I’m glad I found your channel. I didn’t think there was anyone similar of my school of thought out there. Very refreshing and hopeful that I found you. If you would be down to collab at some point please get @ me.
Interracial unions create confused offspring. There's enough confusion to last us a while. Black men date outside due to self-hate. Black women have racial loyalty and date out by default. Plus we out-number yall, so we are more justified to date out.
I felt this one all in my spirit. I hate how you are in the minority though. I have come to accept that as a black woman, I am not only hated by non-blacks, but black men as well.
I can honestly say that I was never aware that black men bashed black women this badly until recently. Of course I’ve always known about the way rappers disrespect women, but it never occurred to me that those lyrics were so damaging to y’all. I guess it was easy to overlook because we always see women turnin up to the very music that degrades them. It’s like we’ve been programmed to ignore venom as long as it has a nice beat to it. I woke up to that when my daughter was born. It’s hard to ride down the road with your daughter in the back seat and sing along to a song saying bit***s ain’t sh*t. That’s why I’m going so hard on this topic. Men have to do our part to reverse or at least try to see if we can heal the pain we caused. That’s how I sincerely feel. I just hope it’s not too late. I want my daughter to have a chance to have a loving husband one day.
You’re the only man I’ve come across on TH-cam that has taken an objective stance on this topic. It’s sad to see so much division in our community. The blame game is old and childish.
I fell down the "manosphere" rabbit hole a few months ago since lockdown and let me tell you it all makes sense now! As a BW from the UK I disagree that this is not a conscious decision being made by BM particularly over here where statistics show that BM marry IR more than they actually marry into the community. This backs up what I see when I go outside my front door. I'm sorry but the only way us BW will create any type of family is to leave and go outside the community also, otherwise the numbers/ratio to BM just don't add up. We can no longer just "wait and see what happens" like we've been doing. This is the reality.
Right. What's even more funny is that the dudes telling women to change and submit aren't even dating. They're not on any woman's radar. Further, the ones leading the pack aren't dating black women in the first place--based on looks. A woman can't make a man date out. Sorry. That's a decision created by society long long ago. Ever since blacks were allowed to marry, they chose to marry *light and bright;* and now it's popularized by athletes and rappers to marry *white.* It has zero to do with black women, and everything to do with the status quo. Black men use whites to work their way up the social ladder. It's a status symbol. *Black must women marry out for their own good.* Another thing, they won't tell you is that marriage is common. Anyone can get married, rich or poor, 3rd world or 1st world, ugly or attractive. What isn't common is having a life for yourself, earning a living, and having freedom. I've watched families live on less that 5 bucks a day all over the world. And black folk in the Western world are worried about who submits to whom, and who's attractive. No wonder we're at the bottom.
@@aubreyjames8795 Thank you Aubrey! And this isn't to discourage anyone but the UK has more mixed/bi-racial children at primary/kindergarten age than ever and the majority make up of their parentage is BM ! The genders just aren't getting along and BW are now accepting that it is the way it is. There are too many of us single and 30+ BW daydreaming about some monoracial society! You know I've come across a BM channel recently referring to us as "daggles" which is basically some entity to be "bred out." BW cannot do anymore, for decades we've been begging for attention, we tried to better ourselves through education but apparently that's not enough and makes us come across as facetious or better than. BW are attacked for weaves, general appearance, morals and attitude which is the whole totality of what makes up a person! Would still love to meet a marriage minded, normal, working BM, but yeah, for the majority of us it's time to go.
@@fi734 No prob! I'm 100% with you on everything except that "we tried to better ourselves through education." No, education was a duty unto ourselves for our own future because in *reality* no one is going to pay your bills. We were lucky enough that our parents told us to go to school instead of working in retail for the rest of our lives. The truth is that we tried to better ourselves through hair weaves, and nose contouring, and the reality is that there's not enough makeup to turn a black person white. The fact is that we tried to degrade ourselves to be accepted, and that wasn't enough. So this is actually why we have to leave. That path is the way to hell. Why change yourself for a man at the bottom of the international social ladder? Why better yourself, and change your looks for a man that refuses to build a family? Black men can blame the women, but the proof is in the pudding. White women get the same black men that the black women get. Iggy Azalea is a great example. Kylie Jenner is a great example. Khloe Kardashian is a great example. The men have no accountability. Daggles? Black men will be bred out as well if they keep having mixed babies. That's just logical. Not that they'd care, since they have a deep case of self hate anyway. What type of man needs a white chaperone to navigate through society? 😬*Some black man said, 'with a white wife, you get better loans at the bank'??* You mean a black man cant figure out how to look presentable and walk into the bank as a man, and convince the bankers that he's worthy of a loan. You can command respect with your own presence? Must have something to do with sagging pants. Black women are only attacked because black men who aren't dating are angry at black women for having better careers, and and not choosing them. Black men are attacking black women because we're easy targets. Why? You have to ask yourself why you were on those manosphere channels in the first place. Those channels play on desperation. You said, we can't be single in our 30s? Uhm, since when is being single in your 30s a pressing matter? Half of the women complaining don't understand the fundamentals. You can't get married in a society build on dating. You can't find quality in a society that doesn't value you. That's why you go to a different country, and put yourself out there. Get on a dating app, go to a bar, go to meetups. If you want to date, you date. If you want marriage, you don't date, you find a marriage market. This is why Candace Owens didn't date her husband. They were ready to marry after a month. Engagement for two years and living together before marriage is BS: Unless the goal is a lived-in BF.
Yes, BW should keep moving. But...... notice how in order to have a successful relationship with a man of any other nationality, BW basically have to become totally different ppl. BW aren't the loud, unpleasant, disrespectful, and masculine problems with those men as they are with BM. You can justify it however you like, say you're allowed to rest in your femininity or whatever nonsensical bs you come up with. But, just know, if you understand you had to change who you are to be successful, you also understand at some level, you were the problem.
@@user-nm8sf2sy7q but BW do change who you are in order to IRD. It's usually easy to sniff you out because the vast majority of you take on this specific way of speaking - the valley girl, your white girl voice. It's ok. Go. Be happy. Just know that when you start throwing stones from over the fence, we see you. BTW, it's not a stereotype that BW are loud and stuff. It is a culturally verifiable characteristic. By comparison to women of other races, BW are louder, more vibrant, and possess greater life when in the moment. That is what attracts white girls to BW. They want to be you. They don't have that spark that BW have that make them just better. From a distance, BW are having the time of their lives; particularly when their in a group. So don't try to pass it off as a stereotype. I know better.
@@Blakkfoot Cut the BS! You make it sound forced that BW act differently. Please, it’s not that they act differently it’s that they are finally allowed to be their selves instead of dealing with struggle love with BM. That femininity has always been there but when BW have to always pull the chain to do most of the work in a relationship with a BM then what do you expect?
Most of us black women are no longer interested in black men. I have met too black men with the man-child syndrome and wounded-childhood issues. I am not interested fixing the walking dead (internally).
@ MFS, I hear you sir but, you are terribly misguided. Black women have always been and will continue to be the Universal Gold Standard. Many want to be us, yet don't have the capacity to withstand the storms that come with it. You sir merely want someone who will put up with your B.S. and not challenge you. Hey, to each his own.
There's a sacred text that says, "There are only two emotions, love and fear." What looks and feels like hate is really fear. At one of my book signings, an intelligent, distinguished black man said to me, "Black men have to forgive black women for surviving." I believe there are many reasons most black men refuse to take responsibility for their part in the sad predicament of our relationships, families, and communities but here's just one: they mistakenly believe to say they failed at one or two things means they ARE a failure. It's that all or nothing thinking. I don't know how much I appreciate you. Men like you give me hope for my grown daughter, that she might just meet a responsible, intelligent, black man with integrity capable of love and marriage.
So, if we have to "forgive" black women for surviving what do black women have to"forgive" black men for? Have we not been surviving as well? Theres plenty of shit I've been through and I'm sure other black males have been through and we don't get no passes, even if we are not the minority of guys passing you around like hotcakes and making children, even though we are not the ones with a criminal background or cheating, we still get told by these females that we need to Check other grown adult males, we need to protect a group of females who aren't even checking for us, we are told to provide for a community that is okay with saying they don't need us. Make it make sense, you push people away and then ask for allies and say we don't have anybody because. I have yet to see one black female in Shumake's or Derrick Jaxn's comment section say, you know what? When are WE as females going to get it together? Why are we so preoccupied telling men how to govern other men when we just want to be able to go around and make a mess and then be forgiven. Why is it so gosh darn hard to tell another black female to straighten the fuck up! You can't because you got black women who will shame you and call you a pick me, who will tell you to stay on code for bad behavior.
@@LukaDonesnitch Because statistically in society black women (generally) have it more together. Black women are not perfect but they definitely support their family, their men and their community.
@@filmadcamp1512 They do not have it more together, this is based on an individual opinion of yours. They are not supporting the community or black men a large swath of black women support themselves and the gynocracy.
It has gotten so bad I have no interest whatsoever in dating at all. Indeed, we need to come together on it. Having these talks are instrumental cause I’m not going to rest until it changes. I’m tired of it too. Appreciate you talking on it candidly.
@@CookieH14 Be not discouraged though. We have to have hope and work. As long as we are teaching “get better” things can begin to turn around as we do that.
My Daddy always said if "your woman is out of order" its cause "The man is out of order" once the MAN get his act together the woman will have no choice but to fall in order! Point,blank and petiodt!
When I was younger I adored black men. But I quickly learned they abhorred my kinky hair and dark skin. I can’t change those things, nor do I want to, so I looked elsewhere. Being ignored and undervalued by black men honestly is the reason why I started dating interracially. Men of other races treat me better than my own. I don’t experience half of the problems with other men that I did with brothers. Sad to say. I think it’s because brothas think I owe them something for simply giving me any attention. They automatically assume I’m thirsty just because I look a certain way. They don’t work hard enough to attract or keep my attention. Whereas, other men will work harder to impress me. Other men will bring their A game, because most women of all races require that-not just sistas. The “high quality” men who approach me are usually men of other races. I’m exotic and attractive to these men- with my dark skinned and kinky Afro (and actually, they prefer my hair to be natural. It doesn’t matter if it’s short or long as long as it’s me). Why should I make a fool of myself chasing after Brothas that prefer redbones or “lighter skinned” women with silky straight long hair when I can be with a man who thinks I’m a goddess because I’ve embraced my kinky locks and thick shape? Most brothas I know are with women who are lighter than them so the preference has long been clear. I simply got the message and some self-respect with it. That’s all. I don’t hate brothas at all. I just don’t fall into their category of preferences so I moved on. Interracial dating is not easy-let’s be honest. Bias still exists. But I don’t even look at brothas anymore romantically. I just don’t have the interest anymore. I’d rather be happy single than miserable coupled with a man who doesn’t really want me.
@@joewatts8018 yeah, clearly that’s true. I’m not mad at it. I’ve just filed the stop work order, accepted it and moved on. That by no means suggests that if the right man came along and he happened to be black I would reject him, but I’m no longer interested in going above and beyond to appeal to black men -or any man really -that are not interested in my brand of beauty. To him I’m not beautiful, but to another I’m a goddess. It’s as simple as that. I think many women might be better off to do the same. It’s been my experience that many black men hold black women by a much higher standard than other women. That’s just my personal experience-clearly not everyone has experienced that, but I’ve seen that. And generally I think all parties should absolutely bring their A game. But if you do and you’re still running into these problems and you feel forced to make choices that will do harm to you emotionally or physically just to appeal to specific men or women , it might be better to move on because all it establishes is that this is not about you, it’s about pander to their preferences. Pandering and desperation doesn’t look good on anyone. If his wants are not in line with yours, move on to a man who will look at you favorably. I just don’t look to black men first anymore because the men I would be open to dating typically are not interested. I would love to say it’s because I’m not feminine, sexy, fit, intelligent, confident, spiritual, successful or attractive enough, but that’s not the case. They just want something else and I just have more success elsewhere.
honestly im shocked that some of these black men hate black woman the way they do ,because all of my life all i ever saw was black woman helping , marrying even if the guy has no money. continue staying with cheating husbands and husbands that abused them. so exactly which ones they hate?
All of them. After one bw rejects them, they spiral.Don't forget the ones doing the most like working, going to school and raising their kids while the man is in & out of jail because of child support for his other kid(s).
