Actual therapist here. Alex behavior in this is why people are so iffy about therapy. To be a licensed mental health professional and not be able to let the word insane go is wild. We meet people where they are, not inflict our own discomforts on them.
And also there's nothing wrong with saying "This is insane" in regards to some abstract situation, and she made her go back and replace the word. It goes without saying, that this is just an intentional hyperbole. I was in therapy with 5 different doctors and there were some unprofessional ones but her behavior's just odd and kinda uncomfortable to me.
as a therapist myself, and a huge fan of this podcast, this was the only episode that I couldn’t finish because the therapists inability to let you speak was so upsetting. to me, this felt very much like her wanting to demonstrate her insights and not so subtly share her own opinions. I hope in time she grows the confidence to sit back and let her training speak for itself so that she doesn’t feel so compelled to constantly fill the void or interrupt those in dialogue with her.
if she's a "licensed social worker" does that even make her a therapist? i don't really feel like she is professional, she seems like she would work with teens and people with teenage mentality and that's all she could probably handle in terms of how far her abilities go for helping people...
it's not really her "personal opinion," though... she's a guest because she is a credentialed LCSW. she knows the difference between clinically insane and "insane" in colloquial usage, but not *everyone* does. i think she was well within her knowledge & experience to discuss the technically correct usage of the term. it seemed like it was just a pet peeve of hers when folks misuse words like crazy, insane, psychotic, etc., and that seems fine lol we all have our own weird little quirks and frustrations over seemingly silly things 🙃
Not only the therapist is showing a great deal of passive judgement, but also deep-rooted insecurity. I love how Dev stood up for herself so naturally and was so patient and eloquent when faced with such rude behaviour. (there's no way her two previous therapists were worse than this one, ick)
So let me get this straight, a social worker claiming to be a legit therapist goes on a podcast called “we’re all insane” and proceeds to take offense of the word “insane”. Then proceeds to be passive aggressive about her judgement of the host and one of her jobs. While also interrupting her constantly. With a dash of random gaslighting and having some clear narcissistic traits. This lady should not be working in mental health she’s insane.
The way she “asks” questions, but in the question has a blatant opinion. It’s enraging. She is lacking social etiquette. She’s not truly listening to Devs answers, she’s interrupted every sentence, finishing most sentences for her. “Is there and and coming.” She’s trying to direct the conversation in the way she wants it to go, you can see she rehearsed these questions and responses. 😅
That's how therapy works... she was leading the conversation to give it coherent form and structure so that Dev would have a followable train of thought and specific insights to pull from the conversation. You have no idea what you're talking about.
this lady is the most insufferable guest you’ve had on here😭 she was all over the place, refused to let the conversation flow, and was annoyingly condescending towards you
@sarahalderman3126 except she's not. She corrected Dev when Dev was correct. You can have both schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. It's schizoaffective disorder. That's not all, but that's a major one. Also part of her job
My therapist never interrupts me. Saying "ok" "mmhmm" is not giving me listening skills. Making noises while someone is talking drowns out certain details when someone else is talking. It gives corporate meeting vibes. She must either like talking or she has so many clients that she is used to getting people to the point under 1 hr time slots. Move them in and hurry to ship them out.
I don't believe Devorah is a therapist. Last I knew she worked in law enforcement and had an OF page of her own with plenty of nude and revealing content.
most of the people in this field are so frustrating like i can't believe someone tried to diagnose Dev with adhd and put her on pills after one fucking session it's disgusting. pathologizing normal human behaviour is a disease in itself that spread through colonialism
@@Gorl-rilla lol what a therapist is never going to cure anything they are going to help you navigate your emotions and feelings about any number of topics. You don't just cure people by talking to someone that's ridiculous
Or to help her realize that she is in fact degrading herself (and women in general). I get the instinct to protect our faulty beliefs but reality is reality.
Honestly Alex was annoying. Changing topics , interupting Dev while shes actually trying to hold a conversation rather than doing a q&a, her tone was more condescending than anything else.asking silly questions, the use of the word "insane" like common , drop it 😒
I think she was trying too hard to make herself look like a good podcast co host 💀 I literally thought the same thing… like stfu when other people are talking.
Well imo I think it’s because dev says something that alex wants to touch on before they continue talking more. There’s a certain way dev words something she’s saying, and the social worker is trying help her understand a more positive way that she could think about it. Or replace words that could be turned from negative to positive. Dev is really good at talking I feel like she could keep going on and on. It’s better to touch on it right away than have to go back and point out all the things. If that makes sense. I respect your pov just wanted to share mine (:
@@arim.3304 I completely agree with you! Alex wasn't interrupting to be rude, she just wanted to correct certain words in the moment, cause like you said, it's easier than trying to remember that to go back to while also trying to be an active listener.
I really wish the guest would let Dev finish her sentences. It was pretty unprofessional and seemed like a way of trying to control the narrative rather than letting someone feel like their voice matters. I truly enjoy Devs podcast. She is a natural at hosting and leads conversations so well while giving space for guest to share. It’s hard to come by and I appreciate this podcast so much. Hopefully future guest will continue to show her the respect she deserves ❤
@juliana o She mentioned that she has anxiety ,and this is how it can manifest itself!( interrupting the person who is talking even when you want to listen) it's can also be a trauma response
@@Anna-rv3fv she didn't intend to be rude ,that's how she is ,how her trauma issues manifest.She was trying best to be kind, compassionate and understanding. maybe over eagerly trying to be helpful in this interview
@noebar I personally can relate, and feel like a dingus when I realize I'm doing it, but it's part of my personality so it happens constantly. Yes it annoys some, but a good amount of people see my eagerness and my attentiveness. It's important to me that people feel listened to since I often don't feel listened to. I am more animated and actually act interested, just overtly so 😅 my mom was like this too. Hopefully I'll be better at making it less annoying as I get older.
This conversation almost makes me want to hurl because Alex’s questions sounds as if they are almost intentionally framed around to forcefully shame Dev
Because women dont see why they end up in these industries besides "they want too". Its not good for society, and its not coming from mentally healthy People.
Kind of the opposite, when dev said “he cheated on me with a stripper” seems like she separates herself from sex workers like she’s above them while also being one
@@ashlove555 Got the same impression. Was kind of stressed watching their interaction. She needs to take it slower and let Devorah unpack her own explanations in more depth.
Kinda funny how Alex’s first “teaching point” is that therapists either have their own agenda for the session or their approach is to let their client take the lead. Then she proceeds to interrupt, change direction of the conversation, etc., throughout the whole conversation!!! LOL 😂😂😂. She seems to love hearing her own self talk-at the expense of the person trying to tell their story. That’s a shame. As others have mentioned, active listening and being able to control your own impulses to interrupt and control the interaction are two of the most important skills of a successful counselor, therapist, social worker, doctor, etc. Alex seems super hyperactive throughout the session and either doesn’t understand the importance of letting the person talk or just cannot control herself from interrupting-in which case, she should learn how to manage that before trying to counsel vulnerable people. She seems either very inexperienced or just egotistical with a deep need to control the interaction.
I was going to say, I would call her out within a first session with her; as I have a set thing I'm trying to lay out and tell you. I'm incredibly self aware and know exactly what I want to say and THEN we can ask all the questions after. but this woman just trails the conversation into a completely different path. she seems to be incredibly new and unexperienced in general life interactions as well as self important with the way she couldn't let someone reach their own conclusion.
She's constantly interrupting you, I don't see how she would treat patients if she can't let you finish and constantly finishes your sentence, shouldn't she know that's the last thing you should do? I've watched a few episodes and you do a much better job listening and asking appropriate questions at the right time than a trained professional.
"WoAh LeT'S TaLk aBoUt It" If she's actively trying to therap Dev in this episode she is showing her ass. Feels like she's over compensating to show that she's a therapist and failing miserably (I'm a therapist and have THOUGHTS). Also her over use of "notice" is just a classic tell that she's trying realllllllly hard.
