Bro created an account on yt and decided to drop the most thought-provoking, paradigma-shifting, yet simple to understand video on the most narrow yet widest niche in self-improvement.
extrovert social wizard techniques: 1. be funny 2. say people's names 3. make other people feel included 4. make other people feel interesting 5. use hand gestures 6. smile a lot 7. laugh at people's jokes 8. have good posture 9. look people in the eyes 10. ask people for favors 11. compliment people 12. mimic body language 13. have some mystery 14. offer empathy 15. avoid arguments 16. be a good listener but somehow be a good speaker at the same time 17. be social 18. be good looking 19. make potions to hypnotize people into liking you 20. knock out your enemies with a tennis racket 21. bring a copy of mario kart double dash to every social gathering so that only you and one other person can play at a time which makes everyone else watch jealously while you form a strong exclusivs bond with that one person, causing people to then want to talk to you to not feel left out 22. have a good pause game 23. for real tho go get "how to win friends and influence people"
the inverse is equally important: in a conversation, try to prod the person to find out what their "spike" is. assuming they actually have one, it may give you conversation material for days. you just ask questions about their thing.
Therapist here. Your comment is incredibly important context for the video. This video teaches you how to be interesting and have a personality. But I HAVE to emphasize: the thing that makes you a good conversational partner is not "being interesting" - it's "being _interested."_ Let me explain. A lot of my clients who suffer from social functioning issues feel like they have to put on a show of being interesting in order to get people to like them. But in practice, most people will just see through that tactic and think that you try too hard. You can even look self-centered if you're focused on gaining admiration and impressing people. The thing that makes you seem down to earth is the willingness to take interest in the little spikes people show you. "Oh, you like chess? Cool. How long have you been playing?" Once you pick up what the other person in a conversation is putting down, you succeed in showing them that you're interested in them for their own sake. This removes the pressure to perform and gives them more space to act naturally, which tends to make for a smoother, more enjoyable conversation. And if you're thinking about relationships, a willingness to actively listen demonstrates genuine curiosity, interest, acceptance, and emotional responsiveness - all of which are crucial foundations for any relationship. So, the best advice I can give you? Listen to other people's spikes, and explore them with genuine curiosity. Then, when prompted, share your own. This is the foundation for organic, mutually fulfilling relationships of every type. Good luck! ❤
@@Drekromancertrue, being likeable is extremely easy, all you have to do is listen and be or act interested in other people and what they have to say.
@starboiklem8381 Yes, Vileplume is my favorite Pokémon and yes, I'd love to tell you about The Else! So, for some background, They Might Be Giants is a band that's been making music success to 80s, right, and they still make music to this day period really seems a new album soon but when the my favorites is there 2007 album in the house. Now I will love you when we talk about the best they might be Gian is I believe you should pick one of the first 4. You know, the classics, and it's just the 2 main members who started the band usually those albums are there self-titled one Lincoln Flood and Apollo 18, right? But the else I don't know exactly which album is but I know it is diplomatic and whatever you want to commit, suicide or more until like someone like. The modern era of the ant vigilance really is like the thing in between between like when they've got a full band and to like a now error you know, the basically the else is different than most other albums because it hasn't much more like heavier or like aggressive tone I like as like the time period it's from you know a lot of like the aggression of that time isn't it? But there is still a lot of really great. You know, heartfelt songs in it. Some songs if I can just give like a quick summary. Could include a I'm impressed, which is like, I'm pretty sure the song is about like a dictatorship or something. Because like it's very sarcastic with like saying I'm impressed. But you know you're not actually impressed or something. And then you also got the next song. Take out trash, which is about a guy trying to tell. This girl to break up with her toxic boyfriend. And other banger, and then after that is. Yeah, after take out the trash, the next song is upside down frown. It's about someone who tells someone that they feel all emotions they feel they just don't really Express them as strongly on the outside which I kind of relate to you know, but it is also a really nice one much more chill. The next one is very much more like you know, rock heavy? I guess Climbing the Walls, it's about some dude that quits his job to start climbing this wall. Though he's just been staring at the whole time. I personally interpret it as someone like overcoming depression or some other mental thing or just feeling like stuck and stagnant in life. And you know, to finally climb that wall and actually do something about it, you know. Now the next song is Careful What You Pack, which fun fact around the time that They Might Be Giants for making The Else, They were also contacted by the makers of Coraline, you know, the movie to make songs for it. Originally, the whole thing is going to be musical, with They Might Be Giants doing whole soundtrack, but they decided not to do a whole musical cause of a lack of creative freedom or something. But one song did make it in. Was the other father's song. Which is sung by John Linnell, one of the singers for They Might Be Giants. So that is fun, but Careful What You Pack was originally intended for it. But it's now on The Else and it is a really good song. It's much more chill, you know, it's about like a girl, Who went into a new town and getting into trouble or danger. You know very Coraline, after Careful What You Pack , the next song is The Cap'm, which is about some guy who is very full of himself and calls himself the cap'm even though he doesn't have a boat, after this song, the next is With the Dark and the song is less one song and more kind of like 3 songs in 1 it's kinda like Fingertips from Apollo 18, but it's all just 3 segments and just all 1 song, but it pretty much it starts off kind of slow. You know, similar to Careful What You Pack, but then it goes into like a very sea shantyish kind of tune in the middle, and it gets like very energetic and hyper at the end. And then you know it ends and it's a really good one. I don't know exactly what it's about, but it's a fun one! Next up is The Shadow Government, which is a song about this dude, who thinks he's getting chased down by the government, and he's like very paranoid about it, and it's overall like a fun song of just events that kind of escalate, and just get more and more surreal. And it is overall a real fun one. Up next is my personal favorite song off the album Bee of the Bird of the Moth, which is about this type of Moth called the hummingbird Moth, which tries to mimic a bee hummingbird, which is a hummingbird that's about the size of a bee. You know it's about how weird and messed up this creature is and the song has a whole bunch of other weird things in it, you know, and it's overall, just like a real great weird song just what TMBG is kind of known for you know. Overall, it sounds like it could come off of one of their first 3 albums. Also, it has a style-o-phone in it, which is pretty neat. Next is a song called Withered Hope, which is about this guy named Sad Sack that's in love with a girl named Withered Hope and how you know she will never be in like love with him or something. You know, and it's a real fun, actually, I wouldn't say it's actually fun, really. But it is a good song. You know, and it's even got like what a love pentagon in it, so it is very fun and catchy. Next is a contrecoup, and it's about some football player dude, who when trying to impress someone, probably like a girl or something. Gets a very bad brain injury called a contrecoup where his brain hits one side of his head and then the other side, it's like a concussion but worse, and it's just about how it's like you know, affecting him Actually, this was a song that John Linnell, the writer of it was challenged to make on a radio show where he had to make a song that had 3 specific words in it at some point and the 3 words were contrecoup, crainiosophic and limerant. Overall it is a very fun song and I like it a lot. Second to last is Feign Amnesia, which is about a guy who feigns amnesia for some reason, I don't really know why there's theories on why, but it's still a good song you know. Last but certainly not least, is The Mesopotamians, which is a song about a bunch of ancient Mesopotamian figures and legends, you know, all being in a band and touring around ancient Mesopotamia and it's a really great closer to a really great album. And it's also super fun to listen to. But yeah, overall, if Anyone who's looking to get into TMBG I would recommend this album a whole bunch, it's overall, a really great album and it's just, you know, I like it a lot. Thank you for listening to my ramblings. This was made of like the voice to text thing so if there's any errors or typos, just let me know. But other than that, thank you. =)
He experts in explaining his hobbies, you see. He is an expert in sharing experiences, not being crafty and snooky too. He genuinely sat along with you guys to come up with ways on the topic "how to be yourself". He has been there too. And he understands you. Cool.
I’m reminded of that funny line ‘’You don’t have to run faster than the bear, just outrun the guy next to you.” With most things, if you can consistently do them a few mins daily for just 6 months, you’re already better at it than the average. In a year or 2, you’d be far better than anyone in your area. Ofcourse there are many exceptions to this, but generally this holds true for most skills. Because most people quit within a month and those that continue usually stop trying to progress further once they reach a level they can get by with. I learned this fact by accident. I was in the worst point of my life about 3 years back. It was so bad that when I wanted to start changing my life out of desperation, the only habit that felt remotely doable for me was “wake up daily by x time” Started around 7am to 5:30am in a few months. And just to be able to do that consistently, I had to learn a lot about optimal sleep, time scheduling, exercise & diet hours, foods to avoid around evenings, etc. Cos of that, I slowly came to be known as the “podcast guy” “self-help geek” as that was all I listened to and talked about. Initially my friends/family were just flabbergasted by my new “hobby” and it became an amusement for them to talk about. But after they noticed me waking up early for almost a year, some of them actually started complimenting me for it, even asking for tips indirectly 😅 Best thing is, this single habit became, and still is, the cornerstone for many other more impactful ones. When I started, I would have never thought that someday a lazy piece of sht like me would be asked for serious advice on “How to exercise & sleep better”. Not to mention, for the serial procrastinator just 3 years back to be called a “discipline freak” today. Never sell yourself short friends. NEVER. You won’t know until you’ve sincerely tried for atleast a year.
