I love when they call Satan and he just.... shows up. Like, immediately. As if he has nothing else to do but sit next to the phone all day, every day, just begging it to ring.
@@JasonBrant sorry crew but this movie was funnier than a 3 legged cat trying to bury a turd, please review the movie I sent eye of the tiger please, keep up the great work
5:06 “Yeah! I’d like to report a goat head found?” That might be my favorite line from any movie I’ve seen on this channel. Also, that church in the beginning is 100% a garage.
Haven't watched that one yet. Looked intentionally bad to us.
ปีที่แล้ว +1
@@JasonBrant It is intentional. I watched it solely because it was my job to make subtitles for that crap. I think I've developed Leukemia watching it. :D :D
"Old skool" episode with just Jason and Brian. Can't remember the last time you guys shot one of those. Erin wisely tapped out on this voodoo snoozer. It was the cinematic equivalent of an "upper decker."
Stinks on ice doesn't begin to describe this unflushed toilet. Thanks for keeping hope alive in me that I could make a feature in my backyard with an iPhone!
So far the fake goat has the best dialogue and acting in this movie. Hail Satan! Maybe that was Stephanie Newton showing her dynamic range as an actress?
I left an UPPER DECKER at a party once...dude told everyone to go to the gas station down the street to use the bathroom. Well, i found said bathroom in party house and laid an upper decker 😂😂😂
Reporting a goat head to police is up there but calling sheriff reporting their wife was taken away in a balloon from killer klowns from outer space still holds that crown lol.
Was a little surprised you didn't notice the obvious cardboard boat at 9:35. We only see the very front of it and the actor pretends that it's heavy, but it's also being pulled by a piece of thin twine and is, well, corrugated and painted with what appears to be green poster paint.
Wow this feels like a female Neil Breen movie, just not as boring and more crazy af lol 😂😂😂 She's gone from suck to blow. Great Spaceballs reference Brian 😂😂
The lens that keeps vignetting is a cut-price wide angle adapter, but the cheap handicam they used is already zoomed out to maximum. But, you know, who else are you going to be able to get coverage of the whole garage?
I was definitely going to mention this. The screw on after market wide angle adapter that was a little too small, so it vignettes. A proper wide angle adapter is usually a huge piece of glass on the front. I've had both the branded, camera specific adapter that worked well, and a cheap china adapter that was essentially useless because it looked like what you see here.
You poor fellas! This looked painful to watch. Good on Quin Kelly for insuring that they're unlikely to remember that it even happened. Jason was probably constantly surprised while editing. Like, "I don't recall ANY of this" level surprised.
From now until the earth burns to a crisp in the expanding red haze of Sol's destruction, "upper deck-her with his fist" will be the way in which i describe someone taking it on the chin.
Holy Clerics! The guy with the nose in the white hat is Paul Zanone. We were both stuntmen back in the day. He was a college student and could memorize plays in their entirety. He also printed out the stunt team's wanted posters. Salt of the Earth guy. Deserved better roles. Mad respect, SBIG!
Stephanie Beaton actually has a TH-cam channel and it does seem like she owns a house with a lot of weird "occult" stuff. So it is very possible they shot this at her house.
Oh hey, it's Film Star Randal Malone! Surprised you didn't recognise him, he's been in... uh... The Amazing Bulk. ...OK, I can see why you wouldn't recognise him.
I checked him on IMDb and he’s been an awful lot of awful films, and is quoted as saying it’s a blessing to get to be in any film whatsoever, also that if you get an opportunity to help anyone you should. This combination of ideas could result in a LOT of roles in movies made by people who need help. The Amazing Bulk is the only other film I’m sure I’ve seen him in. Seems rather a kindly guy.
Don’t make me come over and upper decker both of you in your single car garage…. I am pissing myself laughing over that… WHEN CAN WE ORDER THE UPPER DECKER T-SHIRT?
Welcome to the land of Randal Malone, the sequined villain of this movie! He's got at least 50 movies to his credit, but the one I would recommend is The Amazing Bulk. You will never be more confused.
