Parents Take Revenge on Their Children Without Knowing It | Jordan B Peterson on the Jocko Podcast
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ส.ค. 2024
- Children push the boundaries and continuously test their parents in different social situations. It's when they don't receive the proper discipline in return that can cause parents to start disliking their children.
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I had a friend like this she absolutely refused to put any limits on her daughter and it was so sad because I saw how no one liked the kid not other children and not adults. It was sad because the kid herself didn’t understand why. And the mother goes around blaming everybody else it’s a disastrous way to go about life. And this poor kid is going to have to learn everything the hard way
Many, many people arent raising people, they are training idiots and monsters.
I respect you for being a messenger of truth Dr. Peterson. You are a great man.
Never hero worship anyone, no matter what their views. We are all human, all deeply flawed, therefore all very wrong about a lot of things.
he need to worship one God only to be one the most succseful.
One of the most.
JP... needs to be nominated for a Nobel Prize for Peace...WHERE should peace start? In the family... then could spread out from there, and he knows that!
Those prizes are for losers
Wise comment
I think he best come to grips with, and heal from his own childhood trauma. He is an intelligent, educated person, which means he intellectually understands and is able much.
These qualities, however, are, and have been possessed by many horrible parents. When the trauma is unconscious, it seems not to be there, but it's clear to me, that he's not looking to heal his trauma. Alcoholic parents, autoimmune disorders, his "need" for antidepressants and anti-anxiety meds (glad he succeeded in withdrawing without dying) are all indicators of unhealed childhood trauma.
This is what makes it so insidious; many intelligent, educated, and well-spoken "professionals" are themselves suffering, giving what seems to be good advice. There are many in psychological circles, philosophy and written form.
My mom just keeps shouting at us and beating us for petty things that don't even really matter. One moment she acts like she loves us and the other moment like she hates us which all depends on her mood even if everything is pretty much the same while we try not to do things she doesn't like, she also gives nasty death stares for no reason.
Exactly the same here. Probably she has a personality disorder. Go see a therapist if you can afford; it would help immensely
i think your mother take revenge for your father mistake i guest because i have experience the same things and it so hurts
sounds like a typical brown parent, taking out all of her resentments on her children. Stand your ground and become the man of the house and don't react to her antics. Defeat her terrible attitude with humor and smiles.
Mine was like that too, it was awful. It took years to begin to learn how to act like a normal person afterwards. I wasted my adulthood healing instead of building a career, networking and finding a partner. Her ridiculous behaviour basically ruined my life. I am sorry for anyone else who goes through this same pain.
After reading the comments i realized that my mother is exactly like this . Like she is really good to me when she calls me and i come right away but when i was late helping with groceries she called me all kind of thing and that still eats me
Our dad took revenge on us for things that happened to him at work and had nothing to do with any thing we ever did...
Feelzbad bruh :(
Same, man. Same.
Same
Sounds like a narcissist. Did you mom interfere?
My mom did same half my family narcissist can't trust them
My mom die last year I am free from her abuse
My mom and her siblings was abuse as kids by there mom abd dad so it damge them mentally and emotionally so it happen me and siblings we grow up feel no love feel not safe mom dad divorce when I was baby my dad alcoholic and unfaithful to my mom he will pass child support visit me and sister on weekends when was elementary Middle School he never abused us he always show love he never drunk around us. Come when we were not with him he'll drink and go out to parties ect and middle schooly dad abandoned me and sister cut all contact with us me and sister and family did nothing to him make do that .he got remarried had kids his wife doesn't want him around us
And when was elementary my brother dad abuse my mom and little brother my mom had enough left him she's not a safe her and me and siblings go to to hide out mom did try best to take care of us but her mental issues told over her and her heath got wrost. She die last Jan 2022 after my birthday mom and I did have little good memories because mentally heath took over here moods. My mom stubborn she didn't like to take mood swings and depression meds she says don't work. But me and siblings always cheek up on her make sure she ok we try best be good we did everything make mom happy we was not really bad kids we grow up just being normal some times mom upset us by saying not nice thing to us and arguments us we define are self.she be mad we say some stuff to upset her we never meant it we always told mom sorry mom never apologize to us mom use verbal abuse us when me and siblings kids if we forget do she say she hit us hard give us mark on are legs back
She be upset if try get my sister out of trouble she hit us both she would control us 247 . If we told her how was dad at school or work she say she doesn't care so stop telling mom stuff she never cared me and siblings grow up not feeling love
My mom buy us food clothes school stuff give us Money give place live.
