How To Get Out Of A Blind Date. Greg Warren - Full Special
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 12 ธ.ค. 2020
- How to get out of a blind date according to Greg Warren is just to keep an eye out for your friends subtle head shakes. Whether it's eating in a restaurant alone, or going out to eat with your older uncle, this full Dry Bar Comedy special from Greg Warren is sure to keep you laughing from start to finish.
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that headshake is all tooo real LOOL
"What do you want to drink?"
"Assorted beverages."
Lol!
I can’t get over his delivery and jokes. They are like high end dad jokes. 😂
Best way to describe him 😂
😂😂high end Dad jokes 😂😂😂😂
Very high end 😂
All without being a dad?? How tf??
High End Dad Free Jokes 🙌🏽
The Top Hat - " 'John Wilks Booth' put him out of business!" 😂😂
Greg deserves his own show, he is so funny.
How old am I , five minutes in I finally figured out I had already watched this whole thing. Life is good, I can now watch videos several times and each time they are new and just as funny.
I thought I was the only one...😂😅😂
"Where is your wife?"
-Uh we're actually sepirated😂
No one spells "separated" as "sepirated". You missed the joke. It was "seperated".... Doh!
@@jimswenson6131 shut up jim
@@bootygrabber4000 Did yo mama teach you to talk that way?
He needs to start bringing a sign with him that says "in the bathroom, not done yet. Do not take my food" 🤣😂
The old man voice is legendary 👏🏾
“Nice job, Crumbs” 😂
For real I showed my girlfriend this dude just because of that voice
Perfect
Restaurant manager to a solo diner: "So what brings you here?" Him: "food mostly, I heard you had it, I wanted to eat it"🤣🤣🤣
Or my two feet attached to my hungry body.
@@earlhollar1906 🤣🤣Love it!
"So what brings you here?"
....
...
...
...
W-What?
When people ask me what brought me here I tell him it was my car!
"I was wearing loafers" had me rolling on the floor. The dog thought I was having a fit.
My dog gets freaked when I cough lol, she looks at me like I'm possessed or dying!
"Luther, the blade of grass"
That's as random as they come🤣🤣🤣
This man, where's he at💗
Love his medical terms " Hurtis Alotis" 😆😆😆
I am this man! Lol
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@denasharpe2393 00000000
I've had that condition the last 40 years.
Count me in too
Whew! That was a blast! Speed, delivery, never broke character, voices, play on words! Just great!
The old man voice just kept getting funnier 😂
"Nobody's talking to you rutabaga head!"
"It loses 90% of it's value, as soon as you drive it off the lot... Then you gonna get diabetus two days later"
“Assorted beverages!”
Steak and pork
Next time I'm at outback... "I'll have the Signature Steaks with the Freshly Made Sides and an Irresistible Deserts please. "
“I can’t hurdle.. if I could hurdle I’d be over that fence and you’d never see me again” 😂😂😂
"FOOTIS HURTIS ALOTUS"
I felt that!!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I ran cross country in high school. Well, one day I missed the bus.
This is one of the best comedians I’ve heard in a long time. 😂
I dig how calm he is, yet still be hilarious. 👍👍
w- what?
Yeah that understated style works really well.
Isn't the style deadpan?
Me too
@@timothyfloogle : No. Steven Wright does deadpan.
When he said sepeerated I died 😂😂🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 he’s freaking hilarious ! why doesn’t he have his own special on Netflix yet? I can watch a marathon of him ..
The MRI joke is the single most relatable thing to come out a comic's mouth. Seriously traumatizing.
Takes me back to the war, and I've never been in a war.
I come back to watch it again and again
Or that cage they put around your head 😖
So true , its awful
LOL
Yes! The one I had, provided by the VA, sounded like I was inside a metal trash can and people were banging on it with hammers. Greg actually understated the experience.
I was out with a couple that I went to school with . This was 20 some years after we graduated. I was divorced. We're leaving the bar and the wife says " I have a friend I can fix you up with. The last couple I fixed up ended up getting married ". Before I could say, no thanks,her husband says "That's it Beth, scare him off with the threat of marriage "
I started cross country in 6th grade. I remember hearing the term and being worried I'd miss school and fail classes because I'd miss tests and assignments, but was simultaneously disappointed that we never left our county.
