In February 2020, my husband and I found out we were expecting what we thought was baby number 3. We are military family and had just move to HI. We were uncertain on how we truly felt about the possibility of having a baby during an uncertain time but we decided to face it on. We’ve done it twice before with our 3 and 1 year old. Then we found out we were having twins! While Twins sounds like an amazing blessing to many, I felt overwhelmed and uncertain since we were 3000 miles from any friends or family members... Fast forward 9 months later I had my boys. Experienced traumatic experience 1 week postpartum with eclampsia and nearly lost my life. Which brings me back to this video. I experience intrusive thoughts... not about the well being of my baby but rather thoughts of not being there for my children, death! Was always on my mind. I would feel a sudden tightness in my throat and chest, heart racing and complete loss of control of my ability to control my thoughts. My boys are 9 months now and although am not 100% , I find this to be true- that a little bit of self care ( home gardening and evening runs) has helped me get to this point. Thanks for talking about this very important topic and thanks for allowing me to tell my story. If you are going through this, it gets better!
I didn't know this was PPA. Once I was home alone with the baby and the baby will not take his daytime nap. I was recovering from csection with no help from anyone and I just cried. Cried like a helpless cry. He is now 3 months and he still doesn't sleep in the daytime. But I now learned to deal with it. I also have trouble sleeping at night ( hence why I'm typing this at 3am!) I know I am not alone in this. First video on TH-cam on PP that I can actually relate to.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience! I cant even imagine having to be alone after a c-section with no help. You are one strong mama! On the toughest days, I tried to remind myself that it was only a phase, and that I can conquer one day at a time. You are DEFINITELY never alone. I am sending you lots of love and patience to make it through the hard days. I appreciate your kind words! Xx
This was so on point ! Grateful for This video this morning , helps to not feel so alone when struggling with all these things. The hardest part as you said is the mental health piece , or more so balancing my mental health while trying to be the best mom I can be to my daughter! Which is hard to do when you feel depleted . Thanks so much your amazing ❤
I wish there was a way to prepare moms for this...a lot of us don't talk about as we should so we can help each other....after i been talkin about it...i found out how many moms have or had this and they gave me tips and it made me feel better that i was not alone in this.....thanq for this video..💚🙌
I had such a good massage once I went from having a panic attack before the appointment to being so comfortable I had no thoughts. I was only in the present. I highly recommend a good massage.
It’s 1:19 am and I am praying and crying over my kids. I feel so drained from the worry. It comes up in my dreams . I can see my babies blue and cold . The same dream over and over . I’m so tired .
Loved this video. Thank you so much for sharing! I struggled with PPD and PPA for the first year. Pretty much most things were unexpected. Healing physically, the difficulty of breastfeeding, the insane lack of sleep. I was caught off guard and it took a long time for me to find balance. My first child is 2 now and I just had my second, so I'm trying to find that balance again.
Thank you for sharing this! Your strength and courage to raise another child inspires me! ;) You look so beautiful in your maternity picture by the way. You've got this mama! Lots of love and light to you! Xx
My daughter is one years old and I have crippling anxiety. Still check on her every 30 mins while sleeping. Sometimes I can’t even check her because I’m scared something is wrong and make my husband. He’s starting to get annoyed but I can’t help it.
I'm currently in the throws of PPD and ppa. I haven't reached out to family or friends in years but the last 2 days I've been trying to connect with ppl. I feel incredibly lonely and my thoughts scare me. My baby has been fighting sleep for the past couple of weeks and I just started taking Wellbutrin, which initially exacerbates anxiety. I have a lifelong history of manic depression and ptsd. My mental health has isolated me from everyone except the ppl in my home, my husband and my 15 year old daughter. My baby just started stirring so I gotta go...
you are not alone in this, I was struggling with almost the same .. what kept me going is knowing that its normal to feel this way and thoughts don't have power over me, whenever I had one of these wired thoughts I just laugh at it and keep my self busy doing anything that makes me feel grounded .. also yoga helped a lot
@@salhilali87 thank u so much. I've gotten to a better place with my thoughts and I'm also bonding with my little one. Honestly I still have rough days but I can see light now. I'm wishing you tons of strength and peace. Also I'm heading back to the gym very soon. Thank u for this bit of comfort.
