my life changed after I embraced being behind in life

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 8 ม.ค. 2025

ความคิดเห็น • 820

  • @raeahthewriter8082
    @raeahthewriter8082 หลายเดือนก่อน +873

    Time is such a fake social construct. This is why I love visiting places that run on "island time" bcuz whyyyyy are we rushing?!

    • @HannahGrace777
      @HannahGrace777 หลายเดือนก่อน +72

      Why are we rushing? Yep, the inner colonizer wants us to 'Rushmore' ...lol

    • @shaniom913
      @shaniom913 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      A word!

    • @RavenWilliams-f4x
      @RavenWilliams-f4x หลายเดือนก่อน +19

      Same! 💀 I’m always telling folks that time is an illusion when I show up “late”

    • @riquittamoore4874
      @riquittamoore4874 29 วันที่ผ่านมา

      ❤️❤️

    • @healthjay4253
      @healthjay4253 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

      island time? I’ve never heard of that but I’m abt to look it up. Time is so fake I believe. It’s like some of us are rushing but for what, really?

  • @HellsKells666
    @HellsKells666 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +191

    “I will never have their respect, and I’m not willing to pay the price for it either.” Love this.

  • @shaniom913
    @shaniom913 หลายเดือนก่อน +418

    "A wizard is never late nor early. A wizard always arrives exactly when [she] means to."
    ~Gandalf, "Lord of the Rings"

    • @Infinity.0.0.Intelligence
      @Infinity.0.0.Intelligence 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      A wizard is male and in that quote he says he not she.

    • @zarahbelle3627
      @zarahbelle3627 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      OMG, obsessed😍😂 my fave film all time

    • @yanikeonpurpose
      @yanikeonpurpose 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      Come on Gandalf!!! 🧙‍♂️

    • @DrDroog29
      @DrDroog29 20 วันที่ผ่านมา +8

      When Gandalf gives you permission, you take it 🫡.

    • @ambersummer2685
      @ambersummer2685 19 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@Infinity.0.0.IntelligenceNo shit🤡🤣

  • @caleigh2862
    @caleigh2862 21 วันที่ผ่านมา +88

    From having a panic attack to finding this video and having it COMPLETELY calm me down. I really needed this at this moment.

    • @AleciaRenece
      @AleciaRenece  2 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      @@caleigh2862 🫂🫂🫂🫂🫂💛💛💛💛💛🥹

  • @awe_possum
    @awe_possum 24 วันที่ผ่านมา +180

    Falling behind is better than constant irreversible regret. I'm done proving, coping, explain, rushing. Men don't experience the pressures we do. And then we get called neurotic after years of being in the pressure cooker, boiling and steaming. No my girls, let's turn this around for us. 💜

    • @bm5_5_5
      @bm5_5_5 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +9

      This is so so true.

    • @ReUse_Purposed
      @ReUse_Purposed 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

      Honestly, caring about what other men think is a waste of time. I've learned this from personal experience. Focusing on the men who support you in healthy ways is key. There are a lot of awesome men out there who want to respect women.

    • @Aphextal93
      @Aphextal93 12 วันที่ผ่านมา

      No, we definitely do in different ways. Especially if you aren't "manly" enough. Don't dare say "men don't experience" bc as a queer man you are dead ass f***ing wrong. Good day.

  • @elfmingocrab
    @elfmingocrab หลายเดือนก่อน +321

    I'm 19, and I had gifted kid burnout at 16 years old. I'm not in college like other people my age, so I naturally felt stupid and behind. The world has so much to offer me at this age. I want to explore more of it. Even if I must do it with no friends, I want to enjoy my time here.

    • @Hannah-y2z
      @Hannah-y2z หลายเดือนก่อน +49

      Gir,l I'm 23 and went through the same thing at your age, gifted kid burnout and I had just dropped out of uni, and it was during covid as well which made it so hard and lonely. Still figuring things out at a slow pace, but I'm content with moving slow. Is there anyway you can connect with people around you. Working at a Cafe one day a week or a bar, joining a reading group, I know it's not always easy to make friends when modern life is super isolating, finding a community is very healing
      I'm rooting for you :)❤

    • @elfmingocrab
      @elfmingocrab หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      ​@Hannah-y2z, thank you so much :)

    • @sapphiremontrelle8091
      @sapphiremontrelle8091 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +16

      Me too. I felt “behind” because I started college at 19 instead of 18 after a 1 year gap year. It’s okay you are still figuring it out

    • @syddn3y
      @syddn3y 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +8

      Your friends will come sooner than you think. They'll be people on the same journey as you. ❤

    • @boibie3153
      @boibie3153 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

      I’m 19 and out of school too! I have so much that I want to do, but at my own pace yknow.

  • @smurfette6499
    @smurfette6499 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +122

    My whole life I’ve been striving and bracing, always in survival mode.

    • @kimmcdaniel4190
      @kimmcdaniel4190 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      Same😢

    • @Marthaz-jl7tv
      @Marthaz-jl7tv 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Well, it paid off, right? You clearly survived!

  • @nathalieduverna6963
    @nathalieduverna6963 หลายเดือนก่อน +509

    The title alone is comforting🤗. I enjoy being 42(bday 12/13) still figuring it out because i have children I'm teaching as i learn. You never stop learning. Thank you ❤❤❤

    • @Mike_1nce_More
      @Mike_1nce_More หลายเดือนก่อน +22

      I know this is off topic, but... Happy Early Birthday!!!