That all we got .my family know my mom abuse us they don't care they didn't report that I was sexual molested when by mom sister new husband they don't believe me
See all this made look love in guys I had different boyfriend's but they toxic so let them ago my teens I didn't party lot I just smoke weed drink alcohol sometimes at my friends kick back party i try coke when I was middle school that one
I never sold my self sex never join gang ever been in jail but was in my 20s I try xtc at friend house my 1 time and again at edm club I only try xtc 5 times that coke 1 time I was my party times
People take revenge for all kinds of things, especially in relationships. They are not intellectually honest enough to see it. The way to transmute revenge is through art, exercise, complaining to friend or just writing it all down. But people aren’t interested in transmuting their anger. The path of least resistance is harming or denying your kids strictly for revenge. That begins a long vicious circle of resentment and revenge in the children that continues for a lifetime. Then sobbing mothers ask 'why won’t my son talk to me?' when their kids are adults.
Jan Scott i feel this way about my mother and i hate myself
i feel this way about my mom and i'm glad i have the emotional strength to do so, don't waste yourself bro
Jordan Peterson is an uber status quo, pro capitalist, who believes no axioms are possible without God, in Jungian pseudoscience, who thinks "intellectuals have been perverted", who's an in-the-closet Christian, who hangs out with climate deniers and denies global warming, who loves retweeting White Supremacists (and debunked global warming blogs), who thinks all postmodernism and taxonomy is a Marxist conspiracy, who can't handle taxonomy itself (too much chaos! Must retreat to simpler times!), who believes in cultural Marxism (an old antisemitic con), who repeatedly courts the alt right and Trumpites, who "struggles to find things of value in Islam" which is a "naturally warlike religion and whom feminists defend because they subconciously want to be dominated by men", who won't touch the fact that contemporary neocolonialism (oft waged by hyper Christians) is deliberately thwarting secularism in Middle Eastern nations by arming and funding islamo fascists and proxy terrorist groups (all for private profit), who thinks marriage should be kept sanctified from gays, and that sex should be enshrined in marriage (outside of marriage women will get raped), who misunderstands the Pareto law in an attempt to "naturalize" exploitation and poverty, who has a wrong and cartoonishly simple understanding of history and economics, who has no understanding of how money is created under capitalism, who can't tell the difference between John Wheeler's Participatory Anthropic Principle and the Copenhagen interpretation of quantum mechanics, who got famous for overreacting to a law which wasn't a law, who echoes the hysteria of trans-medicalist groups, criticises "poor methodology" while belonging to a field which epitomizes it, who would "oppose gay marriage if its what leftists want", who can't handle any contemporary findings in neuroscience or with regards to hard free will, and who behaves like a hilariously cranky old Republican or traditionalist.
Jan Scott same about my dad and now I also hate myself... God damn...
you're not even attempting a compelling argument, now go clean your room!
I'm the mother of a two and a half year old and 9 months pregnant, expecting in two weeks. I've never resonated with something so much before. This is the hardest task I've taken on in life and it helps to have someone say something that makes you stop and look at what you're doing and look at alternatives and a better way of doing things. I could honestly listen to him all day
@Aspen Shipowick Thank you for the kind words 😊 Babe is here, happy and healthy!!!
If parents pull down their kids in front of others, they are also pulling themselves down as well.
That's what my father has been doing lately. I have nothing but respect for the man. He raised 5 of us and I'm the eldest. He's done waaay more stupid shit than me. I'm nearly 32 and just had a healthy split with my lady so I came up here to stay with him. When others are around he tries to act cool. He thinks I'm sad when I'm just looking out the window admiring the nature outside. I haven't got a huge trophy game animal like he has. I don't have kids yet. I can't help but try to get his respect. Don't get me wrong, I usually hunt with cousins but we're road warriors, so we mostly see small game. He likes to walk around and find his trophies...now I'm trying to prove to him that I can get those trophies too. It's not just hunting but other "manly" issues..I can throw a computer together and little nerdy things.
Lately I been hunting like crazy (spot and stalk style) just to show him I could do it too. I know I could do what he can. Easy. I just didn't realize how much it would hurt trying to seek his approval. I've lost a lot of weight and made my first smoked deer hide.
