INFERTILITY...What I Wish I Would Have Known 10 Years Ago
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 ก.ย. 2024
- Our whole lives we are constantly learning and growing...and sometimes we learn things we wish we would have known in the past.
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Hi! We are Phil and Alex! After leaving California in an RV, traveling full time, and helping our littlest with an open heart surgery, we've settled down in Tennessee. We found our homestead land and are learning each day how to live a more sustainable life. We are a family grown through the miracle of Adoption & Infertility Treatments. Our precious daughters are Kinsley Grace (8 years old), Callie Jo (6 years old), and Cassidy Drew (3). Our passion is to encourage families through infertility, adoption and building stronger healthier families. Thank you for tuning in! We hope you are encouraged!
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/ alexcongelliere
/ philconge
philandalex
EMAIL US: PhilAndAlexC@gmail.com
PO Box: 810 Oak Meadow Drive 681808 Franklin, TN 37068
Music by Epidemic Sounds
As you know I only had 1 pregnancy an lost my baby at 4 1/2 month's!!! I am 61 now and was never able to have children!!! I look forward to meeting my daughter in heaven!!! When the time comes!!! God Bless You All!!!
❤
I have 2 babies in heaven, and 3 sons earthside, after 10 years of infertility.
I have one stillborn baby boy (onyx) I hope to see again one day! 😢❤
I can't get over how quickly it seems Cassidy has grown. I feel like she should still be a baby. Love hearing her talk.
I have been with you from the very beginning. And now I am sitting here watching your video holding my 10 day old son, who we got through adoption. No more empty arms! Thank you for making sure I have hope to cope
Congratulations Mama!! Enjoy! ❤❤
I foster shy and underweight kittens. I've been doing it for almost 8 years. It is my passion and I'll know that if my arms stay forever empty, that fostering kittens is what my calling is. To me, there is nothing in the world like knowing I am the first human that has ever heard this cat's purr. It is so rewarding!
❤ What a wonderful gift you are giving to the world! Taking care of cats and kittens is a loving way to spend your time.
You just made me figure out my Hobbie. It's being a fur mama. I have 4 living felines and 2 that passed on within the last year. Plus I have a pup. My fur babies bring so much happiness, loyalty, love, and excitement to my life! ❤
From an older woman with grown children. Your family will grow. Son-in-laws. Grandchildren. Great Grandchildren. Genealogy is my hobby. I’m glad you found yours. Homesteading gives you purpose. You’ll be able to pass your knowledge down for generations.
I am so petrified of not being a grandmother. I’m still grieving not having more than one child, and I find it very to scary to have just one grown son and I’m too old to have another. Not, that I could in my situation. I live in isolation, across the country from my parents who are elderly. It’s such a tough stage for me. I feel that loss is all that is coming. So much potential for grief to continue, and I already have real regrets. I’ve gotten into gardening, and it’s helping but I’m struggling with my weight so much, I don’t actually socialize anymore. This stage hurts. I didn’t listen to my inner voice even though it was screaming.
Feeling like I need some help, but I don’t know where to find it.
I've found that encouraging as well. ❤️
This hasn't helped. She still mourns.
1:13... not even 2 minutes into this vlog and I'm blown away at how talkative Cassidy is! She is so cute!! Hahaha
After three miscarriages my daughter suffered an ectopic pregnancy today. I had three healthy pregnancy’s and never had any issues. So, this has been a heartbreaking trial, seeing my daughter go through this. But God. I know He is exceedingly & abundantly able to heal her. Meanwhile, she and I are also staying busy in her beautiful garden. I’ve watched your site for years now, since Callie was a baby. Thank you for sharing your heart, and grieve as much as you need to. I don’t think God is finished with y’all, just yet. ❤
I went through secondary infertility. I had two children before the age of 19,(14 months apart) then when I remarried at 24, our plan was only one more. We learned we had both male factor and I had PCOS. I- tried med cycles, IUIs, and one Ivf cycle with zero eggs that fertilized, only to learn prior to a second IVF cycle that I had uterine cancer and had to have a complete hysterectomy at 27. We ended up adopting special needs children from foster care 10 years later when I became a special needs nurse, and now more than 20 years after my original dx, and 25 years of marriage we have 6 kids, 2 grown and married five grand children, along with a 13 year old and 3 9 y/o... what is it they say tell God your plan...
I don't have cancer but the other things I'm dealing with are exactly what you dealt with. 2 perfect babies with my ex husband then later got remarried and we want a child together but it's going on 2 years now and no babies, have not been diagnosed with PCOS officially but I know the signs and I have a lot of friends who have it.
