5 years ago.
That’s pretty awesome actually.
Just under 18k in my town. When I was a kid 40+ yrs ago we had 20+ stop lights. Just done a count in my head. Now we have maybe 10. 2 of those are 4 way blinking red and I have not been on that end of town in a yr or so but would not be surprised if they removed them for stop signs.
Population 5000 here. Mainly spread out farm land. I drive 30 minutes minimum to get to anything. We had our first red light about 8 year ago. I think it was so all the school buses could get out without having all stop for the stop sign. We only have 1 dollar general though it is in the next town over not sure if it would count as ours. We did get a coffee shop last year!
Name of your town? I am curious now
We still don't have a traffic light.
I grew up in a town that didn't even have a thousand people. A place nearby about the size of the town described in this video was "the city" to us.
This hits *hard* as a result. 🤣
I keep forgetting when people say small towns they mean a few thousand or so. Here I am from a town of 60 people. Town I went to school in was 500 and the school itself was a consolidation of twelve different townships. Graduating class was 32 and our high school band was 5 people. We had to combine with the junior high to do anything and even then that only gave us like fifteen people maybe. (This was in Kansas btw.)
Well yeah, they said town not village.
That’s not a small town, that’s a big family.
I believe any settlement between 15-100 people is called a hamlet
Where at in Kansas? I’m from Lincoln. Population 1,100. I understand those struggles😂
The town I used to live in in Maine had 27 people, and ten of them were my family members. The local cemetery was more populated than my town.
“Look at us… we’re not Target people.” 😂😂
You had me worried. It was almost over and I'm yelling "You forgot the Dollar Generals!!!!". Great skit!!
Matt is a fiendishly diabolical genius that should definitely hold a government position. Or at least have his own show...
Matt is too smart for government work.
What about Matt, though? I thought he was pretty good, too...
The Dollar General location planning had me in stitches. 😂They do this in the big towns too. I live in Metro Houston and there are two Dollar Generals and a Family Dollar within the same mile on the big avenue close to my house. And we live in the no HOA section 🙌🙌
Hardee's as the senior center is spot on and hilarious 😂
At least thanks to Matt and his channels we now know Hardees has the best shakes, important when we gotta gum everything 🥣
It's honestly up setting how accurate this is.🙃 Because I immediately knew which Subway was the good Subway (in the strip mall by the Nice/Clean Walmart) and the weird Subway (down the highway that leads to nothing but dirt roads on the others side of town on the edge of the town border attached to the gas station everybody forgets about until they pass it by chance on the way to a get together).😶
No one is next to big lots on the other end of town where the movie theater USED to be the other is part of loves truck stop as well as the 2nd mcdonalds
@@MCG55SS Right next to the old Walmart
@@bp-ob8ic yep....before the supercenter was built XD
my town is twas the exact opposite the good Subway was on the highway and owned by this little old lady who ran that place like a military outfit and the one in the Walmart was sketchy as hell. then the old lady retired and sold to the guy who owns the sketchy one and now they are both bad
Our bad subway is by the Walmart . When I was listing ingredients for my sub I said tomatoes where the guy proceeded to place one slice , paper thin on it and looked at me like I was trying to rip him off .
My Mississippi town is around 12-13000. Got a Walmart, 2 Family Dollars, 4 Dollar Generals, a Dollar Tree, 2 Mexican restaurants, 2 Chinese restaurants, every national phone brand store, and HEAVY on the nice neighborhoods having the best roads while everyone else suffers
When I was working close to "downtown" of my small town, I realized we have so many friggin chicken places and decided to count. 12!! We have 12 chicken places within like a 3 mile radius. (Specifically: Zaxby's, Slim Chickens, Church's, Popeye's, Chicken Express, KFC, Raising Canes, Wingstop, Buffalo Wild Wings, Twisted Tenders and 2 Chick-fil-A's)
0:20
The thing about the area around where the mayor and such live is scarily accurate. Our town has been plagued by a ton of warehouse development recently. The mayor didn't do a darn thing to stop any of it until they started trying to build near where he lives.
I once lived in a town that had more horses than people. There was an IGA, and a Michaels crafts. And a pond where everyone went in the summer and ended up with eye infections and ear infections due to the high bacterial content. Nice town.
The “good subway” joke really got me. I’m from one of these towns, and this is perfectly accurate. It’s amazing that all of the HOA jokes were on point. Also, no, no one says that they’re from my hometown, while away. We were literally voted “The most boring town in PA.”