    • @nathalieduverna6963
      @nathalieduverna6963 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      😁 ​@@Mike_1nce_MoreThank you 😅

    • @Mike_1nce_More
      @Mike_1nce_More หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@nathalieduverna6963 yw sis

    • @yumaikai
      @yumaikai หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      Happy Early birthday fellow Sagittarian! (I'm 12/11). We all got this!

    • @Hairbytyra.s
      @Hairbytyra.s 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      HAPPY BIRTHDAY 🎂🎊🎁 ‼️ (in advance)

  • @bbirishbae
    @bbirishbae 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +63

    “We foster a community where we are unkind” 😢 yes. The truest thing I have ever heard.

  • @marawashington3280
    @marawashington3280 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +80

    This entire video was 10000% truth. As a 44 year old unmarried woman, I've been told that "I need to marry soon or else..." or else what? is my follow up question. I'm at peace with my singleness and I am glad to embrace it wholeheartedly. Women, we do not need to co-sign with societal pressures. Learn to love the person you are, the skin you're in and the love and support you give yourself each and every day!

    • @la6136
      @la6136 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +17

      Codependent miserable married women always want to pressure happy single women I am tired of them

    • @saramatthews7159
      @saramatthews7159 9 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

      I am 40 years old and the eldest of five daughters...and my four sisters are all married so I do get the strange stares because I enjoy being single/childfree and doing my own thing. At this age I don't give a crap anymore lol! Life is about doing what YOU want to do and moving at YOUR own pace.

    • @chenicerogers5928
      @chenicerogers5928 9 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      💚🍃Learn to love the person you are!

  • @Ramanhere468
    @Ramanhere468 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +83

    Im 35 and single. Yet have a great career, house, car, pets, savings. Yet people around me, parents, family, etc. make me feel like a failure because Im not yet married. 😂

    • @marawashington3280
      @marawashington3280 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +9

      Yup. I'm 44 and I get that too. If you are happy with your life the way it is, that is truly all that matters.

    • @yolandaray6862
      @yolandaray6862 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +23

      Healthy, housed, and employed is always a win.

    • @kisha91
      @kisha91 8 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

      Can you imagine!?! It is top tier delusional behavior on their parts!

    • @Ri57490
      @Ri57490 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Being financially dependent on someone is stressful and reduces the lifespan.

  • @Stuffyluffy
    @Stuffyluffy 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +20

    Not to be too depressing, but I've had years of suicidal thoughts because I just can't keep up with the world with my physical disability. I really needed to watch this video

    • @LemuirlHinz
      @LemuirlHinz 11 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      I hear in your message a person who HAS kept up in her own special way with a strength many “abled” persons don’t have. Think how innovative and creative you are everyday. Thank you for sharing. You matter and you are an inspiration.

    • @ReadBooksMore
      @ReadBooksMore วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Your existence is enough.

  • @Pozorrogo
    @Pozorrogo หลายเดือนก่อน +192

    I once told my younger friends, who were in college and struggling. They were afraid they were getting behind and overwhelmed with having to work full-time and also go to school full time and full semesters. And I told them, why are you doing this to yourselves?? You dont have to go to school full-time. You can go part-time and take like 6 credits per semester. You don't HAVE to stick to the 2 or 4 year plan. Yes you may graduate 'later' than you would have normally. But you will still have your sanity at the end of it all.
    Its almost like a lightbulb switched in their heads at that moment. They instantly started going on their phones and trying to drop classes they were signing up for the next semester and coming up with a different plan. Its like they never thought to themselves that they didnt HAVE to stick to the 4 year plans. That they could go at their own pace. Its almost like they thought it would look bad if they took longer to graduate.
    I let them know that NOT A SINGLE PLACE that hires them will look into their cirriculums. None of them will even ask if it took 4 or 10 years to graduate. All they care about is that paper and IF you graduated at all.
    Theyve both since graduated, albeit later than they normally would have. And Im sure if I asked them if they regret taking longer they would say no. I didnt get my associates until I was 36. Everyones pace is their own and every life is unique. I would consider myself a late bloomer

    • @michelleramsey4302
      @michelleramsey4302 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +28

      I did ONE class at a time...best decision ever...and guess what YEARS later got my masters and my sanity ..no one asked me why it took so long...all they wanted was a certified copy of my degree.

    • @Pozorrogo
      @Pozorrogo 28 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@michelleramsey4302 Even with my 2 year community college associates I took almost 3.5 years to complete for me. I struggled in algebra a lot and so I took those classes during the summertime so I could solely focus on that one single class that I struggled with. And it was still very hard! But I cant imagine having to do those classes along with several others at the same time. And youre right Ive never heard of anyone even being looked down upon because they 'took longer' to complete college than the 2 or 4 year plans.

    • @DanielleEdwards-qx5dm
      @DanielleEdwards-qx5dm 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

      Such good advice ❤

    • @goeienacht
      @goeienacht 26 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Everyone, listen to “Snooze” by Agust D 🥹

    • @Cvuntykind
      @Cvuntykind 17 วันที่ผ่านมา +7

      Wish I had someone like you in my life when I first started college

  • @ying_Ram0824
    @ying_Ram0824 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +68

    That father wound and rejection will have us chasing enoughness! I’m finally over it at 54.

  • @f.taigne3610
    @f.taigne3610 หลายเดือนก่อน +253

    I was having my daughter and I remember the doctor telling me that my baby was behind schedule (born late) and I had to correct him. I said "Whatever time she arrives will be her B(earth) day... so she"s right on time". Imagine the absurdity of trying to schedule something as divine as childbirth. You also made a brilliant observation about society conditioning us to take the same path in life so we are forced to compete. As someone who was chastised for not living my life conventionally, I appreciated this point of view. Doing things differently and at your own pace... also brings the peace of being in your own lane. TY!

