I NEEDED THIS, THANK YOU SO MUCH! I can't afford therapy or anything but watching videos like this give me relief knowing about it, I feel it getting better by working on this. I just wanna know does it fade away? I know of a person on youtube who has had this and she is married to this person who she has had this with.
This was outstanding. Please do more on ROCD!! I'll be making many notes from what you have so succinctly and clearly explained here. Thank you! Do you do international Skype appointments?
I have an OCD therapist trained in ERP and watched videos on ROCD and I have yet to get one question answered: what would a neurotypical person do if they question whether the relationship is right from them? I need context to understand what is "normal" relationship questioning and what is ROCD.
OCD makes u question everything 😢it’s the hardest thing a human being can face😭😭the feelings are too much right now my ocd is telling me to recover deleted messages I did not see which is almost impossible 😢
Is not going on social media to check out his exes avoidance? Will the fear that I’m not the best looking ever go away? Will i ever be ok with not being the best looking? Why do i care so much? Oh and why do I feel the need to analyze his past relationships - why they ended, if he still loved them when they ended, did he ever want to get back together with them, did he love them more than he loves me, did he regret the break ups, would he rather be back with them than be with me, if he could choose to be with any of us, would he choose me? Etc etc. I feel like I can never be settled and that’s a fear. Sometimes I think it would just be easier to be alone. Thank you!!
patti8178 hey patti! i don’t have the same rocd thoughts as you so i can’t answer your first questions but i do think about “it would be easier if i was alone”. i honestly think that every single person in the world thinks that occasionally. so don’t feel too bad about that. that’s normal.
I had the same exact compulsions. I had to be the best looking, I had to be the only one he adored. For me, it's still a trigger, but it is NO WHERE what it was. What really helped me was pinpointing my jealousy. Why did I focus on looks so much? Turned out I always thought since childhood my beauty was my only worth, since I was praised for it since I was young. Once I realized that, I started to begin to love myself for my other qualities, not putting so much on beauty. Another thing that helped me was this realization: jealousy makes you ugly. Praising and admiring other womens beauty, only adds to your own. Remember that.
I relate so hard!!! I have gone over and over his social media wondering who these women are, why is he following them, are they prettier then me, does he want them more than he wants me etc... it’s exhausting
@patti8178 all I have to say is, are we sure you wrote that and not me. Everything you said was literally word for word my OCD a few years back. It got really bad. I think it’s better but I won’t really find out for sure till I date again I suppose. I can’t recommend ERP enough. Any other counseling could just reinforce the rumination by entertaining discussion about the content when really content with OCD is irrelevant and should be treated that way. I had some very well intended therapists over the years who would validate my concerns and make me feel understood etc and granted that might’ve made me feel better for the day or a short while it of course didn’t do a damn thing for my OCD in the long run. The answer to why you care so much... if you have OCD, then there’s your answer. And probably more accurate to say it’s the OCD that cares so much. If you learn about what’s going on brain wise it starts to make sense... But I feel your pain, ROCD sucks hardcore but you’re not alone and best of all there is treatment, good treatment, out there so relief and recovery are possible. Best of luck!
Today I was watching videos on how to stop the compulsions, then I saw that exposing them would improve, and suddenly when I saw that it would improve I stopped feeling the compulsions, it seemed more like my brain saw that I found the solution, and now that I'm not feeling the compulsions anymore it seems that I do not care about my relationship, and I really want to care, someone help me? has anyone gone through this?