😂
Lol I remember asking a girl in my 9th grade art class what cross country was. And she lied to me and said they got to run across the state of Texas and if they were good enough they’d build up to running across America. And I almost joined the team. Then my track buddy gave me the 411. Smh, made me feel so dumb.
@@breethomas9555 TV. Y. Up u. U. I.
Ug. Y. Y. Y. G. Yy u. L. is.
U.
@@breethomas9555 4
I’m one of those people who sees something once and then I’m done. This man is the first exception to that in my 70 years of loving laughter. This guy is lik😊e new joy every time I think of fish sandwiches! He’s just hysterical!
Have you seen his "the salesman" special? Had me rolling too.
I’m with you King. I’ve watched his videos many times.
Same. 64 yrs
“He’s a vagrant Muriel he just wants money” 😂
As a runner his jokes were so on point.
The cross country coach said every day
"run to there -
then run back."
"Run"
I watch this one when I want to feel better immediately. He is so witty. Very intelligent and imaginative. I will never tire of the "get a job, hippy"
His voice and how he says stuff is hilarious…
I have found that the cure for feeling better is a fish sandwich...
Admit it you started singing it lol 😆
Yes!!!! I felt that way
dry bar is GOLD - you find clean comedians really challenging themselves on clean comedy, top notch actually. I hear drybar all the time, great comedians.
*ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS A FISH SANDWICH!!!*
Friggin hilarious dude...hope to see more of his works. He's like one of the funniest grumpy old man I've ever seen.
And that fastest head shakes still got me on stitches...🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Even better than Walter doing a bidduuummmamaa.aay!??? Impersonation ..least Walter has his faculties about him ..even he'd be a better choice and ole.jeff as vice president..lmao
Yeah I’ve watched that part at least 50 times. That is hands down one of the best jokes ever. “ no no I love Karen. Greg you should marry Karen!” ( quick head shake)
apparently she was hungry. I bet it works sometimes. How many people would get her one to get her to shut up.
🐟😂🐟
I ways one of the ones who had it in my head the next day😅
Three minutes in and he already had me wheezing.
I didn’t think in my early twenties right before my birthday, that I’d have the pleasure of receiving an MRI, but if I had to describe my experience… I’d say he did a great job doing it.
How can anybody in their right mind, give this guy a thumbs down??!?! He had me in stitches, laughing so hard, all the way through!! 💖
It's all them fruit wagons lol
You absolutely right. He is brilliant. Clean cut standup. Love it!
You've apparently never worked in a restaurant
@@adamminard6725 I have, and it can be rough, physically, from the customers, as well as what we hear
@@emiliadavis8247 he is funny most of the time, the restaurant stuff just hits different. I was like, "I love this guy" and then "I will mess up his order on purpose." I think you get where I'm coming from lol
He do a really great job with old man's impressions.
This guy is insanely hilarious. They type of guy you blind date with and end up laughing all night . He would have me dying laughing. His humor makes him sexy.
This guy is hilarious! I love Dry Bar for introducing funny, clean comics. Now I just need the pandemic to be done so we can see these folks in person.
I said same thing as im a born again christian and I don't judge anyone of swearing ..I was one of the worst..when God made me ready to except his spirit in my heart this trucker broke down and cried in shame and joy cuz there is no other feeling like his love and knowing he has forgiven me..
@@ricatoni2 Great testimony.
@@johnnydough8841 ty bro
@@ricatoni2 FYI...it's "accept"...not "except".
Me too Jennifer
It's a repost, but still gold. Love his voices
Yeah, what's up with all those reposts lately?!
Probably not a lot of new material due to the pandemic.
We'll get a ton of pandemic jokes pretty soon
@@mauboy1983 i would imagine because every idiotic state is not allowing people in clubs for "covid" BS. There is no new routines right now
I've never seen this so I'm loving it
The fish sandwich thing is so funny because when I was a server I use to sing my orders back to myself then at the server station sing them out loud so I'd get extra tips for not writing down my orders and other servers hated it because they'd come into work the next day and tell me how all night my songs were stuck in their head.
