Same! Best behaviour to work place and worst to home. Really struggling not to harbour bitterness and make each day a brand new day, no memories of yesterday.
I think my biggest issue currently in my marriage is my attitude towards my mother in law. My husband does well with putting us first; I’m just frustrated that she feels entitled and tries to control my actions.
In this episode you discussed a woman you met, who chose to stay with her husband after he was caught soliciting a male police officer. This woman says God told her she would be doubly blessed if she stayed with him and restored him. Can you help me understand where in scripture God tells women it is their responsibility to restore their husbands? Thank you!
My friend found her husband cheating on her. Leaving her culture and religion for him,she came and managed his culture and she became Christian for him. 21 years of love ,now she is hurt. Want to stay in marriage but Terribly hurt and also leave where there is no repentance and still blaming her for finding him cheating at her..what she can do now
My story is similar to the one you described. My husband was abusive, anger problems, athiest who belittled me and then caught with prostitutes that he was seeing for more than half our marriage. God offered me to leave, or to save his life. I chose to be obedient. God told me the night I found out to wash my husband's body. As much as i did not want to touch him, i did... and that act broke him and turned him to the Lord. He knew there must be a God because no way could i do that under my own power. He is now saved, spirit filled, leader in mens group, we are helping to counsel other couples and we have a marriage i could have only dreamed of. There is hope.
Jesus is so amazing! He blesses us beyond all measure, and it's clear when you let Him run with your life and watch what He does. Thank You Jesus for saving our lives and thank You for never failing in Your love. ❤
I’m standing and fighting for my marriage. Lisa your book has inspired me so much because it speaks to my fighting spirit. The problem was I fought with my husband instead of fighting the real enemy. The lord has told me to stay and that he will bless our future double fold. It has been the most painful thing I’ve endured and yet the most amazing because as I have surrendered to the Lord in this time of hardship He has completely renewed me and my relationship with Him. Now I’m praying for my husband to be restored because he has walked away from God, church and family and is isolating himself. Please pray with me for Holy Spirit to convict his heart. His name is Jonathan. Thank you
Praying with you. I was right there with you- fighting with my husband instead of fighting with the enemy. I reminded myself of the friend of Lisa’s- making a case for divorce in my head. But God is faithful - if we allow him to speak to us and listen- He will show us what to do.
I know this feeling because I’ve been there. But hang on to the promises of God. If He said to you what he said, HE WILL keep his promise in His timing. Continue your time with the Lord, in self renewal, in prayer and fasting. Let your husband and children see the changes in You. God will provide and follow through! Read Ezekiel 37 and Psalms 46:10. God Bless you, sister.
Lisa, u being as open with the obstacles u and john faced has motivated me to work on myself for my marriage;; i dont have married friends yet and so i outsource my discipleship from youtube couples;; thank u for sharing with us;; a healthy marriage seems more possible than ever before.
My wife has left of over 40 years left a year ago. We are still married and I believe God can reunite us. She left when I rescued my heroin addicted daughter who had been on the streets for 15 years and was ready to come home. No matter how long it takes I'll wait for my wife to join us. My daughter is doing great after a year living with me at home and working through her probation. Ptl!
I was violently physically abused cheated on and emotionally abused. I was told I was going to hell for divorcing. So thankful I listened to God not people. My husband nearly killed me multiple times. I’m remarried now to the most gentle masculine man and would walk through fire to stay. There’s a difference. Thanks for this great message.
I'm glad you got out. Jesus died on the cross for you. You aren't called to become physically crippled or die at the hands of your husband. I'm glad you are now in a safe place and truly loved.
How evil of an act... I don't understand, why men think they can abuse their power this way. these acts are repulsive. Only Jesus Christ can change these hearts.
Why is it every time it's a video of women wanting to save their marriage it's always yall women in the comment section? If this video is not about YOUR situation why comment? This is for us women who want to honor God and fight for our marriage the way God fought for us.
When my husband and I got married we both went into it saying that divorce is not an option. That is a fundamental value that we both share. Loyalty and keeping the vows we made to each other and to God are more important than our temporary feelings. We use our feelings to determine if we need to make changes to make things better. And because we know divorce isn't an option, we both put more effort into making our marriage great. When we have problems we figure out the root issue and come up with solutions. We prioritize our marriage over everything else. We have a date night almost every week. Even when we had almost no money. It might be having a picnic with food from home. Or just a coffee date if we couldn't afford to go out for dinner. It isn't about what we do. It's about the quality time. For our anniversary, all but one year we have gone on some sort of getaway. And we only didn't go anywhere that year because we had just bought our first house and were barely moved in. So we did a staycation instead which was really fun! For our getaways, we used groupon deals. We found cheap places. Whatever we could afford at the time. We used tax return money for it or saved up. Because that time is important. To relax and reconnect.
@lh485 Sorry, I'm not trying to be mean but I really can't understand what you are trying to say with your comment. I'm not sure if English isn't your first language? And if that's the case it's okay. English is really challenging, and my mom's third language was English.
@@bunny_0288 I think she's saying people in the comments are still in the process to have a good relantioship or are in a bad relantioship. Then you're the only one who's sharing a good marriage. English is also my second language. Haha I don't know if you will understand my words.
As a child from a household of divorce Lisa's story of her parents divorce is similar to mine. And my dad quickly remarried and there was a lot I saw in that marriage too. As a child I just stopped trying and as a teenager I held a lot of anger. Anger I couldn't confront until now in my 30's. As a young adult I had no direction and no plan. But God is amazing. He took a broken angry girl from a broken household with pain in her heart and made her into a God-loving, praying, bible reading warrior. I'm not where I'd like to be, but I'm not where I used to be. And listening to solid advice about what a biblical marriage looks like, I hope one day if marriage will happen, I can take that advice.
Challenges in relationships are part of the journey, but there’s always a way to move forward. My own marriage had significant hurdles, but with the right help, my wife and I overcame them and grew stronger. With effort and cooperation, solutions can be found. Keep your hope-solutions are within reach.
I’m facing major problems in my relationship and can't imagine losing her. I love and miss her greatly and am prepared to do whatever is necessary to have her return. I’d be deeply grateful for any advice or guidance you can offer.
Letting someone you deeply care for go is always difficult, but in my scenario, I was fortunate to have the counsel of a spiritual mentor who preserved the unity of my marriage. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
. I'm thankful for this guidance. I'll immediately search for her online. I appreciate it. I'm hopeful that adopting this strategy will also bring about positive changes for me; I miss her deeply.
I never wanted to get married until I became a Christian in 2020. My BF of 9 years and the father to my kids finally proposed and we’ve been married for 1 year and it’s been the hardest part of our relationship. Nothing but problems since we got married. But I know the enemy hates marriage and I know God is up to something ❤
Thank you ladies for this!!! Just this morning my thoughts to God was, “Father l, every time I look on TH-cam, I feel like everything is pointing to separation/divorce. I just want to see something different please!” And here is this video today!! God is so amazing 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 Thank you for your obedience ladies. God bless you all!!
I’m not married yet but you share so much invaluable wisdom and advice. Thank you for your content ❤️ I shared with my sisters who are married. I hope they can learn as much as I have from you.
I’ve watched this twice because there is soooo many jams in the episode that I need to watched twice to catch them all, Lisa thank you, you have spoken so honestly it was so refreshing to hear someone in a leadership role being so open about their marriage and the obstacles that you have faced, from the bottom of my heart I can not stand people that try’s to keep an aparece of perfection while we all burn in pain and shame with no real guidance.
Thank you for giving me the courage to dream again in my marriage. My dreams died long ago and I was willing to stay and have a mediocre marriage. But thank you for inspiring me to take power back and not wait on him to change first. Thank you ❤
I also boils down to identity. I find that when I just saw myself as a wife, I felt powerless Understanding I'm a person, a child of God etc has helped a great deal. When I feel abandoned ,as a child of God, I look up to God for comfort . But when I just saw myself as a just wife, it hurt so much more.
You forgot about psychological abuse. It doesn't have to be sexual or physical abuse, to be abuse. Reactive abuse from narcissistic abuse, is the worst form of psychological torture. If my parents divorced when i was a child, that would have saved me a life of extreme emotional pain and suffering. Staying with a psychologically abusive partner is NOT helping the kids. To leave such a monster would have been protecting your kids. My siblings and I were all sacrificed, bcuz my mother never had the "heart" to leave him. He was always more important than our emotional and mental health. Narcissistic abuse IS torture. Staying with a narc will have grave consequences for the children involved. I hate it how it's always overlooked.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I'm in the middle of divorce with my narsissistic husband. Even after all the narsissistic abuse I still feel very guilty about this choice. But your comment makes me realize that this will save my 1 year old son a life of abuse and will give him a chance to grow up in a safety.
@@DorothyCorner-g7m YES PLEASE! You and Your Son must be protected and if he is NOT protecting you both and your heart ♥ GOD will, WHEN you are free from this abuse!
@@JustLex98 I am so sorry you had to go through that -- Yes! Bullies corner people! Bullies are abusive. Mature individuals discuss and unpack their concerns in a manner where no one feels threatened! You’re going to need to do a deep dive and research on narcissistic abuse. Because if your husband allowed his family /relatives and the church to corner you, and he didn’t protect you?! This isn’t a good sign. You need to contact your family and tell them what happened. That’s my suggestion.🙏🏼🥰🙏🏼
I have been married to my husband for a little over a year. This is my first marriage and his second. This gives me so much hope and a fighting spirit to not “give up” just because we have conflicts and triggers with eachother - it truly feels like a constant mirror being held up to one another of our greatest gifts and greatest flaws. Each time we move through conflict and into repair, we feel more bonded and sealed in covenant than ever. It’s such a beautiful unfolding of our hearts that have become one.
@@Kat-fw5jono it’s not concerning, every couple is different. As long as they make the Lord the center of their marriage and abide in Him, nothing is impossible!
Hi Lisa, thank you for sharing the plate story. I love your fight for female podcast and appreciate how real you are and what you are sharing is very important.