Do you think the cult members in this movie are affiliated with the cult in Champagne & Bullets? I want them to be in the same universe. They were introduced to each other by the bridge troll in Lost Faith. That’s vanity project fan fiction.
Stephanie Beaton...woof!!!! Of course they drank a lot..talk about beer goggles! Now you know why they mixed voodoo and satan and magic and....🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 it's killing me..oh God help me! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
PLEASE do Zombeavers!!! We just watched it and it will be gold for you guys!! Zombie beavers biting giggles off during completely time appropriate sex scenes, random zombie bears, and make sure you go topless at every opportunity and carry around a severed foot the entire move.
Beer went all over the place with " I would like to report a goats head" 😅 Also the main guy looks like the villain from Naked Gun, who sings in the shower 😅
10:27 I'm pretty sure the police being so angry about the PI finding the murder victim is because it pulled the police off of the very important goat head investigation they're conducting. They had every available officer on the case and were SO close to finding out who murdered and decapitated a poor Muppet head goat, but the PI just had to go and distract them about a simple human murder. It was just downright inconsiderate of him! 🤬
Look, I know we usually watch movies with a budget of about $6.50 on here, but this is ridiculous. xD Honestly, at this rate Jason I want to see the supposedly crappy movies that you all made in college. Especially that one where Dave ended up with a chipped tooth.
I think... this is an abandonned house! In one of the shots with the red curtains I saw no glass in the windows just a sheet of plastic that I saw move in the wind!😂
It’s like she got together with all her neighbours to have a fun day out and make something. The guy two houses down supplied the camera, etc. A fun excursion for the whole block :)
I believe I have more change in my couch than the entire budget of this movie.
Oh my God, the commentary on this is a solid 10/10 🤣🤣🤣
That's not a fair comparison, my couch is hillbilly rich lol
Not even enough money to see some Beatons in her own movie!
What about the film with the paper sets and science boxes? That's a contender...@@JasonBrant
Great line!
I rarely genuinely laugh out loud at stuff, but the "I'd like to report a goat head" killed me
Same 😂😂
That was a great line 🤣
It was the goat SFX for me.
no, it was the goat sound that had me dying.
I love when they call Satan and he just.... shows up. Like, immediately. As if he has nothing else to do but sit next to the phone all day, every day, just begging it to ring.
"Dude is motorboating satan" might be the greatest editor note ive ever seen in TH-cam
"There were some decisions made here" needs to be the tag line for Jason's vanity project.
Haha!
@@JasonBrant sorry crew but this movie was funnier than a 3 legged cat trying to bury a turd, please review the movie I sent eye of the tiger please, keep up the great work
"God, all I wanted to be was an actress."
You're in this movie. That's not going to happen.
"Where the hell's Stephanie Beaton?" That's a question I ask myself every time I watch a movie.
Stephanie is welcome to Beaton me any time she wants.
I'll see myself out.
She’s on youtube.
Summoning Satan felt just like setting up a Zoom call
🤣
5:06 “Yeah! I’d like to report a goat head found?”
That might be my favorite line from any movie I’ve seen on this channel.
Also, that church in the beginning is 100% a garage.
I can make this movie... And I'm three drinks into a blackout🎉
That main Satanist also plays the main villain in Amazing Bulk.
Oh my god it is!!!!
Holy crap!
Haven't watched that one yet. Looked intentionally bad to us.
@@JasonBrant It is intentional. I watched it solely because it was my job to make subtitles for that crap. I think I've developed Leukemia watching it. :D :D
It's immediately going to be a good episode with a vanity project, especially such a "buoyant" one
haha!
Boob jokes only get you so far
"Old skool" episode with just Jason and Brian. Can't remember the last time you guys shot one of those. Erin wisely tapped out on this voodoo snoozer. It was the cinematic equivalent of an "upper decker."
Stinks on ice doesn't begin to describe this unflushed toilet. Thanks for keeping hope alive in me that I could make a feature in my backyard with an iPhone!
Send it to me when you finish it.