LMAO I do that 😂👈💀
Too funny! Lmao
@@payableondeath9091 I use to live it. Plan on doing the same as an owner next year. Gonna make work fun again.
Went to the bathroom and returned to a family of five at his table. I laughed so dang hard. He is wonderful.
"All I want for Christmas is a fish sandwich!". Classic. Stuck in my head a year later. You have achieved legend status with my dad. "Eleventeen hot dogs to go!" I watched him grab a hot dog out of boiling water with 2 fingers and eat it. Love ya brother and thanks for the laughs. Just realized my dad may be a one star people. Lmao
😂😂😂
Wha…?
The first comedian to make me really laugh out loud in a while... LOVE him!!!
😂😂😂😂
Okay, this guy was outrageously funny! We were in pain watching this one! Great job Greg!
@born2xlr8 yep f
YES!!
The Last joke made me laugh so stinking hard ! " They said CLEAR"
Omg I'm laughing so hard,tears are running down my face
I really like this guy! He’s great 👍🏻. I need a laugh right now. Always can count on Drybar for a good time! 😂😃
Love his humor and presentation! Very handsome, too!
Wow, this guy is hysterical! I rarely literally LOL but he's so clever and has great delivery, too funny!
I'm pretty impressed. I laughed several times hysterically. Great job.
9:00min: How to make patients feel at ease in an MRI! LMFAO
He had me floored! I had tears rolling down my face. I sympathize with the plantar fasciitis. Standing in the middle of the street while people look at you like you are special is REAL. Yes, that stupid song is in my head and I will never eat a fish sandwich again without giggling. I needed this today.
I LOVE how he explains the husband of Merial saying “AHHHHHH…Don’t listen to him, he just wants your money he’s nothin’ but a Vagrant!” 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣
Outstanding 😊
I love watching a standup comedian, that has me laughing out loud instead of just smiles and chuckles.
One punchline after the other! I have watched this more than once. He is calmly hilarious 🤣
Incredible comic. Need to see more of him!
I want to buy a steak from him.
From cross country to MRIs he hit the nail on the head with every joke
Restaurants are in trouble! Yesterday hubby and I went out to eat and the first SEVEN restaurants had a note on their door saying they couldn't hire a second shift staff so they were going to be closing at 2pm for the foreseeable future!
No matter how bad things seem to be going for me . All I have to do is turn on dry comedy and before the first break I'm laughing my butt off. And I have to tell you I had forgotten how to laugh. I thought the fish sandwich song was going to make me die laughing. Right now I have tears in my eyes from thinking. About it . Thank you Dry Bar for bring back some laughter to my life.
You gotta listen to the lyrics, man, you're getting caught up in the beat!!!
Fish Sandwich for Christmas. Hmmm. We may start a new tradition.
" as soon as you drive it off the lot" 😂😭
I love how bitter he is about his age and how society bullies people like us for being single! (I am 47 and single, eating at restaurants alone too! Hahah!)
You're smoking hot. I'd go out with you. I'm an airline pilot so we could travel the world.
And plus I don't see where the profile name LadyAxe has anything to do with u being single ..lmao...😉🙃🤯😳..idk ladyfox..has a nice ring to it attracting guys curiosity..jus like..sayin..😂🤣😁😄😆😀
@@prorobo dating over 40 is like thrift store shopping!!??..lmfao...waaaaaahh!!waaaaaaaaaah!!..its true dammit!!🤣😂😅😆😅🤣😂
You people are so thirsty ._.
@Tom Youngest does she need?? My address?? Er what??
11:32 it’s so weird that as soon as he said this bit about car value depreciation, the commercial from Farmers Insurance came up, and it begins with words “A new car looses about 10% of its value…" 🤔
His OLD MAN VOICE! Too funny @ 11:01
Tie your shoes ...
"Save yourself son!"
Oh my gosh where's my inhaler hysterical!!?