I am incredibly encouraged by this message. I am post-divorce. My parents are also divorced and I see how many lies I believed. This message gives hope. Thank you ❤️
I am one of those that God gave an option to, that I could pray for my husband and stay faithful, even when he wasn’t, or I could be at peace moving on with a divorce. I knew He was telling me that remaining faithful would have the greater blessing. So I am over a year into interceding on my husband’s behalf, and for our marriage. Restoration is a work that God has to do, and I’m waiting for how He’s going to work all this out. In the meantime, I have learned God’s faithfulness through everything. I think that is part of the blessing. 💜
Yes, I know. I FINALLY filed about a year ago. He was lying to me from day one. After being out on Ashley Madison, we lost all of our Christian friends. My life was a hell-hole. I haven't been a church goer for years. He was fired from jobs and was emotionally and financially abusive, even forging my signature on a $2,000 check. I wish I had never even met him.
God is having me listen to this this morning 🙏🏾 thank you for saying everything you did it has hit home like no other. I have been doing my marriage and my husband so wrong. I am just focused on all his wrongs instead of lifting him up with all the rights and ways he does take care of me and our children ❤✝️
Hi Lisa, thank you so much for being honest and vulnerable sharing things you've done that did not help because I am in the same situation and hearing you gives me hope that our marriage could turn around if I start focusing my mind and thoughts on Jesus. This message has been so helpful and needed. In churches this topic is nearly not mentioned at all and I can see that the enemy is at its peak fighting to destroy marriages.
Wow this was brilliant. Lisa is a gem. I love her ideas to hope for better with her husband, and that she has experienced different versions of him and some are her favorite. Very relatable.
As a Christian myself, I always thought divorce was never an option when I married my Christian wife. But later she cheated with a guy in the church whom recently divorced his wife as he claims he fell out of love, and his parent are long time church leaders. I found out and she decided to divorce me to go with him, while the pastor and his parent still deny they have committed adultery, simply because they believe the golden child of theirs wouldn't do such atrocious thing, and the pastor wouldn't want to rock the boat and seek to preserve the status quo. As much I wanted to reconcile and work things out, she has no remorse, didn't think she is in the wrong and insisted on filing the divorce. Some church friends even said there might be some things I did to her or the way I behave have pushed her towards cheating - typical victim blaming, so I decided not to talk to them anymore and actively looking into moving to a new city and away from the church that turned a blind eye to this ordeal. They completely ignore the teaching from Matthew 19 and I don't think I would ever trust them again.
@@jacqimcgarry4073 I got huge breakthroughs in marriage by fasting. Look into it. Also look into deliverance ministries. Certain things don’t change unless a person is delivered. I am speaking from my own experience. Bless you ❤
I have struggled with pride also. Always blaming my husband instead of looking inward at what needs to change in me. It’s so much easier to see the other persons faults.
You have no idea how much of a blessing this has been to me. I adore your story, you have given me such invaluable inspiration for the hope of my marriage. Time to put in the work and look towards God for my fulfillment. God bless you!
Thank you for addressing this. I am going through a divorce because of child abuse and adultery on my ex spouse’s part. I still hold guilt for ending that marriage, but it did not honor God.
So good!! Thank you for pouring this out to us all- we are blessed to hear this and glean from you Lisa! Can't wait to see you again hopefully soon- a mercy culture member! We love you at MC!
My advice is make sure you are completely delivered and your future husband too. See how his father treats his mother. Look closely and not just in happy setting. There are bondages and curses and family and if not dealt with it can come later
Thank you for this message. God helped me understand that my marriage is a covenant and that He is the head. Our marriage is not without our struggles and issues, but, God is always faithful, and yes , we need to fight together for each other...so true Lisa, God first and see Him work!
Lisa, I am overjoyed to have stumbled upon you! After becoming a Christian in 2001, “Under Cover” was the very first book I read in my walk and it was foundational in changing my life. What an honor to now be able to follow the amazing wife of that author!
Coming up on 11 years in December and no matter how I try, it feels hopeless. I am trying to keep my gaze on Jesus, but every day feels like a minefield. Jesus, please help us! 💔💔💔💔💔💔
I feel the same way. No matter how hard I try, it seems like I will never do or be enough to be a priority. My tears and emotional pain are simply "drama" in his eyes.
@@landerosee5264 I'm so sorry you're struggling and hurting. I've been married for 14 years, and like she said in the video I do feel like I am doing marriage well. I'd like to offer some encouragement and some lessons that God has taught me. 1. It is not my husband's job to make me happy. It's my job. I find my happiness by spending time with the Lord, spending time with people I love and care about, consuming positive and encouraging content, working out, having hobbies, etc. When I fill my life with good things it takes the pressure off of him needing to fill that up. Think about when you met him. Are there things you have stopped doing that you used to love? Does your life revolve around him? 2. I am not responsible for anyone else's behavior except my own. Meaning I will try my best to be kind and loving regardless of other people's actions. I am far from perfect with this, but just by making an effort and doing this the majority of the time it has made a huge impact. I am only accountable for my own behavior and other people are accountable for theirs. I do my best to be a good wife because that is what God has called me to be. I try my best to submit to my husband and to make his life better and more peaceful. To build my house up instead of tearing it down. I pray for my husband. I go to God if my husband hurts my feelings or if something is bothering me instead of creating a big fight. I realized a lot of the conflict in our marriage was me starting arguments because my feelings were hurt. And instead of expressing hurt, it came out as anger. 3. Thinking of my husband and I as a team working against whatever problem we may have. It's us against the problem. Not us against each other. We are not adversaries. We are teammates. And sometimes we disagree, but we have the same goal. We want a happy marriage. 4. Forgiveness. Love keeps no record of wrongs. And this is a tough one. It's hard to forgive and not bring up all the times he has screwed up or hurt you. But how would it feel if God did that to us? If God held all of our mistakes and offenses against us? I try and remind myself of this when the temptation to bring up the past comes up. And again I'm not perfect. My marriage isn't perfect. But it is happy. And I don't know your dynamic at all, but are you always waiting for him to plan things? I've learned that sometimes I need to be the one to plan something romantic. And sometimes when you start doing the right thing and behaving how you want to be treated, things start getting better. It's like in 2 Peter (I think) where it talks about wives winning over their unbelieving husbands without a word. Simply with their actions. Our attitudes, actions, and behaviors can be a positive or a negative influence in our homes. At the end of the day you can't change him. You can only change yourself. But amazing things can happen when you do that. When you let go of your own pride and your own hurt and learn to love the way Jesus did. And it's hard and you will mess up, we all do. But it really does make a difference.
The hard part for me is letting go of the expectation of him to not be fallen. Which shows my lack of compassion… and actually shows my in ability to Love as well. Yes… he does this this and this and probably 30 other things and yes, it hurts and yes, I’m crying… but am I crying because his brokenness and lack of going to God is falling on me? Then that is sad and I should feel sad for my man and his distance from God. God is helping me realize that this is my issue as well and that my mindset is wrong towards my man and something God is trying to renew in me and maybe help me see that my expectations are not real and need to be surrendered(which is a wrestle as it hurts to let go of them)…. And He wants to give me that realness by listening to Him and connecting with Him first… He has to renew my mind and give me the ability to Love unconditionally. That’s where my freedom and peace will be Is letting go of expectations because God’s expectations are the only ones that really matter and I am start to understand that this is our surrender as Christian women… letting go of what we think our man should be and letting God renew our minds to Love unconditionally, as He does towards us when we fall short towards Him,… Otherwise I’m just as guilty as my man… cuz not Loving is not Loving. Almost like Abraham had to lay his son in the alter- we have to lay our view of what our man should be on the alter and give that to God and let God raise him up in His timing to His expectations and THEN we will have the Love from our man that we’ve really deep down been searching for… but we have to let go of our view and let God implant His view into our minds….. aaaand it hurts.. lol…. But I do see that the more steps I take towards listening to God here and surrendering the more I am healed and the more peace I have and connection with my Heavenly Father.. which is the first Goal, right? It’s been a wrestle for me. So I’ve been wrestling with God to give me the ability to Love unconditionally. And I agree with Lisa… abuse and affairs are a factor that changes whether one should stay or not for sure… and God would guide one there too… but if this isn’t the case… then my only goal should be to seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness… then all these things will be added to me and I will have the peace that passes all understanding. I will never find true peace in my man. I need to be searching for Him not him. And I’m saying this after many tears and much sadness of being distanced and vented on by him. This is his brokenness. Am I going to choose to Love because that is what God requires of me and what is best for my soul and for healing…? Or am I going to return evil for evil? Am I going to treat him the way that he treated me? If I only love those who love me than I am no different. If my Love is conditional than this is a sign that I, too, need the Heavenly Physician’s Power working in my mind…. Which then would enable me to have compassion on my man’s weakness rather than looking down on him and me feeling like a victim. It sorta makes us on the same page as we both need a Savior cuz not Loving is not Loving… even if we are doing it differently. Sorry for the length… but honestly, I needed to hear it along with whoever else might. Love you ladies and praying for God true peace and strength in our lives. ❤
Ask the Lord for wisdom, you're responsible to your husband not for him. I don't understand why so many Christians believe that they have to stay in a marriage when the other person doesn't take responsibility.
I want a divorce, I married a full on narcissist, I ignored so many red flags, I have tired working through it but it's like head butting a brick wall. It's been a total nightmare from day one, I've had zero peace since we've been together, his contempt for me is off the hook, he'll start fights with me over things he thinks im thinking, i can literally be agreeing with him and he will flip the script and start arguing the other side. I'm happy to stay single for the rest of my life, it'll be 100% better than this.
I will be praying for you as well. God is able! Please Pray. Ask the Lord to give you the answer and direction. Don't do anything until you hear from Him! He will respond!
PLEASE try the following: Get yourself somewhere where you can have REALLY quiet. I mean the least amount of "outside noise" as possible! Cryl out to God in your spirit (and out loud if necessary!) Ask Him for wisdom. Ask Him for discernment. Ask Him for revelation and insight. Then sit quietly and LISTEN to what He tells you AND WRITE IT IN A JOURNAL! Do this and keep doing it for at least 2 weeks! After the two weeks, take a good long look at your marriage. Have things changed? Reread your journal entries and look at how God is working. It works! Keep listening to Him. Keep journaling. I can not pretend to know what God has planned for your marriage, but this will also help YOU and your frame of mind in general. God be with you and God bless you. I'll pray!
