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EMOTIONAL AFFAIR - Signs This Happening In Your Relationship [8 SIGNS]
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 ส.ค. 2024
- EMOTIONAL AFFAIR - Signs This Happening In Your Relationship [8 SIGNS]
Have you ever asked yourself, "Why do affairs happen?", "Signs of emotional affair?", and "Is my partner cheating on me?"
A relationship advice and dating advice question I get asked a lot by clients are, "how to handle an emotional affair?" and "do emotional affairs last? In this video, I'm going to talk about Emotional Affairs - Is This happening in Your Relationship? [10 Signs}
An emotional affair can often be more devastating than a sexual affair, because the people participating in the affair can get emotionally attached to one another, which makes it more devastating for the couple who is in the relationship if they decide to work things out, or if the infidelity results in a break up.
In this video, I define what an emotional affair is, the 10 signs of an emotional affair, answer the questions, " Do emotional affairs last?, "Is my partner cheating on me if they're having an emotional affair?" "How to handle an emotional affair"
Creating a video for you on Emotional Affair- Is This Happening In Your Relationship [10 SIGNS] is something I've been looking forward to as a know a lot of my clients are struggling with this exact relationship problem, and are seeking out relationship advice and love advice as to how to deal with this type of a situation. When it comes to dating and relationships, most people have experienced something along the lines of this topic, and I'm excited to help answer questions and help you navigate through this difficult process.
It's important to know why people cheat in a relationship, whether it's emotionally or physically. Understanding the origin of why people choose to have an emotional affair is helpful in terms of knowing how to handle the situation in your relationship, and get the answers you seek.
Please enjoy this video! And don't forget to click SUBSCRIBE and leave a COMMENT!
Thank you for watching!! This is Kristin Coaching, and I am a dating and relationship coach.
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Kristin Coaching is a relationship coach and dating expert for both men and women. Kristin Coaching loves offering relationship advice to anyone who wants to strengthen their relationship, and have that long-lasting, happy relationship they deserve!
Emotional affairs do not just happen. They are kept secret because your spouse knows it's wrong, sinful and deceitful.
There is definitely secrecy going on most of the time when emotional affairs are happening, absolutely.
Agree 1000%. I am currently going thru it right now. Wife of 16 years doesn’t even want to talk and wants to get divorced because I am such a bad guy. But at the end of the day, I know it is because of the affair partner/friend. I discovered it 1.5 month ago and it is still going on. On her phone all day, never talks around me, has alienated mutual friends. I wish I could fix things but have pretty much given up since she is not interested.
You truly love someone no matter what don't cheatiwalk away from it all in end im gucci emotional affair is cheating no matter what hurt one loves you truly that something i will never forgive 💯 karma a bitch I do it right back too them enjoy it thats whore that never live you no matter what in my eyes true love never dies no matter how many breaks up you you love person no matter what mistake for me I state who does this to there partner is a whore
Personally I think they should stick together. Birds of a feather flock together.
@@KristinCoaching what if they deny having it?
They make you look like you're insecure, you never let me do anything, just trust me I would never cheat on you and they convince you and still carry on knowing that you're hurting
"It's nobody's fault". I disagree. It's the fault of the partner having an emotional affair for not directly addressing any issues they may have had in the relationship in the first place. Simply going out to seek something that seems to be missing in your relationship is unfair and cruel to your partner. A responsible person who cares about the feelings of their partner wouldn't do that; they would confront them with some problems from the beginning.
❤️👍😘
Couldn't agree more👏👏👏
I’m with you Dan 💯
My real MVP goes to WATERLAND_HACKERS on !G for saving me from getting married to the wrong person 🌟🌟🌟
Generally, hacking seems like a mole for WATERLAND_HACKERS who is on ❗G, He's so good at this stuff
Sometimes the emotional affair is just the other partner grooming the person that they're going to cheat with
You got it
FERNY EMPIRE I understand I believe I am too.... it’s so hard... been married for 12 years and I’m beyond hurt so bad right now
He is in one and my marriage is 28 years.. Been cheated for so many years. My blind trust has given him chance. Now he is not ar all bothered what pain I go through.. He cheats me without fear.
I have always suspected my wife was cheating on me. We have been married for 15 years now and its been a smooth ride until last year when she changed and started seeing other men. A friend of mine linked me up with a great hacker Cyber Hack who helped me hack into her phone, I had complete access to her phone right on my device and I could monitor all her activities for the past 2years and also have access to new notifications, her location, call logs, text messages and all. I was left with no other choice.I loved my wife so much and I just dont know why she chose to betray me, I have been a good husband and never for once cheated on her. I tracked her down to a hotel where I found her with another man . You can contact them at cyberhack003 at gmail or Whatsapp +15303784744 or text and call them directly on the same number.They helped me get access into her phone without even touching her phone.I have enough evidence against my wife now and I am thinking of Filing for divorce. I want advice from men and other women on here, should I give her another chance because of our kids or file for divorce ? We have a 4months old baby.
People will forget what you SAID .People will forget what you DID But they will NEVER forget how you made them FEEL.
