Last year, 2019 at october my grandmother passed away by kidney and liver failure , the night we got the news she passed away at the hospital my mother told me not to cry for her because she wanted someone strong that she can rely on when she is on a breakdown at her death bed so i did listen to her and wouldn't drop a single tear even i was one of the people that took care of her body at the morgue,whenever im alone in my room i would cry like a baby because my grandma have taken care of me my whole life, since her passing my mother would cry everyday and i had to be there for her to cheer her up even i had classes or have to do some work,a month have passed my mother went to the hospital because she had trouble breathing when she got checked she had hyper thyroid that grew a size of a golf ball, she was put into sleep by the doctors to help her rest and stabilize her heart rate yet all a sudden at midnight her heart stopped for 6 minutes,she was able to get back to life but she was already in a critical condition,she got put into a life support machine because she was low on oxygen and couldnt breath on her own,things got worst at the fifth day where she got into the ICU , her blood was thin as water while her kidneys and livers started to fail ,she havent show any signs of improvement since then , 2 doctors ask me to come with them in a room ,they told me my mother cant be saved and we have to pull the plug because her organs are failing and started to decay from the inside by an infection that they cant identify what kind of infection, i had to pull the plug on my mother and let her pass away rather than live in pain at the hospital bed and i had to take care of her body at the morgue with some family members ,burying her was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life ,not long after my mother passed away my mother's uncle that im close with passed away from brain cancer and i had to go through the same thing Please love your family , that story was last year , this year 2 more of my family member passed away and i almost lost my girlfriend because of my mental health is unstable,the feeling of losing someone you love hurts you to your very existence
Youre so strong omg. Thank u for these words and stay strong ♡ i lost a loved animal, and i cant believe how you go trough this so many times. much love♡
@@horizonfan They met each other online when they were younger and got married, and they were living with each other and he found her dead one morning.
Those are the worst dreams, they bring the pain back so intensely. To have that moment of happiness again for a moment only to have it viciously taken away again. Same goes with the dreams where you have something you desperately desire in real life, then wake up and realize you're back in your shitty life and you have none of those things. Pretty soul crushing.
After 8 years my wife left. I kept having dreams for months that she was there. Every single morning when I woke up it was a split second of joy remembering the dream followed by extreme pain knowing she's gone. It's been 2 months and things do get better. It fucking sucks still and I'm still sad but I've been ok enough to go back into society. Everything I look at reminds me of her and our good times. It makes me happy to know that we shared so many good times together and that's what keeps me going.
I hate those dreams. It’s like a living nightmare, I had them for like 2 years after my gf broke up with me and it was a really hard thing to deal with, obv not comparable to mediumsea’s experience but I guess I can say that I know - at least partially - what it feels like.
@@bmx28kenilworth well I went through a similar scenario when my mother passed when I was 8 I watched her die as well and it’s burnt into my brain of that moment and even though I was going through the grieving process I was still able to openly talk about it without issue because I learned how to burden my emotions and let them all out at a better time than in-front of people which is probably what he is doing even 6 years later after my moms death it still effects me I have been growing less and less emotional as a person to the point where I can’t feel them anymore it’s like my body has a reaction like I’ll smile and laugh but my brain feels nothing no emotion I’m feeling yet im showing them
@@bmx28kenilworth people grieve in different ways. You say this is weird but who are you to judge how some one deals with a painful loss as tragic as this. I really admire him talking to us about it. A lot of people would just be done, but you ca tell through all the pain, he is still trying to make it through.
@@zvch330 Damn, I'm sorry that happened to you. I hope you're doing okay. Of course it would still affect you, you're only 14 and no one should have had to go through what you already have at that age. Based on your comment you seem like a very smart kid and if I may say, please talk to someone if you haven't already. Friends, family or maybe even a therapist/psychologist.
I really felt that whole "I keep having dreams where she’s ok, and I wake up and of course she’s not there." part One night last fall I had a dream that I woke up and called my Grandma, she asked how I was and made one of her friendly jokes about me sleeping in and how it was surprising that I was waking up early that day. And then I really woke up, got my suit on and went to her funeral. Losing someone that close, especially for the first time, you really learn to understand what other people feel in the same situation. I still have dreams like that. My Grandpa still cries at the slightest memory of her. They were together for 60 years. She was his highschool sweetheart. I was her first grandson. Obviously I wasn't as close as my Grandpa was to her but being the first and only grandchild for 8 years before my younger cousins were born I really got close to her, and that only made the event hit harder. I now have a more reformed, eternal sense of sympathy for things like this.
I lost my grandma who raised me since I was a baby (mom was a drug addict across the country and dad was a one night stand so idek a name) 7 years ago and my grandpa this year. Here and there i still get these weird dreams where I’m back home with my family and it’s just such a weird feeling in the dream and an even weirder feeling after waking up. Definitely makes me sad for the entire morning at least and most likely all day long. I’m sorry that you have had to deal with a close death and I hope days are bright for you at points.
Everyone i know that has lost someone sees them a few days after their death where they because the best version of themselves and i strongly beleive that that is there soul coming to say a proper goodbye before leaving
Honestly I think one of the biggest pains in life is losing someone you thought you'd spend the rest of your life with. Hope this guy makes it through all of that.
It actually is on the second place (death of a spouse), out of 50 items, on the stress scale of Holmes and Rahe. The only thing that is more stressful life event - is the death of a child. Thats why a breakup, often has the same intensity as a death of a loved one, because your brain kinda deals with it the same way. I once wrote a paper about that and its very interesting topic. Anyways, i wish the best for him. He sounds like a very collected and sweet person, whos goal was to just live in their own world.. Iam so sad for him :( Stay strong, she will watch over you with a smile :)
I split up with my wife last year and it has been difficult adjusting to my plans and expectations for the future just being cancelled all of a sudden. We had to split up, we were not getting on. I took it upon myself to sort out and move out of our marital home, and find somewhere new to live. Then I made big mistake at work and got fired. So I had to move back home with parents. I feel bad for not trying harder to get back on my feet, but I also feel it’s necessary to give myself time to heal.
I swear to god, I had a dentist when I was a kid, and the waiting room had an arcade in it, where that 7Up Cool Spot game was plugged into a Sega Genesis. I have never met anyone else who has played it, but I loved it.
The degree of connection MediumSea has with his wife is just astounding .The level of commitment they had for each other .They could only imagine a future where the other was there .I can only pray that all of us ( Who want it ) will have such a connection of pure unadulturated Love that the two of them had .And he loves her .And I wish him the best for all of his future .
I'm lucky enough to have found someone like that. I can only imagine the absolute heartbreak I would feel if something like this happened to her. I hope this guy is doing alright now.
Same here i have fpunf the person i want to spend literally every second of my life with and i cannot imagine it without her. I dont know what i would do if i lost her somehow i just idk we want to have kids and travel and go have so many experiences together. Shes my best friend i met her online on Kik and it was long distance still is for a little while longer once shes here itll be weird to be happy to have her here finally after 4 years of talking.
This one hit me personally. Lost my partner just over six months ago. Everything this guy said is very familiar. That being said... he's only two weeks in and he's keeping himself together really well. He must be strong.
I mean, I'm not in his or your shoes or anything, I just wanted to say that I've been dealing with depression and anxiety for the past 8 years and at some point the mask that I put on when I'm around other people got so strong that nobody would even notice when I have a full grown panic attack. What's going on outside and inside of you can be entirely seperate, at least that's how I experience it. I'm really sorry for your loss, and his too.
Sometimes, there’s literally no tear left to cry and that’s the only time when you can vent and talk normal. Once your eyes get a little rest from all the tears and they build up again, it’s like a waterfall all over again. It’s like a dam breaking, then having to repair the dam and hold everything in and then the dam breaking again letting those tears and emotions come pouring out again.