@@easyactually Great video. Imo I also think that ppl that say "Just be yourself" are not only extroverts but also good looking as well lol. Halo effect is powerful.
this is exactly why i love making friends with autistic people, they know SO MUCH about a couple unusual topics and can go on and on about it, making them interesting.
I sometimes meet people that actually do wanna hear about my special interests and it's always so surprising 😅 I'm always like "I'm rambling, sorry" and once in a while there's somebody that will be like "No, I like hearing about it!" and that honestly takes me back because I actually kinda don't believe them haha. I'm used to people tolerating it rather than appreciating it. I mean, folks don't typically appreciate a 30 minute rant about the history of rhythm gaming, and understandably so, but I just know SO MUCH and I absolutely love rhythm games so how could I not?
Personality is not your hobbies, favourite movie, interest, music taste ect. Your personality is how you percieve reality and your interactions and attitude towards certian situations, or how you interact with others.
My bruddah in the video very obviously is using a specific definition of the word different from your definition, and that's what the video is about and he makes that pretty clear. He defined it well
@@gregothy9190And that's fine, I don't think anyone means disrespect. But it's still important to throw this out there because of how searches work. This is more about how your social image rather than your inner personality or core beliefs. If we allow the perception of ourselves be dictated solely by how other people perceive us, that can make us miserable and too eager to please others.
@@philipramirez5406i think what links this video to your core self/personality is the communication of it. you are a person with your own inner world with thoughts and ideas that you have cultivated or gathered over time. some people have a hard time communicating because small talk is hard, or social interactions and cues are hard. i think this is what he means by getting your foot in the door. once you create a social connection with someone, because you can talk a little easier with that someone, your personality can be seen more after getting over that hurdle. hobbies and interests are what we talk about because it can show what we respond to. they can broadcast our personality through the act of doing something you like or are into
I kinda hate how having a personality and having interests gets conflated online. Like, everyone has a personality. But what people actually want is to be interesting, which is where having interests becomes important. You can have a ton of interests and still have a shitty personality, you can also be a great person without many interesting things to talk about. Ideally, you have a bit of both. But they're definitely not the same.
agree, but its much easier meeting people halfway than saying "ackchyually everyone has a personality, what you want is to be interesting" because to be good at this thing called at the internet you have to observe how a word is used instead of what it means
Ur prob not gonna like to hear this but you're not gonna be that interesting by reciting some shit you saw on national geographic. You only become really interesting when you've lived life on the edge and taken crazy risks and dedicated yourself to something thats bigger than yourself. And it takes years to get to that point so honestly a short term solution for becoming interesting imo is just "looksmaxxing". And ur prob not gonna like to hear that but the reality is that if your in good shape and attractive, its very easy to "be interesting" assuming you have a shred of confidence and conviction when you speak.
@@dorikin333I feel like you didn’t understand what he was saying in the video entirely. It’s not just having a niche interest or random facts, it’s about having the interest and being able to present it in a way that others can relate to or follow. Being a risk taker can give you those topics to talk about but that isn’t the only way.
0:53 "bring a copy of mario kart double dash" this is an excellent strategy, for mario kart double dash is an impeccable game that will lead to a great time to be had by everyone involved
someone should make a tier list for them.. haha S-Tiers for me are definitely Amateur Cryptozoology, Dream journalling, esoteric programming languages practicing and ghost town exploration
After u gave the cleaning example I realized I am STACKED with personality bc I LOVE researching productive things and trying them. Like nutrition, parenting tips, non toxic, healthiest life, decor, budgeting, farming, gardening. Like I have a new favorite thing every week but it’s always those things
0:42 "That's just extrovert propaganda..." As an extrovert, I cannot help but think you are right. 😅 You can't start a conversation by saying: "I'm just myself."
Talented extroverts are the unconsciously competent who've even forgotten the skills they're competent at, which is why they're sometimes bad sources of social advice. (Not an attack on you, just to be clear!)
But what you can say is "Hey...I'm really bad at people...can I get some help?" Edit: To clarify, you are being truthful (being yourself) and you have done the thing you struggle to do....start a conversation.
@@crysiscontained4421 Eh, not the best approach, honestly. Starting a conversation while asking for help could put a lot of psychological burden on somebody else. Especially if you are meeting someone for the first time.
I came upon the last video just by chance and watched everything else. It’s a solid channel that can grab your attention from the start and hold onto it from beginning to end. If the quality is-at bare minimum-maintained or manages to increase, then steady channel growth is more than expected. That was kind of long-winded but what I really mean to say is Keep up the good work, you’re doing great.
cleaning was a really good example to start conversations with as an interest. Because as for me, it would be writing which.. can be identified as “boring.” It really made me think if people asked there’s actually a lot of interesting things I can talk about. I’m an introvert so this was really easy to digest, thanks a lot
Writing is super interesting, provided you're actually writing something, but I think it gets a boring image because a hell of a lot of writers actually don't write much at all, they're too busy rewriting things they've already written because they're perfectionists.
great, this is how self-improvement videos should look like on youtube. Short and straight to the point so after watching the video you can actually try the advice.
Watching this video, I was thinking that this was all pretty obvious, I was also thinking about the irony that autistic people’s habit of ‘infodumping’ is considered by some to be sourced from their social awkwardness but it’s actually an interesting and effective way to start a conversation (which I already knew but it’s nice to hear someone confirm it). Then I realized that while it’s easy to start conversations about my interests, it often takes a weird amount of extra effort to get the person I’m talking to to talk about their own interests in any level of detail, I ask them what they’re hobbies are and they.. say maybe one thing they like and.. don’t really elaborate unless I ask them to and even then it’s usually about a sentence long without much to respond to. As a result most of my conversations when meeting someone new are about me and while I do like talking about myself and things that I like I would also appreciate if the other person considered that when I ask questions about them it’s because I’m trying to prompt them so that I can get to know them and not.. I don’t know why else they think I would be asking them. Me: So.. have you read any good books lately? Them: No, I don’t really read all that often. Silence. Me: Any particular TV Shows you like? Them: I’m not really into TV Shows. Silence. Me: So, have you heard about Wings of Fire? It’s this book series about dragons- * continues talking about this until one of us has to leave * I mean even if someone in a conversation asks me a question I don’t have an interesting answer to like ‘I don’t really watch stuff like that’ or something I at least take their question as a sign that they’re interested in listening to me and change the topic to something I have more to say about. Like, let’s reimagine that scenario except I’m the one being asked questions. Me: So.. have you read any good books lately? Me (as Them): No, I don’t really read all that often. I spend a lot of my free time with my pets, I have two dogs and one cat. Me: Oh, really? What are their names? Me (as Them): * proceeds to talk about my (as their) pets *
You literally described my biggest issue with conversations, and the examples are sooo on point. I don't wanna be talking about myself the entire time so if I ask you a question can you please elaborate ㅠㅠ I don't wanna be interviewing you, we wanna be having a conversation, back and forth *sigh*
i want to talk about my interests but theyre like,, super sus? like some of the communities im in are known for having pedos and weirdos,, and i have a book series im really into but the worldbuilding is so complex idek how to get into it it's so awkward like good lord you have to learn alternative science and world history from the wiki to even begin to explain that trashfire😭 the only thing that's been surprisingly effective in the context of this vid is nerding out over maths and geography like you would not believe how many people are interested in how medecin won a olympic medal in architecture for monaco and it's the only one they have but it isnt even official bc the ioc doesnt recognize art competition medals anymore but i want to talk about the other stuff too yk??? but like my personality cannot be 'i like the niue flag and i think the base e counting system is funny' so i just end up just saying 'uhhh i used to read but i dont now wbu' when people ask about my hobbies bc i dont want to be weird about it,, this vid gives me confidence to start talking about it though literally shifted my perspective on things like i hate hate hate small talk and self introductions (such as things like 'oh do you like such and such generic activity? what shows do you watch?' its so tedious i have no interest in talking about things we're both disinterested in) and 'getting to know new people' but if i can avoid all that by telling them about weird shit i like and listening to the weird shit they like then that's great
I think it’s because, in my opinion, they don’t need to be that long. When I hear you, I don’t care about your life story. It feels forced when you push it on to someone new.
Great video! I have been obsessed with flowers since I was a little girl... it's been my personality for decades now! I'm a member of all the local tulip, gardenia, rose and orchid clubs!