I think I just needed to vent a little. I keep trying to tell myself I don't need his approval. I need to do this for myself because I wanna run my own outfitter on this reservation. I make one mistake and he jumps on the opportunity to say "how do you expect to be an outfitter if you can't _"
Thanks for letting me boo hoo around. After reading what I put down, I just gotta remember what the main goal was in the first place: Start my own outfitter. I just have to keep getting up there to the mountains. In some ways, Mr. Peterson has been a better father to me than my own pops. I just gotta find the right people to get in my corner too. I know a lot people have it waaaaaaaay worse but if my situation helps someone than I'm game. Have a good one peeps.
xTHEMISTOKLESx you hunt animals only for sport and yet you don't eat them.
But slain animals are *NOT* your real achievements or accomplishments. Hunting animal trophies is what most *UNEMPLOYED* people do. Hunting is a losers' hobby, when loser has nothing else. Hunters always have no talents in anything else and makes no contributions to economy.
@@pinklady7184 lemme guess... You're vegan?
@@sgt1terrence sounds like ur parents are similar to mine... The second to last paragraph sounds like infantilization... I understand ur pain somewhat my parents had a plan for me to be a stupid free laborer for my father and they shame me and triangulated as many people as they can to shame me into working under him. I know im talking about myself but I just wanna say i hope ur healing well
@@pinklady7184 shuUuuuut the fuuuuuuck up..I make carne asada, jerky, stews, and other recipes with the game I kill..I also make hides and sell em to my natives who do beadwork..no crazy liberal is gonna change our ways
I love the half end of how you explained that in order to discipline your child the right way you have to understand basically that you have more power than them,in order to curb their behavior in the right way that is ultimately constructive for them in the world
I would like to hear more on parenting from Mr Peterson. Fathers who fail their sons? Mothers who lash out on their children every chance they get? The effects of psychological manipulation on their kids etc
i couldn't agree more. we have a generation of kids who grew up thinking the world is supposed to conform to their individual whims, no sense of personal accountability or scale in their demands, and they are just insufferable.
Or the opposite. Parents who were extremely strict up into high school and college years, and as a result, the kids crash and burn because they are woefully unprepared for the real world.
I find a lot of parents love having children but they hate having teenagers.
"Everyone hates them" and everyone "is happy when they are gone."
Those kids grow up to interact with people the only way they learned and the only way in which they feel comfortable. Thus they act in ways to ensure that even as adults 'Everyone hates them" and everyone "is happy when they are gone."
When people are warm and welcoming and genuinely happy to meet me, I immediately become uncomfortable. I say things to put them on edge. Only when I "win someone over" do I trust them.
I am still trying to figure out my way out of this pattern.
Stephanie Heyens I totally understand that response. It's feels like you want to recoil from an insult because the compliment doesn't fit your own framework of truth.
Stephanie Heyens sup bro, me too... Sadly I see no way out of this yet...
Exposure and practice is a good place to start because socialising is a skill. The better you get at it the better you will feel about it
I struggle with this also, only recently could I accept that trust (of self and others) and hyper vigilance are major factors, I did not trust peoples positive reactions and could not work out/trust the motivations behind them. I agree with James, practise and self validation are paramount.
Edit* factors like ASD in women and symptoms of things like BPD can also contribute. Maybe not those things exactly but I was suprised how much neurochemistry and diet also affects disposition and neurotisism
Holy shit you're me good luck with life!
I think kids really need to be taught the signs of emotional abuse and have resources available to reach out to. I’m 32 and unfortunately crashing with my mom right now. From this perspective I can see why I was terrified of her when I was younger. Unraveling what it did to me has been one of the biggest challenges of my life. Thankful for TH-cam and the education it offers
This is incredible to hear. But from my perspective I'm the undisciplined child trying to find my way readjusting my behavior from childhood. Though I gotta say Dr. JBP here has got some of the best and accurate insights on developmental psychology ive ever heard and it really helps to trace my steps back to where went wrong in my early years.
So true, It has a certain power to look back and realize where the "origin" of current behaviors is. Realize, that my childhood, although it was "happy" lacked structure and discipline. Affecting my current life as a university student.
It's funny, as young people we fear discipline, but a little analysis tells us how to have a father or mother who teach us to sit two hours at a table at the same time every day to review the study of the day, do homework or simply analyze some individual growth project.