@@joewatts8018 that's another pathetic excuse. I see black men and boys on TH-cam Twitter and tiktok saying that black women are ugly ratchet and that no man wants to be with them but yet they sit here praise white women by putting them on the pedestal while bashing us. That's sign of self hatred! Now I'm okay with interracial dating as long as you don't tear the other person down.
My goodness Willie Lynch really did a number on our community and it has span decades. And passed down generation after generation. Where has this hate come from? We have to go back and look at history in order to see how it’s affecting us today. Our community is messed up. How do WE collectively fix this? It’s not just for BW to fix and it’s not just for BM to fix. We need to come together as a team and fix this issue. Our society is broken. It seems that globally we as black people look for reasons to separate ourselves from each other just like the way Willie Lynch intended it to be. Other communities see the hate that exists between us and they laugh at us. It’s so sad to see because I can only imagine how amazing we would be if we can even have a respect for one another let alone if we started to love each other. The media doesn’t want blacks to get along which is why certain images are pushed and black people buy into it. We need to wake up! Because our community is dying off slowly.
I tell people this all the time! They manipulated our psyche to the point that we hate each other! It’s really deeper than the surface! It goes back to the breaking down the black family dynamic! I always ask people to educate themselves about themselves especially black people! We need it the most because we’ve been lied to so much! I love black men and black women! I love and appreciate my people! But we have to give the same love and compassion to each other that we so freely give to others because of the feeling that as black people that we have to minimize each other in order to feel worthy in someone’s eyes who is unworthy of us as a people! Let’s hold each other accountable while not forgetting to hold ourselves accountable in the process! We have to heal and it’s going to take having those painful conversations! Healing, Love, and Peace!
@@queenedroe9811 I’ve decided to stop watching content where black people bash each other, and instead look at content for how we fix this collectively. We marched together in BLM globally but now things have gone back to how they were, if not worse. It’s almost like it didn’t mean anything. A lot of people in our community talk about dating out like that’s going to solve our issue. Black is beautiful and I can’t imagine being anywhere else. I’m not saying people shouldn’t date out because that their choice, but they need to stop bashing one another when they do and black people seem to be the only race that does that.
I agree but I would like to add to what you've said. Actually the beginning doesn't begin with the beginning of slavery; it begins with the fall in the garden of eden for mankind. satan hates/ hated Gods creation and deceived eve. If you really desire our problems to be dealt with you must go back to the beginning and seek to understand why the human race is is in a fallen state, how we got there, and how to get out. Try to understand why you are always cursing, where it comes from, how you got there and why you can't stop. You're tired???? We are tired too.
The movie Claudine , was the perfect example of the breakdown of Black families. They purposely removed the Blackmen out of the household. If you haven't seen it check it out. It stars, James Earl Jones and Diana Carroll. Wonderful soundtrack by Glady Night and the Pimps. Go check it out if you never seen it. One of my favorite movies.
They dont wanna do that bro.. they want to just keep blaming BM for everything, when we do things to uplift our community they dont even appreciate it, or its not good enough.. Black men have done fucked up shit but its a problem that is fueled by both BW and BM we need to come together
WHEN will MEN be accountable for contributing to broken homes, creating dysfunctional relationships, having kids with multiple women and start accepting there is cupability on their side as well. No one is solely the blame, but STOP bashing ALL women for the actions of a few. Women want good relationships, successful careers and family. There are LOTS of beautiful, phenomenal, successful, hardworking, supportive and extraordinary women. If you want a GOOD woman, you have to be a GOOD man.
Here's the biggest solution to this issue. The BM and BW who have no problem with addressing their internalized issues needs to address and fix those issues. Once all that's cleared up, we need to bring together all the resources we have, purchase about 10K acres of land and build our own. Like-minded BM and BW should only be apart of this process.
This is a temporary solution. Seek God and He will give you a permanent answer. Jesus said without me; ye can do nothing. Have you ever considered why in spite of our trying to fix things it doesn't work nor does it last? It's because we are all to blame...yes I said it.....we are all to blame and the devil piggybacks off of our refusal to repent, our refusal to submit, our refusal to honor God, and our ignorance. We're the only ones who don't know it. The Bible says my people are destroyed for a lack of knowledge. You can't give what you do not have. Go back to the beginning people, learn about God and He will teach you about yourself......but only if you seek Him earnestly. God is not your problem.....sin is.
@@angelahepburn1524 Out of respect for others, I choose not to touch on religion initially, but since religion has been brought to the table, I will respond accordingly. The Most High has ordered His people from the beginning to seperate from the other nations. To not seek treaties or marriages with these people. As everyone can clearly see, we have done the opposite which is why we are cursed with curses and scattered to the four winds to this day. To acknowledge that we are in fact these people, repent and come together is what the end of my comment is referencing. The Most High coming back and finding His people behaving accordingly in what you are referring to as a temporary solution will be the beginning of the permanent solution. Remember, we are in fact in a temporary situation.
@@thegoldenerahaslanded Sir, or Madam, I am not talking about religion. I'm talking about the plight of our people. I'm talking about what God has to say not what you or I believe. Remember God Alone is Sovereign and He alone is the Creator of all things. He has the last Word because He is the Word. Let us not use this time to give the adversary an opportunity to creep in and distort or misuse our plight. You have made some valid points and I agree and let's not inadvertently sweep aside each contribution based on the truth of the Word of God. We must be wise.
I am 24 years old and honestly, I not sure what to do about the brokenness in my community. I believe we do need to find a way to come together as a people.
Talk to your brothers, be the change that the younger generation can look up too, check your brothers behavior when you see them acting and talking like degenerates!
Exactly! That’s why the argument is going growing so much. Women have legitimate reasons for why they think the way they do and so do men. But I’m not seeing a lot of people talking about how to solve these issues. I’m seeing more and more that people think it’s best to leave black alone when you choose to find a mate. It’s sad.
@@TheShumakeWay Well bm divested years ago and you have seen the results of the situation right now. Now BW are choosing to divest from BM, now it's a state of emergency because it's affecting the BM. The BM didn't care that the BW was left struggling to provide and raise children alone. I have said for years, BW were tired of being disrespected,m and concerns pushed aside. BW have done the best they could to support and encourage even when it wasn't returned. It's bad enough BW are hated by so many and for the BM to hate BW is gut punching.
@@TheShumakeWay, the solution is quite simple. Work on yourself. When you want to change the world, you start with the person in the mirror. The thing is bw ARE working on ourselves. We're holding ourselves accountable, fixing our mistakes. We're seeking therapy. I've only seen a handful of men talk about going to therapy. Because of this, when bw come out on the other end with a brand new mind, there's no one to meet her there. The first person she looks for is the bm. He's still stuck on blaming her even AFTER she's fixed herself, not realizing that he himself is still broken. You can't date, marry or mate with someone that still has that mindset, otherwise, what was the point of you working on yourself? The bm's best option is to stick with the bw. However, bw's best option is to expand her dating pool. There's just not enough good bm to go around. You sir, are few, far and between. You're really a needle in a haystack and that's the sad truth.
@@bjmartin6684 no one wants to have that conversation. They began trying to divest 15-25 years before Loving vs Virginia. This was during the time when Emmitt Till was murdered. They just had to have a white woman even if it killed them 😳
@Info Tech Yes, you're right, some Black women have serious issues, but so do white girls, but Black men will take the ish THEY throw at them with no complaints! I'll never! forget hearing a little overweight Becky call her Black boyfriend the "N" because she was mad about something he couldn't handle inside the supermarket! When she saw me cut her a look, she changed her attitude quickly! I didn't cut her that look because she called her "significant other" the "N" word, no, I did it because I'm Black also, and if you'll call him that despicable name, you would call my brother, father or any other Black person that name if you were angry enough. Sometimes I think that Black men not only hate Black women but they hate themselves the most, and that's sad.
I hate to say this but it's the complete opposite. BW don't take accountability for anything, at least nothing that reflects badly on them. Not just in relationships but even with raising children. Think about it, whenever a black single mom raises a son and he grows up to be a professional athlete or entertainer she takes all credit but if that son grows up to be a felon then it's because "His daddy wasn't there." As much as BW say that they're the backbone of the black community they only want to take credit for all the good but for all the bad they blame it on BM.
@@mskfc1 Here you go repeating this tired old trope that has been disproven for decades. What you just said is some bullshit. 51% of black men are single and childless. 64% of black men are in the middle-class and according to the CDC black men make the most active fathers. Of that percentage of black males 85% are married to BLACK WOMAN. So black men haven't been running to non-black women, statistically speaking for the vast majority of us black women are our first choice. Everything I just said is a fact that you can check yourself with a simple Google search. Educate yourself next time before you keep spreading lies.
Divide and conquer. If you can be magnanimous enough to date people outside your race who have continuously persecuted you can show kindness to your own, and maybe even yourself.
First time u actually experienced hatred from bm for bw I was about 17. I befriended a ww at work and she took me to her house supposed to have been a quick stop then we were gonna go to wherever we were going (this was a good 15 years ago) well she warned me about her bf. The way she described him I thought he was a racist wm. I got in that house and it was a dark skinned bm. And the way he looked at me with so much hatred in his eyes. I couldn't understand it. How does someone have so much hatred for someone you never even met? And the way they were living the house looked like a trap house. Well he convinced her to not be friends with me. Thinking I as a bw would "taint her" as if I could have 🙄 Anyway I had never known anything like that before then. Since my studying the BC I have decided to drop my cape. The truth is scary where the bc is concerned. Absolutely frightening.
The marriage rate of Black women marrying outside of their race is ever increasing! The divorce rate is higher between black men and non Black women. Black women are THRIVING!
I guess 🤷🏽♂️ who cares? Im a black man and I dont value marriage at all. I dont need it. Dont want it. But out of curiosity I looked it up. Black women are most likely to get divorced, least married and most often single. Interracial marriage or black on black. Folks just cant deal with you guys for long periods 🤷🏽♂️
💯💯💯💯💯Right!!! I just clicked off a video (a black man in Colombia talking about how the women are the most beautiful... 👀🤔 have you even been all over the world?) and landed peacefully here...
It is so nice to a black man speak highly about the sister on youtube and keep it real and calling out people who hate on their own people keep up the good work
I understand that you did what you had to do. I don’t blame you sis. But unfortunately that’s the end goal to have us all divided. You can’t be expected to save the whole race and be single forever. Do you.
@@youcantberacisttowardswhit3917, im telling you she don't have no man of any race and it's funny how they lie, and say they have a white man when they really don't.. And they are not protected by them either.. She's probably some very unattractive dark skin over weight Blk woman those are the main ones talking about divest and she's probably a foreign Blk woman at that..
As a woman that was married long term and now divorced. We need to look at how to love and be honest with each other. We are flawed on both sides. I agree only families will heal our current issues. Alot of times immaturity and insecurities is what starts the negative behaviors. If both people are working on themselves that is a winning solution. Accountability, self awareness and working on you is the only steps forward.
New subbie. Love your content and am VERY proud of you. That said, I don't agree with your stance in this video though I believe you to be genuinely concerned about the future of BP. The fact is this "beef" is not a WE thing but a HE thing. Black dudes are SOLELY responsible for the shambles much of our community is in as well as the warfare between the genders. SOLELY responsible. If you want the warfare to stop, the discussion and change needs to be made within BLACK MEN. PERIODT. Black women have done waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more than our fair share in holding down the race FOR CENTURIES and WE IS TIRED! If y'all want Black people to continue together, you Black MEN will have to fight for it. Remember, NONE of you came to us to tell us how to hold it down or keep our head's or that we're appreciated. We did it because WE value our culture while most of you only value being men. Further, calling out the hypocrisy and selfishness of the average American Black guy is not bashing but TRUTH TELLING and it's loooooong overdue. No more excuses fellas. You want it? YOU fix it. We're going somewhere to rest.
I am a Black Woman in my 40s, who is divorced and my experiences have been a hard pill to swallow down to my ex-husband cheating with a White Woman. Many of our Kings look at us as high maintenance, when the truth is...we are High Value and require a man to acknowledge the crown.
@@joewatts8018 I have never once heard a black man ask a black woman to call him a king, NOT ONE SINGLE TIME. I have heard plenty of women call themselves and demand people refer to them as Queens, Princesses, Divas, Boss Bitches, A Prize, The Table, Goddesses, you name it. So, it's not the black man who's the problem a lot of these females are regular human beings, you're not a demi-god you eat, shit and sleep like the rest of us. You are not a person to be pedestalized and propped up on some soap box to be worshiped by a man. That is severe narcissistic behavior.