@@candicecausey4960❤
The look on Alexs face is a momma who got to FINALLY experience pregnancy BUT did not know that could potentially have been the first and last. How incredibly difficult it is to grieve the last of anything especially as a woman and mother, to experience your last pregnancy it is something I personally struggled with after my first IVF daughter because we thought we were one and done but something inside me said no. I'm so sorry Alex grieving is SO HARD and I hate that infertility leads to all these feelings it makes us want to just curl up into a ball, but I am glad that you can distract your heart with the busyness of your life. May God let his will be done and I pray that will is more babies and pregnancies in your future
Went through infertility for 2.5 years, then God blessed us with our miracle boy! I relate to having that thing that helped me through that time. It was my job in music teaching. But then I found an infertility support group called Moms in the Making and that helped so much! So much so I now lead two groups for them! But now I’m back in the wait for baby number 2. Almost for two years at this point. I’m believing I’m pregnant RIGHT NOW! (In the TWW!) but something that has truly sparked in me this time around has been crocheting. I’m a creative and I can’t do some of the things I used to do before. We’ve moved to a different area and my community is different. I can’t do the same music things here that I so loved before. So I’ve found an outlet in learning to crochet. I’d never done it before a few months ago. But I’ve made one blanket and working on a second. The first one I’m giving to my new baby whenever they arrive. The second I’m gifting to a lady in my support group for her baby. She had an IUI and is pregnant. I plan to do this for every new baby my groups have! It just gives me goals, gives me purpose to love on others, and to pray over the ones I’m gifting the blankets to as I make them! It’s been really helpful, just like your garden for you and it helps build my hope and faith!
I know this is a long delayed response but how is your ttc journey going? I remember the heartache and pain it can be, I have secondary infertility. Have not tried since I left my ex husband who had issues with his sleek as well so we had four losses, but I’ve been with my partner for over a year now and I’m finally feeling ready to start trying again when he is ready. I wish you the best on your journey x
Cassidy is adorable!! Enjoy! Everyone with children has a last child, just take it all in! ❤ I remember being in tears thinking about everything happening for the last time, but I learned just enjoy the ages they are at!! I had a miscarriage for my first pregnancy, it was awful, two years later after wondering whether it would ever happen, I had 3 babies 3 years apart and then adopted a newborn at the age of 47! I am so blessed! God has a plan for each one of us, one you can’t even imagine!
*Sometimes when we get so focused on what we want, or what we do NOT have, we forget to have an overwhelming heart ♥ of PURE gratitude for what we have ALREADY been BLESSED so IMMENSELY with!!! It is easy for us to stay in a constant state of want and overlook what God has so graciously bestowed upon us right before our eyes. Sending much love, light, prayers and an abundance of beautiful blessings to all of you!!*
This is really beautiful ❤
That’s not what they do in any way, so what’s the point in saying what you said?
Omg!! I can't believe how big Cassidy is getting. She is adorable!!♥️
OMG...Cassidy is absolutely precious. Her sweet voice melts my heart.
I am retired and in my 70’s. I had to retire to find time for my hobbys! I joined 100Grannies for a livable future, an environmental organization which I am obsessed with. My second hobby is water color painting. The grannies group has written 4 children’s books and I illustrated the last one! When I first started painting I was painting note cards. Now I have them printed and I sell them in 4 local businesses and I frame the originals and sell those in another shop. I love the way your family is living in a sustainable way. My husband and I just had solar panels installed earlier this year! We’re doing what we can, not the way you are, but the best we can at our age. ❤❤❤
Alex I feel you girl!! I’ve had 5 failed IVFs and 2 failed transfers. It seems unreal that I’m in this season of life. I am grateful for the son I do have. But I still have this unbearable heartache for another baby. Infertility is so cruel. But we’re going to see about fostering. That maybe the next chapter for me.
My little 4 yo grandson is non verbal. I love hearing toddler chatter. I would appreciate prayers for him to open up to language soon!
Hi Karen♡~Fellow Nana of 4 Lovely Girlies & 1 Little Guy here:) May I please ask your Precious Grandson's name so can be PRAYing for HIM everyday☆☆!!
Blessings & Hugs from already HOT Arizona, Holy
@@sterlingmatsui154 “Bodhi”.
I am an American mommy living in Japan, I'm going to be praying for your Bodhi that his voice be opened through music, this has helped our 2 daughters not be shy, to sharing their feelings and be vocal in a good way, so I pray through music he can become the vocal voice you all desire to hear, God bless you 🙏🙏👫👨👩👧👧🗾🌏🗻
Have his mama look into Medical Medium protocols. Autistic kids are healing on them!
I saw your comment and wanted to reach out and say that I am a Registered Behavioral Therapist who works in ABA (who specifically uses positive reinforcement, no punishment or holding) and I encourage you to look into any facilities around you that may offer that. Usually insurance will cover. I have helped many kids who were non-verbal in communicating their first words. I can’t promise fast results, but it’s amazing what the field can do. Praying for your grandson!