When she asked you if you were proud, she squinted her eyes while doing that, it’s a sign of distaste, it means subconsciously that she disapproves, whether she knew it or not. I have 3 psychology degrees. I know this lol. She wasn’t being helpful, she was being condescending
@@radreynolds8978 Projection is a psychological defense mechanism in which individuals attribute characteristics they find unacceptable in themselves to another person. This white girl did just that. She couldn’t fathom being “secksually” explicit for money & was judging Dev for doing just that. Sounds like your projecting and offended that a young 23 year old woman has 3 Psychology degrees and you don’t.
@@natalia_renteria_ I'm happy that you are educated but it sounds like they may be diploma mill degrees because (am I wrong here?) afaik one of the first things you learn studying it is that you should be careful with psychoanalysing individuals randomly in informal circumstances and that surface level shit like "people break eye contact when they lie" is worth jack. No?
Please give another therapist a shot ….& make a second video. I would have loved to have learned more about you! I think the issue was, that she reached out to you, she wanted to be in your spotlight for a second. Shows that not everyone with a degree in this field is actually helpful …. I think you should pick someone & reach out to them.
Even when Dev was just answering her questions, the amount of yeahs, ooohs, okays, and all the other side commentary was so unnecessary and annoying and added so much distraction. Just shut up and let her answer.
Alex sounds like the worst social worker / therapist. She literally interrupts Dev every single time she speaks. Mainly full blown interruptions. Sometimes just with loud yes's or quick remarks. Awful! her ego is so huge that she feels so important that she has to have control of each part. Shes not actually listening, just guessing what Devs answer will be and going onto another question before the answer. What a disgrace
Insanity is not just a term used for mental illness. Oxford: "Extreme foolishness or irrationality", Einstein: "Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results." It was a blanket term used in the medical field back when specific disorders weren't as researched and labeled as they are now. Now it's probably used more as a descriptive layman term than a diagnosis. All this to say, I don't think the podcast name is insensitive to those with mental illnesses.
this!! words like crazy, insane, wild are blanket terms that have general connotations. the words themselves don't solely refer to mental illness, so imo it's not insensitive or false to use those words as descriptive laymen's terms. and if you want to argue that it's insensitive to people that have or have experiences with mental experience, then under that argument, literally EVERY SINGLE word would be considered insensitive/triggering/etc to people who have had negative experiences relating to something a word can describe....
Yeah like she doesn't get she's in entertainment and a lay person but is expected to make the professional feel comfortable and interested in her rather than the other way around....yall this woke culture is ruining every profession like come on don't be a softy snow flake we like in the real world and must cope manage and care for ourselves in the real world but with self serving therapy is annoying like come on help me if I'm paying $$$$$ this is why nobody trusts them or I'll just rant and talk to friends and Podcaster lmao the real down in the dirt mf
I honestly think you would make an excellent therapist Dev. You're naturally an active listener and also I bet you are very interested in studying the mind. You're intelligent, well-spoken, non-judgemental, warm and a great host of this amazing podcast. I think you and Julie reach excellence in every episode. Been here since 2019. Love you and I'm happy for you.
Therapists are not your friends and are not usually there to sit and let you talk about random things that come to your head. Most of the time, the goal is to see if you are a danger to yourself or others, see if there is an underlying mental disorder that needs to be diagnosed and treated and get you the correct prescription. With that out of the way, they may look for your trauma triggers, daily stressors and responses, give you advice to manage these or simply help you understand the problems you have. This style of "tell me how you feel" sessions are more or less pointless. Get a friend, a pet or talk to the wall and save your money. Also, when a therapist is looking for triggers they will ask hard questions. Some people have complex trauma and they may need time before they are fully ready to answer them.
I could only watch a couple minutes. The overuse of “mmmm” and “yeah” as if she’s listening but is obviously rushing to speak and cutting you off drove me crazy! Completely unprofessional. She may be an okay “free friend therapist” but the fact she’s licensed?!
also a bit concedending and i felt icky with how she phrased a few things - ALSO let someone use the words they want to use, it seemed that the term insane was a trigger for her, but she should understand that dev uses it differently and just let her be
I was really inspired by the way Dev communicated. She held space, was selfless, present and educated. She asked for consent and showed gratitude repeatedly and kept the topic on track in a kind and gentle way and really created an amazing container for this topic to be explained that can so easily go on forever.
Love this episode because of the topics that were touched on and what Dev shared. But at the same time the guest tried to take too much control of the convo and interrupted Dev a lot. It rubbed me the wrong way that she wanted to change her vocab so much, why does she need to control how people express themselves just because it offends her and doesn’t suit her lifestyle. Her job shouldn’t dictate how others talk and other people don’t have to talk all politically correct to appease you. Loved Devs transparency and shared experiences I also do think the guest has a good voice for podcasts.
I didn’t get that vibe from her at all. I really feel like she was a very good listener and has such a loving personality. I think she’s just trying to show how small things like changing the “but” to an “and” can have positive affects on life idk
Weird that she said someone can't have bipolar and schizophrenia at the same time, my uncle was diagnosed with both, and I hope she touches more on that if she comes back on.
It’s correct to say that one shouldn’t be *diagnosed* with both conditions at once, though it does happen in practice. However, the reason is because the two conditions together are called Schizoaffective Disorder. Sometimes there will be a schizophrenia diagnosis and bipolar disorder diagnosis because they were diagnosed by two separate clinicians at different times, and perhaps both conditions have not been substantiated by the same one clinician. Whenever they have been, the diagnosis should be changed to schizoaffective disorder.
It’s a different form of communication called “cooperative overlap”: “In cooperative overlap, two friends may very well be talking simultaneously, hashing over ideas in a freeform manner. They are informally overlapping as a way of brainstorming. Cooperative overlap can be sharply contrasted with interrupting because of a simple fact: It is not competitive. Both talkers are working on a similar goal in conversation, problem-solving, bonding, or moving toward shared understanding.”
lol the guest has a rigid way of interpreting things. when i read "we're all insane" its obvious to me that its a joke implying something to the effect of 'no matter what we are going through, we're not alone in our problems.' most of the guests on this podcast have opened up about deeply vulnerable things in their lives and that gives the viewers something to relate to. i suppose someone unfamiliar with the channel couldn't have known that. on the other end, Alex seems to have little regard for other people's capacity to judge. maybe it's due to her job, but she was quick to assume devorah is just clueless and needs to be corrected, when really her own understanding is what needs work.
my thoughts exactly! I think its an over exaggeration, it's really not that deep. people use all kinds of terms loosely, I mean when did we get this sensitive over minor things
Alex keeps talking over you. It’s soooo annoying. She keeps asking and making confirmation sounds while you’re speaking every second.. it gave me so much anxiety watching this. Lol Dev you’re such a trooper 😂❤
I kept getting irritated she only talked about herself and interrupting like it’s all about her ! The host decided to interview another person so interview the guest instead of yourself , she mine as well just b alone asking herself questions. Couldn’t make it passed 30 mins tops
Lord Jesus lol could not watch this episode comfortably! Alex seems like she cares more about looking knowledgeable and spewing info at every moment to prove she knows so much instead of activelyyyy listening to Devorah! I learned from my program that active listening is one of the most important things a social worker, counselor, therapist, etc. should practice! 😅😩
It did seem to be listening actively, and reassuring her. She’s making sure that she understands her. And helping not go into defense mode, and helping her see why she’s doing things she’s doing.
I really liked the podcast mostly because of Dev. I feel like the guest is quite biased. She is really uptight and very curious of Dev’s life but not coming from a “trying to understand Dev and discovering her point of view” more like “I wanna make an opinion on her” “judge her” I don’t really appreciate those kind of personalities. ❤
@@leona4951 Yeah! I believe it's very important to be empathic, people in those situations usually are scared and can't find comfort so as a social worker you have to try to be understanding and empathic not act controlling and condescending.