Bro I 100% agree with you on how stupid race war is. If everyone on both sides take responsibility, change their actions, and work on building with each other. Then the problems will lessen greatly. It's no point of pointing fingers because both bw and bm both have our faults. Just do better.
The finger pointing and constant fighting is so similar to the fighting between Conservatives and Liberals and it’s so exhausting and scary. I see bashing all day on both sides. My soul is tired and all of the decades of finger pointing have gotten us nowhere. When does it actually stop?
my degree is in psychology and it doesn't surprise me. In counseling men in prison, I have found that women are blamed for many society ills that face black men. This is by design and by stupidity of our men to not value our women. Society have taught us to hate ourselves and why would our men value black women when they feel its easier to go the opposite way. But in prison, a black man expects this black woman to hold him down thru all his mess and years he face in and out of prison. You keep speaking your truth and yes black women got work to do as well....
We as a ppl/collective should have addressed this yeeaars ago. Should have never let the black division get this far... I'm glad someone's speaking on it. 💖
Whatever Black female content creator you are talking about it is not her job to try to uplift Black males anymore, or try to give suggestions for ways they can change. This has been done time and time again. Black males have made their choices, and they didn't include being the men in the community.. Black women were left behind, abused, discarded over and over again. So were the children these men left behind. The time for talk is over. Black women are saving themselves first and have realized they will have to seek happiness outside of the community. We'll pray for ya'll 🙏
Same sis, look at these men on these channels arguing with women. If they don't care that we're moving on why be so hostile about it? All the "we don't care about you anyway, be gone" nonsense they carry on with. Sir, if you didn't care you would keep your mouths shut and carry on with your lives. Y'all sounding really bothered 🤭🥴
Sadly, the bm that I have real relationships with in cases where they started only dating/married ww didnt jus arrive at love. ALL of them when asked honestly have spoke of hurts from highschool with blk girls, upset with yur blk babymama, or bw req something of them (monogamy, work, etc). Hurt bm that need healing...meanwhile ALL bw get blamed for who he chose, someone not taking his crap or he wasnt noticed becuz he was a nerd, etc. As if bw havent gone thru these same things and worse with bm all the time. Mature/intelligent bm need help with this topic. Many have no clue about the reality of what bw face daily(as you just said), stay clueless if they dated/married bw, and really need to start talking to one another. This is not the bw fight, we did all we could. BM can figure it out or not. Thank goodness bw are figuring out their worth and striving for better...even when we are attacked. Keep your heads up ladies, you deserve better and we can get better!
What have y'all done? Besides being non empathetic to other peoples issues besides your own? There is only one way this war will stop and that is when Black women stop being womanist & feminist and actually listen to other people's issues that they have with them. Not demand that men deal with their control issues, and bad behavior and lack of accountability. When y'all start really caring about what happens with others and not just taking what they say and using it to shame them or manipulate them then others will be receptive of what you got to say. Until then expect more of the same thing.
I just wanted to express how I feel. I grew up in a two parent African household with my mom and father. I went to school with only white kids. The only group of people to make me feel bad about my skin is black men. I don't know if you saw the Rolling Stone cover when George Floyd died, but they put this dark skin woman on the cover. I was like, I'm a woman, I want a guy to push me back if a car is coming, but she looked like a man. And its like we are portrayed as masculine when literally I walk down the street, and when I see a guy looking at me because Im "exotic" I get scared.
I agree completely. 👏🏽👏🏽 It's like we need to call a truce or something. Everyone is so ready to point the finger and blame the other side... rather than taking time to figure out how to fix things & make them better for everyone.
That’s crap!! YOU disrespect US, not the other way around! We put you in that spot to tell the white man to ‘Kiss your *ss, NOT to kiss and do more with white women! You tried it!
When I was 24 years old, I just found out that there's a gender war between black men and women. I was stunned and a little shocked, because I was never exposed to black men hating on black women growing up. Most black men I grew up with don't gave a damn about how a black woman dresses, about her hair, her attitude, none of that BS. But now, it's getting to the point that it has to be addressed and how black men should stand up against hating black women. If a black man hates a black woman, that means he hates himself.
Can you please do a video on how some men have certain standards they expect from women but fail to adhere to these standards themselves. As a black woman myself, I feel that if a man is bringing to the table certain standards of his women such as telling him where she's going and time, address, etc., but they don't uphold these same respects for his woman. I feel like if he's bringing it to the table then that should be a set guideline he follows himself and shows that same respect for her in return.
You have me in literal tears. The hate from our own men is so sad. It's so hurtful to hear what these men say about black women. Total degradation, and I know exactly which part of TH-cam that you're speaking about. Please continue doing what you're doing. We need to come together and stop this.
Yeah, it’s just something we’ve got to process thru due to all the systemic efforts to destroy our community. Some are in a very dark place right now and unfortunately, due to childhood issues, many will remain there.
I'm a black men both sides need to stop praising other race of people and black women need to stop praising no good black men and praise black men who will treat y'all like a queen. The only way us black men will find love is black women because black women know our struggles and we know black women struggle and black couple is everything.
@Thais Hayes The BLM founders have said flat out they wish to dismantle the “nuclear family” (black mother, black father) & are an advocate for LGBT parenting lifestyle or and I quote. “Mother, PARENT and child(ren)
I agree with you. I wish that things had been different in my marriage. But, I have faith. I have two degrees, my FICO score is going up and I'm a teacher with two side hustles... SO, King I'm proud that I am preparing myself for the next phase of my life where I will have a good man that loves and respects himself so that he can love and respect me.
Before it was black men preferring light skin black women. Now it’s black not dealing with black women period. Seen this type of mentality since I was a child...
Preach young blood 💯 Always remember babies you are blessed, you are loved, and you are wanted and highly favored by your Heavenly Father! Be your best you and let love find you ♥️
I hate seeing it too I'm a black women love black men still...it breaks my heart to see this 💔 I think it's interesting we are the only race that seems to dislike one another...hmmm!
I love my black women and the statement he is making about black women.They are our beautiful black women who need support and love.We as black men need to be there for our black and spanish queens
Thank you for standing up for black women. Thank you letting our brothas know where they are missing the mark with us and calling them to accountability. Although I feel like black women can do better in some areas, black men need to understand that we have become strong or as they wanna say "hard" because a lot of us have been put in situations where we have had no choice but to be. As a single 40 year old, black professional female and mom of 3 sons, I will say that I desire nothing more than a strong black man to be submissive to. Does anyone ever think that we get tired of being strong too and just juggling the responsibilities of life? How we wish we had a loving black man to fall back on. But...our men along with so many other races degrade us, talk bad about us, make us feel so unwanted and unloved, all while we are dealing with raising the children they have left us with. I am so glad that I found your channel because it has restored my hope in finding a good black man and that there are still black men that value us. Thank you sir for this. Be blessed❤
@@Jayrebel225 who said I didn't have a ring? Even if I didn't, it doesn't take away the fact that black men need to do better by black women and their children. Shows your ignorance and that maybe you fall into the category of these type of men. Totally missing the point. SMH
@@1newwoman07 and who supports those legitimate good brothers who work and have the desire to create black families, settle down and be stand up men? Instead the brothers that are the opposite of whom I described tend to get less support from sisters. Just stating observations and I dont hate or dislike BW just calling it how I see it. If our community needs to have a conversation then lets have the conversation as this gets glossed over, again, and again, and again.
If your women are hard that means the man is soft 🤷 somebody gotta be the strong one in this world. It aint easy out here 🤦 you can't make anyone do anything. People don't change unless they want to. Change is up to the person not someone else
Whole I agree with the majority of what's said in this vid, the fact will always be "A woman can never change a man. He has to see his wrongs and change himself."
Too many thoughts and feelings have been suppressed too long and are bubbling to the surface. Therapy is therapy and part of therapy is getting things. Personally, because of my upbri nging and pro black tendencies I prefer a black woman. We are dawning a new age and old tendencies are becoming outdated and the new age is ushering in. Having friends and family that have dated outside, it has broadened my perspective. This internet is a golden oppurtunity to put many thi gs on the ta le as a collective. With this pandemic and many forced to change old paradigms, many perspectives are bei g shared. Many bm and bw are frustrated with situations and are looking for alternatives. From a scientific perspective, these are necessary actions. The trick to me is, what are the results that truly serve our collective interests.From a godly perspective there is a master plan. Evidently this is part of the master plan. The niche is how does this play into your individual destiny. Get in where you fit in. What unique qualities do you possess that uniquely qualify you at this day and time to contribute to the collective progressively. Whe. I say you, I'm referring to me and all tuning in.If you trust and believe in the master plan, what are you mastering in relation to new heaven new earth.Amn Amn
As young bw in the Community, I have seen a great deal of issues happening in the blk community. I’ve only been alive for 15 years and I have seen some horrible stuff happen in the blk community. My 9 year old cousin was raped at 9 and got pregnant by her mother’s boyfriend. Me, my other cousin, my sister, my step sister and I have all been raped by blk men. Then I go on the internet and see us blk men and women bashing each other. There playing the blame game of who has done the most stuff when that doesn’t matter. We’ve all been hurt it’s time we fix it. I see blk men punching the lights out of there sons. I see blk mothers and aunts criticizing their daughters and blaming them for being raped. We’re pushing each other down instead of building each other up. Don’t blame all blk men for the ones that mess up. And don’t blame all blk women for the ones that mess up either. Stop trying to blame each other for the issue happening in the community . I feel like more blk men need Counseling and teaching. And blk women need more uplifting. Help each other instead of playing blaming each other. No blaming, no reasoning, no argument just understanding. If you understand, and show that you understand, you can love, and situation will change. -For the community✊🏾
I'm not being ignorant just a genral question we've seen what BM dooo but what have BW did that has effected them it's not as obvious as what BM has done, stupid question but yeah!!!?
We need to uplift each other to get past this impass that seems to be driving us apart. A lot of the tension stems from Men's perception of what how they want their women represent them. They want you to be submissive, loyal, homemakers and sexually available at all times for their needs, and dependent on them. They seem to chastise women that are independent, successful, speaks their mind and fail to accept that they are often that way because they had to be strong and take care of themselves and educate themselves. Instead of embracing those as positives men often see that as attacks at their manhood. I feel that men want to keep us dependent and under their thumb and controllable, when we don't have our own they treat us any kind of way, use o!ur bodies, cheat and often abuse us because we don't have an option. But when other submit to that lifestyle we are seen as so combative and difficult. Real men appreciate all we as successful women bring to the table and celebrate us. What more should a man want than a woman that is truly there for love and respect or one that is only there to get all she can from him😢
Who the hell you fooling. You never was empathic nor sympathetic to the Black men's plight. Selfish by nature and almost all of you all think is about "me, me".
@@malachiy13 I can't speak to your generalizations. I will say that I don't recall ever "empathizing" or "sympathizing" with your plight. You do realize "apathy" denotes indifference, right ? Sadly, it wouldn't surprise me if you don't.🤦🏾♀️
Imagine talking about BM’s so-called “plight” when, by almost every objective metric, BW are doing far worse in life than BM are. 😂 You Struggle Weaves are hilariously delusional.
I hate seeing or hearing about black men bashing black women and vice verse(primarily BM bashing BW). It honestly hurts my soul cause I know the cause of it is white supremacy but at the same time we perpetuate it both knowingly and unknowingly. I saw a post where a African sista suggested all or most black Americans have "Stockholm syndrome" I think that is partially if not fully true. And Black men and women constantly attacking each other is a symptom
I think it’s more than bw and bm in relationships, this goes back to slavery. We were oppressed and taught self hate. House n***a vs field n***a. Light skinned vs dark skinned. East side vs west side. Welfare system separating black families in order to help provide. The system set us up as a whole. It’s a mindset we need to work together to get past. We need to come together as an entire race. I love my black men. All black men aren’t f-ed up. Just like all black women aren’t f-ed up. We just need to learn to build each other up and have each other’s back. We need to embrace that black love. And considering what we go through, still on a daily basis, that should make us want to do better as the black community. We’re up against enough as it is.
Nothing makes me happier to see than the black family which can only exist between black men and women. We can't fix any of our issues by running to others. Having self hatred and continuing to blame each other when we both have work on ourselves to do. Black men are the leaders and need to do better. Black women should listen and be our support system. We have to love and respect each other. NO ONE WILL LOVE US MORE THAN US! NO ONE LOVES US BUT US!!!