Leo Lordman if she’s been cheating for awhile she will probably continue Save yourself more heartache and divorce you deserve better than this . Your baby will not know any of this pain but if you wait and decide later then your child will suffer
Goodluck ! This is just my own opinion you know your situation
My ex boyfriend did this with his coworker, and when I told him how it made me feel, he said I was being needy, and when I asked him to cut communication, he said I was being controlling. His coworker was married and they were good friends of ours. I had asked him if he thought her husband minded that they spent so much time together and his response was “If it’s a healthy relationship with trust, it’s not a big deal.” He wouldn’t change, and I eventually broke up with him. She ended up leaving her husband, and the two of them started seeing each other and eventually got married. They deserve each other, and I dodged a bullet.
Then they really love each other
Im going thru the same thing with my wife. Her and her coworker are sooo close. She went on a girls trip and out of all the pics she took she didn't send me any but he got a pic of the roof of the hotel she stayed in. When i asked her about it she doesn't know why she sent it to him.
@@carlel121 So it been going on? How they get to the love stage so fast?
@@michaelmoody6808 If they married they love each other period! Men ran from commitment, and he did the opposite it means something right?
@@michaelmoody6808 she is cheating, I'm going through the same thing with my husband. For him it's with random girls on dating sites and only fans. He swears to hv never slept outside. I found a condom in his jacket on a random pocket. He said it was for his friend who had him keep it. He really thinks I'm stupid
My current partner doesn't even believe in emotional affairs. In his mind, if it's not physically having sex, it's not cheating. And this is such a common mindset. I've been cheated on in some form or another in every relationship I've had, and especially with social media, I've lost all faith that anyone faithful exists anymore.
I agree and same
Here.
Usually the mindset of the person doing it
My guy is recovering from a porn addiction of many years and doing it without a counselor so I don’t trust he’ll be able to break it! Sad damn deal. Where are the normal men??
My husband didn’t say it was just friends! He told me it was his cousin!! Then he got himself a second phone I didn’t know about! Definitely TRUST YOUR INTUITION!
So this response was just a long spam message trying to pawn off some BS service. This is worse than watching an investment video and seeing the spam conversations in the comments.
@@saintmarybulicek567 darkwebprohacker?
Lame advice! There is blame here. The cheater is to blame. They chose to cheat. They chose to lie. They chose to keep secrets. They chose someone else. They chose to take away your choices by keeping secrets! They chose to victimize you. They chose to be selfish and do as they pleased at your expense! They chose to build their ego at your expense! These things don’t just happen without blame. They’re bad choices the cheater chooses to make deliberately against their partner. There is blame & it’s called, BETRAYAL!
When my husband was on a lunch break walk a female coworker asked to join him alone. Hello lady did you think his wife would be fine with that ? What kind of person is she ? Obviously it was wrong because he wouldn’t allow me to do the same. I found out seeing a text asking to walk with him again next time he’s at the office. It happened many times without being told it was kept secret and she told him intimate things about her home relationship. Not cool especially when she’s the HR person. Should know what an employee boundary is. Walking in a group fine alone with the opposite sex that’s a date.
But yet you decided to stay with a cheater....
I really don't understand why??
This video validates all that I feel in my relationship with my wife. She tells me I’m overreacting. But I am feeling all the signs the author describes. I have been made to feel stupid and insecure in my relationship with my wife of 30 years, by her. We are in the process of divorcing and I cannot wait to walk out the door. What the author is talking about is so true, especially the gut instinct. And of course its easy for the cheater to disregard my claims of her infidelity cause there is no “physical proof “. Well you cant hide your lying eyes...
Females that are narcissist gas lite you ,theyl say you are so sensitive for being a man , it's all in your head , you are very insecure for a male , you are inventing doubts ,. You are a cry baby , I was there and she had 10 different affairs even inside my apt in the morning and when I was sleeping.
I think an emotional affair is far worse than a physical affair.
Yessir ! Just went thru this and it hurts
For me they're both equally as bad.
As do I. 100%!
Physical can be worse because of STDs
@@elijahyero Take it from me! Don’t stay because of your child! Your child knows exactly what’s going on. You’re not doing that child or yourself a favor! Leave now. I stayed and wasted years of my life. My grown children told me they were miserable.
The problem is u start realising these only after u get to know u were cheated.. otherwise there is no reason to believe something is wrong. U always thing u were in the best love...It's really sad that it happens
If you're having an emotional affair please clean up your life and be honest with the person you're cheating on. Stop using other people to get your needs met. If you feel you can't get your needs met with your partner then give them the respect of giving them the option to get out of the relationship too. Stop being selfish, and start being honest. Honesty is the highest form of respect you can give someone so if you really love someone you'll be honest with them. And if you're not getting your needs met then make a clean, dignified break. Communicate! You're not 2 years old. At the end of the day we're all adults and we should act like one. If you want your partner's attention, intimacy, and love then ask them for it. Stop trying to use other people to fill your miserable void.
"Honestly is the highest form of respect" 🎯
Spot on!!!!😕
I'm impressed with the quick response from waterland_hackers on Instagram. He delivers quickly and at speculated
People can tell the difference between a platonic friendship and a physical lustful one.
Thank you for your comment :)
Agree with that. My partner says that he needs to have deep emotional connections with other women. That's who he is. Its really painful for me.
He thinks I am insecure and jealous.
Kasia Huzij if that’s not okay with you and he’s stepping over that boundary, I’d just kick him to the curb.
Generally, hacking seems like a mole for WATERLAND_HACKERS who is on ❗G, He's so good at this stuff
All 8 signs were completely accurate! Wow! You nailed it. I was so confused and sad before seeing this video. And it wasn't physical because him, her and I live states apart.