In add: Also, the name of the podcast it's imo well chosen. It's relatable and fun, why would anyone feel bad about it. It's a form of accepting the fact that we all have our down/weird/crazy moments. We are all humans with emotions.
I can see why you may say she is bias but I also think that she is maybe trying to help dev dig deeper. Dev said only fans lately had made her super depressed so the social worker starts asking dev questions about OF that makes her have to think more deeply about why she might be feeling that way. Is it because she had low self esteem, wasn’t proud, uncomfortable from the messages etc. Instead of trying to claim a reason, she provides possible view points and allows dev to think it though… in psychology there is a socratic view of asking “why”. For example, when a patient mentions something that is bothering them, the counselor may ask questions to help the person try to see why/what is making them feel that way. I’m not saying I agree or disagree that Alex had a bias, just kinda playing devils advocate to your statement that she was bias or judging dev
I love how she’s making her say things differently cause she doesn’t like it.. she can say but and insane if she wants. This girl is actually pretty annoying and I never want to see any kind of therapist after this. Chick must be a control freak.
Lol you can still go to therapy. Trust me I’m a first year in my psyD and they teach us immediately to never give advice or interrupt or be judgy. This social worker is just confused
I've been an OF creator since 2020 and I relate so much. At first I loved it, it gave me so much independence and freedom. Now it feels honestly horrible. The abuse and misogyny you encounter on a daily basis eventually wears you down. And yes about the sense of purpose. It feels like everyone around you is driven by something deeper and you're falling behind. Thank you for talking about this.
“Freedom” of what? It’s 2022, women are equal to men. I don’t know how showing your vagina to the world is “freedom”. You made your choices so take accountability. You didn’t have to be a hoe in order to make money.
Anddddd this is why in my program my professors told us to be okay with silence, bc this therapist is doing too much 😭 like omg let her talk!!! I feel terrible for her clients
I don’t know who this guest is, but she was so beyond disrespectful towards Devorah. It seems like she is actively trying to embarrass her, but Dev’s level of confidence is too high for it to work. I feel uncomfortable listening to the guest purely just talk. She didn’t come on the podcast with right ful intentions. She’s trying to prove she is knowledgeable and cares about people, but just comes across as belittling others. I don’t know where Devorah found her.
yeah that's how it should be with a professional but I thought Devorah was the one interviewing Alex.... but it was just a weird disjointed back and forth conversation on a thousand topics
I once had a therapist like her and I only went one time, she was annoying and you can tell that she’s so inexperienced as a therapist just bc she knows “stuff” doesn’t mean she knows how to connect w ppl no matter how hard she tries.
I wish you would not date F boys. I can see a great future with you. Just gotta switch up the type of guys you go after. Find a wholesome bluecollar midwestern man.
“Are you proud that you did OnlyFans?” Well, Alex…Dev is doing a legitimate job for money to pay her bills and be a responsible person. So the fact that you think a relevant question is “are you proud of it?” shows that you are being judgmental-otherwise why would you ask that question? You wouldn’t ask a person that question about other legitimate jobs, so why ask about this one. Dev already made it clear that she had no moral dilemma with being an OnlyFans creator, so the question really stands out as condescending and judge-y! If the question is coming from a place of concern, why not ask instead if her (legitimate) job presents any challenges to her wellbeing?
There's only an issue with her asking it like that if you think there is shame around it. It's completely normal to ask when the fact is a lot of people do it but do regret it or feel shame. Some people love it , some people do it and regret it . Its just an honest question
Only fans is NOT a legitimate job. nor does it indicate a responsible person-lets be real here. It's one of the most sleazy treacherous things she can do as a woman to help collectively devalue the role of women and our sexuality in society by participating in pornography. Shame on all women who do this and make it so much harder for women with morals and self-respect in 2023
@@yeetnama9094 your opinion of it being a "sleazy treacherous" thing does not change the fact she provides a service in exchange for money, making it a job. No matter how sad and angry you are, your feelings don't change the fact it is a job.
As someone with hyper sexuality and daddy issues her saying “oh so that’s like who you are” is so annoying and triggering because NO my sexuality and coping skills are NOT who I am, and it’s not who dev is. How is this woman even a therapist
I agree with quite a bit of what Alex had to say about mental illness, but as someone with bipolar 2 who's experienced a manic episode with psychosis because of ssris, I would definitely not describe bipolar 2 as a ''calm wave'' or even mild comparatively. People diagnosed with bipolar 2 tend to have more depressions than bipolar 1 and hypomanias rather than manias. It can be equally and sometimes more disabling. The key difference in diagnosis is the severity of the high state. But i really liked this episode, just wanted to mention that. Really love this podcast, dev! Thank you!
I’ve never watched a video with so much word gatekeeping! Gatekeeping the words “insane” and “crazy” okay, fine. Still a little weird. BUT making a big deal and interrupting Dev about the word BUT?! Was that serious?! Just let Dev speak and tell her story how she’s sees fit!!! Sometimes you don’t have to see things in the most positive light! Sometimes things are great BUT some things aren’t. It’s okay to acknowledge the negative side of things as negatives. Disregarding them as negatives doesn’t change that they’re a negative.
OMG.... We have a therapist and we have someone who loves to talk about themselves. This is also the one episode where we would REALLY get to know Dev. What did we get instead??? Interruptions galore. I can't tell you how many times I said "Geez, let her speak".
For anyone who is questioning about her diagnosis and stating you can’t be diagnosed with both things at once please be advised she’s just a social worker and should not be making diagnosis outside of her qualifications… extremely unprofessional.
This guest is awful. I think she has deep routed issues of JEALOUSY and is jealous of Dev for making loads of money on OF and also having a huge platform. Dev did all this on her own and didn’t need a college degree to do so. Alex is so rude and disrespectful. Just ew. Major props to dev for being so open, calm, and not taking this guests rudeness to heart. If Alex was my counselor I’d leave and never look back.
I am so glad you pointed out the fact that ADHD in women is much different than men and it can get worse the older we get. I have never been on meds, but my psych wanted to put me on adderall and I was like nope, dont want meds, it would be different if I was in school or needed to concentrate for a high stress job, but I am neither one of those, so I dont see the point in getting on meds. I can tell that these past few months my ADHD has gotten extremely worse to the point I forget why I got up and went to another room or I forget what I am talking about mid sentence and its crazy.
I’m only about 10 mins in and I’m loving this episode so far!! The only thing I would suggest is maybe having the person introduce themselves a little more at the beginning and say what they do for a living? I love the long format of these videos though and I’m so excited every time you post!! 💗🥰
I love how you're doing this on your own. I could always sense you were more deep and willing to be vulnerable than claud. I appreciate your realness❣❣❣
are you kidding me guys? Backhanded and throwing shade at my best friend? Stop trying to create negativity from everything. I simply liked it because she wrote that she liked I was doing this on my own and I’m real, it’s not easy having a show on your own and staying true to yourself in the process. Jesus Christ.
@@WereAllInsane Amen Dev, I'm glad you got me! I literally love both of you. No hate whatsoever!!! These people need to get a life! Keep doin your thang hot stuff
OH MY GOD there is nothing more annoying than someone “correcting” your choice of worlds while you’re being vulnerable. “Can you replace that word” eww
The fact that she asked if you get confidence from the external validation is WILD. That whole start of that conversation was so condescending on her part. Sneak disses like oh are you fulfilled? Not a fan of her.
Devorah defined her confidence and value by sharing her deepest emotions and thoughts publicly, in this video. Devorah I am a huge fan of yours, way to go amiga, keep it up!
While it isn’t common, and now it’s labeled as schizoaffective disorder bipolar type, a person can in fact have both bipolar disorder and schizophrenia at the same time. Also, to my knowledge, there are three types of bipolar disorder. The “milder” one she described is called “Cyclothymic Disorder”. Bipolar 1 is where the person experiences the awful mania. Bipolar 2 is where moods can go from even to high, but less high. However, their lows are severe.