The world is bashing the entire community and apparently we are the only ones that don't see how ridiculous and counterproductive it for us to then turn around and bash each other. We are all 2 blame tf now lets figure out how to fix it
From their mother's, having them out of wedlock, going from men to men, beating her son's, emasculating them, etc. Same with young black women. A lot don't get along with their mother's. We make poor descissions as a people.
@Marly B I said, "we make bad decisions as a people". It's the group as a whole. When women purposely pick a bad man, it holds hard on her, not saying the men are not at fault, but women usually discount the nerdy, decent black men, in their child bearing, or prime years, in our culture.
@Marly B One thing I noticed about women, they don't have accountability strongly. Yeah, they may raises the kid, feed them, or half way raise the kid, or the kid is stuck with her. The woman is the gate keeper to sex. When you tell her, your a bad mother, etc, she can't take it. Men, we don't argue against criticism like women, as a whole, but I think this is because the women are left with the kids, and they feel like, you can't judge them, but it's nature as well.
@@floodworldwide5260 the fathers would be present too if the women made better choices. If BW would 'marry before you carry' it would reduce the problem by at least 75%
Beating up on one another does not heal the pain we both feel. It only breeds more hate and brokenness. It is really sad to see each other dragging one another. Can't fix what's broken n someone until u fix the brokenness n u. Until that happens, this mess of shifting blame onto the other will continue.
Thank you for posting this. Yes. This needs to stop. Just remember..a lot of our issues were brought to us from outside of our race. Mind control, media, poverty, and much much more. Details too long to discuss but this was purposely done and our people do not realize it. We fell into the trap. I hope one day someone will speak on that. It’s not a surfaced situation. Being placed into these situations created us to hate ourselves. Anywho…I LOVE MY BLACK MEN 💯. I am older than a lot of you but I remember seeing the changes in the early 90’s. We gotta Pull together. The world hates us already due to our skin. Time to stop the foolishness ladies and gentlemen. it’s ok if my comment are not received well but I speak from the heart. Our people need to stop tearing each other down. This is our destruction along with the destruction towards us from other races. Time to wake up my people. Blessings. 💜
The sad thing is our forefathers sacrificed their lives for us. Sadly, we have two war fronts. We fight racism and Black on Black hate which is manifested in various ways. All we've wanted was to be valued and cared for like other races of women. Black women are forced to be the leaders of our families (an unfair and daunting task) but criticized for being too strong. The privilege of "being taken care of" eludes us. Check out "Aint I a Woman" by Sojourner Truth (1797). Today I feel like she did, buy why? In 1964, wasn't I born free? Shouldn't I feel free and valued in my own community? A dear friend said, "Girl when I finish marching for Black Lives Matter, I'm going to march in my own community!" Signed, Lady
I love black men more than they will ever know. When I’m in the presence of some of them I feel intense hatred and don’t understand it. I just turn away because it is so deep and strong. I’m so glad I came across your channel. I feel the love and understanding you have. Why are you this way and these other men fell off? Your circumstances don’t seem much different. From other videos, it seems like your mom was single at times and working hard, had a guy would wanted to mooch of her and finally found a good dude later on. You could have been bitter and turned against black women since she had to wear the pants at times. What was the difference maker here and how can we replicate this formula to educate other black men to be like you?
People are free to date whomever they choose to do so BUT when one on race of men date out higher than any other race l, statistically known for abandoning their community to nest in another man’s community,abandon the women and kids higher than any other race one must question his pathology.No matter what race you date if you’re not whole you will only Eve up hurting yourself and other innocent people that goes for bm/bw.Fix your community first before you invest/build other people because they are ALL doing well. So we’ll look into our community they gather their wealth from us. It’s called survival they stick together....
Wow!!! You see it. Thank you Lird Jesus. May God bless this brother. May our Lord Jesus, protect him, bless him and bring pure goodness on him and his generations to come.
Time has really changed.. I look young but I am old school.. Back in the day black men loved black women...I absolutely hate that my daughter has to grow up in a generation where black women are devalued.. I am so glad I grew up in another era and am already married.. It is really hard for black women now.. I know so many good black women that are ladylike and very kind that's still single because black men has lost interest in black women overall.. They are really missing out on good women because of the stereotype they have in their head about black women.. Not all black women are the same..Not every black woman is loud, mean, masculine.. Don't miss out on a good woman because of the stereotypes.
@Dc A-N-D-Y I am going by the comments from ordinary black men on social media.. I have never heard so many black men putting black women down.. I know it isn't every one
No disrespect brodie but every relationship I been in lasted 2-3 months ... I decided to be with a Filipino woman and now I’m married with a beautiful daughter, and most importantly I’m respected
I know black women who are in healthy, happy relationships with Filipino men, too. I guess Filipinos are just more respectful then blacks in general huh? (Rhetorical question). There are whole threads of men of different races who love black women and who get respect from them. It goes to show that out of millions of people in every race of people, there are good and bad men and and women. Also the energy you take into a relationship will also contribute to the energy you receive. It’s beautiful that you have a happy marriage, but best believe it isn’t because black women are inferior to your Filipino wife… because conscious black men and men of a plethora of other races prefer us. Your marriage is happy because you met the love of your life. Nothing more nothing less.
@@ErinDeNis Get real. Only a tiny percentage of non-BM prefer BM. BW are the least desired and least married group in the US by a country mile. No one else is even close.
Thank you for sharing your view. Willie Lynch taught the masters well. I work in an area where i see most of the couples and families with their own. Somehow we forget in slavery how the black woman worked right next to the man, may have given birth that morning. Miss Bell sitting siping her tea looking refreshing? Somehow put on the pedestal. We forget that 40% of slave owners were women. Today, i find it interesting that the black woman is the come up woman but once you arrive that changes. It's not by accident that we our celebs, athletes, politicians with others outside their race. When we do it, we're gold diggers? Can't blame them! They have a hero with a whole lot of zeros to back them up. It keeps the money in the community, while you enjoy sipping that tea.
The X-Factor is parents half to be present and explain the difference between reality and social media and the consequences from their actions! I feel ya on this topic! If you comfortable in your skin.
I hope you develop a seminar and go speak to some of these men. Just by doing a search on your topics..this is EXACTLY what they NEED to be hearing. This mindset is how we turn things around for our community as a whole. Black women can only take so much disrespect and hatred from our own men..that we stand on the Frontline for,before our own sense of self preservation kicks in. Cause WE have no choice...WE as Black Women HAVE TO survive and make a way out of no way..because OUR KIDS are always depending on us.
This is pure facts and when black women comment to take up for ourselves it's a problem, I am probably gonna be banned from tube because as soon as it becomes disrespectful, I have to take up for my self and it's sad, because I have never had a negative comment to say about black men or about anyone to each it's own. Salute to you on your podcast and I wish you all the success!
You should debate Cynthia G. You could learn a lot from her and maybe her from you. You two are about the same age. She is one of a kind. Make sure you come with objectivity, receipts, and statistics not just emotions. Above all don't take anything personal and don't get triggered.
My concern is that BM look to BW for the solution when they are the leaders. If BM collectively started policing their communities and the other BM around them Things would change drastically. BW would start feeling safer and heard which leads to them aligning with BM.
Bull. Black women don't want Black men to lead. They equate it with slavery. Anything that benefits Black men or has the potential to set them up for leadership, Black women will be the 1st to get in the way and mess it all up: Obama's "My Brother's Keeper", The Detroit 300, Ice Cube's CWBA, etc.
Don’t forget to subscribe 🤝
Subbed. 🙏🏽💯
I’m glad I found your channel. I didn’t think there was anyone similar of my school of thought out there. Very refreshing and hopeful that I found you. If you would be down to collab at some point please get @ me.
Subbed.💯%
Interracial unions create confused offspring. There's enough confusion to last us a while. Black men date outside due to self-hate. Black women have racial loyalty and date out by default. Plus we out-number yall, so we are more justified to date out.
Subscribed! 🙌🏽
I felt this one all in my spirit. I hate how you are in the minority though. I have come to accept that as a black woman, I am not only hated by non-blacks, but black men as well.
I hate that this is even a issue. Thank you for watching ❤️
Same with black men everyone hates a black man. Don't wanna hear it.
Hate the behavior, not you as a black woman. Black men and women, hate each other's behavior.
That's a sad truth and a hard realization to come to ☹️
@@bluejay9968 bm hate black women... Sugar coat it if u want. When u hate a woman's COLOR it's not about behavior.
It was all cool when black men were bashing bw and we were silent tho, we just took it. Why did black men not speak up then?
I can honestly say that I was never aware that black men bashed black women this badly until recently. Of course I’ve always known about the way rappers disrespect women, but it never occurred to me that those lyrics were so damaging to y’all. I guess it was easy to overlook because we always see women turnin up to the very music that degrades them. It’s like we’ve been programmed to ignore venom as long as it has a nice beat to it. I woke up to that when my daughter was born. It’s hard to ride down the road with your daughter in the back seat and sing along to a song saying bit***s ain’t sh*t. That’s why I’m going so hard on this topic. Men have to do our part to reverse or at least try to see if we can heal the pain we caused. That’s how I sincerely feel. I just hope it’s not too late. I want my daughter to have a chance to have a loving husband one day.
@@TheShumakeWay how about all the songs, and celebrity that bashed BW on TV every chance they got??? Never did BM stood up against that.
@@TheShumakeWay Aww I didn’t know you had a daughter. She’s a lucky young lady to have such and intelligent and introspective dad.
@@jubilantsleep yea she got me wrapped around her finger too lol. I appreciate that
@@TheShumakeWay You are a good father.
You’re the only man I’ve come across on TH-cam that has taken an objective stance on this topic. It’s sad to see so much division in our community. The blame game is old and childish.
I fell down the "manosphere" rabbit hole a few months ago since lockdown and let me tell you it all makes sense now! As a BW from the UK I disagree that this is not a conscious decision being made by BM particularly over here where statistics show that BM marry IR more than they actually marry into the community. This backs up what I see when I go outside my front door. I'm sorry but the only way us BW will create any type of family is to leave and go outside the community also, otherwise the numbers/ratio to BM just don't add up. We can no longer just "wait and see what happens" like we've been doing. This is the reality.
Right. What's even more funny is that the dudes telling women to change and submit aren't even dating. They're not on any woman's radar.
Further, the ones leading the pack aren't dating black women in the first place--based on looks. A woman can't make a man date out. Sorry. That's a decision created by society long long ago. Ever since blacks were allowed to marry, they chose to marry *light and bright;* and now it's popularized by athletes and rappers to marry *white.* It has zero to do with black women, and everything to do with the status quo. Black men use whites to work their way up the social ladder. It's a status symbol.
*Black must women marry out for their own good.*
Another thing, they won't tell you is that marriage is common. Anyone can get married, rich or poor, 3rd world or 1st world, ugly or attractive. What isn't common is having a life for yourself, earning a living, and having freedom. I've watched families live on less that 5 bucks a day all over the world. And black folk in the Western world are worried about who submits to whom, and who's attractive. No wonder we're at the bottom.
@@aubreyjames8795 Thank you Aubrey! And this isn't to discourage anyone but the UK has more mixed/bi-racial children at primary/kindergarten age than ever and the majority make up of their parentage is BM ! The genders just aren't getting along and BW are now accepting that it is the way it is. There are too many of us single and 30+ BW daydreaming about some monoracial society! You know I've come across a BM channel recently referring to us as "daggles" which is basically some entity to be "bred out." BW cannot do anymore, for decades we've been begging for attention, we tried to better ourselves through education but apparently that's not enough and makes us come across as facetious or better than. BW are attacked for weaves, general appearance, morals and attitude which is the whole totality of what makes up a person! Would still love to meet a marriage minded, normal, working BM, but yeah, for the majority of us it's time to go.
@@fi734 No prob! I'm 100% with you on everything except that "we tried to better ourselves through education." No, education was a duty unto ourselves for our own future because in *reality* no one is going to pay your bills. We were lucky enough that our parents told us to go to school instead of working in retail for the rest of our lives.
The truth is that we tried to better ourselves through hair weaves, and nose contouring, and the reality is that there's not enough makeup to turn a black person white. The fact is that we tried to degrade ourselves to be accepted, and that wasn't enough. So this is actually why we have to leave. That path is the way to hell. Why change yourself for a man at the bottom of the international social ladder? Why better yourself, and change your looks for a man that refuses to build a family? Black men can blame the women, but the proof is in the pudding. White women get the same black men that the black women get. Iggy Azalea is a great example. Kylie Jenner is a great example. Khloe Kardashian is a great example. The men have no accountability.