Never being the type of child that causes problems resulted in no one in my family instilled discipline (Nobody saw it necessary), I never had a problem in school, I learned how to pass with good grades in schools with minimal effort (Fact that is now destroying me in college by lack of discipline), being introverted and creative made me an asocial; as if that mixture was not in itself volatile, which prevented me from having a stage of rebellion.
This introspective vision leaves me with the desire not only to be a father, but a really good one. (Fact that I plan to perform when I can "clean my room")
J Melchor I can see that being a problem, on the other hand my parents were very hands off too, but in a more neglectful way. They'd never make me bathe, clean or even do homework. I never had other kids over to socialize because I had a twin sister, who has all the same problems I do. We climed trees, fucked with people's backyards at night, even took baby birds out of thier nests (and being heartbroken later to see that they were abandoned and rotting). I was never taught what was good or bad or how to behave. Teachers were constantly fed up with me because i just kept doing shit (not wearing shoes, etc) to give the other kids reasons to bully me. At the age that i was i didnt care because even though i never had friends i always had my twin sister. As an adult I'm literally self sufficient and dysfunctional at the same time. I can figure things out on my own at an amazing rate, but the moment I need to work with others, I'm nearly useless because I literally can't work with someone without trying to push thier buttons eventually.
Tylar Like I said, it has a power to see the problem. I personally am trying to take the bull by the horns in my life. It is not easy or simple because even knowing that the way in which I was raised, the best word to describe being in "automatic", does not represent the totality of my situation or the depth of my problems.
Being introverted, creative led me to spend my adolescence feeling too comfortable in my own mind. To the point that I remember moments in my sixteen where I ran away from parties made by classmates or just never went and stayed at home writing. What boy of sixteen loses the opportunity to explore the forbidden in this way?
And now I'm here, already 22 years old, few friends who literally force me to go to a party. I do not know how to have fun or live, avoiding big decisions, living my life as I was raised, in automatic. And the worst, living in automatic, in theory, has led me to a decent life, but of course I hate it, the feeling that you are a spectator in your own body of a boring life, is depressing.
That is why I decided to take control of my house. Go to the gym and get my body to its best possible version, trying (failing) to bring my mind to its maximum potential through the discipline and research routine. Stop wasting my potential and become what I think I can become.
Hey buddy, just be glad that you're not absolutely repulsive to the people around you whenever you're not consciously trying to be nice. Prioritizing is an essetial part of everyone lives for sure, and I have great faith that you'll do fine someday. Meanwhile in Canada here i have to try to keep my mouth shut whenever I'm in public or else I'll get pinned on hate speech crimes. I saw a man assault his wife in the park once(infront of women and children playing on the jungle gym) and it took everything in my body to not go over and hit the guy, because he was Muslim and i was white so I could have went to jail for defending his wife from him.
I can't get a job because every single time a liberal agenda comes up I tend to sperg the fuck out, literally. I can't help but raise my voice and pace around when i'm mad about stuff (i would NOT be surprised if it turned out i was autistic). I've always said that I have no filter, but the amount of impulsiveness surmounts my ability to stop and thin before I speak. Freudian slips are the death of me that it's come to the point that I don't even bother lieing anymore because 5 mins later I'll just forget mid sentence and tell the truth anyway. I've always considered myself a good person with good values because it takes a near constant conscious effort to control my impulses.
I'm staring to think that I's actually frontal lobe damage too, as I also have short term memory loss. My mom confessed to me a few weeks ago that I had fallen from a car seat in a high van onto my head when i was only 8 months old, and when I was 12 i was choked unconscious from a toy and landed face first on the pavement but was never checked for a concussion. I scares me if this is true because if it is, it happened over a decade ago so the damage is probably not repairable.
Whatever the cause is, is irrelevant, because my efforts at this point are to improve, fixating on the possible cause is not looking forward. The only information that matters is that I know it's an issue and only I will suffer If I don't try to improve it.
I could not say know about it. I'm really not from the north of the continent. This is not even my first language.
I understand the situation of the "PC" culture and general disregard for social standards. But what I can see that transcends borders, is that one is responsible for carrying their burdens and solve their own lives, if not, who will?