What a great life Mom & Dad has provided for their 3 precious girls❤
Dearest Alex, your grief is real and you are allowed to acknowledge it. Yes, it is helpful to have a hobby to bring you joy but these feelings will probably never completely go away. I'm 66 and suffered from infertility and was blessed to be able to adopt one baby. During my younger years, I longed to be pregnant or for us to be able to adopt more children. Now my adult son has a daughter who is the joy of my life. Believe it or not, sometimes I still wonder what it would have been like to feel life growing in my womb, what it would have been like to nurse my baby and so on. I have said all this meaning to convey that your feelings are yours and it's ok
as long as you need to grieve.
I so agree with the need to grieve in whatever season you are in that grief. For grief changes as life changes and you always bring what you are grieving for, with you, through the other stages as time goes on.
I met an elderly woman in the pharmacy and we both shared our miscarriage stories and it’s just a pain understood only by those who’ve experienced it
Kids get big. That’s their job. Learn to love and appreciate every single stage. While I miss my kids being little little I’m having SO much fun with them as they are getting older. Having another baby would take time and focus away from my older kids so I’ve learned to let that go. I know it’s hard but try to focus on the things you have instead of the things you don’t. You have a lot to be thankful for. Big hugs and prayers to you.
This. I’m sad my preschooler is in her last year of little kid life, but happy she is growing strong and wise. I do have regrets though. I wish I had more playful times with her and less worrying. You live, you learn.
All the little girls are beautiful, clever and so pleasant. Cassidy is a star, looks so much like Phil and his Mother.
Oh my gosh, my heart! Cassidy has grown so much 🥰
Like you, I am so grateful that I have a child now, the empty arms phase of infertility was utterly heartbreaking. Now I look at my 14month old blessing and my heart wants for him to have a sibling. I feel like I can't express the grief I feel that giving him a sibling will be difficult, mentally, physically and financially. Part of me feels scared to go through it all again but I know it'll be worth it. I also have ADHD and LOVE growing my own food. So many similarities to your channel, thank you for making me feel like I'm part of something, akin to people I've never met but relate to so much. ❤️
I still feel that desire for reliving the magic of childhood with a little one and my youngest is 15. Have you guys thought about doing foster care? We have four boys ages 21, 19, 17 and 15. We have enjoyed every age and stage. We are so busy with our teens and adult sons that I often say I can not believe we had/have four sons! 😍 Also, it seems to get more expensive as they get older. You guys will truly enjoy every age and stage. Parenthood is such a gift!
Alex you make me cry, really wish you could have loads and loads of babies around you, you both so deserve it, you have so much love to give
My husband and I are childless...it used to annoy me that u do have a family but still talk about loss but I stuck with your posts and I think you are amazing...no one speaks with the reality of grief like you do...the rawness of your emotion is just how infertility is...I can u derstand how you are still grieving thank you so very much
Cassidy is so precious....she just melted my heart this video
You only get today, you only get this moment. You only get right now. Enjoy this baby girl now, today.
Keep your unsolicited advice to yourself, Karen. If you actually watched their videos then you’d see they do enjoy her.
Your story comes right out of my hearth. I also was alone with my story of infertility more than 30 years ago. Now ouer 3 kids adults( 33, 25 and 21 years old) and the are amazing. Ivf doesn't exist in Austria 30 years ago, so we adopted and became fosterfamily. We adopedet ouer 25 y old girl 3 years ago 😊. I wished I had someone like you in my live. It's so good to hear your story and I think you are a blessing for many families. Greetings hugs and prayers your way. Gabriele from Tirol Austria🇦🇹 sorry my English isn't the best😅
Hmmm... I'd say I have a few hobbies. Choir, singing and music, cooking and baking, hosting at our home, working on our marriage, my puppy dog and learning a new language. I would truly love to live on a homestead one day.
I have a hobby. I‘m sewing. It helps a lot, but there are times, when grief is to big, when I even can‘t go to my sewing room. We lost one of our sons, when he was 23. But I stay positive and still can see the beauty around me. But sometimes I don‘t have enough mental strongness to concentrate on what I‘m doing. I follow you since Callie came to your life and I admire you so much. Thank you for always encouraging us ❤️
I started watching you back when you first started IVF. Fast forward 9 years, I am struggling with infertility and have had our only two embryos, fail. I do photography on the side and attempting sourdough and it’s been a great hobby to focus my time on and I enjoy it 💛
They all grow up, but we all hang onto those memories. Now we have been graced with our two lovely grandaughters, which they two are now grown to lovely teens. Now just hopeful we will live long enough to meet future great grands. With Gods will.