Count on it!@@JasonBrant
The entire upper decker bit KILLED me. Love this series.
This whole movie is an upper decker!
Hahahaha omg. He's shiting in mah toilet 🚽
So far the fake goat has the best dialogue and acting in this movie. Hail Satan! Maybe that was Stephanie Newton showing her dynamic range as an actress?
Holy shit it’s that guy from the amazing bulk!
I guess that movie did include a "real" actor?
Didn't watch that one yet.
@@JasonBrant you’re in for a “treat “
Randal Malone, almost a real actor. Been in a lot of C list movies. And i mean C as in crap.
@@JasonBrantoh you're in for it🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I left an UPPER DECKER at a party once...dude told everyone to go to the gas station down the street to use the bathroom. Well, i found said bathroom in party house and laid an upper decker 😂😂😂
Classic....
I swear every time Brian said “Voodoo Magic”. This is what I was waiting to hear..” I’ll tell you what I believe… Shit happens!”
Reporting a goat head to police is up there but calling sheriff reporting their wife was taken away in a balloon from killer klowns from outer space still holds that crown lol.
"Killer clowns, huh? Holy shìt!"
But only a found goat head has a police code.
Was a little surprised you didn't notice the obvious cardboard boat at 9:35. We only see the very front of it and the actor pretends that it's heavy, but it's also being pulled by a piece of thin twine and is, well, corrugated and painted with what appears to be green poster paint.
9:41 Good call. Someone remembered to recycle the refrigerator box...
A Stephanine Beaton movie IS the upper decker of movies you find being sold at gas stations and truck stops across America.
7:52 Ugh 2003 was 20 years ago... I'm stuck in the mindset that "20 years ago" is referring to the 80's. Yikes.
We're old.
The scene with the guys throat slashed it looks he’s choking out Dave . That’s funny
😆
This looks like a movie we would've made as a High School project. It's not even at college film student level.
13:00
Hang on, you guys watched "who killed cpt. Alex"? How is there not an episode about this masterpiece of ungandan filmmaking?!
There was a camera issue, so it's only available on Patreon.
Apparently I missed so many movies growing up. Glad you all can show me the way!
Missed is an interesting word choice 🤣
The guy playing Satan's Liberace is Randal Malone. He also appears in the excruciating (and recommended) The Amazing Bulk.
Satan's Liberace rofl...
That's "Film Star Randal Malone", thank you 😅
I think I've said this before but I LOVE that t-shirt Jason! Joe Bob Briggs is a legend. I grew up watching MonsterVision.
He's a legend.
Wow this feels like a female Neil Breen movie, just not as boring and more crazy af lol 😂😂😂 She's gone from suck to blow. Great Spaceballs reference Brian 😂😂
It's not a vanity project -the reason she did it all by herself was just that nobody else wanted to do it.
Actual quote from Michael Flatley about Black Bird.
That's what a vanity project is.
Hah!
The lens that keeps vignetting is a cut-price wide angle adapter, but the cheap handicam they used is already zoomed out to maximum. But, you know, who else are you going to be able to get coverage of the whole garage?
Ahh, good call.
I was definitely going to mention this. The screw on after market wide angle adapter that was a little too small, so it vignettes. A proper wide angle adapter is usually a huge piece of glass on the front. I've had both the branded, camera specific adapter that worked well, and a cheap china adapter that was essentially useless because it looked like what you see here.
Jason just summed up all these cinematic turds: "Why? Why?"
the actors were promised free booze and they were gonna get it
Definitely went to pound town on it.
You could say, she didn't wonder off the Beaton path of success lol
And here's your rim shot.... lol😅
here all week lol @@GJohnson1981
Damn following up Alone in the dark with this makes that movie look oscar worthy.
They're hammering sparkling cider throughout this.
Everyone chugged.
When they reached the 'upper-decker' moment, had to ask myself what the ABV was on their cinema tonic water... :D
This is the most drunk SBIG i think ive seen, you legends!
Shit, this isn't even top 10, haha.