    • @Maderlololohio
      @Maderlololohio 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +21

      Well it does exist for safety reasons. Knowing the due date is crucial. The child has to come out or be induced within two weeks after that date or the situation can be lethal for the baby. So we have to know the due date.

    • @Sanecrist
      @Sanecrist 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +11

      @@MaderlololohioNo, we don’t. That’s just what you were conditioned to believe. Naegele’s Rule assumes every women’s cycle is 28 days, which we all know is false.
      There are plenty of factors that affect gestation length. Most notably, the mother’s age. But I’d like to point out the father’s age is a factor too.
      The baby sends signals that causes the mother to have contractions when the lungs are fully developed. If there were complications before that, it wasn’t something as trivial as the length of gestation, there were other problems. Lots of countries don’t induce for the sole reason of gestation and they have better birth mortality than the US.

    • @f.taigne3610
      @f.taigne3610 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      @@Maderlololohio This is why a lot of women choose at-home births...the medical system is invasive and doesn't respect the natural ability of the human body. Due dates are not always accurate & are educated guesses at best. As a result, a lot of women are pushed into unnecessary c-sections.

    • @yanikeonpurpose
      @yanikeonpurpose 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +9

      @@MaderlololohioI wonder how we ascertained this “due date” before we even knew what dates, times, pens and papers were!? … yet here we are, billions of years old 🤔

    • @AuDHDVee
      @AuDHDVee 24 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

      ​@@Maderlololohio I was born over a month late and my mom was not induced. She was in labor with me for 4 days, Monday morning to Thursday night. This isn't true.

  • @onthelo
    @onthelo หลายเดือนก่อน +95

    People give me such grief for eating slowly. It's literally one of the few things I can savor. When the food good, I want to eat slow. There are so many meals I may not be able to re-eat - I wanna savor the moment and flavors and history. Not to mention, eating slowly helps my digestion and avoid overeating. This is a small example of how capitalism is eroding people from the inside out.

    • @YouAreDreamingRightNow
      @YouAreDreamingRightNow 24 วันที่ผ่านมา +11

      v smart. food/smell/taste is attached to our memories so by slowing down and savoring, you'll have more fond memories to look back on.

    • @DeePeeZee
      @DeePeeZee 21 วันที่ผ่านมา

      I love this for you.
      I eat so fast and I want to eat slower, but I just struggle so hard with that. It's how I've eaten my whole life.
      But I'm happy someone else can have an easier time with something I have a hard time. I don't want other people to struggle the same way I do. Shit sucks.

    • @Bookmarkedin15orless
      @Bookmarkedin15orless 17 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

      I do this too! Enjoy your food and pay them no mind. Sometimes, people might project their own insecurities, fears, or unfulfilled desires onto others. When they see someone doing something they secretly admire or wish they could do, it can trigger feelings of inadequacy, which they may mask with criticism. Eating slowly really is a form of self-care and gratitude, not just for the food but for the moment itself.

    • @zr2jake
      @zr2jake 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      Well said! Eating should never be rushed!

  • @LetsTalkAboutItWithMara
    @LetsTalkAboutItWithMara หลายเดือนก่อน +138

    I still struggle with this feeling like I’m not doing enough, thank you for the reminder ❤

  • @valm.5243
    @valm.5243 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +26

    This is so timely and comforting. I'm 47, almost 48 in Feb. My marriage is failing. No kids. My career isn't where I want it to be and whole bunch of other challenges. I've been in a valley battling anxiety and depression, clinging to my faith in God. This is a good reminder that I am on my own path and timeline. I'm on a scenic, winding road not the freeway. What a wonderful analogy & message. Thank-you!

    • @YWiggy5
      @YWiggy5 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      I’m sending you love ❤❤

    • @valm.5243
      @valm.5243 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

      @@YWiggy5 Awww...you're sweet! That means a lot. God bless you for that. 🙏 🥰

    • @zr2jake
      @zr2jake 14 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Sending you prayers!

    • @valm.5243
      @valm.5243 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      @ Thank-you...God bless!

  • @ashcash5035
    @ashcash5035 หลายเดือนก่อน +130

    Time is fake, money is fake, race is not real. My inner colonizer and wage slave mentality and people pleasing keeps me oppressed. Thank you for the conversation. I’m 39 and a childless cat lady. I always wanted a family and to travel, but I’ve never achieved either.

    • @emmasarge4057
      @emmasarge4057 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +7

      Don't you dare count yourself out. A wonderful person to watch is Casey Dressler Comedy which is her TH-cam channel. I will assure you that you will relate to her. She's fabulous and so are you.

    • @halloweendancing
      @halloweendancing 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +9

      I hope you get to travel!! You can do it for cheap depending on where you go - it can be scary to take the leap but it’s awesome. ♥️♥️

    • @WetPaintChi
      @WetPaintChi 24 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

      you never know what could happen any day of the week!