This woman would be at a restaurant ordering and when the waiter/waitress confirms her order she’d go “WOW. That’s SO insightful of you to take that away from this conversation! Can we just take a moment to celebrate this victory for you?“
Aw love that she pointed out that youre a good listener. You really are Dev. I have a good friend from high school whom much like Dev, comes of as someone who is pretty oblivious about other people's thoughts or opinions. Fast forward to adulthood we still see each other and she would point out many different things that Ive said back then abt things that I myself have almost forgotten. Love to see this side of you Dev
it almost seems like she doesn’t like her and she is judging her!!! what kind of questions are those!!!!! she needs a new profession if this is the way she is with everyone.
I love this podcast but this episode at times was a bit hard to get through due to the interrupting on Alex's part (just my personal opinion, others can disagree ofc)
i hate how invalidating this therapist is. correcting her for believing she was depressed after agreeing that she’s in touch with herself and knows herself, like huh?! and she is SO DISRUPTIVE i feel like i can’t even hear you over her “yea” “mhm” and the noises she keeps making like THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU!
Hi, I love this episode and I appreciate your willingness to open up about vulnerable topics. This makes me feel so understood. One note is there are people with both bipolar and schizophrenia. My ex was diagnosed with bipolar 1 and schizophrenia.
The vast majority of therapists are neurotic. It's why they were attracted to psychology in the first place. Sigmund Freud is a prime example: a man with multiple phobias and personality disorders who became a heavy cocaine addict. Be careful to protect yourself if you go to a therapist. Evaluate the person dispassionately. Nine times out of ten, you will need to be sensible and quit, especially if he or she is pushing drugs. (A big red flag.) Good therapists are out there-and they're wonderful-but not easy to find.
I could not handle the constant hmmms from the therapist. I can't seem to focus on what she is saying when I keep hearing her hmmm. I understand it's to let her know she's listening but I could not handle it because she wasn't. This was insufferable
Ok. I stopped a little over half way to come down and read the comments to see if I was alone in being annoyed with this therapist, and I'm not. Sorry, can't finish this episode. She needs more training. Don't let her or the other therapists make you give up on therapy. I went through several therapists before I found one that worked well for me. Now I'm running out of things to talk about in therapy because things are going so well. She's amazing and probably overshares but that is what I need in a therapist. She also validated all my feelings and lets me vent. There are good ones out there that will vibe with you. Just keep trying if you want therapy
Actual therapist here. Alex behavior in this is why people are so iffy about therapy. To be a licensed mental health professional and not be able to let the word insane go is wild. We meet people where they are, not inflict our own discomforts on them.
And also there's nothing wrong with saying "This is insane" in regards to some abstract situation, and she made her go back and replace the word. It goes without saying, that this is just an intentional hyperbole. I was in therapy with 5 different doctors and there were some unprofessional ones but her behavior's just odd and kinda uncomfortable to me.
the therapist is absolutely insufferable. I was only able to finish this because I love hearing about Dev
bro same fr
So. Fucking. Insufferable.
as a therapist myself, and a huge fan of this podcast, this was the only episode that I couldn’t finish because the therapists inability to let you speak was so upsetting. to me, this felt very much like her wanting to demonstrate her insights and not so subtly share her own opinions. I hope in time she grows the confidence to sit back and let her training speak for itself so that she doesn’t feel so compelled to constantly fill the void or interrupt those in dialogue with her.
Ditto, this is the first episode I’ve come across that I just cannot finish.
if she's a "licensed social worker" does that even make her a therapist? i don't really feel like she is professional, she seems like she would work with teens and people with teenage mentality and that's all she could probably handle in terms of how far her abilities go for helping people...
This!
Such an irritating guest to have for real
So much interrupting. Can't finish.
this is the kind of therapist that makes you not want to go to therapy
No, this is the kind of therapist who tells it like it is and how your actions will have repurcussions.
@@gone.golfing does it work? Does it actually have good influence on patients?
I have been going to therapy for 3 years and this reminded me of the worst session I have ever had. Lord.
This made me sooooo appreciate of my therapist. I already was before but wow my therapist listens like a straight G
Same
" can i just ..." " can we talk about that ..." GIRL NO YOU CAN'T.
😂
🤣🤣🤣🤣💀
😂where did this lady get her license, cause it needs to be revoked
literally like OH MY GOD LITERALLY JUST SIT AND LISTEN FOR ONE SECOND.
The therapist not even being able to hear the word insane and just let it go because it’s her personal opinion is insane
it's not really her "personal opinion," though... she's a guest because she is a credentialed LCSW. she knows the difference between clinically insane and "insane" in colloquial usage, but not *everyone* does. i think she was well within her knowledge & experience to discuss the technically correct usage of the term. it seemed like it was just a pet peeve of hers when folks misuse words like crazy, insane, psychotic, etc., and that seems fine lol we all have our own weird little quirks and frustrations over seemingly silly things 🙃
Boom 💥 you nailed it .
that part yes. but the rest?????
She can't hear the words insane yet she'll openly say psychotic
Word police
Not only the therapist is showing a great deal of passive judgement, but also deep-rooted insecurity. I love how Dev stood up for herself so naturally and was so patient and eloquent when faced with such rude behaviour. (there's no way her two previous therapists were worse than this one, ick)
So let me get this straight, a social worker claiming to be a legit therapist goes on a podcast called “we’re all insane” and proceeds to take offense of the word “insane”. Then proceeds to be passive aggressive about her judgement of the host and one of her jobs. While also interrupting her constantly. With a dash of random gaslighting and having some clear narcissistic traits. This lady should not be working in mental health she’s insane.
Very well said. It seems like she went into this with the intention to fight and come out the victor, not be an interviewee!
😭 spot on
Licensed clinical social workers are able to work in that capacity.
no i agree. first 2 min and i alr hate her
did you just say the word insane 😕🥲👹
The way she “asks” questions, but in the question has a blatant opinion. It’s enraging. She is lacking social etiquette. She’s not truly listening to Devs answers, she’s interrupted every sentence, finishing most sentences for her. “Is there and and coming.” She’s trying to direct the conversation in the way she wants it to go, you can see she rehearsed these questions and responses. 😅
That's how therapy works... she was leading the conversation to give it coherent form and structure so that Dev would have a followable train of thought and specific insights to pull from the conversation. You have no idea what you're talking about.
@@itstherileyquinn thanks for your insight 🫶🏽
this lady is the most insufferable guest you’ve had on here😭 she was all over the place, refused to let the conversation flow, and was annoyingly condescending towards you
I agree
Agree
YES! She's controlling the freaking interview. Yuck. 😫😫
Sometimes the truth hurts hun. That uncomfortable feeling you’re experiencing, the one that feels “insufferable” is quite literally telling the truth…
@sarahalderman3126 except she's not. She corrected Dev when Dev was correct. You can have both schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. It's schizoaffective disorder. That's not all, but that's a major one. Also part of her job
My therapist never interrupts me. Saying "ok" "mmhmm" is not giving me listening skills. Making noises while someone is talking drowns out certain details when someone else is talking. It gives corporate meeting vibes. She must either like talking or she has so many clients that she is used to getting people to the point under 1 hr time slots. Move them in and hurry to ship them out.
Literally I wish she would just shut up
Came here to say this! Had to stop the episode 12 minutes in because I can’t stand to hear her say “hmm” “ya” “ok”
I don't believe Devorah is a therapist. Last I knew she worked in law enforcement and had an OF page of her own with plenty of nude and revealing content.
I disagree it’s a polite way of letting people know you are listening literally called active listening and it’s great when it’s not overused.
She’s not a therapist and never said she was. Not defending her lol
If this chick was my therapist, I’d leave my sessions feeling even more insecure. Jesus 🤦🏻♀️
Of course because that will keep you coming back. If they were in the business of actually "curing" people they would have many clients after so long.