If watched a LOT of Dry Bar Comedy and seen some amazing comics. This guy takes the cake! Truly hilarious! By the way, my grandson invented eggs. 😆
Yeah... But did the chicken invent your grandson... While crossing the road?
This guy has Charles Grodin crossed with Ray Liotta vibes. Love it
Love this guy, I'm in the UK & had never heard of him. I always watch the new DryBar video & have come across so many new brilliant comedians. I then search YT for any channels or just other videos they may have. I fell lucky with Greg, although I can't find a channel for him, he has got a stand-up special on Prime. 🇬🇧💗🇬🇧💗🇬🇧💗🇬🇧💗🇬🇧
Gotta love the briefest head shake in the world. ..clever unique and perfectly executed My wife and I try to repeat if at times - never quite succeeding
He's funny and humble at the same time. We should see more of this fine comedian. I can relate to the shake of the head signal given by my girlfriends hubbies to me and i am a woman! lol...i am happy to be single and that is the path i chose to go in life and yet i still feel i have had a lot of fun with friends and family along the way...Good luck Greg and keep on making them smile!
OMG! The "Bro Code" head shake warning about the crazy date! 00:51
Been there, done that! 😂😂😂
Lots of laughs from this guy's act!
Witty, clever, intelligent and very relatable. Loved it.
I love the acting stupid bit that he did at the end. Incidentally, did anyone notice how much his eyes look like Ray Liotta’s😊
This guy had me crying 😂😂
He's 1 of my favorites! 🤣
This was the best , my man had me laughing in my car on lunch like a psycho
LOL…I had that happen before; I was at a restaurant by myself and I went to the bathroom, I came back to find my half eaten meal gone and the booth being cleaned by the busboy. They thought I had left without paying. Got a new meal and got it free.
I laughed so many times throughout this performance, but at the last joke about the frog I laughed so hard for such a long time. This guy is brilliant.
I feel the eating alone at restruants thing .. ... most those things happened to me.
All I want for 🎄 is a 🐟 🥪
FISH SANWICH!!!
"Must have come from outside"
"Yes, yes outside"
"I know this 🐟 I've seen him outside all the time"
I understood that reference!
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@@EweChewBrrr01 that's Charlie, the starkist tuna spokes fish.
Great routine and definitely funny as hell.
That running part had me, my son is 6'5 and plays soccer, one of the things he complain about in TRAINING is "running aimlessly" around the field, (he's a stricker) 😂😂😂😂😂
Striker
@@dovie2blue
Centre forward.
@@dovie2blue "What???"
I would love an alarm clock that played the Fish Sandwich song (wake up smiling).
"Excuse me! You can not close half of your restaurant while I am the only one here! I am going to go over to that closed area and make a fort out of the tables and chairs and I doubt you will stop me!" XD that was awesome.
I love Greg Warren! Bring him back!
I laughed and laughed and laughed. Totally relatable and highly entertaining.
OMG it's about to get stuck..... Fruit wagon sings.... ALL I WANT FO CHRISTMAS IS A FISH......SANDWICH🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣I'm about to do this randomly around my friends🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Never heard this guy before. He's hilarious!!
....oh, and I'm gonna start calling people "fruit wagon."
I'm screaming in laughter!!!!
Greg, you are hilarious!!
You've set the tone for my life!!! ❤❤😂😂😂😂😂
This guy is so funny!!! What a hoot...
I needed some great laughter!
This guy is hilarious!! I have laughed out loud so much that my face cheeks and tummy hurt!!😂😂❤❤
😂😂😂😂❤❤❤❤🎉
"We got outta there for 9 dollars" "What was it, a hostage situation"? lol
This man is hilarious 😆
My neighbors 2 blocks over heard me laughing.. Bravo !!!..
Thank you
🤣🤣🤣 All the way through -- just rollin' 🤣🤣🤣 His dead-pan style makes it even more funny!
I think he's one of my favorites I've seen XD him playing stupid is hilarious XD
Hysterical! Brilliant!
Great talent, brilliant delivery, very funny!
The fog and the frog were wonderfully funny. Not to mention "clear" ! Can't forget those two jokes!