My hobbies are crafting, painting Reborn dolls, and just started raising Muscovy ducks. These ducks are awesome! They're not the same as other duck breeds. They get very big. The "hens" can lay up to 60 eggs per year(each hen). Their eggs make baked foods more awesome. They have a natural habit of going into a coop at dusk on their own. Some people eat these ducks because they're very lean and get very big. We're raising ours for the eggs. They're really fun to watch.
Thank you for sharing your videos. The girls are all precious!
I'm a birthmother to my first born. I commented on your lastest video where you're oldest daughter got to visit her birthmom. I was able to visit my son this past memorial day for the first time in 32 yrs. We all had a great time and look fwd to meeting again. God bless you all.
A hobby of mine that helped me cope through our daughters loss was working outside; growing gardens, planting flowers, watching “life” happen.
What a beautiful family! Struggled with unexplained infertility for years. But was blessed beyond words! I have been following you guys for years. Your story is beautifully wholesome. Thank you for sharing ❤️
Not currently in the TTC phase of life, but I think this resonates to any “waiting” season. For me it is waiting for one day being ready to start a family and meet my person. Any season of waiting is so difficult
I've been watching you for years . My granddaughter is only a few days older than Cassidy and I used Cassidy as my marker for where my granddaughter should have been developmentally. My suspicion was confirmed my granddaughter is Autistic. . Your faith in our Lord gives me peace knowing we we all be watched over and given our strength to handle what we have been dealt in life. You are an inspiration to more people than you realize . God Bless
Alex y’all are blessed with 3 beautiful girls who are so so kind and considerate of each other. You have a beautiful life. I lost a baby and I find comfort knowing I’ll see my baby in heaven. Thank God every night for the family you have as some never get the chance. Much love to you all!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I used to knit but had to stop as i have osteoarthritis in my wrist. So i started making greeting cards which really took of in covid. I was making cards for people who could go to the shops. There's only one person who actually gives me money even though i don't want to take her money. It's helped my mental health more than when i was knitting. I love how Cassidy has grown and never stops talking. Lovely vlog. xx
My hobbies are gardening and caring for houseplants. Both make me feel closer to the earth and to the loved ones I’ve lost ❤️
I’m not going through infertility, I’m also 50, but my heart aches for you sweetie when all you want is for God to give you a family the natural way.🙏🏼 listening to your stories about this just gives me one more person to pray for.🙏🏼 so my hope for you is that prayer be answered.🙏🏼🥰 You should also listen to the song 🎶 let them be little 🎶 it’s by Amanda Faith!! It reminds me of my one and only daughter when she was little.🥰 I absolutely love this song!!! Please let us know if you listen to it in your next video!👍🙏🏼
I started watching you about 7 years ago... I love what you've created in your homestead.
I lost 24 miscarriages then had a ivf transfer which resulted in my miricale baby boy who was born at 33+5 3lb3oz he's now 4 months old and I know that I want to try one more transfer with our 2 embryos left I feel guilty sometimes thinking about another transfer when I've been so blessed but I'm not ready to quit just yet. I'm 45 years old ❤
I followed your journey from the moment you had your first two girls and was very invested in your open heartfelt way to share. Never did I think I will go through a similar situation. I will have to decide if I gonna be happy with „just“ being an auntie or if I have the energy of going through the process of treatment.
Having followed you over the years has kind of left me not completely unprepared and I am very glad for that. I am still scared of the health risks, for me and the child..so I will take my time deciding with my partner. But age(37yo.) is pushing for a rather fast decision.
But I have my hobbies and passion and ideas for our/my live without kids and yes still I have aswell a bucket list for all the things I‘d like to show my children.
Usually it’s not weighing so heavy on me, but thinking about it in moments like this is saddening and at the same time it feels like a process of letting go.
Finances would probably cut our possibilities to try to one time, that’s a lot of hope and pressure put, mostly on my body and mental state.
Aswell I can see a lot of reasons to be happy, even without kids. It is a confusing time for me. The pressure to have to decide now,makes me feel a bit stubborn and want to do my life my way… is anyone experiencing something similar? I had no doubts at all from 21yo. till 35yo. that I want children as fast as possible and now that I have a partner with the same family wish, we have health troubles and time pressure… it’s quite ironic.
If anyone read this till the and I am really happy to hear your thoughts.
I guess the confusion is palpable (:
Lots of love to everyone
Oh my gosh! The girls are growing at a rapid rate! Been a hot minute since I have been on your channel and I am amazed but you all! So much love and admiration from Canada 🇨🇦 ❤
Cassidy is getting so big each and everyday!! I understand its said that she is getting so big and won't be so little but still keeping you guys in my prayers!