You couldn’t have made this stuff up any more accurate!!! Everything you said is the profound TRUTH!!
All of these were present with my now-ex and I ignored them. Never again.
Most emotional cheaters don’t even cite that the relationship was the issue, and those are just the ones willing to admit it. It has more to do with them not being in love and just being infatuated. When it inevitably wears off, they blame their partner for not being “the one” when really it’s their fault because they’ll ALWAYS see the grass as greener
I’m glad that it happened to me, it made it much easier to leave and it ended how I thought it would. No more walking on eggshells, competition’s or feeling belittled. All I know, is I did my best and communicated the best I could.
Ha
Thanks so much for this video. Before this he convinced me that I am the "crazy" one. Now I know I'm not.
My husband did the same, rather than acknowledge what he is doing he tells me I an nuts. Very cruel.
Thank you for the information, extremely supportive and ❤
Her emotional affair turned into a physical. I begged her to talk with me. Tell me what was going on with her, why is she so distant, can I help?
"I'm fine" is all that I got.
Seeing her kiss him destroyed my world and my confidence.
Not sure if I can bounce back from this.
You were not the problem it was her!! you dod your best and She crossed the line & boundaries!! not you!
When someone cheats it’s not your fault! Just went through it myself! Went NO CONTACT! I’m glad I did I gave me time to start to heal and realize I was being lied to, gas lighted, set up and she monkey branched to the other person. Since I listened to my intuition I caught on to what she was trying to do and discarded her first! Trust me if she’s gone this far she’s let you go emotionally a while ago.
Ending an emotional affair is as painful if not more so than ending a physical affair. No matter what age...
Oh boohoo! How do you think the other person feels being betrayed?
I’m not sure this video really addresses the devastating impact of broken trust from these affairs.
“Getting your relationship back” requires trust to be rebuilt, which in turn requires a change of behaviour-and this is where things often unravel.
Emotions are required before the Physical affair. If she is cheating with her feelings or her body, she/he needs to be divorced. Trust is lost!!!
He doesn't want to talk at all.. I tried my best.. He doesn't consider me worth to have a conversation.
When people show you who they are believe them.
28 years into my relationship, I discovered he was having an emotional relationship online for 3 months. I found out in June. I destroyed his laptop, and he threw me out of the house. I now live with my daughter. He doesnt care that he has lost his family. I am more furious that he made a complete fool out of me, under my nose.
My husband came home from his mothers funeral in Mexico and told me his cousin wanted to see our family photos. I added that cousin on my Facebook account and was speaking to her for a few months telling her things about my family address to my home etc. After three months I found out he had a secret phone and he has been speaking to that cousin which really turned out to not be his cousin for Three months. They had sent over 200 messages to each other we have been married for 29 years I’ve been with him since I was 16 years old. It’s been a year and we are still together but it’s been one of the hardest years of my life and it still seems as if it happened yesterday.
@@truckingwithtobee it's been a year, how are you doing now?
I’d go get half that house back!
Thanks for sharing this video...
Thank you for making this video. I did 2 of the 8 signs of emotional affair. This video is going to help me fix my realashsonihip with my wife
Thank you for acknowledging emotional affairs!!😭😭👍🏼👍🏼
Of course! They are very real and happy often in relationships.
I’m a professional who had helped many people navigate these rough waters over the years . Kristin is spot on. Her point 7 is, in my experience, the most important; appearance. This is much better noticed in women for obvious reasons. They, as Kristin put it, go that “extra mile “ to look good when they will be in the presence of this individual. They spend more time primping; every hair in place, special attention to makeup , outfits, jewelry, fragrances, etc. I liken it to getting ready for a first date. My best advice is to confront it immediately. It is vitally important that they know that you are not oblivious to what’s happening. It’s not going unnoticed. Don’t allow an emotional affair get to the point where there’s no turning back.🤔
I think all of the points were spot on. That is from myself, after I had an emotional affair with a female coworker. I am 60, she is 40. Her motivation was that she said she was splitting up with her husband who she said was not good enough and had banished to the spare room - she was looking for "connectedness", was determined not to have a physical affair, but instead to have a friendship with a nice guy (me) - and I was willing to be a beta guy for her. My motivation was that my wife of 30 years went into menopause and stopped having sex with me. Over time I resolved my issues through honest conversation with my wife, the threat that I may need to find sex elsewhere, and eventually her agreeing to HRT. However by the time this had happened, the emotional affair was a powerful bond that my AP did not want to break, and I felt she needed my support. Finally I ended it, rather abruptly, when I realised that she was having delusional thoughts about monkey branching to alpha males who she thought would become a stepdad for her 3 kids, so she could then ditch hubbie, that she was treating her ex very cruelly by withdrawing sex, and not being honest with him. Of course she is now very angry with me, but ending that EA was necessary for us both, and for the sake of our spouses.
Happened with my husband...used to always wear sweats and a hat to work ..now he held his hair and wears more form fitting clothing. He said he gets comments now from coworkers that he's so handsome and admitted he did this to impress the coworker he is having an emotional affair with
I was being the trusting husband. I sent my wife 1800 miles away to see her childhood friend for a couple of days. It is true about the gut instinct. Last week I checked her email, Facebook and phone records. He (they) were calling at all hours for a week. Then I noticed that she had put Google Voice on her phone. She claimed it was just a friend. But when I asked her if that was the last time, I asked her to swear on-our kids lives. She told me she hadn’t reached out to him since then. I found out just a week ago that texts were exchanged. I just recently found pictures, nothing crazy wise but why?