Daggles? Black men will be bred out as well if they keep having mixed babies. That's just logical. Not that they'd care, since they have a deep case of self hate anyway. What type of man needs a white chaperone to navigate through society? 😬*Some black man said, 'with a white wife, you get better loans at the bank'??* You mean a black man cant figure out how to look presentable and walk into the bank as a man, and convince the bankers that he's worthy of a loan. You can command respect with your own presence? Must have something to do with sagging pants.
Black women are only attacked because black men who aren't dating are angry at black women for having better careers, and and not choosing them. Black men are attacking black women because we're easy targets. Why? You have to ask yourself why you were on those manosphere channels in the first place. Those channels play on desperation. You said, we can't be single in our 30s? Uhm, since when is being single in your 30s a pressing matter? Half of the women complaining don't understand the fundamentals. You can't get married in a society build on dating. You can't find quality in a society that doesn't value you. That's why you go to a different country, and put yourself out there. Get on a dating app, go to a bar, go to meetups. If you want to date, you date. If you want marriage, you don't date, you find a marriage market. This is why Candace Owens didn't date her husband. They were ready to marry after a month.
Engagement for two years and living together before marriage is BS: Unless the goal is a lived-in BF.
You should watch chrissie, the pink pill, and Cynthia g. They are great women!
Sad but true.
Black women need to keep it moving!! Most BM are lost!! You deserve peace and healthy connections!!
Yes, BW should keep moving. But...... notice how in order to have a successful relationship with a man of any other nationality, BW basically have to become totally different ppl. BW aren't the loud, unpleasant, disrespectful, and masculine problems with those men as they are with BM. You can justify it however you like, say you're allowed to rest in your femininity or whatever nonsensical bs you come up with. But, just know, if you understand you had to change who you are to be successful, you also understand at some level, you were the problem.
Am so happy black women are getting smarter 😊
@@Blakkfoot We're not changing who we are if we're saying we're not loud and stuff, we are gonna perpetuate stereotypes anymore!!!
@@user-nm8sf2sy7q but BW do change who you are in order to IRD. It's usually easy to sniff you out because the vast majority of you take on this specific way of speaking - the valley girl, your white girl voice. It's ok. Go. Be happy. Just know that when you start throwing stones from over the fence, we see you.
BTW, it's not a stereotype that BW are loud and stuff. It is a culturally verifiable characteristic. By comparison to women of other races, BW are louder, more vibrant, and possess greater life when in the moment. That is what attracts white girls to BW. They want to be you. They don't have that spark that BW have that make them just better. From a distance, BW are having the time of their lives; particularly when their in a group. So don't try to pass it off as a stereotype. I know better.
@@Blakkfoot Cut the BS! You make it sound forced that BW act differently. Please, it’s not that they act differently it’s that they are finally allowed to be their selves instead of dealing with struggle love with BM. That femininity has always been there but when BW have to always pull the chain to do most of the work in a relationship with a BM then what do you expect?
Most of us black women are no longer interested in black men. I have met too black men with the man-child syndrome and wounded-childhood issues. I am not interested fixing the walking dead (internally).
@MFS
Lose what? Our high rates of single motherhood? Oh please do leave. Leave and take the rest with you.
@ MFS, I hear you sir but, you are terribly misguided. Black women have always been and will continue to be the Universal Gold Standard. Many want to be us, yet don't have the capacity to withstand the storms that come with it. You sir merely want someone who will put up with your B.S. and not challenge you. Hey, to each his own.
literally THE WALKING DEAD
@MFS lose what? we are the prize lil boy! we are the one with the FAVOR little BOY!!!! we are the one who give life to all LITTLE BOY!!!
@@monimoni305 thats EXACTLY what he wants baby a doormat a yes women 🤣🤣🤣🤣no backbone
There's a sacred text that says, "There are only two emotions, love and fear." What looks and feels like hate is really fear. At one of my book signings, an intelligent, distinguished black man said to me, "Black men have to forgive black women for surviving."
I believe there are many reasons most black men refuse to take responsibility for their part in the sad predicament of our relationships, families, and communities but here's just one: they mistakenly believe to say they failed at one or two things means they ARE a failure. It's that all or nothing thinking.
I don't know how much I appreciate you. Men like you give me hope for my grown daughter, that she might just meet a responsible, intelligent, black man with integrity capable of love and marriage.
@Surisukii69 Mercy They have to forgive Blk women for something they never did and Blk women have nothing and are just surviving
So, if we have to "forgive" black women for surviving what do black women have to"forgive" black men for? Have we not been surviving as well? Theres plenty of shit I've been through and I'm sure other black males have been through and we don't get no passes, even if we are not the minority of guys passing you around like hotcakes and making children, even though we are not the ones with a criminal background or cheating, we still get told by these females that we need to Check other grown adult males, we need to protect a group of females who aren't even checking for us, we are told to provide for a community that is okay with saying they don't need us. Make it make sense, you push people away and then ask for allies and say we don't have anybody because. I have yet to see one black female in Shumake's or Derrick Jaxn's comment section say, you know what? When are WE as females going to get it together? Why are we so preoccupied telling men how to govern other men when we just want to be able to go around and make a mess and then be forgiven. Why is it so gosh darn hard to tell another black female to straighten the fuck up! You can't because you got black women who will shame you and call you a pick me, who will tell you to stay on code for bad behavior.
@@LukaDonesnitch Because statistically in society black women (generally) have it more together. Black women are not perfect but they definitely support their family, their men and their community.
@@filmadcamp1512 They do not have it more together, this is based on an individual opinion of yours. They are not supporting the community or black men a large swath of black women support themselves and the gynocracy.
@@LukaDonesnitch Actually it is supported by facts and statistics.
It has gotten so bad I have no interest whatsoever in dating at all. Indeed, we need to come together on it. Having these talks are instrumental cause I’m not going to rest until it changes. I’m tired of it too. Appreciate you talking on it candidly.
Same here sis. I have no interest in dating at all and it is So sad
@@CookieH14
Be not discouraged though. We have to have hope and work. As long as we are teaching “get better” things can begin to turn around as we do that.
@jellingtonmellington they will if you're limited.
Same here...I just want to live my life in Peace..without men.
Same. What's the point.
My Daddy always said if "your woman is out of order" its cause "The man is out of order" once the MAN get his act together the woman will have no choice but to fall in order! Point,blank and petiodt!
This works 100%
So your dad taught you to blame your problems on the man? Interesting.
@@jbadams56 sounds like her dad taught her whose accountable. Who's supposed to lead? Who's the man? Tjats who's accountable
BS
Your father is 100% right!!
When I was younger I adored black men. But I quickly learned they abhorred my kinky hair and dark skin. I can’t change those things, nor do I want to, so I looked elsewhere. Being ignored and undervalued by black men honestly is the reason why I started dating interracially. Men of other races treat me better than my own. I don’t experience half of the problems with other men that I did with brothers. Sad to say. I think it’s because brothas think I owe them something for simply giving me any attention. They automatically assume I’m thirsty just because I look a certain way. They don’t work hard enough to attract or keep my attention. Whereas, other men will work harder to impress me. Other men will bring their A game, because most women of all races require that-not just sistas. The “high quality” men who approach me are usually men of other races. I’m exotic and attractive to these men- with my dark skinned and kinky Afro (and actually, they prefer my hair to be natural. It doesn’t matter if it’s short or long as long as it’s me). Why should I make a fool of myself chasing after Brothas that prefer redbones or “lighter skinned” women with silky straight long hair when I can be with a man who thinks I’m a goddess because I’ve embraced my kinky locks and thick shape? Most brothas I know are with women who are lighter than them so the preference has long been clear. I simply got the message and some self-respect with it. That’s all. I don’t hate brothas at all. I just don’t fall into their category of preferences so I moved on. Interracial dating is not easy-let’s be honest. Bias still exists. But I don’t even look at brothas anymore romantically. I just don’t have the interest anymore. I’d rather be happy single than miserable coupled with a man who doesn’t really want me.
@@brandongipson9552 I agree some black women need to understand where black men like you come from as well.
Men work as hard as they have to. They just don’t see you as you see yourself.
@@joewatts8018 yeah, clearly that’s true. I’m not mad at it. I’ve just filed the stop work order, accepted it and moved on. That by no means suggests that if the right man came along and he happened to be black I would reject him, but I’m no longer interested in going above and beyond to appeal to black men -or any man really -that are not interested in my brand of beauty. To him I’m not beautiful, but to another I’m a goddess. It’s as simple as that. I think many women might be better off to do the same. It’s been my experience that many black men hold black women by a much higher standard than other women. That’s just my personal experience-clearly not everyone has experienced that, but I’ve seen that. And generally I think all parties should absolutely bring their A game. But if you do and you’re still running into these problems and you feel forced to make choices that will do harm to you emotionally or physically just to appeal to specific men or women , it might be better to move on because all it establishes is that this is not about you, it’s about pander to their preferences. Pandering and desperation doesn’t look good on anyone. If his wants are not in line with yours, move on to a man who will look at you favorably. I just don’t look to black men first anymore because the men I would be open to dating typically are not interested. I would love to say it’s because I’m not feminine, sexy, fit, intelligent, confident, spiritual, successful or attractive enough, but that’s not the case. They just want something else and I just have more success elsewhere.
Well said
I absolutely agree. I see it all the time here in London. When you see a black Woman with a white man she is almost always in here natural state.
honestly im shocked that some of these black men hate black woman the way they do ,because all of my life all i ever saw was black woman helping , marrying even if the guy has no money. continue staying with cheating husbands and husbands that abused them. so exactly which ones they hate?
All of them. After one bw rejects them, they spiral.Don't forget the ones doing the most like working, going to school and raising their kids while the man is in & out of jail because of child support for his other kid(s).
To answer your question....the MASCULINE ones.
@@joewatts8018 that's another pathetic excuse. I see black men and boys on TH-cam Twitter and tiktok saying that black women are ugly ratchet and that no man wants to be with them but yet they sit here praise white women by putting them on the pedestal while bashing us. That's sign of self hatred! Now I'm okay with interracial dating as long as you don't tear the other person down.
Black Women is not victims,
All you see on social media is bw bashing bm .
My goodness Willie Lynch really did a number on our community and it has span decades. And passed down generation after generation. Where has this hate come from? We have to go back and look at history in order to see how it’s affecting us today. Our community is messed up. How do WE collectively fix this? It’s not just for BW to fix and it’s not just for BM to fix. We need to come together as a team and fix this issue. Our society is broken. It seems that globally we as black people look for reasons to separate ourselves from each other just like the way Willie Lynch intended it to be. Other communities see the hate that exists between us and they laugh at us. It’s so sad to see because I can only imagine how amazing we would be if we can even have a respect for one another let alone if we started to love each other. The media doesn’t want blacks to get along which is why certain images are pushed and black people buy into it. We need to wake up! Because our community is dying off slowly.
I tell people this all the time! They manipulated our psyche to the point that we hate each other! It’s really deeper than the surface! It goes back to the breaking down the black family dynamic! I always ask people to educate themselves about themselves especially black people! We need it the most because we’ve been lied to so much! I love black men and black women! I love and appreciate my people! But we have to give the same love and compassion to each other that we so freely give to others because of the feeling that as black people that we have to minimize each other in order to feel worthy in someone’s eyes who is unworthy of us as a people! Let’s hold each other accountable while not forgetting to hold ourselves accountable in the process! We have to heal and it’s going to take having those painful conversations! Healing, Love, and Peace!
@@queenedroe9811 I’ve decided to stop watching content where black people bash each other, and instead look at content for how we fix this collectively. We marched together in BLM globally but now things have gone back to how they were, if not worse. It’s almost like it didn’t mean anything. A lot of people in our community talk about dating out like that’s going to solve our issue. Black is beautiful and I can’t imagine being anywhere else. I’m not saying people shouldn’t date out because that their choice, but they need to stop bashing one another when they do and black people seem to be the only race that does that.
I agree but I would like to add to what you've said. Actually the beginning doesn't begin with the beginning of slavery; it begins with the fall in the garden of eden for mankind. satan hates/ hated Gods creation and deceived eve. If you really desire our problems to be dealt with you must go back to the beginning and seek to understand why the human race is is in a fallen state, how we got there, and how to get out. Try to understand why you are always cursing, where it comes from, how you got there and why you can't stop. You're tired???? We are tired too.
The movie Claudine , was the perfect example of the breakdown of Black families. They purposely removed the Blackmen out of the household. If you haven't seen it check it out. It stars, James Earl Jones and Diana Carroll. Wonderful soundtrack by Glady Night and the Pimps. Go check it out if you never seen it. One of my favorite movies.
