I think the man is narsissist and the women is codependent and It's a rattling mixture. not everyone can be in a relationship with a person with mental issues. Divorce is the best option for kid's happiness.
The last story, the woman thinks her husband “turned into a monster” he didn’t. He was faking being nice before (that was his representative). And once she got pregnant she met the real him. I feel terrible for her and hope she gets as far away from him as she can. He’s a danger to her and that baby.
@@brownjadedAbsolutely. These psychos will wait as long as they need to wait in order to trap us. Especially if they can get offspring out of it. What choice does he have? He needs her womb.
It's terrifying how men can hide their true personalities for years until they think they have a woman trapped. It's hard to believe they are really human sometimes
Narcissists are renowned for ruining holidays. The husband that likes to take his wife on emotional roller coasters and nothing is ever his fault has very narcissistic tendencies. The pregnant woman whose husband moved out needs to put up cameras around the house.
Right that is such a horrible thing to go through, I really hope that she leaves him and pull herself together and take care of her kids and herself….❤
Casual sex rejection! Tell him no, and I promise you he will always come back until you say yes. I’m 47 years old and there are men in my DMs from high school that I turned down for sex still trynna get it. Men need to hear no sometimes, it helps them grow.
Yes, it’s probably partly a self-esteem thing and over valuing men’s approval. A man’s rejection shouldn’t never so much that you have disappointing sex. If he does disappear when he hears no, that’s a good thing. Shows that’s all he was after anyway
Casual s8x for some if not most women is just a waste of time & an unnecessary risk to take. Even s8x within a "committed relationship" with males can be just as risky and dangerous (and still not satisfying). Why do it?
Six months. He waited till she couldn't safely terminate. This is why I'm an advocate for lying about your due date and feeding false info like you can't terminate after four months. If they act up as soon as they think you can't back out, yeet.
Men like to say "the juice is not worth the squeeze". After reading all of this I can say "the Salami is never worth the bologna that will be brought into your life." Single, celibate, & childfree = safe, sane, & financially solvent.
Second story: yup he's a narc.😢 My abusive ex Narc did these _very_ things. Start fights with his complaining and bad mood, getting angry when I'd cry, calling my emotions and "inconvenience" for him, no empathy whatsoever, over all a monster who wanted to drag me into the hell that is his mind and soul. Run, girl. Run fast!! He will kill you and your light with this co start treatment. 😢
Me too. He's 100% a narcissist. My narc does the same exact things I mean I can't even count how many times I've cried the way she describes. In public but you can't cry out loud or the narc will get mad. They want to keep up appearances in public and then once you're alone they don't care how they act.
I definitely see lots of BPD, borderline more than narcissism. But def see narcissistic tendencies too. Hot and cold, push and pull, out of control emotions, possible lack of sense of self (acting like a rich snob out of nowhere). I am more familiar with BPD so it is easier to see for me. Interesting to hear your perspectives!
Yea the no emotions strikes me as Antisocial PD which is often comorbid with NPD. But regardless of possible diagnosis (which he probably will not get anyways, esp if Narcissism or Antisocial is his main issue) dude is toxic AF and would need lots of help and hard work to get better(and may not be capable of change at all).
I am terrified for that last lady. It’s not over, he can follow her from work or the hospital to her new place. I hope she takes more steps to prepare for the worst: weapons, etc. she should let her new neighbors know so they can keep their eyes peeled for suspicious activity, him or his car etc. this is a dangerous one
That last story has me ugly crying. Thank you for the opportunity to look some of my grief in the face! Almost a decade post divorce and I am still dealing with that “no man will want a single mom”. It’s been true for me, sadly. It’s good to cry it out and process the hurt even this many years later.
You’re probably better off single anyways.🤷🏽♀️ These dudes don’t add any value to a relationship, they just want to drain your energy. Any man worth your time will accept you just the way you are. Don’t feel bad about being single. It’s Gods protection! You’re not missing out on anything.
First story naw that deadbeat cannot use the grand baby as a do over as a grandfather when he failed to properly parent and care for the OP and her siblings. Her mother did all the work has the audacity to criticize her. He’s struggling because he’s a king baby with no wife. He’s out of line period! He needs to dominate and control his emotions and life. Not hers! She can have five naninies it’s not his business! She’s not the AH. Second story she needs to file for divorce now! He just wants to dominate and control her. She needs permission to exist it’s pure bs! She needs to divorce now. He’s evil and abusive and will never change! He’s a typical Narc. This marriage is a prison period! She’s not the AH!
It’s really sad that you can’t be vulnerable with men! Many really do use your trauma against you. Relationships with most men are like eating a struggle meal. Sad and unfulfilling. You almost rather go hungry. Not like it’s nourishing or anything…
The second story, that man is a narcissist. The medication she speaks of will never work. There is no magic pill for a personality disorder. It will never get better. She is being abused and needs to leave as soon as is humanly possible. The last story is a narcissist also. They can be whomever they need to be for as long as they need to be until they think you are trapped. You can't vet. There is no way to vet this kind of thing. The only thing you can do is know your worth, pack your feelings away, and be okay with leaving.
Second story with the lady crying at dinner, this guy hates her. He got the kids he wanted out of her, he's done with her, but probably doesn't want to have to pay child support, so he tolerates keeping her around but entertains himself by being abusive and cruel to her. Wow. Yeah she should move on. It'll be hard with three young kids, though.
2nd story… omg, some of these “husbands” are so insufferable 😩😩 what’s the point of being married to someone like that?? Ppl tell me I’m too picky, but idc. I’d rather be picky than settle for someone who is constantly in conflict with me and constantly causing me misery. I refuse to believe men like him become that way overnight.
Second story: sounds like he is conditioning her to never want to go out on dates... But he doesn’t want it to look like he doesnt want to take her out. So he insists on them going out (to save face) but then ruins every outing (so that she will refuse to go out with him in the future). I bet that he will complain to friends and family about how she never wants to go out anymore and how he is the only one trying to keep the spark alive, blah blah blah. It will look like she shares some of the blame when he eventually cheats. He does sound narcissistic. Wanting to have the appearance of goodness without actually being good. She she should run before she loses herself and or her mind.
I was thinking the same. He makes dates so awful she never even asks to go out again. Same with the marriage workbook. Starts a fight so he never has to face any real issues in the marriage and actually try to FIX them. He likes a miserable marriage, enough to make sure it stays that way
S2- she married a narcissist. It’s a classic move for narcissists to want to pretend to be grander than they are and when she didn’t play along it pissed him off. It’s weird the way she’s acting as if she doesn’t realize that part. It’s also classic Narc behavior to ruin special events. The random anger and mood swings is also a part of their playbook. He gets off on controlling her and if she doesn’t behave in the way he wants she’s punished by his anger and coldness. They don’t feel empathy. Therapy will do nothing to save this marriage. I just feel sad for her that she’s had so many children with him and won’t be able to truly get him out of her life anytime soon.