Lost my wife and mother of my children in March. We were separated at the time, but for me that makes it worse: lots of unresolved stuff and questions left unanswered. I was there for the whole week in the ICU, as the family relay and I did everything I could: medical decisions, holding her hand and playing her favorite music when the time came, funeral arrangements, telling the kids...I kinda lost pieces of myself that week. It really takes a long time to get better. Relying on friends and family, even just virtually, helps a bit, but with the way things are now... Not being able to have the funeral, gather people together, get that closure, is extremely difficult to deal with. Everything he was saying about how it feels resonated with my experiences as well. Hopefully, he's doing ok walking the path, as I continue on my own. Watching these videos really helps me deal with some of my own issues. Thank you, and him for his story.
I need to buy VR and make an appointment dude. You’re like the therapist of VR. THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO SHARES THEIR STORY AND THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE FOR PEOPLE WHO DON’T KNOW YOU.
Dude I've wanted to be interviewed for two/three years now. Ever since I watched the one about Aaron and the butterfly disease, I've wanted to talk about my own rare condition EDS and how painful it is, but I'm too anxious to even try lmao 🥲
I have a rare cardiovascular condition and this makes me so scared that one day this is going to happen to my wife. I don’t want to leave her or have her in this state of shock.
the way you let him just speak and how up front your questions are makes me wonder if you have grief counseling experience or are just naturally good at this...
MediumSea's story had me feeling very emotional...I'd probably be the same way if I lost my significant other...maybe even worse. That's why I try my best to make him happy and remind him that I love him and that he truly is important to me...may your wife rest in peace and may you find happiness in the times that are coming. Stay strong!
That very ending made me tear up, when he was talking about spend everyday loving that person since you never know when they will disappear. I've never had anyone die near me or I just didn't care as insensitive as that sounds, but at the moment I'm head-over-heels for the person I care about. And everyday I'm scared I'm going to lose them.
It actually really annoys me when people say this. You can't just say she is in a better place or that they will meet again. Because once you die that's it. Everything you have worked for is gone. This guys whole world has fell apart. When parents die it's different. They are meant to die before you but when someone you love so much and imagine yourself growing old together and watching your children grow up into adults. That would crush every aspect of your life. I know you meant well with saying she is in a better place but the reality is that his life has turned into hell because she is not with him anymore.
"Make sure.. every day is doing something to love that person" That hit me hard af. I couldn't handle this the way this man did. All my love goes out to you brother. I hope you're doing better now and are walking a happier path.
Dealing with death really abruptly is tough man, especially if it's your wife, I'm sorry. 2 weeks ago I was gaming with my friends and heard a commotion outside of my room. My roommate's daughter was going through like diabetic shock or something and my roommate was calling an ambulance. 5 minutes later they were screaming "she isn't breathing" and I performed CPR on her for about 4 minutes until the paramedics came. She didn't have a heartbeat when the paramedics came and they were never able to revive her. She was only 11 and my roommate is devastated. It all happened in like 10 minutes from when I got involved. I'm still not sure how to process everything. And I can't help but feel like there was something more I could've done but I don't think there was
I'm so sorry. I can't imagine what it's like, I hope you can come to terms with what happened. I don't have the right words to properly reach out, but I hope you have people to support you and your friend and that time will help you heal, even a little bit.
People always feel like they could've done more. Theres always a "could have" scenario in people's minds, but you cant dwell on it. The reality of the situation is that your contribution gave her a better chance than she would have had without you. Her condition would have occurred with or without you. She would have either have stopped breathing and not had CPR, or she would have stopped breathing and recieved CPR. Your help gave her the latter.
@@lorettabes4553 thank you so much. I went to my parents house to talk with them for a while. I'm trying to be there for my friend/roommate right now but he's really going through a lot
Tell your roommate that they tried their best sometimes they don’t come back.i feel so sorry for them that’s terrible she was so young.i wish them the best of luck.
This story reminds me of a comment of reditor "sometime when finding the one, you might have to accept that they could die before you" it's not exact. but the gist of it is there
The point of doing anything is to live on for her. Do stuff you guys wanted to do together, do stuff you love. Idk where we end up, but I'd like to think if we are able to watch over our loved ones, we would appreciate the little things they're doing to keep the memory alive.
Actually I feel like the opposite, I feel like if I died leaving loved ones on earth I would want them to move on, and not do things what we planned to do if I was alive because it just feels sad, and like trying to deny that you may not want to do that thing now that the person you planned to do it with is gone
I mean Im no therapist but this seems like awful advice. I just dont see how you could possibly live a fulfilling life if the core motivation of every action you take is to honor a dead person. Take your time to grieve, remember the person and how they changed your life, carry on the positive traits they gave you and move on. You shouldnt repress every memory you have of them, but you shouldnt dedicate your entire being to them either. Somewhere in the middle is a good spot.
@@pinguselen6771 who ever said it was their core? Y'all are taking it as me saying only live for them. I'm not. It takes time to move on and not many people want to, but in that time it is nice to remember the good things and take some time to do things you enjoyed with them. It helps the grieving process, but by all means take it how you want. No one is asking you to do it.
@@jonas8993 no one is saying they cannot move on. He was asking what the point of doing anything anymore was. I am saying she would want him to live a fulfilling life, and to do so would mean living through some of the things they'd of loved to do together and living the fullest because she no longer can. Do the things that made them happy and move at his own pace, but not to lose sight that she would want him to continue on. Especially being the loving helpful person she apparently was.
@@LolPixy yeah I get you :) , but don't get my first response wrong, I was just thinking that your first comment only mentioned doing things for the people you lost basically, and so I thought that, actually that may not be healthy in the long term, but then if you say now that you were talking the grieving process then we agree, in one hand people in this situation need to find motivation thinking about what their loved ones wanted, but also to move on from that after a while
Damn im crying listening to this. Me and my girlfriend of 2 years are long distance and i totally relate to how he explained that the relationship was kinda like a world we have together. It is exactly like that, Everything revolves around just us because we have always had just each other. I could never imagine losing the one person i want to live my life with. the person im making plans with. I want to give him a hug :((
I lost my brother this year and a lot of this rings true. The waking up thinking he’s there in his room. Some days going quickly and some slowly. Hopefully he gets something great in his life
Dude really has some balls of steel, talking about someone so important for him who passed away just weeks ago, there's things I can't get over and it's been years
I just lost my dad 2 weeks ago too.... I know it's not the same feeling, but I know a little bit about the pain. He passed away from a heart attack, he too was here a second and then he wasn't.
My dad passed away a year ago I know how you feel. I miss him like hell but I know he's not coming back and it's painful. I was upset because he missed my thirteenth birthday. 😞
I feel everything he is saying. He sounds like he is pretty emotionally strong but I guarantee he is going through hell everyday. I understand the feelings he has a hard time explaining. I hope he can figure out a way to live everyday with meaning and purpose and not feel guilty for being happy. None of our loved ones would want us to grieve their loss as long as we do. The pain never does go away you just deal with it
Same! I got so excited seeing his avatar because I have super nostalgic memories as well. Growing up we had a VHS with taped Christmas specials from a TV channel, and there was a 7Up commercial that I loved as a kid. Would love to support this guy!!
My heart goes out to you. My husband died 6 years ago and I still struggle with not having my best friend here. It’s hard when you have a success or failure and that person is the first one you want to tell, but then they aren’t there. It’s a devastating feeling. The thought of never seeing him again was too painful. So, I began telling myself I won’t see him today. That helped me get through the first year. The first 2 weeks after my husband died. I couldn’t think straight, my legs didn’t work right and I had pain in my chest all the time from heartache. Emotional pain, especially this deep, affect our bodies in a most unusual way. It is confusing and like living in a nightmare that you can’t wake up from. Things get easier over time as you learn to adjust, but the loss is always there. The saying that time heals all wounds is not true.
The best thing about these videos is that it makes you realise that the way you feel and think isn’t so stupid after all. Everyone is going through something no matter how big or small and everyone deals with it in their own way. There’s no right or wrong way to cope with certain situations and it’s settling to know that others have similar thoughts and feelings as you do during tough times
this sounds cheesy but hearing mediumsea talk about dissociating when he found his wife and feeling hollow afterwards struck something emotional in me. i've been there before and it's terrifying; i really hope he's able to find himself/his peace in the world with all of this.