The world is too big to waste, I have no plans to be devoured by my own internal problems, not even for the garbage country in which I was born or grew up. (Venezuela). But that prevents me from talking firsthand about that situation. In fact it is hard for me to understand it, where I am from, really even though the socialists / communists try to sell it; There have never been racial tensions, maybe that's the only good thing. So I could not talk about people trying "to be nice", another aspect of my culture, for good and for bad is to reduce importance to everything.
If I have learned something about the relationship with my country, it is that it is good to love it, hate it, miss it, leave it and work for it. But, always one must be first, so what I do is try to stand up, clean my room and explore the world, no matter that they say that everything is already seen, I have not done it.
Managers also do this in the workplace. Boss above him given him agro, but can't complain as fear of losing job, so takes it out on innocent worker below him. As the saying goes, 'shit rolls down hill'.
Parents ... what do they actually know? How many of them know anything at all?!
So easy to procreate, but parenting and modeling are a hell of a skill! And that's love! Not their selfish, impressive words, but the parents' actions towards their kid
I'm now in favor of Dr. Peterson putting together a parenting class and it being integrated into all forms of learning and mandatory in every school everywhere!!
Why mandatory? Knock it off.
I wonder with Dr Peterson's assessment can also be used with regards to relationships. Especially when you get out of college and you're places of "picking up" is online or out at bars. You're meeting complete strangers whom you have no first knowledge about, and so you're initial feelings are predicated on fictitious ideas like physical attraction etc. So you don't necessarily like the person before you claim to love the person, thus there isn't a real solid foundation established!
Well, my 2 years old daughter says "please" and "thank you" for everybody, and so does my 6 years old son. If I let my sister have her way, she would kidnap them every weekend to spend in her house, because she and my 2 nephews adore my children. My concept as a father always has been *love and discipline* - always in equal measure. What they can have I do for them, I give them attention, I play, I kiss, I huge. But no means no.
I’m 17 but this is still fascinating
Keep going man… I’ve always been interested in the intellectual pursuits but I let my ego, drugs, and partying distract me immensely. I’m still only 26 so I caught myself early on during the fall. If I could tell my 17 year old self anything, it would be to stay wild, enjoy life and get those experiences, but be more disciplined with yourself and do at least 1 thing every day that makes you better. All the shit you will inevitably be interested in/drawn to as a young adult (the opposite sex, partying, adventures, etc…) will only be enhanced with a sharp mind. I’m sorry for the rant lol
@@captainomoplata643 hey thanks I really appreciate it, I’m going to screenshot this and print it out so I can look back on it.
@@user-iw1oj6to4r No problem man! If you like Peterson check out Ram Dass as well :) th-cam.com/video/384JqOVi7qA/w-d-xo.html
I was this child. By the grace of God my life is not as terrible as it could be but wow, wow, wow. This is spot on.
'Everyone's lying, and everyone hates them.'
In one sentence.
Man. I want to have kids in the future, but there are so many things that go into raising them that I’m not sure if I will ever do them justice.
We are all just humans. Take 100% responsibility for your actions. And responsibility for your « reactions» when life gives you shitty cards. And you are going to be just fine
First of all you're not raising them. They're not cattle to be raised. You're nurturing them to be the fullest that they can be and that's your parental obligation.
I was playing with kids at a house we were helping.... sword fights.
kid kept hitting me and I told him to not.
I got angry and hit his hand on purpose...
he knew I did it. I lied and said I didn't.
wtf. it's crazy.
JP is right.
"You have to deal with a child so that the worst of you doesn't spill out on them." Good advice for relationships generally.
This is epic in its profundity, but I do have one criticism for the way it's presented (which is obviously out of context)... The exact same thing can happen with over-disciplined children as well and also through no fault of the child's. It's not just undisciplined children whose parents hate them.
I actually ended up weird thanks to this... My dad is not a competent guy, and now Im not either, but Ive been seeing a therapist and I figured out that I actually deepy hoard ungodly amount of bitterness, hatred and resentfullness... And hes not a bad guy, he means well but hes weak and is not a proper man in a sense, and ergo since I was exactly like him as a kid he probably was really vengeful and destructive etc
I dunno why I posted this, but lets just make this a warning to you reader: obey this rule to the fullest. Theres a billion ways to fuck up your kid, but only a few proper ways to raise your kid...
I have the exact same experience with my father. He suffers from extreme anxiety and has rarely ever taken risks in his life, even as a young child I always felt awkward and embarrassed about him. Though we get along now that I'm in my 20s and making my own path in life, there's always that little part of me that feels resentful towards him for simply not being a good enough role model during get the times in my life were I very much needed one.