Yeah she’s condescending as shit
most of the people in this field are so frustrating like i can't believe someone tried to diagnose Dev with adhd and put her on pills after one fucking session it's disgusting. pathologizing normal human behaviour is a disease in itself that spread through colonialism
@@Gorl-rilla lol what a therapist is never going to cure anything they are going to help you navigate your emotions and feelings about any number of topics. You don't just cure people by talking to someone that's ridiculous
The therapist asking "are you proud?" just sounded so condescending and jealous of Dev.
Maybe jealous of the money, that's about it. No one is jealous of a sex worker.
That genuinely made me mad it was so condescending. Could have been worded so much better. “How do you feel about this being your career path?”
Massive respect to devs for not screaming, "CAN YOU LET ME TALK" haha
I'm pretty sure she is judging you silently. Her body language and way of speaking says it all. Her aura is so negative...
It's not judging, it's reality.
Of course she is judging. We all judge people. The difference is whether you react to your judgements.
Quite outwardly judging in my opinion
couldn’t even watch the rest of this😭😭 when the guest asked if you’re proud, it felt like she kept wanting to make you feel bad
These are actual adult life accountable questions
Or to help her realize that she is in fact degrading herself (and women in general). I get the instinct to protect our faulty beliefs but reality is reality.
Omg I stoped it in 17:22 the same thing , because I get mad that she asked her if she is proud, like wtf wrong with u .
@@healing_1 which is due to a refusal to face reality… we should always look into the things that we find uncomfortable.❤️
She literally kept correcting her for the smallest things that everyday people do.. focused on that and not Devs story.
Honestly Alex was annoying. Changing topics , interupting Dev while shes actually trying to hold a conversation rather than doing a q&a, her tone was more condescending than anything else.asking silly questions, the use of the word "insane" like common , drop it 😒
She’s stressing me the f out I wanna hear Dev talk but I had to stop
Agreed
I think she was trying too hard to make herself look like a good podcast co host 💀 I literally thought the same thing… like stfu when other people are talking.
Yes! Insane isn’t only to describe mental illness. It also means “outrageous”. I’m so annoyed haha
I feel she was just excited actually I feel Dev is really fake.
I gotta say I wish your guest Alex would let you finish your sentences and not jump at every opportunity to speak for your experiences
Thissss.. i was so annoyed she didnt let Dev finish many intresting takes
This!!!!
Well imo I think it’s because dev says something that alex wants to touch on before they continue talking more. There’s a certain way dev words something she’s saying, and the social worker is trying help her understand a more positive way that she could think about it. Or replace words that could be turned from negative to positive. Dev is really good at talking I feel like she could keep going on and on. It’s better to touch on it right away than have to go back and point out all the things. If that makes sense. I respect your pov just wanted to share mine (:
@@arim.3304 I completely agree with you! Alex wasn't interrupting to be rude, she just wanted to correct certain words in the moment, cause like you said, it's easier than trying to remember that to go back to while also trying to be an active listener.
@@angelinaagosto6538 No, I could see that if it only happened a few times. It was literally every single question and sentence.
Hello, I'm an MD, just wanted to correct something here, you can definitely have bipolar and schizophrenia at the same time, great episode !
Yes
My brother was diagnosed with both. So yes I agree.
it’s called schizoaffective disorder.
My brother is diagnosed with both, thank you for this.
Yes I just looked it up myself cause I found that statement hard to believe
I really wish the guest would let Dev finish her sentences. It was pretty unprofessional and seemed like a way of trying to control the narrative rather than letting someone feel like their voice matters.
I truly enjoy Devs podcast. She is a natural at hosting and leads conversations so well while giving space for guest to share. It’s hard to come by and I appreciate this podcast so much. Hopefully future guest will continue to show her the respect she deserves ❤
@juliana o She mentioned that she has anxiety ,and this is how it can manifest itself!( interrupting the person who is talking even when you want to listen) it's can also be a trauma response
@@Christian_Princess doesn’t matter. We all have issues but personally I don’t use mine as an excuse to be rude
@@Anna-rv3fv she didn't intend to be rude ,that's how she is ,how her trauma issues manifest.She was trying best to be kind, compassionate and understanding. maybe over eagerly trying to be helpful in this interview
@@Christian_Princess or she’s just unprofessional. anxiety is not an excuse for everything
@noebar I personally can relate, and feel like a dingus when I realize I'm doing it, but it's part of my personality so it happens constantly. Yes it annoys some, but a good amount of people see my eagerness and my attentiveness. It's important to me that people feel listened to since I often don't feel listened to. I am more animated and actually act interested, just overtly so 😅 my mom was like this too. Hopefully I'll be better at making it less annoying as I get older.
This conversation almost makes me want to hurl because Alex’s questions sounds as if they are almost intentionally framed around to forcefully shame Dev
Because women dont see why they end up in these industries besides "they want too". Its not good for society, and its not coming from mentally healthy People.
not at all ,she wnts to know how she feels
@@CAMZARTHow she is wording everything, her facial expressions, her reaction to things… She’s clearly judging.
Kind of the opposite, when dev said “he cheated on me with a stripper” seems like she separates herself from sex workers like she’s above them while also being one
I also might be confused because I only listen to the audio
I wish the therapist would let her finish her thoughts good lord
Agree
Its like shes just waiting to talk instead of actually listening..kind of condescending even
I know
@@ashlove555 Got the same impression. Was kind of stressed watching their interaction. She needs to take it slower and let Devorah unpack her own explanations in more depth.
Ik
Kinda funny how Alex’s first “teaching point” is that therapists either have their own agenda for the session or their approach is to let their client take the lead. Then she proceeds to interrupt, change direction of the conversation, etc., throughout the whole conversation!!! LOL 😂😂😂. She seems to love hearing her own self talk-at the expense of the person trying to tell their story. That’s a shame. As others have mentioned, active listening and being able to control your own impulses to interrupt and control the interaction are two of the most important skills of a successful counselor, therapist, social worker, doctor, etc. Alex seems super hyperactive throughout the session and either doesn’t understand the importance of letting the person talk or just cannot control herself from interrupting-in which case, she should learn how to manage that before trying to counsel vulnerable people. She seems either very inexperienced or just egotistical with a deep need to control the interaction.
ok, I thought it was just me thinking this.
Perfect assessment of the situation!
You hit the nail on the head!!
I was going to say, I would call her out within a first session with her; as I have a set thing I'm trying to lay out and tell you. I'm incredibly self aware and know exactly what I want to say and THEN we can ask all the questions after. but this woman just trails the conversation into a completely different path. she seems to be incredibly new and unexperienced in general life interactions as well as self important with the way she couldn't let someone reach their own conclusion.
Perfect way of saying that.
It's insane how vulnerable Dev is in this episode but at the same time self-aware, strong, smart, and real
Careful now don’t use the word insane 😉
y’all are blatantly being disrespectful. That’s the opposite of what this podcast is about. Do better.
@@cadenmichael_??
She's constantly interrupting you, I don't see how she would treat patients if she can't let you finish and constantly finishes your sentence, shouldn't she know that's the last thing you should do? I've watched a few episodes and you do a much better job listening and asking appropriate questions at the right time than a trained professional.
"WoAh LeT'S TaLk aBoUt It"
If she's actively trying to therap Dev in this episode she is showing her ass. Feels like she's over compensating to show that she's a therapist and failing miserably (I'm a therapist and have THOUGHTS). Also her over use of "notice" is just a classic tell that she's trying realllllllly hard.
When she asked you if you were proud, she squinted her eyes while doing that, it’s a sign of distaste, it means subconsciously that she disapproves, whether she knew it or not. I have 3 psychology degrees. I know this lol. She wasn’t being helpful, she was being condescending
I got that vibe as well 😞
Big facts
"I have 3 psychology degrees" did they teach you about the dangers of projection?