Hey i know its been a month so im a little late but im pretty sure this is normal i just just started recovery and it can be worse before it gets better (like i was in the er for panic attacks literally 2 days ago) i find if u just let the thoughts sit there and try not to ruminate (like just tell yourself “this is just ocd im moving on from this thought now”) it honestly has helped a ton i still have a lot of rocd triggers and dissociation but i feel a lot better and feels easier to ignore these thoughts
Hello. I don't know what stage I'm at but something's bothering me. I have ROCD for a few years but I've always been on off and I always got rid of. A few weeks ago he came back, at first I had anxiety but for a few days I no longer have, which scares me even more and makes me feel the thoughts like being true. I think the fact that I don't have anxiety scares me even more and I believe in thoughts. I also have moments in the day when I don't have these thoughts, as if everything is fine, but immediately appear again. I show up especially when I'm around my boyfriend, it's like my mind is making sure it's the way he says it is, that I don't love him. It's not something I'm thinking, it shows up in seconds one when I see it. that gives me the feeling that these thoughts are real. how can I do ERP correctly? And why do they feel so real?
dont believe the thoughts! For me the majority of days are okay and then i have bad days like 2 or 3, but if u look it that way, u love ur partner right? and there is no way someone can be able to fake the love on good days, and imagine if u didnt have those bad days and thoughts everything would be fine. So just try to believe that the thoughts that ur feeling on ur bad days arent real and that are only worrying u. I am no expert but i explain it this way to myself. Please anyone else?
Also.... how is it healthy to not bring up OCD to our partner? Sure, talking about it allll the time could be troubling, but I think there are plenty of people who have ocd and are in great relationships. It depends on who their partner is and also if the ocd sufferer is trying to help the ocd. But to just pretend you don’t have ocd seems misleading and also how can we communicate any potential triggers if we don’t talk about it? I see how recovery is our responsibility but the people around us can help. For example, if my boyfriend doesn’t message me for hours at a time and I have no idea what he is doing I might start obsessing is our relationship okay or is he okay? But if he shoots me a quick message, I’ll be fine. I don’t find that an unreasonable request. I don’t feel bringing up my ocd/anxiety like that is bad or telling him my struggles. If ocd makes you wonder if your partner is cheating and you become controlling.. well that seems unhealthy. But in general, how is ocd unhealthy to the relationship of two people are communicating and putting in effort? How is it harmful to talk about the ocd? Thanks.
i’m in a really healthy relationship and so i tell my boyfriend everything. i break it all down to him so he knows i’m not going to leave him no matter what, this has NOTHING to do with us (bc it’s all about me), and that all i need from him is his strength, support and love as i go through this road of recovery. i even watch videos with him so we both better understand and now he’s more educated than i am lol.
The point is to not give OCD any power or attention. If you keep talking about it, it’ll never go away because you’re hanging on to the idea that you have a problem. OCD loves holding onto ideas that you have a problem. You need to face it head on by claiming your power back and disregarding it. It’s all lies. You can continue to go on with the OCD cycle forever and ever if you don’t let it go.
Mine started when i was accused back to back, i never would cheat im the loyalist ever i dont believe in unfaithfulness but i was so emotional that he didnt believe me then the thought hit... is that normal for ocd?
Its crazy thoughts like “what if i cheated and just forgot” “what if i sent a picture of myself a few days into our relationship a year ago and just forgot” crazy things
I’m not a therapist or anything, just another ROCD sufferer, and I struggle with “but do I love my partner” all the time. I’ve learned that the rumination on this question, checking my feelings during our interactions or analyzing his character to try and “figure it out” actually prevents me from feeling the “feelings of love” that I’m looking for because it takes me out of the present moment. It gives me horrible anxiety, and then that freaks me out and makes the doubt have more strength. If, instead of asking “do I love my partner” you think of love just as a choice to be with your partner, you can just focus on choosing in that moment. Just acknowledge that there is still that question about your feelings in your mind, but it’s okay to still choose to love and be with your partner. Once the urgency to figure it out starts to fade, you will have more clarity about your relationship and feelings-but the obsessive need to answer that question right now will make everything too cloudy to actually find an answer to it. Hope that helps, and know you are not alone!
I feel like it is kind of triggering to say that OCD can harm relationships and the other person “can’t handle it.” I mean, I understand it’s better for relationships to not have OCD, but a fear of mine, and part of my OCD is that my boyfriend won’t be able to handle it. Even though I’m really working on it. So what do I do about that fear/OCD?