    • @HometvchannelHome
      @HometvchannelHome 24 วันที่ผ่านมา +10

      I had my first child at 30, second at 35, my last at 40. And most people travel well into their 70s. You have plenty of time. ❤

    • @tie777
      @tie777 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

      start by walking around your neihborhood or sit by a stream of water, little habits make big outcomes for your next
      F.irst
      L.ove
      Y.ourself ❤

  • @coconutbythesea
    @coconutbythesea 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +10

    I feel the same way. At one point in my early 30s I came to think and see, even if the "timeline" is the correct measure, I have been way too far behind. I thought what's the point trying to catch up, might as well just enjoy the scenery of what I'm going through. And then at 34 I got cancer and after that the "timeline" made no sense at all. What if I only have a few years to live? Being in that position reinforced even more that there's no point of trying to catch up.
    Now I'm living a much slower life. Not making as much money as I used to. But I really enjoy it and I'm happy enough to know even if cancer kills me soon, I'll be dead living life that I enjoy by my own measure.

  • @josepha133
    @josepha133 7 วันที่ผ่านมา +12

    This might just be the most important video I've ever clicked on. I got sick when I was 12 years old and spent the following 14 years mostly bedridden or in hospital, "advancing" at a much slower pace in life as a consequence. I'm finally doing better health wise, but I've been beating myself up over "being behind" all this time. Thank you for helping me shift my perspective.

  • @nixtrix84
    @nixtrix84 หลายเดือนก่อน +78

    "There is no roadmap" "you gotta go alone". So timely with this message. A definite confirmation of something I knew and was grieving the reality of.

    • @nixtrix84
      @nixtrix84 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Had to come back and comment again. The way my whole body has just relaxed simply because NO ONE in my personal life understand these principles and it makes me feel so heavy.

  • @rheeryder2524
    @rheeryder2524 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +42

    Rush hour is more dangerous than many know. Years ago I was writing a book about the sheer terror of the rat race & while researching wild statistics I discovered this:
    Experts stated that up to maybe THREE hours AFTER someone gets home from being in rush hour traffic they are extremely suseptible of having a major heart attack.
    THREE HOURS LATER.
    Sobering.
    DMV in the house. TH-cam recommended you 2 me this early morning out of nowhere. 🎉

    • @foodievids5814
      @foodievids5814 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

      I used to drive 2 hrs to work and 2 hours back 😬

  • @Princesscocos
    @Princesscocos 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +24

    Returning to school at 29 no kids or a man. When I look at my life I’m just now discovering who I actually am and dropping bad habits. All the decisions I’ve made up until now have been rushed so I could keep up with this imaginary life I wanted and none if it has worked out. Luckily I have a clean slate to do it right this time and do it for me.

  • @thepeculiarmaple
    @thepeculiarmaple 6 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

    38:40 Im crying and tearing up.
    Your video has changed my mindset forever on this topic.
    I can't say that I ever thought of this idea in this way. The idea that physical limitations and disability even (my personal struggle at the moment) are only shameful cause of other people like, irs not new to me? But hearing it worded this way removed the idea completely.
    My inability to do specific things is not a fault. Because how is it I ever did anything wrong by being born into a body that probably never could?
    Itd be like telling a fish to fly.
    I cant drive, and I can now see how I don't have to feel any particular way about it. My life has some predetermined stuff, and yk. i should write that all down to get it out off my way

  • @thevenusianvault
    @thevenusianvault 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +25

    I needed this. I feel like I’ve made so much progress internally, but materially I feel behind. When I was most successful materially, I was burnout and detached from myself. It’s so hard to find a balance, but I’m ready to live my own life.

  • @NamasteInYourLane
    @NamasteInYourLane 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +43

    I totally agree. Stressing over the thought and feeling of being behind in life has gotten me nothing more but stress. It's not motivating. It makes you feel defeated.

  • @HometvchannelHome
    @HometvchannelHome 24 วันที่ผ่านมา +24

    This makes me feel better about leaving Corp America. Having kids in my 30s when I was ready. And enjoying their childhood. I didn't earn the big money. Yes, I have struggled, but we have had a safe, nice life. This was very very helpful.
    I love that statement. We are living in a world made up by delusional people.

  • @UdochiOkeke
    @UdochiOkeke 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +34

    Late bloomer song brought tears to my eyes. I come from a "high achieving" family, but I have chosen to take the scenic route. So, this really spoke to me...

  • @ErinJenkins-u2oooo
    @ErinJenkins-u2oooo 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +38

    This is so true! I love this topic. I was sitting in a pizza shop the other day, and the manager was so kind, and we were having a chat about the secret ranch sauce! He was like I've worked here for 12 years, and people love this ranch." I was in my head like...he has been making pizza and living life for 12 years, what universe was I living in thinking I had to go and go and compete and climb, when this guy has been making pizza and having great conversations. I also had to tell a co-worker who I used to work with at a small college that it was okay to slow down in the work that we do now because not everyone lives by productivity and she was like what. I said you'll see, and she has been taking her time every since, but it was a real culture shock for us both...

    • @rheeryder2524
      @rheeryder2524 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      I absolutely LOVE your comment. 🎉🎉🎉

  • @arispalate
    @arispalate 19 วันที่ผ่านมา +25

    I am proud to have seen this today. I just turned 30 (today) and I really realized that life is just beginning. Thank you for sharing this message 💕

    • @AleciaRenece
      @AleciaRenece  19 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      @@arispalate Happy Birthday, Beautiful. 💛🌺🫂🥹 May this year and the rest of your life be absolutely wonderful. 🫂🫂🫂

    • @YWiggy5
      @YWiggy5 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      Happy belated birthday! 🥳❤️

    • @arispalate
      @arispalate 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      @ thank you!!