It’s ok that you don’t know what to do- I felt that way for months until a few weeks ago when I decided to really give it to God this time and let go off my pride. I had reasons to divorce and I am sure you do too but is that Gods best ? He is a retiring God. I’ll be praying for you. ❤
I felt thar way at times until I heard that love is an action word- you ha e to choose to love - i had to see my husband the way God sees him. I worked on my bad habits that I didn't realize at 1st and also prayed alot in the Spirit- God helped w bitterness and anger in my heart and did lots of changes in my husband- wow w God all things are possible. Say blessings over ur husband and say outloud ur vows and ask God to work on his heart
Thank you Lisa for being transparent and demonstrating to uphold the covenant of marriage to work through it, and also discouraging divorce because the only place adultery is mentioned is Matthew, when God speaks to the Hebrews, everywhere else is said it is not. Also I appreciate how you said we have to look at ourselves instead of looking at our spouse and blaming them. We need to grow for God's Glory and to help others, like you are. Thank you Lisa.
But sometimes a woman can't. I stayed for over 2 decades. I shouldn't have. He is still lying to me. He doesn't have any respect for me and told me I needed to provide for myself.
Hey Jennifer, I get what you mean. I just recently got separated from my husband but not by choice. I was being forced out of the house by him and his family. He wasn’t and isn’t an ideal husband but I forgave him because I need peace and to have God work on me. God is our vindicator! God can do the job in changing others, let him do his job! I have found God since the separation and then God led me to Joyce Meyer and her videos can answer most of your questions. I found out I needed to change and it’s helped me a lot during these circumstances.
I know it’s hard at times but in order for you to get that inner peace you need and learn to walk the ways God wants you to walk and trust me you will feel that revelation and if next time someone lies or does or says something hurtful, it won’t bother you. I just give it to God because I have been battling with the demon for many years in my marriage and realized it only made me bitter. We fight and all it does is mess things up for ourselves.
@@rebeccaj4638 God is a vindicator. My former in laws contributed to him cheating and leaving the marriage. His whole family has reaped a whirlwind of calamity. His life has faltered. Was it hard for me? Yes I was broke and bankrupt from being an at home mom. But God has blessed me. He will make them your footstool one day. They literally act afraid of me now because they know God covers me.
Saving your marriage and your spouses life is very humbling. God steps in and does the unimaginable. What a testimony!! I separated myself from friends who are divorced because they are so bitter, jealous and needy. I got to protect my marriage and be an example for my married daughter.
43 years married here, through the hard, bad, good and great times. I so needed to hear this today! I ran into another ‘Never do this around my husband’ moment last night. It shocked me, since I haven’t been confronted with my husband’s anger for a couple of years. Crying out to the Lord for me, handing him over to God’s care is how we have made it through. I have listened to John, been to conferences, read his books for decades. Just yesterday, as a woman, and wife I thought I need to hear Lisa’s side of being married to a strong driven man. Then last night me and my man have a fight. God’s timing is perfect. Thank you Lisa for being frank, honest and biblically bound.
Thank you for sharing this wisdom and insight. As I consider a first marriage and hear my mother’s less than optimistic words, your talks always bring me back to feeling and relying on God’s love and example. Thank you ❤
My husband has become the upgrade. I almost divorced him, but Jesus made him new. It was a horrible spiritual battle to get to know each other and fight for a life together and not fight with each other. 21 years of marriage and we know, different levels require different strength, we are in it until the end if God is the center of our relationship.
Just remember this you're not responsible for him if he doesn't take responsibility. Walk away my friend. I know it's easier said than done but I think God hates more for us to stay in abusive relationship then divorce.
I am... I've been silenced. He's lied...I've tired of being the understanding wife. We've gone hungry, gone without electricity and running water. He saud in 2017 he didn't believe anymore. I havalwzys felt something was missing....but i kept thinking it's me..I just gotta be more, do more, be more. Our children are now grown. I do have a special needs daughter. I want us to experience a home where they feel emotionally safe, including me. My husband is an alcoholic..gaslights and deflects. I will longer protect his behavior. 31 years....and my eyes were just opened that this type of abuse has been happening for years. I didn't realize Financial abuse was a thing. If my leaving him brings him back to the Lord, I'm willing to let him go. I don't want a divorce..but I'm worthy of being loved, cherished ....validated...God is showing He is all that to me.
One of the best things that was said to me that took the scary out of it was that a separation didn't have to be permanent. Sometimes it's a wake up call, or just time for you to work on yourself and realize how sideways things have gotten. It's an opportunity to see truth without the filter of your everyday life. I had a friend who was separated 9 months and then they reconciled because he found God after she did. It's still hard, but not nearly as bad as it was. They are still working on it.
We marry for our parents, stay married for the church. This suffering has to stop and it’s usually the women and children suffering the most. If the husband is unwilling to accept his part and change his heart and behavior, she has nothing more she can do but pray!
@christinamckinney2370 we married out of obedience to God. I would've opted for premarital counseling and individual therapy. I was expecting our 2nd child when we came to know the Lord. I am by far not perfect...but then doing life I always had my husband's vest interest at heart. I'm uncovering so many crazy things...our kids are mostly grown....our youngest is 19 ....hasn't made the best choices. I've laid all our children and grandchildren....my husband and myself at God's feet. I know i can only allow Gid to work on me. Everyone has freewill. I have to do what's God's best. And He is my husband. My vlidator, my confidence. My comforter, my safe place, my redeemer. I chose to raise my kids And I worked dome years....I'm regretting some of my choices...and I've repented. O have even asked my children for forgiveness. I sense so much pride in my husband, he has 0 remorse for all the hurt and pain he's caused. When is enough..enough?
40 years of marriage, and Im still working on this thing. We've had highs and lows, and marriage is HARD simply because we are often self-centered instead of Jesus. Marriage is like a rock tumbler. We are in it together, and are becoming smoother and more beautiful because of it. I want to enjoy my marriage, not just survive it. One day at a time. If we didn't stay together, we wouldn't be enjoying the huge INTACT family we do now. All praise to God.🙌
My best friend‘s wife long ago stopped being a participant in her marriage, but I think she prides herself in not being divorced. 32 years married with at least the last dozen years being horrible. Based on their ages, this could go on another 20 years. 😢 Just last week her brother’s 20 some year marriage came to an end. Again, years of sadness and anger. 😢
This is soooo encouraging!! I praise the Lord for you guys!! I've been in a very dark season of life but I know the Lord wants to do something NEW and beautiful out of this season!! Thank you so much for surrenderring to Jesus!! I bless your lives and your families in Jesus name ❤
22:53 exactly us right now! But once that moment happened. It’s not showing change with our dynamic going forward. I am still pleading the throne for us!!❤…
Being able to pray in the spirit(tongues)really helps. It’s a marriage saver for many. I have been married for over 40 years. I know it helps me and my wife. God did tell me she was His choice for me. Divorce is also a spirit like fear,anger,lust etc. It goes from person to person. Also John Bevere said a pastor told him once his church grew like it did because he taught the people to live for eternity. People especially church leaders need to have the same mindset concerning marriage. Divorce hurts people and families, church members. Should be a last resort. My friend at church that got married the same time as I did is also still married to his wife. We were all around 23 years old. Now going on 64 years old. No infidelities, no separations among us. We all are filled with the Holy Ghost speaking in tongues. It hasn’t been all smooth, but we kept going and things got better and great. This has been repeated many times over.
I’m not leaving. I only asked that we go to therapy. He refuses to just go to therapy. He is filing for divorce for unbiblical reasons. He certainly has narcissistic traits…but even in that, I have been fighting for us to go to counseling and have always communicated that I am open to reconciliation. He wants to divorce and never speak again. He claims to be a believer but does not function as one. I have prayed and the Lord has shown me that this is a “when an unbeliever leaves, let him leave. For God has called you to live in peace.” situation. By His grace, we don’t have children. I have no choice but to let him leave. I am at peace and I thank Christ ❤
For anyone that is finding themselves in the difficult season of infidelity . I want to say to you that God is good!!! Firstly peoples' behaviour is not a reflection of you, it is a reflection of them. We are all more broken than we would like to be and carry our unhealed past into our future. I know it is hard and I know it is painful, but God is still so good. In the midst of all the brokenness He whispers and He restores. I am walking this road for a second time (with the same husband) and God has spoken to me in such profound ways. He has asked me to stay because He is busy working. God has been so present and so faithful to me in the midst of all of this. Sometimes we only become aware of how our past is affecting us in the present, when these "terrible" things happen. Lean into God!!!
A lot of people who've experienced a divorce have done what they believed was right according to Scripture but you can't decide for another person how they'll respond. Also, parents who stay married can be just as destructive as those who divorce. It depends on a lot of things, mostly where God is in the whole thing.
God's will is his word.nt situations we go thru. We are to submit to the word per marriage and love one another as christ loved the church. If christ can love u whose writing with all ur sins humble ur self and love ur spouse with the same love he gives you. Situations are nt created by God but by the devil.
I believe that too. My kids might not even want to get married or at least not for a long while. They didn't see a loving marriage. 💔 My daughter has never dated and I think she is afraid to.
“Rather than being so acquainted with disappointment, I’m gonna believe that I can dream again”. Thank you for this incredible video! I was feeling like this recently, and now know that I need to turn to the Lord and that He is enough!
Oh Lisa...You are one strong woman! You know how much I love listening to you... and everytime I do, you give me one more reason to continue the fight. God bless you and your beautiful family!! Love you all.❤ Nithya from India.
I fought for my marriage for 15 years. I nearly lost my mind. I filed for divorce and suffered with guilt and anxiety for five years. I wanted to end my life. God brought me through all of it. I’m on the other side. God blessed my two grown kids who serve the Lord, drug and alcohol free 🙌🙏
I'm a newlywed and I'm already going through it. Difference in love languages, husband doesn't touch me, kiss me, or hug me almost ever. Nothing of that sort even before intimacy. Speaks harshly, curses at me and hurls insults whenever he's angry, namecalls, doesn't help with domestic chores, never compliments me, didn't even tell me I was beautiful on our wedding day, threatens divorce every argument. Supposed to be christian.. why I first fell in love with him and now I don't think he's picked up his bible in months and certainly see no good fruit. I've been further from God now. I feel so lonely. I just want to feel loved and treasured. Divorce isn't an option for me but I just feel sad all the time and have no confidence. I can't talk to anyone about my feelings either. I pray God works in us and gives us a testimony because I don't want to and won't give up..