Same as any other thought/obsession/theme . accept it , sit with it and ignore it , the fear or obsession may look different but it isn't , it's just OCD as always trying to pull a sneaky on you, stay on the road to recovery and remember no matter how it presents itself it is still just OCD . eventually after a while you will start to feel better.
@@GamePlaySStuff he is a human after all,its normal if he cant handle it,i suffer from this about 6months but if my boyfriend can’t handle it anymore i will understand him
Plz help plz. My husband is driving me crazy he has ROCD.. but I’m his victim.. and constantly being accused of unrealistic accusations.. how about the partner of one diagnosed ROCD! Plz help
Ali what did you just said?..if the thoughts are coming every single day and ever single time just have to disregard it and it will be forever...did you just said that?..what does it mean. Please I need answer or you just mistakenly said this?
I’m so sorry to hear! I have rocd too and am still with my partner. Sometimes its hard but I try to hold on to the thought that it will be okay. I think she should talk to someone who experiences the same things as her. She can always talk to me
Ali is God’s gift to OCD sufferers
This video is all i need for the rest of my life. I hope everyone get recover by time from OCD 💙🙏
I NEEDED THIS, THANK YOU SO MUCH! I can't afford therapy or anything but watching videos like this give me relief knowing about it, I feel it getting better by working on this. I just wanna know does it fade away? I know of a person on youtube who has had this and she is married to this person who she has had this with.
Is it better now? Because i also "treat" my rocd with these videos
This was outstanding. Please do more on ROCD!! I'll be making many notes from what you have so succinctly and clearly explained here. Thank you! Do you do international Skype appointments?
I have an OCD therapist trained in ERP and watched videos on ROCD and I have yet to get one question answered: what would a neurotypical person do if they question whether the relationship is right from them? I need context to understand what is "normal" relationship questioning and what is ROCD.
OCD makes u question everything 😢it’s the hardest thing a human being can face😭😭the feelings are too much right now my ocd is telling me to recover deleted messages I did not see which is almost impossible 😢
Is not going on social media to check out his exes avoidance? Will the fear that I’m not the best looking ever go away? Will i ever be ok with not being the best looking? Why do i care so much?
Oh and why do I feel the need to analyze his past relationships - why they ended, if he still loved them when they ended, did he ever want to get back together with them, did he love them more than he loves me, did he regret the break ups, would he rather be back with them than be with me, if he could choose to be with any of us, would he choose me? Etc etc.
I feel like I can never be settled and that’s a fear. Sometimes I think it would just be easier to be alone.
Thank you!!
patti8178 hey patti! i don’t have the same rocd thoughts as you so i can’t answer your first questions but i do think about “it would be easier if i was alone”. i honestly think that every single person in the world thinks that occasionally. so don’t feel too bad about that. that’s normal.
I had the same exact compulsions. I had to be the best looking, I had to be the only one he adored. For me, it's still a trigger, but it is NO WHERE what it was. What really helped me was pinpointing my jealousy. Why did I focus on looks so much? Turned out I always thought since childhood my beauty was my only worth, since I was praised for it since I was young. Once I realized that, I started to begin to love myself for my other qualities, not putting so much on beauty. Another thing that helped me was this realization: jealousy makes you ugly. Praising and admiring other womens beauty, only adds to your own. Remember that.
I relate so hard!!! I have gone over and over his social media wondering who these women are, why is he following them, are they prettier then me, does he want them more than he wants me etc... it’s exhausting
@patti8178 all I have to say is, are we sure you wrote that and not me. Everything you said was literally word for word my OCD a few years back. It got really bad. I think it’s better but I won’t really find out for sure till I date again I suppose. I can’t recommend ERP enough. Any other counseling could just reinforce the rumination by entertaining discussion about the content when really content with OCD is irrelevant and should be treated that way. I had some very well intended therapists over the years who would validate my concerns and make me feel understood etc and granted that might’ve made me feel better for the day or a short while it of course didn’t do a damn thing for my OCD in the long run. The answer to why you care so much... if you have OCD, then there’s your answer. And probably more accurate to say it’s the OCD that cares so much. If you learn about what’s going on brain wise it starts to make sense... But I feel your pain, ROCD sucks hardcore but you’re not alone and best of all there is treatment, good treatment, out there so relief and recovery are possible. Best of luck!
