Story 1: UPDATE: We discussed sending this thread to „Mike“ but decided ultimately against it as he first wanted to talk to „Mike“ himself (before revealing that I posted the whole thing on the internet). They met in secret yesterday (Courtney was at work) and Mike broke down crying. It’s been super stressful for him. He had asked his family (especially his mum) to dog sit but Courtney declined. His mother was furious that he would miss my fiancés wedding (she loves him!) but Courtney told her that she had changed her mind and decided to let Mike go but that I then wrote her an offensive and mean message so they decided against it. Mike lost it at that and told his family that she had never allowed him and that my message wasn’t mean at all. He really told her that he wants to go and she should just live with that. She cried a lot and he felt bad. My fiancé told him that he asked another friend of them (who has a little child) to come and he said yes. His wife even asked us if we wanted her and the baby to come (she would understand if that’s too much) but we were happy to also invite them. Mike cried after hearing this and realised that he will NOT attend our wedding now because of Courtney. Today Mike wrote my husband that Courtney told him that she was overreacting because she had the feeling he wouldn’t value the dog and that it’s a good practice thing for a baby. She doesn’t want to apologise to us but would accept if he goes to the wedding. I think Mikes family made very clear that they think she’s crazy for this and she wants to be viewed as a good person. My fiancés said that he won’t change that back and that Mike sadly will miss the wedding because we can’t be sure that there is no more drama with Courtney. I know that this is hard for my fiancé but he hopes that Mike realises now what Courtney will cost him now and the future.
Men can be in controlling/manipulative relationships too, and this really sounds like that. Cutting them off from supportive friendships is a classic example. I hope he gets out before she puppy/baby traps him. You know she’ll use those as tactics to control him further. At least there’s still a lot of time before the wedding for him to come to his senses.
@@GrungeGalacticaYeah... I don't like that people are telling him to "stop being spineless" when we don't know what their relationship is like. She could be emotionally abusive in order to be this controlling. We don't know that. That's why he should just leave her
Therapist here ✌️ so really weird how the therapist in the affair story handled this. A therapist shouldn't be giving advice or telling a client what is and isn't appropriate. They need to help a client find that answer for themselves. If I were counseling this couple, I'd ask OP to explain how her husbands feelings are impacting her, and see how he is able to empathize with that or if he is comfortable making her feel that way for the rest of their lives. Let him answer those questions on his own, rather than just tell him to "wait for a better time"
Yeah.. I was thinking the same thing (my partner is a therapist) and was REALLY thrown off by how many times they said "the therapist suggested", it sounds like this isn't a well studied licensed therapist 😳 At the same time people do have a habit of interpreting things as someone "suggesting" so ya know, always giving the benefit of the doubt
Thanks for coming here and offering a professional opinion on the therapist's behavior. I was wondering if her "suggestions" were a little out of line. The only thing I can is that this is possibly how the OP was interpreting what the therapist said. Perhaps waiting for a better time was something the husband said and the therapist, not giving advice didn't agree/disagree with him, so the OP took it was agreement? IDK.
I usted to have a great therapist as a teenager. She usted to tell me all the time I had to break up with my bf and I always left her sessions crying because I thought she was right. I stopped going to therapy because I thought I had enough answers. And things work out in the end, I broke it off on my own time. 5/6 Years later I went back to her (she was the best therapist I had up to that point) and I realized now with more maturity, she didn’t have the guidance I was looking for. Anyways, broke it off with both of them I guess and now I’m better 😅
@danesinthedaisies Yes, this was my understanding too! It sounded like the "waiting for a better time" comment was 100% the OP's inferrence, and not at all what the therapist said.
Story 3 - at one point the wife says the affair partner caused the damage. No, the husband caused the damage. He’s the one in a marriage and chose to cheat, for years, and is still choosing the affair partner.
He wasn’t thinking about the kids those two years he was with the other woman. I hope she finds the strength to see she deserves some one who wants to fight for her! Kids want there parents happy I promise even if it means separation
To be fair they both did. I never blame the other person unless they know they are the other person. Then it’s both of their fault but still more so the cheater.
At the same time, I cant imagine leaving and being alone with 3 little kids. Its easy to say “better happy parent and alone etc” if you dont have multiple children and dont know how truly hard it is… I have two little kids and let me tell you, if we were to get divorced, we would wait till the youngest kid is at least 5 yo even if we had be just roommates fpr a few years 😂 No way Im raising my little kids alone 😂 unless hes useless at home, then I guess it would be even better to not have him around, but my husband is carrying just as much weight as I am and I cannot imagine doing it all alone 🙈
@veronikapop8161 This will only further a toxic relationship with your kids. As a kid from a dysfunctional fam that shoulve been divorced i hated my parent for that, they made me and my siblings suffer by them staying together. If you think you're thinking "for the children" you're wrong. They will resent you when they get older and asses the situation.
Well, they both caused the damage since the women KNEW he was married and still did it. But yeah, she should’ve mentioned the damage he caused too. It’s hard to do that sometimes though when you’re having so much denial about the situation because of grief. Grief happens in more than just death of a loved one.
UPDATE ON STORY 5: his wife left him and he’s trying to force himself to see her by claiming he wants to see the baby before it’s born? and he want to be allowed into the delivery room without the ex wife’s consent. also for extra context the wife was 21 and he was 30 when they started dating. THIS GUY SUCKS!!!!
I don't trust OP in story 5... The message from the sister sounds like what you'd say if you were trying to help your little sister get out of an abusive relationship without directly pressuring her to leave (as this can alienate the victim).
I agree and someone posted an update in the comments saying the wife left him and now he’s trying to ask for legal advice on Reddit about how can he force her to let him into the hospital room while she gives birth
Oh AND he’s trying to fight for visitation rights to the baby WHILE ITS STILL IN THE WOMB. As in, can I visit my ex wife’s pregnant belly to bully her to get back with me? That’s what that sounds like to me.
Oh the reddit post is a gem. First of all, he was 30 and she was 21 when they started dating. He's been unemployed for 2 years and used his savings, her savings, and sell her car. Also about the baby he says "our efforts" but only the wife was on birth control. In the original post was votted the AH but then he wrote another post saying that his SIL "brainwashed" her wife and that she left him.
This was the comment I was looking for. My parents told me the exact same thing like literally word for word when I asked for help money wise when I was with my now ex. (They even put in their will that he will not get any money) Eventually my rose colored glasses broke and I realized how bad my situation was and left with the help of my parents.
The one with the brother's boyfriend: I hope the brother sees the massive red flags here. His boyfriend flipped from helpful and excited (clearly all about his ego, though) to being intentionally cruel, on a dime. At the first pushback from the sister. Brother should be prepared for the same treatment the first time he and the boyfriend argue.
I feel like the boyfriend is trying to drive a wedge between the siblings. He’s telling the brother things that are making the sister sound like a homophobe and is effectively splitting them apart!
These situations I'd ask brother "How would you feel if I told your boyfriend his wedding suit choiche made him look like a whale? Would that be okay because I love fashion? Or would I be a raging bitch who needs to apologise?" Hope the puppy love fades and only the mean ugliness remains.
As a Danish person who was force fed on H.C Andersen as a child, I just wanted to say that the point of “the Princess on the Pea,” is that she’s being tested to see if she’s a real princess. She proves that she is, by feeling a single pea through 20 mattresses and 20 eider down comforters, and claims to be bruised all over her body. “Only a real Princess could be THAT delicate.”
Story 4: It's a living memorial to OP's dead mother. It's something OP built with her mother that lives. That thing will only get more precious as the years pass. IF the husband didn't know how often OP takes care of the terrarium, that's a red flag on another level. 1) They've been together five freaking years!! 2) Why wouldn't he just text her then instead of messing with it? The fact that he's invalidating her feelings instead of immediately abjectly apologizing, this seems like something sinister is going on. It feels like passive aggressive meanness to me. Like is the husband jealous because OP is successful and considering a job change? This feels like something a childish bully would do, like tear apart your favorite toy, but pretend he doesn't know how it happened. Honestly, I would leave this guy.
You nailed it 100%. It seems like he was mad she left him alone for 8 days to visit her sister/job, and saw the terrarium (that is heavily connected to her family) as the thing to take his anger out on. So petty and cruel, he knows how important it was to her. Then he shows how jealous he is that this terrarium gets her attention when she finds out. He sounds insecure and wants to put the blame on her for his own actions when he can't handle his insecurities.
The whole time hearing story #1 I'm screaming in my head "THE DOG DOESN'T EVEN EXIST YET!!" 😂 I was relieved to hear that addressed in the update. That is some weird behavior on Courtney's part. My gut says insecurities about her relationship and not being at the engagement/marriage stage yet but I would love to hear her side of things.