I actually do have a flower question, i know i can look online but the information is not all the same. My GF gets me some beautiful roses on special occasions however i cannot for the life of me take care of the properly. It upsets me because i want to take care of them to show my gratitude and appreciation for the gift. What would you suggest be a good routine to care for roses so the have a healthy life. @chelseaf.3352
That's something I'm also very interested in! ^^ When it comes to flowers, I specifically know the symbolism and cultural meaning behind some of them :D ( May be a little different in terms of your knowledge on flowers, I assume you likely meant how to take care of them and maybe possibly where they originated from? Which is still awesome as well :^ ) Idk as much about that, but I do know where Higanbana (that's the Japanese word for Red Spider Lily, I'm learning Japanese sooo) originated from (As far as I'm aware they originated from China and were imported to Japan, there is also a festival held in Hidaka (A city in Japan) called 'The Kinchakuda Red Spider Lily Festival' as well, and the ones that grow there were apparently found growing naturally. It's thought that the seeds had somehow traveled upstream and then grew scattered around that area - I have no idea how nature does that- Because the conditions were good enough for the flowers to grow, they started blooming every autumn like they naturally would, but it's a lot of coincidences that need to happen in order for a plant to grow in an area it wasn't previously found naturally blooming in.) I could honestly talk about this flower for a while... (Sorry for the rant, Ig my comment can sorta work as showing a way you can talk about a topic. Like instead of just asking you about elaborating on what you mean, I specified to what type of knowledge you have in flowers (Like the assumption I made that it may be how to take care of them, etc.) And if it's a different sort of knowledge on them that's ok too :> If we were having an in person conversation right now maybe you would've elaborated and talked about what you know or have learned about flowers, then I could have asked if you'd like to know more about what I know about them. :) Any hobbies or knowledge you have linked to places/cultures also seems to interest people a lot, the amount of people I've met interested in Cultural Anthropology (The study of how culture affects people and their lives) and not being aware of it that I've met irl is hilarious! /neu This also then allows me to talk about what Cultural Anthropology is, and a specific anthropological study I find really interesting - to vaguely explain that, it's about this place in extreme conditions which caused people in a community to not feel or experience anger. But that's a little off topic from your comment, so I'll leave that rant there x) (Still kept this part of my comment as I think it's relevant to the video to some extent) This has made me realise I actually do have a decent amount of topics I can talk about :'D Still have no idea how to link my other interests to the boardgame 'Blood On The Clocktower' though T~T ( I think being able to link your different interests, like a transition phase in the conversation to another topic you have a lot of knowledge on, can help keeping a conversation going.)
this makes sense. I've seen many videos of mundane topic and never even once said that it was boring looking at it, instead always admired the guys for their skills and genius in videos.
Bigges tthing that somebody pointed out is personality isn't really defined by your interests, but rather I'd say it influences what you're interests are, what you're good at and just how you come off to people, so to your point, if someone is really dedicated to a few particular things that will come off in conversation with them, and in some of your examples its the first thing people see. But usually the first thing people see is what you look, sound like, what you display liking, and to me the most important part of ur personality is just the way you interact with people. It's definitely boosted by having confidence in something u do but yeah, somewhat different but also great video. My biggest problem is picking one thing unless it's school rn lol 💀.
I genuinely thought you were an already established TH-camr because your titles and whole video concepts seem so appealing, this is gonna blow up for sure. Nice work dude keep it up!!
Just wanted to let you know that this was a great video and that I really liked the style and humour.(Not to make you feel trapped in a video style already) You just got a new subscriber 😊
all the clever intertwined jokes oh my god… “good pause game” + “..well there’s no chairs either” + even the subscribe joke lmfao you are so Clever you are 100% going places
watching this was fun! i've had an underlying lack of self image for a while since i graduated high school around the end of lockdowns in my area. Feeling left behind and not as capable as other ppl in their early 20s and wondering if i should try changing how i act to feel a sense of fitting in easier. Got diagnosed autistic and I have been learning to remind myself that i quite literally am neurologically different from my peers and even if i wasnt, everyone matures and junk at different rates. Seriously this is a nice and wholesome reminder that you're just you and other people DO see you.
1:37 was really impactful for me. Some of my favorite people to work with aren't particularly interesting, but they do have a strong characteristic that makes them more fun to talk to than others. I've followed advice similar to yours recently and instead of hiding all of my "boring" hobbies, I've just embraced letting the world know about my borderline-autistic, niche world. I think it makes me weirder than most people but paradoxically I get way more smiles and friendly engagement from others. All without switching teams to extroversion. Nice video my dude.
I know this is your very first video that was posted literally one day ago, but before I saw your subscriber/view count, I thought I was watching a 100+ thousand view video of some popular youtuber. Really good, insightful, well made video. Subscribed.
just be yourself meaning your personality is how you see and experience the world, how you react to things, what you like and dislike, how you interact with other people, what excited you, etc
this really just dissolves down to, learn about something till you know a little bit more than everyone else, and explain it to people in a way THEY can digest it
Man this video was actually really helpful and even made me realize I already have a decent personality I just need to hone it in, your channel's going to blow up bro
WOW, dude I love your videos. You're so creative. So many things I could comment on. Like for example at 3:33 juxtaposing the dial tone with the social proof?? Amazing idea. Holy crap. Great job!! No wonder you're blowing up.
This is the first video that inspired me to leave a comment like this. I started learning English on TH-cam, and this video feels like a gift. It gives me time to ponder what interests me and now I know the key parts that I should cultivate! Thanks a lot ❤
As I can see, you´ve got a great idea for a YT channel and a very good way of doing it. You´ve got a plan, and I respect that. I am looking forward to your next vids.
Cleaning is actually very interesting and very necessary. Everyone has to do it to some degree, it's very relatable & useful. I actually avoid talking about some of my interests 😅 so I guess I'm choosing to have less personality. But I have too many interests so it works out.
Bro your content is the content that actually helps! Don't every stop making...now you are that lovable channel of mine who almost nobody knows about. And it's cool to have one like that.
The one part that seems sus is "it can literally be anything". I think less common and/or more specific interests get more personality points. I love video games, but if I meet a total stranger and the first thing they say is "I like video games", then internally I'm like "pfft, what a nerd". Minecraft is more specific. Better. Cleaning is uncommon. Even better. The topic may be less interesting, but that person is more interesting. I love your videos so far! (I just found your channel.) You shine a refreshing take on topics that other people just beat to death, lol
Doesn't it just come back to having the social skills to make your interests sound interesting? Nobody ever seems to care about what I am interested in.
this was an awesome vid! this kind of made my evening seeing something so light and also pretty interesting. I really needed this reminder, sometimes we overcomplicate things and honestly everyone needs some simplicity in everyday life
My biggest problem with this is: what do I do when interacting with people in the same niche? If I come up to my mom's elementary school teacher friends, draw a detailed world map and name every capital in Europe, they'll be very impressed. But if I tell my uni classmates in International Relations "hey, did you know Bolivia used to have a coastline, but lost it during a war against Chile?" they'll be like "yeah I knew that" and it's no longer my stand out trait because everyone else around me is also savvy in the same things ._.
"It took me 4 years to draw like the masters of the Renaissance but a lifetime to learn how to draw like a child again." -Pablo Picasso That applies to more than just art.
@@yurisei6732 It ain't even that deep man. A good advice is good advice regardless from who it comes from. I don't even know s*** about Pablo but I know that's a good piece from experience.
I like dancing, but almost every time I try to talk about that, everyone is just like "Well, I can't dance", and then immediately stop the conversation.
Tell them why you like it or how you started learning and who you look up to... I think some people like to feel included, so if you find a way to include them even though they don't share our preferred topic, they'll open up and appreciate it.
I love this perspective! It's so true that getting a personality doesn't have to be complicated. When I embraced my quirky interest in collecting vintage board games, it opened up so many fun conversations. Navigating social situations can be tough, especially when humor is involved-like when my game nights lead to accidental laughter over ridiculous game rules. I recently joined the Sense of Humor Improvement Program by Habit10x, which taught me how to weave humor into my interests, making interactions more engaging. So, find that unique passion and share it confidently; you'll be surprised at how interesting it makes you!
Ngl when I was recommended this vid by the algorithm I assumed that you had like at least 3 mill subs Your style is great and your format is amazing, your channel will blow up I’m sure
Tips for people, because I have a personality: you don't even have to be that good at your "spike" to be noticeable. I am shit at birding (couple days ago I called a kestrel a sharp shinned I am so cooked), but I know that I am better at it than 99% of the population, so birder is one of my personality traits. You don't have to be good at something, you just have to be super invested in it and have lots of random knowledge. I think it also helps to do something unique, some people be like "my hobby is driving while listening to music" I don't care if you are the best driver in the world, that is really boring. Or, if your "spike" is really boring, make it sound interesting! You like drawing, ok so do a lot of people, but what especially do you draw? What is your style? What are your drawing hot takes? Make it about you. Also, this is kind of adressed in the video, but don't be afraid to be weird, I am weird (Im a weirdo, I don't... fit in *scoffs*) (for real tho no sane person has five pebbles as their pfp, I'm sorry its true), I have weird hobbies and interests, but this is what gives me a personality. Sometimes people are scared away by this (cowards), but this just helps me weed out who I don't vibe with.