They dont wanna do that bro.. they want to just keep blaming BM for everything, when we do things to uplift our community they dont even appreciate it, or its not good enough..
Black men have done fucked up shit but its a problem that is fueled by both BW and BM we need to come together
WHEN will MEN be accountable for contributing to broken homes, creating dysfunctional relationships, having kids with multiple women and start accepting there is cupability on their side as well. No one is solely the blame, but STOP bashing ALL women for the actions of a few. Women want good relationships, successful careers and family. There are LOTS of beautiful, phenomenal, successful, hardworking, supportive and extraordinary women. If you want a GOOD woman, you have to be a GOOD man.
There are more women in careers these days.
Men could try trade school and blue collar.
They could make good money in mechanics, welding, etc
EXACTLY
And I oopppp
💯
Well said!!
Here's the biggest solution to this issue. The BM and BW who have no problem with addressing their internalized issues needs to address and fix those issues. Once all that's cleared up, we need to bring together all the resources we have, purchase about 10K acres of land and build our own.
Like-minded BM and BW should only be apart of this process.
This is a temporary solution. Seek God and He will give you a permanent answer. Jesus said without me; ye can do nothing. Have you ever considered why in spite of our trying to fix things it doesn't work nor does it last? It's because we are all to blame...yes I said it.....we are all to blame and the devil piggybacks off of our refusal to repent, our refusal to submit, our refusal to honor God, and our ignorance. We're the only ones who don't know it. The Bible says my people are destroyed for a lack of knowledge. You can't give what you do not have. Go back to the beginning people, learn about God and He will teach you about yourself......but only if you seek Him earnestly. God is not your problem.....sin is.
@@angelahepburn1524 Out of respect for others, I choose not to touch on religion initially, but since religion has been brought to the table, I will respond accordingly.
The Most High has ordered His people from the beginning to seperate from the other nations. To not seek treaties or marriages with these people. As everyone can clearly see, we have done the opposite which is why we are cursed with curses and scattered to the four winds to this day. To acknowledge that we are in fact these people, repent and come together is what the end of my comment is referencing. The Most High coming back and finding His people behaving accordingly in what you are referring to as a temporary solution will be the beginning of the permanent solution. Remember, we are in fact in a temporary situation.
@@thegoldenerahaslanded
Sir, or Madam, I am not talking about religion. I'm talking about the plight of our people. I'm talking about what God has to say not what you or I believe. Remember God Alone is Sovereign and He alone is the Creator of all things. He has the last Word because He is the Word. Let us not use this time to give the adversary an opportunity to creep in and distort or misuse our plight. You have made some valid points and I agree and let's not inadvertently sweep aside each contribution based on the truth of the Word of God. We must be wise.
@TruJu 777 Exactly. I've come to the same conclusion.
@@thegoldenerahaslanded Truth
I am 24 years old and honestly, I not sure what to do about the brokenness in my community. I believe we do need to find a way to come together as a people.
Talk to your brothers, be the change that the younger generation can look up too, check your brothers behavior when you see them acting and talking like degenerates!
It’s getting deeper and deeper & idk if either side is realizing it, even though they both have their points and arguments.
Exactly! That’s why the argument is going growing so much. Women have legitimate reasons for why they think the way they do and so do men. But I’m not seeing a lot of people talking about how to solve these issues. I’m seeing more and more that people think it’s best to leave black alone when you choose to find a mate. It’s sad.
@@TheShumakeWay Well bm divested years ago and you have seen the results of the situation right now. Now BW are choosing to divest from BM, now it's a state of emergency because it's affecting the BM. The BM didn't care that the BW was left struggling to provide and raise children alone. I have said for years, BW were tired of being disrespected,m and concerns pushed aside. BW have done the best they could to support and encourage even when it wasn't returned. It's bad enough BW are hated by so many and for the BM to hate BW is gut punching.
@@TheShumakeWay, the solution is quite simple. Work on yourself. When you want to change the world, you start with the person in the mirror.
The thing is bw ARE working on ourselves. We're holding ourselves accountable, fixing our mistakes. We're seeking therapy. I've only seen a handful of men talk about going to therapy. Because of this, when bw come out on the other end with a brand new mind, there's no one to meet her there. The first person she looks for is the bm. He's still stuck on blaming her even AFTER she's fixed herself, not realizing that he himself is still broken. You can't date, marry or mate with someone that still has that mindset, otherwise, what was the point of you working on yourself?
The bm's best option is to stick with the bw. However, bw's best option is to expand her dating pool. There's just not enough good bm to go around. You sir, are few, far and between. You're really a needle in a haystack and that's the sad truth.
@@bjmartin6684 no one wants to have that conversation. They began trying to divest 15-25 years before Loving vs Virginia. This was during the time when Emmitt Till was murdered. They just had to have a white woman even if it killed them 😳
Thank you baby for being honest
Thanks for NOT putting ALL the Blame on the BLACK Woman like most of these Men that REFUSE to take ACCOUNTABILITY for their Actions👎
🙏ATL
@Info Tech Yes, you're right, some Black women have serious issues, but so do white girls, but Black men will take the ish THEY throw at them with no complaints! I'll never! forget hearing a little overweight Becky call her Black boyfriend the "N" because she was mad about something he couldn't handle inside the supermarket! When she saw me cut her a look, she changed her attitude quickly! I didn't cut her that look because she called her "significant other" the "N" word, no, I did it because I'm Black also, and if you'll call him that despicable name, you would call my brother, father or any other Black person that name if you were angry enough. Sometimes I think that Black men not only hate Black women but they hate themselves the most, and that's sad.
I hate to say this but it's the complete opposite. BW don't take accountability for anything, at least nothing that reflects badly on them. Not just in relationships but even with raising children. Think about it, whenever a black single mom raises a son and he grows up to be a professional athlete or entertainer she takes all credit but if that son grows up to be a felon then it's because "His daddy wasn't there." As much as BW say that they're the backbone of the black community they only want to take credit for all the good but for all the bad they blame it on BM.
@@mskfc1 Here you go repeating this tired old trope that has been disproven for decades. What you just said is some bullshit. 51% of black men are single and childless. 64% of black men are in the middle-class and according to the CDC black men make the most active fathers. Of that percentage of black males 85% are married to BLACK WOMAN. So black men haven't been running to non-black women, statistically speaking for the vast majority of us black women are our first choice. Everything I just said is a fact that you can check yourself with a simple Google search. Educate yourself next time before you keep spreading lies.
@@themaddogofcrenshaw7367 lol maddog will do🥰
Black women need to learn accountability.
Divide and conquer. If you can be magnanimous enough to date people outside your race who have continuously persecuted you can show kindness to your own, and maybe even yourself.
Truth🙌
Exactly!
🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
Facts...problem brothas like this are far and few in between
Dating outside your race does not mean Dating "white" but this matter speaks to BM/BW with the introduction of ww into the mix
First time u actually experienced hatred from bm for bw I was about 17. I befriended a ww at work and she took me to her house supposed to have been a quick stop then we were gonna go to wherever we were going (this was a good 15 years ago) well she warned me about her bf. The way she described him I thought he was a racist wm. I got in that house and it was a dark skinned bm. And the way he looked at me with so much hatred in his eyes. I couldn't understand it. How does someone have so much hatred for someone you never even met? And the way they were living the house looked like a trap house. Well he convinced her to not be friends with me. Thinking I as a bw would "taint her" as if I could have
🙄 Anyway I had never known anything like that before then. Since my studying the BC I have decided to drop my cape. The truth is scary where the bc is concerned. Absolutely frightening.
Is Rachel Naker your real name?
The marriage rate of Black women marrying outside of their race is ever increasing! The divorce rate is higher between black men and non Black women. Black women are THRIVING!
Speak facts sis
I guess 🤷🏽♂️ who cares? Im a black man and I dont value marriage at all. I dont need it. Dont want it. But out of curiosity I looked it up. Black women are most likely to get divorced, least married and most often single. Interracial marriage or black on black. Folks just cant deal with you guys for long periods 🤷🏽♂️
@@naysaynetwork5271 they ain't tryna that part. And most of us brothers are tired of there bs, and they love the ray rays and pookies🤷🏿♂️
@@naysaynetwork5271 bro you toxic asf..
@@notasaint8855 truth is toxic 🤦🏽♂️ Im with a black woman btw. 7 years.
This is refreshing
💯💯💯💯💯Right!!! I just clicked off a video (a black man in Colombia talking about how the women are the most beautiful... 👀🤔 have you even been all over the world?) and landed peacefully here...
It is so nice to a black man speak highly about the sister on youtube and keep it real and calling out people who hate on their own people keep up the good work
@True Truth why are you being bitter
Why do you think he's a diet cola or something?
@@tjwalker1755 lol good one
Ain’t no fixing it now black women we got to keep it moving💯💯
right keep it MOVING
There is no incentive in being with black men. Like none!!!
If you are done with “Black Men” then you are done with yourself, and anyone you love that is a product of the Black man and woman Union💀💀‼️
@@jady7559 soo true😂🤦🏾♀️I hate y’all🤧🤣
@@jady7559 LMAO AS IF
Black Women just divest. I did and now I am happy, in love, protected and married
I understand that you did what you had to do. I don’t blame you sis. But unfortunately that’s the end goal to have us all divided. You can’t be expected to save the whole race and be single forever. Do you.
Yet your still watching these type of videos stop lying
Married to a family that dont want you in it. Your a stain on the family tree 😂😂.
@@living9377 Indeed. They're trying to take us away from the bigger picture. This is about our liberation. IR dating can never lead to our liberation.
@@youcantberacisttowardswhit3917, im telling you she don't have no man of any race and it's funny how they lie, and say they have a white man when they really don't.. And they are not protected by them either.. She's probably some very unattractive dark skin over weight Blk woman those are the main ones talking about divest and she's probably a foreign Blk woman at that..
As a woman that was married long term and now divorced. We need to look at how to love and be honest with each other. We are flawed on both sides. I agree only families will heal our current issues. Alot of times immaturity and insecurities is what starts the negative behaviors. If both people are working on themselves that is a winning solution. Accountability, self awareness and working on you is the only steps forward.
New subbie. Love your content and am VERY proud of you. That said, I don't agree with your stance in this video though I believe you to be genuinely concerned about the future of BP.
The fact is this "beef" is not a WE thing but a HE thing. Black dudes are SOLELY responsible for the shambles much of our community is in as well as the warfare between the genders. SOLELY responsible. If you want the warfare to stop, the discussion and change needs to be made within BLACK MEN. PERIODT. Black women have done waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more than our fair share in holding down the race FOR CENTURIES and WE IS TIRED! If y'all want Black people to continue together, you Black MEN will have to fight for it. Remember, NONE of you came to us to tell us how to hold it down or keep our head's or that we're appreciated. We did it because WE value our culture while most of you only value being men. Further, calling out the hypocrisy and selfishness of the average American Black guy is not bashing but TRUTH TELLING and it's loooooong overdue. No more excuses fellas. You want it? YOU fix it. We're going somewhere to rest.
@Surisukii69 Mercy
I wish bm collectively felt the same way. They feel they have no duty to bw or black children.
I just love you. Thank you. Couldn't have said it better myself. Black men and women need each other and that is the bottom line
You couldn’t’ve said it any better.💯💯🙌🏾🙌🏾
I am a Black Woman in my 40s, who is divorced and my experiences have been a hard pill to swallow down to my ex-husband cheating with a White Woman. Many of our Kings look at us as high maintenance, when the truth is...we are High Value and require a man to acknowledge the crown.
That’s why slot of black men act the way they do. Black women referring to them as kings. Kings build and they don’t won’t and never have.
What in the hell makes you think we want to deal with that high and mighty ish? Queen? Divas? We Hate It. Now wonder ol boy bounced. Respectfully mam.
@@joewatts8018 I have never once heard a black man ask a black woman to call him a king, NOT ONE SINGLE TIME. I have heard plenty of women call themselves and demand people refer to them as Queens, Princesses, Divas, Boss Bitches, A Prize, The Table, Goddesses, you name it. So, it's not the black man who's the problem a lot of these females are regular human beings, you're not a demi-god you eat, shit and sleep like the rest of us. You are not a person to be pedestalized and propped up on some soap box to be worshiped by a man. That is severe narcissistic behavior.