I hope you’re doing okay
I heard about you on NOCD app. Thank you Ali :)
What's that?
I so needed this. Thank you so much 🙏
Today I was watching videos on how to stop the compulsions, then I saw that exposing them would improve, and suddenly when I saw that it would improve I stopped feeling the compulsions, it seemed more like my brain saw that I found the solution, and now that I'm not feeling the compulsions anymore it seems that I do not care about my relationship, and I really want to care, someone help me? has anyone gone through this?
Hey i know its been a month so im a little late but im pretty sure this is normal i just just started recovery and it can be worse before it gets better (like i was in the er for panic attacks literally 2 days ago) i find if u just let the thoughts sit there and try not to ruminate (like just tell yourself “this is just ocd im moving on from this thought now”) it honestly has helped a ton i still have a lot of rocd triggers and dissociation but i feel a lot better and feels easier to ignore these thoughts
This is so helpful♥️♥️♥️
Thanks for valuable video
Hello. I don't know what stage I'm at but something's bothering me. I have ROCD for a few years but I've always been on off and I always got rid of. A few weeks ago he came back, at first I had anxiety but for a few days I no longer have, which scares me even more and makes me feel the thoughts like being true. I think the fact that I don't have anxiety scares me even more and I believe in thoughts. I also have moments in the day when I don't have these thoughts, as if everything is fine, but immediately appear again. I show up especially when I'm around my boyfriend, it's like my mind is making sure it's the way he says it is, that I don't love him. It's not something I'm thinking, it shows up in seconds one when I see it. that gives me the feeling that these thoughts are real. how can I do ERP correctly? And why do they feel so real?
same same same
dont believe the thoughts! For me the majority of days are okay and then i have bad days like 2 or 3, but if u look it that way, u love ur partner right? and there is no way someone can be able to fake the love on good days, and imagine if u didnt have those bad days and thoughts everything would be fine. So just try to believe that the thoughts that ur feeling on ur bad days arent real and that are only worrying u. I am no expert but i explain it this way to myself. Please anyone else?
th-cam.com/video/Nly_3jeZ2Wc/w-d-xo.html
Also.... how is it healthy to not bring up OCD to our partner? Sure, talking about it allll the time could be troubling, but I think there are plenty of people who have ocd and are in great relationships. It depends on who their partner is and also if the ocd sufferer is trying to help the ocd. But to just pretend you don’t have ocd seems misleading and also how can we communicate any potential triggers if we don’t talk about it? I see how recovery is our responsibility but the people around us can help. For example, if my boyfriend doesn’t message me for hours at a time and I have no idea what he is doing I might start obsessing is our relationship okay or is he okay? But if he shoots me a quick message, I’ll be fine. I don’t find that an unreasonable request. I don’t feel bringing up my ocd/anxiety like that is bad or telling him my struggles. If ocd makes you wonder if your partner is cheating and you become controlling.. well that seems unhealthy. But in general, how is ocd unhealthy to the relationship of two people are communicating and putting in effort? How is it harmful to talk about the ocd? Thanks.
i’m in a really healthy relationship and so i tell my boyfriend everything. i break it all down to him so he knows i’m not going to leave him no matter what, this has NOTHING to do with us (bc it’s all about me), and that all i need from him is his strength, support and love as i go through this road of recovery. i even watch videos with him so we both better understand and now he’s more educated than i am lol.
The point is to not give OCD any power or attention. If you keep talking about it, it’ll never go away because you’re hanging on to the idea that you have a problem. OCD loves holding onto ideas that you have a problem. You need to face it head on by claiming your power back and disregarding it. It’s all lies. You can continue to go on with the OCD cycle forever and ever if you don’t let it go.