I was talking to a guy who wanted a wife so bad. He was interested in me but God kept silent when I asked him if this guy was the one and then SHOWED me through his actions that he wasn’t. This guy claimed to be a “Christian” but I say there is a difference between a Christian man and a Man of God! It seems that this guy that you’re with was pretending to be someone that he’s not to get someone he shouldn’t have even pursued. You deserve better than this. Really seek God for what He needs you to do and pay close attention. It simply sounds to me that he doesn’t truly have a relationship with God. There are also spirits behind this as well. Just putting in what came to my mind as I read this. I’m sorry about what you’re going through, I’ll be praying for you ❤
@ When I met him he was reading the word every single day, constantly talking about God, leading Bible studies and teaching me things I didn’t even know about the Bible. He’s faith made me want to step up my faith. I fell in love with got he pursued God. On top of that he’d compliment me and was affectionate and then once he moved to Florida he switched up. I’m married to him so there’s not much I can do other than pray. I know there’s spiritual warfare behind it. I just stopped going to war which I shouldn’t have.
Sounds like a narcissistic personality. Look up Kris Reece's videos. She fell into a similar thing. You can talk to someone. You MUST talk to someone, because that's the only touch you'll have with reality. Before he cows you into not seeking counseling or belittling you into thinking there's something wrong with you, you MUST talk to someone. If you hear God that's a good place to start, but it helps to have God speak through counselors sometimes too. And it's worth looking into your own life, if there's any parental similarities in your family, there's a reason why you were attracted to this guy. We seek out what's familiar even if it doesn't look familiar at first.
@@QueenDaestrai resonate with you so much! Been separated for almost a year now from a similar personality in my so called "Christian" husband. He flirts w/ other women when it bothers me then gaslights me that I am too sensitive, jealous and needy. Does not have any affection, no hugs, kisses, no cuddles. Nothing. Stopped the affection soon after marriage. He is super smart and charming. He's teaching children sunday school at another church not to serve God, but to fish and prey upon another woman with a gentle spirit to take care of him. He smear campaigned me and makes me lose all hope in the church. People take his side bc he makes money and has the charm and big ego. Anyway, I pray God protect you and guide you to put your faith in Jesus, not man to be your true hope and give you the unconditional love you deserve and seeking..only He can make you whole and lift your confidence back up. You are loved and lovable, you are the daughter of the most High King. Not the lies your "husband" says of you. There is definitely evil spirits your husband is allowing to enter and its manifestation is name calling and abusive behaviour towards you. Pray the holy spirit soften his heart and cleanse him from unclean spirits so he is able to recognize his unChristlike behaviour towards you. Seek a therapist and biblical counsellor to help repair your heart and make you strong in the Lord. I pray God give you peace and covers you with His love. May he give you wisdom to know what to do in your season. God is not honoured if this unbelieving husband is abusing His daughter emotionally or psychologically. Get somewhere safe and pray over yourself and husband for your own change and his. Ask God to help you get through. He will... keep up the good fight and press on. God is with you and loves you so much!!
@ thank you for this thoughtful comment. I agree there are spirits at work. I’m not saying I’ve been perfect- I have my own issues too but I know this isn’t who he’s supposed to be. Especially after prophetic words that have been spoken over him and all the positive characteristics he does have as well. To be quite honest, things have actually improved from where they were. At least though it seems. Right now I know God needs to help me with bitterness and anger because it causes me to distance myself from Him too. I know it’s definitely not helping anything. And I need to pray more again too. I know Jesus is the only one who can help me or change things.
You are such a blessing Lisa, thank you for your humility, openness, all of your conversations with husband, sons, daughter in law... Each discussion is a blessing and helpful. May God bless your mariage, family and ministry 🙏
My parents were married for a lifetime and it was a horrible abusive train wreck until dad died. I remember mom being proud she didn't divorce and stayed with him. I was so mad and disgusted because she had no idea how much their abuse for each other destroyed the life of their 4 kids. I still struggle with the consequences of the devastation they left behind in many ways. I don't see how God could take pleasure in that at all. They were hardworking and generous, but everything else was demonic from the pit of hell. We had every form of abuse in our home under the sun. If it wasn't for the grace of God, we didn't wind up in mental institutions... but the disfunction is still there for all of us....
I remember when my dad was saying he was leaving my Mom. Me and my sister were crying and saying No..where will you go? He had been a pastor til i was 5 or 6. He didnt leave. Its hard to understand when my parents love The Lord. Financial strain/ working their jobs..i started to fail in some classes. My parents were mad at me. My Dad preached occasionally in other towns. I knew my Mom had to do lots bc Dad helped w ministry. I felt that tension. Kids dont know how to deal w that.
I wish my mum spoke English so I could share this with her, my parents marriage has been going bad for years, but thank God they are still married, I believe God will restore them
How I wish I had this kind of counsel 10 years ago. I take responsibility for divorcing my husband of 21 years- I just did not have the best counsel from my pastors. I asked my pastors for years for help and they really just pushed my ex-husband aside because i was in ministry and he was not. Yes my ex-husband was unfaithful, but in retrospect I was too- I chose ministry and controlling pastors. I believed and was led by individuals that should have never led a church.
Af the 17 year mark during a conversation he looked me in the eye and said, “You weren’t supposed to say yes…” All of the puzzle pieces finally fell together. How do you continue to fight for something that just isn’t there….you don’t!
Well I fought long and hard with a man that refused to ever put any effort into the marriage. Towards the end he was having several affairs and telling me what he was doing with them. He renounced God and told me he would Never repent. I released him. He is now married to his mistress and his life is not what he thought it would be. I tried. And I refuse to put that type of effort into another man ever again
Thanks LISA AND FAMILY. I COULD NOT AGREE WITH YOU MORE. marriage has many challenges that need to be caught in The Spirit of Christ not in the ways of the world were sin is overlooked. Thanks to Jesus we have our Example of truth kindness and love. Let’s all keep being The Light of encouragement. You are wonderful. Thanks again⭐️❤️🙏🕊
I’m going through a separation due to much conflict going on in home I felt like we both need this little moment to reflect and understand. I pray my husband finds a way to forgive as I have so many times. We just had small child he’s 1 and another on the way I’m 16 weeks pregnant, I pray God is able to restore my marriage. In this moments alone I plan truly find myself with God and growing a strong relationship with him. Please pray for us Alexis and Eduardo ❤
I hope that you will read this massage. GOD is working with my husband and I after destroying our marriage, and I just wanted to let you know that this massage was a great help for me I really appreciate all that work you and your family put into all your videos. I am Hispanic from Chicago and i try to watch most of your family videos ❤
This is such an awesome video and encouragement! I'm trying to pray and figure out Christian content creation, and my dream is to leave my target audience walking away and wanting to lean into God. This was a beautiful example of this! Thank you for trusting God and impacting everyone you do!
What's the biggest challenge you've faced in your marriage?
Being married to someone who is unreliable and has trouble truth-telling. Only Jesus sustains us.
Same! Best behaviour to work place and worst to home. Really struggling not to harbour bitterness and make each day a brand new day, no memories of yesterday.
I think my biggest issue currently in my marriage is my attitude towards my mother in law. My husband does well with putting us first; I’m just frustrated that she feels entitled and tries to control my actions.
In this episode you discussed a woman you met, who chose to stay with her husband after he was caught soliciting a male police officer. This woman says God told her she would be doubly blessed if she stayed with him and restored him. Can you help me understand where in scripture God tells women it is their responsibility to restore their husbands? Thank you!
My friend found her husband cheating on her. Leaving her culture and religion for him,she came and managed his culture and she became Christian for him. 21 years of love ,now she is hurt. Want to stay in marriage but Terribly hurt and also leave where there is no repentance and still blaming her for finding him cheating at her..what she can do now
My story is similar to the one you described. My husband was abusive, anger problems, athiest who belittled me and then caught with prostitutes that he was seeing for more than half our marriage. God offered me to leave, or to save his life. I chose to be obedient. God told me the night I found out to wash my husband's body. As much as i did not want to touch him, i did... and that act broke him and turned him to the Lord. He knew there must be a God because no way could i do that under my own power. He is now saved, spirit filled, leader in mens group, we are helping to counsel other couples and we have a marriage i could have only dreamed of. There is hope.
Wow this is such a powerful testimony!
Amen 🙏
Jesus is so amazing! He blesses us beyond all measure, and it's clear when you let Him run with your life and watch what He does.
Thank You Jesus for saving our lives and thank You for never failing in Your love. ❤
Oh my goodness your post made me cry…all glory to God!
With man this is impossible bit with God ALL things are possible 🙌🙌
I’m standing and fighting for my marriage. Lisa your book has inspired me so much because it speaks to my fighting spirit. The problem was I fought with my husband instead of fighting the real enemy. The lord has told me to stay and that he will bless our future double fold. It has been the most painful thing I’ve endured and yet the most amazing because as I have surrendered to the Lord in this time of hardship He has completely renewed me and my relationship with Him. Now I’m praying for my husband to be restored because he has walked away from God, church and family and is isolating himself. Please pray with me for Holy Spirit to convict his heart. His name is Jonathan. Thank you
Praying with you. I was right there with you- fighting with my husband instead of fighting with the enemy. I reminded myself of the friend of Lisa’s- making a case for divorce in my head. But God is faithful - if we allow him to speak to us and listen- He will show us what to do.
I know this feeling because I’ve been there. But hang on to the promises of God. If He said to you what he said, HE WILL keep his promise in His timing. Continue your time with the Lord, in self renewal, in prayer and fasting. Let your husband and children see the changes in You. God will provide and follow through! Read Ezekiel 37 and Psalms 46:10. God Bless you, sister.