@@joewatts8018 they want sugar daddies 🤣🤣🤣
@@vinco4rilla so do white women as well
Bro I 100% agree with you on how stupid race war is. If everyone on both sides take responsibility, change their actions, and work on building with each other. Then the problems will lessen greatly. It's no point of pointing fingers because both bw and bm both have our faults. Just do better.
I go where I’m celebrated.
@bryangardner2374See ya too fool.
The finger pointing and constant fighting is so similar to the fighting between Conservatives and Liberals and it’s so exhausting and scary. I see bashing all day on both sides. My soul is tired and all of the decades of finger pointing have gotten us nowhere. When does it actually stop?
Right with you sista
FINALLY, someone who admits both sides are to blame instead of blaming everything on black men. Usually BW won’t take responsibility for anything.
my degree is in psychology and it doesn't surprise me. In counseling men in prison, I have found that women are blamed for many society ills that face black men. This is by design and by stupidity of our men to not value our women. Society have taught us to hate ourselves and why would our men value black women when they feel its easier to go the opposite way. But in prison, a black man expects this black woman to hold him down thru all his mess and years he face in and out of prison. You keep speaking your truth and yes black women got work to do as well....
We as a ppl/collective should have addressed this yeeaars ago. Should have never let the black division get this far... I'm glad someone's speaking on it. 💖
i agree.
Whatever Black female content creator you are talking about it is not her job to try to uplift Black males anymore, or try to give suggestions for ways they can change. This has been done time and time again. Black males have made their choices, and they didn't include being the men in the community.. Black women were left behind, abused, discarded over and over again. So were the children these men left behind. The time for talk is over. Black women are saving themselves first and have realized they will have to seek happiness outside of the community. We'll pray for ya'll 🙏
...lol
@👑DonBossalini👑 Peace ✌ Good luck to you and bottom shelf Becky 😘
@👑DonBossalini👑 That was a good one wasn't it..😉🤣 Have a blessed night 🌙✨
Black women put here discussing the truth and they call it bashing. There is nothing to fix.
Same sis, look at these men on these channels arguing with women. If they don't care that we're moving on why be so hostile about it?
All the "we don't care about you anyway, be gone" nonsense they carry on with. Sir, if you didn't care you would keep your mouths shut and carry on with your lives.
Y'all sounding really bothered 🤭🥴
I started watching TH-cam more intensely for the whole race divide videos. I had no idea there were channels about the bm vs bw issue. It’s crazy
Sadly, the bm that I have real relationships with in cases where they started only dating/married ww didnt jus arrive at love. ALL of them when asked honestly have spoke of hurts from highschool with blk girls, upset with yur blk babymama, or bw req something of them (monogamy, work, etc). Hurt bm that need healing...meanwhile ALL bw get blamed for who he chose, someone not taking his crap or he wasnt noticed becuz he was a nerd, etc. As if bw havent gone thru these same things and worse with bm all the time. Mature/intelligent bm need help with this topic. Many have no clue about the reality of what bw face daily(as you just said), stay clueless if they dated/married bw, and really need to start talking to one another. This is not the bw fight, we did all we could. BM can figure it out or not. Thank goodness bw are figuring out their worth and striving for better...even when we are attacked. Keep your heads up ladies, you deserve better and we can get better!
What have y'all done? Besides being non empathetic to other peoples issues besides your own? There is only one way this war will stop and that is when Black women stop being womanist & feminist and actually listen to other people's issues that they have with them. Not demand that men deal with their control issues, and bad behavior and lack of accountability. When y'all start really caring about what happens with others and not just taking what they say and using it to shame them or manipulate them then others will be receptive of what you got to say. Until then expect more of the same thing.
Be Focused on the people that like and accept you for who you are
I just wanted to express how I feel. I grew up in a two parent African household with my mom and father. I went to school with only white kids. The only group of people to make me feel bad about my skin is black men. I don't know if you saw the Rolling Stone cover when George Floyd died, but they put this dark skin woman on the cover. I was like, I'm a woman, I want a guy to push me back if a car is coming, but she looked like a man. And its like we are portrayed as masculine when literally I walk down the street, and when I see a guy looking at me because Im "exotic" I get scared.
I agree completely. 👏🏽👏🏽 It's like we need to call a truce or something. Everyone is so ready to point the finger and blame the other side... rather than taking time to figure out how to fix things & make them better for everyone.
You’re right.
The white man did a GREAT job on us, especially the men!
That’s crap!! YOU disrespect US, not the other way around! We put you in that spot to tell the white man to ‘Kiss your *ss, NOT to kiss and do more with white women! You tried it!
@dwight johnson lol 😂 we know brainwashing didn’t skip over you!
Yes, he did! It's time to have candid conversations like this with one another but everyone must come with open mind.
Yup and they’re going to continue serving they’re masters
When I was 24 years old, I just found out that there's a gender war between black men and women. I was stunned and a little shocked, because I was never exposed to black men hating on black women growing up. Most black men I grew up with don't gave a damn about how a black woman dresses, about her hair, her attitude, none of that BS. But now, it's getting to the point that it has to be addressed and how black men should stand up against hating black women.
If a black man hates a black woman, that means he hates himself.
I found out at the age of 18
I'm afraid so..he hates himself..
How is he hating himself, if he talks about why he hates YOU. He's not you. And you're not him.
No it's a response
@@newyorkfan16 Were all one, dude. If a black man hated black women in general, that means he hated himself.
💖💕💖💕 Yaaaas. Keep speaking on it.. We are all down here trying to live. None of us are perfect.
Can you please do a video on how some men have certain standards they expect from women but fail to adhere to these standards themselves. As a black woman myself, I feel that if a man is bringing to the table certain standards of his women such as telling him where she's going and time, address, etc., but they don't uphold these same respects for his woman. I feel like if he's bringing it to the table then that should be a set guideline he follows himself and shows that same respect for her in return.
You have me in literal tears. The hate from our own men is so sad. It's so hurtful to hear what these men say about black women. Total degradation, and I know exactly which part of TH-cam that you're speaking about. Please continue doing what you're doing. We need to come together and stop this.
Thanks for making these videos it’s very refreshing to see a black man speak positive on this topic
Yeah, it’s just something we’ve got to process thru due to all the systemic efforts to destroy our community. Some are in a very dark place right now and unfortunately, due to childhood issues, many will remain there.
I'm a black men both sides need to stop praising other race of people and black women need to stop praising no good black men and praise black men who will treat y'all like a queen. The only way us black men will find love is black women because black women know our struggles and we know black women struggle and black couple is everything.
@Thais Hayes what you mean
@Thais Hayes its both ways but I understand what you coming from
@Thais Hayes The BLM founders have said flat out they wish to dismantle the “nuclear family” (black mother, black father) & are an advocate for LGBT parenting lifestyle or and I quote. “Mother, PARENT and child(ren)
I agree
I agree with you. I wish that things had been different in my marriage. But, I have faith. I have two degrees, my FICO score is going up and I'm a teacher with two side hustles...
SO, King I'm proud that I am preparing myself for the next phase of my life where I will have a good man that loves and respects himself so that he can love and respect me.
Before it was black men preferring light skin black women. Now it’s black not dealing with black women period. Seen this type of mentality since I was a child...
This has been going on for over a century.
Preach young blood 💯 Always remember babies you are blessed, you are loved, and you are wanted and highly favored by your Heavenly Father! Be your best you and let love find you ♥️
I hate seeing it too I'm a black women love black men still...it breaks my heart to see this 💔
I think it's interesting we are the only race that seems to dislike one another...hmmm!
I been feeling this way for the longest dawg, I think post covid really intensified this nonsense
I love my black women and the statement he is making about black women.They are our beautiful black women who need support and love.We as black men need to be there for our black and spanish queens
Thank you for standing up for black women. Thank you letting our brothas know where they are missing the mark with us and calling them to accountability. Although I feel like black women can do better in some areas, black men need to understand that we have become strong or as they wanna say "hard" because a lot of us have been put in situations where we have had no choice but to be. As a single 40 year old, black professional female and mom of 3 sons, I will say that I desire nothing more than a strong black man to be submissive to. Does anyone ever think that we get tired of being strong too and just juggling the responsibilities of life? How we wish we had a loving black man to fall back on. But...our men along with so many other races degrade us, talk bad about us, make us feel so unwanted and unloved, all while we are dealing with raising the children they have left us with. I am so glad that I found your channel because it has restored my hope in finding a good black man and that there are still black men that value us. Thank you sir for this. Be blessed❤
Who told you to lay down and have 3 kids without a ring
@@Jayrebel225 who said I didn't have a ring? Even if I didn't, it doesn't take away the fact that black men need to do better by black women and their children. Shows your ignorance and that maybe you fall into the category of these type of men. Totally missing the point. SMH
He wasn’t standing up for us. He was just not biased. But even that is more support than what we usually get.
@@1newwoman07 and who supports those legitimate good brothers who work and have the desire to create black families, settle down and be stand up men? Instead the brothers that are the opposite of whom I described tend to get less support from sisters. Just stating observations and I dont hate or dislike BW just calling it how I see it. If our community needs to have a conversation then lets have the conversation as this gets glossed over, again, and again, and again.
I hate seeing the hate for black men and black women.
If your women are hard that means the man is soft 🤷 somebody gotta be the strong one in this world. It aint easy out here 🤦 you can't make anyone do anything. People don't change unless they want to. Change is up to the person not someone else
Right! It’s called polarity
But when a man acts like a so called hard female then hes abusive. So make it make sense you blk women are just idiots
Whole I agree with the majority of what's said in this vid, the fact will always be "A woman can never change a man. He has to see his wrongs and change himself."
That goes both ways you bw are not perfect but y'all have this accept me as I am flaws and all attitude that's the problem smh
Too many thoughts and feelings have been suppressed too long and are bubbling to the surface. Therapy is therapy and part of therapy is getting things. Personally, because of my upbri nging and pro black tendencies I prefer a black woman. We are dawning a new age and old tendencies are becoming outdated and the new age is ushering in. Having friends and family that have dated outside, it has broadened my perspective. This internet is a golden oppurtunity to put many thi gs on the ta le as a collective. With this pandemic and many forced to change old paradigms, many perspectives are bei g shared. Many bm and bw are frustrated with situations and are looking for alternatives. From a scientific perspective, these are necessary actions. The trick to me is, what are the results that truly serve our collective interests.From a godly perspective there is a master plan. Evidently this is part of the master plan. The niche is how does this play into your individual destiny. Get in where you fit in. What unique qualities do you possess that uniquely qualify you at this day and time to contribute to the collective progressively. Whe. I say you, I'm referring to me and all tuning in.If you trust and believe in the master plan, what are you mastering in relation to new heaven new earth.Amn Amn
Its so sad. I love my people, and I just really wish we would repair the relationships within our community instead of leaving everything so unspoken.
As young bw in the Community, I have seen a great deal of issues happening in the blk community. I’ve only been alive for 15 years and I have seen some horrible stuff happen in the blk community. My 9 year old cousin was raped at 9 and got pregnant by her mother’s boyfriend. Me, my other cousin, my sister, my step sister and I have all been raped by blk men. Then I go on the internet and see us blk men and women bashing each other. There playing the blame game of who has done the most stuff when that doesn’t matter. We’ve all been hurt it’s time we fix it. I see blk men punching the lights out of there sons. I see blk mothers and aunts criticizing their daughters and blaming them for being raped. We’re pushing each other down instead of building each other up. Don’t blame all blk men for the ones that mess up. And don’t blame all blk women for the ones that mess up either. Stop trying to blame each other for the issue happening in the community . I feel like more blk men need Counseling and teaching. And blk women need more uplifting. Help each other instead of playing blaming each other.
No blaming, no reasoning, no argument just understanding. If you understand, and show that you understand, you can love, and situation will change.
-For the community✊🏾
I'm not being ignorant just a genral question we've seen what BM dooo but what have BW did that has effected them it's not as obvious as what BM has done, stupid question but yeah!!!?
God are you ok and you’re family
No blk men bashing bw. Bw is just responding.