I am so sorry to that woman whose husband had an affair but she is delusional. Why is she fighting so hard for a man that has clearly shown he does not love or respect her? At this point, the affair woman showed her more respect from her response to her husband than he is himself.
hi, former wife of a partner who had an affair here. Its so hard to explain the feelings you go through with such a wishy-washy partner. my ex would treat me like I needed to make an appointment to have dinner with him, or talk to him because he was with his affair partner (“we are JUST friends, and we only kissed once, get over it”) or friend, but then if I got upset and asked if this was over, was he really even trying, he’d flip the script. Between not eating (shout out to coffee and the four cups a day I had during this), getting maybe 30 minutes of sleep a night for about a month, it put me in such a bad headspace that all I wanted was for him to just stay with me. The more he ignored me, the more I craved his attention and overlooked the nasty ways he was treating me, and I was so scared he’d leave me because he had financial control over me as well. Long story short, I attempted suicide which brought the whole affair into light and *I* was the one shunned, lost my home, my family that I accumulated for ten years of being with him… Looking back, what the *fuck* was I doing?? I should have just cut my losses when I found out that he brought this woman who spent YEARS cultivating a friendship with me just so I’d allow her to move in with us from another state, and they could have their long-planned affair. I should have done so many other things different. But I didn’t. Betrayal trauma is a fucked up thing.
She’s been with him for 20 years. Like no shit. It’s called grief. You go through the stage where you don’t want to believe it. Grief happens in more than just literal death of a loved one.
Can you just change your entire wedding, date and venue and tickets just so I can be my boyfriend's plus one? Oh what a bridezilla coz you're not uprooting your entire wedding for meeeeeeeeeeeee.
For story 5, I have 0 sympathy for the husband. I have a hard time feeling bad for a full-grown able bodied man who is allowing his family to go into debt and suffer rather than taking responsibility for himself. I am not surprised the sister has such disdain towards him.
Exactly this!!! Especially if you're knocking up your 26 year old partner while your 35 fully being supported off her working because you lost your job 2 years ago ☠️
@@jazzenriquez9827What!? TWO years ago!? I thought it was a recent job loss. Wow that guy is a massive pos. I saw what the update comments were saying, but this made him seem worse.
Story 3: not a single word about emotional cheating. If he still has romantic feelings for her that’s cheating in my eyes. He’s so fckn bold to ask to have a friendship with his mistress. The wife was disrespected for two whole years and was graceful enough to try to save her marriage just for that guy to ask if he can still be friends with the mistress. Am I missing something? This is lunacy!
Regarding last story; seasoned mom chiming in, abusing your spouse while pregnant is not okay. Yes, hormones are crazy during pregnancy and I have on more than one occasion lashed out at my partner for something I didn’t like the way he did. After I felt horrible and apologized for it, then worked on ways to recognize those hormone triggers and learned to control them. I hope OP and spouse can learn how to communicate better during this time or pregnant wife will have some couples therapy to deal with after the baby.
Hormones can do crazy things but it's not like they stay as a steady stream. One minute you're crying at a pet store commercial and the next your mad cause all the ice cream sandwiches are gone. That is normal hormonal flux. (Yes both examples were from real life) Being tired and grumpy sure that's normal, so long as she can see it later as being rude/grumpy and apologizes. There is a world of difference between "I'm sorry I snapped earlier I didn't mean to." VS "Sorry hormones you know"
I haven't been pregnant but I have bipolar disorder and I try daily to control my emotions and its hard its okay to not be prefect but effort is required and she seems to be putting in 0 effort. the wife needs to work on stepping away instead of yelling. yelling has no healthy place in a marriage
Update on the pregnant wife and jobless husband story (story 5)! Wife has left him, he is now on legal advice reddit asking if he can force his (soon to be ex-)wife to allow him visitation to the unborn fetus and force his (soon to be ex-)wife to allow him in the delivery room. Absolutely wild.
Not surprised. After hearing about his fragile ego, it made sense why he was unemployed. Perhaps most jobs are "good enough" for him, and he seems he can't swallow his pride to work for other people.
Rule of thumb for wedding guest list: if you haven't seen or heard of a person for a year or more, they will not be invited. Applied also for family members. I didn't even post my engagement, just a photo after the wedding, Who needed to know, knew.
Family therapist here - I would start individual sessions with her and work on self esteem and processing his lost love for her and what she wants for her life and what she wants to show her kids. I would completely pause couples therapy. And I would likely state something about how I don't work on reconciling relationships when one person isn't willing to reconcile (which would involve cutting contact with the affair partner).
The terrarium one: All I can say is, that husband is lucky he didn't become plant food. It takes a certain kind of sickness to ruin something so important to a loved one and then try and make them out to be the villain when you're the one that victimized them
Morgan is right about the abusive couples shouldn’t be going to therapy, I read the same in the book “why does he do that”. It said that narcissists or abusive people tend to be very smart and tricking everyone and if therapist will side with the abuser it will totally crush the victim and they will not seek help for a long time after that.
In the 2nd story, the thought of not being respected because he is more feminine didn't come from his brother's mind, it came from his boyfriend's and his own insecurity. Basically, his brother's boyfriend invested too much energy into something that wasn't his concern; there were thousands of things, he chose the wrong one, and then became frustrated with the time he wasted on something he shouldn't have even researched. And since he's probably young, he may not know how to deal with frustration and ended up blaming the wrong person... As for the brother, he seems to be a very permissive person, with little personal opinion and quite easy to manipulate. He's probably the first person he truly loves. In the end, she's not the asshole, she's just dealing with immaturity and lack of communication from others.
im a gay dude, if my boyfriend said that to my sister it would be curtains on that relationship unless he literally groveled and begged for forgiveness. and even then i'd probably still end it after such a heartless comment.
@@crunchevo8974 I agree, but I also know from my own experiences and those of people around me that when people are extremely people pleasers, whether because they grew up always with others telling them what to think or be, they are extremely easy to manipulate, which is quite dangerous. And when low self-esteem is added, which is often associated, people think they don't deserve more or better 😕. I'm also in a same-sex relationship, and from the moment I noticed that my girlfriend was spending her time sending wedding dresses to my sister, I would already tell her to stop. There are things that no one else should decide but the bride. I don't know what really went through his head to think it was his place to make that decision. Maybe he wanted to be her stylist and tell his friends, "Look, I was the one who dressed her." 😅
to laurens point at 14:10 i think its important to notice the difference between narcissistic and narcissist. i prefer using the former as a description of behavior before ever labelling someones character
exactly. we all have some narcissistic characteristics from time to time it’s just important to acknowledge them and work on them. narcissist would neverrr
Yes thiss. Every single person has been narcissistic from time to time but to call someone a narcissist means that they have NPD. If someone isn’t diagnosed you can’t label them as a narcissist but you can definitely call someone narcissistic
Story 6: I’m currently pregnant, coming into my second trimester. I have had a couple outbursts at my partner myself and I IMMEDIATELY apologize because I realize he does NOT deserve to be treated that way. He is very understanding it’s the hormones and it’s nobodies fault however I always let him know “I’m so sorry, it’s no excuse but it really is the hormones and I am so sorry.” He still is allowed his time to step away because he shouldn’t have to sit there and deal with me being grumpy or upset and let it out on him. I also have the issue of certain smells being to much but I don’t say “THATS DISGUSTING” I simply have asked him to not eat those things around me becuase they’re just too much. You don’t need to be mean about it. Baby mama in story number 6 can be a lot nicer, it doesn’t sound like she is trying.
The terrarium story- if I knew how important that was to my spouse, I would know about it. At the very least, I would google how to manage it. Further, I would consider such a plant a valued part of the house and would have my own appreciation for it.
Okay....I don't normally comment on these BUT story 4 just upsets me. As a person who cries when I kill my OWN plants by accident, I would be so upset! My husband doesn't touch my plants because he knows how much they mean to me and that I know what they need. He will mention when one looks not healthy or if he realizes that I haven't watered them for a while, BUT he doesn't touch them. I have a plant that his grandma gave me and I have a cactus from my parents. I just look at my plants as well, even have our cat in the habit of wanting to be picked up to sniff them. That story upsets me as a plant mom...
Yes, there was something weird there, my husband is exacly like that too, he will not touch them, but we will ask if everything ok with some if he thinks it looks weird... I remember when I was going to be fine for two weeks and I told him he had to water plan in study he was like "why??? If you water them before leaving they will be ok" 😂 I said he is right but everyone expect this one, this one you have to water a lot more in summer... He totally dosen't understand why even people want to have plants etc like ot isn't something that he feels need for or care, but when I say "oh I need to go buy new soil" we only ask when. It is simple like that he may don't care but I care and he wants me to be happy. we actually have to much plants but everytime a see something wow and I look at him he know it is going home with US and dosen't say anythinig. When I lost my beautiful flower center of table, he asked if I want new one bc I was so sad... There is something wrong in this story, he did it for reason...