Im not even married to that man and i want a divorce. I hate this. People shouldnt be crying over their mean spouses! They should have spouses that support them and are kind.
I feel exhausted for the second woman. She has put up with a lot in what is clearly an abusive relationship. She needs to stop trying so hard and leave so that she doesn’t normalize his emotional and verbal abuse for the kids. I wish her the best.
Hmmmm. The reasons for getting together with regular men are dwindling. 😅 Who would want to be with someone who you can’t open up to? Dating is getting immensely rough.
It always was rough. It's just that women aren't taking that bs anymore, lol! It's been a long time coming, but yeah, we've finally accepted that the juice is indeed not worth the squeeze!
The 2nd story, the husband’s cheating. It’s typical for men having an affair to become mean to their spouse. The wife should look into getting a divorce. The guy’s an a-hole. He tied her down with kids and now using her as a punching bag.
But it WAS already mean before she got together with it. It just hid it under a joke. Here’s the thing I’ve realized that these zYX are more parasite that human. It means basically 4 things. 1. They CANNOT even like you, you are their prey. A predator CANNOT like it’s prey. CANNOT 2. They defiantly CANNOT love you. You are two different species. Hello!!! Love is not possible be two different species. Love men feel is more line extreme satisfaction all their needs are being met. 3. It also means once they feel they’ve used you up to you max, thry are literally disgusted by you. It’s like maggots in a dead body. New maggots will prefer new dead bodies, yes? It’s like a tooth brush. Once a tooth brush is used up, you want a new one and discard the old one. That men’s they are looking for an exit. And am exist looks like…this. It could also look like he needs her bc he doesn’t have a new situation yet so he’s ready to go, but he’s not ready to go. Get it? The exist could also be he would stay with her for life but has no problem losing her. Or even an exit coukd look like cheating where you’re still using the woman but you’re acting single in the world. He’s in one of those situations. Something tells me he’s looking for his next nookie, by that dude is done with her. He said he doesn’t want
💯 Being an a-hole in general but also, he’s presented himself to his girlfriend as wealthy. He enjoys doing it up big and acting fancy at restaurants, but his wife bursts his bubble by not playing along. Not even in a mean way, just not playing rich lady (because they aren’t). Guarantee he called her when he went to the car. He might even go to that exact restaurant with the other woman and his wife is ruining his rep by being frugal. Gross guy all around.
Personally, i never wanted a random putting their hands on me. There has to be a real emotional connection and time. How can you feel comfortable, safe and special with a stranger? Id rather just get a device and use that instead of using a whole human being to scratch a temporary itch.
Right? Honestly, s3x with men is usually underwhelming anyway. Most women have to finish themselves up anyway. And honestly, I don't care if it sounds tone deaf, but most other women I know who chase casual s3x are indeed often looking for a committed partner. And they think that giving them s3X will get a man to commit. That pretty much never works out for them.
My dad, now aged 77, still remembers the bdays of all of my siblings and myself. It's true that men of that era didn't change diapers. I accept that people are products of their era. But he always found time to take us out even if it was just for ice cream with dad. He was an investment banker. He arrived home and mom was always ready to deliver happy hour to him. But he often wanted the kids with him in the parlor for that. He wanted to hear about our day. Kids only need to be shuttered away from dad upon his arrival from work if they are a source of more stress. My dad sure seems to like us and he seemed to have stress relief from us. If you don't like kids, that's cool. But you probably won't be asked to babysit. Kids don't need the expert. They need the person who wants to be with them.
I disagree, a child’s safety is more important than a grown man’s preferences and desires. If someone has proven themselves to be unknowledgeable about taking care of a baby unsupervised, and is unwilling to be taught the proper way, they are not looking out for that child’s best interests.
@@CharlieApples what that I said do you disagree with? Did you interpret what I said to mean that someone who doesn't care or learn to care about children should be allowed to watch them?
@@TheePrincessBrat- That's a power play. Don't invite him or acknowledge his anymore. If he can't remember yours then it won't make a difference if he isn't involved in it.
@@kdphotos4691 it’s weird because it started out of nowhere. My 17th birthday was the first time he did that. Maybe he stopped pretending to care because he wouldn’t be paying child support on me anymore 🧐 I don’t give him gifts or acknowledge his bday or holidays. Last Father’s Day my sister and I spent the whole day out together 🤣
The story about the couple in the restaurant.. that man is an abusive narcissist. She needs to leave.. there is no saving the marriage. She should do what she can to minimise his contact with her children because he’s going to damage them too.
"He drove the babysitter home". I bet money thats he's cheating with her. He's taking his anger out on the wife and he's rushing the dinner so he can get back to the babysitter.
Exactly what I thought too. Men who drive the babysitter home are not to be trusted. If you wanna make some money babysitting find your own ride. Or ask the wife....
Oh, I listened to the grandfather one yesterday.....barely spent any time with his kids but knows what hes doing because he raised 4. 🙄 No, he'd come home from work, eat dinner then check out.
First story - NTA. Dad is looking for a hobby and thinks caring for an infant will fill the bill. Since he.sounds rather bull-headed, I would have also asked him to change the baby's diaper (Including wiping), feeding and burping, etc.
Who on earth hires a male nanny?😂 I’ve only heard of it once, and it ended up with the male nanny making child corn with the kid. In fact, here in Houston last month, a male volunteered to watch 2 toddler boys for a coworker who was called into her job at the Galleria, and he took the boys into the bathroom, called 6 of his friends, and they gang graped these 2 boys repeatedly on film whilst berating them. That’s why it’s a no go to have a male babysitting.
The thing is, if he wasn't active in bringing up his own children, he has no idea how closely you have to look after a toddler, or how easily they can get into trouble (climbing onto counter, messing with electrical socket, pulling electrical cords, opening refrigerator, dropping a glass jar, putting small items in his mouth, ect.). He can learn, but it's not instinctive to him yet. So, he would literally need to be supervised until he becomes good at babysitting.
Second guy is a WILD. To stress out your pregnant wife is unacceptable. He wants a punching bag and he is going to unalive her through her nervous system.
This convinces me that you have to have your own money to raise your kids before having them- 'cause the husband can just turn. Like, going in to a marriage it is as almost you gotta be rich :/
That last story is stuck in my brian. Just the image of her, 6 months pregnant, trying to passively walk by him and him quietly shoving her over and over until she falls. That man has been a bully his whole life and his whole horrible self comes out when someone is at their most vulnerable. That's how all bullies are.
2nd story: He’s finding fault with her because he’s already stepping out or at least interested in someone else. He hates her because she’s holding him back (in his delusional brain). She needs to get out of the situation. Who wants to be with someone who hates them? He’s an entitled spoiled narcissist.