Thank you for sharing! You're beautiful inside and out! It really helps to know other people are experiencing these things too. The thing that surprises me the most about being a mom is how fast he grows even though sometimes days/nights can seem long sometimes. Now I miss the newborn phase.
Hi Michelle! You are so very kind! Thank you so much for your sweet words. I totally agree with you, strength in numbers! Oh my goodness, it feels like a daily shock seeing how quickly they develop and how fast the time flies, even on the long days ;) I totally feel you! Xx
Thank you for this video. It helped me to gain perspective about how intensely challenging this new experience is as a mother, and how important it is to self love and self care to keep strong.
The sleep part is the biggest problem I’m still struggling with 13 months later. My baby still wakes up at least twice through the night to nurse and she can’t sleep unless she’s under me and I keep trying to break her out of it but it’s not working at all. I just want to sleep through the night.
I'm a ftm 6days postpartum, the anxiety is crippling... I cannot cope. I can't eat, or sleep and I just want to be myself again, I just cry all the time. I wish someone warned me
Good video I meditate every day and almost every night. While pregnant I used to put on a guided meditation videos to help me relax. Now I will find the time to go to the hair salon and get a haircut and new hairstyle.... I am donating my hair to children with cancer and I want to have this new change with motherhood to start with my look... This will create a visual change in my mind that will coordinate with the change my body went through... it's like a way for me to put both in the same page.
I *love* this, Monica!! Seems like you have a healthy self care regimen, and it is super inspiring. I strive to meditate daily (twice a day would be incredible). How beautiful that you are helping little ones in the process of your transformation, too! Thank you for sharing this. I'm sure you will inspire other mamas with this message as well! Xx
My daughter didn't sleep either and the Phantom cries drove me nuts once she began to nap regularly. I already have generalized anxiety my whole life so I was used to noticing when I was behaving anxiously and my husband was great at pointing it out and helping. Thanks for this.
Oh man! Those phantom cries are so brutal! Such a blessing to have a supportive husband to help us through. I can't tell you how healing it has been to hear from moms like you, who are also sharing some of their stories. So thank YOU for not only watching, but taking the time to leave a comment. It is empowering to know we don't travel these paths alone, and that there are amazing, supportive women ready and willing to help lift one another up! Xx
I thought you naturally just know what to do but as soon as I got to my room with the baby I felt lonely and scared. I am so glad you speak about this. It just started for me when my lil turned 18 months. I have no idea why now and how to handle it. But it makes sense. Sleep deprived, she still nurses alot. Any tips on weaning of quick? Or getting them to sleep in their bed in the same room? Also do you still have anxiety or did self care help you out of it?
Thank you for sharing your experience! Us mamas have more in common than we think. Sleep deprivation is no joke! I'm definitely no expert on getting little ones to wean from bottle/breast or sleep training. I lucked out and Kai just gave it up relatively easily. Depending on how often they are still nursing, I would suggest extending the amount of times between feeds and/or replacing those times with actual meals if possible. Thankfully, the anxiety resolved with a combination of more sleep and regular exercise. So important to take that time for ourselves, but when you are in survival mode it is often the last thing you are thinking about. You are definitely not alone mama, and I hope we can foster a community of mamas that can share amazing tips and resources with one another to help us be our best selves. Xx
omg so my daughter is 9 months now and shes still not sleeping completely through the night... I thought I was alone thank you for this. YES I have these same issues...
You are definitely not alone, mama! Make sure you take some time for YOU! It is so easy to forget to do that when in survival mode, but it makes such a huge difference! Cannot overstate that! Lots of love! Xx
I love your content! And totally heard you when you described PPA, every word made echo in me. But what a deception to hear your unique advice : “do something for you for 15 minutes a day”. What if you can’t because baby isn’t really ever falling asleep and you have no external support? I would have loved real advices on how to carry on, how to still get some rest when you cannot sleep because your anxiety causes insomnia, etc…
I struggled with generalized anxiety all my life, but it always came in episodes and was manageable. Things took a turn upon getting pregnant. 3 years later after unsuccessful attempts to treat it with plant extracts it's getting worse and worse, and considering CBD oil or something more serious. It's a daily fight. I literally have nothing to be miserable about, yet somehow I can't feel happy at all. Constantly agitated.