Now I find Facebook messenger convos with other guys that she was good “friends” with when she was a teenager.
To say I’m devastated and confused is an understatement.
C Owns I went through the same thing with my husband of 44 years. He reconnected with his first high school love this past year. It went from FB private messages to a meeting months later. We live in the mountain west, and she lives on the east coast. We have property in the same state where she lives, so it was a great excuse to meet without me. (The excuse was that he was going out to meet his buddy who also owns 1/2 the property.) That was the beginning of the emotional affair they began. I actually thought my husband and I were on solid ground, but apparently he thought he was missing something from our relationship so he began reaching out to her. I found out just five weeks ago about gifts and money he sent as well as a round trip ticket he paid for to bring her to our second home for a week! All unbeknownst to me. I trusted him too much. We are working on our marriage and he feels very remorseful, so I am hoping there is hope for us....
Good luck to you and I hope your wife is willing to work on your marriage...
I get what you’re saying. I just think that if someone has an affair, I don’t think I’d want to go out of my way to ease them back into being in love with me. They messed up. I’d be gone.
Yeah but when you spent 20+ years doing life and have kiddos together on top of that.. it makes it all 10x more difficult to just walk..
Wahhh so detailed and comprehensive.
I am so impressed. Good teachings indeed.
What you have described here almost happened to me.
I could text the lady all the time, I could come home late at night after I have talked to her. I think my wife was really worried by my behavior change.
But I thank God is now a gone issue.
Continue with your good teachings.
You have spoken the truth👏
Wow my husband is doing all 8 of these. Thanks for the video!!!
Wow spot on with honor and respect, thank you✨
So happy you liked that. You are very welcome :)
Currently going through the effects of this as my 6 year relationship recently ended. He started acting really distant and we kept arguing. He would stay out late every day and like avoid me which was really strange. Turns out he was talking to a coworker after I found a woman’s work top in our laundry. He confessed that they would sit in his car a couple times a week and talk for hours and he was becoming emotionally attached to her. The girl had a bf and they would confide in each other about their relationship problems. Told me he cut off contact with her but I then later found out he was lying. Never confessed it was physical but I’m sure it was as well. He said he did it because he liked the attention and blamed me for not giving him enough love and attention...
Thank you so much for the upload. Really appreciate it have a question and that emotional affair happen between your wife and another female coworker could that resist between two females
Video waa great up to the point where you said these things just happen and nobody is at fault. It sure takes a lot of work to keep these affairs secret for them to "just happen". A lot of decisions are actively made that lead up to and maintain the affair. This sounds like something said by a person using self-deception to justify their actions.
Right aint finna believe that crap
This was excellent 👌 Well done ❤️
Thank you. I'm so happy you found this helpful :)
You are spot on👍
I listened to this 2 years ago when I was going through this. This was and is excellent advice. However, with more clarity I would add that the emotional affair is the foreplay before the sexual connection they are trying to establish. Usually, one or both have something to lose such as a spouse or boyfriend,girlfriend or career. They are establishing the emotional connection "friendship" to determine if it is worth it but remaining technically on safe ground. Some co-workers remain in these emotional affairs for years.
I found that calmly stating that I was fully aware of what was going on, how it made me feel and that I was not going to "play along" helped tremendously. Being understanding of the other person's weaknesses and our own is important too. Don't be mean or unkind to them but definitely begin to make the moves you need to prepare for a split. I found a new job temporarily, new location, start doing those things to improve yourself physically, mentally (counseling), spiritually. I sought counseling to save my marriage, then counseling to be a better wife to my next husband with no bitterness. Take some short weekend vacations with friends or alone. Invite your spouse but don't cancel because they don't want to go. It takes a long time for your spouse to get the cold water to the face sometimes and one day they realize what they have is worth keeping or they move on. Either way be ready and be happy for them and yourself.
When you find yourself playing along that it doesn’t bother you to your core beliefs, and they keep the affair going, you pretty much have the answer you were looking for, it’s basically over for the relationship, and I say, go, you want to continue this then go be with them. Best wishes, just don’t plan on coming back.
This is so accurate
From day one of twenty two years, his family was always more important than his relationship with me. He was always trying to say it wasn't important, he was always wanting to be home instead of going on family outings that weren't including his family of origin. He was always talking about me to others and about our relationship issues. Violated my personal being and destroyed my ability to trust him.
Yup experienced that enmeshed family dynamic. It was like I was in the marriage with the in-laws to!
@KellyJoseline-jg2wi He left me to live with his family after both his parents died nearly a year apart from each other. He and his family forced me to be the one to file for divorce and then didn't want me to be able to send him the papers only drawing out the divorce. He had me put his belongings in a separate storage unit and never came up to get them. The whole time he was seeing other women and such on social media and well as in person. I've stayed single since the divorce only talking to friends who are themselves in relationships and no where near being the Other Woman, Woman in Waiting being, or the friend getting benefits. No sir, I take care of my three special needs grandsons and have No time for anything let alone go on a date. I also at this point don't want anyone in my life, can't trust anyone these days so why bother.