Not a fan of casual sex. I tried to have my “moment” after leaving the ex narc, but it just isn’t who I am. And I don’t want to exchange energy with just anybody after finally getting free.
She could have drawn the same boundary without letting him know about her trauma. Everyrhing doesn't require a detailed explanation. If that is how you prefer to date, that is what you prefer. Be selective about what you choose to share with a man you barely know.
It's gotten so bad that I don't even go into too much detail about anything in the beginning. I just observe their behavior and determine if it fits my wants / needs or whether their normal behavior regularly crosses my boundaries. Because even without knowing past trauma, some will still pretend to respect boundaries until an attachment / connection develops. Then all 🔥breaks loose.
If he can't have a normal conversation with you on date night it's not a romantic relationship anymore. Mental health may be the reason, but that doesn't mean that you have to put up with it. Please don't allow someone's mental health issues destroy you. I may sound mean, but it's not your job to help them with that.
1. NTA - She has every right to protect her child & leaving her child w/someone incompetent who thinks they're going to fly in & be super gramps when they have no real basis for it is foolish. 2. He doesn't love you & he's toxic to the children. Get rid of him.
I’m sorry her mom isn’t there to put him in his place for you. How do you have a relationship with someone who is that delusional? That’s a serious question.
Second story, yeah that's exactly what it's like to go out with a unaware narcissist. They upset you & then get upset that you're upset- but honestly I think that type wants to upset you. They use you as an emotional punching bag- I think they like to get an emotional reaction. Sometimes, no matter what you do, they're just going to be upset. Fourth story was so scary, and that dude never took accountability- he cheated & tried to blame her, and from there made things worse & worse. It's awful to think someone you trusted could turn like that... :(
@joeshmoe0136 Oh yes, they love to ruin special occasions. My bad ex told me I ruined my own birthday, for him. Then he got really mad at me for "not being happy enough" 🙃 He told me I ruined special occasions, but he was always flipping out on them trying to provoke me. It must suck to feel however they do, but it also sucks to deal with that nonsense.
2nd story - what is it with these people who get you into a position where it's hard for you to walk away and then turn into monsters. I hope the OP is OK.
Kudos to the woman who shined a light on grandad's true character. The 2nd story: that woman is living the "death by a thousand cuts" with that narc a-hole. Sad & lonely. The last story is a reminder that xys only pretend as long as it suits them and then, not content to just move on, they have to destroy their partner's mind, body and soul. As regards "casual sleeping with the enemy" did you notice how the OP said, "I feel like I HAVE TO put out," and later "b) I really am SO AFRAID of their reaction if I don't do it...". Most women won't acknowledge how much they fear men even tho there are millions of examples why we should. They show us every day. We're not allowed to say no, and when we do? well, "No means yes" is what we're told. XYs are a threat to women. She will just comply & pass on bodily autonomy without being told to. This is true for many women.
It’s not uncommon for first instances of physical abuse to start during pregnancy or shortly after. It’s very sad. She needs to stay away from him. He is dangerous
The second story, the husband is definitely a narc. He seems to vacillate between vulnerable, grandiose and malignant narcissism. Frankly she needs to file for divorce asap. But she will need to plan her exit strategically. Leaving a narcissistic relationship is extremely dangerous.
2nd story. Men do this so women file for divorce and they can say it's her fault for leaving. Let her be an absolute B, let her make him miserable, a taste of his own medicine.
Just want to say that I appreciate how educational your content is! It's easy for content like this to be rage bait, but you're here trying to teach women and make our lives better and I love that. Thank you ❤️
"Red flags earlier on in the relationship...he would be mean for no reason"....ma'am. To each her own. When she gets tired of suffering, she'll do something about it. If casual activity makes you feel bad, don't have casual activity. Re: grandpa....she checked him appropriately. The last woman, so sad. He didn't change - he was always like that. Just hid it until he felt he trapped her. Smart not to totally co-mingle funds. Always have your own money/communiy somewhere or try to.
The woman in the first story gave her father tough love. Men seem to think doling out tough love for everyone else is fine, but when it comes their way it’s out of line. NTA
Never could do casual sex. I tried in the past (going out with the intention of just smex), but could not get past their unfamiliar hands on my skin. It makes me so uncomfortable. I’ve learned that I need a connection and trust.
Sometimes grandparents want a do over to make up for the mistakes they made when raising their own kids. But, i say keep the nanny because you dont want to find out the hard way how incompetent the grands may be.
Pregnancy is a trigger to domestic abuse for some abusive men. Pregnancy makes you sometimes these guys don't actually want the child even when it's a planned pregnancy, they just want the control. This stuff would happen even if they don't know about past trauma. Because ultimately these guys are predators and they literally sniff out vulnerability. Her vulnerability was probably more likely to be that she doesn't have any family to protect her. Pregnancy is just the opportunity for the mask to slip. It doesn't sound like this is the first time this guy has been violent towards a woman. There wasn't much of an apology. No real remorse at all. No offer to get help. Emptying her account etc sounds like this was planned..i bet his mother knows his history too. I had to do DV training for my job and pregnancy has been identified for a long time as a trigger. It's a shame that girls aren't provided with this type of info prior to starting relationships so they can understand the need to protect yourself even in your relationships. Women need to understand that men are our biggest risk factor.
First Story: I think being honest about the way your parents failed you is necessary. There’s no way to NOT come off as an asshole, unfortunately. Just pull the pin and let shit fly. There’s no other way! 3:35
I think the real issue is a lot of women have sex in ways they think they’re “supposed” to. That’s why I always say make sure you are being safe, physically and _emotionally_ . Sex is supposed to be enjoyable so if that means being in a commitment first, then hold that boundary. You’ll be grateful for it. I didn’t become sexually actively till 24, so I do think there’s value in waiting. Personally, I thoroughly enjoy being single. I’ve had a lot of people say or imply I can’t have casual relationships and also expect respect. Like uhh no? Anyone that wants access to me, in any form or fashion, *must* also respect me. Never hear any of this said to men… I don’t do ONS so my partners are always known to me. I never let them rush or pressure me.I’m upfront about what I want from the situation so it’s hard to use weaponized incompetence. If they fuck up, they get cut off. That’s it. It works for me and if a day comes that it doesn’t. I’ll adjust accordingly.
Before I even see this whole video, I just have to call out the sister in the first story. That woman's sister doesn't have children, so it's unfair of her to judge her sister for her parenting choices. If she doesn't think her son will be safe with his grandfather, that's her call to make;even if the sister didn't sugarcoat the way she told her father the reasons of why she would never.
That husband in the second story, based on what she said in her post, shows traits consistent with both the Malignant Narcissist and the Grandiose Narcissist. He wants to go on dates to show off to random strangers his wealth and his wife, not to connect with his wife. He even shows behavior in this story that, in my unprofessional opinion, is consistent with sociopathy. She needs to protect herself and her children and leave before it gets worse and he becomes violent.