Do you care to share if your doctors gave you medicine to help the PPA? I feel that this is never talked about. It seems like your journey is very similar to what I am going through. Thanks!
You created this video three years ago fast fwd to today you don’t understand how much I needed this and my oldest is going to be five (it gets easier just new worries I suppose) lol well Ty for this dear ❤️🙏🏼
Oh dear, It is hard. I thought I was stressed because I was sleep deprived and that was the reason I freak out thinking that I will ended up rolling the stairs and put a sling and counting out loud the stairs going up or down and having nightmares that were so Real that I have to check
Tyetisha Burroughs that is something I think about often...the mamas who are doing it alone, and how much more support and credit you all deserve. It is a major inspiration for my videos on self care. I’m sending you lots of love, mama. This community is here for you always 💜💜💜
Kids OT Help thank you it’s not easy being a single mom but i rely on god and chocolate to get me through each day my daughter is only 6 months old I pray it gets easier the older she gets thank you for your videos you have great advice and tips that have helped me parent better so thank you
Tyetisha Burroughs chocolate fixes most things! 😂😘 I promise it gets easier. It doesn’t mean there aren’t challenges in each phase, but the beginning can be especially rough.. Hang in there mama! You’re doing a wonderful job. Thank you so much for your kind words. It means a lot 💜 Big hugs! Xx
I don't understand why you didn't allow them to cry it out. if you fed, changed, and held them and there are no issues, then just let them cry. I think that's why it took a year for your son to behave... because you weren't teaching him any discipline. a 1 year old crying all the time is ridiculous. You've lost me as a viewer.
Girl he’s a baby he’s barely been on this earth for a year you can’t “punish” a little baby. You have serious problems. Not everyone wants to leave there child in a dark room to scream there heads off most normal people wouldn’t do that unless they needed to take a min to themselves
In February 2020, my husband and I found out we were expecting what we thought was baby number 3. We are military family and had just move to HI. We were uncertain on how we truly felt about the possibility of having a baby during an uncertain time but we decided to face it on. We’ve done it twice before with our 3 and 1 year old.
Then we found out we were having twins! While Twins sounds like an amazing blessing to many, I felt overwhelmed and uncertain since we were 3000 miles from any friends or family members...
Fast forward 9 months later I had my boys.
Experienced traumatic experience 1 week postpartum with eclampsia and nearly lost my life.
Which brings me back to this video.
I experience intrusive thoughts... not about the well being of my baby but rather thoughts of not being there for my children, death! Was always on my mind.
I would feel a sudden tightness in my throat and chest, heart racing and complete loss of control of my ability to control my thoughts.
My boys are 9 months now and although am not 100% , I find this to be true- that a little bit of self care ( home gardening and evening runs) has helped me get to this point. Thanks for talking about this very important topic and thanks for allowing me to tell my story. If you are going through this, it gets better!
I am going through the same here. I hope as days goes by, so this illness....😁🤞🏻
Me currently! I questioned rather it was PPA due to my intrusive thoughts being about me and not my son!! Praying for healing. I’m 6 months pp.
I didn't know this was PPA. Once I was home alone with the baby and the baby will not take his daytime nap. I was recovering from csection with no help from anyone and I just cried. Cried like a helpless cry. He is now 3 months and he still doesn't sleep in the daytime. But I now learned to deal with it. I also have trouble sleeping at night ( hence why I'm typing this at 3am!) I know I am not alone in this. First video on TH-cam on PP that I can actually relate to.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience! I cant even imagine having to be alone after a c-section with no help. You are one strong mama! On the toughest days, I tried to remind myself that it was only a phase, and that I can conquer one day at a time. You are DEFINITELY never alone. I am sending you lots of love and patience to make it through the hard days. I appreciate your kind words! Xx
The part were breastfeeding isnt easy. And yes isolation and loneliness!! So true.