I just hope and pray that I can break the cycle and be a good father figure for my own children
Jacques Francois and what?? AND WHAT?! DONT LEAVE ME HANGIN' MAN! 😁😁
Jacques Francois oh I get you man, I hope we'll make it :) best of luck to you my friend
I don't wantto be rude but you sound so entitled. He was there, he helped you in more ways than you'll ever know probably, until the day comes you have kids of your own.
Matthew Cooper well first of all: dont worry about "sounding rude". Truth is the truth, and different perspectives exist and may help me or anyone else deal with the current issue. As for the entitlement, Id say youre half right. Id say its probably being a little spoiled aswell. Although I realized that Im oversensitive and I wear my heart on my sleeve, which in turn makes me super vulnerable and irritable, which if left uncheck (and my father, as much good intentions he has, he is definitely bitter and resentfull and vengefull so theres that) leads to even more bitterness and resentment. So yeah, half of it is definitely my character issue
Jordan B Peterson is - The Chosen One.
Freedom is the last thing my parents will want to give me.
I guess that's the difference between western and eastern culture(where discipline is the mantra in the house).
Man that forced smile bit hit home
My mother's prevailing characteristic was vindictiveness.
I think.. being homeschooled for kindergarten and 1st...
made me smarter.. but socially inept. and even spoiled.
so I was an alien in school. left out...
and never at the same social level as others. permanent disadvantage
my mom said kids don't need self esteem.
I think she thought it was pride.
I think socialize the kid between 2 and 4 is a bit late. I would say starting easy after about 14 months, instead of waiting until the "terrible 2" to start your socializing programs. So, yah, 1-5 would be the range, with gradual tapering on both ends. Don't mean to nit-pick. Great stuff from Peterson, as always.
This is a great one
What happens if the mother and the father are both being too much of a monster? I feel that my parents shamed and subtly controlled us. We were disciplined much more often and much more harshly than was normal for the situation. I feel that we were overprotected but even more so overdisciplined. I have real issues with shame today in part because of it. Does Peterson ever talk about this kind of scenario?
Another excellent lecture. Everyone needs some level of this. Even if not on the most extreme end of it. All of it is in there
This is so true.
This so true! As a crap parent I so get this.
Dang, someone admitted to being a crap parent. You’re way better than you think
@@yaboijoel517 I swear, they never admit lol.
Why do some kids behave really well in public situations or at school but reserve all their bad behaviour for home ?
Psymphonicmonk I was also the same kind and now I am pondering.
Well how bad is their behavior? It could be they are just more themselves and comfortable at home or they know what they can and can't get away with at their school and their homes
Opposite for me. I knew I’d get a smack at home but at school I could push the boundaries on what I could get away with.
Well according to what he said in this video, it might be because they learnt that there are consequences for bad behaviour in public or at school, but not at home.
I got three vids in the recommended tab right now. Is this because I'm watching a Jordan Peterson vid?
So, that's not just me then, is it? Seems a little ominous, but maybe I shouldn't get too paranoid immediately, might just be a technical error.
I've seen nothing on the side on other channels. Looks to affect random videos but we all see it.
That's right +Ryley Griggs :P
Be auritative not authoritarian or passive... Simple. Keep it simple.
Don't be a jerk but don't be overly friendly. Say what you mean and be authentic. Be authentic. Be real.
I remember their horrible attitude towards me since I was 2 or 3
Exactly how its been seeing I got walked on for trying to open up about men on aol many years ago.
especially when growing up our dad showed no respect at all, went to far and overstepped our boundaries. perhaps then adults wouldn't have taken advantage of me on aol. but hey who the fuck am i...just a cops kid who's not allowed to speak for themselves.
@@excxmoody I think many cops are living in a fantasy world of ultimate power. I'm thankful for the good cops since for some reason we feel the need to let other people handle our business, but ultimately I think we need a different system of law & order. I currently live in my car and half the time I gotta watch my back for guess what - cops. Because it's illegal to live in your vehicle around here, so be careful where you tilt your seat back! Even though absolutely no harm is being done.
@@mikuspalmis Take care of yourself...look up google certification...just may be able to turn your situation around. Def hear ya though...some good...some...not entirely worthy of the title.