Pro tip for anyone who's a half decent story-teller: Try to very casually drop information that will invite questions during a conversation and when the questions come, share a particularly wacky and memorable story about yourself. For example, I might mention "Ferdinand" and when people ask who he is, I can say "Oh, he's a dead subway rat I extracted the skull from" and then go into a fuller version of the story (which is pretty entertaining imo). This way people remember me as the dead rat girl :)
I really find this video so good and informative. I subscribed and saved this video for another watch, gotta take notes cuz I am so introvert that when I talk to a colleague after not seeing them for a long time I start to mumble and say the weirdest things.
Great video! My takeaway from it is: showing people how _you interact with your interests_ gives you personality. Cleaning? is an interest. 'remembering' cleaning techniques, 'seeking' cleaning opportunities: that's a personality. It's like the difference between drink mixing (interest) and bartendering (personality). Even a robot can mix drinks (hell, they can serve up cocktails even.) But getting into bartendering means you're a real, breathing person. It means you find being a bartender fun, spend time from your limited lifespan looking up bartendering, and welcome the idea of making people drinks.
me during the entire video: OHHH THAT MAKE SENSE! I do not have anything I am really good with. I love to do so much things , end up do not know my real passion or hobby. That's why I have problem in explaining my hobby etc. I think im gonna try this method. Thank youu!
@@dhans2881 lmao like, "I derive profound satisfaction in engaging in contemplative reverie, fixating my gaze upon the silent narratives embedded within the artistic nature of walls during moments of leisure."
Omg you just made me realize all the time I spent looking for a picture of a spike to use just get weird sharp objects that weren't what I wanted, I literally could have just searched for a pointy cone
Hmm. I needed to hear this! But it's so hard to keep the niche thing that I love understandable. I love diving into the nitty gritty of a topic. Maybe it's good to learn the layman's understanding of said topic too?
My issue is hyperfixating on something and then moving onto another. I can never maintain a hobby or truly be passionate about anything because I hate the idea of being restricted to 1 thing for the sake of having a hobby or being passionate about it so I fall out of love with it and move on.
personality is also identified by traits like how someone reacts to specific situations whether he his calm, panicked etc sometimes its just your upbringing some people find my way of speaking cool¯\_(ツ)_/¯for no reason what i want to say is some people have naturally cool personalities despite not having such interests i guess we are the unlucky ones (T_T)
I agree with this, personality is more than your interests, as someone that went through a "personality crisis" really your personality is just the way you think about things and approach the world. But developing your own interests is still important, it's just also important not to conflate interests with personality. Because when you realize you don't like the thing so much anymore, you might feel like you're losing your personality when it never really was your personality in the first place. I recommend meditations, such as going on walks or bike rides, turning off the music in your car if you drive, taking off your headphones if you take public transportation, etc. It will give you time to reflect, and that time to reflect is very important for learning who you are. Yes, learning. Many of us need to discover or re-discover our personalities after it's been shoved to the wayside through so much social media doomscrolling.
Great video! I've been struggling with this for a while now. I am blown away by the video quality, I really couldn't have guessed that this was your first video. Happy to be your 127th subscriber :)
I came from the trolly problem video. I did not expect to get a confidence boost. I genuinely feel better about myself even though I haven’t checked if this works at all. Thanks.
I’ve found that this is a good first step and then slowly learning to present the information with humour you like and other extroverted type traits is a good way to develop
I'm so glad that you mentioned the importance of this on college applications. People think that to get into an Ivy League you need a perfect GPA, test scores, and extracurriculars. The reality is that you not only need that stuff, but you also need to be unique, have some wild specialization in something that makes them say, "Wow, this would be a fascinating person to have on campus."
Bro created an account on yt and decided to drop the most thought-provoking, paradigma-shifting, yet simple to understand video on the most narrow yet widest niche in self-improvement.
I appreciate you calling it paradigm shifting,that's pretty cool
@@easyactuallythank you for this video
this advice is not just paradigma shifting or thought provoking. this advice is literally reality-bending
@@easyactuallyit did shift the paradigm that I had of personality. Super cool!
fr
i feel like a robot trying to be an actuall human
I wish I felt that way. Robots can emulate people easily. I feel more like a rock trying to be human…
I feel exactly like invader zim
Same
As someone on the spectrum.... *Sigh*
Same here bro. I feel like trying to install new software lol
"Reading up on the latest cleaning lore" you got me there dude.
Had me rolling
That was funny because I've actually been watching a lot of Midwest Magic Cleaning's videos lately
when you said "the subscribe button looks really inticing" at 4:00 the button started glowing and shit and it was really enticing so i subscribed
The subscribe button was talking to me, I needed to press it 👁👄👁
Your comment popped up when he said that 👀
extrovert social wizard techniques:
1. be funny
2. say people's names
3. make other people feel included
4. make other people feel interesting
5. use hand gestures
6. smile a lot
7. laugh at people's jokes
8. have good posture
9. look people in the eyes
10. ask people for favors
11. compliment people
12. mimic body language
13. have some mystery
14. offer empathy
15. avoid arguments
16. be a good listener but somehow be a good speaker at the same time
17. be social
18. be good looking
19. make potions to hypnotize people into liking you
20. knock out your enemies with a tennis racket
21. bring a copy of mario kart double dash to every social gathering so that only you and one other person can play at a time which makes everyone else watch jealously while you form a strong exclusivs bond with that one person, causing people to then want to talk to you to not feel left out
22. have a good pause game
23. for real tho go get "how to win friends and influence people"
@@Rended_ not from an introvert
Why do extroverts have this habit of always offending and underestimating others tho?
bro.? Good pause game? 💀
But, Do we need to be extrovert?
Seriously though, Is the book useful?
the inverse is equally important: in a conversation, try to prod the person to find out what their "spike" is. assuming they actually have one, it may give you conversation material for days. you just ask questions about their thing.
Therapist here. Your comment is incredibly important context for the video. This video teaches you how to be interesting and have a personality. But I HAVE to emphasize: the thing that makes you a good conversational partner is not "being interesting" - it's "being _interested."_
Let me explain. A lot of my clients who suffer from social functioning issues feel like they have to put on a show of being interesting in order to get people to like them. But in practice, most people will just see through that tactic and think that you try too hard. You can even look self-centered if you're focused on gaining admiration and impressing people. The thing that makes you seem down to earth is the willingness to take interest in the little spikes people show you.
"Oh, you like chess? Cool. How long have you been playing?"
Once you pick up what the other person in a conversation is putting down, you succeed in showing them that you're interested in them for their own sake. This removes the pressure to perform and gives them more space to act naturally, which tends to make for a smoother, more enjoyable conversation. And if you're thinking about relationships, a willingness to actively listen demonstrates genuine curiosity, interest, acceptance, and emotional responsiveness - all of which are crucial foundations for any relationship.
So, the best advice I can give you? Listen to other people's spikes, and explore them with genuine curiosity. Then, when prompted, share your own. This is the foundation for organic, mutually fulfilling relationships of every type. Good luck! ❤
@@Drekromancertrue, being likeable is extremely easy, all you have to do is listen and be or act interested in other people and what they have to say.
I wish someone would do this with me, I could go on for 2 hours on why 'The Else' is the best TMBG album
@@Vileplume87 you could tell me if you want, also is your name based on the pokemon vileplume or am i reaching?