I totally agree! Such a big misconception that breastfeeding is easy. I'm with you mama! :)
Eva Garcia same for me.
how many feeling there tight elastic band around chest and rib cage,, lump in throat feeling
This was so on point ! Grateful for
This video this morning , helps to not feel so alone when struggling with all these things. The hardest part as you said is the mental health piece , or more so balancing my mental health while trying to be the best mom I can be to my daughter! Which is hard to do when you feel depleted . Thanks so much your amazing ❤
Sending you so much love! 🤍
I wish there was a way to prepare moms for this...a lot of us don't talk about as we should so we can help each other....after i been talkin about it...i found out how many moms have or had this and they gave me tips and it made me feel better that i was not alone in this.....thanq for this video..💚🙌
I had such a good massage once I went from having a panic attack before the appointment to being so comfortable I had no thoughts. I was only in the present. I highly recommend a good massage.
Good tip! Thank you!
It’s 1:19 am and I am praying and crying over my kids. I feel so drained from the worry. It comes up in my dreams . I can see my babies blue and cold . The same dream over and over . I’m so tired .
Same !! I will have bad dreams about my baby on a stick burning alive !! Over and over I will cry because it was the wrist feeling
Keep going guys. Not much help but I'm sure you're doing a great job. My wife is struggling. Thanks for being honest 👍👍👍
I understand how you feel. I think of worst case scenarios at least once a day. I didn't expect this when becoming a new mom.
having my child outisde of my belly in this strange world. Also being a mom of a black son in America
Yess!! Oh my goodness, I feel ya on those my friend. 💜
Loved this video. Thank you so much for sharing! I struggled with PPD and PPA for the first year. Pretty much most things were unexpected. Healing physically, the difficulty of breastfeeding, the insane lack of sleep. I was caught off guard and it took a long time for me to find balance. My first child is 2 now and I just had my second, so I'm trying to find that balance again.
Thank you for sharing this! Your strength and courage to raise another child inspires me! ;) You look so beautiful in your maternity picture by the way. You've got this mama! Lots of love and light to you! Xx
@@nekoleamber thank you!! ♥️♥️♥️ Same to you!
My daughter is one years old and I have crippling anxiety. Still check on her every 30 mins while sleeping. Sometimes I can’t even check her because I’m scared something is wrong and make my husband. He’s starting to get annoyed but I can’t help it.
I'm currently in the throws of PPD and ppa. I haven't reached out to family or friends in years but the last 2 days I've been trying to connect with ppl. I feel incredibly lonely and my thoughts scare me. My baby has been fighting sleep for the past couple of weeks and I just started taking Wellbutrin, which initially exacerbates anxiety. I have a lifelong history of manic depression and ptsd. My mental health has isolated me from everyone except the ppl in my home, my husband and my 15 year old daughter. My baby just started stirring so I gotta go...
you are not alone in this, I was struggling with almost the same .. what kept me going is knowing that its normal to feel this way and thoughts don't have power over me, whenever I had one of these wired thoughts I just laugh at it and keep my self busy doing anything that makes me feel grounded .. also yoga helped a lot
@@salhilali87 thank u so much. I've gotten to a better place with my thoughts and I'm also bonding with my little one. Honestly I still have rough days but I can see light now. I'm wishing you tons of strength and peace. Also I'm heading back to the gym very soon. Thank u for this bit of comfort.
Thank you for sharing! You're beautiful inside and out! It really helps to know other people are experiencing these things too. The thing that surprises me the most about being a mom is how fast he grows even though sometimes days/nights can seem long sometimes. Now I miss the newborn phase.
Hi Michelle! You are so very kind! Thank you so much for your sweet words. I totally agree with you, strength in numbers! Oh my goodness, it feels like a daily shock seeing how quickly they develop and how fast the time flies, even on the long days ;) I totally feel you! Xx
Thank you for this video. It helped me to gain perspective about how intensely challenging this new experience is as a mother, and how important it is to self love and self care to keep strong.