@@excxmoody Thanks.
@@mikuspalmis muscle milk/protein shakes/vitamins will also help. Had helped me a while ago.
Nobody can f up a kid like their parents, that's for sure.
yeah, but how to do that
.... how children test boundries - social rules, etc......
Wonder how he feels on holding kids back a year in school. Ex. 6 yr old going to kindergarten compared to 5 yr old
The ideas here have truth to them, but “don’t let your kids do anything that makes you not like them” (maybe not exact quote) is not the right way to phrase it. What a parent doesn’t like is not necessarily something the child shouldn’t do. Sometimes it’s the parent who needs to change. In the case of some people nowadays, I would even go so far as to say that MOST of the time they don’t like something, it’s not the child who is at fault. Better advice would be to learn to calm yourself and control your emotions, think rationally about how to guide the child well, and set a good example with your own actions. Kids (and people in general, really) usually respond better to gentleness, but there are times when it’s necessary to be stern.
I’m a first time father of a boy who will be turning 2 soon, and it’s more difficult than I expected to figure out how to balance things. I have gotten angry at him at times, and the results haven’t been good. When I remain calm, the results are much better. It takes a lot of patience.
3:53 Everyone around them wears false smiles, every time they go people are relieved when they leave. So they live in a world where everyone’s lying and everyone hates them. That’s it right there. It doesn’t go any further than that.
1:57 what does this mean?
a question: what if we dislike the behavior because we have false expectations about how kids should behave? at least thats what the attachment parenting philosophy promotes. For example, It says that We grownups expect children to not make tantrums and label them as misbehaved children, but tantrums are part of their psychological development and bad behavior is a social construct that comes from not understanding what children really are. I am really confused among these two parenting streams. Any opinions?
What if it's the opposite and the kid is a scared weak person because the parents are abusive and don't let the kid have opinions? I respect parents who encourage children to not take shit from anyone....to an extent. The children are strong.
My mom literally beat my sisters, terrorised is, tried to have sex with our partners. There's no way in hell I can ever forgive her. she sure enough took her anger out on us.
Nowadays there is no way left to discipline a child. Absolutely everything is called abuse sooner or later. Show me just one parent who is never abusive! You can't. And thar is where the discussion ends. It is pointless! Everything is pointless. Putting blame, crying victim and coming up with new terms to call something a type of abuse will not help anyone.
HEROES!
Okay so what's up with my kids...they behave really well in public, and are well liked, but at home is where they can let things fly, and have their 'tantrums'. Oh wait...I do that too😬
Children have no genuine guile... so their inherent nature is to act (very much) like mirrors. Anytime you wonder where a kid picked up something, the answer (parents) is usually not too far away. ;o)
True, like "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree". So the tree had better watch how it behaves!
😸😸😸some parents dislike their kids for every godforsaken reason on earth : the kid's shoes, clothing, hair styles, the way they talk.... From age 6 months, one year, two years and so on.
My older Sister doesn't speak to us because she's jobless. She treats her friends as her family and her family as the enemy. She only speaks to us when she's in need of something. She doesn't even clean or cook and mom doesn't want to interfere. Instead she tells us to do her work because she knows we won't say no. Mom barely questions her and she sometimes gets angry at us for petty things that my older Sister did. She's living life like she's on a vacation and all her expenses are paid for. My younger sister had to move out because she tried counseling her but with no avail and they always argued.
She has many degrees in designing clothes but she doesn't want to get a job. I don't know what to do?
Adult children stop talking to me after I helped them in hugh ways. I told the truth and that made it worse.
Education atleast to the point where you can read and apply on your own. My parents can't read. Uneducated. But I have some been raised atleast to the point where I can read. But they don't change they are same as they were 20 years ago.
Makes me feel uncomfortable with the chaos.
Currently stuck in a very similar situation and am trying to maintain sanity haha.
Hi Jordan, I know this would be cheeky to ask but I think you cover so much great stuff it can be quite overwhelming. I have watched the Maps of meaning 2017 and you shed light on so much relevant info within it blows my mind. I was busy chopping it into pieces to bring it to the public and show them short clips of your work to see how much truth you speak and knowledge you share on what the problem is but how to solve it. I only want to break it down so people spark an interest in your work. An idea I have is, well there are a few and see what you think about them. I am in no position to ask you to do anything or have the right to request such things, I can only share my thoughts and opinions whether they may be valid or not.