@starboiklem8381 Yes, Vileplume is my favorite Pokémon and yes, I'd love to tell you about The Else! So, for some background, They Might Be Giants is a band that's been making music success to 80s, right, and they still make music to this day period really seems a new album soon but when the my favorites is there 2007 album in the house. Now I will love you when we talk about the best they might be Gian is I believe you should pick one of the first 4. You know, the classics, and it's just the 2 main members who started the band usually those albums are there self-titled one Lincoln Flood and Apollo 18, right? But the else I don't know exactly which album is but I know it is diplomatic and whatever you want to commit, suicide or more until like someone like. The modern era of the ant vigilance really is like the thing in between between like when they've got a full band and to like a now error you know, the basically the else is different than most other albums because it hasn't much more like heavier or like aggressive tone I like as like the time period it's from you know a lot of like the aggression of that time isn't it? But there is still a lot of really great. You know, heartfelt songs in it. Some songs if I can just give like a quick summary. Could include a I'm impressed, which is like, I'm pretty sure the song is about like a dictatorship or something. Because like it's very sarcastic with like saying I'm impressed. But you know you're not actually impressed or something. And then you also got the next song. Take out trash, which is about a guy trying to tell. This girl to break up with her toxic boyfriend. And other banger, and then after that is. Yeah, after take out the trash, the next song is upside down frown. It's about someone who tells someone that they feel all emotions they feel they just don't really Express them as strongly on the outside which I kind of relate to you know, but it is also a really nice one much more chill. The next one is very much more like you know, rock heavy? I guess Climbing the Walls, it's about some dude that quits his job to start climbing this wall. Though he's just been staring at the whole time. I personally interpret it as someone like overcoming depression or some other mental thing or just feeling like stuck and stagnant in life. And you know, to finally climb that wall and actually do something about it, you know. Now the next song is Careful What You Pack, which fun fact around the time that They Might Be Giants for making The Else, They were also contacted by the makers of Coraline, you know, the movie to make songs for it. Originally, the whole thing is going to be musical, with They Might Be Giants doing whole soundtrack, but they decided not to do a whole musical cause of a lack of creative freedom or something. But one song did make it in. Was the other father's song. Which is sung by John Linnell, one of the singers for They Might Be Giants. So that is fun, but Careful What You Pack was originally intended for it. But it's now on The Else and it is a really good song. It's much more chill, you know, it's about like a girl, Who went into a new town and getting into trouble or danger. You know very Coraline, after Careful What You Pack , the next song is The Cap'm, which is about some guy who is very full of himself and calls himself the cap'm even though he doesn't have a boat, after this song, the next is With the Dark and the song is less one song and more kind of like 3 songs in 1 it's kinda like Fingertips from Apollo 18, but it's all just 3 segments and just all 1 song, but it pretty much it starts off kind of slow. You know, similar to Careful What You Pack, but then it goes into like a very sea shantyish kind of tune in the middle, and it gets like very energetic and hyper at the end. And then you know it ends and it's a really good one. I don't know exactly what it's about, but it's a fun one! Next up is The Shadow Government, which is a song about this dude, who thinks he's getting chased down by the government, and he's like very paranoid about it, and it's overall like a fun song of just events that kind of escalate, and just get more and more surreal. And it is overall a real fun one. Up next is my personal favorite song off the album Bee of the Bird of the Moth, which is about this type of Moth called the hummingbird Moth, which tries to mimic a bee hummingbird, which is a hummingbird that's about the size of a bee. You know it's about how weird and messed up this creature is and the song has a whole bunch of other weird things in it, you know, and it's overall, just like a real great weird song just what TMBG is kind of known for you know. Overall, it sounds like it could come off of one of their first 3 albums. Also, it has a style-o-phone in it, which is pretty neat. Next is a song called Withered Hope, which is about this guy named Sad Sack that's in love with a girl named Withered Hope and how you know she will never be in like love with him or something. You know, and it's a real fun, actually, I wouldn't say it's actually fun, really. But it is a good song. You know, and it's even got like what a love pentagon in it, so it is very fun and catchy. Next is a contrecoup, and it's about some football player dude, who when trying to impress someone, probably like a girl or something. Gets a very bad brain injury called a contrecoup where his brain hits one side of his head and then the other side, it's like a concussion but worse, and it's just about how it's like you know, affecting him Actually, this was a song that John Linnell, the writer of it was challenged to make on a radio show where he had to make a song that had 3 specific words in it at some point and the 3 words were contrecoup, crainiosophic and limerant. Overall it is a very fun song and I like it a lot. Second to last is Feign Amnesia, which is about a guy who feigns amnesia for some reason, I don't really know why there's theories on why, but it's still a good song you know. Last but certainly not least, is The Mesopotamians, which is a song about a bunch of ancient Mesopotamian figures and legends, you know, all being in a band and touring around ancient Mesopotamia and it's a really great closer to a really great album. And it's also super fun to listen to. But yeah, overall, if Anyone who's looking to get into TMBG I would recommend this album a whole bunch, it's overall, a really great album and it's just, you know, I like it a lot. Thank you for listening to my ramblings. This was made of like the voice to text thing so if there's any errors or typos, just let me know. But other than that, thank you. =)
He actually managed to make cleaning seem fun, I almost feel like cleaning my room and stuff
I love it when videos give actual specific tips, not just the "be yourself" type. Makes me feel less lost
He experts in explaining his hobbies, you see. He is an expert in sharing experiences, not being crafty and snooky too. He genuinely sat along with you guys to come up with ways on the topic "how to be yourself". He has been there too. And he understands you. Cool.
I’m reminded of that funny line ‘’You don’t have to run faster than the bear, just outrun the guy next to you.” With most things, if you can consistently do them a few mins daily for just 6 months, you’re already better at it than the average. In a year or 2, you’d be far better than anyone in your area.
Ofcourse there are many exceptions to this, but generally this holds true for most skills.
Because most people quit within a month and those that continue usually stop trying to progress further once they reach a level they can get by with.
I learned this fact by accident. I was in the worst point of my life about 3 years back. It was so bad that when I wanted to start changing my life out of desperation, the only habit that felt remotely doable for me was “wake up daily by x time”
Started around 7am to 5:30am in a few months. And just to be able to do that consistently, I had to learn a lot about optimal sleep, time scheduling, exercise & diet hours, foods to avoid around evenings, etc. Cos of that, I slowly came to be known as the “podcast guy” “self-help geek” as that was all I listened to and talked about.
Initially my friends/family were just flabbergasted by my new “hobby” and it became an amusement for them to talk about.
But after they noticed me waking up early for almost a year, some of them actually started complimenting me for it, even asking for tips indirectly 😅
Best thing is, this single habit became, and still is, the cornerstone for many other more impactful ones.
When I started, I would have never thought that someday a lazy piece of sht like me would be asked for serious advice on “How to exercise & sleep better”. Not to mention, for the serial procrastinator just 3 years back to be called a “discipline freak” today.
Never sell yourself short friends. NEVER.
You won’t know until you’ve sincerely tried for atleast a year.
Damn. That was shockingly insightful and well done. This channel is going places.
tryx3651, that's a high honor 👌
@@easyactually Great video. Imo I also think that ppl that say "Just be yourself" are not only extroverts but also good looking as well lol. Halo effect is powerful.
Do you have autism? Genuine question.
Yea man. This seems easy, actually.
Normal conversations about how the subscribe button looks really enticing sometimes. Literally the best subscribe joke I've ever heard.
I even almost stopped to subscribe cause of it
and in that exact time some rainbow outline appeared, incredible
Thought i was tripping when i saw that, how did he do that wtf
That's some advanced mind control shit right there.
How?😢
this is exactly why i love making friends with autistic people, they know SO MUCH about a couple unusual topics and can go on and on about it, making them interesting.
I sometimes meet people that actually do wanna hear about my special interests and it's always so surprising 😅 I'm always like "I'm rambling, sorry" and once in a while there's somebody that will be like "No, I like hearing about it!" and that honestly takes me back because I actually kinda don't believe them haha. I'm used to people tolerating it rather than appreciating it. I mean, folks don't typically appreciate a 30 minute rant about the history of rhythm gaming, and understandably so, but I just know SO MUCH and I absolutely love rhythm games so how could I not?
@@Cobalt985 Videos about topics like those get plenty of views, of course there'd be peeps interested ^^
literally im obsessed with birthdays and birthday personality and i know over 600 and i would go on for hours about it if i could
@@bysscanna what kinda birthdays? like celebrity or historical figure?
@@meg.h. basically anyone. my friends, celebrities, historical figures, fictional characters. it doesn't matter who it is i will just remember it
Personality is not your hobbies, favourite movie, interest, music taste ect. Your personality is how you percieve reality and your interactions and attitude towards certian situations, or how you interact with others.
easy, actually
My bruddah in the video very obviously is using a specific definition of the word different from your definition, and that's what the video is about and he makes that pretty clear. He defined it well
@@gregothy9190And that's fine, I don't think anyone means disrespect. But it's still important to throw this out there because of how searches work.
This is more about how your social image rather than your inner personality or core beliefs. If we allow the perception of ourselves be dictated solely by how other people perceive us, that can make us miserable and too eager to please others.
@gregothy9190 that's not really fair for people who use words correctly, though.
@@philipramirez5406i think what links this video to your core self/personality is the communication of it. you are a person with your own inner world with thoughts and ideas that you have cultivated or gathered over time. some people have a hard time communicating because small talk is hard, or social interactions and cues are hard. i think this is what he means by getting your foot in the door. once you create a social connection with someone, because you can talk a little easier with that someone, your personality can be seen more after getting over that hurdle.
hobbies and interests are what we talk about because it can show what we respond to. they can broadcast our personality through the act of doing something you like or are into
I like trains
Ooooh great, so what do u know abt them?
Cool can you tell me a train fact?
i miss asdf
Cool, me too!
I know nothing about trains, but I would love to know
I kinda hate how having a personality and having interests gets conflated online. Like, everyone has a personality. But what people actually want is to be interesting, which is where having interests becomes important. You can have a ton of interests and still have a shitty personality, you can also be a great person without many interesting things to talk about. Ideally, you have a bit of both. But they're definitely not the same.