So beautiful, Thank you Alex. I am 61, I lost my Dad in January, now being forced to sell our home at an unbelievable loss, due to trusting people in the legal field (in the form of a "non-profit" legal group) who said they would help us (we paid them) and they did the opposite and my older sibling will not do his job as executor of my Father's Living Trust. He will not let me see it no matter what. I roughly know what I am supposed to get, but he is holding tight to actually keeping everything!!! We are in deep financial need right now!! It is truly about survival at this point. My older child is fighting me on suing him. I am between a few rocks and a few hard places. Thank you Alex for the love for all of us who are grieving many losses.
I feel that way about my granddaughters. My first granddaughter will be 9 years old soon. Gosh, I remember mourning her babyhood when she turned one. I literally envisioned what she would be like at this age and it hurt. Her sister just turned two and is just so precious, every little thing she does and says is magic. Yet I know she too will grow up and there'll be no more babies as my daughter had her tubes tied (she has PCOS and Graves Disease). The ache of wanting to cuddle a grandchild in your arms is real. As a grandmother a grandbaby allows you to do it all over again but with more time and love to give.
Yes I am fortunate to have had a child of my own and blessed with two healthy grandchildren, and yet the circle of life goes on, ticking on by when I really wish babies would stay babies forever.
I've had secondary infertility, which was very distracting and now that I'm in my mid 40's I have moved on and grateful for my kids that I have. I love gardening. I've had more success with flowers than with fruits and vegetables, but it is a continual learning process. I wouldn't call it a passion, but definitely a hobby. I also love to cook and bake, which is a necessity. Lol!
I was approved and supported by my insurance to get in vitro. But the specialist didn’t think I would improve his numbers so he made up infections I didn’t have and he didn’t treat but refused to do in vitro on me. So my hubby gave up and would not back me. But god took him from me when he was almost 56. And I’m still here, happy. I used to have dogs, but they died on me. So I have grown my new family, 5 boys and 3 girls, feathered and funny parrots. Chances are they will outlive this soon to be 68 year old.
I live to garden, I tat, knit, bead, male parrot toys, do cricut, bake, meditate and get hugs and kisses from my parrots and snuggles from my 15 year old cat. Life is good because, even though I had to put it on my credit card, I have new tires on my lawn tractor. Yippee!
As a woman in my mid 50s I have been through many traumas and feel grief still but healing as well . God's been very good to me ,with giving me a sweet calm modest life. My joy is my walk with God, my 2 dogs . I find new hobbies at different times. I'm constantly healing . Thankyou for sharing you sweet journey I've quietly been watching you for Many years and enjoy all of you grow . Love and prayers for you from me ❤
Alex, you know I understand after watching my daughter struggle . Can't wait for new baby girl coming in October. Love you guys
Gets distracted, while explaining the distraction of ADHD.
So relatable.
God bless 🤲
Wow, I don't know what to say other than thank you for this video. I've been following you for 8 years now. You opened my heart up to adoption and learned how to live the life I want to. ❤
I'm so glad. It’s changed our lives for the better.
My hobbies include gardening, baking bread, and dreaming of a homestead! Much inspired by you guys!
Working out. After our second failed transfer trying for our second child I could truly feel my mental health slipping. Having our son needing me present really changed everything. I couldn’t just sit in bed and fall apart. He needed me. My dad had bought me an Apple Watch for my birthday and a friend told me about the fitness tracker on it. So I decided to get back to gym. I didn’t have any expectations. I honestly thought I might stick with it for a few weeks. Well it’s been a year now. I have gone a minimum of 5 days a week since that first day. The change in my body is great but I can’t begin to tell you how my mindset and depression has improved. I’m a completely different person. Eating good food and moving your body are true medicine. Now I go because I love it. I feel strong. And I think that’s something that infertility robbed me of. We are still on our infertility journey and I wish I could say we’ve finally had success. Unfortunately not, BUT I can honestly say I’m handling the journey better than I ever have. So for that alone I’m grateful.
My youngest is 25 and I still grieve the children we did not have. After 3 difficult but blessed adoptions I would have loved more but my husband was over the system. My hobby is penpalling with lovely ladies all over the world.