This is exactly what ended my 20yr marriage!!! But I don't think anything would of changed it or stopped it because my soon to be ex husband is a weak lying coward!!! He refuses to communicate with me because he knows there will be logical push back that forces him to admit his own issues within the marriage!!! Can't do that when u always have to be the victim now can u?? I'm sure there are some couples that can resolve this issue but I refuse to take responsibility for problems I have no knowledge of simply because a grown ass man can talk to everyone but me about them!!! Even when I stand in his face & ask him point blank or give him every opportunity to say what he feels or needs he won't do it..... STILL WON'T!!!! I'm sure I have blame in our relationship failing but I'm not sure what or how & he refuses to tell me anything, to me that's a coward & I'm done💯🙋♀️
Atheist in Alabama shut up
Wow after reading this I know why he ran to her. I bet she’s feminine and inspirational.
This is spot on. My ex did this to me.
Love hurts when you deny the feelings.... you just become so depress and don't know what you should do. I learned not to stop resisting the feelings. It hurt so bad to finally figure out why I felt the way I felt when I first saw her. I just knew something, but I didn't think it was love... she helped me by telling me I was doing the wrong things in life and I needed to stop. I was like who she think she is my mom, but she was caring and showing affection for me. I was blinded and didn't know why she questioned the things I did when there were other boys that were doing the same. She picked me out of the other boys... she also saw something in me when I looked into her eyes. I saw something and she saw something when she looked in my eyes. I didn't want to think I loved her because I didn't want to wait for any girl, but I am. She helped me so I'm helping her by telling her it's ok not to be ok. I pray for the ones to stop denying your feelings for someone you truly love or you'll become depress until you figure out why you have strong feelings for that person.
this video has been a significant help. i knew something wasn’t right, in my gut. i even expressed this to my family but i could never pin point what the problem was. glad im not crazy lol! to me, he would never do this.. i felt like he truly loved me . im in shock honesty. uhg the heartache
It's been 11 months.. how you doing now? How did you heal?
Went through this as well! Found out about the emotional affair and left the marriage. Told my family and friends that I would have never thought in a million years she could have cheated and have done the things she did. Came out of left field for me truly.
Earned a sub.+like! Thank you!
Aww thank you so much! So happy you enjoyed the video :)
You're welcome Ma'am. God bless you!
Spot on.....👍
Thank you.:)
Great video. Trust your gut and get out of the relationship. The deception, lies and selfishness must never be tolerated or excused. Get out asap.They don't care and won't change.
You cannot fix others.
Why rekindle or hold on to such a negative relationship dynamic?
Why live in fear of the poor behaviour of others ?
It was all a pack of lies.
Forgiveness is admirable, but reconciliation too often binds us to those who will continue to do us harm.
My girlfriend is showing all eight of these signs. She refuses to cut off being friends with and going to see her quote best friend since kindergarten and now they're both at the age of 49. I'm wanting to start checking things out hiring a private investigator. Her not wanting to cut that off shows that that person means more to her than our relationship does.
just end the relationship!! better that way
Honestly, If they've been best friends for 44 years, you're disposable. Sorry, I wouldn't throw away a decades long friendship with a female for a girlfriend that I've only been with for a little while, either.
@@neilpeartspurplenose8739 in that case those both should marry because literally everyone else who will come into either of their lives, will be deemed "disposable" as you said..who will be able to compete with that history? It's a losing game from the start.
I can't believe I stumbled on this video. My current partner soon-to-be past partner, I'm not sure where we are, was on Facebook dating and has been talking to a guy off of there. I confronted her about it and she got defensive and said I guess I can't make friends. She doesn't realize she is having an emotional affair. Especially when you tell somebody that you spent the day hiking with your friend when I haven't been given The Break-Up.
My husband told co workers female and male about the way I was when starting menopause and my temper and jealous streak especially the female ones really embarrassed me, I couldn't control what was happening to me it really upset me even more, he spends alot of time on his phone, day and night no communication at all or very limited communication, he's very stand offish with me or very short tempered I have been open with him he's just angry or not bothered the next with me, noticing my bad points from my good points, and I do have more good points than bad but he doesn't wanna go to a shop with me not even the cinema no where, even before lock downs, I just stopped talking and speak now when spoken to, because I'm sick of being criticised, if I spoke how you are to try and talk he'd tell me shut up and you live in a fantasy land, I just give up.
Wow this woman is a genius l am right here heart broken. I m going through this and she is playing too much a victim.
Ideally I would love to have THAT conversation. It’s never going to happen with my h as he refuses to talk with me. Sad.
I'm single like a lone wolf.. But how do I stop an emotional attraction with someone I have to see a few times per week? I know there's no problem with being attracted with someone if you are single, however I just wanna be capable to cut it off this even when I have no partner. I just wanna have self-control over my feelings. Greetings from Colombia South America..
If only i found this video 1.5 years ago. Ex had an emotional affair and i did ask her sever it but she reversed on the said issue. She was being groomed to cheat.
Hi Kristin i got the "just friends" explanation and then things died down . But my gut tells me secretly the emotional connection still builds. She sparely goes out and when she does she is so blunt and vague about who, where and why she stayed out so last and even ignores me checking up on her. She doesnt communicate when i ask where she went or who, and barely know her friends. What do i do in such a situation? She says and acts like she really loves me but goes blunt sometimes when these shady outings pop up
Hey man..was reading through the comments, and I know this is 6 months old, but something told me to stop and say something to you. Hope all got better with your situation my friend.
All of the signs are spot on. I’m so glad I left my ex when I did.
Are You Still Single?