Exactly... your personality is not what you like to do. I liked the style of the video but the guy is spouting nonsense
agree, but its much easier meeting people halfway than saying "ackchyually everyone has a personality, what you want is to be interesting" because to be good at this thing called at the internet you have to observe how a word is used instead of what it means
Ur prob not gonna like to hear this but you're not gonna be that interesting by reciting some shit you saw on national geographic. You only become really interesting when you've lived life on the edge and taken crazy risks and dedicated yourself to something thats bigger than yourself. And it takes years to get to that point so honestly a short term solution for becoming interesting imo is just "looksmaxxing". And ur prob not gonna like to hear that but the reality is that if your in good shape and attractive, its very easy to "be interesting" assuming you have a shred of confidence and conviction when you speak.
@@dorikin333I feel like you didn’t understand what he was saying in the video entirely. It’s not just having a niche interest or random facts, it’s about having the interest and being able to present it in a way that others can relate to or follow. Being a risk taker can give you those topics to talk about but that isn’t the only way.
Thanks for sharing. I needed this
0:53 "bring a copy of mario kart double dash" this is an excellent strategy, for mario kart double dash is an impeccable game that will lead to a great time to be had by everyone involved
Hobbies suggested under important disclaimer at 4:43 :
1. Butterfly Sketching
2. Toy Sailboat Racing
3. Leaf Whittling
4. Moon Phase Tracking
5. Snow Globe Collecting
6. Dream Journaling
7. Bonsai Shaping
8. Teacup Balancing
9. Kite Photography
10. Marble Sorting
11. Quill Writing
12. Cloud Cataloging
13. Shell Carving
14. Star Charting
15. Herb Drying
16. Puddle Mapping
17. Ribbon Braiding
18. Feather Hunting
19. Shadow Puppetry
20. Echo Locating
21. Microscopic Art Creation
22. Aeromodeling Hyper-Realism
23. Vintage Calculator Restoration
24. Extreme Ironing
25. Artisanal Pencil Sharpening
26. Ephemeral Nature Sculpting
27. Competitive Duck Herding
28. Historical Reenactment in Miniature
29. DIY Micro-Climatology
30. Antique Apothecary Bottle Collecting
31. Amateur Cryptozoology
32. Artistic Toast Burning
33. Vintage Typewriter Restoration and Collecting
34. High-Fidelity Nature Sound Recording
35. Ghost Town Exploration
36. Niche Perfumery
37. Collecting and Studying Rare Maps
38. Sand Grain Microphotography
39. Culinary Molecular Gastronomy
40. Esoteric Programming Languages Practicing
someone should make a tier list for them.. haha
S-Tiers for me are definitely Amateur Cryptozoology, Dream journalling, esoteric programming languages practicing and ghost town exploration
Dream journaling?
That's a wonderful topic to start a conversation about lucid dreaming!
+Playing Minecraft
I love the one about Rare maps and Duck Herding
Competitive duck herding sounds fire tbh
Actually thought I was losing it when the subscribe button flashed at 4:00 at the same you were talking about how good that button looks
I think that's a new TH-cam feature, whenever the narrator says 'subscribe' or 'like the video' the respective button glows with colors.
I WAS JUST NOTICING THAT
After u gave the cleaning example I realized I am STACKED with personality bc I LOVE researching productive things and trying them. Like nutrition, parenting tips, non toxic, healthiest life, decor, budgeting, farming, gardening. Like I have a new favorite thing every week but it’s always those things
bro wtf this channel just came out of nowhere & dropped the best video of 2024, thx man fr
did u apply the info in the video
@@drained_yayo the information is useful, applied a couple times and it works like a charm
0:42 "That's just extrovert propaganda..."
As an extrovert, I cannot help but think you are right. 😅
You can't start a conversation by saying: "I'm just myself."
Talented extroverts are the unconsciously competent who've even forgotten the skills they're competent at, which is why they're sometimes bad sources of social advice.
(Not an attack on you, just to be clear!)
@@ProfDCoy true
But what you can say is "Hey...I'm really bad at people...can I get some help?"
Edit: To clarify, you are being truthful (being yourself) and you have done the thing you struggle to do....start a conversation.
@@crysiscontained4421 Eh, not the best approach, honestly.
Starting a conversation while asking for help could put a lot of psychological burden on somebody else. Especially if you are meeting someone for the first time.
Honestly that part is funny because what he said after is basically a guide to "be yourself"
This video feels like a random thought you would have which could be useful to other people but actualized into a real well made video
dude just uploaded his first video and here i thought it was a well known channel, the quality is insane
epic comment
@@easyactually epic channel
I came upon the last video just by chance and watched everything else. It’s a solid channel that can grab your attention from the start and hold onto it from beginning to end. If the quality is-at bare minimum-maintained or manages to increase, then steady channel growth is more than expected. That was kind of long-winded but what I really mean to say is Keep up the good work, you’re doing great.
Lmao fr
nah the quality is technically bad but man its insanely good
cleaning was a really good example to start conversations with as an interest. Because as for me, it would be writing which.. can be identified as “boring.”
It really made me think if people asked there’s actually a lot of interesting things I can talk about.
I’m an introvert so this was really easy to digest, thanks a lot
Introverts aren't real. If you want friends you are just a failed extrovert
Writing is super interesting, provided you're actually writing something, but I think it gets a boring image because a hell of a lot of writers actually don't write much at all, they're too busy rewriting things they've already written because they're perfectionists.
its been 9 months, this advice has worked perfectly
thank you, this is pretty easy, actually
great, this is how self-improvement videos should look like on youtube. Short and straight to the point so after watching the video you can actually try the advice.
Watching this video, I was thinking that this was all pretty obvious, I was also thinking about the irony that autistic people’s habit of ‘infodumping’ is considered by some to be sourced from their social awkwardness but it’s actually an interesting and effective way to start a conversation (which I already knew but it’s nice to hear someone confirm it).
Then I realized that while it’s easy to start conversations about my interests, it often takes a weird amount of extra effort to get the person I’m talking to to talk about their own interests in any level of detail, I ask them what they’re hobbies are and they.. say maybe one thing they like and.. don’t really elaborate unless I ask them to and even then it’s usually about a sentence long without much to respond to. As a result most of my conversations when meeting someone new are about me and while I do like talking about myself and things that I like I would also appreciate if the other person considered that when I ask questions about them it’s because I’m trying to prompt them so that I can get to know them and not.. I don’t know why else they think I would be asking them.
Me: So.. have you read any good books lately?
Them: No, I don’t really read all that often.
Silence.
Me: Any particular TV Shows you like?
Them: I’m not really into TV Shows.
Silence.
Me: So, have you heard about Wings of Fire? It’s this book series about dragons- * continues talking about this until one of us has to leave *
I mean even if someone in a conversation asks me a question I don’t have an interesting answer to like ‘I don’t really watch stuff like that’ or something I at least take their question as a sign that they’re interested in listening to me and change the topic to something I have more to say about. Like, let’s reimagine that scenario except I’m the one being asked questions.
Me: So.. have you read any good books lately?
Me (as Them): No, I don’t really read all that often. I spend a lot of my free time with my pets, I have two dogs and one cat.
Me: Oh, really? What are their names?
Me (as Them): * proceeds to talk about my (as their) pets *
I feel the same, it’s a struggle.
You literally described my biggest issue with conversations, and the examples are sooo on point. I don't wanna be talking about myself the entire time so if I ask you a question can you please elaborate ㅠㅠ I don't wanna be interviewing you, we wanna be having a conversation, back and forth *sigh*
While I’m not neurodivergent, how you described the conversations felt so relatable to me.
i want to talk about my interests but theyre like,, super sus? like some of the communities im in are known for having pedos and weirdos,, and i have a book series im really into but the worldbuilding is so complex idek how to get into it it's so awkward like good lord you have to learn alternative science and world history from the wiki to even begin to explain that trashfire😭
the only thing that's been surprisingly effective in the context of this vid is nerding out over maths and geography like you would not believe how many people are interested in how medecin won a olympic medal in architecture for monaco and it's the only one they have but it isnt even official bc the ioc doesnt recognize art competition medals anymore but i want to talk about the other stuff too yk??? but like my personality cannot be 'i like the niue flag and i think the base e counting system is funny' so i just end up just saying 'uhhh i used to read but i dont now wbu' when people ask about my hobbies bc i dont want to be weird about it,,
this vid gives me confidence to start talking about it though literally shifted my perspective on things like i hate hate hate small talk and self introductions (such as things like 'oh do you like such and such generic activity? what shows do you watch?' its so tedious i have no interest in talking about things we're both disinterested in) and 'getting to know new people' but if i can avoid all that by telling them about weird shit i like and listening to the weird shit they like then that's great
I think it’s because, in my opinion, they don’t need to be that long. When I hear you, I don’t care about your life story. It feels forced when you push it on to someone new.