@@radreynolds8978 Projection is a psychological defense mechanism in which individuals attribute characteristics they find unacceptable in themselves to another person. This white girl did just that. She couldn’t fathom being “secksually” explicit for money & was judging Dev for doing just that. Sounds like your projecting and offended that a young 23 year old woman has 3 Psychology degrees and you don’t.
@@natalia_renteria_ I'm happy that you are educated but it sounds like they may be diploma mill degrees because (am I wrong here?) afaik one of the first things you learn studying it is that you should be careful with psychoanalysing individuals randomly in informal circumstances and that surface level shit like "people break eye contact when they lie" is worth jack. No?
This episode showcases why Dev is a great interviewer in her videos. She shuts up and lets the guest talk
Please give another therapist a shot ….& make a second video. I would have loved to have learned more about you! I think the issue was, that she reached out to you, she wanted to be in your spotlight for a second. Shows that not everyone with a degree in this field is actually helpful …. I think you should pick someone & reach out to them.
Please!
We had an incredible opportunity to learn about our host on a personal level but there were too many interruptions.
Even when Dev was just answering her questions, the amount of yeahs, ooohs, okays, and all the other side commentary was so unnecessary and annoying and added so much distraction. Just shut up and let her answer.
Alex sounds like the worst social worker / therapist. She literally interrupts Dev every single time she speaks. Mainly full blown interruptions. Sometimes just with loud yes's or quick remarks. Awful! her ego is so huge that she feels so important that she has to have control of each part. Shes not actually listening, just guessing what Devs answer will be and going onto another question before the answer. What a disgrace
Insanity is not just a term used for mental illness. Oxford: "Extreme foolishness or irrationality", Einstein: "Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results." It was a blanket term used in the medical field back when specific disorders weren't as researched and labeled as they are now. Now it's probably used more as a descriptive layman term than a diagnosis. All this to say, I don't think the podcast name is insensitive to those with mental illnesses.
lol why tf were people complaining abt that i snorted bye😭
this!! words like crazy, insane, wild are blanket terms that have general connotations. the words themselves don't solely refer to mental illness, so imo it's not insensitive or false to use those words as descriptive laymen's terms. and if you want to argue that it's insensitive to people that have or have experiences with mental experience, then under that argument, literally EVERY SINGLE word would be considered insensitive/triggering/etc to people who have had negative experiences relating to something a word can describe....
To me the title of the podcast equalizes us all. We all go through things, we all have issues, etc. I never thought it was disrespectful either.
In those context don't they need to be qualified with the terms clinically and medically.
Yeah like she doesn't get she's in entertainment and a lay person but is expected to make the professional feel comfortable and interested in her rather than the other way around....yall this woke culture is ruining every profession like come on don't be a softy snow flake we like in the real world and must cope manage and care for ourselves in the real world but with self serving therapy is annoying like come on help me if I'm paying $$$$$ this is why nobody trusts them or I'll just rant and talk to friends and Podcaster lmao the real down in the dirt mf
I honestly think you would make an excellent therapist Dev. You're naturally an active listener and also I bet you are very interested in studying the mind.
You're intelligent, well-spoken, non-judgemental, warm and a great host of this amazing podcast. I think you and Julie reach excellence in every episode.
Been here since 2019. Love you and I'm happy for you.
Therapists are not your friends and are not usually there to sit and let you talk about random things that come to your head. Most of the time, the goal is to see if you are a danger to yourself or others, see if there is an underlying mental disorder that needs to be diagnosed and treated and get you the correct prescription. With that out of the way, they may look for your trauma triggers, daily stressors and responses, give you advice to manage these or simply help you understand the problems you have.
This style of "tell me how you feel" sessions are more or less pointless. Get a friend, a pet or talk to the wall and save your money. Also, when a therapist is looking for triggers they will ask hard questions. Some people have complex trauma and they may need time before they are fully ready to answer them.
I could only watch a couple minutes. The overuse of “mmmm” and “yeah” as if she’s listening but is obviously rushing to speak and cutting you off drove me crazy! Completely unprofessional. She may be an okay “free friend therapist” but the fact she’s licensed?!
Alex needs to learn to let others speak. She is CONSTANTLY interrupting you. It's super annoying
also a bit concedending and i felt icky with how she phrased a few things - ALSO let someone use the words they want to use, it seemed that the term insane was a trigger for her, but she should understand that dev uses it differently and just let her be
Thissss my exact thoughs
@@asor_airama and she's not as smart as she thinks she is. The term clinically/medically/legally insane doesn't mean the same thing as insane.
I was really inspired by the way Dev communicated. She held space, was selfless, present and educated. She asked for consent and showed gratitude repeatedly and kept the topic on track in a kind and gentle way and really created an amazing container for this topic to be explained that can so easily go on forever.
Love this episode because of the topics that were touched on and what Dev shared. But at the same time the guest tried to take too much control of the convo and interrupted Dev a lot. It rubbed me the wrong way that she wanted to change her vocab so much, why does she need to control how people express themselves just because it offends her and doesn’t suit her lifestyle. Her job shouldn’t dictate how others talk and other people don’t have to talk all politically correct to appease you. Loved Devs transparency and shared experiences I also do think the guest has a good voice for podcasts.
My thoughts exactly. That chick is the easily offended type
I didn’t get that vibe from her at all. I really feel like she was a very good listener and has such a loving personality. I think she’s just trying to show how small things like changing the “but” to an “and” can have positive affects on life idk
?? She seemed really friendly and a great listener
I was annoyed at her she i terrupted Dev so many times and didnt let her finish many intresting takes
I completely agree. She's still a guest on DEV's show...
Dev, I really wanted to listen to this episode but couldn’t deal with this guest interrupting you every other second! Had to stop 20mins in
Weird that she said someone can't have bipolar and schizophrenia at the same time, my uncle was diagnosed with both, and I hope she touches more on that if she comes back on.
It's probably bipolar with schizophrenic/psychotic features--I believe similar to what Selena Gomez has
It’s correct to say that one shouldn’t be *diagnosed* with both conditions at once, though it does happen in practice. However, the reason is because the two conditions together are called Schizoaffective Disorder. Sometimes there will be a schizophrenia diagnosis and bipolar disorder diagnosis because they were diagnosed by two separate clinicians at different times, and perhaps both conditions have not been substantiated by the same one clinician. Whenever they have been, the diagnosis should be changed to schizoaffective disorder.
They’re always slower in diagnosing women with disorders that have psychosis.
It’s a different form of communication called “cooperative overlap”:
“In cooperative overlap, two friends may very well be talking simultaneously, hashing over ideas in a freeform manner. They are informally overlapping as a way of brainstorming. Cooperative overlap can be sharply contrasted with interrupting because of a simple fact: It is not competitive. Both talkers are working on a similar goal in conversation, problem-solving, bonding, or moving toward shared understanding.”
@Danielle yes! This made me angry. If this was the only thing she got wrong, okay but she also was annoying with trying to control everything.
lol the guest has a rigid way of interpreting things. when i read "we're all insane" its obvious to me that its a joke implying something to the effect of 'no matter what we are going through, we're not alone in our problems.' most of the guests on this podcast have opened up about deeply vulnerable things in their lives and that gives the viewers something to relate to. i suppose someone unfamiliar with the channel couldn't have known that. on the other end, Alex seems to have little regard for other people's capacity to judge. maybe it's due to her job, but she was quick to assume devorah is just clueless and needs to be corrected, when really her own understanding is what needs work.
i noticed this too
my thoughts exactly! I think its an over exaggeration, it's really not that deep. people use all kinds of terms loosely, I mean when did we get this sensitive over minor things
And I never saw her treat devorah as clueless. And I’m sure she wouldn’t have posted this if she didn’t feel it was helpful or good.