I think displaying this normal kind of talking for men, specifically, is amazing. I’m so glad he opened up and let you share it. So many, many people will be helped by this. This is a gift in so many ways. Thank you so much for this
Everything he said about losing his wife is exactly how I felt about losing my mom. Same way as well, no warning, died in her sleep. We tried CPR but it was too late. They said it was a pulmonary embolism. I too find it difficult to open up about this with people. Only my closest friends know. I also cut some relationships after because those people didn't seem to really care about me anymore. You really do lose a part of yourself. But day by day, talking about it, thinking "she would want me to carry on and live out those dreams" helps. If she were a ghost watching she wouldn't want me stuck in place. For awhile I was, I struggled so hard everyday. Didn't help that the world out there didn't care - I still had to go to work, I still had to hand in assignments on time even tho I asked for extensions one lecturer didn't/couldn't give me one. It fucking sucked. And you do feel guilty about being happy even tho it's completely against what your loved one wanted. I lost interest in my hobbies, in my passions. I barely gamed at all, I stopped trying to make art etc. Slowly I dealt with it day by day even through all the setbacks. I started getting back into my hobbies. I started making more things, applying to more art comps, finishing games I had, going out more to concerts and events. It's been a much happier time. And it took years. I'll still cry when I remember her or talk about her sometimes. So it's an ongoing process. People deal with grief differently but this is something I'll be dealing with for awhile. Love your family, friends while you can and I wish this man well ❤️
This is 100% the best method of therapy and just flat out getting stuff off your chest that I’ve seen in so long, it eliminates the nervousness factor of being face to face with another human but still captures the calmness and trust that a deep conversation with a real human would hold. Amazing work I love this account 100% going to get VRchat because of your work!
My aunt’s boyfriend (pretty much my uncle) passed away just over a month ago now. She isn’t herself anymore. It really is a one day at a time kind of thing and I feel so much guilt that this poor guy has had to go through such a huge loss because I’ve seen firsthand how it affects someone. You’re amazing for opening up.
OH man that poor guy, I feel so bad for him. I lost my little sister like that. One night she went to sleep, the next morning my brother in-law woke up and she wasn't breathing, while in her mid-30's.
@Not Me She had a pulmonary embolism caused by a blood clot from elsewhere in her body as a side effect of diabetes. Possibly deep vein thrombosis in lower extremities.
When he mentioned how he had dreams about her being okay and then waking up and not having her there, I felt that. I recently lost someone extremely important to my life and I went through the exact same thing. Its painful and its tormenting but it gets better eventually
ive watched so many of these videos and none of them have made me cry. this story absolutely crushed me and made me break down. i just pray this man has the strength to continue on with his life and learns to find his happiness alone. fuck this one hurt
Last month my mother passed away due to brain cancer. I think we have went to the hospital 3-4 times, mainly because she collapsed and hit herself. The 4th time, the doctor said that the treatment hasn't been helping, and she might die soon. She was kind of the only reason of living, so it's kind of difficult to cope right now. Everything that i've done, like education and stuff was so my parents could live retirement easily, and not to work anymore. During treatment, we fell into debt. Things got even worse when this whole virus thing happened. During this time, my mom couldn't use her legs, since she was too weak to use them. After a few weeks of leg therapy, she completely lost the ability to move. All I saw was muscle spasms and tears. Spit was spilling from her face. She died peacefully next to me, my sister, and my dad on Easter Sunday. I still hate myself for everything ive done to her. Please spend time with people close to you.
Hearing him talk about waking up without her there broke my heart. Sir, wherever you are, I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope you heal and I hope you feel happy again.
I know how it feels to go to someone, and to vent to them your problems and emotions, I couldn't even start to imagine that going away. I have had someone that I knew from the beginning of my life, my friend. He shaped me as a person and I vent to them to this day. My life would end if they were gone forever. You gotta get through it. One day you might be that person. So stay strong, we are all with u
I just wanna give this guy a hug and tell him that everything is gonna be alright. If you are reading this stay strong man it will get better I promise.
They do, but their mouth movement is more simplified. Lip sync in VRChat is all about making different shapes for mouth for various sounds like uu, ii, S, etc, and the game just transitions between them or merges them. So it's completely up to creator. Someone who made the spot probably did very extreme mouth shapes for each sound, creators of more high poly avatars mostly try to not go extreme, to keep it within reality, and creators of meme avatars just skew faces in different positions and pin those to sounds, so it looks like the entire head is exploding whenever they say a thing....
Most high-end models are likely harder to work with as well. Some might be ripped from different places instead of being custom-made. I don't know the full extent of capabilities for VRChat or the way the models work but I'd assume it wouldn't be easy to just "make the mouth work" on any model you get your hands on.
@@Jackenack It depends more on how the model is made, rather than how complex it is. All you do is just shape face, you don't animate it directly. And if you know how to shape 8 vertex circle and set up shape keys, you should also know how to move around mouth. 99% of times its aesthetic choice. You wouldn't want cute anime loli with peanut sized mouth suddenly open it's mouth wide like my ex's asshole.
Mouth shapes that are associated with sounds rather than being captured from an actor's performance are called 'phonemes' and they're an animation shortcut. With a simple model like Cool Spot, there's not a lot to animate, so more budget (of resources and time) went to the lip sync. I'm pretty sure it's still using a phoneme-based system.
I can’t finish the video. The longer I am married to my wife the more I fear losing her. I can’t imagine the pain this man is going through. I really hope you are able to recover and find meaning for your life beyond this. Praying for him and anyone else that needs it.
I lost my partner like that in summer of 2019. One day she's there, I left for work kissed her good bye, and then she was gone before I went on lunch break, about 4-5 months before COVID hit. It also left me homeless, very shortly after. I spent a month cleaning up all the details of her life, the little footprints she left behind at home. I also had PTSD prior to that, so it triggered a long spiral of episodes down that path. Only just recently started to recover finally.
I truly wish I could meet this dude because he seems like such a nice guy and I feel awful for what has happened to him, I just would give him a tight hug.
As everybody is talking about this things...my grandpa died 2 years ago. The last time I saw him (it was 3 days before he passed away) he told me "I just wanna see you be successful I don't care what's your job as soon as you can live by yourself" (I've got a shitty job back then). So I'm kinda stuck overthinking about how to be successful. He did also asked me to not visit him in the hospital if he could not remember anyone (all his family died of alzheimer), so the first time my mother went to see him, she told me he was saying "yeah i do know who you are" but he was looking her like he didn't, my sister and my grandmother told me the same so I didn't go. I know he didn't recognize anyone but keep thinking "if he did and I didn't go to see him?" and it feels terrible even tho I know the answer is a no. Nobody knows he told me those things so everybody think I didn't go because I just didn't care since I don't like to talk about this kind of things and because I didn't cry on his funeral so everytime somebody tells me I didn't care, my chest break up on 200 pieces. That's it.
I couldn't imagine being in his shoes. I wanna give this guy the world. Thank you so much for doing stuff like this. These videos are life changing. ❤❤
Watching this because I saw the 2 years later video was posted and didn't want to see the original story after that one. I love your videos and what you do for people. You not only bring normality to people's lives, you entertain and you're like a therapist. You're a special person my friend.
From the bottom of my heart, I hope he can come to peace with what happened. I wish they were still together so we would never have to see this, and just not think that people like this have to go through this. My condolences man, stay strong.
I’ve lost my love my life a few months ago at the age of 19 I meet her when I was 15 and this story he’s talking about his wife just reminds me how close we were its actually hard losing her like I still don’t believe it at all she was like the only one who I trust I still talk to her and all that every night saying how much I love her
Man. This one is just heavy through and through. I myself don't know how to feel about it. The sudden aspect of that loss is just bewildering. There's no time to prepare. And in a place that you consider safe and comforting (home). My heart goes out to the guy. I can't say I understand what he's going through. However, I feel for him deeply.
his quote made me tear up, ive heard it a million times but never from someone that means it and has experience with it. thank you medium, I hope you get better.