Sadly if its a shared account either owner can take everything out of the account whenever they want. Never mix money unless its purely for bills. "He doesnt do empathy" oh no
#3) I'm ace. I figured out I don't like rejection no matter where it comes in the event; that I prefer emotional closeness to being found attractive; and that at best the event itself is no more to me than a good sneeze if it's not about the true intimacy of an emotional connection. (Even then, it's not something I am drawn to; I know that part isn't something most women will relate to. But the rest, I think, is something more people will feel the same about.) In the end, casual activity to me seems like chasing the high but never catching it. It's like one of those Little Debbie cakes, but stale, the one with the wax frosting; when what you want is a decadent, top quality bakery cake. It's kinda the same, but it's really not.
I can't lie, this is a heavy compilation, the second and fourth story are especially disheartening. You can tell those men are working hard to break those women. I hope they'll make it out safely. I feel like the woman in the third story who said men make it so easy to not want a single thing to do with them.
If he actually started taking medicine, he's stopped. Men do that. He's acting as if he hates her because he does. This is struggle love. Not worth it.
2nd story: the no empathy, and the fact he thought speaking "I'm sorry" meant that the problem should never be brought up again? Acting like a total ass clown toward your partner and apologizing without changing the behavior that requires the apology is 100% manipulative. If you treat somekne likw shit, you don't get to apologize and pretend you didn't hurt them, and also not talk with them about it. I would've divorced his ass long before any child came into the picture. Hell, even the verbal abuse while pregnant would've been enough for me to bounce. I would have recorded a lot of it first, and I would have sent that to anyone that wanted to know why I left.
2nd story - he’s a narcissist and he hates her. Enjoys making her crazy and thinks he’s better than her/deserves better than her. He wasn’t happy about her being pregnant, didn’t want to share her attention with kids. Narcissists like to yo-yo you around. They make you feel like crap so you’ll work for their approval/attention/their alien version of “love” then give you just enough crumbs to keep you holding on - rinse and repeat. She needs to take the kids and run now.
Whew, talk about a baby trap. That was a bear trap the huzzzzband set for his wife in story 3. Best advice I've ever heard: only have a baby with a man if you can honestly say pre-pregnancy that you would still want and love the child, if your partner turns out to be a cheater, a proponent of DV or if their death precedes yours. I have NEVER met such a man, hence my child free status
The last story is so sad. She needs to update her medical directives and POA. I wouldn’t let someone like that in charge of my life if I couldn’t make any decisions. He’d pull the plug.
I think the problem is some of us care too much about other people’s feelings who make it clear that they don’t care about yours. The dad is a jerk. There is such a thing as present-absent parents. Just because you are in the home, doesn’t mean you wanted to be there.
Second story lady: that man is in the Discard stage of an abusive relationship. He no longer sees her as a prize worth treating well, and he will continue to abuse her, and likelg escalate the abuse. He will be hypercritical of everything she does. She will never be good enough for him, bc HE has decided that she's not good enough, PERIOD. I hope she leaves and takes her babies someplace safe, and sets up a peaceful life without him...
That second guy sounds miserable. I’ll let him live in it. Reminds me of my ex husband. Never appreciated what I did and always had issues when we went out.
2nd story: he’s a textbook narcissist, and the worst kind, he sounds like a covert narcissist and she needs to leave …I’m sad that she gave him two children….nothing will ever satisfy him ….ever ! Take your sanity and babies and go
Second story "he doesn't do empathy" ... you already know it's gonna be bad
He doesn’t like his wife either. I wouldn’t be surprised if he had a side piece.
@@savoir777faire I wouldnt be suprised if the side piece was the babysitter.
Thanks for the content warning
Bracing myself
I thought that too!@ARCHOUSE5150
I think the man is narsissist and the women is codependent and It's a rattling mixture. not everyone can be in a relationship with a person with mental issues. Divorce is the best option for kid's happiness.
The last story, the woman thinks her husband “turned into a monster” he didn’t. He was faking being nice before (that was his representative). And once she got pregnant she met the real him. I feel terrible for her and hope she gets as far away from him as she can. He’s a danger to her and that baby.
So males will wait 10 years to drop the mask 😂😂😂😂😂
@@brownjadedAbsolutely. These psychos will wait as long as they need to wait in order to trap us. Especially if they can get offspring out of it. What choice does he have? He needs her womb.
@@brownjadedThey will wait as long as they need to.
@@brownjadedyes the mask drops when the women gets pregnant or when they get married because they feel she won’t leave
Second, she needs to realize that he actually does hate her. It’s time for to divorce
It's terrifying how men can hide their true personalities for years until they think they have a woman trapped. It's hard to believe they are really human sometimes
THANK YOU!
I truly believe they are more demonic than anything
Subhuman Neanderthals.
"Ohhh, but you shoulda _choseeee betterrrr!"_ Sir, how can we vet liars? Men who hide their true personalities? 😒🙄
Yep the reason I’ll never have kids. Cant give a man too much leverage or too many advantages.
@d.c6351 one of the reasons I'm childfree too.
Narcissists are renowned for ruining holidays. The husband that likes to take his wife on emotional roller coasters and nothing is ever his fault has very narcissistic tendencies. The pregnant woman whose husband moved out needs to put up cameras around the house.
EVERYONE in the world has "narc tendencies," this guy IS a narc.
Second story: he doesn't "act" like hes hating her (her words). He really does hate her.
Yes 💯
Yes she needs to leave him
Right that is such a horrible thing to go through, I really hope that she leaves him and pull herself together and take care of her kids and herself….❤
Casual sex rejection! Tell him no, and I promise you he will always come back until you say yes. I’m 47 years old and there are men in my DMs from high school that I turned down for sex still trynna get it. Men need to hear no sometimes, it helps them grow.
Yes, it’s probably partly a self-esteem thing and over valuing men’s approval. A man’s rejection shouldn’t never so much that you have disappointing sex. If he does disappear when he hears no, that’s a good thing. Shows that’s all he was after anyway
And if they don’t come back, who cares! No means No! If he’s not willing to wait, he’s not worth it anyway!
😅😅 my grandma used to tell us, "keep 'em wanting." She was one of the most wise women I've ever known.
Casual s8x for some if not most women is just a waste of time & an unnecessary risk to take. Even s8x within a "committed relationship" with males can be just as risky and dangerous (and still not satisfying). Why do it?
Yeeaa had a situation with a guy from college and it’s about the same
Also that last lady doesn’t put his name on the birth certificate. Leave him off at all costs. Give the baby your name.
Six months. He waited till she couldn't safely terminate. This is why I'm an advocate for lying about your due date and feeding false info like you can't terminate after four months. If they act up as soon as they think you can't back out, yeet.
It's not hard for bad men to wait those few extra months until child is born. My grandfather and father was like that.
