Quiet | Susan Cain | Talks at Google
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 29 ก.ย. 2024
- At least one-third of the people we know are introverts. They are the ones who prefer listening to speaking, reading to partying; who innovate and create but dislike self-promotion; who favor working on their own over brainstorming in teams. Although they are often labeled "quiet," it is to introverts that we owe many of the great contributions to society--from van Gogh's sunflowers to the invention of the personal computer.
Passionately argued, impressively researched, and filled with indelible stories of real people, Quiet shows how dramatically we undervalue introverts, and how much we lose in doing so. Taking the reader on a journey from Dale Carnegie's birthplace to Harvard Business School, from a Tony Robbins seminar to an evangelical megachurch, Susan Cain charts the rise of the Extrovert Ideal in the twentieth century and explores its far-reaching effects. She talks to Asian-American students who feel alienated from the brash, backslapping atmosphere of American schools. She questions the dominant values of American business culture, where forced collaboration can stand in the way of innovation, and where the leadership potential of introverts is often overlooked. And she draws on cutting-edge research in psychology and neuroscience to reveal the surprising differences between extroverts and introverts.
Perhaps most inspiring, she introduces us to successful introverts--from a witty, high-octane public speaker who recharges in solitude after his talks, to a record-breaking salesman who quietly taps into the power of questions. Finally, she offers invaluable advice on everything from how to better negotiate differences in introvert-extrovert relationships to how to empower an introverted child to when it makes sense to be a "pretend extrovert."
This extraordinary book has the power to permanently change how we see introverts and, equally important, how introverts see themselves.
The stimulaton goes further than noise. For myself clutter is too stimulating also. So glad for this revolution.
So true, that explains alot.
i'd also add temperature and smell. all the senses. I'm beginning to equate being an introvert wurh being HSP (highly sensitive person)
I'm the same with clutter. Interesting, as just tidying up, making more space, feels better.
Susan's voice is sooo soothing!!!!!! And I'm a proud Introvert woman!! ;))
nesha50421 I would make love to you.
close your eyes and her voice is Phoebe from Friends.
Yes!!
I can't unhear it
OMG You're right!
Geez noooo, I can't believe you compared her to an actress whose primary role in Friends was a totally dumb character.
OMG!! yeah!! I'm surprised
For many, success is not about happiness. Success is for making ones parents happy, for being a "good American", for attracting high status mates, and many other reasons. Being succesful for ones own inner happiness and well being is far to uncommon.
her voice is so musically soothing.
I'm so glad to hear this. I'm also mixed dominance and most of my life in the US they tried to make me do everything differently down to how I think and even trying to make me become right handed. I am more of a ambivert leaning towards introvert. I've spent the last few years truly figuring myself out and looking back I realize how stifled I was growing up, especially being from a typical Indian household where there was a very strict structure.
Introverts shouldn't be undervalued anymore in this society!
Lol, I almost don’t care if they value me or not if they would just be quiet and leave me alone.😂
Susan is a wonderful speaker. Love her ideas.
Even I got a feeling of dread when she said to split up into groups of 6
I love how I got an introvert and non-introvert dog.
I've have seen many talks... didnt find yet, one that really celebrates each kind of personality, always seems (sometimes very subtle) that is about "which one is better" than the other one. And i can understand talking about people like jobs, spielberg, etc to show the power of introverts, but they were all extreme intelligent, if you are extreme intelligent, extreme creative, have natural talents for well, there is a more chances to succeed even when you are introvert, but what about people who are just average.
The world would be a much better place if it was more introverted instead of the extroverted mess we have now
I'd say this applies only to rural areas in Finland.
At least you've discovered this so early (and yes, I say early) - I'm an introvert in my early 40s!
Johnny Carson was famous for having a TV show that reached millions of people, but in front of a few people, he was very shy and introverted.
OMG, You are describing my mind perfectly.
Another example of leadership by introverts is Herman Van Rompuy - who?! The European President at this time. He words it as: "Everyone has different facettes of personality. I don't know if I know myself completely. The I remains the biggest mystery. We look at ourselves as it's a stranger (Q Rimbaud & Nietzsche)"
Oh I fucking hate breaking up into groups.