I saw a remedy for flies around farm animals. It was posts placed in the ground with fly paper wrapped around them. The farmer was thrilled at how well it worked to reduce the number of the bothersome flies around livestock. 😮. Also you can place the paper anywhere you can imagine. The easier the better. 🥰
Hi Alex, thank you for your kindness and care! I am early into my journey with fertility issues but I am longing for children (more than one - preferably 3 if God allows). My husband and I have prayed and prayed, we feel that we know the names of two of the children and have faith that we will meet them one day. I have one little girl that we lost through miscarriage who I know is with Jesus now. We have had lots of grief, loss and sadness over the last two years but we still have hope! I resonate with what you are saying about having hobbies that bring joy, I have been feeling a desire for this too. I have started to try and learn about gardening and recently had our first rose bloom - wow! Your comments have encouraged me to pursue this and find joy in the simple things in life. Blessings on you and all your family x
I just love to here Cassidy talk. I love watching your garden grow each year. ❤
Horses, riding in the mountains and Show jumping was my saving grace under my ttc journey. I now have 2 little ones, one is special needs so my horse days Are over for now ❤️
After 8 years of IF, I had triplets with multiple attempts of IVF. My triplets graduated from high school this past month. Will be starting a new chapter as an empty nester. Your encouragement on finding a hobby can be beneficial in many different stages of life. I am sad that my children I have enjoyed so much are growing up, but I am learning to be happy for myself that after being a stay at home mom for 18 years, that I can dream new dreams and try new hobbies and grow in a new direction too. A cow is probably not in our future, but definitely growing veggies and some puppies!
Alex, someone said your family will grow with son in laws, grandchildren. And it will also grow with your girls friends. You can welcome so many friends to your beautiful homestead and invite them to be a part of your family through friendships.
Thanks for the inspiring words you always offer!
Mine was houseplants through secondary infertility. I had over 30, and something about growing things helped so much.
This was so good. It's been a while since watching. But I definitely needed this. Going on 15 years next March and still have never been pregnant. I recently kinda lost myself and forgot the things that made me happy..and watching this was a special reminder to me. I love singing but have not done as much lately. Anyway, thank you for the video. God bless you all❤
Good point Philip.. we ALL have some kind of quirk that makes us unique.. so who am I to judge anyone.. I have a hard enough time trying to manage myself, much less worry about how someone else is living their life. Ya'll do you boos. Glad to see a vlog.. The girls are growing so fast. Peace, love, acceptance and understanding from Texas. PS: To add just a bit.. struggled with infertility for about 10 years when I was younger. We were married very young and I lost a baby at 17 (delivered at 25 weeks, he lived for only 8 hours back in 1976).. fast forward to age 25 when I was able to conceive with the help of Clomid.. it was my third cycle and after that one my physician was going to start more infertility workup. A miracle occurred and I became pregnant with twins who were born early like their brother but with the help of a McDonald cerclage (a thick suture put in the cervix to help it stay closed for women with incompetent cervix which is why I delivered my first pregnancy early) I was able to carry them to 31 weeks. We had a couple of months in the ICU and we brought our twins home.. they will be turning 38 in September and we are so blessed! I had a miscarriage when they were around 3 and after that started having issues with fibroids, etc. so I ended up having to have a hysterectomy when I was 38. That was rough because I really wanted to try for another child, so I am very familiar with infertility and loss and of course we were so very blessed to have our daughters but still at age 63, I grieve for what could have been.. not daily and not to excess but I still wish that things had turned out a bit different but we don't know what plan God has for us. For those who are in the thick of it, I feel your pain and wish you the best outcome! For some of you, your miracle will happen but for some, it will not and, again, God has different plans, although sometimes it seems that God can be cruel. I don't pretend to know any more than that. I just wish you all the best. Take care of yourselves!
Big hug Alex ❤ i have learned to love gardening as well my 5 children have now grown up and mourn them around and being there mom on a daily basis . I had to learn to find myself I am still working on hobby’s I love my 4 dogs and painting furniture baking and cooking . My mouth dropped at seeing all of that cream in your milk bucket 😊❤
I think it is important for everyone to have a hobby. My husband was forced to retire for health reasons. He liked to play golf, but wasn’t able to. He had no hobby. I lost him October 9, 2020. I miss him all the time. He needed a hobby.💖 My homestead is .43 acres in a suburban neighborhood.
Aaw Alex, so heartwarming to hear about your passion for gardening. We gave up on our TTC journey this spring, after almost ten years and three early miscarriages.