1. Make a introduction video on what the whole play list or series is about, what it covers and so on (I will make a minutes section to try and cover it at what time it occurs in the video and then post it in your comment section to help and save you time)
2. Could you give examples of books and tips to help how to become a better speaker, more literate, better reader and writer or what to practice and where to look?(I'm just a plumber trying to evolve and share knowledge but I have always lacked these skills.
3. Could you give brief explanations on the things people suffer with today?
Examples: Commitment, friendship, parenting, PTSD, anxiety, panic attacks, drug use or point us in the right direction. That way I can share you everywhere and pinpoint what people are suffering from and send them expert advice to make them feel like they aren't alone and that there are answers to the problems. It opens them up to it and you are a role model and so easy to listen to. Thank you for all of your work, still going through it ALL trying to learn as much as I can. I'm 34 and never had a father around but this is helping me catch up on things he should have said and explained, even though I seem to be a natural with my nieces. I won't have children until I know the world is a little bit safer and can settle down properly, too busy awakening the world.
Bertrand Russell, Three passions, simple but overwhelmingly strong, have governed my life: the longing for love, the search for knowledge, and unbearable pity for the suffering of mankind.
Thank you for your work and take care
whats the title of the painting in the thumbnail?
what is the song called in the end?
I don't think so it's true
the need to be loved as we are the good and the bad within us but this is hard to find but if parent had it they can give it to their child and i think this is more powerful than the message of the video althogh i love jordan thoughts but i disagree with this although the alternatives are difficult to find but thats the meaning of self awareness and looking for healing and ofcourse god's uncondithional love would be the first clue for healing
Please Jordan mention that you do not support beating your child. I see some comments and they scare me.
What if it’s the complete opposite. So the kid still behaves properly the mother is narcissistic and the child is over disciplined..?
Me on the outside and this is real: My parents are the best people I could ask for!
Me on the inside for real: She stabs my hand but not as in to the point where she reaches my muscles with a fork but to the point where I feel like I can’t breath and where I hyperventilate btw I’m 9 and my dad gets mad at me at night when I get up and need to pee and he shouts at me aggressively I feel abused and idk if you think this is funny or not but I don’t care about what you think since I’m a child but I used to like red but I started to like black which people think is like a depressing color and stuff which I believe to thats why I say my soul is dark to my friends and I also say I have no good things I remember but when I’m around adults I try to act good so that I don’t look bad and so that my parents don’t get mad at me and they might embarrass themselves as if they were unlucky to have me. If you are wondering why I used some bigs words or don’t believe that I’m 9 then not to boast or anything but I’m just a smart asian and always top of my class and I’m in a program for smart kids in my school. If anyone reads this then thank you for using your time to read this.
Best of luck from someone in the same boat.
You definitely are smart. Ask Jesus/Yeshuah to help you.
My father and sister stole from me over 100000 dollars. They won't give them to me and tell me it's not my money to claim. I gave it to them.... They just look into my eyes, the man who helped birth me, and my own blood sister. I looked into their eyes and now i am.... Done.
agreed about establishing healthy boundaries. disagree about the inevitability of parents getting revenge on children. in this scenario their is not an adult and a child but two children. better move is for parents to handle their anger and aggression. better advice is to suggest the family develop a mediation practice. clearly a shame based old paradigm model for parenting here
My parents won. 54 and will be homeless soon. Cut out of the will.
Its true ~=
The one person that disliked this video is a terrible parent.
If you love your child more than anything, more than life itself, then don't hold back with your discipline.
I discipline my son, when he cries afterwords I give him a hug and he hugs me back and says I love you.
I spend all my spare time with my child and we love being together. He knows that I would sacrifice everything for him, so when I disciplin him, he believes me when I tell him what hes doing wrong.
That’s like every Indian parent
but again the limits shoulb be reasonable because if it was too much you will immediatly distroy the kid im talking by experience btw .
The world’s father.
Oh god I'm gonna fucking throw up
There's 1 guy who disliked this video.
THE LORD is good. HIS Son, Jesus Christ is Awesome.
Abusive parents justify their abuse with videos like this
wow who the hell makes you the god of kids ,,,every kid is diffrent ..some things ur spot on about other you are so far off in left field you have no clue
Why do you think he's wrong, would be interesting to hear
Jack got the kernel of truth Right there.