I thought it was an Alice in wonderland refrence
damn where did you find this gal 😂 she’s so aggressive and condescending
Alex keeps talking over you. It’s soooo annoying. She keeps asking and making confirmation sounds while you’re speaking every second.. it gave me so much anxiety watching this. Lol Dev you’re such a trooper 😂❤
Glad I wasn’t the only one thinking this 😂
Me tooo 😭 i wanted to hear her story and she wouldn’t let her finish a thought.
She didn’t talk over the guest who was trafficked by her older husband when he got a hole of her as a teen
She did flawlessly
I kept getting irritated she only talked about herself and interrupting like it’s all about her ! The host decided to interview another person so interview the guest instead of yourself , she mine as well just b alone asking herself questions. Couldn’t make it passed 30 mins tops
Sooo much anxiety.
Lord Jesus lol could not watch this episode comfortably! Alex seems like she cares more about looking knowledgeable and spewing info at every moment to prove she knows so much instead of activelyyyy listening to Devorah! I learned from my program that active listening is one of the most important things a social worker, counselor, therapist, etc. should practice! 😅😩
Yes she was so annoying omg!!!!
Yes definitely, in addition to listening actively you should not interrupt the client. This is something I noticed happened a lot.
I noticed this
the self worth question??
It did seem to be listening actively, and reassuring her. She’s making sure that she understands her. And helping not go into defense mode, and helping her see why she’s doing things she’s doing.
I really liked the podcast mostly because of Dev. I feel like the guest is quite biased. She is really uptight and very curious of Dev’s life but not coming from a “trying to understand Dev and discovering her point of view” more like “I wanna make an opinion on her” “judge her” I don’t really appreciate those kind of personalities. ❤
I got the same vibe
@@leona4951 Yeah! I believe it's very important to be empathic, people in those situations usually are scared and can't find comfort so as a social worker you have to try to be understanding and empathic not act controlling and condescending.
In add: Also, the name of the podcast it's imo well chosen. It's relatable and fun, why would anyone feel bad about it. It's a form of accepting the fact that we all have our down/weird/crazy moments. We are all humans with emotions.
i totally agree
I can see why you may say she is bias but I also think that she is maybe trying to help dev dig deeper. Dev said only fans lately had made her super depressed so the social worker starts asking dev questions about OF that makes her have to think more deeply about why she might be feeling that way. Is it because she had low self esteem, wasn’t proud, uncomfortable from the messages etc. Instead of trying to claim a reason, she provides possible view points and allows dev to think it though… in psychology there is a socratic view of asking “why”. For example, when a patient mentions something that is bothering them, the counselor may ask questions to help the person try to see why/what is making them feel that way.
I’m not saying I agree or disagree that Alex had a bias, just kinda playing devils advocate to your statement that she was bias or judging dev
I love how she’s making her say things differently cause she doesn’t like it.. she can say but and insane if she wants. This girl is actually pretty annoying and I never want to see any kind of therapist after this. Chick must be a control freak.
Lol you can still go to therapy. Trust me I’m a first year in my psyD and they teach us immediately to never give advice or interrupt or be judgy. This social worker is just confused
Thanks for your openness and honesty Dev. Please don't change the name of your podcast. This is a good episode
“I have the body for it” Anyone has the body for it. Literally everyone can do it, there’s an area for everyone to be included and become successful.
You are correct! A market for all body types.
I've been an OF creator since 2020 and I relate so much. At first I loved it, it gave me so much independence and freedom. Now it feels honestly horrible. The abuse and misogyny you encounter on a daily basis eventually wears you down. And yes about the sense of purpose. It feels like everyone around you is driven by something deeper and you're falling behind. Thank you for talking about this.
You thought the cream of the crop of men were paying to see you naked?
These women come in thinking it's empowering them but the men end up winning.
@@jazminrod6 thank you for speaking reality amd rationally, yes
“Freedom” of what? It’s 2022, women are equal to men. I don’t know how showing your vagina to the world is “freedom”. You made your choices so take accountability. You didn’t have to be a hoe in order to make money.
Unfortunately your customers/viewers/subs are bound to have a higher percentage of weirdos, creeps & misogynistics.
Anddddd this is why in my program my professors told us to be okay with silence, bc this therapist is doing too much 😭 like omg let her talk!!! I feel terrible for her clients
Omg I can’t finish this episode the guest cant stop bringing up a different topic without dev finishing what she was asked.
i know it was really jarring and i couldn't even finish
I don’t know, I wasn’t a fan of Alex. She felt like she was being condescending to me. I don’t know… Still very interesting episode.
The MHMs and YES, YEAH are driving me insane
As someone with bipolar 2, that definition was completely wrong 🫠
This guest is determined to not let deb finish a sentence.
I don’t know who this guest is, but she was so beyond disrespectful towards Devorah. It seems like she is actively trying to embarrass her, but Dev’s level of confidence is too high for it to work. I feel uncomfortable listening to the guest purely just talk. She didn’t come on the podcast with right ful intentions. She’s trying to prove she is knowledgeable and cares about people, but just comes across as belittling others. I don’t know where Devorah found her.
I think this would have been a much better podcast if Alex had allowed Devorah to speak uninterrupted.
yeah that's how it should be with a professional but I thought Devorah was the one interviewing Alex.... but it was just a weird disjointed back and forth conversation on a thousand topics
Making her go back and switch “insane” with “shocking” is literally insane.
"not everyone has the education I have" girl lol.. she is so intense ...
I once had a therapist like her and I only went one time, she was annoying and you can tell that she’s so inexperienced as a therapist just bc she knows “stuff” doesn’t mean she knows how to connect w ppl no matter how hard she tries.
This
woooo another good one to watch!!!!👏🏻
why did u stop the podcast 😢🥹
I wish you would not date F boys. I can see a great future with you. Just gotta switch up the type of guys you go after. Find a wholesome bluecollar midwestern man.
i wish she introduced her guests more bc im so curious on who they are and what relationship she has to them
I agree
"Not everyone has the education I have" 🤢
lol so modest right.
got fuckin whiplash from that
holy shit hahahaha
as a psych nurse i really appreciated this conversation, more people need to be educated on these things!!
“Are you proud that you did OnlyFans?” Well, Alex…Dev is doing a legitimate job for money to pay her bills and be a responsible person. So the fact that you think a relevant question is “are you proud of it?” shows that you are being judgmental-otherwise why would you ask that question? You wouldn’t ask a person that question about other legitimate jobs, so why ask about this one. Dev already made it clear that she had no moral dilemma with being an OnlyFans creator, so the question really stands out as condescending and judge-y! If the question is coming from a place of concern, why not ask instead if her (legitimate) job presents any challenges to her wellbeing?
Because it isn't a legitimate job she just doesn't realize because she is still in her 20s. When she gets wiser she will see it was a mistake.
The neutral question would be and "how do you feel about it?" Instead of subconsciously framing it around shame by asking if she's proud of it.
There's only an issue with her asking it like that if you think there is shame around it. It's completely normal to ask when the fact is a lot of people do it but do regret it or feel shame. Some people love it , some people do it and regret it . Its just an honest question
Only fans is NOT a legitimate job. nor does it indicate a responsible person-lets be real here.
It's one of the most sleazy treacherous things she can do as a woman to help collectively devalue the role of women and our sexuality in society by participating in pornography.
Shame on all women who do this and make it so much harder for women with morals and self-respect in 2023
@@yeetnama9094 your opinion of it being a "sleazy treacherous" thing does not change the fact she provides a service in exchange for money, making it a job. No matter how sad and angry you are, your feelings don't change the fact it is a job.
As someone with hyper sexuality and daddy issues her saying “oh so that’s like who you are” is so annoying and triggering because NO my sexuality and coping skills are NOT who I am, and it’s not who dev is. How is this woman even a therapist
I agree with quite a bit of what Alex had to say about mental illness, but as someone with bipolar 2 who's experienced a manic episode with psychosis because of ssris, I would definitely not describe bipolar 2 as a ''calm wave'' or even mild comparatively. People diagnosed with bipolar 2 tend to have more depressions than bipolar 1 and hypomanias rather than manias. It can be equally and sometimes more disabling. The key difference in diagnosis is the severity of the high state. But i really liked this episode, just wanted to mention that. Really love this podcast, dev! Thank you!