1st story: Courtney does NOT want to go to the wedding. She wants a free trip to Italy hence why she doesnt want to bring the dog because it would restrict what SHE wants to do
I don`t think so. They probably live in a neighboring country. If I had a car I`d be in italy in 4 hours easy. I`m austrian. They don`t say getting married in italy if it`s their country. But 4 hours road trip, definitely in the neighborhood maybe even living here. so not the big deal Americans make it out to be.@@hondacrv6959
There was an update to the story where the best man's whole family was shocked and turned on him for encouraging what Courtney did. Best man is also starting to question the relationship. She tried backtracking and begging they invite him back but the groom said no and everyone's praying ex best man will learn a good lesson about Courtney and the kind of effect she has on his life.
oh yeah now I remember thanks for the update. Didn`t he say he wantst o be the best man after all and they said sorry we picked someone else now can`t risk you changing your mind again?@@availanila
Yep he definitely did it to crush her, all those precious memories it holds too?! a simple text or google would’ve clarified any doubts. If he’d have just left it alone & done nothing, they could’ve gone on their trip no prob. Sounds like she’s told him all this info, so either he didn’t care enough to listen/remember or he knew how important it was to her and did it maliciously. Either way, bad. Take the job and run girl!
I kill plants. It's not intentional- I'm just never able to keep them alive. I have a lucky bamboo that I've managed to keep alive for over a year, but I've brought in several other plants annnnd they're pretty much dead, despite all my best efforts. I don't bring new plants into the house anymore. My point is that I, a serial plant killer, would still know not to freaking pour cup after cup of water into a terrarium. What in the hell.
The terrarium story: its giving im unhappy your looking at moving across country so im going to damage something of yours to show how unhappy i am and then blame it on you so we dont move and i dont have to be honest about my feelings.
First Story: Courtney is unbelievable. Like I get it, you want to go to the Wedding with your partner but its not about you. Your partner is the best man in the wedding. Why would you give him an ultimatum on something like this. My fiancé got to go to a wedding in Australia and I couldn't go. Was I sad? Yes! But I didn't threaten him to stay behind or I'll leave him.
She wants everything to be about her, she's totally jealous her boyfriend is best man and she's not part of the bridal party. TBF she seems like the type to wear white so op is better off.
Also my brother told me the day after he got married he had a registered ceremony because it was my sis in law's nans wish before she died. Not to attend. Just they be married before my nephew was born. So they had 2 witnesses, and I was like ok. It would have been nice to go but I can also see why he did it. I wasn't like how dare you. I'll never speak to you again.
Right?! I haven’t been able to go to so many things with my man before! It sucks of course but I would never even begin to think of making someone feel bad about ME. You can feel bad but don’t get mad. And it’s a wedding with only 4 people invited!!! How selfish to make it about you?! Like Lauren said I’m curious to see Courtney’s side.
as someone whose first language isn´t english i never know when y'all say things wrong or catch grammar errors, sometimes y'all even pronounce words like me and to be honest y'all have expanded my vocabulary even further so i never get why people get upset, thanks for your hard work!!
Small thing about your comment: your apostrophe is in the wrong place in y'all! Y'all is short for "you all" so the apostrophe goes after the Y instead of the A!
The terrarium story- no wayyyyy this was done to be “helpful” he said wanted it gone and took this opportunity while she was gone and couldn’t fix it immediately this is bsssssssss
I think the affair he got dumped by the affair because maybe she thought they were going to get divorced and he never did And probably she said he has to come clean and work on his marriage if he won’t get divorced That’s why he’s insisting so much, because he is still in love with her, but she is disappointed and doesn’t care about him another but wants him to do “the right thing”
Story 2: OP needs to pull the uno reverse and tell her brother that a man, effeminate or no, assuming he has the authority to tell her what to wear on her wedding day is actually deeply misogynistic. His boyfriend was so disrespectful and showed his own prejudice. He doesn't respect her, full stop. If he's trying to be a fashion critic he needs to use design & industry language, not cheap shots at her weight and taste.
For story 5. I also suffered from Hyperemesis Gravidarum. Even if you plan a pregnancy you will not know if you’ll have HG until it happens. I had a surprise pregnancy and got hg, and my kidneys started to fail, I was bed bound for 22 weeks. I lost 50lbs. It’s incredibly dangerous pregnancy. Stress makes it worse as well so having her sister be able to alleviate that stress by providing for her is so helpful. By him trying to give it back will only increase stress and increase risk for the pregnancy.
For stories one and two (only ones I’ve seen so far) I think this is the narrative (that personally I find very toxic) that you pick your partners side over everything. Really the narrative should be in every situation decide what YOU think is right and communicate that in a respectful and kind way to everyone involved. Sometimes my partner and I disagree and we consider it part of our jobs to say ‘I see where that other person is coming from on this’ and we are in a healthy respectful relationship so no one gets mad when that happens.
Narcissist is not at all an “open ended” term, it’s a clinical diagnosis with specific criteria that you need to meet in order to be diagnosed. I hate the way social media has turned clinical terms into catchy little insults to throw around.
The first story… the girlfriend sounds abusive. The groom needs to check on his best man & see if he needs help. Okay and the second story… the boyfriend sounds like he’s trying to cause issues so he can eventually isolate the brother. Or he’s insane or both. Everyone needs help
Totally agree, I feel like people unfamiliar with abuse don't keep such a keen eye on the little signs, and these people are planting not-so-little red flags left and right.
Omg the terrarium story!! I built one in middle school that lived untouched for 6months with a fish and plants too!! My dream is to build a big one with a ceiling skylight through the top of it when I get a house one day :)
Last story: currently pregnant with my second baby. Pregnancy and post partum rage are real and need to be addressed in therapy. I never experienced those issues, but OP is right there’s no excuse for the abuse. His wife is not self regulating during hormonal episodes, and worse is that she doesn’t seem to think it’s important. With my first pregnancy I was SO PARANOID about my husband. He made new guy friends and I somehow convinced myself that he wasn’t interested in me or the baby anymore. It was so real to me. Fortunately my therapist noticed and helped me figure out how to recognize the paranoia and combat it myself. So long story short I felt remorse that my husband felt on the defensive all the time, and I worked to fix it. This pregnancy I’ve stayed ahead of the paranoid mood swings. I can’t understand how OP’s wife has no interest in being better, but I hope they figure it out together.
Yup I was emotional when I was pregnant when I was being too much, I apologize to my husband and took a nap. I did yell at him a few time about him washing his latch containers, are certain foods, but I leaned to control myself. Because it’s not fair to him but he did start washing his dishes, and foods I didn’t like when he cooked them he cooked outside. We have a camping stove so he would cook outside. I would apologize for being too much, but he said it’s OK. But abuse is never ok Pregnant or not, if that’s the case, people with. PTSD have a lifetime excuse. If they happen to be abusive.
Last story: I want to provide insight as someone who went to family therapy and had that used by my dad to further the abuse on me. The therapists don't know. If the abuser is smart enough to do it like that, the therapist does not know. Because a teenager reacting to abuse looks a lot like mood swings when the abuse isn't visible. An adult reacting to a partner's abuse looks a lot like they're the problem when the abuse isn't visible. Someone who's abused is likely to hide the abuse even more than the abuser. It feels embarrassing, humiliating. And I hid way too much abuse done by my parents and then some of the partners I've had as an adult.
Hey guys! I love your show and the 5 of you. I'm a therapist, and it's pretty standard that there is usually NO couples therapy in relationships where DV is present. The couple would likely be pushed towards individual therapy. This is for everyone's safety. I've worked for lots of organizations and this has always been the policy. Just thought I would let you guys know.
I love how Morgan always says these sayings with such confidence and seriousness. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But it's always funny to me how serious she is about them 😂
Morgan I know you mentioned going on Say Yes to the Dress 37:28 but I think you should look up the legal battle between Hayley Paige and JLM Couture (Kleinfeld, where the show is recorded). I'm not trying to tell you what to do, just provide information. They are filing for bankruptcy due to their actions. Imo I believe you would want to know before going.
Story 3- he should just leave, he still loves her .. he doesn’t want to be FRIENDS with her. He still wants her .. from someone who came from “kids are older divorced parents” just do it now.
Story 2: after that white whale comment I wouldn’t have replied and that would honestly be the last time I would ever talk to my brothers boyfriend. He would’ve been left on read and blocked.. and un-invited to the wedding. I don’t understand why people entertain that behavior. A person like that deserves nothing but silence.