As they say; you took the words from my mouth.
I am an introvert and looking to get Susan's book to learn more about this trait
interesting point of view
Hilarious, I didn't realise she was kidding at the start and I was already cringing at the idea of taking part in a task like that.
she rocks
when she says "familiar environments", imo it's about social ones.... But I don't have a problem with unfmailiar environments in general. I'd love to travel the world one day, but I'd rather do it alone, or with a girlfriend or something. 2 other people is probably my limit xD Going on vacation and bringing a bunch of people along, completely defeats the purpose of a "vacation." :Ptoo many people to me is basically sensory overload. It's like my mind has to work harder to "adjust" to it...LOL.
oh my god, poor susan. most of those questions were shyte. why do people feel the need to 'ask questions' when all they want it to speak themselves.
Lots of people are like lots of people.
(Who is Lisa Kudrow?)
hahaha, great minds think alike!
1:24
As a fellow Finn I disagree.
Money and fame in our society are becoming synonymous with extroversion. Being introverted, a thinker, or even a private individual is looked down by many. We are now expected in our culture to always be 'on", to be ready and able to be a social butterfly on the drop of a dime.
This point in my life I would rather be broke living by myself (or a compatable significant other) in a cabin in the woods and being true to me. A life without introspection and private moments is not worth having.
nature freak So true.
beautifully said, I see the society I'm heading into (I'm 19) and I don't wanna participate. If you don't want to play, you shouldn't have to play, RIGHT???? No! You gotta jump through these fucking hoops just to be happy! Fuck that. Happiness is my foundation. I'd rather create alone than consume together.
Susan Cain is a remarkable woman.
you know me so well Susan... I cried a little when I watched this.
someone understands what is going on. FINALLY!!!
Yeah it’s amazing I had to buy the book because it seems it’s all about me
She is hero of all introverts
This is fantastic info. I'm having relationship problems because I'm an extrovert and she's an introvert. I didn't understand introverts until a recent conflict. It was almost as if we were speaking two different languages... and even with that, she'd avoid talking in person like the plague. It was on a vacation where we were constantly doing things and she needed to recharge. I didn't truly understand it at the time even though i told her i did.
I really did take the silence as a betrayal or possibly felt like she had given up on us. Or that she was not interested. But if that never happened I would never have looked into personalities.
My new knowledge has helped me notice my friends who are introverts that get dragged along to everything and talk with them better. It's changing so much for me. I wish more people knew this info.
MasterChief0093 The more you know. 😄 -cue the rainbows-
what an amazing woman. i'm watching this video for a class and i really relate to what she's saying. i don't feel so alone anymore.
I totally understand what she means about an introverts idea of happiness when she says it's something quieter. I think for a lot of us, it's learning & educating ourselves. I love discovering a new interest on my own, whether it's a new hobby, an author, or genre of music, etc rather than going out dancing or partying like an extroverts idea of fun or happiness. It's the little things we keep to ourselves that make us happy.
Listening to her is like listening to Phoebe from Friends!!! Lol... The same voice... How cool is that? :)
Isaac Newton: Truth is the offspring of silence and unbroken meditation
wow i got chills when she said to get into groups i would be horrified
silentsoul me every time in my honors class :')
You’re introvert then as me
I am loving this. In my everyday life I keep getting the message that I have to be more talkative, that I have to interact more, "have fun" (in the way an extrovert would define it) ... it is refreshing to hear somebody so succesful who did not have to change who she is in her core
I always enjoy and appreciate Susan. I loved the book. But I have some trouble with the notion that introverts use their alone time to "think" while extroverts use their social interacting to feel stimulated. Time spent in the cave is not necessarily "thinking" time. It may be creative; it may be spent learning (not cogitating); and it may be full of focus on something meaningful--but again, not to mull over things or solve a problem. I'm not saying that Susan describes introverts as primarily thinkers, but it does seem to be a tag assigned to them by others in the field.