Mine started when i was accused back to back, i never would cheat im the loyalist ever i dont believe in unfaithfulness but i was so emotional that he didnt believe me then the thought hit... is that normal for ocd?
Its crazy thoughts like “what if i cheated and just forgot” “what if i sent a picture of myself a few days into our relationship a year ago and just forgot” crazy things
Yep normal for OCD
But DO I LOVE HER, im confident that i have ROCD but how should i know that i love her?pls help someone
I’m not a therapist or anything, just another ROCD sufferer, and I struggle with “but do I love my partner” all the time. I’ve learned that the rumination on this question, checking my feelings during our interactions or analyzing his character to try and “figure it out” actually prevents me from feeling the “feelings of love” that I’m looking for because it takes me out of the present moment. It gives me horrible anxiety, and then that freaks me out and makes the doubt have more strength. If, instead of asking “do I love my partner” you think of love just as a choice to be with your partner, you can just focus on choosing in that moment. Just acknowledge that there is still that question about your feelings in your mind, but it’s okay to still choose to love and be with your partner. Once the urgency to figure it out starts to fade, you will have more clarity about your relationship and feelings-but the obsessive need to answer that question right now will make everything too cloudy to actually find an answer to it. Hope that helps, and know you are not alone!
@@annasodaro9478 Anna did you find the question or thought, rather just came out of the blue?
I feel like it is kind of triggering to say that OCD can harm relationships and the other person “can’t handle it.” I mean, I understand it’s better for relationships to not have OCD, but a fear of mine, and part of my OCD is that my boyfriend won’t be able to handle it. Even though I’m really working on it. So what do I do about that fear/OCD?
Same as any other thought/obsession/theme . accept it , sit with it and ignore it , the fear or obsession may look different but it isn't , it's just OCD as always trying to pull a sneaky on you, stay on the road to recovery and remember no matter how it presents itself it is still just OCD . eventually after a while you will start to feel better.
If he doesn't handle it, he wasn't the one for you. Simple.
@@GamePlaySStuff he is a human after all,its normal if he cant handle it,i suffer from this about 6months but if my boyfriend can’t handle it anymore i will understand him
@@GamePlaySStuff really dumb answer
THANK U !!! 💫
Plz help plz. My husband is driving me crazy he has ROCD.. but I’m his victim.. and constantly being accused of unrealistic accusations.. how about the partner of one diagnosed ROCD! Plz help
check on google rocd reddit. you will find posts regarding partner with rocd.
You can watch awaken into love channel, there's lots of information about rocd and also for partners of people who has ocd. Maybe it'll help you
Hi Ali do you have any erp advice for retro active jealousy ocd
Ali what did you just said?..if the thoughts are coming every single day and ever single time just have to disregard it and it will be forever...did you just said that?..what does it mean. Please I need answer or you just mistakenly said this?
What if rocd hurt my relationship?
I’ve had it for 3 years now.
How are u feeling now???
Tq😊
my gf broke up with me because of rocd. what should i do?
I’m so sorry to hear! I have rocd too and am still with my partner. Sometimes its hard but I try to hold on to the thought that it will be okay. I think she should talk to someone who experiences the same things as her. She can always talk to me
Lottie Oost would u be down to talk? I’m a fellow ROCD sufferer and I am dying 🙃
@@thatgirl5630 i will talk with YOU ☺️
She was not the girl for you :)
Расскажите про этот тип ОКР на русском пожалуйста 🙏 и как бороться с ним
Disregard, but then Also active exposure every now and then where you basically treat your thoughts as if they were real. Right?
Dose the OCD become dangerous in future in people life 🙄🙄🙄???
No, people with OCD are the least dangerous humans in the planet, except for themselves.
@@GamePlaySStuff r u suffring from ocd🙄🙄
@@honeykumar5448 yup, diagnosed.
@@GamePlaySStuff which type of ocd u have 🙄??????
I've migrated themes during my whole life, but Harm OCD and ROCD are my main themes. Also hypocondria which is a subset of ocd.