Story 2: I had multiple people say I looked "fatter" in my wedding photos than I did at the time I shared photos, and a "friend" thought I was pregnant in my wedding photo that I had as a profile pic. Needless to say I couldn't even look at my wedding photos for a very long time, because I was very insecure about my body. Which is a shame because I made my wedding dress, which was always a dream of mine, and now I thought I messed up lol. It sucks we let people drag us down when they are obviously miserable themselves or jealous, but words can have a big impact. I hope OP's brother sees the light and makes the right choices concerning his sister. NTA
for anyone considering going to the tht shows it’s so worth it!! my sister and i went and it was one of our favorite outings morgan, lauren, and justin were incredible i would 100% go to another show and recommend others go !! :)
There's definitely been Say Yes to the Dress episodes where the groom was at the appointment. They always have the dramatic stop, and the cameras go to the consultant's face being like, "Are you sure??" And then Laurie in a solo scene talking about why its a bad idea
For story 5, the pregnant wife left him and now he's asking if he can have visitation rights to the child while it's still in the womb and if he can force her to let him be in the delivery room
that's insane. and no and no. also she'll probably get full custody and he'll possibly get visitation rights with supervision IF the wife is generous. but like damn that's gross.
Story 1: I just realized why my dog has separation anxiety because of this podcast! I never thought about it but when my dog was a puppy was when everything shut down during Covid and I was doing school from home so he was never separated from me 🥲
Kourtney reminds me of the fights my sister and I used to have when we were 7/10 "If we ever get a mansion I get to have the biggest room" "No why do you get to have the biggest room??? MOM!!!!!!!"
Right? I remember a friend in school that would ask weird hypothetical questions, I think we were more like 13 but still pretty young, and she'd get upset if people didn't answer how she wanted. Some of those questions were actually kinda creepy, one in particular really sticks out where she'd asked me if she died tomorrow would I go to her funeral? When I said yes but that's a weird thing to ask she got upset that I "called her weird". I learnt after a while there's no pleasing someone like that, they are actively looking to be upset by something & cause drama. I get the feeling Courtney is similar, that there will always be some drama or another going on in her life.
i understand lauren saying that people could hold 'favours' against one SO MUCH. my mom is a narcissist and she has always been about her image to others but i was treated like absolute shit since my parents separated. i had a stroke a couple years back (at 22) and she took care of me and i'm thankful for that but BOY she has used that against me SO much and will do forever. i hate that and i hate that any kind of kindness from anyone scares me.
I'm so sorry for what you've gone through, my story is almost identical to yours. I had a TIA at 26yrs old & my narc (now ex) husband looked after me but always held it against me. My mother is exactly the same & I can't escape it cos I gotta live with her, after my divorce, I became homeless due to never being able to afford my own home (I'm a millennial) & I do my best to avoid her but she always gives me backhanded compliments, followed with threats of throwing me out. Unfortunately, my father receives the same abuse from her. She does have terminal cancer & whilst I don't wish her harm, I can't wait for the day I'm free of her narcissistic wrath😮💨
@@emilyemily444 i also live with my mom because renting is hard in my country too and we dont talk... it's been 2 years... it's hell. i'm so sorry too. i wish you the best.
Am I the only one who finds Morgan & Lauren’s grammar/saying mix ups, accents and math butchering adorable and endearing 💕☺️ Haters gonna hate! This episode of THT is literally going to get me through the day!
The last story makes me so sad. You can definitely be understanding with a pregnant spouse, but if there's yelling and insults every day along with no remorse/real apologies afterwards, I hope I would have the strength to leave that situation.
as someone who was cheated on in my previous relationship, leaving him was the best decision i made. i was able to heal and find happiness and then met the girl i plan to marry
For the terrarium story - I would legitimately be considering something extreme. Whenever I leave on a trip I leave extremely detailed written instructions on how to care for my plants, aquariums, and cat, even though my partner has lived with me for years and knows how to care for them perfectly. But I still do it out of extreme caution. If I came home from a trip and something I loved in that way was moved/touched/ruined I would be upset. A sincere apology would usually suffice. But the lack of apology and ACCUSATION of frivolity ….. I would consider never speaking to them ever again.
Story #4 reminds me of a TikTok I saw where this lady had to go away for a week and asked her husband to take care of her prized hydrangeas. He didn't water them for TEN DAYS and she came back to them wilted and dying. Her hydrangeas were the focus of her TikTok account and she put so much effort and care into them only for her husband to kill them seemingly the first chance he got.
Tried to see this isn’t duplicated. Update Story 3: “She is this desperate. She is a repeat poster. He wanted a divorce and was leaving and she threatened to keep his kids from him or make coparenting hell so he stayed. She stopped adding it into her new posts because it got so much backlash. She makes a new post weekly and ignores all advice. I have no fucking clue why she posts other than for attention. She uses throw aways. Sometimes she'll use the same throw away more than once, but she eventually deletes them and the posts and makes a new one. Maybe I should start saving them and archive them but I don't want to get that invested in her crazy.”
14:42 Such a good point! Words become so overused that the meaning of those words slowly diminish, especially mental illnesses. Narcissism is a personality disorder, but people throw the word around so quickly
Speaking from my own experience. As someone who just recently went through pregnancy, I can say it’s definitely like Rebecca from This Is Us. You have times where you lash out and can’t control your emotions at the time but once everything settles, you can see where you are wrong. You aren’t 100% a completely different person where you once were able to apologize and acknowledge when you are wrong and now you can’t. It’s definitely something they need to work on in therapy because postpartum is essentially the 4th trimester and postpartum rage, anxiety and depression are a thing.
Story 6: I feel like you guys were so light-hearted on this story and it deserved more concern. An adult woman, qnd in general person, should not completely let their hormones control them. She is actively hurting her husband and I think this story wasnt treated as serious. This is just how I felt, I love you guys but that just felt weird.
Her, wife, OO is a women, in comments later she said she was pregnant before and this didn't happen to her and she had hormonal changes but not that extreme, and she dosen't know what to do anymore bc as women she wants to support but as partner she feel abused... But I agree with you, I'm actually very mean person when my hormons take over my body (read: every month) But I know it like I know I'm very mean innthis time do I remove myself from situations that can trigger some tsunami of words, but I'm too late to bite my tounge, I say i'm sorry bc people don't deserve it and O know it and I say please leave me alone for a while, when I feel like the wave is gone we can talk, etc. It is scary actually bc sometimes I say things faster then I can think, but also bc I don't see at first it, when it startseit stards with little things and I don't see them, only after few of them I get that it started ( it is more like silent treatment, death' stare, b* face, easly irritated, the little things,
The terrarium guy MAKES ME SO INFURIATED. He definitely threw a little boy fit because she "abandoned" him. Some men are like this. He purposely ruined something beautiful to her. He was mad that she got a big job offer, was traveling for an extended time, and had special things, so he ruined it on purpose. And in a way that could be played off as doing "something nice". I am so happy she canceled the plans. Divorce him
story 3 - do NOT EVER stay together "for the kids" then divorce when they're grown, that is SO MUCH SIGNIFICANTLY WORSE for your children!! the younger the child, the better they can comprehend and cope, if ur unhappy with ur marriage, staying together "for the kids" actually makes adulthood transition significantly harder and can make affected adult children feel completely displaced and like they're losing their childhood. negative impacts of divorce typically go away within 3 years after the fact with most children - the actual divorce event may be difficult, espcially if parents choose to put their children in the middle and try to pull info out of them or shittalk the other parent - but what occurs after will not be as negative as some of yall are convinced it will be.
I absolutely love orchids. I have desperately tried 3 times to keep orchids alive. I watched endless hours of videos on tips, best practices, etc., i bought the right tools, pots, potting medium, fertilizer, and everything! I always made sure to steralize everything before trimming or repotting, but they still all died on me. I was devistated every single time and decided to give up trying.
2nd story hit close for me because I always envisioned my brother walking me down the aisle when I got married since our dad passed, but now we aren’t even speaking because of a manipulative girlfriend that came between us
For doing destination weddings you can reach out to those most important and check if they are willing/able to come before diving into planning. That's what my partner and I have done, we started talking about doing a cruise wedding recently but before any planning we've each checked in with parents, siblings and out best friends, the people we couldn't imagine our day without, to make sure they were onboard. Of course we plan to invite other friends and family but it will be okay if they aren't there so long as the others are.
Just have to say, stumbling upon this video this morning and absolutely love the princess and the pea reference. Just so happens to be a time where my children's school is putting on a play about the princess and the pea.!! ❤
The article mentioned in the last story reminded me of how Jonah Hill would use so much therapy jargon on his girlfriend. Man was manipulative AF, in the name of "therapy".