"You are gonna carry that weight" ... That's the price of love... Losing someone and felling it, makes you think that if the felling did not existed, that person, your life with her, and the fact that she is not here anymore, makes you think a bit like that the person did not even existed.. I can't say that a know how he is felling, because even when my Grandmother died, it was normal, i knew that someday it was gonna happen, that is why i always hugged her and said that i love her.. That because i did not want to think after her being gone, that i regretted something with her..
I started crying watching this. I have been watching my grandmother go through this and so have I. My grandfather passed away in 2019 in the middle of summer in the middle of the night. In 6 months it will be 2 years but that hasnt made the loss any easier for her or me. And hearing this poor man have to go through this is just so upsetting. I hope he is able to remember the best and try to be happy because she would more than likely want him to be happy.
Had the same feeling when my ex gf broke up with me after 7 years together. It was a spiral of self destructive shit, drinking, chain smoking, pill popping etc. I didn't give a shit. I would hope he didn't do anything nearly as drastic. I hope he's doing better nowadays because he sounds very sensitive and what happened is so painful.
This probably the most heavy thing I have seen and heard in a very long time. Ever since I've started playing VRChat it's really brought out the side of me that I've wanted people to see. And I'm a firm believer that VRChat brings out what we hide or a side that we hide and be who we wanna be. And hearing this man talk about such a huge hardship that he's going through really solidifies my belief. It's incredible to watch your videos and get a glimpse into people's lives on a platform where people are comfortable in and I love watching these. It also reminds me how open I have become on VRChat myself about things in my life as well, so I have that connection watching these videos as well.
I really love these videos, man. The wonky juxtaposition of these goofy characters in these goofy places against the, quite frankly, very heavy stories they tend to tell. It's really great. Thanks for making these.
I tried my best to pay my respects to both mediumsea and his wife, I looked up at the sky for about 5 minutes and just said some stuff in my head. I hope mediumsea can make peace with it someday, you will be reunited one day. Now comes a big hug from me :)
Something I have started to notice about loosing someone close to you is just how sudden it can be and just how strange it can feel to have them just not be there anymore. Recently, I have been loosing a few people in my family in the last year or so. I lost my Aunt on my dads side and my most recently my grandmother on my moms side. That last one came extremely suddenly, one day I just got a text from my brother telling me she had Covid and decided to go into hospice and pass. This was after her death, so I didn't even get the chance to say goodbye. My grandmother is probably the only person in my family who I have nothing bad to say about. She was incredibly kind, caring and loving. I always imagined her as the one person who would never be gone, I could always go visit her whenever I wanted and she would always love me. Just trying to imagine her house empty just doesn't comprehend. It just feels so wrong. My aunt is always someone I loved to spend time with. Playing games, talking about dumb stuff for hours, watch a show together with her and my brothers, and all that. Every so often I see something on the internet or a show or something and I think to myself "Suzy would love this." knowing I can never show her what I want to. Them not being there has been a vary strange feeling. They are always there, until their just not anymore and you can never see them again. Me and my brother made some tamales a few days after hearing of her passing because she made them all the time for us, It was a childhood food for us. As I was eating them I had an overwhelming urge to call her and thank her for them. I felt like I could do that, but I knew I couldn't. That felt pretty bad. You really do need to spend time with those people while you still can, because they could just disappear out of nowhere. She called me and gave me her number and told me that if i ever wanted to I could call and talk. I never did, and that was the last time I ever got to hear her voice. I still have that voice message on my phone.
@@sci_pain3409 but in a sense of just hearing someone with a sad backstory and that there are people who take the time to listen to their story when most people just ignore their backstories.
9:03 Choked me up man. I hope this guy is doing better, I know it doesn't ever go away. For me with an experience similar to this, as in someone close to me passing away, it just kind of lingers, and then one day you're numb about it all. I wish him the best of luck in life.
Dude I completely feel for you man. I know what it's like brother. The fact that you can open up about it and share just shows real growth. I cant offer much but I do know your not alone.
We all love you mediumsea. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm bawling my eyes out bc I'm in a long distance thing right now and they just found out that her heart is having major issues and she might just drop. I haven't even met her in person but knowing that kinda wrecked me. I couldn't imagine how you feel right now.
this dude, this absolute lad takes the time out of his day to hop into VRChat to find people just so he can listen to them talk about their life... *+ R e s p e c c*
Last year, 2019 at october my grandmother passed away by kidney and liver failure , the night we got the news she passed away at the hospital my mother told me not to cry for her because she wanted someone strong that she can rely on when she is on a breakdown at her death bed so i did listen to her and wouldn't drop a single tear even i was one of the people that took care of her body at the morgue,whenever im alone in my room i would cry like a baby because my grandma have taken care of me my whole life, since her passing my mother would cry everyday and i had to be there for her to cheer her up even i had classes or have to do some work,a month have passed my mother went to the hospital because she had trouble breathing when she got checked she had hyper thyroid that grew a size of a golf ball, she was put into sleep by the doctors to help her rest and stabilize her heart rate yet all a sudden at midnight her heart stopped for 6 minutes,she was able to get back to life but she was already in a critical condition,she got put into a life support machine because she was low on oxygen and couldnt breath on her own,things got worst at the fifth day where she got into the ICU , her blood was thin as water while her kidneys and livers started to fail ,she havent show any signs of improvement since then , 2 doctors ask me to come with them in a room ,they told me my mother cant be saved and we have to pull the plug because her organs are failing and started to decay from the inside by an infection that they cant identify what kind of infection, i had to pull the plug on my mother and let her pass away rather than live in pain at the hospital bed and i had to take care of her body at the morgue with some family members ,burying her was the hardest thing I have ever done in my life ,not long after my mother passed away my mother's uncle that im close with passed away from brain cancer and i had to go through the same thing
Please love your family , that story was last year , this year 2 more of my family member passed away and i almost lost my girlfriend because of my mental health is unstable,the feeling of losing someone you love hurts you to your very existence
Stay strong man!!!! If you need to talk to someone I'm here for you!
Youre so strong omg. Thank u for these words and stay strong ♡ i lost a loved animal, and i cant believe how you go trough this so many times. much love♡
damn
I'm so sorry for you man, stay strong.
Keep strong especially in these times!
I want 7-up to hire him to play cool spot in the live action 7-up movie
You still looking for a girlfriend?
It could be like About Schmidt starring Cool Spot. In theory it shouldn't work as a film, and yet.....
Omg, it’s daddy dawa
I like your avatar
The resemblance is uncanny that's for sure
“Have you ever been this alone before?”
“Yeah before I met her”
Facts though lol
Fuck
Crazy 😭
Pain
Big hearts go out to MediumSea for opening up, stay strong everyone
So wait the 7 up guy found her dead ? I’m so confused they where dating online? And he just showed up can someone explain I watched this like 3 times
@@horizonfan They met each other online when they were younger and got married, and they were living with each other and he found her dead one morning.
LxstKxi dam :(
o7 v-v
@@horizonfan you watched it 3 times and didnt get it? kids, dont do drugs please.
7up: [beautiful dating story]
7up: "Two and a half weeks ago she, uh, she passed away."
Me: [Long inhale]
Like I started to cry when I heard it, I felt so bad, and hearing how much he loved her.
(I’m still crying 5 mins later)
“I keep having dreams where she’s ok, and I wake up and of course she’s not there.” That actually made me cry. Stay strong bro,,
Jesus that's depressing.
Those are the worst dreams, they bring the pain back so intensely. To have that moment of happiness again for a moment only to have it viciously taken away again. Same goes with the dreams where you have something you desperately desire in real life, then wake up and realize you're back in your shitty life and you have none of those things. Pretty soul crushing.
After 8 years my wife left. I kept having dreams for months that she was there. Every single morning when I woke up it was a split second of joy remembering the dream followed by extreme pain knowing she's gone. It's been 2 months and things do get better. It fucking sucks still and I'm still sad but I've been ok enough to go back into society. Everything I look at reminds me of her and our good times. It makes me happy to know that we shared so many good times together and that's what keeps me going.
deekamikaze I’m so sorry you had to go through that. hang in there man.
I hate those dreams. It’s like a living nightmare, I had them for like 2 years after my gf broke up with me and it was a really hard thing to deal with, obv not comparable to mediumsea’s experience but I guess I can say that I know - at least partially - what it feels like.