Good idea
Men like to say "the juice is not worth the squeeze".
After reading all of this I can say "the Salami is never worth the bologna that will be brought into your life."
Single, celibate, & childfree = safe, sane, & financially solvent.
Love this 👏
Periodt
#4 that "freeze" she hates herself for might have kept her alive. She is NOT SAFE.
That man didn't change. He's a psychopath.
These videos are very useful for us single childfree women. Everyday im reminded that im not missing out on anything ❤
Glad you like them!
Girl every time I see one of these videos, I realise I dodged many bullets. Lord have mercy!
Effing same!
@@BurbNBougie yes, please keep them coming!! ♥️🥰
Free birthcontrol. 🙌
Second story: yup he's a narc.😢
My abusive ex Narc did these _very_ things. Start fights with his complaining and bad mood, getting angry when I'd cry, calling my emotions and "inconvenience" for him, no empathy whatsoever, over all a monster who wanted to drag me into the hell that is his mind and soul.
Run, girl. Run fast!! He will kill you and your light with this co start treatment. 😢
Me too. He's 100% a narcissist. My narc does the same exact things I mean I can't even count how many times I've cried the way she describes. In public but you can't cry out loud or the narc will get mad. They want to keep up appearances in public and then once you're alone they don't care how they act.
I definitely see lots of BPD, borderline more than narcissism. But def see narcissistic tendencies too. Hot and cold, push and pull, out of control emotions, possible lack of sense of self (acting like a rich snob out of nowhere). I am more familiar with BPD so it is easier to see for me. Interesting to hear your perspectives!
Yea the no emotions strikes me as Antisocial PD which is often comorbid with NPD. But regardless of possible diagnosis (which he probably will not get anyways, esp if Narcissism or Antisocial is his main issue) dude is toxic AF and would need lots of help and hard work to get better(and may not be capable of change at all).
Last woman is smart. That sort of abusive behavior will escalate. Leaving is the best thing she could do for her and her baby.
She needs a permanent order of protection.
I am terrified for that last lady. It’s not over, he can follow her from work or the hospital to her new place. I hope she takes more steps to prepare for the worst: weapons, etc. she should let her new neighbors know so they can keep their eyes peeled for suspicious activity, him or his car etc. this is a dangerous one
If he had the time to flat the tires, he had time to plant a tracking device
That last story has me ugly crying. Thank you for the opportunity to look some of my grief in the face! Almost a decade post divorce and I am still dealing with that “no man will want a single mom”. It’s been true for me, sadly. It’s good to cry it out and process the hurt even this many years later.
Thank you for sharing and being here. You are seen 🫶🏾
You’re probably better off single anyways.🤷🏽♀️ These dudes don’t add any value to a relationship, they just want to drain your energy. Any man worth your time will accept you just the way you are. Don’t feel bad about being single. It’s Gods protection! You’re not missing out on anything.
Listen to Monique. 🙂💛
It’s sick. But this world is wicked.. and don’t have more no matter how hard a male desires
@@oOIIIMIIIOowhy?
First story naw that deadbeat cannot use the grand baby as a do over as a grandfather when he failed to properly parent and care for the OP and her siblings. Her mother did all the work has the audacity to criticize her. He’s struggling because he’s a king baby with no wife. He’s out of line period! He needs to dominate and control his emotions and life. Not hers! She can have five naninies it’s not his business! She’s not the AH.
Second story she needs to file for divorce now! He just wants to dominate and control her. She needs permission to exist it’s pure bs! She needs to divorce now. He’s evil and abusive and will never change! He’s a typical Narc. This marriage is a prison period! She’s not the AH!
The last story is terrifying. I hope she can get out safe.
It’s really sad that you can’t be vulnerable with men! Many really do use your trauma against you. Relationships with most men are like eating a struggle meal. Sad and unfulfilling. You almost rather go hungry. Not like it’s nourishing or anything…
That’s a good way to put it
That last one...... Could have easily been a murder.
He kept her alive because she's his human incubator.
None of these women are the problem, per usual.
The second story, that man is a narcissist. The medication she speaks of will never work. There is no magic pill for a personality disorder. It will never get better. She is being abused and needs to leave as soon as is humanly possible.
The last story is a narcissist also. They can be whomever they need to be for as long as they need to be until they think you are trapped. You can't vet. There is no way to vet this kind of thing. The only thing you can do is know your worth, pack your feelings away, and be okay with leaving.
Second story with the lady crying at dinner, this guy hates her. He got the kids he wanted out of her, he's done with her, but probably doesn't want to have to pay child support, so he tolerates keeping her around but entertains himself by being abusive and cruel to her. Wow. Yeah she should move on. It'll be hard with three young kids, though.
2nd story… omg, some of these “husbands” are so insufferable 😩😩 what’s the point of being married to someone like that?? Ppl tell me I’m too picky, but idc. I’d rather be picky than settle for someone who is constantly in conflict with me and constantly causing me misery. I refuse to believe men like him become that way overnight.
The woman who is functioning on 2 hours of sleep and has narcissist husband needs to quit having babies clearly than man likes torturing her.
You clearly don't understand narcs. lol.
@@radicalreactions1633how so? Narcs love having a go-to person to torment. That’s why they blow up when the victim leaves.
Second story: sounds like he is conditioning her to never want to go out on dates...
But he doesn’t want it to look like he doesnt want to take her out. So he insists on them going out (to save face) but then ruins every outing (so that she will refuse to go out with him in the future).
I bet that he will complain to friends and family about how she never wants to go out anymore and how he is the only one trying to keep the spark alive, blah blah blah.
It will look like she shares some of the blame when he eventually cheats.
He does sound narcissistic. Wanting to have the appearance of goodness without actually being good. She she should run before she loses herself and or her mind.
I was thinking the same. He makes dates so awful she never even asks to go out again.
Same with the marriage workbook. Starts a fight so he never has to face any real issues in the marriage and actually try to FIX them. He likes a miserable marriage, enough to make sure it stays that way
And how are you so sure? I don't think you've dealt with narcs. They don't have to be cheating to act this way, it's who they are.@@stucker3188
That's a good point - he's conditioning her to not seek intimacy and absolving himself of any blame
The lady who cried at dinner is being manipulated by her husband. He is purposely being mean to get her to leave. 😢
S2- she married a narcissist. It’s a classic move for narcissists to want to pretend to be grander than they are and when she didn’t play along it pissed him off. It’s weird the way she’s acting as if she doesn’t realize that part. It’s also classic Narc behavior to ruin special events. The random anger and mood swings is also a part of their playbook. He gets off on controlling her and if she doesn’t behave in the way he wants she’s punished by his anger and coldness. They don’t feel empathy. Therapy will do nothing to save this marriage. I just feel sad for her that she’s had so many children with him and won’t be able to truly get him out of her life anytime soon.