Ah, I see you're from White Oak.
I don't even say the nearest big town, I just say what 2 state border it's on lol Arkansas and Oklahoma btw
You misspelled "state".
@@jamesa7506 I keep saying that PA is just the "Meh" state. No one really hates us.
@Queen Aqua I heard there used to be a minigolf course there, too.
The line about restaurants that everyone gets sick of - and they're all fast food - nailed it!
13,000 people may sound like a lot; but remember, almost by definition, this is the county seat he's describing.
So almost *everyone* out in the county is "from there," even if that Walmart's a half-hour drive down from the back roads where they live.
Oh, dear. The county seat for the county I grew up in was population 2800 in its heyday. We didn't have any of the chains for decades but then about 25 years ago, they finally got a McDonalds.
OK this hits a little too close to home... literally. I feel like you just described my town exactly. Right down to the mattress stores and the rumors about a movie theater.
Oh Winder Georgia. It had all of the above, and then a Belk. Bless Holly Hill Mall.
I moved to a small town in downstate Illinois a little less than 2 years ago from Cleveland, Ohio. And from an outsider's point of veiw you've hit it right on the head.
You moved from the free state of Ohio to the People's Republic of Illinois? On purpose?
Growing up in a town of 2580 people I remember the excitement of getting our first stop & go light, then our minds completely melted when the "new" gas station got built with a McDonalds attached to it...FYI, we have two stop & go lights now!
We freaked out when Taco Bell came. So exotic! 😂
I think my town recently graduated from "small town" to "less smaller town", they gave us a second taco bell - to go with our second McDonalds and Wendy's. All within 1 mile of highway.
Well done, Matt. FWIW, a town just to the south of where I live has a Target, a Walmart and a Dollar General and also had one of the last Kmarts in our area....
i can’t believe k mart still exists. they closed the one near me like 10 years ago and turned it into a walmart lol.
Funnily enough Dollar General bought a TON of the surplus Kmart materiel near 2001. The DG I worked at for a minute in '22 still used a 30 year old Kmart cash register computer. The "BIG" upgrade refit just added a useless touchscreen to the ms-dos interface. It could beep if touched though 🤣. I recognized the shelves in that DG were also Kmart surplus too.
Ohhhhh you live in one of those FANCY towns! :)
Our Kmart is now an indoor storage place so the place we used to go buy all the stuff we didn't really need is now the place we store all that stuff we didn't really need because God forbid we actually get rid of it 😂
@@matthewmccoy7437 I watch an Australian channel and they have Kmart down there! In a mall!
I think you literally just described my favorite southern town....Trenton GA. I lived there for 2 years and it was amazing.
As a person living in a town with a population of 10,000; this is very accurate.
The Pizza Hut shaped building… they haunt us. You are so spot on and are funny without being insulting. I just love you!🧡
My small town had a movie theater that had normal movies but somehow got away with insane ticket prices. Like 5$ for an adult. Even the concessions were reasonably priced. I still have no idea how they do it. I haven't been back in like 5 or 6 years, but it is pretty much the best thing about that town.
Yeah, I live in Cincinnati, Ohio. And in Lebanon, a country town on the outskirts of the city (or the circling highway- 275) has this rinky-dink movie theater I'm not sure is even open after the pandemic. Cheaper prices but everything looks like it's sticky.
@@ImNotaRussianBot is that the place where the train derailed?
It's called a sub-run theater. They play movies about 2 or 3 months after they've been out in the major theaters. My first job was at a sub-run and it was packed like can of sardines *ALL THE TIME*
@@7F0X7 You mean like a dollar theater? No that isn't what I'm talking about. My tiny ass theater had the big movies, the day they came out. It only had like 8 screens, but it had the newest movies.
@@darksean99 8 screens? That's luxury compared to the movie theatre in my small town. It only had one 🤣🤣
Where I used to live in a market town in North Yorkshire (UK) we were not allowed to have a MacDonald’s or a Pizza Hut because our local council said they would generate too much empty takeaway cartons left in the street. But in the Market Square alone there were 3 Chinese takeaways, 3 chip shops and 2 pizza express!!! No joking. This video is so spot on 😆
The reasons that councils deny things could make up several comedy skits I suspect.