Two and a half weeks and he's keeping himself together like that? Exceptional emotional strength right there
A lil too much... it’s kinda weird that he’s that open about it.
@@bmx28kenilworth well I went through a similar scenario when my mother passed when I was 8 I watched her die as well and it’s burnt into my brain of that moment and even though I was going through the grieving process I was still able to openly talk about it without issue because I learned how to burden my emotions and let them all out at a better time than in-front of people which is probably what he is doing even 6 years later after my moms death it still effects me I have been growing less and less emotional as a person to the point where I can’t feel them anymore it’s like my body has a reaction like I’ll smile and laugh but my brain feels nothing no emotion I’m feeling yet im showing them
@@bmx28kenilworth people grieve in different ways. You say this is weird but who are you to judge how some one deals with a painful loss as tragic as this. I really admire him talking to us about it. A lot of people would just be done, but you ca tell through all the pain, he is still trying to make it through.
@@zvch330 Damn, I'm sorry that happened to you. I hope you're doing okay. Of course it would still affect you, you're only 14 and no one should have had to go through what you already have at that age. Based on your comment you seem like a very smart kid and if I may say, please talk to someone if you haven't already. Friends, family or maybe even a therapist/psychologist.
@@matthijsvanbeest5093 Thanks man
i jus wanna give him a hug. Its probably so hard not having closure about her death
You stole my name
Was literally about to type this, took the words right out of my mouth. I just want to hug him
@@elliotsmith8439 y cant we share
@@elliotsmith8439 these types of comments are so annoying, especially in this situation.
Same
The cracks from his voice is just a sign he's on the edge of crying for 5 hours straight
At first i thought the wife left him but then it got so much sadder when he said she passed.
@@leandrodamian707 to be fair, i made the same assumption reading the title not expecting a tragedy
Leandro Damián yo chill dont be so harsh.
@@leandrodamian707 domestic dispute
Was really hoping she left him
I didnt read the title of the video and i feel from my chair
I really felt that whole "I keep having dreams where she’s ok, and I wake up and of course she’s not there." part
One night last fall I had a dream that I woke up and called my Grandma, she asked how I was and made one of her friendly jokes about me sleeping in and how it was surprising that I was waking up early that day.
And then I really woke up, got my suit on and went to her funeral.
Losing someone that close, especially for the first time, you really learn to understand what other people feel in the same situation. I still have dreams like that. My Grandpa still cries at the slightest memory of her. They were together for 60 years. She was his highschool sweetheart. I was her first grandson. Obviously I wasn't as close as my Grandpa was to her but being the first and only grandchild for 8 years before my younger cousins were born I really got close to her, and that only made the event hit harder. I now have a more reformed, eternal sense of sympathy for things like this.
I lost my grandma who raised me since I was a baby (mom was a drug addict across the country and dad was a one night stand so idek a name) 7 years ago and my grandpa this year. Here and there i still get these weird dreams where I’m back home with my family and it’s just such a weird feeling in the dream and an even weirder feeling after waking up. Definitely makes me sad for the entire morning at least and most likely all day long.
I’m sorry that you have had to deal with a close death and I hope days are bright for you at points.
Everyone i know that has lost someone sees them a few days after their death where they because the best version of themselves and i strongly beleive that that is there soul coming to say a proper goodbye before leaving
Honestly I think one of the biggest pains in life is losing someone you thought you'd spend the rest of your life with.
Hope this guy makes it through all of that.
@weißer Ritter both of you are completely right.
this hit me man
It actually is on the second place (death of a spouse), out of 50 items, on the stress scale of Holmes and Rahe.
The only thing that is more stressful life event - is the death of a child.
Thats why a breakup, often has the same intensity as a death of a loved one, because your brain kinda deals with it the same way. I once wrote a paper about that and its very interesting topic.
Anyways, i wish the best for him. He sounds like a very collected and sweet person, whos goal was to just live in their own world.. Iam so sad for him :(
Stay strong, she will watch over you with a smile :)
I split up with my wife last year and it has been difficult adjusting to my plans and expectations for the future just being cancelled all of a sudden. We had to split up, we were not getting on. I took it upon myself to sort out and move out of our marital home, and find somewhere new to live. Then I made big mistake at work and got fired. So I had to move back home with parents. I feel bad for not trying harder to get back on my feet, but I also feel it’s necessary to give myself time to heal.
The Hardest Part Is Forgetting Those You Swore You Would Never Forget
I swear to god, I had a dentist when I was a kid, and the waiting room had an arcade in it, where that 7Up Cool Spot game was plugged into a Sega Genesis. I have never met anyone else who has played it, but I loved it.
I played the shit out of that game back in the day
I rented it a few times back in the day. I always thought Cool Spot was kinda cool for some reason too. Game was pretty solid too.
I beat that game.
Im sorry for his loss, I'm a 23 year old dude and I cried for 10 minutes
I'm 19, and really feeling the feels for this guy. I didn't cry but I really hope he's okay
@@lorettabes4553 god same :(
it's okay to cry. i cried too
Literally the same age. literally been crying for 9+ mins :/
He's gone through so much in just 23 years
The degree of connection MediumSea has with his wife is just astounding .The level of commitment they had for each other .They could only imagine a future where the other was there .I can only pray that all of us ( Who want it ) will have such a connection of pure unadulturated Love that the two of them had .And he loves her .And I wish him the best for all of his future .
I'm lucky enough to have found someone like that. I can only imagine the absolute heartbreak I would feel if something like this happened to her. I hope this guy is doing alright now.
Same here i have fpunf the person i want to spend literally every second of my life with and i cannot imagine it without her. I dont know what i would do if i lost her somehow i just idk we want to have kids and travel and go have so many experiences together. Shes my best friend i met her online on Kik and it was long distance still is for a little while longer once shes here itll be weird to be happy to have her here finally after 4 years of talking.
This became even harder hitting after seeing how much my grandfather suffered after losing my grandmother
This one hit me personally. Lost my partner just over six months ago. Everything this guy said is very familiar. That being said... he's only two weeks in and he's keeping himself together really well. He must be strong.
Hope he can push through. Cant imagine what is going on in his head.
I mean, I'm not in his or your shoes or anything, I just wanted to say that I've been dealing with depression and anxiety for the past 8 years and at some point the mask that I put on when I'm around other people got so strong that nobody would even notice when I have a full grown panic attack. What's going on outside and inside of you can be entirely seperate, at least that's how I experience it. I'm really sorry for your loss, and his too.
My heart goes out to you, I hope you’ve been dealing with it well. And mediumsea too.
Sometimes, there’s literally no tear left to cry and that’s the only time when you can vent and talk normal. Once your eyes get a little rest from all the tears and they build up again, it’s like a waterfall all over again. It’s like a dam breaking, then having to repair the dam and hold everything in and then the dam breaking again letting those tears and emotions come pouring out again.
I think he doesnt even realize right now but tbh I never lost someone like that so idk
Lost my wife and mother of my children in March. We were separated at the time, but for me that makes it worse: lots of unresolved stuff and questions left unanswered. I was there for the whole week in the ICU, as the family relay and I did everything I could: medical decisions, holding her hand and playing her favorite music when the time came, funeral arrangements, telling the kids...I kinda lost pieces of myself that week. It really takes a long time to get better. Relying on friends and family, even just virtually, helps a bit, but with the way things are now... Not being able to have the funeral, gather people together, get that closure, is extremely difficult to deal with. Everything he was saying about how it feels resonated with my experiences as well.
Hopefully, he's doing ok walking the path, as I continue on my own. Watching these videos really helps me deal with some of my own issues. Thank you, and him for his story.
im so sorry ❤️
God bless you brother, I'm Praying for your peace of mind.
I'm so sorry for you. Please take care of your mental health.
Wishing you the best! That takes a remarkable amount of strength!
Crying does not make you any less of a man, in fact, it shows that you have a good heart.
Thanks satan
thanks satan
Thanks, Satan.
Thanks Satan.