Great video! I have been obsessed with flowers since I was a little girl... it's been my personality for decades now! I'm a member of all the local tulip, gardenia, rose and orchid clubs!
Damn, that's beautiful
Thats dedication
**starts conversation about flowers**
I actually do have a flower question, i know i can look online but the information is not all the same. My GF gets me some beautiful roses on special occasions however i cannot for the life of me take care of the properly. It upsets me because i want to take care of them to show my gratitude and appreciation for the gift. What would you suggest be a good routine to care for roses so the have a healthy life. @chelseaf.3352
That's something I'm also very interested in! ^^ When it comes to flowers, I specifically know the symbolism and cultural meaning behind some of them :D ( May be a little different in terms of your knowledge on flowers, I assume you likely meant how to take care of them and maybe possibly where they originated from? Which is still awesome as well :^ )
Idk as much about that, but I do know where Higanbana (that's the Japanese word for Red Spider Lily, I'm learning Japanese sooo) originated from (As far as I'm aware they originated from China and were imported to Japan, there is also a festival held in Hidaka (A city in Japan) called 'The Kinchakuda Red Spider Lily Festival' as well, and the ones that grow there were apparently found growing naturally. It's thought that the seeds had somehow traveled upstream and then grew scattered around that area - I have no idea how nature does that- Because the conditions were good enough for the flowers to grow, they started blooming every autumn like they naturally would, but it's a lot of coincidences that need to happen in order for a plant to grow in an area it wasn't previously found naturally blooming in.) I could honestly talk about this flower for a while...
(Sorry for the rant, Ig my comment can sorta work as showing a way you can talk about a topic. Like instead of just asking you about elaborating on what you mean, I specified to what type of knowledge you have in flowers (Like the assumption I made that it may be how to take care of them, etc.) And if it's a different sort of knowledge on them that's ok too :>
If we were having an in person conversation right now maybe you would've elaborated and talked about what you know or have learned about flowers, then I could have asked if you'd like to know more about what I know about them. :)
Any hobbies or knowledge you have linked to places/cultures also seems to interest people a lot, the amount of people I've met interested in Cultural Anthropology (The study of how culture affects people and their lives) and not being aware of it that I've met irl is hilarious! /neu This also then allows me to talk about what Cultural Anthropology is, and a specific anthropological study I find really interesting - to vaguely explain that, it's about this place in extreme conditions which caused people in a community to not feel or experience anger. But that's a little off topic from your comment, so I'll leave that rant there x)
(Still kept this part of my comment as I think it's relevant to the video to some extent)
This has made me realise I actually do have a decent amount of topics I can talk about :'D Still have no idea how to link my other interests to the boardgame 'Blood On The Clocktower' though T~T ( I think being able to link your different interests, like a transition phase in the conversation to another topic you have a lot of knowledge on, can help keeping a conversation going.)
3:46 Goated reference, I will forever remember you as the guy that referenced my favorite Lauryn Hill song
this makes sense. I've seen many videos of mundane topic and never even once said that it was boring looking at it, instead always admired the guys for their skills and genius in videos.
Bigges tthing that somebody pointed out is personality isn't really defined by your interests, but rather I'd say it influences what you're interests are, what you're good at and just how you come off to people, so to your point, if someone is really dedicated to a few particular things that will come off in conversation with them, and in some of your examples its the first thing people see. But usually the first thing people see is what you look, sound like, what you display liking, and to me the most important part of ur personality is just the way you interact with people. It's definitely boosted by having confidence in something u do but yeah, somewhat different but also great video. My biggest problem is picking one thing unless it's school rn lol 💀.
I genuinely thought you were an already established TH-camr because your titles and whole video concepts seem so appealing, this is gonna blow up for sure.
Nice work dude keep it up!!
Fumo
@@poga23 indeed
Just wanted to let you know that this was a great video and that I really liked the style and humour.(Not to make you feel trapped in a video style already) You just got a new subscriber 😊
Glad you like the style :) new video in the same style pretty soon
all the clever intertwined jokes oh my god… “good pause game” + “..well there’s no chairs either” + even the subscribe joke lmfao you are so Clever you are 100% going places
watching this was fun! i've had an underlying lack of self image for a while since i graduated high school around the end of lockdowns in my area. Feeling left behind and not as capable as other ppl in their early 20s and wondering if i should try changing how i act to feel a sense of fitting in easier.
Got diagnosed autistic and I have been learning to remind myself that i quite literally am neurologically different from my peers and even if i wasnt, everyone matures and junk at different rates.
Seriously this is a nice and wholesome reminder that you're just you and other people DO see you.
I'm an extrovert, I didn't really need this video, but it was very interesting and pleasant to watch. I'm subscribing, actually
OMG do you know the social wizard tactics
@@easyactually with great powers, come great responsibilities. I swore to use social wizard tactics only to help people
Please give me some of your powers
1:37 was really impactful for me. Some of my favorite people to work with aren't particularly interesting, but they do have a strong characteristic that makes them more fun to talk to than others. I've followed advice similar to yours recently and instead of hiding all of my "boring" hobbies, I've just embraced letting the world know about my borderline-autistic, niche world. I think it makes me weirder than most people but paradoxically I get way more smiles and friendly engagement from others. All without switching teams to extroversion. Nice video my dude.
Which hobbies are they?
hell yeah! spread your borderline-autistic, niche world around the world!! lets hear it!!!
I know this is your very first video that was posted literally one day ago, but before I saw your subscriber/view count, I thought I was watching a 100+ thousand view video of some popular youtuber. Really good, insightful, well made video. Subscribed.
Thanks so much, the comment means a lot!
This channel is absolutely everything, omg. It's informative, well written + presented, and it's super entertaining. Bravo and thank you for the tips!
This was actually so helpful lmao. Underrated channel. Should definitely be so much more popular.
This video has no business being this amazing and especially relatable, subscribed 😊
just be yourself meaning your personality is how you see and experience the world, how you react to things, what you like and dislike, how you interact with other people, what excited you, etc
this really just dissolves down to, learn about something till you know a little bit more than everyone else, and explain it to people in a way THEY can digest it
without talking down ***
@@syra1541 yes
Just wanted to say I never subscribed to a channel so fast. Great narration, very insightful while also being funny. Great job!
This is my favorite video of this channel which made me follow . It is unique and not like all other videos about personality.
One of those rare times i wish i could invest in a youtube channel like it was a stock. You're gonna get huge man! Love the vid.
Man this video was actually really helpful and even made me realize I already have a decent personality I just need to hone it in, your channel's going to blow up bro
WOW, dude I love your videos. You're so creative. So many things I could comment on. Like for example at 3:33 juxtaposing the dial tone with the social proof?? Amazing idea. Holy crap. Great job!! No wonder you're blowing up.
This is the first video that inspired me to leave a comment like this. I started learning English on TH-cam, and this video feels like a gift. It gives me time to ponder what interests me and now I know the key parts that I should cultivate! Thanks a lot ❤
As I can see, you´ve got a great idea for a YT channel and a very good way of doing it. You´ve got a plan, and I respect that. I am looking forward to your next vids.
Today I learnt: I am not boring, I just don't have any social skills.
The information is the cleanest as possible, straight to the point, thx:))
Cleaning is actually very interesting and very necessary. Everyone has to do it to some degree, it's very relatable & useful.
I actually avoid talking about some of my interests 😅 so I guess I'm choosing to have less personality.
But I have too many interests so it works out.
Bro your content is the content that actually helps! Don't every stop making...now you are that lovable channel of mine who almost nobody knows about. And it's cool to have one like that.
I love your humour and the really dry delivery absolutely kills me.
The one part that seems sus is "it can literally be anything". I think less common and/or more specific interests get more personality points.
I love video games, but if I meet a total stranger and the first thing they say is "I like video games", then internally I'm like "pfft, what a nerd".
Minecraft is more specific. Better.
Cleaning is uncommon. Even better. The topic may be less interesting, but that person is more interesting.
I love your videos so far! (I just found your channel.)
You shine a refreshing take on topics that other people just beat to death, lol
3:55 The detail of the subscribe button having rainbow colors on it while talking is a clever way of breaking fourth wall
Oh my god, i never knew that was actually a thing 😂
i fell for it too i just felt the uncontrollable urge to follow the rainbow 😔🏳️🌈
I think the funniest nod is that it also happens to be while he's talking to a rainbow line of cyborgs from UMK3
0:05 Hellen Keller be like: “what the hell did I ever do to you man?”
Hellen Keller wouldn’t even care could she couldn’t hear him say it
bro i love your videos so much, this is what i call quality content
i like how the tips you give are different yet simpler than the majority of people that do this type of content
More than 100k subscribers in a month is insane. Congratulations.
didnt know a random video at 3:30am could be this enticing
-your 110th subscriber
Doesn't it just come back to having the social skills to make your interests sound interesting? Nobody ever seems to care about what I am interested in.
