I am learning to try and see things from my mother's feelings and not mine. The hurtful accusations are so horrible, but I do see that she can't help it. I had to move my mother in with me and she was really happy about that. She couldn't live alone anymore and was lonely since my Dad passed away 2 years ago. My aunt & cousin came to take her to lunch one day last month trying to take advantage of her by wanting her personal items from her home. They have never helped in her care and always told me no when I ask for help in the past. They convinced her I had taken all of her items because they wanted her things from her home. It was pure hell getting my mother back to understanding the arrangements her & I made after their interference and trying to convince her I was a thief. I blocked them from my life and am keeping them away from my mother so they can't take advantage of her and try and turn her against me for their own personal greed. My mother doesn't remember now what they did so things have calmed down. She doesn't even remember what they did. I have been trying to see things from her world. She doesn't realize she has Dementia, so I have to be careful with my words. My heart breaks for her. I try and keep her spirits up and do things she has always loved to do. It's hard most days with my breast cancer recovery Cancer free now, I'm still tired a lot and depressed from losing my Dad, & my brother last year, my sister this year, and learning to help my mother and take care of her while I try and take care of myself. She doesn't qualify for help because she makes too much money and not enough money for out of pocket care. Plus what little she does qualify for she refuses. I love my mother with all my heart and I'm trying to understand what she's going through and keep her happy. Thank you for your videos. They help more than you know.
I agree with dustraction but the reply to them, you have to keep it short and sweet because they dont comprehend long conversations or explainations I know this because I'm dealing with my dad and every day is a new adventure for both of us
For sure these strategies won’t work for everyone or work all the time. Feel free to share what works for you in the comments. It might help someone else who is caring for a loved one with dementia.
Unfortunately my mom once she is fixated on something missing she is stuck on locating it until we do. It’s the one thing that isn’t affected by her short term memory loss. I’m at a complete loss with how to get her to move past it.
Yes, I understand, this is quite common and challenging. And for sure not every strategy will work every time. Every person with dementia is different and every day is different even for the same person. I will post a follow up video with a few more ideas for those very challenging situations. In the mean time, stay strong and positive. All my best!
What helped me was getting air tags. I attached them to a few important items that she was constantly misplacing or hiding. I attached them to her billfold, purse, tv remote and the bag that had her pills. Then I could find them easily using my smart phone. It saved me hours of searching every day.
Ty❤
So glad you found the video helpful. Thanks for watching and commenting!
@@dementiacarehub ty
I am learning to try and see things from my mother's feelings and not mine. The hurtful accusations are so horrible, but I do see that she can't help it.
I had to move my mother in with me and she was really happy about that. She couldn't live alone anymore and was lonely since my Dad passed away 2 years ago. My aunt & cousin came to take her to lunch one day last month trying to take advantage of her by wanting her personal items from her home. They have never helped in her care and always told me no when I ask for help in the past. They convinced her I had taken all of her items because they wanted her things from her home.
It was pure hell getting my mother back to understanding the arrangements her & I made after their interference and trying to convince her I was a thief. I blocked them from my life and am keeping them away from my mother so they can't take advantage of her and try and turn her against me for their own personal greed.
My mother doesn't remember now what they did so things have calmed down. She doesn't even remember what they did. I have been trying to see things from her world.
She doesn't realize she has Dementia, so I have to be careful with my words. My heart breaks for her. I try and keep her spirits up and do things she has always loved to do. It's hard most days with my breast cancer recovery Cancer free now, I'm still tired a lot and depressed from losing my Dad, & my brother last year, my sister this year, and learning to help my mother and take care of her while I try and take care of myself. She doesn't qualify for help because she makes too much money and not enough money for out of pocket care. Plus what little she does qualify for she refuses. I love my mother with all my heart and I'm trying to understand what she's going through and keep her happy.
Thank you for your videos. They help more than you know.
Thanks so much for sharing your story. Stay strong and take good care of yourself. Wishing you and your mom many blessings!
I agree with dustraction but the reply to them, you have to keep it short and sweet because they dont comprehend long conversations or explainations
I know this because I'm dealing with my dad and every day is a new adventure for both of us
Agree with short and sweet! Great advice. Thanks for taking the time to comment!
My mom would say I'm treating her like a child and get even more angry if I told her that.
For sure these strategies won’t work for everyone or work all the time. Feel free to share what works for you in the comments. It might help someone else who is caring for a loved one with dementia.
Unfortunately my mom once she is fixated on something missing she is stuck on locating it until we do. It’s the one thing that isn’t affected by her short term memory loss. I’m at a complete loss with how to get her to move past it.
Yes, I understand, this is quite common and challenging. And for sure not every strategy will work every time. Every person with dementia is different and every day is different even for the same person. I will post a follow up video with a few more ideas for those very challenging situations. In the mean time, stay strong and positive. All my best!
What helped me was getting air tags. I attached them to a few important items that she was constantly misplacing or hiding. I attached them to her billfold, purse, tv remote and the bag that had her pills. Then I could find them easily using my smart phone. It saved me hours of searching every day.