Wow, not even the top 10 @JasonBrant?! Even though as Brian pointed out, you were on your second 20 POUND beer! I’m impressed! 😂
Love that Stephanie Beaton. The passion Network (a.k.a. A PASSION) was one of my earliest skinflicks. Ohhhhh the mamories. Tee hee
I literally just woke up from a procedure in the hospital to find THIS waiting for me! Thank you! Perfect piece of schlock to recover to!❤🙏🏾❤️
Welcome back from anaesthesia! 😅
@@Panicagq2 it was quite the thing to wake up to!😳
My apologies for waking up to us🤣
Damn! You were able to watch this?! All I could do after aenesthesia was sleep for half a day!😂
You poor fellas! This looked painful to watch. Good on Quin Kelly for insuring that they're unlikely to remember that it even happened. Jason was probably constantly surprised while editing. Like, "I don't recall ANY of this" level surprised.
I resemble that.
Stephanie Beaton AND Satan? I. AM. IN.
That's what I said!
Liberace's older brother was the villain in the The Amazing Bulk. You guys should watch that masterpiece one day! Lol!
Why do I feel the urge to upper deck the house of all those I dislike.
4:00 Oh, man, that goat sound had me rolling.
10:30 That is the oldest cop in American history
Dude is hanging in there.
From now until the earth burns to a crisp in the expanding red haze of Sol's destruction, "upper deck-her with his fist" will be the way in which i describe someone taking it on the chin.
Mad points for teh Joe-Bob Briggs Monstervision shirt. I have one myself. of him at the drive-in.
Dude is a legend.
I'm a conservation law enforcement officer. We get way too many headless animal calls, lol.
“This is the lowest budget we’ve seen”. Uh oh. They haven’t gotten to Things yet have they?
I believe they're doing it this week.
@@themoviedealers I remember seeing this movie side by side with things in a community post yea. Goly that’s gonna be fun
Holy Clerics! The guy with the nose in the white hat is Paul Zanone. We were both stuntmen back in the day. He was a college student and could memorize plays in their entirety. He also printed out the stunt team's wanted posters. Salt of the Earth guy. Deserved better roles. Mad respect, SBIG!
"Captain Satan" is Randal Malone, he was Dr. Kantlove in 'The Amazing Bulk'.
Stephanie Beaton actually has a TH-cam channel and it does seem like she owns a house with a lot of weird "occult" stuff.
So it is very possible they shot this at her house.
She's a character for sure.
Stephanie Beatoff
@@AliceBowie I don't get it?
Oh hey, it's Film Star Randal Malone! Surprised you didn't recognise him, he's been in... uh... The Amazing Bulk.
...OK, I can see why you wouldn't recognise him.
I checked him on IMDb and he’s been an awful lot of awful films, and is quoted as saying it’s a blessing to get to be in any film whatsoever, also that if you get an opportunity to help anyone you should. This combination of ideas could result in a LOT of roles in movies made by people who need help. The Amazing Bulk is the only other film I’m sure I’ve seen him in.
Seems rather a kindly guy.
Oh, he's a SUPER nice guy, from everything I've seen. It's just that a lot of his film roles are in smaller budget things.
We started it and turned it off right after the opening credits. Looked like it was intentionally bad.
Imagine renting this to see the beatons and you get nothing. Like things weren't already bad enough.
I have to hand it to you Two for having the fortitude to sit through this one 😂🤣😂🤣
Don’t make me come over and upper decker both of you in your single car garage…. I am pissing myself laughing over that… WHEN CAN WE ORDER THE UPPER DECKER T-SHIRT?
Welcome to the land of Randal Malone, the sequined villain of this movie! He's got at least 50 movies to his credit, but the one I would recommend is The Amazing Bulk. You will never be more confused.
Upperdeck I have not heard that name since 2010 they use to handle the yugioh card game.
I don't know what that means, but cool.
Somebody has a detective business out of their mom's basement. I think the whole movie was filmed in mom's basement. 😂
Mom's garage.