Then they're probably not the kind of people you want to be friends with.
@@DoctorViper My brain for some reason swapped the “they” and “you” so ur message came off really mean at first 😅
this was an awesome vid! this kind of made my evening seeing something so light and also pretty interesting. I really needed this reminder, sometimes we overcomplicate things and honestly everyone needs some simplicity in everyday life
Woke up and decided to spit straight facts, also I like this persons voice subscribed
My biggest problem with this is: what do I do when interacting with people in the same niche? If I come up to my mom's elementary school teacher friends, draw a detailed world map and name every capital in Europe, they'll be very impressed. But if I tell my uni classmates in International Relations "hey, did you know Bolivia used to have a coastline, but lost it during a war against Chile?" they'll be like "yeah I knew that" and it's no longer my stand out trait because everyone else around me is also savvy in the same things ._.
"It took me 4 years to draw like the masters of the Renaissance but a lifetime to learn how to draw like a child again." -Pablo Picasso
That applies to more than just art.
@ULTRAOutdoorsman r/ whoosh
Hey I had to do a project on Pablo so I probably know more about him than the average person does
Tbf probably not a good idea to take life advice from history's second most overrated artist.
@@yurisei6732 It ain't even that deep man. A good advice is good advice regardless from who it comes from. I don't even know s*** about Pablo but I know that's a good piece from experience.
I'll be honest I didn't realize people had such strong feelings on Pablo Picasso.
I like dancing, but almost every time I try to talk about that, everyone is just like "Well, I can't dance", and then immediately stop the conversation.
Tell them why you like it or how you started learning and who you look up to... I think some people like to feel included, so if you find a way to include them even though they don't share our preferred topic, they'll open up and appreciate it.
I love this perspective! It's so true that getting a personality doesn't have to be complicated. When I embraced my quirky interest in collecting vintage board games, it opened up so many fun conversations.
Navigating social situations can be tough, especially when humor is involved-like when my game nights lead to accidental laughter over ridiculous game rules. I recently joined the Sense of Humor Improvement Program by Habit10x, which taught me how to weave humor into my interests, making interactions more engaging.
So, find that unique passion and share it confidently; you'll be surprised at how interesting it makes you!
This is an excellent video, thanks for defining & explaining so many things with clarity. ❤
Ngl when I was recommended this vid by the algorithm I assumed that you had like at least 3 mill subs
Your style is great and your format is amazing, your channel will blow up I’m sure
Tips for people, because I have a personality: you don't even have to be that good at your "spike" to be noticeable. I am shit at birding (couple days ago I called a kestrel a sharp shinned I am so cooked), but I know that I am better at it than 99% of the population, so birder is one of my personality traits. You don't have to be good at something, you just have to be super invested in it and have lots of random knowledge. I think it also helps to do something unique, some people be like "my hobby is driving while listening to music" I don't care if you are the best driver in the world, that is really boring. Or, if your "spike" is really boring, make it sound interesting! You like drawing, ok so do a lot of people, but what especially do you draw? What is your style? What are your drawing hot takes? Make it about you. Also, this is kind of adressed in the video, but don't be afraid to be weird, I am weird (Im a weirdo, I don't... fit in *scoffs*) (for real tho no sane person has five pebbles as their pfp, I'm sorry its true), I have weird hobbies and interests, but this is what gives me a personality. Sometimes people are scared away by this (cowards), but this just helps me weed out who I don't vibe with.
Pro tip for anyone who's a half decent story-teller: Try to very casually drop information that will invite questions during a conversation and when the questions come, share a particularly wacky and memorable story about yourself.
For example, I might mention "Ferdinand" and when people ask who he is, I can say "Oh, he's a dead subway rat I extracted the skull from" and then go into a fuller version of the story (which is pretty entertaining imo). This way people remember me as the dead rat girl :)
I really find this video so good and informative. I subscribed and saved this video for another watch, gotta take notes cuz I am so introvert that when I talk to a colleague after not seeing them for a long time I start to mumble and say the weirdest things.
Great video! My takeaway from it is: showing people how _you interact with your interests_ gives you personality. Cleaning? is an interest. 'remembering' cleaning techniques, 'seeking' cleaning opportunities: that's a personality. It's like the difference between drink mixing (interest) and bartendering (personality). Even a robot can mix drinks (hell, they can serve up cocktails even.) But getting into bartendering means you're a real, breathing person. It means you find being a bartender fun, spend time from your limited lifespan looking up bartendering, and welcome the idea of making people drinks.
me during the entire video: OHHH THAT MAKE SENSE! I do not have anything I am really good with. I love to do so much things , end up do not know my real passion or hobby. That's why I have problem in explaining my hobby etc. I think im gonna try this method. Thank youu!
How do I make "Staring at a wall" sound like an interesting hobby
you can think a better way to say it like... "I like to observe the composition of buildings"
@@dhans2881 lmao like, "I derive profound satisfaction in engaging in contemplative reverie, fixating my gaze upon the silent narratives embedded within the artistic nature of walls during moments of leisure."
So that spike is a WEDGE.
(Like, to stick into something to help open it.)
Omg you just made me realize all the time I spent looking for a picture of a spike to use just get weird sharp objects that weren't what I wanted, I literally could have just searched for a pointy cone
Dude you're killing it, surprised to see you have less than a dozen videos. I donated a sub
3:26 this shit was so good i showed that to my mom and we both laughed. keep it up man
Hmm. I needed to hear this! But it's so hard to keep the niche thing that I love understandable. I love diving into the nitty gritty of a topic. Maybe it's good to learn the layman's understanding of said topic too?
My issue is hyperfixating on something and then moving onto another. I can never maintain a hobby or truly be passionate about anything because I hate the idea of being restricted to 1 thing for the sake of having a hobby or being passionate about it so I fall out of love with it and move on.
this makes it seem so simple I actually have some hope for the future for once!
damn, good video. I hyper focus on alot of topics and this made me feel more comfortable expressing that! can't wait to see the next one.
i think your channel is one of the best, actually
personality is also identified by traits like how someone reacts to specific situations whether he his calm, panicked etc sometimes its just your upbringing some people find my way of speaking cool¯\_(ツ)_/¯for no reason
what i want to say is some people have naturally cool personalities despite not having such interests
i guess we are the unlucky ones (T_T)
I agree with this, personality is more than your interests, as someone that went through a "personality crisis" really your personality is just the way you think about things and approach the world. But developing your own interests is still important, it's just also important not to conflate interests with personality. Because when you realize you don't like the thing so much anymore, you might feel like you're losing your personality when it never really was your personality in the first place.
I recommend meditations, such as going on walks or bike rides, turning off the music in your car if you drive, taking off your headphones if you take public transportation, etc. It will give you time to reflect, and that time to reflect is very important for learning who you are. Yes, learning. Many of us need to discover or re-discover our personalities after it's been shoved to the wayside through so much social media doomscrolling.
Damn, Im gonna try that thank you
@@Cobalt985Why don't these comments get more likes? (This is actually good stuff).
@@Cobalt985preach
Great video! I've been struggling with this for a while now.
I am blown away by the video quality, I really couldn't have guessed that this was your first video.
Happy to be your 127th subscriber :)
3:17 - "We could get my pressure washer and clean your driveway this weekend.
- Wow, that sounds pretty cool actually." ( said no one ever )
I came from the trolly problem video. I did not expect to get a confidence boost. I genuinely feel better about myself even though I haven’t checked if this works at all. Thanks.
Everything about this video and ur channel is knowledgeable and fun,with ofcourse the perfect sarcasm and timing
I just found this channel and cannot believe that it's brand new, the quality of the video is amazing!
HOW ARE YOU NOT FAMOUS YET WHEN I TELL YOU MY JAW DROPPED WHEN I SAW UR SUB COUNT 😭 you deserve so many more subs anyways u just got a new subscriber
You are such a gem of a guy whose perception is clearly next to me i think we're just living on different shores of the world. Keep going bruder.
The way you simplified this is genius all introverts and chronically online people can learn from this video
I’ve found that this is a good first step and then slowly learning to present the information with humour you like and other extroverted type traits is a good way to develop
I'm so glad that you mentioned the importance of this on college applications. People think that to get into an Ivy League you need a perfect GPA, test scores, and extracurriculars. The reality is that you not only need that stuff, but you also need to be unique, have some wild specialization in something that makes them say, "Wow, this would be a fascinating person to have on campus."
I work in a field of introverts who all dare eachother to NOT mention what they do for a living within 5mins of meeting someone.
3:47 lmao the lauryn hill joke so well placed
No way you got it :D
@@easyactually il listen to it rn while going to school lol
This is my new top one favorite channel ever.
Loving the content , bro is hella underrated. Comedy on point with being actually useful 🤯