Im not even married to that man and i want a divorce. I hate this. People shouldnt be crying over their mean spouses! They should have spouses that support them and are kind.
The sister and Husband from the first story can shove it.
The last story!!! That was him the whole time!!! He hid it🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️🤷🏽♀️
#2. Girl get a divorce and cut your losses. It's clear that fool doesn't like her.
These dust mites are always the abusive A holes in these storms. Praying for the woman who is pregnant. May she and her child be safe and heal.
I feel exhausted for the second woman. She has put up with a lot in what is clearly an abusive relationship. She needs to stop trying so hard and leave so that she doesn’t normalize his emotional and verbal abuse for the kids. I wish her the best.
Girl, just get your ducks in a row and get on out of there.
Hmmmm. The reasons for getting together with regular men are dwindling. 😅 Who would want to be with someone who you can’t open up to? Dating is getting immensely rough.
It always was rough. It's just that women aren't taking that bs anymore, lol! It's been a long time coming, but yeah, we've finally accepted that the juice is indeed not worth the squeeze!
@@jayogee913 Nice. 😌 I feel the same way. I’m not getting involved with subpar men.
I’m worried about the second story, she wants marriage counselling but marriage counselling doesn’t work when an abuser is involved
He's cheating sis, that's why he's so impatient and snippy
The 2nd story, the husband’s cheating. It’s typical for men having an affair to become mean to their spouse. The wife should look into getting a divorce. The guy’s an a-hole. He tied her down with kids and now using her as a punching bag.
But it WAS already mean before she got together with it. It just hid it under a joke. Here’s the thing I’ve realized that these zYX are more parasite that human. It means basically 4 things. 1. They CANNOT even like you, you are their prey. A predator CANNOT like it’s prey. CANNOT
2. They defiantly CANNOT love you. You are two different species. Hello!!! Love is not possible be two different species. Love men feel is more line extreme satisfaction all their needs are being met.
3. It also means once they feel they’ve used you up to you max, thry are literally disgusted by you. It’s like maggots in a dead body. New maggots will prefer new dead bodies, yes? It’s like a tooth brush. Once a tooth brush is used up, you want a new one and discard the old one.
That men’s they are looking for an exit. And am exist looks like…this. It could also look like he needs her bc he doesn’t have a new situation yet so he’s ready to go, but he’s not ready to go. Get it? The exist could also be he would stay with her for life but has no problem losing her. Or even an exit coukd look like cheating where you’re still using the woman but you’re acting single in the world.
He’s in one of those situations. Something tells me he’s looking for his next nookie, by that dude is done with her.
He said he doesn’t want
But she said he has always been like this, but the frequency increased. He’s just an abuser, and abuse gets worse over time
I thought the same thing.
He also sounds bipolar.
💯
Being an a-hole in general but also, he’s presented himself to his girlfriend as wealthy. He enjoys doing it up big and acting fancy at restaurants, but his wife bursts his bubble by not playing along. Not even in a mean way, just not playing rich lady (because they aren’t). Guarantee he called her when he went to the car.
He might even go to that exact restaurant with the other woman and his wife is ruining his rep by being frugal.
Gross guy all around.
@annemarie3811 Do you one better it's possible it's the baby sitter he is sleeping with.
Personally, i never wanted a random putting their hands on me. There has to be a real emotional connection and time. How can you feel comfortable, safe and special with a stranger? Id rather just get a device and use that instead of using a whole human being to scratch a temporary itch.
Right? Honestly, s3x with men is usually underwhelming anyway. Most women have to finish themselves up anyway. And honestly, I don't care if it sounds tone deaf, but most other women I know who chase casual s3x are indeed often looking for a committed partner. And they think that giving them s3X will get a man to commit. That pretty much never works out for them.
My dad, now aged 77, still remembers the bdays of all of my siblings and myself. It's true that men of that era didn't change diapers. I accept that people are products of their era. But he always found time to take us out even if it was just for ice cream with dad. He was an investment banker. He arrived home and mom was always ready to deliver happy hour to him. But he often wanted the kids with him in the parlor for that. He wanted to hear about our day. Kids only need to be shuttered away from dad upon his arrival from work if they are a source of more stress. My dad sure seems to like us and he seemed to have stress relief from us. If you don't like kids, that's cool. But you probably won't be asked to babysit. Kids don't need the expert. They need the person who wants to be with them.
My dad remembers everyone’s birthday but mine. Idk why he does that…
I disagree, a child’s safety is more important than a grown man’s preferences and desires. If someone has proven themselves to be unknowledgeable about taking care of a baby unsupervised, and is unwilling to be taught the proper way, they are not looking out for that child’s best interests.
@@CharlieApples what that I said do you disagree with? Did you interpret what I said to mean that someone who doesn't care or learn to care about children should be allowed to watch them?
@@TheePrincessBrat- That's a power play. Don't invite him or acknowledge his anymore. If he can't remember yours then it won't make a difference if he isn't involved in it.
@@kdphotos4691 it’s weird because it started out of nowhere. My 17th birthday was the first time he did that. Maybe he stopped pretending to care because he wouldn’t be paying child support on me anymore 🧐
I don’t give him gifts or acknowledge his bday or holidays. Last Father’s Day my sister and I spent the whole day out together 🤣
Potty train a 4 month old?????
From which planet is he from??? 😂😂😂😂😂
The story about the couple in the restaurant.. that man is an abusive narcissist. She needs to leave.. there is no saving the marriage. She should do what she can to minimise his contact with her children because he’s going to damage them too.
"He drove the babysitter home".
I bet money thats he's cheating with her. He's taking his anger out on the wife and he's rushing the dinner so he can get back to the babysitter.
Good catch. That seems highly plausible.
Exactly what I thought too. Men who drive the babysitter home are not to be trusted. If you wanna make some money babysitting find your own ride. Or ask the wife....
I thought the same.
My first thought. If he got her the new iPhone, welp . She's lost now . 😮
Oh, I listened to the grandfather one yesterday.....barely spent any time with his kids but knows what hes doing because he raised 4. 🙄
No, he'd come home from work, eat dinner then check out.
Sounds like he fathered them but he didn't raise them. He was a glorified sperm donor.
his mother bailed him out…
First story - NTA. Dad is looking for a hobby and thinks caring for an infant will fill the bill.
Since he.sounds rather bull-headed, I would have also asked him to change the baby's diaper (Including wiping), feeding and burping, etc.
Who on earth hires a male nanny?😂 I’ve only heard of it once, and it ended up with the male nanny making child corn with the kid. In fact, here in Houston last month, a male volunteered to watch 2 toddler boys for a coworker who was called into her job at the Galleria, and he took the boys into the bathroom, called 6 of his friends, and they gang graped these 2 boys repeatedly on film whilst berating them. That’s why it’s a no go to have a male babysitting.