@rosewein I don't agree...he told her I don't like this, this and this if you don't agree then cool we are not going to workout. He set the boundary and told her I understand if you can't understand but then we won't work out
It is semantics I guess. But really he could of just said I don't think we are going to work out. If she had asked why I could see the reason for that list, she either changed (which is control) or she wasn't good enough for him which is kinda abusive language. It's a stubtle but I think Important difference.
@rosewein you're funny! Semantics, ha! So if I'm understanding correctly because he did what most women ask of men which is be "clear with me" (aka talk to me) instead of playing games it's somehow controlling? And somehow you also assume he was in some way telling her she wasn't good enough? Lmao delulu is strong with you. He just told her I'm not comfortable with any of this if you can understand great I appreciate it and we can continue otherwise I think it's best we go our separate ways. I don't want to argue in my relationship because this will be on ongoing issue. That is a healthy relationship one where you can express how you feel and also understand that if you cannot see eye to eye or compromise it's best to go your own way and find someone you match better with. He did she can too. Who is to say, neither of us know, whether she also expressed her own boundaries in their relationship.
Story one: as someone who has not attended a wedding of BIL for my dog.... the girlfriend is the a hole. My dog was DYING (passed away two weeks post wedding) my husband still went for the weekend, I felt awful not being able to attend so was sure to send a note along with their gift with my husband. Everyone understood completely and I knew I made the right choice for my pack (also had another VERY, 15 yrs senior dog I am blessed to still have) We were sure that we gave them MONTHS in advance notice, and my husband (his brother) still attended.
Also on another note that same brother and his previous wife DID basically this but over the bridesmaid dress. 2 days before our wedding his brother and now ex wife let us know they would not be attending our wedding because she didn't like the dress..... or me. We had been together for 6 years and she would get mad I was always considered family "even though we weren't married" (they were together 5 yrs from dating to divorce 🫠)
I honestly don't understand when people bring up certain mistakes. But what is the point. If I hear it I just make a comment to myself in my car when I'm alone and move on with my day.😂
If someone would try to take away you being the best man for your best friend, i mean come ON. The reason shes doing this, isnt just over the dog for a two day trip, that sounds insane. Shes doing EVERYTHING in her power to stop this and thats sick. Her control here is sick
Story 1: UPDATE: We discussed sending this thread to „Mike“ but decided ultimately against it as he first wanted to talk to „Mike“ himself (before revealing that I posted the whole thing on the internet).
They met in secret yesterday (Courtney was at work) and Mike broke down crying. It’s been super stressful for him. He had asked his family (especially his mum) to dog sit but Courtney declined. His mother was furious that he would miss my fiancés wedding (she loves him!) but Courtney told her that she had changed her mind and decided to let Mike go but that I then wrote her an offensive and mean message so they decided against it. Mike lost it at that and told his family that she had never allowed him and that my message wasn’t mean at all. He really told her that he wants to go and she should just live with that. She cried a lot and he felt bad.
My fiancé told him that he asked another friend of them (who has a little child) to come and he said yes. His wife even asked us if we wanted her and the baby to come (she would understand if that’s too much) but we were happy to also invite them. Mike cried after hearing this and realised that he will NOT attend our wedding now because of Courtney.
Today Mike wrote my husband that Courtney told him that she was overreacting because she had the feeling he wouldn’t value the dog and that it’s a good practice thing for a baby. She doesn’t want to apologise to us but would accept if he goes to the wedding. I think Mikes family made very clear that they think she’s crazy for this and she wants to be viewed as a good person. My fiancés said that he won’t change that back and that Mike sadly will miss the wedding because we can’t be sure that there is no more drama with Courtney. I know that this is hard for my fiancé but he hopes that Mike realises now what Courtney will cost him now and the future.
I hope Mike grows a backbone
@@talau2370 Maybe, it looks like he's definitely being told by his family and friends that her behaviour isn't ok. Hopefully he'll see it too.
I hope Mike breaks up with her and pays his way to go to the wedding.
Men can be in controlling/manipulative relationships too, and this really sounds like that. Cutting them off from supportive friendships is a classic example. I hope he gets out before she puppy/baby traps him. You know she’ll use those as tactics to control him further. At least there’s still a lot of time before the wedding for him to come to his senses.
@@GrungeGalacticaYeah... I don't like that people are telling him to "stop being spineless" when we don't know what their relationship is like. She could be emotionally abusive in order to be this controlling. We don't know that. That's why he should just leave her
Therapist here ✌️ so really weird how the therapist in the affair story handled this. A therapist shouldn't be giving advice or telling a client what is and isn't appropriate. They need to help a client find that answer for themselves. If I were counseling this couple, I'd ask OP to explain how her husbands feelings are impacting her, and see how he is able to empathize with that or if he is comfortable making her feel that way for the rest of their lives. Let him answer those questions on his own, rather than just tell him to "wait for a better time"
Yeah.. I was thinking the same thing (my partner is a therapist) and was REALLY thrown off by how many times they said "the therapist suggested", it sounds like this isn't a well studied licensed therapist 😳 At the same time people do have a habit of interpreting things as someone "suggesting" so ya know, always giving the benefit of the doubt
Thanks for coming here and offering a professional opinion on the therapist's behavior. I was wondering if her "suggestions" were a little out of line. The only thing I can is that this is possibly how the OP was interpreting what the therapist said. Perhaps waiting for a better time was something the husband said and the therapist, not giving advice didn't agree/disagree with him, so the OP took it was agreement? IDK.
I'm a therapist too and I came here to say the same thing!
I usted to have a great therapist as a teenager. She usted to tell me all the time I had to break up with my bf and I always left her sessions crying because I thought she was right.
I stopped going to therapy because I thought I had enough answers. And things work out in the end, I broke it off on my own time.
5/6 Years later I went back to her (she was the best therapist I had up to that point) and I realized now with more maturity, she didn’t have the guidance I was looking for.
Anyways, broke it off with both of them I guess and now I’m better 😅
@danesinthedaisies Yes, this was my understanding too! It sounded like the "waiting for a better time" comment was 100% the OP's inferrence, and not at all what the therapist said.
Story 3 - at one point the wife says the affair partner caused the damage. No, the husband caused the damage. He’s the one in a marriage and chose to cheat, for years, and is still choosing the affair partner.
He wasn’t thinking about the kids those two years he was with the other woman. I hope she finds the strength to see she deserves some one who wants to fight for her! Kids want there parents happy I promise even if it means separation
To be fair they both did. I never blame the other person unless they know they are the other person. Then it’s both of their fault but still more so the cheater.
At the same time, I cant imagine leaving and being alone with 3 little kids. Its easy to say “better happy parent and alone etc” if you dont have multiple children and dont know how truly hard it is… I have two little kids and let me tell you, if we were to get divorced, we would wait till the youngest kid is at least 5 yo even if we had be just roommates fpr a few years 😂 No way Im raising my little kids alone 😂 unless hes useless at home, then I guess it would be even better to not have him around, but my husband is carrying just as much weight as I am and I cannot imagine doing it all alone 🙈
@veronikapop8161 This will only further a toxic relationship with your kids. As a kid from a dysfunctional fam that shoulve been divorced i hated my parent for that, they made me and my siblings suffer by them staying together. If you think you're thinking "for the children" you're wrong. They will resent you when they get older and asses the situation.
Well, they both caused the damage since the women KNEW he was married and still did it. But yeah, she should’ve mentioned the damage he caused too. It’s hard to do that sometimes though when you’re having so much denial about the situation because of grief. Grief happens in more than just death of a loved one.
UPDATE ON STORY 5:
his wife left him and he’s trying to force himself to see her by claiming he wants to see the baby before it’s born? and he want to be allowed into the delivery room without the ex wife’s consent. also for extra context the wife was 21 and he was 30 when they started dating. THIS GUY SUCKS!!!!
crazy how he went from saying he’d take accountability to just saying his sil is “brainwashing” his wife. so happy she left, she deserves better.
@@juliaortiz6483seriously! i knew something about that story rubbed me the wrong way and with the extra context i felt so validated.
Where did you find this info
@@Anna92781probably from the actual Reddit story
edit- its actually on OP’s profile, he’s in other subs asking for advice which is where it came from
He was also mooching off a woman 9yrs his junior.
I don't trust OP in story 5... The message from the sister sounds like what you'd say if you were trying to help your little sister get out of an abusive relationship without directly pressuring her to leave (as this can alienate the victim).
I agree and someone posted an update in the comments saying the wife left him and now he’s trying to ask for legal advice on Reddit about how can he force her to let him into the hospital room while she gives birth
Oh AND he’s trying to fight for visitation rights to the baby WHILE ITS STILL IN THE WOMB. As in, can I visit my ex wife’s pregnant belly to bully her to get back with me? That’s what that sounds like to me.