I find this woman very attractive!
wow, "introversion and extroversion are...as core to our identities as our gender. therefore it's v important to understand where we truly fall on the introvert/extrovert spectrum.'
Great talk, many won't get the crux of the message. If I could have been there, i would have offered Susan a wide window and a nice silent coffee over the best view that was possible on the day. Introverts like us are so under-rated.
I'm an introvert and my grades are low because I don't participate in class discussions. :(
So what happened in the brain of a person who prefer an environment that have lower stimulant and higher stimulant aka what happened in an ambivert's brain?
Actually one on one convo would be something an introvert would be better at . An extrovert would be better in a group setting.
Introverts know more about why extrovert act like extrovert then extroverts do.
I found this immensely helpful! I'm an ambivert ENFP. I find my extroversion a hindrance and an embarrassment...to rely on a stimulant outside of myself feels disempowering. Looking to the outer world for validation can become an illness. Introverts don't need other people to have fun...they create whole worlds all in their minds. Introverts take very little from the world, but what they add speaks volumes.
hahahaah After 43:00 minutes the final question...that all the introverts are still wanting to know...cannot be answered......"How to shut the extrovert's up and let the introvert with the brains speak", without the the extrovert feeling it is a complete attack on thier inner being, thus the introvert cannot be bothered. :)
22:10 "we need to stop treating them (introverts) like something is wrong with them“ maybe exactly this is one part of the reason why they become great writers & thinkers ....
I WISHED SHE HAD A TH-cam CHANNEL :(
I'm ISFP and I'm told I'm creative. But yeah I'm very Fi and Se. I love music and being in a band.
Good speech, but it surprised me that she doesn't seem to know about IQ differences. Studies have showed that 60% of all gifted people (IQ 130+) are introverts, and 75% of all genius lvl IQ people (140+) are introverts. So they actually are smarter, or introversion is a byproduct of intelligence. Which isn't that surprising since they process more information and stimulation.
That IS interesting, though maybe she was referring to the fact that, as you have pointed out, not ALL gifted and geniuses are introverts; some have been extroverts.
Another fun fact, the same statistics could be applied to CEOs mentioned in all the Good to Great companies mentioned in Jim Collins' book. Most were introverts.
she covers this in her book, its a great read.
Lara1717171717 She did say that the I,q between both is pretty much the same
Could you link a source?
I'm late but can someone give some more advice about the last question?When i'm in a group of people and i'm trying to talk, often there's someone that interrupts me at the middle of my sentence, and i've tried the trick of rising my hand to make people know that i'm trying to talk but i'm always ignored.
I get you, it happens to me a lot too. I haven't really found a way besides trying to up the volume of my voice which I really hate to do.
Who else wants to erase that red mark on the screen behind her?
perfectionist would love to
LOL, too much stimulation when trying to listen. hehe
Exactly, Seclusion gives you piece of mind.
wow she's beautiful! thanks for speaking up for us introverts susan! :)
I'm a introvert. and it's hard
I'm an extrovert and it's hard.
We all want to be happy. That can be very different from success. Often success means endless work...
Yes indeed. People know NOTHING about introverts! THEIR bad!
Amazing speech! Got to know more interesting information about introverts and extroverts likewise.
A lietime of trying to deal with extroverts. Even this freudian slip echoes the morass of chaos.
I listened to this while i am in college right now and I love the amazing words she uses and shes an amazing lady I've never met her or heard of her! :)
Wow, what an eye-opener.
She is so amazing! I love what she said at the end about ephemeral beauty!
I am depelted..... I need to go home.
I think these states of being are not consistent or static for the rest of our lives, we change and adapt as we grow, as a kid i was an extravert but as a youth now am more of an introvert. Circumstances in life courses us to change our nature. And yes she is very attractive.
great speaker
This topic of introvert-extrovet is interesting but I hate that behind this is always the same shit: Success, success, success,... Horrible
it is biased kelman221 but thats just because for the longest time extraverts have been the only ones geting any positive attention. what introverts do u actually know who arent called weird or antisocial or something like that.