Went through this. God this is so affirming
Love your channel. You need to do something about the spammers and fraudsters that are posting comments on your TH-cam channel. You need to erase them. They are fraud they gain access to peoples accounts and they rip them off!
I’m glad to come across this video. I like how you point out the red flags and have the what to do after for those who chose to stay together. My partner and I are on the path to moving past this with a better understanding of our love and bond we both built together for the past 30+ years. I feel really sad for the lonely wolf who initiated the contacts and tried to break us up. She doesn’t know anything about soulmates, soul ties, or people who truly love one another. I bet she knows now.
My husbands emotional affair is with a young woman who is about to get married, she lives with her fiance but calls and texts my husband night and day. I don't see her marriage lasting.
Your husband was a complicit and active party in the emotional affair… it takes two people to have an affair… your husband is as guilty as his affair partner is…
Your husband knew what he has done
Spot on all..but he never realized the mistake and blame everything on me saying im overly jealous and said that im the problem..while he hide so much the fact that he fetch her to work, openly talk to her about our problem relationship, deleting message after chat..
Hello if my husband is having an emotional affair how does e separate himself from that person ?
My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years. He has been having an emotional affair with one of his coworkers without me knowing for approximately 2 years. He says they’re only friends. As far as I know they only see each other at work. They do occasionally go to lunch with each other. He says he doesn’t want her physically and that he loves me, wants to move in with me in another year when his daughter and my 2 children are gone away to school. I asked him to stop texting her about non work topics. He flat out said no that he won’t do that. I’m desperate to hear what or how you can help.
Nice video. I'm married for six what's and have two kids one is five and the other is one. I'm happily married but I do have a childhood friend who I talk to. He's a guy buy we are friends nothing more. I don't share any secrets about my marriage to him. We talk everyday and love each other as friends.
Emotional affairs are a true sign that whoever they are having the affair with are an emotionally better person for them to spend time with and it's time to end the old relation and move on to the new one, because if the spouse or significantly other was their true soulmate, they would not feel the need to be emotionally connect to another person. Witch is a tell sign. So, I think it's better to just acknowledge the facts instead of avoiding the real elephant in the room.
As humans we want to be with the person who we feel most emotionally connected to. It is not something that can be faked or forced. Either you have an emotional connection or you dont.
If you have a strong emotional connection with your partner, there would be no need to seek out others as a genuinely emotional connection makes you feel seen and heard and understood, but lack of such connection will lead to one need, want and seek such connection. Just be open about it. Do not cheat. Cheating will hurt more than being honest.
Just acknowledge that sometimes we end up in a relation that was not the right one for us. Either it was wrong time or place or circumstances, but at the time it seems like a connection but after meeting with your true connection you realized that it was not so. We are all people and we all do mistakes in life but we learn from our experiences and every experiences teaches us something so do not think it was waisted. time because everything we experience in life is shaping who we are as humans even if it happened to be a karmic relationship that purpose was to teach us something about ourselves that we did not know.
Know when to fix the past or move on to the future. Not everything can be fixed and it is not suppose to either. Life is short and full of surprises. Life your life without regrets.
Coming from INFP 9w1.
My husband hit everything on this list .. and during that time he even told me that he will move out twice
Mine told me he was or has got another phone.
What do you do when all these points are addressed with the spouse but he still won't stop texting the AP continuously? How do i address the texting when I acknowledged what led us both down a path where he sought support from a coworker but now that i am trying to be more present and supportive he still won't stop texting or cut off the relationship and works with them. He wants both of us and is confused on what choice to make..... Do i be patient while he is going through a personal crisis?
Hi kristin thank u for this wonderful advise. My question is, is it ok to communicate with that “just friend” person that my other half is talking with? I caught them one time talking over to social media and i just notice that the way they exchange comments in social media is different something fishy going on. Now me and my bf are on a break, he asked for space. Its been two weeks now and he said he needs to figure out things with a clear head. I understand what he wants but my concern is the lady that he is talking to. Can i just talk to that lady to ask what really is going on?
Hi Christina. Well, I would like to point out that if you feel the need to ask the girl what's really going on, your relationship is definitely lacking trust. If you can't go to your significant other for an honest answer, you two are struggling with a core foundation in your relationship. Also, you gotta trust that gut instinct of yours. I think we fight that off too much sometimes when signs are right in front of our faces. In healthy relationships, the ACTIONS our partners do towards us and towards other people are indicators that things are good and healthy, or bad and worrisome. And I hear you sound worried over the exchanges you read. Also, if you talk to the girl, what makes you think you would get an honest answer out of her also. So there really is no way to fully know except the intuition and observing the actions of your significant other. How long are you two going to take a break for?
If he asks for a break that means a break up...tell him there’s no guarantee you’ll be there if he decides to “come back”
Go no contact because he monkey branched and that’s worse then an affair or rebound. Means it’s calculated and he’s a real manipulator..dodge a bullet and leave his cowardly A@@
He was very covetous of his phone and I brought it to his attention and he is now not taking calls in my presence ; however, I don’t like that because he is now more sneaky. Example , he’ll go outside and do some chores and be on his phone while out there!
@KellyJoseline-jg2wi oh gosh I wouldn’t know how to do that
He was addicted to porn and confessed that to me and said he gave it up cold turkey …but I don’t buy it. A 14 year obsession ya just don’t end without help. I don’t know. He otherwise was a very good guy but he’s got thst hang up. I broke up with him because my sanity was more important than any happiness we could have had. Had he signed up for counseling I maybe would have stayed
What about if they're always accusing you of cheating?