And it's soooo arbitrary
Thanks to direct British Imports (T.V. shows), I at least am familiar with "most" British slang or shorthand words. So it didn't take me long to realize "chip shop" is short for Fish-n-chips? Which I thought were sold in vendor carts (like food trucks but smaller). So that's interesting. Non-related, I'm watching Lockwood and "ko" 😆 (I guess we "yanks" only say the word in full) and have to leave the subtitles on just to understand what anyone is saying. Thankfully, no one on that show speaks cockney or I would be spending the whole time reading the subtitles.
@@jonathancook7616 yeah chip shop or chippy is takeaway fried food, often not limited to fish and chips. I've never seen a food cart here ( like the NYC hot dog cart? Nope) but I live in a pretty windy area. Closest would be small vans that do coffee.
And there's plenty of "&co" in the US! It's in the name of some stores, etc.
MATT you will have a million subscribers in no time best of luck!
I have seen a Dollar General next door to a Dollar Tree. While every other business seems to constantly close down and get replaced, those two stores have never changed.
Another instant classic Matt, keep being awesome!!!
Go Dawgs!!!
Much too soon Matt, " More holes than a Pac-12 defense?" but I have to agree. 🤭
True storey here - my small town had zero matress stores. Then, the Blockbuster closed. The building was eventually purchased, renovated, and became a mattress shop. One year later, a new strip malll was built across the street and down a block. In addition to the Little Cesars, there is a mattress store. My teenaged daughter claims that these mattress stores launder money for the mob :)🤣
Everything you said in this video described Farmington, MO where I grew up. I hurt my ribs laughing so hard thank u for that
The excitement in my town was palpable when we got a Sheetz! Small town NC living is the best.
Our town has 2 Dollar Generals about one mile apart, on the same road BUT opposite sides of the road, so that makes sense 😂
Neighbor?
In Tn, Franklin County, there’s the same, but same side of the road 🤦♀️
So, apparently Matt came to my town.
Haha this was great and soo very accurate! Cheers!
This channel totally deserves at least a million subscribers! So funny!
Matt, that was funny how you placed the Dollar Generals and said, Put some more there!”
Matt, you are a genius. I love you!
I feel this on a personal level 💯 😅 I grew up in a tiny town lol.
LMAO! You left out the junk yard and a mom and pop Ace Hardware. Also, if this town is in a wet county, there should be no less than 6 liquor stores and at least 3 bars (to include at least 1 sports bar), but none of them can be near the "nice" neighborhoods with HOAs. There also needs to be a random chain restaurant that isn't in any of the other small towns in the state, like a Huddle House, Dairy Queen, or a Crystal Burger. You also need to include a nearby state park with a small man-made lake just outside of the town limits where the kids go to smoke pot and make out. There could also be a small "Industrial Center" that has a trailer or flat-bottom boat manufacturer, and a rubber plant or chemical plant. The high school should be dominated by the over-sized football stadium, and the high school mascot should be a common mascot (tigers, wildcats, bulldogs, etc.) OR a ridiculous and unique mascot (hillbillies, woodpeckers, goat herders, etc.). The county courthouse should be the largest building in town, and there should be a bronze statue of a Civil War Confederate soldier on the courthouse lawn right next to a plaque of the town founding father. The town park is next to the courthouse, and includes two swing sets, a jungle gym, a basketball court, a softball diamond, a baseball diamond, and a walking trail that is only about half a mile long and just winds its way through a small grove of trees where the "goth kids" go to do drugs, dabble in dark magic, and talk about how terrible their lives are.
Perfect
Pretty much nailed it, except everyone buys their liquor at the supermarket, mascot is real unique (bulldogs) it's a union soldier (put up at the bicentennial), we have some pizza joint that is apparently a chain in the next state over, and the park is down by the school. Also, you forgot the open air pool that has a diving board that is just the wrong height/length for any type of diving, and the drive-through bank stand that nobody ever seems to use...
Nailed it.
I think we live in the same "theoretical" town.
Courthouse is in the center of the town square. And the Western Auto, Catholic Church, Bank and a locally owned department store are around it.
I moved to California about 10 years ago. Thank you for reminding me of all the good I left.
The kids gathering around a jacked up Pickup in the large parking lot is so on point! See it in this 15,000 town (and county seat no less) in the edges of the Walmart parking lot.