My hobby has been photography for many years now. And since I’m a longtime hobby-astronomer I started with astrophotography four years ago. It really helped me coping with our infertility…
I don’t have any issues having babies, I watch you for your happy, peaceful, positivity, and to be a cheerleader for you. I may not know you but I think you and your family are lovely. You deserve all of what you pray for. I don’t have a hobby to give, but keeping your heart and mind busy can help through a lot of different things. So I hope for all who feel low in their hard times find the love and happiness you all deserve as well.. ☺️♥️
I love you guys so much. Not to sounds like a total weirdo as you obviously don’t know me, but God put your channel in front of me before i started (late 2017) TTC and we ended up battling infertility due to PCOS for 2.5 years. I have a beautiful toddler now who is 2 years old after a medicated cycle. We were so fortunate that it worked so quickly and so minimally invasive in comparison so what others deal with. Letrozole, ovadrell (spelling-an injection to ovulate in case that helps anyone) and follicle monitoring + Provera. You two and your beautiful family have been such a light in my life and i can’t tell you how much God has used you to teach me many lessons. I was so consumed with TTC and the longing in my heart to be a mom during the empty arms phase that my “hobbies” were also really centered around family building. I’ll share some things that i love and like to do now, but also want to encourage women to try different things that seem interesting. Today it seems like we have to become super stars at something so enjoy it (and turn it into a side hustle), when we can really take simple pleasure in things without the pressures. I enjoy painting and drawing, but haven’t been very consistent. I took up embroidery and that was a very affordable and fun project! Not too hard to pick up either!! I enjoy baking, and really want to get into baking bread. Houseplants are another love of mine that i actually did develop while TTC now that i think about it. It really helped with some of my desire to nurture. I did start a YT channel for therapeutic purposes that served it’s purpose during that season (haven’t posted the last few years so not a plug haha) and that can be a hobby without the pressures of views and money making. Editing and filming can be creative!! Thrifting can be a fun hobby. You can resell vintage items or make old things new for enjoyment. There are lots of options out there and maybe you’ll take enjoyment in trying new things versus diving deep into one! Definitely follow through on Alex’s advice though. So so good. Thank you for sharing your wisdom Alex!
Just wanted to say I miss you guys. I watch videos everyday. I feel y’all are my family too. I would love someday to meet you guys. Hope all is good and good health. Praying for you and the family. The girls are getting so big. Time really flies fast. I’m all gray now lol. Love to all of you. ♥️♥️♥️
Oh Alex, thank you for this. I feel like you are speaking directly to me. We are in the beginning and it’s so hard. Our first appointment with our infertility doctor is in August. It is a heavy weight on my chest. I’m not excited but at the same times I am and so hopeful for answers. I needed to hear your message so thank you for sharing. I actually have been watching for around 6 years. I didn’t realize back then that I would need your videos one day to give me hope.
Hi Alex and Phil, greetings from Belize. Thanks for sharing this video. Guess what I am finally starting a hobby I'm obsessed with as last year infertility became officially scary as I lost my womb to cancer. This year I lost my job and decided to stay home and be a pilot's housewife hoping to someday adopt and become a stay at home mom. My new hobby is sewing throw pillows, aprons, curtains etc so I have a pile of Christmas diy gifts I'm making. But you're right find a hobby as we wait for God for our adoption story. 😊 hugs from Belize.
Also love how beautiful your girls are and how wonderfully happy you all seem to be with your homestead life. Hugs always from Belize 🇧🇿.
It’s lovely Cassidy Drew is so cute and she can chat so well and she is so pleasant
My passions are singing, hill walking and birdwatching. All helped when I was struggling with infertility and continue to help my mental health. Feel so lucky to have two miracle IVF babies, now wonderful young adults
I struggled with infertility for ten years . Then god blessed me with my daughter who is studying abroad in Florence at the moment. She has been my everything! My miracle from above ❤️
My infertility journey happened through lots of prayers .. my oldest daughter is 40 and my youngest is 19 .. 4 girls and 4 boys .. God is in the miracle business!! 🙏🙌
Cassidy is so darn cute and so talkative also well spoken. Sending y’all lots of hugs .
So happy to see you guys are back. Finding joy in life is so important as is GOD
The girls are beautiful. Callie’s eyes are incredible. Cassidy can really chat away. Alex I don’t know how you milk that cow. I couldn’t or I should say wouldn’t do it. The kids are so blessed.
I admire how you put things into a different perspective, truly why dwell on grieving when there lots of things out there you can do, besides you already blessed with 3 beautiful kids and wonderful husband to grow with. Let us supposed be happy with what God has given us and stick to His promise that He will grant us what our heart desires in His time if we just pray for it. our life alone is already His best gift which we'll always be grateful for, so just we'll be happy with everything that we do and be productive. Hugs fr PH😘🥰😍❤
Please pull your head out of your back end and actually listen to someone else for once. You clearly don’t get it.
Purposeful and meaningful activity is at the heart of good mental health. You’re right it could be absolutely any hobby and so important.
This family is so very loved!! Thanks for openly sharing your very personal journey ❤
I'm a whole month late.. but here anyways! I personally have not struggled with infertility, but I know a bit about grief in some forms. I have depression and anxiety, and while I'm lucky enough to not have experienced loss, I've found my depression to mimic grief on its own without much of a reason behind it. Hobbies are my lifeline. I've been passionate about creating for years! I draw and paint, journal, write, quilt, crochet.. when my depression hits, I lose interest in the one I'm focused on and then I spark interest in another and work through them in waves. It's soooo helpful for me to have multiple methods of creativity, multiple outlets for my brain to get excited over and focus on. I fully believe God gave me my depression as my personal cross to bear, and know he wouldn't ever give me more than I can handle. Everyone's journey is different, but hobbies can absolutely be a lifeline when your mind is heavy with stress and worry and grief.