THANKS SATAN
I need to buy VR and make an appointment dude. You’re like the therapist of VR. THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO SHARES THEIR STORY AND THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE FOR PEOPLE WHO DON’T KNOW YOU.
Do you mean buy a VR headset?
@@PresidentGravy yep that’s probably what he means
@@ThatGuyFromThatPlaceOverThere I don't know why I asked that
Dude I've wanted to be interviewed for two/three years now. Ever since I watched the one about Aaron and the butterfly disease, I've wanted to talk about my own rare condition EDS and how painful it is, but I'm too anxious to even try lmao 🥲
I have a rare cardiovascular condition and this makes me so scared that one day this is going to happen to my wife. I don’t want to leave her or have her in this state of shock.
Just let them know you love them as much as possible. Take the time to be with them as much as possible.
Take care, stay positive and irradiate all the love you can!
Stay strong dude just live your life to the fullest
I wish you the best, cherish every moment with her. Everything will be okay.
Write a good will. Not in terms of material stuff but with emotional texts and update them
the way you let him just speak and how up front your questions are makes me wonder if you have grief counseling experience or are just naturally good at this...
MediumSea's story had me feeling very emotional...I'd probably be the same way if I lost my significant other...maybe even worse. That's why I try my best to make him happy and remind him that I love him and that he truly is important to me...may your wife rest in peace and may you find happiness in the times that are coming. Stay strong!
jakecool true but VR is still going strong! Hopefully he can find peace there for the time being
That very ending made me tear up, when he was talking about spend everyday loving that person since you never know when they will disappear. I've never had anyone die near me or I just didn't care as insensitive as that sounds, but at the moment I'm head-over-heels for the person I care about.
And everyday I'm scared I'm going to lose them.
I can tell the pain in his voice, Rest In Peace she’s in a better place now 🥺..stay strong dude .
Not really, you could tell how happy they were. I think the perfect place was with him
They will meet again, I wish the best for this guy
It actually really annoys me when people say this. You can't just say she is in a better place or that they will meet again. Because once you die that's it. Everything you have worked for is gone. This guys whole world has fell apart. When parents die it's different. They are meant to die before you but when someone you love so much and imagine yourself growing old together and watching your children grow up into adults. That would crush every aspect of your life. I know you meant well with saying she is in a better place but the reality is that his life has turned into hell because she is not with him anymore.
@@MysticalGB you might be a little too you to understand the saying
Zero Sorry should I edit my comment, I’m so sorry and I completely understand what your saying I just wanted to be positive
"Make sure.. every day is doing something to love that person"
That hit me hard af. I couldn't handle this the way this man did. All my love goes out to you brother. I hope you're doing better now and are walking a happier path.
Dealing with death really abruptly is tough man, especially if it's your wife, I'm sorry.
2 weeks ago I was gaming with my friends and heard a commotion outside of my room. My roommate's daughter was going through like diabetic shock or something and my roommate was calling an ambulance. 5 minutes later they were screaming "she isn't breathing" and I performed CPR on her for about 4 minutes until the paramedics came. She didn't have a heartbeat when the paramedics came and they were never able to revive her. She was only 11 and my roommate is devastated. It all happened in like 10 minutes from when I got involved. I'm still not sure how to process everything. And I can't help but feel like there was something more I could've done but I don't think there was
I'm so sorry. I can't imagine what it's like, I hope you can come to terms with what happened. I don't have the right words to properly reach out, but I hope you have people to support you and your friend and that time will help you heal, even a little bit.
People always feel like they could've done more. Theres always a "could have" scenario in people's minds, but you cant dwell on it. The reality of the situation is that your contribution gave her a better chance than she would have had without you. Her condition would have occurred with or without you. She would have either have stopped breathing and not had CPR, or she would have stopped breathing and recieved CPR. Your help gave her the latter.
@@lorettabes4553 thank you so much. I went to my parents house to talk with them for a while. I'm trying to be there for my friend/roommate right now but he's really going through a lot
@@bonusminutes thanks
Tell your roommate that they tried their best sometimes they don’t come back.i feel so sorry for them that’s terrible she was so young.i wish them the best of luck.
This story reminds me of a comment of reditor
"sometime when finding the one, you might have to accept that they could die before you"
it's not exact. but the gist of it is there
The point of doing anything is to live on for her. Do stuff you guys wanted to do together, do stuff you love. Idk where we end up, but I'd like to think if we are able to watch over our loved ones, we would appreciate the little things they're doing to keep the memory alive.
Actually I feel like the opposite, I feel like if I died leaving loved ones on earth I would want them to move on, and not do things what we planned to do if I was alive because it just feels sad, and like trying to deny that you may not want to do that thing now that the person you planned to do it with is gone
I mean Im no therapist but this seems like awful advice. I just dont see how you could possibly live a fulfilling life if the core motivation of every action you take is to honor a dead person. Take your time to grieve, remember the person and how they changed your life, carry on the positive traits they gave you and move on. You shouldnt repress every memory you have of them, but you shouldnt dedicate your entire being to them either. Somewhere in the middle is a good spot.
@@pinguselen6771 who ever said it was their core? Y'all are taking it as me saying only live for them. I'm not. It takes time to move on and not many people want to, but in that time it is nice to remember the good things and take some time to do things you enjoyed with them. It helps the grieving process, but by all means take it how you want. No one is asking you to do it.
@@jonas8993 no one is saying they cannot move on. He was asking what the point of doing anything anymore was. I am saying she would want him to live a fulfilling life, and to do so would mean living through some of the things they'd of loved to do together and living the fullest because she no longer can. Do the things that made them happy and move at his own pace, but not to lose sight that she would want him to continue on. Especially being the loving helpful person she apparently was.
@@LolPixy yeah I get you :) , but don't get my first response wrong, I was just thinking that your first comment only mentioned doing things for the people you lost basically, and so I thought that, actually that may not be healthy in the long term, but then if you say now that you were talking the grieving process then we agree, in one hand people in this situation need to find motivation thinking about what their loved ones wanted, but also to move on from that after a while
This is so sickly bittersweet. Like it hurts you in a suffocating way.
Damn im crying listening to this. Me and my girlfriend of 2 years are long distance and i totally relate to how he explained that the relationship was kinda like a world we have together. It is exactly like that, Everything revolves around just us because we have always had just each other. I could never imagine losing the one person i want to live my life with. the person im making plans with. I want to give him a hug :((
I lost my brother this year and a lot of this rings true. The waking up thinking he’s there in his room. Some days going quickly and some slowly. Hopefully he gets something great in his life
I cried when he said his wife passed away, may she rest in peace
Dude really has some balls of steel, talking about someone so important for him who passed away just weeks ago, there's things I can't get over and it's been years
I just lost my dad 2 weeks ago too.... I know it's not the same feeling, but I know a little bit about the pain.
He passed away from a heart attack, he too was here a second and then he wasn't.
damn.. that’s heavy.. stay strong.
@@sci_pain3409 thank you :)
I can’t think about losing anyone in my family it’s hard
My dad passed away a year ago I know how you feel. I miss him like hell but I know he's not coming back and it's painful. I was upset because he missed my thirteenth birthday. 😞
@@Vynarai I hope you two have many more years together :)
I feel everything he is saying. He sounds like he is pretty emotionally strong but I guarantee he is going through hell everyday. I understand the feelings he has a hard time explaining. I hope he can figure out a way to live everyday with meaning and purpose and not feel guilty for being happy. None of our loved ones would want us to grieve their loss as long as we do. The pain never does go away you just deal with it
I'll join the cool spot fan club!
I shall join aswell
Me three
Me four!
Same! I got so excited seeing his avatar because I have super nostalgic memories as well. Growing up we had a VHS with taped Christmas specials from a TV channel, and there was a 7Up commercial that I loved as a kid. Would love to support this guy!!
This doods cool. Hope he's doing ok
My heart goes out to you. My husband died 6 years ago and I still struggle with not having my best friend here. It’s hard when you have a success or failure and that person is the first one you want to tell, but then they aren’t there. It’s a devastating feeling. The thought of never seeing him again was too painful. So, I began telling myself I won’t see him today. That helped me get through the first year. The first 2 weeks after my husband died. I couldn’t think straight, my legs didn’t work right and I had pain in my chest all the time from heartache. Emotional pain, especially this deep, affect our bodies in a most unusual way. It is confusing and like living in a nightmare that you can’t wake up from. Things get easier over time as you learn to adjust, but the loss is always there. The saying that time heals all wounds is not true.