This was simply brilliant! Makes sense for me.
This was an amazing and insightful talk. I hate to point this out because it seems shallow... But she makes a smacking sound between some sentences.
But individuality is a recent phenomena of western society that has only been around for 200 years. The majority of people who lived have been more collective types of people.
How can individuality be a preference of the introvert if our society is tailored towards extroverts?
Is she sister to Feby from friends?
Why not appear to be extrovert (to make connections and money) but stay introvert internally?
That was delicious
I was super silent in school
What an incredible and interesting talk this is! It's always amazing to listen to talks that talk about your personality that is otherwise not really discussed widely by other speakers. Her TED Talk is quite good as well~
I never thought about this till you mentioned it. I could say that Phoebe the character in Friends (I don't know about the real Lisa Kudrow) is quite similar in terms that she seems to be an INFP personality type and that's what I could guess about Susan too. But anyway, I love what this woman is doing and yes she could be the real Phoebe in action (my favorite character in Friends btw). I am really happy about these talks and her book and the understanding that hopefully it will spark.
Less bullshit, more contemplation.
There must be many different level/spectrum of introversion too. That's why some introverts are shy, some are not. Oh, temperament and MBTI.
I don't like to talk about being introverted or extroverted. I think most people think that if you are extroverted you are happy, and that if you are introverted you are unhappy. Of course, that is far from true. Anyway, I very much am an introvert, and when I was far more shy than I am now I would often hear people talk about how quiet I was, and I hated it. This speaker is awesome, but I am going to stop listening, as I do not think this for me is a helpful topic.
I agree John. I hate labels. Many people are shy about meeting new people and possibly being judged but, after a glass of wine, they relax and are absolutely fine. I also know senior people who are terrified about public speaking to a peer group but in a group of people they know - they are comfortable and very effective. 'Be yourself tonight'but the best version of yourself.
29:23 the guy was clearly just commenting no trying to ask a question, as a specialist in the field she should've noticed it and not "socially humiliate" him as she kinda inadvertently did.
I am not in the room and My heart started beating real fast when she told the room they needed to share. As an introvert we don’t like these sort of surprises, hehe.
Introverts are very private people . They dont enjoy sharing their thoughts and beliefs
I am an HSP, notice the world is become noisier...technology, busses, streets, etc.
are u sure that the fish that were "extroverted" were not simply the male species ? and the ones who were looking for security - the female ones ?
Americans truly love self-limiting, pseudoscientific identity labels.
Thank you for saving my life ^_^
Her voice, gestures, and movements are like Lisa Kudrow.
These comments will need to be read later because I'll miss the whole talk because I'm interested in them
I like sitting in the dark
Exact same outfit as her Ted talk. No big deal, just odd.
That's why i Love children they are so pure they don't see flaws everything looks beautiful in their eyes.. I met a 5 year old today that was 20 everytime I meet her I'm amazed at how smart she is.. each child I talk too I see their brilliance... I feel so grateful they feel comfortable around me catching them today funky dancing in front of me for me to catch them and just Crack a smile at their joy. I am a true Introvert i need quiet contiplation.. I can also be an extrovert.. I am a joyful bubbly and let's live it.. I don't see the warning.. lol 😆 🤣 lol 😂 then I crash.. lol boom right into it. That's me I'm both.. it's necessary to me both sides. Susan i love the way you think your very smart and I like when someone can bring me to deep thinking and different things to think about.. never thought about what the key is to my power? Secret garden to inner riches! Brilliant... mine is ideas 💡 🙂 😌 😐 integrity honesty being real.. i do know this.. I have a lot of different skills I'm not always using. Lovely talk thank you.. 😊
All the introverts of the world like her.
@3 minutes: I felt so excited about my private, personal and profound experience from childhood that illustrates who I really am that I was going to post it here - but since it's not really what this is about, I'll withhold that.
Why were the comments turned off in that Jesse Ventura video?
Welcome to Finland introverts. This is a promised land for you.
It would have better if she had kept quiet... ;-)