Do you think the cult members in this movie are affiliated with the cult in Champagne & Bullets? I want them to be in the same universe. They were introduced to each other by the bridge troll in Lost Faith. That’s vanity project fan fiction.
5:12 i fùcking spit coffee on the floor🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣gorrammit!!!
Amazing writing.
I kept waiting for the guy in red to shout "Get ready for a surprise!".
That lens vignette looks like the improvised fish-eye lenses skatebvoarders would cobble together.
3:47 That's a guy you send the private detective after. He should not be playing the private detective.
Holy cow! What an atrocity...
You gotta be really hammered to sit through this pile 😂
How could you bear it?
Stephanie Beaton...woof!!!!
Of course they drank a lot..talk about beer goggles! Now you know why they mixed voodoo and satan and magic and....🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 it's killing me..oh God help me! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
How dare you. That's the Stephanie Beaton.
PLEASE do Zombeavers!!! We just watched it and it will be gold for you guys!! Zombie beavers biting giggles off during completely time appropriate sex scenes, random zombie bears, and make sure you go topless at every opportunity and carry around a severed foot the entire move.
I'm pretty sure the "champagne" is sparkling cider. The resealable top is a dead give away.
Beer went all over the place with " I would like to report a goats head" 😅
Also the main guy looks like the villain from Naked Gun, who sings in the shower 😅
The day turns into one word when I see a new SBIG has arrived..... WINNING!
@2:28 - "It looks like he's getting both sucked and blown"
Well done!
5:07
Meanwhile at the PD: "Cancel the BOLO on the goat head, boys. We got 'em".
The goat head moment was too funny. LOL. How would you consciously report that to the police.
There's tool on the chest, tools on the wall. Tools acting in this scene.
10:27 I'm pretty sure the police being so angry about the PI finding the murder victim is because it pulled the police off of the very important goat head investigation they're conducting. They had every available officer on the case and were SO close to finding out who murdered and decapitated a poor Muppet head goat, but the PI just had to go and distract them about a simple human murder. It was just downright inconsiderate of him! 🤬
I think after the elton john guy pickaxed the lady, the blood hitting the candle was the same shot as the chicken sacrifice!!😆😆
I love the "wow, wow,,,,,,, wow"
Hah, thanks.
So excited to watch this episode
Hope you enjoy it!
Masochism now in MonsterVision. Some low-brow upper-deck magic this episode.
🤣
The "double Satan" line got me, haha.
Beatrix,upperdeck,that must be same damn good cider LOL.
6:11 Don't worry, Jason, they're all still there.
Thank god.
"Upper Deck Her" needs to be new merch from you guys. Seriously.
You know it's going to be low budget when Randal Malone is involved!
It's the guy from The Amazing Bulk!
That thing looks like the Quaid’s bionic body disguise in Total Recall
6:25 i really wasnt expecting the guy from The Amazing Bulk to show up in this, that caught me off guard
Wow! That movie was a whole new kind of special!
You guys seem so focused on the decor and the locations, I'm glad you found something to occupy your time during this snoozefest 😂
Look, I know we usually watch movies with a budget of about $6.50 on here, but this is ridiculous. xD
Honestly, at this rate Jason I want to see the supposedly crappy movies that you all made in college. Especially that one where Dave ended up with a chipped tooth.
I was expecting more bolos with a title card like that.
I think... this is an abandonned house! In one of the shots with the red curtains I saw no glass in the windows just a sheet of plastic that I saw move in the wind!😂
Holy shit balls! So that was utterly insane!😂
Cheers guys keep up the good work!👍 much love from the U.K 🇬🇧❤👍
Thanks!
"Dude is motorboating Satan" - Damm you YT! Damm you and your prim attitude!
I wanna see Jason and Brian home made horror movie lol
It’s like she got together with all her neighbours to have a fun day out and make something. The guy two houses down supplied the camera, etc. A fun excursion for the whole block :)
Gotta see those pics of Brian as the Crow immediately please sir.
@0:19 "Voodoo magic, man". Nice Predator 2 reference.
YOU CAN'T UNSEE THAT should be the title of this movie.