Yess! I love this, Olivia! It is a lifelong journey, but we can take one step at a time. Xx
I agree how lonely and isolating motherhood can be. Also not having much time for yourself in the beginning.
Thank you for this ❤ Self care has been on the back burner; stay at home mom of 3. (3 year old , 1year old , & newborn )
This is literally me now. Exact same ages.
The sleep part is the biggest problem I’m still struggling with 13 months later. My baby still wakes up at least twice through the night to nurse and she can’t sleep unless she’s under me and I keep trying to break her out of it but it’s not working at all. I just want to sleep through the night.
I'm a ftm 6days postpartum, the anxiety is crippling... I cannot cope. I can't eat, or sleep and I just want to be myself again, I just cry all the time. I wish someone warned me
Good video
I meditate every day and almost every night. While pregnant I used to put on a guided meditation videos to help me relax. Now I will find the time to go to the hair salon and get a haircut and new hairstyle.... I am donating my hair to children with cancer and I want to have this new change with motherhood to start with my look...
This will create a visual change in my mind that will coordinate with the change my body went through... it's like a way for me to put both in the same page.
I *love* this, Monica!! Seems like you have a healthy self care regimen, and it is super inspiring. I strive to meditate daily (twice a day would be incredible). How beautiful that you are helping little ones in the process of your transformation, too! Thank you for sharing this. I'm sure you will inspire other mamas with this message as well! Xx
@@nekoleamber thank you I am glad to help.
I’m gonna commit to taking a bath and doing a better job with taking care of myself
Tyetisha Burroughs love this! 💜
My daughter didn't sleep either and the Phantom cries drove me nuts once she began to nap regularly. I already have generalized anxiety my whole life so I was used to noticing when I was behaving anxiously and my husband was great at pointing it out and helping. Thanks for this.
Oh man! Those phantom cries are so brutal! Such a blessing to have a supportive husband to help us through. I can't tell you how healing it has been to hear from moms like you, who are also sharing some of their stories. So thank YOU for not only watching, but taking the time to leave a comment. It is empowering to know we don't travel these paths alone, and that there are amazing, supportive women ready and willing to help lift one another up! Xx
I thought you naturally just know what to do but as soon as I got to my room with the baby I felt lonely and scared. I am so glad you speak about this. It just started for me when my lil turned 18 months. I have no idea why now and how to handle it. But it makes sense. Sleep deprived, she still nurses alot. Any tips on weaning of quick? Or getting them to sleep in their bed in the same room? Also do you still have anxiety or did self care help you out of it?
Thank you for sharing your experience! Us mamas have more in common than we think. Sleep deprivation is no joke! I'm definitely no expert on getting little ones to wean from bottle/breast or sleep training. I lucked out and Kai just gave it up relatively easily. Depending on how often they are still nursing, I would suggest extending the amount of times between feeds and/or replacing those times with actual meals if possible. Thankfully, the anxiety resolved with a combination of more sleep and regular exercise. So important to take that time for ourselves, but when you are in survival mode it is often the last thing you are thinking about. You are definitely not alone mama, and I hope we can foster a community of mamas that can share amazing tips and resources with one another to help us be our best selves. Xx
Also why is this not something doctors or other moms talk about?
Right!?! It still baffles me.
Is sooo annnoying
Girl you look so gorgeous. I love hearing you speak. New subscriber!!
How long have you dealt with anxiety? Share more about your experience and symptoms.
omg so my daughter is 9 months now and shes still not sleeping completely through the night... I thought I was alone thank you for this. YES I have these same issues...
You are definitely not alone, mama! Make sure you take some time for YOU! It is so easy to forget to do that when in survival mode, but it makes such a huge difference! Cannot overstate that! Lots of love! Xx
how many feeling there tight elastic band around chest and rib cage,, lump in throat feeling
Balance & calm.
Seriously im suffering its hard
I love your content! And totally heard you when you described PPA, every word made echo in me. But what a deception to hear your unique advice : “do something for you for 15 minutes a day”. What if you can’t because baby isn’t really ever falling asleep and you have no external support?