  • @EdenAdele
    @EdenAdele หลายเดือนก่อน +116

    'Inner colonizer' . . . that hit different! I'm gonna have to keep that one. 💔
    'Late Bloomer' is a song to the souls of many! #ThankYou 💜💜💜

    • @ying_Ram0824
      @ying_Ram0824 29 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Yes it did.

  • @arniecestevenson4643
    @arniecestevenson4643 24 วันที่ผ่านมา +35

    As a black woman I constantly feel in competition with time. “The journey is the destination”. I appreciate you. Thanks for making your content. ❤

    • @saf1999
      @saf1999 21 วันที่ผ่านมา

      ⁠@@vivdoolan6846because she’s speaking for herself lmao

  • @ThrivingNotDying
    @ThrivingNotDying หลายเดือนก่อน +47

    So timely! I'm my own worst critic. I need to have more grace with myself because at my BIG AGE I thought I would have it "all together." And I don't. Still learning how to accept where I am in life.

  • @TheKirinyaga
    @TheKirinyaga 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +40

    7:03 maaaaan. And this is why I want to live somewhere where I don't have to have a car. It is very stressful just trying to not die and to get where you're going.

    • @Weeniehutnurse
      @Weeniehutnurse 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +7

      I live in NYC, yeah it’s loud and what not. However, it’s so nice in Brooklyn, especially southern Brooklyn. I can walk anywhere and everywhere, but not have to deal with the loudness of Manhattan. It’s also somewhat cheaper than other areas

  • @itsallgoodb
    @itsallgoodb 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +14

    “We are living in someone else’s imagination.” 💯😮‍💨 Whoa, that hit me square between the eyes

  • @chromesniper00
    @chromesniper00 7 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

    This video feels like the perfect hug I needed for the start of 2025 and I feel like it's the same for others. You said it so eloquently.

  • @theyjustwantyourmoney4539
    @theyjustwantyourmoney4539 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +28

    I also thought I was behind on everything in life and I was seeing no point of living, thanks for your encouragement

  • @aladynamedSusan
    @aladynamedSusan 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +13

    I've been dying inside from a disease called "falling behind" My soul needed this message more than my mind understood I never needed to search for it. This video just literally came into my feed. Thank you, Sun daughter ❤️

  • @CamJames
    @CamJames หลายเดือนก่อน +32

    Excellent video as always, loving the custom captions. This applies to so many situations in life. It applies to this job on TH-cam, it applies to a 9-5, to relationships, everything. I've learned to slow down at this point in life as well. Some things aren't worth the strain.
    I got a plaque from TH-cam for 100k, and my primary thought leading up to it was, "nothing is gonna change once that number flips." If you don't enjoy making videos, informing people, discussing things with people, etc. then all the cheap plaques in the world will never fill that hole. My main thought after that was "slow down, Cam. Spend (even more) time with your girlfriend. Call your parents." The things that matter get even more important as you accomplish these arbitrary milestones.

  • @TwoH.Q
    @TwoH.Q 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

    If I wasn’t married already, I would propose to you queen! This video gave me a lot of peace in this window of my life!

  • @butchshrek
    @butchshrek 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

    30-year-old single parent, currently trying to get a bachelor's degree and every day I've felt like I'm so behind and I've done it all wrong. I definitely needed to hear this because the stress can paralyze me sometimes.

  • @wemi1912
    @wemi1912 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +28

    I was literally white knuckling yesterday while driving home from school because of the stress of finals and passing my classes, so much so that I came home and couldn’t move my hand due to nerve pain. This was literally perfect timing, thank you!

  • @shesssosavvy
    @shesssosavvy 9 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

    As soon as I talked myself out of this way of thinking....
    Convincing myself time is real,
    Strict order is necessary,
    I need to hurry,
    Im far too behind,
    ....all the things.
    This video randomly plays. God, knows. He guides. He gives in his time. All I need is to just, be.
    Shout out to this YTer, thank you so much!

  • @katca
    @katca 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

    I recently received news im failing college, and i have never felt more free. I feel like i will take longer to go somewhere in life, and that is okay. This was what was meant to happen for me to mature and organize my life

  • @gladyscalderon5390
    @gladyscalderon5390 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +28

    In this modern world, and especially if we live in the US, we have to live SOOOO intentionally, so aware.

  • @kimberlypowell-young2829
    @kimberlypowell-young2829 หลายเดือนก่อน +21

    I really appreciate your content. I’m embracing rest more. And I don’t want it to just be for a ‘season’, I want it to be for life.
    Thank you for having a fresh perspective & sharing with us!
    And I love your hair!

  • @thepeculiarmaple
    @thepeculiarmaple 6 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    13:58
    When you said this....wow.
    I really do relate here

  • @vanillacenobite
    @vanillacenobite 21 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

    Thank u so much for this. It randomly came up on my feed. Im a 44 yr old white chick so i know maybe this wasnt meant for me but this really spoke to me and i just really appreciate these words. So thank you so much.

  • @chriskopeikin2702
    @chriskopeikin2702 14 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

    People are rushing because they are doing something they do not want to do and want to get it over with. Anxiety is anticipation of something you do not want to do or unsure of the outcome. We are doing this most of our lives, doing what we do not want to and feel is wrong but it’s so engrained in society. People do not like discomfort and leaving societal norms is uncomfortable.

  • @kimmcdaniel4190
    @kimmcdaniel4190 26 วันที่ผ่านมา +9

    I will be 50 in May. Taurus gang! I've been feeling this way for a few months now. Thie video is right on time💚

  • @terrestrialpress
    @terrestrialpress 7 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    This video feels so loving and kind and I am grateful to have come across it. It’s what we all need to hear.