The worst is "he" denied cheating!!! even though he defense "her!" After I spoken out, he didn't want to face it, he ran out.
Same here
@Kristin Coaching hello Kristin i have questions for you over affairs please can you help understand them please i have though and scenario you what happen if i was dating someone i was married to them i start to see my ex boyfriend behind my husband back if only hugging and kissing and holding hands and texting him without having to have sex with them what that emotional affair or physical affair.
1 if someone an affair without sex, is that really cheating?
2 can people have emotional affair with their ex boyfriends and girlfriends behind their husbands and wifes back?
Thank you for your time and stay safe and well from jess sellars xxxx
But when talk openly with them about their emotional affair they refuse to agree what to do at this point...
Well, I mean an "emotional affair" is just the label, right? So if they refuse to call it an "emotional affair" you have to start speaking about how your partners actions are impacting you and the relationship in a negative way. That they can't deny.
Did that which caused more lies and gas lighting. I finally had to be the adult in the room. I finally had to say “if your no willing to be honest and own what you’ve done, I can’t move forward with you in any kind of a relationship. I went no contact and then divorce. We also have to know our worth because lying, cheating and manipulation is not love. I call these folks cowards, I want someone with honesty and integrity.
Friends or family are the case of trust breach then opened to outside circles and dressing duff. You nailed a few on the list wow thanks
Following up on a recent post... I believe I am still going thru one after discovering that the emotional affair partner involved with my wife was also MARRIED. I found out when his wife contacted me and told me. The man’s wife also ended up calling her after finding her number on their bill. I also found that they live a lot farther than I knew. 3000 miles away. Crazy!!! Thoughts???
Do not concentrate in the other man you have a lot to work your relationship...but sometimes it's too late. And there is not turning back...hopefully you would be able to bring her love back it depends how good husband you were...
My guy has been behaving well lately and super attentive and respecting my boundaries but he’s in a rush to get married. I feel like he’s going to change as soon as he “gets me.” The reason I think this is because early in our relationship if I pulled away he was super attentive and when I was giving him attention and letting him be certain I was crazy for him..he’d pull away …
Im not sure if you will see this but my boyfriend has a girl bestfriend. He told me he loves her and i understand that, she has a rough life and needs someone to be there for her. He said he onky feels a connection with her as platonic and that im then one he loves as a partner. I recently found that he sent her texts saying i love you with hearts and everything. It broke my heart whenni saw it. I want to tell him how infeel about this but i dont know how to approach it without him getting defensive.
What if that person was one time his sister-in-law, ex fiancee and on again off again girl friend?? We have been together for three years and he says he wants to be with me only. She has been helping him recuperate from colan cancer. She is the nurse. He is about to have surgery again, and she will be helping again. He says she is his nurse and friend nothing else. I am his girlfriend, and he wants to be with me. It is just so confusing.. Yet he doesn't want me to call at night because it will disturb her.. It doesn't make sense, if he loves me why should he be concerned if it bothers he if I call.
As a professional dealing with this kind of thing, I think the first step is where it’s one sided. They have an infatuation with someone. A “crush” on this person. The red flags are the same as in my other post. Confront it! Of course, they’ll deny it. Perhaps you are the one who has a “crush” and you’re telling yourself it’s a “just friends”. Whether it’s you or your partner, ask this question. How would you feel if this person finds a new love interest? Would you be genuinely happy for that person? An HONEST answer to that question tells you all you need to know. 🤔
1 if someone an affair without sex, is that really cheating?
2 can people have emotional affair with their ex boyfriends and girlfriends behind their husbands and wifes back?
3 what type of affair is only holding hands and kissing and hugging without having sex with them?
My bestie is kind of going through a mess. I’m not saying it’s right but I disagree on the not your fault point. If the relationship is toxic /has been for extended time and the needs and boundaries have been expressed over and over, and an unwillingness/mental gymnastics still continues.... by this I men still making one feel bad, hurtful manipulative comments, complete intolerance to the notion of say counseling (resulting in ones mental breakdown and being hospitliazed) ... continuously breaking up with them but then deciding on their own that said breakups never happened... do you blame someone for not feeling great in their relationships? I’m nit saying it’s ok for her to go seek whatever In someone else (personally my vice is admittedly complaining to my mom and girl friends), but as the... um “ lucky “recipient of her constant drama, my fake is that at a certain point the partner has to take responsibility for emotionally shitting on the other! I think the solution is calling it a day, but I don’t think either one is really letting go...
I really appreciate your opinion Rebecca. There are always grey areas and varying circumstances to relationships that cause people to seek emotional support somewhere else. So I definitely get what you're saying.
What if it has been going on for years and that it even went as far that my husband started a bussiness to accommodate her in running it basically. And we have been separated for almost 2 years under the same roof but doing nothing together. Every day is eating away at my sanity. Wondering did they see each other. What do they get up to....what do they text each other. Then I demanded to see what they chat about. A text from her was " Why don't you want to fill up my love tank? That was a week ago.
I found out we bought a house in a place his friend thought was nice and that she had been telling him not to buy in they neighborhood we were first looking into. I only found out nine months after married.
I kind of feel that once they do it the potential for them to always do it is there so it can be time to walk away.