I would have loved real advices on how to carry on, how to still get some rest when you cannot sleep because your anxiety causes insomnia, etc…
I struggled with generalized anxiety all my life, but it always came in episodes and was manageable. Things took a turn upon getting pregnant. 3 years later after unsuccessful attempts to treat it with plant extracts it's getting worse and worse, and considering CBD oil or something more serious. It's a daily fight. I literally have nothing to be miserable about, yet somehow I can't feel happy at all. Constantly agitated.
Your hair is gorgeous btw.
Do you care to share if your doctors gave you medicine to help the PPA? I feel that this is never talked about. It seems like your journey is very similar to what I am going through. Thanks!
It’s nice to know I wasn’t the only one I am close to giving birth to my second and I am so scared of going through this again the second time around
I'm a week away to having my second and I'm so worried to suffer thru this again. How are you doing so far?
Looking after myself
Trying to juggle 2 kids under 3 while also taking care of the house. When there is 4 other adults who dont really help.
Thank you so much for making this video
The loneliness I felt when my baby is awake at night. That is the most surprising.
You created this video three years ago fast fwd to today you don’t understand how much I needed this and my oldest is going to be five (it gets easier just new worries I suppose) lol well Ty for this dear ❤️🙏🏼
Sending you SO much love!! Xx
Omg everything you explained , I am going through while also having to care for an 4 year old
Thank you for this video ❤
Oh dear,
It is hard. I thought I was stressed because I was sleep deprived and that was the reason I freak out thinking that I will ended up rolling the stairs and put a sling and counting out loud the stairs going up or down and having nightmares that were so Real that I have to check
That PPD is a real and scary thing. It’s such a taboo topic though!
Mental health ... whewwww I have panic attacks daily but I want to get better so badly
Mikea Dyer i can only imagine how tough that must be to navigate. Do you have access to a support system or therapist?
Most surprising part? Definitely this anxiety and it's obtrusive thoughts.
Yes!!!! Love this.
Very informative video 💕
Agree, I have lucid dreams that aren't pleasant and worrying if my baby is getting enough milk. I think I have ppa
Sending you love, mama!
I used to love stand up comedies & they always cheered me up. Now nothing does. Idk what to do anymore
Thank you, this was helpful ❤
LOVE THIS!
Im 5 days out from birth and im drowning
Trying to figure it all out alone has been the most difficult part
Tyetisha Burroughs that is something I think about often...the mamas who are doing it alone, and how much more support and credit you all deserve. It is a major inspiration for my videos on self care. I’m sending you lots of love, mama. This community is here for you always 💜💜💜
Kids OT Help thank you it’s not easy being a single mom but i rely on god and chocolate to get me through each day my daughter is only 6 months old I pray it gets easier the older she gets thank you for your videos you have great advice and tips that have helped me parent better so thank you
Tyetisha Burroughs chocolate fixes most things! 😂😘 I promise it gets easier. It doesn’t mean there aren’t challenges in each phase, but the beginning can be especially rough..
Hang in there mama! You’re doing a wonderful job. Thank you so much for your kind words. It means a lot 💜
Big hugs! Xx
Kids OT Help no problem and thank you have an awesome rest of your night
This is exactly what I have and have never heard of it. Now I've developed panic attacks everytime I have to drive on the highway
The same as ur reasons it hard
Is waking up with shortness of breath and chest tightness a sign of PPA???
I think so i get the same thing
Getting ice cream 🍦 and sitting in the park
The hardest part was to deal with your emotions after birth
how many feeling there tight elastic band around chest and rib cage,, lump in throat feeling
This is me right now. Plz how did u mange it.. cus I cannot sleep 💤. Plz help me out.
Intrusive thoughts
I don't understand why you didn't allow them to cry it out. if you fed, changed, and held them and there are no issues, then just let them cry. I think that's why it took a year for your son to behave... because you weren't teaching him any discipline. a 1 year old crying all the time is ridiculous. You've lost me as a viewer.
Girl he’s a baby he’s barely been on this earth for a year you can’t “punish” a little baby. You have serious problems. Not everyone wants to leave there child in a dark room to scream there heads off most normal people wouldn’t do that unless they needed to take a min to themselves
Thank you for this! ❤