Oh the reddit post is a gem. First of all, he was 30 and she was 21 when they started dating.
He's been unemployed for 2 years and used his savings, her savings, and sell her car. Also about the baby he says "our efforts" but only the wife was on birth control.
In the original post was votted the AH but then he wrote another post saying that his SIL "brainwashed" her wife and that she left him.
Could be drug abuse too
This was the comment I was looking for. My parents told me the exact same thing like literally word for word when I asked for help money wise when I was with my now ex. (They even put in their will that he will not get any money) Eventually my rose colored glasses broke and I realized how bad my situation was and left with the help of my parents.
The one with the brother's boyfriend:
I hope the brother sees the massive red flags here. His boyfriend flipped from helpful and excited (clearly all about his ego, though) to being intentionally cruel, on a dime. At the first pushback from the sister.
Brother should be prepared for the same treatment the first time he and the boyfriend argue.
100%. he should want to be helpful to bond, not for an ego boost
YES!!!! I was literally screaming at the screen for this one. 😂😅
I feel like the boyfriend is trying to drive a wedge between the siblings. He’s telling the brother things that are making the sister sound like a homophobe and is effectively splitting them apart!
Hopefully that all happens before its too late to save the brother sister relationship.
These situations I'd ask brother "How would you feel if I told your boyfriend his wedding suit choiche made him look like a whale? Would that be okay because I love fashion? Or would I be a raging bitch who needs to apologise?" Hope the puppy love fades and only the mean ugliness remains.
As a Danish person who was force fed on H.C Andersen as a child, I just wanted to say that the point of “the Princess on the Pea,” is that she’s being tested to see if she’s a real princess. She proves that she is, by feeling a single pea through 20 mattresses and 20 eider down comforters, and claims to be bruised all over her body. “Only a real Princess could be THAT delicate.”
I swear that story was a dig at princess and queen. I always got the "oh brother these two suck!" from the story.
@@availanila It is a dig royalty for sure.
Thank you! I got so confused when they butchered the moral of the story 😅
I was gonna say I'm pretty sure the moral of that story was "don't judge a book by its cover" and wasn't sure how they used it in this context 😂
hahah okay so I need to read this apparently
Story 4: It's a living memorial to OP's dead mother. It's something OP built with her mother that lives. That thing will only get more precious as the years pass. IF the husband didn't know how often OP takes care of the terrarium, that's a red flag on another level. 1) They've been together five freaking years!! 2) Why wouldn't he just text her then instead of messing with it? The fact that he's invalidating her feelings instead of immediately abjectly apologizing, this seems like something sinister is going on. It feels like passive aggressive meanness to me. Like is the husband jealous because OP is successful and considering a job change? This feels like something a childish bully would do, like tear apart your favorite toy, but pretend he doesn't know how it happened. Honestly, I would leave this guy.
You nailed it 100%. It seems like he was mad she left him alone for 8 days to visit her sister/job, and saw the terrarium (that is heavily connected to her family) as the thing to take his anger out on. So petty and cruel, he knows how important it was to her.
Then he shows how jealous he is that this terrarium gets her attention when she finds out. He sounds insecure and wants to put the blame on her for his own actions when he can't handle his insecurities.
The whole time hearing story #1 I'm screaming in my head "THE DOG DOESN'T EVEN EXIST YET!!" 😂 I was relieved to hear that addressed in the update. That is some weird behavior on Courtney's part. My gut says insecurities about her relationship and not being at the engagement/marriage stage yet but I would love to hear her side of things.
SAME!!!
@@mae_liii oh wow… I think it was more along the lines of insecurities. I really hope he didn’t fall for her manipulation tactic
I am so sorry to that woman whose husband had an affair but she is delusional. Why is she fighting so hard for a man that has clearly shown he does not love or respect her? At this point, the affair woman showed her more respect from her response to her husband than he is himself.
Sadly when people are in a long line of being treating like this they stop seeing the issues..
hi, former wife of a partner who had an affair here.
Its so hard to explain the feelings you go through with such a wishy-washy partner. my ex would treat me like I needed to make an appointment to have dinner with him, or talk to him because he was with his affair partner (“we are JUST friends, and we only kissed once, get over it”) or friend, but then if I got upset and asked if this was over, was he really even trying, he’d flip the script. Between not eating (shout out to coffee and the four cups a day I had during this), getting maybe 30 minutes of sleep a night for about a month, it put me in such a bad headspace that all I wanted was for him to just stay with me. The more he ignored me, the more I craved his attention and overlooked the nasty ways he was treating me, and I was so scared he’d leave me because he had financial control over me as well.
Long story short, I attempted suicide which brought the whole affair into light and *I* was the one shunned, lost my home, my family that I accumulated for ten years of being with him… Looking back, what the *fuck* was I doing?? I should have just cut my losses when I found out that he brought this woman who spent YEARS cultivating a friendship with me just so I’d allow her to move in with us from another state, and they could have their long-planned affair. I should have done so many other things different. But I didn’t. Betrayal trauma is a fucked up thing.
She’s been with him for 20 years. Like no shit. It’s called grief. You go through the stage where you don’t want to believe it. Grief happens in more than just literal death of a loved one.
Let’s not be so rude. You’re “im sorry” doesn’t change how rude you sound.
Codependency
Can you just change your entire wedding, date and venue and tickets just so I can be my boyfriend's plus one? Oh what a bridezilla coz you're not uprooting your entire wedding for meeeeeeeeeeeee.
Also THEY DONT EVEN HAVE THE DOG YET. Why can’t the just get the dog after the wedding?
For story 5, I have 0 sympathy for the husband. I have a hard time feeling bad for a full-grown able bodied man who is allowing his family to go into debt and suffer rather than taking responsibility for himself. I am not surprised the sister has such disdain towards him.
Exactly this!!! Especially if you're knocking up your 26 year old partner while your 35 fully being supported off her working because you lost your job 2 years ago ☠️
@@jazzenriquez9827What!? TWO years ago!? I thought it was a recent job loss. Wow that guy is a massive pos. I saw what the update comments were saying, but this made him seem worse.
@@vania.v7350 also they got together when she was only 21 , just got flashbacks from when I dated a guy 10 years older than me then.
A FEW cups of water is crazy for a closed terrarium.
You have to have the street smarts of a sheltered house cat to think that's helpful.
Hey man, don’t insult sheltered house cats like that 😆
Note: my two sheltered indoor cats have NEVER over-watered a terrarium! I don't have one, but the fact still stands 😂
Not to mention OP never asked him to touch it. WTF is wrong with him.
That straight up weaponized incompetence. What a asshole husband
@blaa6 it to me shows intentions on his behalf
Story 4 is classic "accusation is a confession" HE'S trying to destroy the relationship
Story 3: not a single word about emotional cheating. If he still has romantic feelings for her that’s cheating in my eyes. He’s so fckn bold to ask to have a friendship with his mistress. The wife was disrespected for two whole years and was graceful enough to try to save her marriage just for that guy to ask if he can still be friends with the mistress. Am I missing something? This is lunacy!
Regarding last story; seasoned mom chiming in, abusing your spouse while pregnant is not okay. Yes, hormones are crazy during pregnancy and I have on more than one occasion lashed out at my partner for something I didn’t like the way he did. After I felt horrible and apologized for it, then worked on ways to recognize those hormone triggers and learned to control them. I hope OP and spouse can learn how to communicate better during this time or pregnant wife will have some couples therapy to deal with after the baby.
Hormones can do crazy things but it's not like they stay as a steady stream. One minute you're crying at a pet store commercial and the next your mad cause all the ice cream sandwiches are gone. That is normal hormonal flux. (Yes both examples were from real life)
Being tired and grumpy sure that's normal, so long as she can see it later as being rude/grumpy and apologizes. There is a world of difference between "I'm sorry I snapped earlier I didn't mean to." VS "Sorry hormones you know"
I haven't been pregnant but I have bipolar disorder and I try daily to control my emotions and its hard its okay to not be prefect but effort is required and she seems to be putting in 0 effort. the wife needs to work on stepping away instead of yelling. yelling has no healthy place in a marriage
Update on the pregnant wife and jobless husband story (story 5)! Wife has left him, he is now on legal advice reddit asking if he can force his (soon to be ex-)wife to allow him visitation to the unborn fetus and force his (soon to be ex-)wife to allow him in the delivery room. Absolutely wild.
thank you for sharing the update!
It sounds like he got her pregnant on purpose...maybe he sabotaged her birth control
😮 wowsers
Yeah… I saw through his bullshit. He came off as hiding something pretty big. Like he doesn’t seem like a good person
Not surprised. After hearing about his fragile ego, it made sense why he was unemployed. Perhaps most jobs are "good enough" for him, and he seems he can't swallow his pride to work for other people.