Lisa, u being as open with the obstacles u and john faced has motivated me to work on myself for my marriage;; i dont have married friends yet and so i outsource my discipleship from youtube couples;; thank u for sharing with us;; a healthy marriage seems more possible than ever before.
My wife has left of over 40 years left a year ago. We are still married and I believe God can reunite us. She left when I rescued my heroin addicted daughter who had been on the streets for 15 years and was ready to come home. No matter how long it takes I'll wait for my wife to join us. My daughter is doing great after a year living with me at home and working through her probation. Ptl!
Praying and standing with you! Don’t give up!
I was violently physically abused cheated on and emotionally abused. I was told I was going to hell for divorcing. So thankful I listened to God not people. My husband nearly killed me multiple times. I’m remarried now to the most gentle masculine man and would walk through fire to stay. There’s a difference. Thanks for this great message.
I'm glad you got out. Jesus died on the cross for you. You aren't called to become physically crippled or die at the hands of your husband.
I'm glad you are now in a safe place and truly loved.
How evil of an act...
I don't understand, why men think they can abuse their power this way. these acts are repulsive.
Only Jesus Christ can change these hearts.
Why is it every time it's a video of women wanting to save their marriage it's always yall women in the comment section? If this video is not about YOUR situation why comment? This is for us women who want to honor God and fight for our marriage the way God fought for us.
I think its important that both situations are on display in order to help everyone. This video also touches on both.
Divorce is something you go through not something you are.
~ Lisa Bevere
Epic!!
When my husband and I got married we both went into it saying that divorce is not an option. That is a fundamental value that we both share. Loyalty and keeping the vows we made to each other and to God are more important than our temporary feelings. We use our feelings to determine if we need to make changes to make things better.
And because we know divorce isn't an option, we both put more effort into making our marriage great. When we have problems we figure out the root issue and come up with solutions. We prioritize our marriage over everything else.
We have a date night almost every week. Even when we had almost no money. It might be having a picnic with food from home. Or just a coffee date if we couldn't afford to go out for dinner. It isn't about what we do. It's about the quality time.
For our anniversary, all but one year we have gone on some sort of getaway. And we only didn't go anywhere that year because we had just bought our first house and were barely moved in. So we did a staycation instead which was really fun! For our getaways, we used groupon deals. We found cheap places. Whatever we could afford at the time. We used tax return money for it or saved up. Because that time is important. To relax and reconnect.
I think we're here in the comments for people who have overcome, honey, or are in it still, but "thanks for your comment."
@lh485 Sorry, I'm not trying to be mean but I really can't understand what you are trying to say with your comment. I'm not sure if English isn't your first language? And if that's the case it's okay. English is really challenging, and my mom's third language was English.
@@bunny_0288 I think she's saying people in the comments are still in the process to have a good relantioship or are in a bad relantioship. Then you're the only one who's sharing a good marriage.
English is also my second language. Haha I don't know if you will understand my words.
As a child from a household of divorce Lisa's story of her parents divorce is similar to mine. And my dad quickly remarried and there was a lot I saw in that marriage too.
As a child I just stopped trying and as a teenager I held a lot of anger. Anger I couldn't confront until now in my 30's.
As a young adult I had no direction and no plan.
But God is amazing. He took a broken angry girl from a broken household with pain in her heart and made her into a God-loving, praying, bible reading warrior.
I'm not where I'd like to be, but I'm not where I used to be.
And listening to solid advice about what a biblical marriage looks like, I hope one day if marriage will happen, I can take that advice.
Challenges in relationships are part of the journey, but there’s always a way to move forward. My own marriage had significant hurdles, but with the right help, my wife and I overcame them and grew stronger. With effort and cooperation, solutions can be found. Keep your hope-solutions are within reach.
I’m facing major problems in my relationship and can't imagine losing her. I love and miss her greatly and am prepared to do whatever is necessary to have her return. I’d be deeply grateful for any advice or guidance you can offer.
Letting someone you deeply care for go is always difficult, but in my scenario, I was fortunate to have the counsel of a spiritual mentor who preserved the unity of my marriage. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.
. I'm thankful for this guidance. I'll immediately search for her online. I appreciate it. I'm hopeful that adopting this strategy will also bring about positive changes for me; I miss her deeply.
I promise you will not regret it
Mas ambas as partes tem que ter o desejo de melhorar. Só uma parte do casal não funciona
I never wanted to get married until I became a Christian in 2020. My BF of 9 years and the father to my kids finally proposed and we’ve been married for 1 year and it’s been the hardest part of our relationship. Nothing but problems since we got married. But I know the enemy hates marriage and I know God is up to something ❤
Thank you ladies for this!!! Just this morning my thoughts to God was, “Father l, every time I look on TH-cam, I feel like everything is pointing to separation/divorce. I just want to see something different please!” And here is this video today!! God is so amazing 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
Thank you for your obedience ladies. God bless you all!!
Thank you so much for sharing your marriage story Lisa! It is such an encouragement to me as a wife of almost 6 years. Watching from Nigeria🇳🇬
I’m not married yet but you share so much invaluable wisdom and advice. Thank you for your content ❤️ I shared with my sisters who are married. I hope they can learn as much as I have from you.
I’ve watched this twice because there is soooo many jams in the episode that I need to watched twice to catch them all, Lisa thank you, you have spoken so honestly it was so refreshing to hear someone in a leadership role being so open about their marriage and the obstacles that you have faced, from the bottom of my heart I can not stand people that try’s to keep an aparece of perfection while we all burn in pain and shame with no real guidance.
Thank you for giving me the courage to dream again in my marriage. My dreams died long ago and I was willing to stay and have a mediocre marriage. But thank you for inspiring me to take power back and not wait on him to change first. Thank you ❤
I also boils down to identity. I find that when I just saw myself as a wife, I felt powerless
Understanding I'm a person, a child of God etc has helped a great deal.
When I feel abandoned ,as a child of God, I look up to God for comfort .
But when I just saw myself as a just wife, it hurt so much more.
Thank you for this podcast. Lots of great insights!
This was the fastest 45 minutes ever. Please keep talking about this. It’s needed. ❤
All so fruitful - this blessed me so much! Thank you for sharing ladies!!
You forgot about psychological abuse. It doesn't have to be sexual or physical abuse, to be abuse.
Reactive abuse from narcissistic abuse, is the worst form of psychological torture.
If my parents divorced when i was a child, that would have saved me a life of extreme emotional pain and suffering. Staying with a psychologically abusive partner is NOT helping the kids. To leave such a monster would have been protecting your kids. My siblings and I were all sacrificed, bcuz my mother never had the "heart" to leave him. He was always more important than our emotional and mental health.
Narcissistic abuse IS torture. Staying with a narc will have grave consequences for the children involved. I hate it how it's always overlooked.
Mine was all 3 kind of abuse..I had to get out to be safe ❤
Thank you so much for sharing this. I'm in the middle of divorce with my narsissistic husband. Even after all the narsissistic abuse I still feel very guilty about this choice. But your comment makes me realize that this will save my 1 year old son a life of abuse and will give him a chance to grow up in a safety.
@@DorothyCorner-g7m YES PLEASE! You and Your Son must be protected and if he is NOT protecting you both and your heart ♥
GOD will, WHEN you are free from this abuse!
This. I believe I suffered narcissistic abuse. I was cornered by my husband, his entire family, and the church while my family was 4 states away.
@@JustLex98 I am so sorry you had to go through that -- Yes! Bullies corner people! Bullies are abusive.
Mature individuals discuss and unpack their concerns in a manner where no one feels threatened!
You’re going to need to do a deep dive and research on narcissistic abuse.
Because if your husband allowed his family /relatives and the church to corner you, and he didn’t protect you?! This isn’t a good sign. You need to contact your family and tell them what happened. That’s my suggestion.🙏🏼🥰🙏🏼
I have been married to my husband for a little over a year. This is my first marriage and his second. This gives me so much hope and a fighting spirit to not “give up” just because we have conflicts and triggers with eachother - it truly feels like a constant mirror being held up to one another of our greatest gifts and greatest flaws. Each time we move through conflict and into repair, we feel more bonded and sealed in covenant than ever. It’s such a beautiful unfolding of our hearts that have become one.
I've been married for 9 years, no unnecessary fights.. 1 year in marriage and fights? Very concerning
@@Kat-fw5jono it’s not concerning, every couple is different. As long as they make the Lord the center of their marriage and abide in Him, nothing is impossible!
Hi Lisa, thank you for sharing the plate story. I love your fight for female podcast and appreciate how real you are and what you are sharing is very important.
I am incredibly encouraged by this message. I am post-divorce. My parents are also divorced and I see how many lies I believed. This message gives hope. Thank you ❤️
I am one of those that God gave an option to, that I could pray for my husband and stay faithful, even when he wasn’t, or I could be at peace moving on with a divorce. I knew He was telling me that remaining faithful would have the greater blessing. So I am over a year into interceding on my husband’s behalf, and for our marriage. Restoration is a work that God has to do, and I’m waiting for how He’s going to work all this out. In the meantime, I have learned God’s faithfulness through everything. I think that is part of the blessing. 💜
Blessings! God will take care of you because of your faithfulness.
I'm in the midst of this now. God is faithful and is teaching us his character. It's a process but it's possible. Stay blessed
The comment about fighting together was so powerful Lisa... wow
My body can't take the stress anymore. 18 years of this pain is enough.
Pray!!
Mee too, 15 years of pain.
Its not normal to experience that much pain, i hope you can leave
Yes, I know. I FINALLY filed about a year ago. He was lying to me from day one. After being out on Ashley Madison, we lost all of our Christian friends. My life was a hell-hole. I haven't been a church goer for years. He was fired from jobs and was emotionally and financially abusive, even forging my signature on a $2,000 check. I wish I had never even met him.
@@JenniferG-jm4rh you’re not alone my sister ❤
Always so much wisdom from the Lord through the Bevere’s. Thank you!