Wow … the girls are growing and changing so much. Used to see them so regularly that it wasn’t so obvious but now you are posting infrequently the changes seem drastic
Oh my goodness-Cassidy’s talking-amazing. She is adorable
Callie and kenzie are getting so grown up so fast and perfect big sisters to Cassidy
Kinsley **
When ever I watch Cassidy speak she just brings so much joy and hope. To see this beautiful, precious life that was made by warriors that didn’t give me. Sometime I just need to be reminded to just keep going. That feeling of no doubt, that feel of hope! Thank you. Truly.
Xxxx
Haven’t found my hobby yet, but praying for the will to search and find it. It’s something I have always struggled with and have increasingly delay with these last 8 months of trying to conceive. Thank you for this encouragement. I love your heart.❤️
Amen Phil my daughter has ADHD she is 33 and she has taught me so much along the way so I have learned so much to always support and help in any way she needs. My husband also has ADHD. Blessings to you both. My daughter has PCOS and had a very difficult time getting pregnant she took metformin and integrated medicine with an amazing doctor she was blessed with son who is almost 3,but her best friend and other couples who have been struggling with infertility for awhile. My daughter also has a hobby which has made a difference. Blessings sweetheart ❤
I was married and had two beautiful boys, then went through a divorce. I would have loved more children, but not with this man. Then 3 years ago, I married again to the most amazing man and he has never been a father. We wanted to desperately have a child. I'm older than him and we tried naturally, it didn't work, then we had an IUI and at 9 weeks, we lost our twins. Our last IUI had to be canceled because they said there were too many eggs. I was devastated as I was hoping for success. As I get older, I see the dream slipping away. We will try one more round of IUI and then we are done. Watching your story brings me peace and also strength. You both have an amazing family but I totally understand the need for more children. Praying for you ❤
I have truly missed you guys... so glad to see you!
I’m looking at infertility from the other side now. My children are adults and starting their own families. Our bio son has a daughter who is my sweet little granddaughter. It’s so wonderful to be a Grandmother. Our adopted daughter is a hard worker who is still looking for her life partner. My hobby after knowing we wouldn’t be able to have any more children is scrapbooking. It’s very heart warming to put fun memories together in an album. It put focus back on what blessings I have rather than what I don’t have. The infertility years were so hard but what came out of it was so many blessings I can’t even count how many. ❤
My hobby is equine therapy. To own a horse. But, along with the 25 year wait to have a child, I had to wait until I was 51 before I could get my horse.
I have a passion for homesteading, but our home isn’t ours, so, we have limitations on what we can do.
We lost 3 babies in 2020, and then moved to Tn. Still holding onto hope. Some friends tell me to let my dreams go and let God plan them. But the hard part is being in the waiting room of my own life, wondering if the reason for the wait is I made a mistake.
My husband and I are hoping and praying for a child through the miracle of Adoption! I started an Etsy shop back in 2018 that I love creating for and it gives me purpose in the wait.
My hobby is knitting for special care baby unit and baby loss this started when I was in a dark place of loss however I had hope and strength my two boys now have children and to this day I still knit so that other parents have something pretty in dark or stressful times I love yours and Phil’s open approach in your Chanel xxxx
Bless you Cassidy,you are such a precious,sweet,darling girl,your conversation with us was so special 🙏💗
I have a few hobbies. I crochet, knit, garden, go to the beach, try and find new hiking trails to explore and cooking. It all helps give me something else to focus on other than empty arms, but I think it also helps enrich my life in otherwise also. 😊
Taking pictures of nature and taking day trips and seeing things you never saw. I make mini scrapbooks some of my day trips
My hobby is gardening, I do raised beds and I'm so excited everything is blooming and starting to set fruit! I also love taking care of house plants, I don't have any great windows to put them in so I've made an indoor greenhouse out of an old glass cabinet with some cheap growlights and it works great! Great idea for anyone in an apartment without any great window light.
Oh i have missed you guys...I know what you mean when you say there's no more babies when you think about cassidy getting bigger. I hope you get to have more no matter how you choose to do it.... but believe me when I say yhat feeling will be there when your babies become adults as well. I wish I could have had more, but it didn't happen for me. Your girls are beautiful and amazing. You and Phil are amazing parents and I love watching you all. I do hope your dreams come true and you get to grow your family more. Know your fans love you all very much.
Im 67 and still grieve infertility. I ❤ my 2 children who came to me via adoption. I have a green thumb and garden a bunch, but depression is a major thing in my life.