As a kid, and that was many moons ago, we lived in a town with a population of about 5000. Clearly it was a town where people liked their alcohol. Northern Wisconsin. There were six bars all spaced out along the Main Street- each of them catered to a specific age and group of people- and none of them ever seemed empty, especially on the weekends-
There were 3 mom/ pop greasy spoon diners ( yummmy food)- On each end of the town there was a restaurant/ bar combo ( my parents called them dinner clubs)😁- We had one pizza/ sub place- A ice cream/burger place where the kids hung out a lot😄 There were 7 different churches- 2 small grocers- A co-op ( Menards type store)- A dime store- hardware store- A hospital and 2 nursing homes- We had to drive 30 miles to the city for all that we couldn’t get in town- Every 2-3 months, we would take a family trip to the “city”😂 it was such a big deal for us kids. Loading up in the station wagon and heading to the city.😁We thought we were so adventurous and fancy when we ate at Chi-Chi’s, Ponderosa Steakhouse, or Old Country Buffet😂 sadly, I couldn’t wait to get away from that small town, and I ran to the big big city and now in my much older age. I would love to be back in that small town.
Well said!
Being from a small town in North Georgia… this is way too accurate 😂
I am currently visiting Tallassee, AL - which seems substandard to this parody of small towns in Alabama.
It does have a Hunt Brothers, a Little Caesers (not in a strip) and a Pizza Hut (not a shaped building). It has what's rumored to be the smallest and worst Walmart in the southeast if not the whole country - imagine a slightly bigger Neighborhood Market but made out like a Supercenter. This city JUST got a Taco Bell and has only one Subway. It has two Mexican restaurants - but one Mexican restaurant is in a strip. There is also another Chinese restaurant in a strip, but it might be one of the - if not the worst I've ever been to that did not have visible vermin. A localized loan place - not Loanmax or Titlemax. No mattress stores. But, get this, two, and only two Dollar Generals spaced pretty decently from each other. The population is only 4,700 - far from 13,000.
Just sadness.
I live in one with 4,912 as of 2022 census lol I FEEL your pain. It's worse cuz I spent over a decade in Huntsville, AL, 2 years in the Bay area of CA, then 4 years in Nashville before coming here 😭
@@3arthIsGhetto I don't understand how people can live like this. I'm from Mobile, AL and this small town shit is for the birds.
@@havencirclespend 40+ years in Atlanta. There will always be people seeking small town life.
@@frzstat They can have it. I'm good.
You have a legacy store. These are stores Sam Walton set up and no matter how much corporate wants to shut them down, for some reason they can't. So every 4 or 5 years they do a open store remodel and move stuff where no one can find it during the remodel then move it all back afterward.
🤣 You sir are a GOAT storyteller!
The best part is how you added DG stores to the map. Moved from Metro Atlanta GA to small north GA town… 4 DGs in 10 mile stretch!
Yeahhh, apparently my town is considered tiny based on these standards lol because 13,000 is huge. Our food options are Sonic, Subway, Simple Simon’s pizza, or a few local family-owned places. To get anything else, we have to drive to another county lol.
It gets worse if your a small formerly large college town on it's way out. You already had a population that was a core of 13k or less throughout the year but Always dealing with fluctuating pop. numbers from the college students coming in or leaving during the semesters and turning into a ghost town during the summer!
Subway, Pizza Hut, a bar, a Mexican restaurant, an American restaurant, another American restaurant, and that’s it
Same. My town is the "big hub" of our valley and it's only 4.5k. No Walmart, no dollar general, no mattress store. It does have like 3 different construction supply stores, without a single one being home depot or lowes.
@@ramennight sounds like my grandmother’s home town.
One of the bars at least serves decent food, otherwise there’s a dubious Chinese place that we’ve never gone to and I’m not even sure I’ve seen open.
It’s the kind of town where you kinda suspect half the businesses are just money laundering for the meth dealers.
@@Justanotherconsumer Fun fact, we are on one of the main drug and trafficking highways in the US! One time drugs and a pistol were found stashed in the old folks home. Fun times.
We do have some things since the valley has several 10s of thousands of people, but its certainly far far smaller than this videos "small" town. For chain stores we ahve an Ace, McDonalds, dairy queen, papa murphies, dominoes, wallgreens, some appliance store, a couple vehicle repair chain stores....I think thats it for chain stores.
my god. you have just perfectly described Red Bank, South Carolina. Holy crap.
This is so spot on, and I thought only I noticed these things. My kids tell me the matress stores are fronts. I'm not sure for what, but it makes sense.
Yes, my small town in East TN has no less than 6 discount tobacco shops within a mile and a half-one a former Skinner’s dairy drive through, and another a former small bank w drive-through. Probably need to plug an urgent care center into small town plans as well.
I am from Walker Co. you were depicting. I have to say, spot on. True y'all.
You forgot about that one restaurant that the town is praised for