Rule of thumb for wedding guest list: if you haven't seen or heard of a person for a year or more, they will not be invited. Applied also for family members. I didn't even post my engagement, just a photo after the wedding, Who needed to know, knew.
Family therapist here - I would start individual sessions with her and work on self esteem and processing his lost love for her and what she wants for her life and what she wants to show her kids. I would completely pause couples therapy. And I would likely state something about how I don't work on reconciling relationships when one person isn't willing to reconcile (which would involve cutting contact with the affair partner).
“I will borrow you forgiveness” is my new favorite saying
I'll lend you a dictionary. And that was. me, really I was just poking fun. But it's lending
The terrarium one: All I can say is, that husband is lucky he didn't become plant food. It takes a certain kind of sickness to ruin something so important to a loved one and then try and make them out to be the villain when you're the one that victimized them
Morgan is right about the abusive couples shouldn’t be going to therapy, I read the same in the book “why does he do that”. It said that narcissists or abusive people tend to be very smart and tricking everyone and if therapist will side with the abuser it will totally crush the victim and they will not seek help for a long time after that.
In the 2nd story, the thought of not being respected because he is more feminine didn't come from his brother's mind, it came from his boyfriend's and his own insecurity. Basically, his brother's boyfriend invested too much energy into something that wasn't his concern; there were thousands of things, he chose the wrong one, and then became frustrated with the time he wasted on something he shouldn't have even researched. And since he's probably young, he may not know how to deal with frustration and ended up blaming the wrong person... As for the brother, he seems to be a very permissive person, with little personal opinion and quite easy to manipulate. He's probably the first person he truly loves. In the end, she's not the asshole, she's just dealing with immaturity and lack of communication from others.
im a gay dude, if my boyfriend said that to my sister it would be curtains on that relationship unless he literally groveled and begged for forgiveness. and even then i'd probably still end it after such a heartless comment.
@@crunchevo8974 I agree, but I also know from my own experiences and those of people around me that when people are extremely people pleasers, whether because they grew up always with others telling them what to think or be, they are extremely easy to manipulate, which is quite dangerous. And when low self-esteem is added, which is often associated, people think they don't deserve more or better 😕. I'm also in a same-sex relationship, and from the moment I noticed that my girlfriend was spending her time sending wedding dresses to my sister, I would already tell her to stop. There are things that no one else should decide but the bride. I don't know what really went through his head to think it was his place to make that decision. Maybe he wanted to be her stylist and tell his friends, "Look, I was the one who dressed her." 😅
to laurens point at 14:10 i think its important to notice the difference between narcissistic and narcissist. i prefer using the former as a description of behavior before ever labelling someones character
exactly. we all have some narcissistic characteristics from time to time it’s just important to acknowledge them and work on them. narcissist would neverrr
Yes thiss. Every single person has been narcissistic from time to time but to call someone a narcissist means that they have NPD. If someone isn’t diagnosed you can’t label them as a narcissist but you can definitely call someone narcissistic
@@dqndicore yes yes that part is important that i missed. it's 'diagnosing' a behavioral disorder vs diagnosing boundary crossing lol
Story 6: I’m currently pregnant, coming into my second trimester. I have had a couple outbursts at my partner myself and I IMMEDIATELY apologize because I realize he does NOT deserve to be treated that way. He is very understanding it’s the hormones and it’s nobodies fault however I always let him know “I’m so sorry, it’s no excuse but it really is the hormones and I am so sorry.” He still is allowed his time to step away because he shouldn’t have to sit there and deal with me being grumpy or upset and let it out on him. I also have the issue of certain smells being to much but I don’t say “THATS DISGUSTING” I simply have asked him to not eat those things around me becuase they’re just too much. You don’t need to be mean about it. Baby mama in story number 6 can be a lot nicer, it doesn’t sound like she is trying.
The terrarium story- if I knew how important that was to my spouse, I would know about it. At the very least, I would google how to manage it. Further, I would consider such a plant a valued part of the house and would have my own appreciation for it.
I audibly cheer when Lauren is here to co host I love her sm
Okay....I don't normally comment on these BUT story 4 just upsets me. As a person who cries when I kill my OWN plants by accident, I would be so upset! My husband doesn't touch my plants because he knows how much they mean to me and that I know what they need. He will mention when one looks not healthy or if he realizes that I haven't watered them for a while, BUT he doesn't touch them. I have a plant that his grandma gave me and I have a cactus from my parents. I just look at my plants as well, even have our cat in the habit of wanting to be picked up to sniff them. That story upsets me as a plant mom...
Yes, there was something weird there, my husband is exacly like that too, he will not touch them, but we will ask if everything ok with some if he thinks it looks weird... I remember when I was going to be fine for two weeks and I told him he had to water plan in study he was like "why??? If you water them before leaving they will be ok" 😂 I said he is right but everyone expect this one, this one you have to water a lot more in summer... He totally dosen't understand why even people want to have plants etc like ot isn't something that he feels need for or care, but when I say "oh I need to go buy new soil" we only ask when. It is simple like that he may don't care but I care and he wants me to be happy. we actually have to much plants but everytime a see something wow and I look at him he know it is going home with US and dosen't say anythinig. When I lost my beautiful flower center of table, he asked if I want new one bc I was so sad...
There is something wrong in this story, he did it for reason...
1st story: Courtney does NOT want to go to the wedding. She wants a free trip to Italy hence why she doesnt want to bring the dog because it would restrict what SHE wants to do
pretty sure they live in italy
@hondacrv6959 Oh. My bad. BUT she still wants the free trip!
If that was true though she would find a way to have someone watch the dog. She's refusing to do that part.
I don`t think so. They probably live in a neighboring country. If I had a car I`d be in italy in 4 hours easy. I`m austrian. They don`t say getting married in italy if it`s their country. But 4 hours road trip, definitely in the neighborhood maybe even living here. so not the big deal Americans make it out to be.@@hondacrv6959
They don't live in Italy. It was an all expense paid trip. That's what a destination wedding is; not where you live.
Courtney is clearly jealous that she isn't the one getting married and is using the dog as a scapegoat.
That's my exact thought. It's not Courtney's wedding therefore it's not important
There was an update to the story where the best man's whole family was shocked and turned on him for encouraging what Courtney did. Best man is also starting to question the relationship. She tried backtracking and begging they invite him back but the groom said no and everyone's praying ex best man will learn a good lesson about Courtney and the kind of effect she has on his life.
@@availanila youre the G.O.A.T
@availanila THANK YOU FOR THIS UPDATE I WAS LOSING SLEEP OVER THIS
oh yeah now I remember thanks for the update. Didn`t he say he wantst o be the best man after all and they said sorry we picked someone else now can`t risk you changing your mind again?@@availanila
As a plant lover, when Morgan said "a few CUPS of water", I let out the biggest gasp.
Me too
Yep he definitely did it to crush her, all those precious memories it holds too?! a simple text or google would’ve clarified any doubts. If he’d have just left it alone & done nothing, they could’ve gone on their trip no prob. Sounds like she’s told him all this info, so either he didn’t care enough to listen/remember or he knew how important it was to her and did it maliciously. Either way, bad. Take the job and run girl!
I kill plants. It's not intentional- I'm just never able to keep them alive. I have a lucky bamboo that I've managed to keep alive for over a year, but I've brought in several other plants annnnd they're pretty much dead, despite all my best efforts. I don't bring new plants into the house anymore.
My point is that I, a serial plant killer, would still know not to freaking pour cup after cup of water into a terrarium. What in the hell.
The terrarium story: its giving im unhappy your looking at moving across country so im going to damage something of yours to show how unhappy i am and then blame it on you so we dont move and i dont have to be honest about my feelings.
Oh for sure, it's petty as hell.
First Story: Courtney is unbelievable. Like I get it, you want to go to the Wedding with your partner but its not about you. Your partner is the best man in the wedding. Why would you give him an ultimatum on something like this. My fiancé got to go to a wedding in Australia and I couldn't go. Was I sad? Yes! But I didn't threaten him to stay behind or I'll leave him.
She doesn't even want to go to the wedding. She wants to go to Italy for free
She wants everything to be about her, she's totally jealous her boyfriend is best man and she's not part of the bridal party. TBF she seems like the type to wear white so op is better off.
Also my brother told me the day after he got married he had a registered ceremony because it was my sis in law's nans wish before she died. Not to attend. Just they be married before my nephew was born. So they had 2 witnesses, and I was like ok. It would have been nice to go but I can also see why he did it. I wasn't like how dare you. I'll never speak to you again.