  • @zr2jake
    @zr2jake 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    New subscriber here! Your message resonates with me so well. After a childhood where alcohol and yelling seems to cloud my memories, I don’t blame. I don’t hold contempt. I am not striving to meet arbitrary goals that are not borne out of my soul. I did tough things to get to where I am in life. The military, law enforcement, and countless front row seats to the corruption and rampant sicknesses in this system we are so easily beholden to. I don’t subscribe to judging others, fighting to impress others, or being disgusted with myself because I somehow don’t measure up. Who is doing the measuring? Only the Universe and God are monitoring me along my life path. Is it important to struggle in a rat race? Or is it more important to smell the flowers, listen to the animals, walk in the forest, and study how you are intricately woven into nature? Isn’t life lived fruitfully when you are always kind, never rushed, slow to anger, and comfortable with WHO you are? I’m
    43 and called neurodivergent. The label will not alter my course. I am finally in love with myself and my mind. I seek no validations. I trust in God.

  • @ericasmith4800
    @ericasmith4800 4 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I’m 22 and am seeking a more “unconventional” lifestyle. This video feels like a warm hug, especially coming from an older woman. Thank you for all of these gentle reminders and taking the time to share. It takes a lot to stop caring about what people think..but with time we’ll get there.

  • @DRJ-ytp
    @DRJ-ytp 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

    Whew! So wise for a young woman. Appreciate your work

  • @saltysandia
    @saltysandia 18 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

    In my 40s, I had to let go of certain misplaced, un accomplished "goals." I felt peace and started to live my life. I still have goals, but their mine! And don't let time constraints hinder me. And I embraced spontaneity. As a Latina, I understand the colonized mentality. It's real and toxic.

  • @crystallarie
    @crystallarie 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +17

    I needed this as someone who has been seen as "falling behind", but people didn't get to see the strength it took to be here at all. I've lived in fight or flight since I was born. Now I'm 24 and no degree, no job. I'm slowly taking some classes.
    I'm so tired of being stapled as poor. I live in a beautiful, gorgeous country and I'm rich just because of that. We all are, but everyone is so busy they can't enjoy the view. I had to, I was forced to after all the trauma I went through. My body told me when enough was enough, but that's an experience i wouldn't wish on anyone. So thank you so much for sharing, it means a lot and will help a lot of people realize these things so they can go at their own pace❤

  • @Lu-ot8hs
    @Lu-ot8hs 11 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

    I genuinely needed this 🥺💖
    I couldn't talk about this with my dad , about the TRUTH , these topics need highly spiritual intuitive individuals ❤

  • @virg3022
    @virg3022 10 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    This is so real. Im 24, about to graduate with a master's, but I've been beating myself up for not having a job lined up the second I graduate. Which is so unfair to myself, because I've been busy, you know, earning the degree. This is a helpful reminder to savor every second of my final semester; because it's the education itself I truly wanted out of this degree with a low financial return, but an absolutely incalculable spiritual, artistic, intellectual, and experiential "ROI."

  • @kisha91
    @kisha91 8 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    Just to add… trauma can warp one’s perspective of time. So you can feel like time is running out/ there is an urgency to complete things. So slowing down can be VERY uncomfortable, but it is crucial in healing that part of yourself.
    PS LOVED THIS VIDEO! ❤❤❤ stay blessed beloved!

  • @AH-xn9or
    @AH-xn9or 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +7

    42:29 unpacking subconscious self harm and self defeat cycles is so incredibly important. self acceptance and self compassion will take you so far. many of my internal struggles have traced back to a lack of a true and real sense of self and it’s been insanely rewarding realizing and working on that.

  • @JackieOdonnel
    @JackieOdonnel วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I'm really feeling this one. I am a really curious person, so I'd love to spend more time engaging that curiosity. Also, I legit feel like my issues (migraines, constant exhaustion, etc.) is from stress. I think slowing down has been healing me.

  • @jacquelynnware1894
    @jacquelynnware1894 12 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    I just resigned from a position to focus on my physical and mental health. I’ve felt behind, I’m an artist… and I just like fight myself sometimes that this is my path… but it is and I love being an artist and I needed to hear this talk right now. Thank you.

  • @TJ-yv3kp
    @TJ-yv3kp หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    You & Tabitha Brown always get my mind back together when the world is coming at my mind❤

  • @Alkebuland
    @Alkebuland 21 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

    Around 2003 after watching the first matrix film way too many times, made the decision to essentially "bow out" of the colonized corporation commodified mindset. Found out shorty thereafter how much resistance that would get from family & society at large. Two decades later best decision made, found out how toxic society can be & how even family members unknowingly support toxicity; once you're aware you're free though it's not easy. Happily left behind on the coporatized commodified colonized scale of things!!😊

  • @tiara2crown
    @tiara2crown 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +9

    I just heard “I’m late I’m late I’m late for a very important date” 😂 I can admit that I get frustrated with the “slowness” of my life and successes in life. I’ve always felt like I was “behind”. But I’m learning to embrace the journey. A lot of de-programming to do.

  • @helengrives1546
    @helengrives1546 8 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    Thank you! Someday I realized we don’t need to rush to the same finish. If we all live to be hundred, you need to spread out. It doesn’t make sense to do all things at the same time. Competition would dwindle. I love to take the scenery route too. Ditch the hustle broh mentality. It might be the discovery of the century, slow down time by living slowly. Being ill and recovering for 15 years, I learned to live fulfilling and slowly. I believe it is the most peaceful revolution you could have. No wars needed. A simple phase transition. You can have unlimited growth in depth, but not in destruction. The magic of hidden energy. Nature will tell us, as eventually everything will obey to the sane patterns.