The thing is, if he wasn't active in bringing up his own children, he has no idea how closely you have to look after a toddler, or how easily they can get into trouble (climbing onto counter, messing with electrical socket, pulling electrical cords, opening refrigerator, dropping a glass jar, putting small items in his mouth, ect.).
He can learn, but it's not instinctive to him yet. So, he would literally need to be supervised until he becomes good at babysitting.
Second guy is a WILD. To stress out your pregnant wife is unacceptable. He wants a punching bag and he is going to unalive her through her nervous system.
4th story... yep that does it. Never getting married lol
She won the conversation when the dad couldn't answer her "tough" questions.
This convinces me that you have to have your own money to raise your kids before having them- 'cause the husband can just turn. Like, going in to a marriage it is as almost you gotta be rich :/
That last story is stuck in my brian. Just the image of her, 6 months pregnant, trying to passively walk by him and him quietly shoving her over and over until she falls. That man has been a bully his whole life and his whole horrible self comes out when someone is at their most vulnerable. That's how all bullies are.
1… mom did the Right thing, that man can’t raise a dog let alone babysit a toddler-She has every Right to say who watches her child and who Don’t
2nd story: He’s finding fault with her because he’s already stepping out or at least interested in someone else. He hates her because she’s holding him back (in his delusional brain). She needs to get out of the situation. Who wants to be with someone who hates them? He’s an entitled spoiled narcissist.
Not a fan of casual sex. I tried to have my “moment” after leaving the ex narc, but it just isn’t who I am. And I don’t want to exchange energy with just anybody after finally getting free.
She could have drawn the same boundary without letting him know about her trauma. Everyrhing doesn't require a detailed explanation. If that is how you prefer to date, that is what you prefer. Be selective about what you choose to share with a man you barely know.
Most m3n use the trauma against wom3n.
@@manifest2203 exactly. That's why you should draw boundaries without telling them the boundary is related to trauma.
It's gotten so bad that I don't even go into too much detail about anything in the beginning. I just observe their behavior and determine if it fits my wants / needs or whether their normal behavior regularly crosses my boundaries. Because even without knowing past trauma, some will still pretend to respect boundaries until an attachment / connection develops. Then all 🔥breaks loose.
If he can't have a normal conversation with you on date night it's not a romantic relationship anymore. Mental health may be the reason, but that doesn't mean that you have to put up with it. Please don't allow someone's mental health issues destroy you. I may sound mean, but it's not your job to help them with that.
Men weaponize mental health alll the time
1. NTA - She has every right to protect her child & leaving her child w/someone incompetent who thinks they're going to fly in & be super gramps when they have no real basis for it is foolish.
2. He doesn't love you & he's toxic to the children. Get rid of him.
I’m sorry her mom isn’t there to put him in his place for you.
How do you have a relationship with someone who is that delusional? That’s a serious question.
The mom probably enabled his behavior. He needs someone else to take on his bs.
@@candypettynettie487 Agreed - the mother is no longer here so he's looking for new victims.
Second story, yeah that's exactly what it's like to go out with a unaware narcissist.
They upset you & then get upset that you're upset- but honestly I think that type wants to upset you. They use you as an emotional punching bag- I think they like to get an emotional reaction.
Sometimes, no matter what you do, they're just going to be upset.
Fourth story was so scary, and that dude never took accountability- he cheated & tried to blame her, and from there made things worse & worse.
It's awful to think someone you trusted could turn like that... :(
The ruining every even and holiday flagged up to me
@joeshmoe0136 Oh yes, they love to ruin special occasions. My bad ex told me I ruined my own birthday, for him. Then he got really mad at me for "not being happy enough" 🙃
He told me I ruined special occasions, but he was always flipping out on them trying to provoke me.
It must suck to feel however they do, but it also sucks to deal with that nonsense.
2nd story - what is it with these people who get you into a position where it's hard for you to walk away and then turn into monsters. I hope the OP is OK.
Kudos to the woman who shined a light on grandad's true character. The 2nd story: that woman is living the "death by a thousand cuts" with that narc a-hole. Sad & lonely. The last story is a reminder that xys only pretend as long as it suits them and then, not content to just move on, they have to destroy their partner's mind, body and soul. As regards "casual sleeping with the enemy" did you notice how the OP said, "I feel like I HAVE TO put out," and later "b) I really am SO AFRAID of their reaction if I don't do it...". Most women won't acknowledge how much they fear men even tho there are millions of examples why we should. They show us every day. We're not allowed to say no, and when we do? well, "No means yes" is what we're told. XYs are a threat to women. She will just comply & pass on bodily autonomy without being told to. This is true for many women.
It’s not uncommon for first instances of physical abuse to start during pregnancy or shortly after. It’s very sad. She needs to stay away from him. He is dangerous
The second story, the husband is definitely a narc. He seems to vacillate between vulnerable, grandiose and malignant narcissism. Frankly she needs to file for divorce asap. But she will need to plan her exit strategically. Leaving a narcissistic relationship is extremely dangerous.
Second story. He’s having an affair. So get a good lawyer and get ready before he files.
Yeah in my experience they ruin every outing and special occasion no matter what
2nd story. Men do this so women file for divorce and they can say it's her fault for leaving. Let her be an absolute B, let her make him miserable, a taste of his own medicine.
When it comes to s3x as anything else, it's fine to be ok with a practice in theory but to not do that practice yourself.
2nd story.... Sounds like a total narc. Reminds me of my dad. He's a narc too. IDK why my mom deals with it
Omg my dad is a narc too
@@ingweking8748 yeah it's crazy he usually isn't nearly as unhinged as this guy but he still doesn't think about anybody but himself
Probably for the same reason that most spouses do, especially women, FEAR. Narcs are EXTREMELY DANGEROUS especially when you try to leave them.
“My whole life revolves around HIS moods and it’s not good.”
That👆part!
The last story has the potential for unaliving. He keeps escalating with each encounter.
I don't let my father babysit my kid. It has never been brought up in conversation, though.
Just want to say that I appreciate how educational your content is! It's easy for content like this to be rage bait, but you're here trying to teach women and make our lives better and I love that. Thank you ❤️
I appreciate that!
The first father got a reality check. People are afraid of you sir - it's not real respect.
"Red flags earlier on in the relationship...he would be mean for no reason"....ma'am. To each her own. When she gets tired of suffering, she'll do something about it. If casual activity makes you feel bad, don't have casual activity. Re: grandpa....she checked him appropriately. The last woman, so sad. He didn't change - he was always like that. Just hid it until he felt he trapped her. Smart not to totally co-mingle funds. Always have your own money/communiy somewhere or try to.
The 2nd story....she's needs to leave him ASAP!
Last story - needs cameras... needed cameras
.
The woman in the first story gave her father tough love. Men seem to think doling out tough love for everyone else is fine, but when it comes their way it’s out of line. NTA
Never could do casual sex. I tried in the past (going out with the intention of just smex), but could not get past their unfamiliar hands on my skin. It makes me so uncomfortable. I’ve learned that I need a connection and trust.