God is having me listen to this this morning 🙏🏾 thank you for saying everything you did it has hit home like no other. I have been doing my marriage and my husband so wrong. I am just focused on all his wrongs instead of lifting him up with all the rights and ways he does take care of me and our children ❤✝️
Hi Lisa, thank you so much for being honest and vulnerable sharing things you've done that did not help because I am in the same situation and hearing you gives me hope that our marriage could turn around if I start focusing my mind and thoughts on Jesus.
This message has been so helpful and needed. In churches this topic is nearly not mentioned at all and I can see that the enemy is at its peak fighting to destroy marriages.
I can’t. I just can’t. I’m completely broken inside. There isn’t anything left to give him. No love, no desire, nothing. I’m tired.
I get you.
Dont do it, dont feed him more energy, recover first ❤
Same here, sugarnspice
Stay close to God, He will love you and lead you ❤
God sees you don't worry he is with you, just beside you. ❤
We need more more and more of this!! Such amazing wisdom Thank you 🙏🏻
Thank you for being a blessing!
Wow this was brilliant. Lisa is a gem. I love her ideas to hope for better with her husband, and that she has experienced different versions of him and some are her favorite. Very relatable.
Oh what a timely message and such a blessing ❤
As a Christian myself, I always thought divorce was never an option when I married my Christian wife. But later she cheated with a guy in the church whom recently divorced his wife as he claims he fell out of love, and his parent are long time church leaders. I found out and she decided to divorce me to go with him, while the pastor and his parent still deny they have committed adultery, simply because they believe the golden child of theirs wouldn't do such atrocious thing, and the pastor wouldn't want to rock the boat and seek to preserve the status quo. As much I wanted to reconcile and work things out, she has no remorse, didn't think she is in the wrong and insisted on filing the divorce. Some church friends even said there might be some things I did to her or the way I behave have pushed her towards cheating - typical victim blaming, so I decided not to talk to them anymore and actively looking into moving to a new city and away from the church that turned a blind eye to this ordeal. They completely ignore the teaching from Matthew 19 and I don't think I would ever trust them again.
That's absolutely horrible. I'm so sorry 😢
I would say pride has been a major issue….and we’re definitely still working on it. Marriage is hard :/
Marriage is challenging on its own, yes, but it is made more difficult when you are not pursuing a relationship with Jesus….
Have you fasted for your marriage?
@@GloryToTheHighest no... But it may be a good idea to consider.
@@jacqimcgarry4073 I got huge breakthroughs in marriage by fasting. Look into it. Also look into deliverance ministries. Certain things don’t change unless a person is delivered. I am speaking from my own experience. Bless you ❤
I have struggled with pride also. Always blaming my husband instead of looking inward at what needs to change in me. It’s so much easier to see the other persons faults.
You have no idea how much of a blessing this has been to me. I adore your story, you have given me such invaluable inspiration for the hope of my marriage. Time to put in the work and look towards God for my fulfillment. God bless you!
Thank you for addressing this. I am going through a divorce because of child abuse and adultery on my ex spouse’s part. I still hold guilt for ending that marriage, but it did not honor God.
Do not be guilty- that’s a lie- Jesus forgives ❤
Jesus said that adultery was the only justifiable reason to leave. Don’t feel condemnation that is from Satan
You did the right thing. God loves you more than the institution of marriage. ❤
Remember this you're responsible to them not for them
That's how I feel. And I wish I had left a long time ago. I'm just a shell of a person.
So good!! Thank you for pouring this out to us all- we are blessed to hear this and glean from you Lisa! Can't wait to see you again hopefully soon- a mercy culture member! We love you at MC!
As a woman who wants to get married one day. This was helpfull. Thank you!❤
My advice is make sure you are completely delivered and your future husband too. See how his father treats his mother. Look closely and not just in happy setting. There are bondages and curses and family and if not dealt with it can come later
Thank you for this message. God helped me understand that my marriage is a covenant and that He is the head. Our marriage is not without our struggles and issues, but, God is always faithful, and yes , we need to fight together for each other...so true Lisa, God first and see Him work!
Omg I need to hear what you heard! I love this.
Lisa, I am overjoyed to have stumbled upon you! After becoming a Christian in 2001, “Under Cover” was the very first book I read in my walk and it was foundational in changing my life. What an honor to now be able to follow the amazing wife of that author!
Nice to know that you related . Both beautiful and wise. Many blessings ❤
Coming up on 11 years in December and no matter how I try, it feels hopeless. I am trying to keep my gaze on Jesus, but every day feels like a minefield. Jesus, please help us! 💔💔💔💔💔💔
I feel the same way. No matter how hard I try, it seems like I will never do or be enough to be a priority. My tears and emotional pain are simply "drama" in his eyes.
@@landerosee5264 I'm so sorry you're struggling and hurting. I've been married for 14 years, and like she said in the video I do feel like I am doing marriage well. I'd like to offer some encouragement and some lessons that God has taught me.
1. It is not my husband's job to make me happy. It's my job. I find my happiness by spending time with the Lord, spending time with people I love and care about, consuming positive and encouraging content, working out, having hobbies, etc. When I fill my life with good things it takes the pressure off of him needing to fill that up. Think about when you met him. Are there things you have stopped doing that you used to love? Does your life revolve around him?
2. I am not responsible for anyone else's behavior except my own. Meaning I will try my best to be kind and loving regardless of other people's actions. I am far from perfect with this, but just by making an effort and doing this the majority of the time it has made a huge impact. I am only accountable for my own behavior and other people are accountable for theirs.
I do my best to be a good wife because that is what God has called me to be. I try my best to submit to my husband and to make his life better and more peaceful. To build my house up instead of tearing it down. I pray for my husband. I go to God if my husband hurts my feelings or if something is bothering me instead of creating a big fight. I realized a lot of the conflict in our marriage was me starting arguments because my feelings were hurt. And instead of expressing hurt, it came out as anger.
3. Thinking of my husband and I as a team working against whatever problem we may have. It's us against the problem. Not us against each other. We are not adversaries. We are teammates. And sometimes we disagree, but we have the same goal. We want a happy marriage.
4. Forgiveness. Love keeps no record of wrongs. And this is a tough one. It's hard to forgive and not bring up all the times he has screwed up or hurt you. But how would it feel if God did that to us? If God held all of our mistakes and offenses against us? I try and remind myself of this when the temptation to bring up the past comes up.
And again I'm not perfect. My marriage isn't perfect. But it is happy. And I don't know your dynamic at all, but are you always waiting for him to plan things? I've learned that sometimes I need to be the one to plan something romantic. And sometimes when you start doing the right thing and behaving how you want to be treated, things start getting better. It's like in 2 Peter (I think) where it talks about wives winning over their unbelieving husbands without a word. Simply with their actions. Our attitudes, actions, and behaviors can be a positive or a negative influence in our homes. At the end of the day you can't change him. You can only change yourself. But amazing things can happen when you do that. When you let go of your own pride and your own hurt and learn to love the way Jesus did. And it's hard and you will mess up, we all do. But it really does make a difference.
Yall LEAVE!! Women, you don’t have to suffer through a marriage with a man that does not honor his vows.
The hard part for me is letting go of the expectation of him to not be fallen. Which shows my lack of compassion… and actually shows my in ability to Love as well. Yes… he does this this and this and probably 30 other things and yes, it hurts and yes, I’m crying… but am I crying because his brokenness and lack of going to God is falling on me? Then that is sad and I should feel sad for my man and his distance from God. God is helping me realize that this is my issue as well and that my mindset is wrong towards my man and something God is trying to renew in me and maybe help me see that my expectations are not real and need to be surrendered(which is a wrestle as it hurts to let go of them)…. And He wants to give me that realness by listening to Him and connecting with Him first… He has to renew my mind and give me the ability to Love unconditionally. That’s where my freedom and peace will be Is letting go of expectations because God’s expectations are the only ones that really matter and I am start to understand that this is our surrender as Christian women… letting go of what we think our man should be and letting God renew our minds to Love unconditionally, as He does towards us when we fall short towards Him,… Otherwise I’m just as guilty as my man… cuz not Loving is not Loving. Almost like Abraham had to lay his son in the alter- we have to lay our view of what our man should be on the alter and give that to God and let God raise him up in His timing to His expectations and THEN we will have the Love from our man that we’ve really deep down been searching for… but we have to let go of our view and let God implant His view into our minds….. aaaand it hurts.. lol…. But I do see that the more steps I take towards listening to God here and surrendering the more I am healed and the more peace I have and connection with my Heavenly Father.. which is the first Goal, right? It’s been a wrestle for me. So I’ve been wrestling with God to give me the ability to Love unconditionally. And I agree with Lisa… abuse and affairs are a factor that changes whether one should stay or not for sure… and God would guide one there too… but if this isn’t the case… then my only goal should be to seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness… then all these things will be added to me and I will have the peace that passes all understanding. I will never find true peace in my man. I need to be searching for Him not him. And I’m saying this after many tears and much sadness of being distanced and vented on by him. This is his brokenness. Am I going to choose to Love because that is what God requires of me and what is best for my soul and for healing…? Or am I going to return evil for evil? Am I going to treat him the way that he treated me? If I only love those who love me than I am no different. If my Love is conditional than this is a sign that I, too, need the Heavenly Physician’s Power working in my mind…. Which then would enable me to have compassion on my man’s weakness rather than looking down on him and me feeling like a victim. It sorta makes us on the same page as we both need a Savior cuz not Loving is not Loving… even if we are doing it differently.
Sorry for the length… but honestly, I needed to hear it along with whoever else might.
Love you ladies and praying for God true peace and strength in our lives. ❤
Ask the Lord for wisdom, you're responsible to your husband not for him. I don't understand why so many Christians believe that they have to stay in a marriage when the other person doesn't take responsibility.
Thank you for sharing !
I pray I don't give up, I wouldn't want to throw the plate across but I think that's preferable , than giving up.
Yes, thank you for speaking on this!!
I want a divorce, I married a full on narcissist, I ignored so many red flags, I have tired working through it but it's like head butting a brick wall. It's been a total nightmare from day one, I've had zero peace since we've been together, his contempt for me is off the hook, he'll start fights with me over things he thinks im thinking, i can literally be agreeing with him and he will flip the script and start arguing the other side. I'm happy to stay single for the rest of my life, it'll be 100% better than this.
understandable, but now that YOU’VE tried all YOU can step back and allow/let GOD to do it. I pray this helps 🙏🏽
Listen to Leslie Vernick's teaching. I would encourage you to read her book. The Emotionally Destructive Marriage.