  • @halliebirds
    @halliebirds 27 วันที่ผ่านมา +8

    I don’t feel at all “behind,” though I know by society’s standards I most certainly am in at least a few ways. What bothers me is feeling on a completely ~different~ track. Like, I’ve learned some things faster than others and some things slower and that’s great and fine and whatever but more often than not, that leaves me feeling like I’m not moving through the same things at the same time as anyone else, and that is ultimately what feels lonely and isolating to me.

  • @GoldenGoddessOfSilence
    @GoldenGoddessOfSilence หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    I love the idea of the journey itself actually being the destination. Never thought of it like that before ❤

  • @LannaWilson.4843
    @LannaWilson.4843 28 วันที่ผ่านมา +8

    Needed this. I literally just got up and took my dog for a walk, in the rain might I add (well a drizzle because he doesn’t play that 😂). It was a great start to my morning. I also made a point not to rush him either. I left him sniff and wander as much as he wanted.
    Also everything you said about shame is sooooo true. Earlier this year I decided I was done letting it control MY life! ❤

  • @catherineharber6514
    @catherineharber6514 20 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    Absolutely so well said ❣️ I shouldn't need the validation... But it really helps 💝.
    I've come to realize a lot of what you covered at age thirty-five. A lot of my friends and family miss being in their twenties.
    I think youth is overrated because I was full of so much anxiety from people-pleasing during my youth and twenties. Now that I'm in my thirties I say "no" or "yes" when I truly mean it and my anxiety has exponentially reduced 💫.

  • @laquatiahamlin6334
    @laquatiahamlin6334 25 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

    Hi I just discovered you and said to my self YES!! A young black woman appreciating life without the rat race. How do you discipline yourself to be apart of the “let’s get this bag” standard of living within an inner colonizers construct while still creating enough space to stay in touch with SELF and then still get to the things you enjoy doing? Doing the things you have to do so you can do the things you want to do

  • @xnoshutdownx
    @xnoshutdownx 12 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I'm so happy I found this video, as well as your channel. The last couple of years have been so stressful that I've development multiple medical issues. The part of the video about the body attacking itself from not being kind to it deeply resonated with me. I'm looking forward to 2025 and taking the scenic route in life.

  • @Happynappyroots96
    @Happynappyroots96 5 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    This is just the talk that I needed, I’m 28 I feel so behind in life and so upset because of it. I needed to hear this, I want to be happy again

  • @HeyPaulaCooper
    @HeyPaulaCooper 18 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    This video found me when I really needed it. Thank you. Also, there is this sentiment I read about online a while back that helped me very much, it is something like: when you think about something you want to do but you think maybe I'm too old or it is going to take a lot of years/time (like getting a degree for example) think about how that time that takes to accomplish it is going to pass anyway, do you want 4 years to go by or do you want 4 years to go by and after that you have your degree?

  • @MargieLeigh3
    @MargieLeigh3 9 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    needed this. i had to drop out of college and move home for my mental health. i’ve got my first ‘big girl’ job which i’m proud of but i feel like a failure. i have loans and no degree to show for it. in reality, i did the best with the hand i was dealt - and some of my ‘plays’ were bad. but it’s ab how i turn that around for the better and learn better finances, learn how i LEARN better in a non traditional environment. like everything is how it is because it’s meant to be that way - either it’s for you or for you to learn from

  • @breatheasy333
    @breatheasy333 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +21

    “Sometimes the dream or the destination you think you want to go to is just an invitation to get on the road.” - Alecia Renece
    (Danngg… TRUTH. Let us pollinate that exact idea you phrased beautifully. yess)

  • @Positively_Radiant_Nia888
    @Positively_Radiant_Nia888 21 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

    This is such an on time confirmation. I thank the Heavens for sending you to me. Thank you for loving your life 🥰✨️✨️

  • @PrismDH
    @PrismDH 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    I have been feeling lost after losing my job and my fiance was sick and we got evicted from out apartments and had to stay with my mom. If i didnt have her there i would be on the streets right now. I since had moved out shortly after which amazon forced my fiance to take a short term disability leave then tried to deny it until we showed the government proof of his dr's appointments. We almost got evicted from our new place because amazon didnt want to pay for months. Then he was serving at ihop and they "promoted" him and didnt want to pay him for 65 hours that we are still fighting to get now. All of this is to say i am making i through this. I have learned to create again and am making art everyday and have such joy and love in my heart and family. He now works for a security guard that patrols our apartments and other places on our street and we are almost caught up on all bills. Take the time to live. You are worth it.

  • @Liv9660
    @Liv9660 19 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    I knew immediately that I was meant to listen to this video when you said DMV. I’m DMV born and raised. Miss it so much. Thank you for the wisdom

  • @Harmoniousteak
    @Harmoniousteak 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

    The title alone healed me

  • @BijouterieBlings
    @BijouterieBlings 6 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    My God! This was such a blessing to me. Just today I’m feeling like I’m breaking down and you hit in everything that has been bothering me. God bless you and your family. This was a God sent message.