I literally can’t imagine the amount of dread he is going through, my heart goes out to him and anyone in the same situation
The best thing about these videos is that it makes you realise that the way you feel and think isn’t so stupid after all. Everyone is going through something no matter how big or small and everyone deals with it in their own way. There’s no right or wrong way to cope with certain situations and it’s settling to know that others have similar thoughts and feelings as you do during tough times
Syrmor kinda reminds of the midnight gospel with all the different interviews and vr chat avatars
Yeah, I was just thinking that.
I thought of Syrmor the first time I watched Midnight Gospel, I swear that show is based on these interviews.. There is no way it's not.
“But how? How do you cope, how do you move on from such a tragedy?
You cry. You cry. “
The Midnight Gospel.
I want him to know that, it is not only „okay“ to feel better somedays, but also important.
Exactly. It's what she would have wanted for him.
Just listening to him tell the story made me cry.. I can't imagine how he must be feeling, please stay strong.
this sounds cheesy but hearing mediumsea talk about dissociating when he found his wife and feeling hollow afterwards struck something emotional in me. i've been there before and it's terrifying; i really hope he's able to find himself/his peace in the world with all of this.
I think displaying this normal kind of talking for men, specifically, is amazing. I’m so glad he opened up and let you share it. So many, many people will be helped by this. This is a gift in so many ways. Thank you so much for this
Everything he said about losing his wife is exactly how I felt about losing my mom. Same way as well, no warning, died in her sleep. We tried CPR but it was too late. They said it was a pulmonary embolism. I too find it difficult to open up about this with people. Only my closest friends know. I also cut some relationships after because those people didn't seem to really care about me anymore. You really do lose a part of yourself. But day by day, talking about it, thinking "she would want me to carry on and live out those dreams" helps. If she were a ghost watching she wouldn't want me stuck in place. For awhile I was, I struggled so hard everyday. Didn't help that the world out there didn't care - I still had to go to work, I still had to hand in assignments on time even tho I asked for extensions one lecturer didn't/couldn't give me one. It fucking sucked. And you do feel guilty about being happy even tho it's completely against what your loved one wanted. I lost interest in my hobbies, in my passions. I barely gamed at all, I stopped trying to make art etc. Slowly I dealt with it day by day even through all the setbacks. I started getting back into my hobbies. I started making more things, applying to more art comps, finishing games I had, going out more to concerts and events. It's been a much happier time. And it took years. I'll still cry when I remember her or talk about her sometimes. So it's an ongoing process. People deal with grief differently but this is something I'll be dealing with for awhile. Love your family, friends while you can and I wish this man well ❤️
I’m so sorry about your mom, the day I lose my mom is the day everyone will lose me too , she’s all I have right now
This is 100% the best method of therapy and just flat out getting stuff off your chest that I’ve seen in so long, it eliminates the nervousness factor of being face to face with another human but still captures the calmness and trust that a deep conversation with a real human would hold. Amazing work I love this account 100% going to get VRchat because of your work!
His wife was such a big part of his life
Good point
My aunt’s boyfriend (pretty much my uncle) passed away just over a month ago now. She isn’t herself anymore. It really is a one day at a time kind of thing and I feel so much guilt that this poor guy has had to go through such a huge loss because I’ve seen firsthand how it affects someone. You’re amazing for opening up.
Hearing him talk about his wife made me cry , going through my own relationship issues the thought of losing the person you love is shattering
OH man that poor guy, I feel so bad for him. I lost my little sister like that. One night she went to sleep, the next morning my brother in-law woke up and she wasn't breathing, while in her mid-30's.
@Not Me She had a pulmonary embolism caused by a blood clot from elsewhere in her body as a side effect of diabetes. Possibly deep vein thrombosis in lower extremities.
@Not Me Thank you that's very kind of you 😊
When he mentioned how he had dreams about her being okay and then waking up and not having her there, I felt that. I recently lost someone extremely important to my life and I went through the exact same thing. Its painful and its tormenting but it gets better eventually
He shared the perfect relationship and has his whole life going for him. Gone overnight. I`m shaking
ive watched so many of these videos and none of them have made me cry. this story absolutely crushed me and made me break down. i just pray this man has the strength to continue on with his life and learns to find his happiness alone. fuck this one hurt
Last month my mother passed away due to brain cancer. I think we have went to the hospital 3-4 times, mainly because she collapsed and hit herself. The 4th time, the doctor said that the treatment hasn't been helping, and she might die soon. She was kind of the only reason of living, so it's kind of difficult to cope right now. Everything that i've done, like education and stuff was so my parents could live retirement easily, and not to work anymore. During treatment, we fell into debt. Things got even worse when this whole virus thing happened. During this time, my mom couldn't use her legs, since she was too weak to use them. After a few weeks of leg therapy, she completely lost the ability to move. All I saw was muscle spasms and tears. Spit was spilling from her face. She died peacefully next to me, my sister, and my dad on Easter Sunday. I still hate myself for everything ive done to her.
Please spend time with people close to you.
Hearing him talk about waking up without her there broke my heart. Sir, wherever you are, I’m so sorry for your loss. I hope you heal and I hope you feel happy again.
I know how it feels to go to someone, and to vent to them your problems and emotions, I couldn't even start to imagine that going away. I have had someone that I knew from the beginning of my life, my friend. He shaped me as a person and I vent to them to this day. My life would end if they were gone forever. You gotta get through it. One day you might be that person. So stay strong, we are all with u
I just wanna give this guy a hug and tell him that everything is gonna be alright. If you are reading this stay strong man it will get better I promise.
This jank avatar has fast lip syncing, why high polygon avatars have no mouth stuff?
I'm assuming because Cool Spot has a more simple mouth it's easier to work with?
They do, but their mouth movement is more simplified. Lip sync in VRChat is all about making different shapes for mouth for various sounds like uu, ii, S, etc, and the game just transitions between them or merges them. So it's completely up to creator. Someone who made the spot probably did very extreme mouth shapes for each sound, creators of more high poly avatars mostly try to not go extreme, to keep it within reality, and creators of meme avatars just skew faces in different positions and pin those to sounds, so it looks like the entire head is exploding whenever they say a thing....
Most high-end models are likely harder to work with as well. Some might be ripped from different places instead of being custom-made. I don't know the full extent of capabilities for VRChat or the way the models work but I'd assume it wouldn't be easy to just "make the mouth work" on any model you get your hands on.
@@Jackenack It depends more on how the model is made, rather than how complex it is. All you do is just shape face, you don't animate it directly. And if you know how to shape 8 vertex circle and set up shape keys, you should also know how to move around mouth.
99% of times its aesthetic choice. You wouldn't want cute anime loli with peanut sized mouth suddenly open it's mouth wide like my ex's asshole.
Mouth shapes that are associated with sounds rather than being captured from an actor's performance are called 'phonemes' and they're an animation shortcut. With a simple model like Cool Spot, there's not a lot to animate, so more budget (of resources and time) went to the lip sync. I'm pretty sure it's still using a phoneme-based system.
I can’t finish the video. The longer I am married to my wife the more I fear losing her. I can’t imagine the pain this man is going through. I really hope you are able to recover and find meaning for your life beyond this. Praying for him and anyone else that needs it.
My heart breaks for this guy. Stories like this always put one's own struggles in perspective.
He's very open about his grief, that is healthy and i'm sorry of what happened to that dude's wife. I hope he'll stay strong.
Prayers to you, MediumSea. I know if something like this happened to me, I wouldn’t be able to function or talk to anyone about it.