@@devontejackson4025Yes I'm trying, it's hard not to get dragged into the madness but I know God is doing a work on me through this too.
@@pamelapippin5661thanks I'll check it out.
This sounds like spiritual attacks
Please pray for my marriage I want to walk away . Hearing what you’re saying to seek God for me I’ll try it. I just don’t know what to do
❤I will pray for you!
I will be praying for you as well. God is able! Please Pray. Ask the Lord to give you the answer and direction. Don't do anything until you hear from Him! He will respond!
PLEASE try the following:
Get yourself somewhere where you can have REALLY quiet. I mean the least amount of "outside noise" as possible!
Cryl out to God in your spirit (and out loud if necessary!)
Ask Him for wisdom. Ask Him for discernment. Ask Him for revelation and insight.
Then sit quietly and LISTEN to what He tells you AND WRITE IT IN A JOURNAL!
Do this and keep doing it for at least 2 weeks!
After the two weeks, take a good long look at your marriage. Have things changed? Reread your journal entries and look at how God is working.
It works! Keep listening to Him. Keep journaling.
I can not pretend to know what God has planned for your marriage, but this will also help YOU and your frame of mind in general. God be with you and God bless you. I'll pray!
It’s ok that you don’t know what to do- I felt that way for months until a few weeks ago when I decided to really give it to God this time and let go off my pride. I had reasons to divorce and I am sure you do too but is that Gods best ? He is a retiring God. I’ll be praying for you. ❤
I felt thar way at times until I heard that love is an action word- you ha e to choose to love - i had to see my husband the way God sees him. I worked on my bad habits that I didn't realize at 1st and also prayed alot in the Spirit- God helped w bitterness and anger in my heart and did lots of changes in my husband- wow w God all things are possible. Say blessings over ur husband and say outloud ur vows and ask God to work on his heart
By far one of the best advice I have heard on marriage.
Perfect timing 🙏🏽💟
Thank you Lisa for being transparent and demonstrating to uphold the covenant of marriage to work through it, and also discouraging divorce because the only place adultery is mentioned is Matthew, when God speaks to the Hebrews, everywhere else is said it is not. Also I appreciate how you said we have to look at ourselves instead of looking at our spouse and blaming them. We need to grow for God's Glory and to help others, like you are. Thank you Lisa.
This is what a lot of people need to hear! Marriage is a covenant and you can make it work if you truly walk with God!
But sometimes a woman can't. I stayed for over 2 decades. I shouldn't have. He is still lying to me. He doesn't have any respect for me and told me I needed to provide for myself.
Hey Jennifer, I get what you mean. I just recently got separated from my husband but not by choice. I was being forced out of the house by him and his family. He wasn’t and isn’t an ideal husband but I forgave him because I need peace and to have God work on me. God is our vindicator! God can do the job in changing others, let him do his job! I have found God since the separation and then God led me to Joyce Meyer and her videos can answer most of your questions. I found out I needed to change and it’s helped me a lot during these circumstances.
I definitely need to forgive him. And others.
I know it’s hard at times but in order for you to get that inner peace you need and learn to walk the ways God wants you to walk and trust me you will feel that revelation and if next time someone lies or does or says something hurtful, it won’t bother you. I just give it to God because I have been battling with the demon for many years in my marriage and realized it only made me bitter. We fight and all it does is mess things up for ourselves.
@@rebeccaj4638 God is a vindicator. My former in laws contributed to him cheating and leaving the marriage. His whole family has reaped a whirlwind of calamity. His life has faltered. Was it hard for me? Yes I was broke and bankrupt from being an at home mom. But God has blessed me. He will make them your footstool one day. They literally act afraid of me now because they know God covers me.
My marriage is falling apart. Please pray I'm not fine
Saving your marriage and your spouses life is very humbling. God steps in and does the unimaginable. What a testimony!! I separated myself from friends who are divorced because they are so bitter, jealous and needy. I got to protect my marriage and be an example for my married daughter.
43 years married here, through the hard, bad, good and great times. I so needed to hear this today! I ran into another ‘Never do this around my husband’ moment last night. It shocked me, since I haven’t been confronted with my husband’s anger for a couple of years. Crying out to the Lord for me, handing him over to God’s care is how we have made it through. I have listened to John, been to conferences, read his books for decades. Just yesterday, as a woman, and wife I thought I need to hear Lisa’s side of being married to a strong driven man. Then last night me and my man have a fight. God’s timing is perfect. Thank you Lisa for being frank, honest and biblically bound.
Thank you for sharing this wisdom and insight. As I consider a first marriage and hear my mother’s less than optimistic words, your talks always bring me back to feeling and relying on God’s love and example. Thank you ❤
This episode went by so quick!!! Thank you for your teachings
I'm going to share this. May God save abundantly, marriage and family, in Jesus name, Amen
My husband has become the upgrade. I almost divorced him, but Jesus made him new. It was a horrible spiritual battle to get to know each other and fight for a life together and not fight with each other. 21 years of marriage and we know, different levels require different strength, we are in it until the end if God is the center of our relationship.
That sounds so powerful and beautyful ❤
Thank you 🙏❤️
Wow! Very timely. Jimmy Evans, Joni Lamb and Doug Weiss should listen to this ❤
I’m dealing with the Jezebel spirit in my husband, it’s so difficult.
Hum 🙄
Just remember this you're not responsible for him if he doesn't take responsibility. Walk away my friend. I know it's easier said than done but I think God hates more for us to stay in abusive relationship then divorce.
I am... I've been silenced. He's lied...I've tired of being the understanding wife. We've gone hungry, gone without electricity and running water. He saud in 2017 he didn't believe anymore. I havalwzys felt something was missing....but i kept thinking it's me..I just gotta be more, do more, be more. Our children are now grown. I do have a special needs daughter. I want us to experience a home where they feel emotionally safe, including me. My husband is an alcoholic..gaslights and deflects. I will longer protect his behavior. 31 years....and my eyes were just opened that this type of abuse has been happening for years. I didn't realize Financial abuse was a thing. If my leaving him brings him back to the Lord, I'm willing to let him go. I don't want a divorce..but I'm worthy of being loved, cherished ....validated...God is showing He is all that to me.
One of the best things that was said to me that took the scary out of it was that a separation didn't have to be permanent. Sometimes it's a wake up call, or just time for you to work on yourself and realize how sideways things have gotten. It's an opportunity to see truth without the filter of your everyday life. I had a friend who was separated 9 months and then they reconciled because he found God after she did. It's still hard, but not nearly as bad as it was. They are still working on it.
@MsBellsandy I've been standing. And I know i can only work on me and my relationship with God. I appreciate you taking the time to respond.
We marry for our parents, stay married for the church. This suffering has to stop and it’s usually the women and children suffering the most. If the husband is unwilling to accept his part and change his heart and behavior, she has nothing more she can do but pray!
@christinamckinney2370 we married out of obedience to God. I would've opted for premarital counseling and individual therapy. I was expecting our 2nd child when we came to know the Lord. I am by far not perfect...but then doing life I always had my husband's vest interest at heart. I'm uncovering so many crazy things...our kids are mostly grown....our youngest is 19 ....hasn't made the best choices. I've laid all our children and grandchildren....my husband and myself at God's feet.
I know i can only allow Gid to work on me. Everyone has freewill. I have to do what's God's best. And He is my husband. My vlidator, my confidence. My comforter, my safe place, my redeemer.
I chose to raise my kids
And I worked dome years....I'm regretting some of my choices...and I've repented. O have even asked my children for forgiveness.
I sense so much pride in my husband, he has 0 remorse for all the hurt and pain he's caused. When is enough..enough?
This is so good
40 years of marriage, and Im still working on this thing. We've had highs and lows, and marriage is HARD simply because we are often self-centered instead of Jesus. Marriage is like a rock tumbler. We are in it together, and are becoming smoother and more beautiful because of it. I want to enjoy my marriage, not just survive it. One day at a time. If we didn't stay together, we wouldn't be enjoying the huge INTACT family we do now. All praise to God.🙌
My best friend‘s wife long ago stopped being a participant in her marriage, but I think she prides herself in not being divorced. 32 years married with at least the last dozen years being horrible. Based on their ages, this could go on another 20 years. 😢 Just last week her brother’s 20 some year marriage came to an end. Again, years of sadness and anger. 😢
I so needed this today. Thank you, holyspirit.
This is soooo encouraging!! I praise the Lord for you guys!! I've been in a very dark season of life but I know the Lord wants to do something NEW and beautiful out of this season!! Thank you so much for surrenderring to Jesus!! I bless your lives and your families in Jesus name ❤
22:53 exactly us right now! But once that moment happened. It’s not showing change with our dynamic going forward. I am still pleading the throne for us!!❤…
Thank you Lisa for this topic❤
Being able to pray in the spirit(tongues)really helps. It’s a marriage saver for many. I have been married for over 40 years. I know it helps me and my wife. God did tell me she was His choice for me. Divorce is also a spirit like fear,anger,lust etc. It goes from person to person. Also John Bevere said a pastor told him once his church grew like it did because he taught the people to live for eternity. People especially church leaders need to have the same mindset concerning marriage. Divorce hurts people and families, church members. Should be a last resort. My friend at church that got married the same time as I did is also still married to his wife. We were all around 23 years old. Now going on 64 years old. No infidelities, no separations among us. We all are filled with the Holy Ghost speaking in tongues. It hasn’t been all smooth, but we kept going and things got better and great. This has been repeated many times over.
Very Insightful!!!
The story about your parents broke my heart 😭
I’m not leaving. I only asked that we go to therapy. He refuses to just go to therapy. He is filing for divorce for unbiblical reasons. He certainly has narcissistic traits…but even in that, I have been fighting for us to go to counseling and have always communicated that I am open to reconciliation. He wants to divorce and never speak again. He claims to be a believer but does not function as one.
I have prayed and the Lord has shown me that this is a “when an unbeliever leaves, let him leave. For God has called you to live in peace.” situation. By His grace, we don’t have children.