We need to uplift each other to get past this impass that seems to be driving us apart. A lot of the tension stems from Men's perception of what how they want their women represent them. They want you to be submissive, loyal, homemakers and sexually available at all times for their needs, and dependent on them. They seem to chastise women that are independent, successful, speaks their mind and fail to accept that they are often that way because they had to be strong and take care of themselves and educate themselves. Instead of embracing those as positives men often see that as attacks at their manhood. I feel that men want to keep us dependent and under their thumb and controllable, when we don't have our own they treat us any kind of way, use o!ur bodies, cheat and often abuse us because we don't have an option. But when other submit to that lifestyle we are seen as so combative and difficult. Real men appreciate all we as successful women bring to the table and celebrate us. What more should a man want than a woman that is truly there for love and respect or one that is only there to get all she can from him😢
At this point, I'm apathetic to the plight of Black men. Don't wish hell, don't wish you well, I just don't. 🤷🏾♀️
Who the hell you fooling. You never was empathic nor sympathetic to the Black men's plight. Selfish by nature and almost all of you all think is about "me, me".
@@malachiy13 I can't speak to your generalizations. I will say that I don't recall ever "empathizing" or "sympathizing" with your plight. You do realize "apathy" denotes indifference, right ?
Sadly, it wouldn't surprise me if you don't.🤦🏾♀️
@@malachiy13
Do you even know what "apathetic" means? Clearly not, cause your daft comment wouldn't be made if you knew the definition.
@@malachiy13 go away Tyrone
Imagine talking about BM’s so-called “plight” when, by almost every objective metric, BW are doing far worse in life than BM are. 😂 You Struggle Weaves are hilariously delusional.
I hate seeing or hearing about black men bashing black women and vice verse(primarily BM bashing BW). It honestly hurts my soul cause I know the cause of it is white supremacy but at the same time we perpetuate it both knowingly and unknowingly. I saw a post where a African sista suggested all or most black Americans have "Stockholm syndrome" I think that is partially if not fully true. And Black men and women constantly attacking each other is a symptom
I think if we sit down and actually just talk to one another it would be fine, but nowadays everyone gets sooo defensive about everything.
It’s nothing to talk about. Nothing to fix.
Please go away with your toxicity..if you don’t want to talk just go away and leave those who want to fix things
I’m good
Nonthing to talk bw will still be defiant and messy that will never change
This is such a gut wrenching topic to continuously talk about. 😢it drains me and break my heart into tiny little pieces
I think it’s more than bw and bm in relationships, this goes back to slavery. We were oppressed and taught self hate. House n***a vs field n***a. Light skinned vs dark skinned. East side vs west side. Welfare system separating black families in order to help provide. The system set us up as a whole. It’s a mindset we need to work together to get past. We need to come together as an entire race. I love my black men. All black men aren’t f-ed up. Just like all black women aren’t f-ed up. We just need to learn to build each other up and have each other’s back. We need to embrace that black love. And considering what we go through, still on a daily basis, that should make us want to do better as the black community. We’re up against enough as it is.
Nothing makes me happier to see than the black family which can only exist between black men and women. We can't fix any of our issues by running to others. Having self hatred and continuing to blame each other when we both have work on ourselves to do. Black men are the leaders and need to do better. Black women should listen and be our support system. We have to love and respect each other. NO ONE WILL LOVE US MORE THAN US! NO ONE LOVES US BUT US!!!
Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom. Much love and respect to you ❤. You are greatly appreciated.
Black relationships are done. Sad but very true.
Should have been done centuries ago
The world is bashing the entire community and apparently we are the only ones that don't see how ridiculous and counterproductive it for us to then turn around and bash each other. We are all 2 blame tf now lets figure out how to fix it
I agree with you if we're going to fix this we have to come together 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
It will never be fixed!!
@@IAimToTrigger we don't need your help to fix it 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Brokenness, From whom?
They'll never give you that answer as a means to not implicate themselves.
From their mother's, having them out of wedlock, going from men to men, beating her son's, emasculating them, etc. Same with young black women. A lot don't get along with their mother's. We make poor descissions as a people.
@Marly B I said, "we make bad decisions as a people". It's the group as a whole. When women purposely pick a bad man, it holds hard on her, not saying the men are not at fault, but women usually discount the nerdy, decent black men, in their child bearing, or prime years, in our culture.
@Marly B One thing I noticed about women, they don't have accountability strongly. Yeah, they may raises the kid, feed them, or half way raise the kid, or the kid is stuck with her. The woman is the gate keeper to sex. When you tell her, your a bad mother, etc, she can't take it. Men, we don't argue against criticism like women, as a whole, but I think this is because the women are left with the kids, and they feel like, you can't judge them, but it's nature as well.
@@bluejay9968 at least the mothers were present.
@@floodworldwide5260 the fathers would be present too if the women made better choices. If BW would 'marry before you carry' it would reduce the problem by at least 75%
I am new to it as well and it is quite sad. Self hatred is so rampant and therapy is needed.
Beating up on one another does not heal the pain we both feel. It only breeds more hate and brokenness. It is really sad to see each other dragging one another. Can't fix what's broken n someone until u fix the brokenness n u. Until that happens, this mess of shifting blame onto the other will continue.
Thank you for posting this. Yes. This needs to stop. Just remember..a lot of our issues were brought to us from outside of our race. Mind control, media, poverty, and much much more. Details too long to discuss but this was purposely done and our people do not realize it. We fell into the trap. I hope one day someone will speak on that. It’s not a surfaced situation. Being placed into these situations created us to hate ourselves. Anywho…I LOVE MY BLACK MEN 💯. I am older than a lot of you but I remember seeing the changes in the early 90’s. We gotta Pull together. The world hates us already due to our skin. Time to stop the foolishness ladies and gentlemen. it’s ok if my comment are not received well but I speak from the heart. Our people need to stop tearing each other down. This is our destruction along with the destruction towards us from other races. Time to wake up my people. Blessings. 💜
The sad thing is our forefathers sacrificed their lives for us. Sadly, we have two war fronts. We fight racism and Black on Black hate which is manifested in various ways. All we've wanted was to be valued and cared for like other races of women. Black women are forced to be the leaders of our families (an unfair and daunting task) but criticized for being too strong. The privilege of "being taken care of" eludes us. Check out "Aint I a Woman" by Sojourner Truth (1797). Today I feel like she did, buy why? In 1964, wasn't I born free? Shouldn't I feel free and valued in my own community? A dear friend said, "Girl when I finish marching for Black Lives Matter, I'm going to march in my own community!"
Signed,
Lady
Real talk
Hang in there Young Man. Your blessings are coming just hold on and do not lose faith. Peace and Blessings
So glad I stumbled across this channel! It's a blessing that black men like you still exist. There's hope for me 😀.
These guys are far and few
Some people choose to love and some people choose who they want to love.
I love black men more than they will ever know. When I’m in the presence of some of them I feel intense hatred and don’t understand it. I just turn away because it is so deep and strong. I’m so glad I came across your channel. I feel the love and understanding you have. Why are you this way and these other men fell off? Your circumstances don’t seem much different. From other videos, it seems like your mom was single at times and working hard, had a guy would wanted to mooch of her and finally found a good dude later on. You could have been bitter and turned against black women since she had to wear the pants at times. What was the difference maker here and how can we replicate this formula to educate other black men to be like you?
Definitely agree, sick of hearing it myself. Smh
Wise and Accurately said!🖤💪🏽🙏🏽
Yes Sir. &With Good Reason Might I Add.
Its levels to tha ish 🎲
Nice video ✌🏽
Thank you
Yes, there are many levels to this. Communicate is key. Thank you.
us black people need to start protecting n loving each other more stop sterotyping everyone go thru things in life .
People are free to date whomever they choose to do so BUT when one on race of men date out higher than any other race l, statistically known for abandoning their community to nest in another man’s community,abandon the women and kids higher than any other race one must question his pathology.No matter what race you date if you’re not whole you will only Eve up hurting yourself and other innocent people that goes for bm/bw.Fix your community first before you invest/build other people because they are ALL doing well. So we’ll look into our community they gather their wealth from us. It’s called survival they stick together....
Well they're actually not doing well, but they're doing better than us in a lot of ways.
Well said!
Your mama raised you right!
Wow!!!
You see it. Thank you Lird Jesus. May God bless this brother. May our Lord Jesus, protect him, bless him and bring pure goodness on him and his generations to come.
In other words Black women please divest. You deserve much better ❤️
Bye bye now.
Yes, tell them to disappear, so that we never have to see their back-stabbing faces again.
Time has really changed.. I look young but I am old school.. Back in the day black men loved black women...I absolutely hate that my daughter has to grow up in a generation where black women are devalued.. I am so glad I grew up in another era and am already married.. It is really hard for black women now.. I know so many good black women that are ladylike and very kind that's still single because black men has lost interest in black women overall.. They are really missing out on good women because of the stereotype they have in their head about black women.. Not all black women are the same..Not every black woman is loud, mean, masculine.. Don't miss out on a good woman because of the stereotypes.
@Dc A-N-D-Y I am going by the comments from ordinary black men on social media.. I have never heard so many black men putting black women down.. I know it isn't every one
@@overallwellbeingmatters4214 ♨️💯🗣
No disrespect brodie but every relationship I been in lasted 2-3 months ... I decided to be with a Filipino woman and now I’m married with a beautiful daughter, and most importantly I’m respected
I know black women who are in healthy, happy relationships with Filipino men, too. I guess Filipinos are just more respectful then blacks in general huh? (Rhetorical question). There are whole threads of men of different races who love black women and who get respect from them. It goes to show that out of millions of people in every race of people, there are good and bad men and and women. Also the energy you take into a relationship will also contribute to the energy you receive. It’s beautiful that you have a happy marriage, but best believe it isn’t because black women are inferior to your Filipino wife… because conscious black men and men of a plethora of other races prefer us. Your marriage is happy because you met the love of your life. Nothing more nothing less.
@@ErinDeNis Get real. Only a tiny percentage of non-BM prefer BM. BW are the least desired and least married group in the US by a country mile. No one else is even close.
Thank you for sharing your view. Willie Lynch taught the masters well. I work in an area where i see most of the couples and families with their own. Somehow we forget in slavery how the black woman worked right next to the man, may have given birth that morning. Miss Bell sitting siping her tea looking refreshing? Somehow put on the pedestal. We forget that 40% of slave owners were women.
Today, i find it interesting that the black woman is the come up woman but once you arrive that changes. It's not by accident that we our celebs, athletes, politicians with others outside their race. When we do it, we're gold diggers? Can't blame them! They have a hero with a whole lot of zeros to back them up. It keeps the money in the community, while you enjoy sipping that tea.
This IS God's Work. Do yo thang❤💪
I don’t think you’re pandering but idec this is like mending my soul fragments rn thank you God for this brother 🙏🏾
The X-Factor is parents half to be present and explain the difference between reality and social media and the consequences from their actions! I feel ya on this topic! If you comfortable in your skin.
I hope you develop a seminar and go speak to some of these men. Just by doing a search on your topics..this is EXACTLY what they NEED to be hearing.
This mindset is how we turn things around for our community as a whole.
Black women can only take so much disrespect and hatred from our own men..that we stand on the Frontline for,before our own sense of self preservation kicks in. Cause WE have no choice...WE as Black Women HAVE TO survive and make a way out of no way..because OUR KIDS are always depending on us.
This is pure facts and when black women comment to take up for ourselves it's a problem, I am probably gonna be banned from tube because as soon as it becomes disrespectful, I have to take up for my self and it's sad, because I have never had a negative comment to say about black men or about anyone to each it's own. Salute to you on your podcast and I wish you all the success!
You should debate Cynthia G. You could learn a lot from her and maybe her from you. You two are about the same age. She is one of a kind. Make sure you come with objectivity, receipts, and statistics not just emotions. Above all don't take anything personal and don't get triggered.
I think this is a good Idea too
Cynthia is not a friend of black people nor is the people that think like her
@@pauloskidane2819 Why because she tells the truth. The truth only hurts imbeciles.
@@pauloskidane2819 you are a weak male, the ones she talk about
No intelligent brother should debate/converse with a woman like her. It's just simply a waste of time and energy.
Thank you for this. ❤
My concern is that BM look to BW for the solution when they are the leaders. If BM collectively started policing their communities and the other BM around them Things would change drastically. BW would start feeling safer and heard which leads to them aligning with BM.
Bull. Black women don't want Black men to lead. They equate it with slavery. Anything that benefits Black men or has the potential to set them up for leadership, Black women will be the 1st to get in the way and mess it all up: Obama's "My Brother's Keeper", The Detroit 300, Ice Cube's CWBA, etc.
@@Solider7 you right. I definitely do not want BM leading me. IK exactly where that’s going. Beneath hell.
@@goodwill374then let's separate. We're not responsible for you, and you're not bound to us. Good riddance.
Black males led us into slavery and Jim Crow. No thanks. I'll stay with my wonderful husband 🤴👸🏿💕