I’ve also experienced psychosis on my ssri and before I was given lurasidone. Hugs ❤
Her guest makes listening to this podcast as much fun as nails on a chalkboard. I. Just. Can’t.
LITERALLY
“mmmhm YEAH hm yeah OK SO-“
The fact that the therapist thinks some of us are not insane, is insane.
I’ve never watched a video with so much word gatekeeping! Gatekeeping the words “insane” and “crazy” okay, fine. Still a little weird. BUT making a big deal and interrupting Dev about the word BUT?! Was that serious?! Just let Dev speak and tell her story how she’s sees fit!!! Sometimes you don’t have to see things in the most positive light! Sometimes things are great BUT some things aren’t. It’s okay to acknowledge the negative side of things as negatives. Disregarding them as negatives doesn’t change that they’re a negative.
Alex never let’s you talk without interrupting,literally every other word she had something to say,feels like she was trying to take over the podcast
OMG.... We have a therapist and we have someone who loves to talk about themselves. This is also the one episode where we would REALLY get to know Dev. What did we get instead??? Interruptions galore. I can't tell you how many times I said "Geez, let her speak".
Listen, I really wanna hear what dev has to say but I can’t deal with this
For anyone who is questioning about her diagnosis and stating you can’t be diagnosed with both things at once please be advised she’s just a social worker and should not be making diagnosis outside of her qualifications… extremely unprofessional.
I wish I could hear this story without the topic changed every 5 mins. 😢 there was so much I feel was missed or brushed over.
I thought from the title this conversation was gonna be about the dark side of OF ?
This guest is awful. I think she has deep routed issues of JEALOUSY and is jealous of Dev for making loads of money on OF and also having a huge platform. Dev did all this on her own and didn’t need a college degree to do so. Alex is so rude and disrespectful. Just ew. Major props to dev for being so open, calm, and not taking this guests rudeness to heart. If Alex was my counselor I’d leave and never look back.
I am so glad you pointed out the fact that ADHD in women is much different than men and it can get worse the older we get. I have never been on meds, but my psych wanted to put me on adderall and I was like nope, dont want meds, it would be different if I was in school or needed to concentrate for a high stress job, but I am neither one of those, so I dont see the point in getting on meds. I can tell that these past few months my ADHD has gotten extremely worse to the point I forget why I got up and went to another room or I forget what I am talking about mid sentence and its crazy.
I’m only about 10 mins in and I’m loving this episode so far!! The only thing I would suggest is maybe having the person introduce themselves a little more at the beginning and say what they do for a living? I love the long format of these videos though and I’m so excited every time you post!! 💗🥰
I love how you're doing this on your own. I could always sense you were more deep and willing to be vulnerable than claud. I appreciate your realness❣❣❣
Why did she like this😭😭😭
Umm was that shade? I mean I agree but why is she liking it😅
@@jjjiiddppeew1810 claud has stated she doesn't like to be vulnerable online but i can see how this seems backhanded 😂 😭
are you kidding me guys? Backhanded and throwing shade at my best friend? Stop trying to create negativity from everything. I simply liked it because she wrote that she liked I was doing this on my own and I’m real, it’s not easy having a show on your own and staying true to yourself in the process. Jesus Christ.
@@WereAllInsane Amen Dev, I'm glad you got me! I literally love both of you. No hate whatsoever!!! These people need to get a life! Keep doin your thang hot stuff
OH MY GOD there is nothing more annoying than someone “correcting” your choice of worlds while you’re being vulnerable. “Can you replace that word” eww
Did anyone else get anxiety from watching this episode?
Yep. On top of that I watched it on 1.5x speed 😂😂
The fact that she asked if you get confidence from the external validation is WILD. That whole start of that conversation was so condescending on her part. Sneak disses like oh are you fulfilled? Not a fan of her.
Can she let devorah talk?! She wouldn’t let her finish a thought before asking another question
Devorah defined her confidence and value by sharing her deepest emotions and thoughts publicly, in this video. Devorah I am a huge fan of yours, way to go amiga, keep it up!
While it isn’t common, and now it’s labeled as schizoaffective disorder bipolar type, a person can in fact have both bipolar disorder and schizophrenia at the same time. Also, to my knowledge, there are three types of bipolar disorder. The “milder” one she described is called “Cyclothymic Disorder”. Bipolar 1 is where the person experiences the awful mania. Bipolar 2 is where moods can go from even to high, but less high. However, their lows are severe.
This woman would be at a restaurant ordering and when the waiter/waitress confirms her order she’d go “WOW. That’s SO insightful of you to take that away from this conversation! Can we just take a moment to celebrate this victory for you?“
she's one of those people who nods and says "mhmm, mhmm" before she even knows what the other person is saying.
My favorite part of my week is when I get to pour a glass of wine and watch this podcast
Aw love that she pointed out that youre a good listener. You really are Dev. I have a good friend from high school whom much like Dev, comes of as someone who is pretty oblivious about other people's thoughts or opinions. Fast forward to adulthood we still see each other and she would point out many different things that Ive said back then abt things that I myself have almost forgotten. Love to see this side of you Dev
Awwww ❤ I love this
i’m from 2024 and in the past months i’ve binged your shows i love them so much you’ve grown so big
it almost seems like she doesn’t like her and she is judging her!!! what kind of questions are those!!!!! she needs a new profession if this is the way she is with everyone.
The constant “mhmm” from the therapist made it challenging to focus on what Dev is saying
Anyone else annoyed by how much the guest interrupted?
The therapist was beyond rude!
I love this podcast but this episode at times was a bit hard to get through due to the interrupting on Alex's part (just my personal opinion, others can disagree ofc)
i hate how invalidating this therapist is. correcting her for believing she was depressed after agreeing that she’s in touch with herself and knows herself, like huh?! and she is SO DISRUPTIVE i feel like i can’t even hear you over her “yea” “mhm” and the noises she keeps making like THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU!
I echo this million times over. Those noises - so disingenuous 🤮
** You can have bipolar and schizophrenia together- it’s called schizoaffective disorder.
Hi,
I love this episode and I appreciate your willingness to open up about vulnerable topics. This makes me feel so understood.
One note is there are people with both bipolar and schizophrenia. My ex was diagnosed with bipolar 1 and schizophrenia.
The vast majority of therapists are neurotic. It's why they were attracted to psychology in the first place. Sigmund Freud is a prime example: a man with multiple phobias and personality disorders who became a heavy cocaine addict. Be careful to protect yourself if you go to a therapist. Evaluate the person dispassionately. Nine times out of ten, you will need to be sensible and quit, especially if he or she is pushing drugs. (A big red flag.) Good therapists are out there-and they're wonderful-but not easy to find.
30 minutes in and this is my favorite episode thus far! I love the rawness and depth of conversation 🫶🏼 nice job dev!
This seemed like an interesting topic but I just can’t listen to this
The therapist ruined it
I could not handle the constant hmmms from the therapist. I can't seem to focus on what she is saying when I keep hearing her hmmm. I understand it's to let her know she's listening but I could not handle it because she wasn't. This was insufferable
Thank you for saying it out loud! I thought that the WHOLE TIME!!
Ok. I stopped a little over half way to come down and read the comments to see if I was alone in being annoyed with this therapist, and I'm not. Sorry, can't finish this episode. She needs more training. Don't let her or the other therapists make you give up on therapy. I went through several therapists before I found one that worked well for me. Now I'm running out of things to talk about in therapy because things are going so well. She's amazing and probably overshares but that is what I need in a therapist. She also validated all my feelings and lets me vent. There are good ones out there that will vibe with you. Just keep trying if you want therapy