I have no choice but to let him leave. I am at peace and I thank Christ ❤
😢 ps 138:8❤
I thank God for Lisa she’s honest ❤
Thank you for this❤
For anyone that is finding themselves in the difficult season of infidelity . I want to say to you that God is good!!! Firstly peoples' behaviour is not a reflection of you, it is a reflection of them. We are all more broken than we would like to be and carry our unhealed past into our future. I know it is hard and I know it is painful, but God is still so good. In the midst of all the brokenness He whispers and He restores. I am walking this road for a second time (with the same husband) and God has spoken to me in such profound ways. He has asked me to stay because He is busy working. God has been so present and so faithful to me in the midst of all of this. Sometimes we only become aware of how our past is affecting us in the present, when these "terrible" things happen. Lean into God!!!
❤❤❤
A lot of people who've experienced a divorce have done what they believed was right according to Scripture but you can't decide for another person how they'll respond.
Also, parents who stay married can be just as destructive as those who divorce. It depends on a lot of things, mostly where God is in the whole thing.
God's will is his word.nt situations we go thru.
We are to submit to the word per marriage and love one another as christ loved the church.
If christ can love u whose writing with all ur sins humble ur self and love ur spouse with the same love he gives you.
Situations are nt created by God but by the devil.
@keithmatswimbo7083 you don't make any sense in response to my comment.
I believe that too. My kids might not even want to get married or at least not for a long while. They didn't see a loving marriage. 💔 My daughter has never dated and I think she is afraid to.
“Rather than being so acquainted with disappointment, I’m gonna believe that I can dream again”. Thank you for this incredible video! I was feeling like this recently, and now know that I need to turn to the Lord and that He is enough!
Oh Lisa...You are one strong woman! You know how much I love listening to you... and everytime I do, you give me one more reason to continue the fight. God bless you and your beautiful family!! Love you all.❤
Nithya from India.
I fought for my marriage for 15 years. I nearly lost my mind. I filed for divorce and suffered with guilt and anxiety for five years. I wanted to end my life. God brought me through all of it. I’m on the other side. God blessed my two grown kids who serve the Lord, drug and alcohol free 🙌🙏
I'm a newlywed and I'm already going through it. Difference in love languages, husband doesn't touch me, kiss me, or hug me almost ever. Nothing of that sort even before intimacy. Speaks harshly, curses at me and hurls insults whenever he's angry, namecalls, doesn't help with domestic chores, never compliments me, didn't even tell me I was beautiful on our wedding day, threatens divorce every argument. Supposed to be christian.. why I first fell in love with him and now I don't think he's picked up his bible in months and certainly see no good fruit. I've been further from God now. I feel so lonely. I just want to feel loved and treasured. Divorce isn't an option for me but I just feel sad all the time and have no confidence. I can't talk to anyone about my feelings either. I pray God works in us and gives us a testimony because I don't want to and won't give up..
I was talking to a guy who wanted a wife so bad. He was interested in me but God kept silent when I asked him if this guy was the one and then SHOWED me through his actions that he wasn’t. This guy claimed to be a “Christian” but I say there is a difference between a Christian man and a Man of God! It seems that this guy that you’re with was pretending to be someone that he’s not to get someone he shouldn’t have even pursued. You deserve better than this. Really seek God for what He needs you to do and pay close attention. It simply sounds to me that he doesn’t truly have a relationship with God. There are also spirits behind this as well. Just putting in what came to my mind as I read this. I’m sorry about what you’re going through, I’ll be praying for you ❤
@ When I met him he was reading the word every single day, constantly talking about God, leading Bible studies and teaching me things I didn’t even know about the Bible. He’s faith made me want to step up my faith. I fell in love with got he pursued God. On top of that he’d compliment me and was affectionate and then once he moved to Florida he switched up. I’m married to him so there’s not much I can do other than pray. I know there’s spiritual warfare behind it. I just stopped going to war which I shouldn’t have.
Sounds like a narcissistic personality. Look up Kris Reece's videos. She fell into a similar thing. You can talk to someone. You MUST talk to someone, because that's the only touch you'll have with reality. Before he cows you into not seeking counseling or belittling you into thinking there's something wrong with you, you MUST talk to someone. If you hear God that's a good place to start, but it helps to have God speak through counselors sometimes too. And it's worth looking into your own life, if there's any parental similarities in your family, there's a reason why you were attracted to this guy. We seek out what's familiar even if it doesn't look familiar at first.
@@QueenDaestrai resonate with you so much! Been separated for almost a year now from a similar personality in my so called "Christian" husband. He flirts w/ other women when it bothers me then gaslights me that I am too sensitive, jealous and needy. Does not have any affection, no hugs, kisses, no cuddles. Nothing. Stopped the affection soon after marriage. He is super smart and charming. He's teaching children sunday school at another church not to serve God, but to fish and prey upon another woman with a gentle spirit to take care of him. He smear campaigned me and makes me lose all hope in the church. People take his side bc he makes money and has the charm and big ego. Anyway, I pray God protect you and guide you to put your faith in Jesus, not man to be your true hope and give you the unconditional love you deserve and seeking..only He can make you whole and lift your confidence back up. You are loved and lovable, you are the daughter of the most High King. Not the lies your "husband" says of you. There is definitely evil spirits your husband is allowing to enter and its manifestation is name calling and abusive behaviour towards you. Pray the holy spirit soften his heart and cleanse him from unclean spirits so he is able to recognize his unChristlike behaviour towards you.
Seek a therapist and biblical counsellor to help repair your heart and make you strong in the Lord. I pray God give you peace and covers you with His love. May he give you wisdom to know what to do in your season. God is not honoured if this unbelieving husband is abusing His daughter emotionally or psychologically. Get somewhere safe and pray over yourself and husband for your own change and his. Ask God to help you get through. He will... keep up the good fight and press on. God is with you and loves you so much!!
@ thank you for this thoughtful comment. I agree there are spirits at work. I’m not saying I’ve been perfect- I have my own issues too but I know this isn’t who he’s supposed to be. Especially after prophetic words that have been spoken over him and all the positive characteristics he does have as well. To be quite honest, things have actually improved from where they were. At least though it seems. Right now I know God needs to help me with bitterness and anger because it causes me to distance myself from Him too. I know it’s definitely not helping anything. And I need to pray more again too. I know Jesus is the only one who can help me or change things.
You are such a blessing Lisa, thank you for your humility, openness, all of your conversations with husband, sons, daughter in law... Each discussion is a blessing and helpful. May God bless your mariage, family and ministry 🙏
My parents were married for a lifetime and it was a horrible abusive train wreck until dad died. I remember mom being proud she didn't divorce and stayed with him. I was so mad and disgusted because she had no idea how much their abuse for each other destroyed the life of their 4 kids. I still struggle with the consequences of the devastation they left behind in many ways. I don't see how God could take pleasure in that at all. They were hardworking and generous, but everything else was demonic from the pit of hell. We had every form of abuse in our home under the sun. If it wasn't for the grace of God, we didn't wind up in mental institutions... but the disfunction is still there for all of us....
Thank you.God bless you
I got the chills listening to some parts of this 😅
I remember when my dad was saying he was leaving my Mom. Me and my sister were crying and saying No..where will you go? He had been a pastor til i was 5 or 6. He didnt leave. Its hard to understand when my parents love The Lord. Financial strain/ working their jobs..i started to fail in some classes. My parents were mad at me. My Dad preached occasionally in other towns. I knew my Mom had to do lots bc Dad helped w ministry. I felt that tension. Kids dont know how to deal w that.
I wish my mum spoke English so I could share this with her, my parents marriage has been going bad for years, but thank God they are still married, I believe God will restore them
How I wish I had this kind of counsel 10 years ago.
I take responsibility for divorcing my husband of 21 years- I just did not have the best counsel from my pastors.
I asked my pastors for years for help and they really just pushed my ex-husband aside because i was in ministry and he was not.
Yes my ex-husband was unfaithful, but in retrospect I was too- I chose ministry and controlling pastors.
I believed and was led by individuals that should have never led a church.
Af the 17 year mark during a conversation he looked me in the eye and said, “You weren’t supposed to say yes…” All of the puzzle pieces finally fell together. How do you continue to fight for something that just isn’t there….you don’t!
💯💯💯"WHAT DOES GOD SAY"
Thank you for sharing your wisdom
Well I fought long and hard with a man that refused to ever put any effort into the marriage. Towards the end he was having several affairs and telling me what he was doing with them. He renounced God and told me he would
Never repent. I released him. He is now married to his mistress and his life is not what he thought it would be. I tried. And I refuse to put that type of effort into another man ever again
Thanks LISA AND FAMILY. I COULD NOT AGREE WITH YOU MORE. marriage has many challenges that need to be caught in The Spirit of Christ not in the ways of the world were sin is overlooked. Thanks to Jesus we have our Example of truth kindness and love. Let’s all keep being The Light of encouragement. You are wonderful. Thanks again⭐️❤️🙏🕊
I’m going through a separation due to much conflict going on in home I felt like we both need this little moment to reflect and understand. I pray my husband finds a way to forgive as I have so many times. We just had small child he’s 1 and another on the way I’m 16 weeks pregnant, I pray God is able to restore my marriage. In this moments alone I plan truly find myself with God and growing a strong relationship with him. Please pray for us Alexis and Eduardo ❤
Happened to me after my ex had numerous affairs. The church marked me like the, "Scarlet Letter."
I hope that you will read this massage. GOD is working with my husband and I after destroying our marriage, and I just wanted to let you know that this massage was a great help for me I really appreciate all that work you and your family put into all your videos. I am Hispanic from Chicago and i try to watch most of your family videos ❤
I'm 26 years in....wife has started divorce process.There are covert narc traits...she's with another man already.I pray but seems like it's done😢
Pray some more
This is such an awesome video and encouragement! I'm trying to pray and figure out Christian content creation, and my dream is to leave my target audience walking away and wanting to lean into God. This was a beautiful example of this! Thank you for trusting God and impacting everyone you do!
Divorce is not good but staying in a toxic relationship is even worst...
Go Lisa!