My husband stayed friends with the woman he had an affair with in his first marriage he said the relationship changed into friendship i believed him but he puts her ahead of me and hangs out with her disregarding how i feel. I feel lost in what to do.
Omg I feel your pain ... you got to express how you feel and listen to your intuition what does it tell you about your husband and his “friend” if he’s cheating you need to divorce him !
“He had an affair in his first marriage” cheater don’t stop cheating, just sayin. Love bomb, devalue, discard, repeat. You need to decide which stage he’s got you at before he discards you.
I think my bf is doing this and we have been fighting about it and it’s very hard for me to stay calm he told me he wants to hang out with his female co worker outside of work and that I’m not allowed to go as well and told me he don’t want to make her feel like a 3rd wheel he tells me I would not not like how close they are as friends and that I’m not stable because How crazy Iv been acting about her. I told him I don’t feel comfortable with him being alone with her and he told me that’s not my problem that you are insecure.
Nicky Jones you need to leave him honestly, my ex use to save a girls name in his phone as a males name to hide he was chatting it up with her it’s disrespectful and shows he had no integrity
Wow leave the dude thats like saying umm im just going to date someone else just wait until it gets sour and you can come back into the picture later or get used if i dont get sny from her
Wow. He sounds just like my pos husband. Calling me insecure. Saying I have no say who he is friends with..etc. Its just sickening and heartbreaking to go through. How are you young now?
Yup time to exit the stage! When sometime shows you who they are believe them. After that if you stay it’s on you.
Omg get rid of that loser love yourself more you deserve better!
What if your spouse is having an emotional affair with a woman who is living overseas with a woman he use to know???.
I’ve ask him to not have them over at our home, when I’m not home. But he says they are my friends, I’m an adult you can’t tell me what to do. So I don’t know what to say or do. He’s not one to talk about feelings, he never has. I would love to have a conversation about this but he says there my friends I just need to get over it. I’m having a lot anxiety over this.
We are never unaware...
Of anything..
But why do people do this is my question. If you don’t feel happy in your relationship, dont keep your SO as a spare wheel in the meantime. Just let go and no need to betray anyone. People are so cruel
As the male point who is looking this info up, at what point is it that after being emotionally ignored or even pressed away does it become ok based on the alternative would be divorce. Tldr version... i was 298 lbs and went on a diet deciding to improve myself... she sat aside eating candy and drinking beer and telling me it would never work, in 8 months i dropped 115lbs and she was so mad that it worked sex stopped and every thing i looked forward to about her faded. I have an emotional support that is mental only never physical and that person is helping me to work on improving my marriage. Ive never lied or denied it does that also qualify as the negetive im reading from the comments here... it was the humane way to fix things rather than run away. Yes there are lors of details and such left out but as the one doing all of the lifting for us both is it wrong that i need someone to encourage me? Tbh yes we are near done and she is not doing the things the therepist (my idea) has asked. Does that still make me the bad guy
Thank you so much for sharing. I guess my question is, does the relationship you have with your friend impact your relationship??? Is your wife upset about it? does she think there are boundary issues? I definitely see the positives of seeking emotional support from someone else and I think everyone has their own reason for seeking support outside of the marriage. And people who seek support from people other than their spouse does not make them a bad person. It's not about that. It's about whether or not the relationship you have with the other person is driving you and your spouse further apart.
What if they say "but all we talk about is you when we talk"?
If they don't expect anything
I think my husband is getting his emotional fulfillment from his job and his coworkers. I have never seen him as happy as he is with his coworkers. He tries to downplay it but he's not there for me and he can't wait to get on the phone with his friends at work like he used to never work weekends but now he chooses to work weekends (from home) and stay late at work at night just to hang out with his buddies (phone calls they aren't even the same building together).
How do you explain it after 35 years I have strong feeling include gut feeling and everything is out there that she is having affair and I have not cut her in an act but all the signs are there and I afraid to ask or mention. What should I do.? She will deny what ever I say. Last I try to say something about where she was She got angry and yelling and accusing me going behind his back and .......and left me sitting around bonfire.
Should I keep track on her and follow her to get a hard evidence then confronting he or what?
I just went through the exact same thing, 20yrs of marriage & 2 kids down the drain because my husband refuses to communicate with me but makes decisions about our lives with his friends family & co-workers instead!!! At first I tried catching him in the act but honestly I just don't care anymore, he's a weak lying coward & I just want to move on with my life without ever having to see or deal with him again!!!! Some people will NEVER communicate with u because of the logical push back that forces them to take ownership of their own issues in the relationship & they have to be the victim ALWAYS!!!! Good luck to u, you're gonna need it my friend 🙋♀️
Well I tried step one he went to her and told her everything I said. And then complain to her about me. Things he never told me about.When I tried step three he said there is nothing I could do and I am a prefect wife. But I still not sure what I can do to get our relationship back. I am 69 just had my breast removed due to cancer . Andi feel like I have to be doing something wrong.Help if you can.
What if sig others won’t cut off and continues in the relationship with trying to full fill the partners conditions
Unfortunately so many who are having the emotional affair will validate it by blaming you for the reaching out to others. This is exactly why the most difficult part is not accepting the blame fully. My SO and I counseled and the counselor dodged all the questions of concern I had. The affair then gets too hard to accept, separation or worse is now in the inevitable future. They, you’re SO has to have the power to cut ties, or it will be doomed, and time forward, will be a waste of energy and emotions.
But how do you catch them ?