  • @sarahshanahan2222
    @sarahshanahan2222 19 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    😢😢😢 thanks so much for saying this.
    When look at my investment portfolio i cant help but tell myself this.
    I just gotta keep on towards my goal and not beat myself up about it

  • @MiryssaRayne
    @MiryssaRayne 11 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    HEAVY on the inner colonizer part!!! So beautifully worded and I’m so glad I clicked ❤️

  • @katrinaseymour6666
    @katrinaseymour6666 6 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I am seventy and hitting this age bought on a lot of feelings. I thought I would be at a certain place or be a certain person by this time. I didn’t want to retire early but life circumstances placed me there at sixty-two (helping my only child (at least on this side) establish himself which I did). But I got lost along the journey because I was mourning what I thought I was missing or thought of what I was suppose to be or do. Recently, my heart told me to accept where I am, and stop crying over the past, and where I think I should have been or what I think I should be. My heart told me until I do, I will not be able to appreciate the material I have to build a new life. Right where I am at seventy with no stress, no specific expectations but a brand new clean slate to build a life of my construct, per se, but a life to now just simply to enjoy. Knowing that the birds of the air and the flowers of the field are taken care of by the Father, and I am so much more than these to my Father who promised to take care of me too.

  • @belindamarie3222
    @belindamarie3222 29 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

    Yes!! I've always marched to the beat of my own drum..and indeed I've have lost the respect and admiration of some. I love what you said "itheir eyes cannot even see you"
    So why in the world should I feel the need to prove anything to those other's. Please yourself..this is your life.

  • @MTANB
    @MTANB 21 วันที่ผ่านมา +4

    Late Bloomer is a beautiful, DIVINE Message! Gratitude 🙏🏿💜🧡💛🤍🩵💙

  • @divyadiva84
    @divyadiva84 9 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    Beautiful video and beautiful comments. Love. ❤️ Thanks No need to be in stress. No need to be bitter.

  • @OG_lesliedixon
    @OG_lesliedixon 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +8

    When you said “inner colonizer” I sat up straighter. This!

    • @Marthaz-jl7tv
      @Marthaz-jl7tv 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      That's what other people call a "work ethic".

    • @OG_lesliedixon
      @OG_lesliedixon 15 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @ Yes!🙌🏻

  • @brialeea9078
    @brialeea9078 24 วันที่ผ่านมา +10

    I’m 26 & I haven’t gotten my masters yet and I will admit I’ve been struggling with my self esteem because I feel like I should have gotten my masters two years ago but this was very helpful ❤

    • @concernedcitizen6933
      @concernedcitizen6933 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +10

      I've just started my MSc at 40, my grandfather did his masters in his 70s. You're fine sweetheart, we're all on our own timeline ❤

    • @ledafrost
      @ledafrost 7 วันที่ผ่านมา

      I remember telling my professor I wanted to get my masters by 25. He said, why? How can you be a master of anything if you've just begun living?

  • @soundslikealexis
    @soundslikealexis 5 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    Girl I am so happy for you, I was tryna figure out where youve been at❤❤❤❤

  • @dootdaah7759
    @dootdaah7759 9 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    thank you so much for this. everything you said was super validating for me because I decided to watch this video seeking some sort of comfort for my current state of being in life and you not only provided that, but then some extra, and much more. I don't think I've ever come out of a youtube video being so positively impacted haha lol. but yeah your message is definitely going to stick with me, and I'm sure a lot of other people here as well. keep doing what you're doing and just thank you again

  • @KishUnleashed
    @KishUnleashed 14 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    I relate to this message so much. Thank you for using your voice 🌹

  • @rose1742
    @rose1742 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    My sister 💕 🌸 thank you so much for this. The world can be so harsh to us, so we need to be our own advocates, our own cheerleaders, and our own nurturers-not just another bully.

  • @allthingsAJB
    @allthingsAJB 10 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I Stubbled across The Best Video to Watch to close out this Year !! ❤🎉 Thank You For making this video 😊

  • @trashaccount5106
    @trashaccount5106 21 วันที่ผ่านมา +6

    What a beautiful message, thank you for recording and posting it for us

  • @sueorosz8886
    @sueorosz8886 15 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I grew up in Montgomery county md. so I get it!!!! Humans make a lot of things up… fill in the blanks… lol ❤ your words are gentle… love it! 🥰 I didn’t graduate from college until age 31! I was so glad I made it thru!!!!!

  • @Chaitogether
    @Chaitogether 23 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

    Pause! The part where you said you’ve been lying to yourself about parts that aren’t true for you!!!! I’m here with you!!! This is speaking to me ❤😊🎉

  • @BlessedAngel07
    @BlessedAngel07 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    Girl. Your song at the end blessed me. I have it on repeat❤ thank you for this video!

  • @probsnooneyouknowtbh3712
    @probsnooneyouknowtbh3712 22 วันที่ผ่านมา +28

    As a neurodivergent person who has always reached all of my important life milestones after my peers, this hits 😭
    I just graduated with my bachelor's at 25 and I'm struggling to even be proud of it because of reasons like "how long it took me" or "my brother had his master's by this age." I forget that 5 years ago I was despairing that I would ever even get this far. That's the thing about putting your entire worth on your achievements; as soon as you accomplish the thing you're convinced will finally make you "good enough," your brain just wants to move the goalpost higher.

    • @saf1999
      @saf1999 21 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

      Congratulations on your degree. I relate to this , the goalposts is always moved. I’m also 25

    • @mosimosi630
      @mosimosi630 17 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      I’m proud of you you’ve done incredible things to get here try to ignore the people who don’t see what you’ve done for yourself

    • @freshdumpling
      @freshdumpling 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

      Funny how people say 25 is old. I finished my degree at 41