Sometimes grandparents want a do over to make up for the mistakes they made when raising their own kids. But, i say keep the nanny because you dont want to find out the hard way how incompetent the grands may be.
Pregnancy is a trigger to domestic abuse for some abusive men. Pregnancy makes you sometimes these guys don't actually want the child even when it's a planned pregnancy, they just want the control. This stuff would happen even if they don't know about past trauma. Because ultimately these guys are predators and they literally sniff out vulnerability. Her vulnerability was probably more likely to be that she doesn't have any family to protect her. Pregnancy is just the opportunity for the mask to slip. It doesn't sound like this is the first time this guy has been violent towards a woman. There wasn't much of an apology. No real remorse at all. No offer to get help. Emptying her account etc sounds like this was planned..i bet his mother knows his history too. I had to do DV training for my job and pregnancy has been identified for a long time as a trigger. It's a shame that girls aren't provided with this type of info prior to starting relationships so they can understand the need to protect yourself even in your relationships. Women need to understand that men are our biggest risk factor.
First Story: I think being honest about the way your parents failed you is necessary. There’s no way to NOT come off as an asshole, unfortunately. Just pull the pin and let shit fly. There’s no other way! 3:35
I think the real issue is a lot of women have sex in ways they think they’re “supposed” to. That’s why I always say make sure you are being safe, physically and _emotionally_ . Sex is supposed to be enjoyable so if that means being in a commitment first, then hold that boundary. You’ll be grateful for it. I didn’t become sexually actively till 24, so I do think there’s value in waiting.
Personally, I thoroughly enjoy being single. I’ve had a lot of people say or imply I can’t have casual relationships and also expect respect. Like uhh no? Anyone that wants access to me, in any form or fashion, *must* also respect me. Never hear any of this said to men…
I don’t do ONS so my partners are always known to me. I never let them rush or pressure me.I’m upfront about what I want from the situation so it’s hard to use weaponized incompetence. If they fuck up, they get cut off. That’s it. It works for me and if a day comes that it doesn’t. I’ll adjust accordingly.
Before I even see this whole video, I just have to call out the sister in the first story. That woman's sister doesn't have children, so it's unfair of her to judge her sister for her parenting choices. If she doesn't think her son will be safe with his grandfather, that's her call to make;even if the sister didn't sugarcoat the way she told her father the reasons of why she would never.
Last story so proud of the op and her future is definitely brighter
That husband in the second story, based on what she said in her post, shows traits consistent with both the Malignant Narcissist and the Grandiose Narcissist. He wants to go on dates to show off to random strangers his wealth and his wife, not to connect with his wife. He even shows behavior in this story that, in my unprofessional opinion, is consistent with sociopathy. She needs to protect herself and her children and leave before it gets worse and he becomes violent.
Sadly if its a shared account either owner can take everything out of the account whenever they want. Never mix money unless its purely for bills.
"He doesnt do empathy" oh no
The last story she needs to make sure her dogs aren't chipped.
#3) I'm ace. I figured out I don't like rejection no matter where it comes in the event; that I prefer emotional closeness to being found attractive; and that at best the event itself is no more to me than a good sneeze if it's not about the true intimacy of an emotional connection.
(Even then, it's not something I am drawn to; I know that part isn't something most women will relate to. But the rest, I think, is something more people will feel the same about.)
In the end, casual activity to me seems like chasing the high but never catching it. It's like one of those Little Debbie cakes, but stale, the one with the wax frosting; when what you want is a decadent, top quality bakery cake.
It's kinda the same, but it's really not.
I can't lie, this is a heavy compilation, the second and fourth story are especially disheartening. You can tell those men are working hard to break those women. I hope they'll make it out safely. I feel like the woman in the third story who said men make it so easy to not want a single thing to do with them.
That second one... he's one breath away from turning into a physical abuser. She needs to run NOW.
If he actually started taking medicine, he's stopped. Men do that. He's acting as if he hates her because he does. This is struggle love. Not worth it.
2nd story: the no empathy, and the fact he thought speaking "I'm sorry" meant that the problem should never be brought up again? Acting like a total ass clown toward your partner and apologizing without changing the behavior that requires the apology is 100% manipulative. If you treat somekne likw shit, you don't get to apologize and pretend you didn't hurt them, and also not talk with them about it. I would've divorced his ass long before any child came into the picture. Hell, even the verbal abuse while pregnant would've been enough for me to bounce. I would have recorded a lot of it first, and I would have sent that to anyone that wanted to know why I left.
2nd story - he’s a narcissist and he hates her. Enjoys making her crazy and thinks he’s better than her/deserves better than her. He wasn’t happy about her being pregnant, didn’t want to share her attention with kids. Narcissists like to yo-yo you around. They make you feel like crap so you’ll work for their approval/attention/their alien version of “love” then give you just enough crumbs to keep you holding on - rinse and repeat. She needs to take the kids and run now.
Annoyed by other’s’ emotions and doesn’t do empathy; acting like he’s rich even though he’s not; sounds like a grandiose narcissist to me
Whew, talk about a baby trap. That was a bear trap the huzzzzband set for his wife in story 3. Best advice I've ever heard: only have a baby with a man if you can honestly say pre-pregnancy that you would still want and love the child, if your partner turns out to be a cheater, a proponent of DV or if their death precedes yours. I have NEVER met such a man, hence my child free status
The last story is so sad. She needs to update her medical directives and POA. I wouldn’t let someone like that in charge of my life if I couldn’t make any decisions. He’d pull the plug.
I think the problem is some of us care too much about other people’s feelings who make it clear that they don’t care about yours. The dad is a jerk. There is such a thing as present-absent parents. Just because you are in the home, doesn’t mean you wanted to be there.
Valid critique.
Second story lady: that man is in the Discard stage of an abusive relationship. He no longer sees her as a prize worth treating well, and he will continue to abuse her, and likelg escalate the abuse. He will be hypercritical of everything she does. She will never be good enough for him, bc HE has decided that she's not good enough, PERIOD.
I hope she leaves and takes her babies someplace safe, and sets up a peaceful life without him...
That second guy sounds miserable. I’ll let him live in it. Reminds me of my ex husband. Never appreciated what I did and always had issues when we went out.
2nd story: he’s a textbook narcissist, and the worst kind, he sounds like a covert narcissist and she needs to leave …I’m sad that she gave him two children….nothing will ever satisfy him ….ever ! Take your sanity and babies and go
The worst kind is malignant, the rage kind. And clearly you've never dealt with either kind, you can't just leave a narc.
@@radicalreactions1633they're all equally horrid in different ways, this isn't a suffering contest
@@radicalreactions1633 my baby father is one 😑 so yes I do …
@@briskettacos thank you …😊