I lost my partner like that in summer of 2019. One day she's there, I left for work kissed her good bye, and then she was gone before I went on lunch break, about 4-5 months before COVID hit. It also left me homeless, very shortly after. I spent a month cleaning up all the details of her life, the little footprints she left behind at home. I also had PTSD prior to that, so it triggered a long spiral of episodes down that path. Only just recently started to recover finally.
stay strong brother
Rip, take it easy
better days are coming 🙏
This guy gives me a feeling of even though my day was hard his day was harder...
its not a competition, if you compare your day to his chances are you might feel bad about feeling bad. take care of yourself random internet person
Typo this
I truly wish I could meet this dude because he seems like such a nice guy and I feel awful for what has happened to him, I just would give him a tight hug.
This broke my heart. Thank you so much for sharing your story, MediumSea. ♥
As everybody is talking about this things...my grandpa died 2 years ago. The last time I saw him (it was 3 days before he passed away) he told me "I just wanna see you be successful I don't care what's your job as soon as you can live by yourself" (I've got a shitty job back then). So I'm kinda stuck overthinking about how to be successful. He did also asked me to not visit him in the hospital if he could not remember anyone (all his family died of alzheimer), so the first time my mother went to see him, she told me he was saying "yeah i do know who you are" but he was looking her like he didn't, my sister and my grandmother told me the same so I didn't go. I know he didn't recognize anyone but keep thinking "if he did and I didn't go to see him?" and it feels terrible even tho I know the answer is a no. Nobody knows he told me those things so everybody think I didn't go because I just didn't care since I don't like to talk about this kind of things and because I didn't cry on his funeral so everytime somebody tells me I didn't care, my chest break up on 200 pieces. That's it.
She definitely sounds like his twin flame, such a strong connection.
I only just started watching these yesterday, but I have never seen a better use of a platform
Same. Just found the channel last night
I couldn't imagine being in his shoes. I wanna give this guy the world. Thank you so much for doing stuff like this. These videos are life changing. ❤❤
Watching this because I saw the 2 years later video was posted and didn't want to see the original story after that one. I love your videos and what you do for people. You not only bring normality to people's lives, you entertain and you're like a therapist. You're a special person my friend.
Cool Spot has lived one heck of a life.
He could use some 7-Up
Cool spot said he doesn't like 7-up
From the bottom of my heart, I hope he can come to peace with what happened. I wish they were still together so we would never have to see this, and just not think that people like this have to go through this. My condolences man, stay strong.
That’s so heartbreaking. I hope he finds a way to deal with everything and be happy
I need to say thank you to him. I was thinking about ending it, but you made me think about how my girlfriend would feel, so thank you.
this man kins cool spot what a champ
I’ve lost my love my life a few months ago at the age of 19 I meet her when I was 15 and this story he’s talking about his wife just reminds me how close we were its actually hard losing her like I still don’t believe it at all she was like the only one who I trust I still talk to her and all that every night saying how much I love her
Man. This one is just heavy through and through. I myself don't know how to feel about it. The sudden aspect of that loss is just bewildering. There's no time to prepare. And in a place that you consider safe and comforting (home). My heart goes out to the guy. I can't say I understand what he's going through. However, I feel for him deeply.
his quote made me tear up, ive heard it a million times but never from someone that means it and has experience with it. thank you medium, I hope you get better.
"You are gonna carry that weight" ... That's the price of love... Losing someone and felling it, makes you think that if the felling did not existed, that person, your life with her, and the fact that she is not here anymore, makes you think a bit like that the person did not even existed.. I can't say that a know how he is felling, because even when my Grandmother died, it was normal, i knew that someday it was gonna happen, that is why i always hugged her and said that i love her.. That because i did not want to think after her being gone, that i regretted something with her..
I started crying watching this. I have been watching my grandmother go through this and so have I. My grandfather passed away in 2019 in the middle of summer in the middle of the night. In 6 months it will be 2 years but that hasnt made the loss any easier for her or me. And hearing this poor man have to go through this is just so upsetting. I hope he is able to remember the best and try to be happy because she would more than likely want him to be happy.
"What is the point of doing anything now".
Wow. I feel so bad for this man. I hope telling the story helped him a little.
Had the same feeling when my ex gf broke up with me after 7 years together. It was a spiral of self destructive shit, drinking, chain smoking, pill popping etc. I didn't give a shit. I would hope he didn't do anything nearly as drastic. I hope he's doing better nowadays because he sounds very sensitive and what happened is so painful.
This probably the most heavy thing I have seen and heard in a very long time. Ever since I've started playing VRChat it's really brought out the side of me that I've wanted people to see. And I'm a firm believer that VRChat brings out what we hide or a side that we hide and be who we wanna be. And hearing this man talk about such a huge hardship that he's going through really solidifies my belief. It's incredible to watch your videos and get a glimpse into people's lives on a platform where people are comfortable in and I love watching these. It also reminds me how open I have become on VRChat myself about things in my life as well, so I have that connection watching these videos as well.
When he started talking about the world they created together, man I started sobbing
I really love these videos, man. The wonky juxtaposition of these goofy characters in these goofy places against the, quite frankly, very heavy stories they tend to tell. It's really great. Thanks for making these.
I tried my best to pay my respects to both mediumsea and his wife, I looked up at the sky for about 5 minutes and just said some stuff in my head. I hope mediumsea can make peace with it someday, you will be reunited one day. Now comes a big hug from me :)
Something I have started to notice about loosing someone close to you is just how sudden it can be and just how strange it can feel to have them just not be there anymore.
Recently, I have been loosing a few people in my family in the last year or so. I lost my Aunt on my dads side and my most recently my grandmother on my moms side. That last one came extremely suddenly, one day I just got a text from my brother telling me she had Covid and decided to go into hospice and pass. This was after her death, so I didn't even get the chance to say goodbye. My grandmother is probably the only person in my family who I have nothing bad to say about. She was incredibly kind, caring and loving. I always imagined her as the one person who would never be gone, I could always go visit her whenever I wanted and she would always love me. Just trying to imagine her house empty just doesn't comprehend. It just feels so wrong. My aunt is always someone I loved to spend time with. Playing games, talking about dumb stuff for hours, watch a show together with her and my brothers, and all that. Every so often I see something on the internet or a show or something and I think to myself "Suzy would love this." knowing I can never show her what I want to. Them not being there has been a vary strange feeling. They are always there, until their just not anymore and you can never see them again. Me and my brother made some tamales a few days after hearing of her passing because she made them all the time for us, It was a childhood food for us. As I was eating them I had an overwhelming urge to call her and thank her for them. I felt like I could do that, but I knew I couldn't. That felt pretty bad.
You really do need to spend time with those people while you still can, because they could just disappear out of nowhere. She called me and gave me her number and told me that if i ever wanted to I could call and talk. I never did, and that was the last time I ever got to hear her voice. I still have that voice message on my phone.
I hope he’s able to cope okay since he has no friends he so sweet my heart physically hurts for him may she Rest In Peace ☹️
Man this is a good channel...everyone opening up and talking about their problems...makes me feel like im not alone
these videos are the true meaning of wholesome. not videos of your cute animal crossing villagers
ah of course, talking about losing your wife, how wholesome.
@@sci_pain3409 but in a sense of just hearing someone with a sad backstory and that there are people who take the time to listen to their story when most people just ignore their backstories.
9:03 Choked me up man. I hope this guy is doing better, I know it doesn't ever go away. For me with an experience similar to this, as in someone close to me passing away, it just kind of lingers, and then one day you're numb about it all. I wish him the best of luck in life.
I could actually hear him breaking during some of the interview. Stay strong man
Dude I completely feel for you man. I know what it's like brother. The fact that you can open up about it and share just shows real growth. I cant offer much but I do know your not alone.
"I kind of feel like a shell"
*INTENSE EXHALE*
This made me cry not even lying I felt his pain through he's words and honestly I feel numb this is the first time a yt vid has made me cry...
She lives on through you.
this made me sob
We all love you mediumsea. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm bawling my eyes out bc I'm in a long distance thing right now and they just found out that her heart is having major issues and she might just drop. I haven't even met her in person but knowing that kinda wrecked me. I couldn't imagine how you feel right now.
I just want to give the man a hug...
this dude, this absolute lad takes the time out of his day to hop into VRChat to find people just so he can listen to them talk about their life...
*+ R e s p e c c*