Right?! I haven’t been able to go to so many things with my man before! It sucks of course but I would never even begin to think of making someone feel bad about ME. You can feel bad but don’t get mad. And it’s a wedding with only 4 people invited!!! How selfish to make it about you?! Like Lauren said I’m curious to see Courtney’s side.
as someone whose first language isn´t english i never know when y'all say things wrong or catch grammar errors, sometimes y'all even pronounce words like me and to be honest y'all have expanded my vocabulary even further so i never get why people get upset, thanks for your hard work!!
There are a lot of people here in the U.S. that can be a*sholes. They feel more important if they correct the grammar of another person.
Small thing about your comment: your apostrophe is in the wrong place in y'all!
Y'all is short for "you all" so the apostrophe goes after the Y instead of the A!
The terrarium story- no wayyyyy this was done to be “helpful” he said wanted it gone and took this opportunity while she was gone and couldn’t fix it immediately this is bsssssssss
I think the affair he got dumped by the affair because maybe she thought they were going to get divorced and he never did
And probably she said he has to come clean and work on his marriage if he won’t get divorced
That’s why he’s insisting so much, because he is still in love with her, but she is disappointed and doesn’t care about him another but wants him to do “the right thing”
Story 2: OP needs to pull the uno reverse and tell her brother that a man, effeminate or no, assuming he has the authority to tell her what to wear on her wedding day is actually deeply misogynistic. His boyfriend was so disrespectful and showed his own prejudice. He doesn't respect her, full stop. If he's trying to be a fashion critic he needs to use design & industry language, not cheap shots at her weight and taste.
For story 5. I also suffered from Hyperemesis Gravidarum. Even if you plan a pregnancy you will not know if you’ll have HG until it happens. I had a surprise pregnancy and got hg, and my kidneys started to fail, I was bed bound for 22 weeks. I lost 50lbs. It’s incredibly dangerous pregnancy. Stress makes it worse as well so having her sister be able to alleviate that stress by providing for her is so helpful. By him trying to give it back will only increase stress and increase risk for the pregnancy.
Story 4- I’d be livid, I have a t-shirt and box from my brother after he passed and if anyone destroyed or ruined it I’d be devastated.
For stories one and two (only ones I’ve seen so far) I think this is the narrative (that personally I find very toxic) that you pick your partners side over everything. Really the narrative should be in every situation decide what YOU think is right and communicate that in a respectful and kind way to everyone involved. Sometimes my partner and I disagree and we consider it part of our jobs to say ‘I see where that other person is coming from on this’ and we are in a healthy respectful relationship so no one gets mad when that happens.
Narcissist is not at all an “open ended” term, it’s a clinical diagnosis with specific criteria that you need to meet in order to be diagnosed. I hate the way social media has turned clinical terms into catchy little insults to throw around.
Absolutely. It’s creating such a harmful effect on people who actually have the disorder.
The first story… the girlfriend sounds abusive. The groom needs to check on his best man & see if he needs help.
Okay and the second story… the boyfriend sounds like he’s trying to cause issues so he can eventually isolate the brother. Or he’s insane or both.
Everyone needs help
Totally agree, I feel like people unfamiliar with abuse don't keep such a keen eye on the little signs, and these people are planting not-so-little red flags left and right.
Omg the terrarium story!! I built one in middle school that lived untouched for 6months with a fish and plants too!! My dream is to build a big one with a ceiling skylight through the top of it when I get a house one day :)
Last story: currently pregnant with my second baby. Pregnancy and post partum rage are real and need to be addressed in therapy. I never experienced those issues, but OP is right there’s no excuse for the abuse. His wife is not self regulating during hormonal episodes, and worse is that she doesn’t seem to think it’s important. With my first pregnancy I was SO PARANOID about my husband. He made new guy friends and I somehow convinced myself that he wasn’t interested in me or the baby anymore. It was so real to me. Fortunately my therapist noticed and helped me figure out how to recognize the paranoia and combat it myself. So long story short I felt remorse that my husband felt on the defensive all the time, and I worked to fix it. This pregnancy I’ve stayed ahead of the paranoid mood swings. I can’t understand how OP’s wife has no interest in being better, but I hope they figure it out together.
Yup I was emotional when I was pregnant when I was being too much, I apologize to my husband and took a nap. I did yell at him a few time about him washing his latch containers, are certain foods, but I leaned to control myself. Because it’s not fair to him but he did start washing his dishes, and foods I didn’t like when he cooked them he cooked outside. We have a camping stove so he would cook outside. I would apologize for being too much, but he said it’s OK. But abuse is never ok Pregnant or not, if that’s the case, people with. PTSD have a lifetime excuse. If they happen to be abusive.
Princess and the pea ‘caused such a fuc@kin issue’ 😂😂😂😂 never heard a whole story condensed into one line before hahaha
Last story: I want to provide insight as someone who went to family therapy and had that used by my dad to further the abuse on me. The therapists don't know. If the abuser is smart enough to do it like that, the therapist does not know. Because a teenager reacting to abuse looks a lot like mood swings when the abuse isn't visible. An adult reacting to a partner's abuse looks a lot like they're the problem when the abuse isn't visible. Someone who's abused is likely to hide the abuse even more than the abuser. It feels embarrassing, humiliating. And I hid way too much abuse done by my parents and then some of the partners I've had as an adult.
14:36 fun fact - there 6 types of narcissists. It really helped my understanding of my mom.
Hey guys! I love your show and the 5 of you. I'm a therapist, and it's pretty standard that there is usually NO couples therapy in relationships where DV is present. The couple would likely be pushed towards individual therapy. This is for everyone's safety. I've worked for lots of organizations and this has always been the policy. Just thought I would let you guys know.
I just NEED morgan to invite Reesa Tessa to an episode of THT called "who tf did I marry". I am obsessed with that womaaaan.
Serrrriously
Craziness
yesssss
I love how Morgan always says these sayings with such confidence and seriousness. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. But it's always funny to me how serious she is about them 😂
Morgan I know you mentioned going on Say Yes to the Dress 37:28 but I think you should look up the legal battle between Hayley Paige and JLM Couture (Kleinfeld, where the show is recorded). I'm not trying to tell you what to do, just provide information. They are filing for bankruptcy due to their actions. Imo I believe you would want to know before going.
Story 3- he should just leave, he still loves her .. he doesn’t want to be FRIENDS with her. He still wants her .. from someone who came from “kids are older divorced parents” just do it now.
Story 2: after that white whale comment I wouldn’t have replied and that would honestly be the last time I would ever talk to my brothers boyfriend. He would’ve been left on read and blocked.. and un-invited to the wedding. I don’t understand why people entertain that behavior. A person like that deserves nothing but silence.
Story 2: I had multiple people say I looked "fatter" in my wedding photos than I did at the time I shared photos, and a "friend" thought I was pregnant in my wedding photo that I had as a profile pic. Needless to say I couldn't even look at my wedding photos for a very long time, because I was very insecure about my body. Which is a shame because I made my wedding dress, which was always a dream of mine, and now I thought I messed up lol. It sucks we let people drag us down when they are obviously miserable themselves or jealous, but words can have a big impact. I hope OP's brother sees the light and makes the right choices concerning his sister. NTA
for anyone considering going to the tht shows it’s so worth it!! my sister and i went and it was one of our favorite outings morgan, lauren, and justin were incredible i would 100% go to another show and recommend others go !! :)
I WANNA GO SO BADDDDD but I can’t :(
@@Imjustkendallhopefully on the next tour 😭🙏
I love that Morgan is such an advocate for therapy- I am too, couple, family, solo- no matter what therapy is good for everyone.
Posted just in time for me to buckle down and do a work project! Literally my favorite people to listen to
There's definitely been Say Yes to the Dress episodes where the groom was at the appointment. They always have the dramatic stop, and the cameras go to the consultant's face being like, "Are you sure??" And then Laurie in a solo scene talking about why its a bad idea
For story 5, the pregnant wife left him and now he's asking if he can have visitation rights to the child while it's still in the womb and if he can force her to let him be in the delivery room
that's insane. and no and no. also she'll probably get full custody and he'll possibly get visitation rights with supervision IF the wife is generous. but like damn that's gross.
Story 1: I just realized why my dog has separation anxiety because of this podcast! I never thought about it but when my dog was a puppy was when everything shut down during Covid and I was doing school from home so he was never separated from me 🥲
Kourtney reminds me of the fights my sister and I used to have when we were 7/10
"If we ever get a mansion I get to have the biggest room"
"No why do you get to have the biggest room??? MOM!!!!!!!"
Right? I remember a friend in school that would ask weird hypothetical questions, I think we were more like 13 but still pretty young, and she'd get upset if people didn't answer how she wanted.
Some of those questions were actually kinda creepy, one in particular really sticks out where she'd asked me if she died tomorrow would I go to her funeral? When I said yes but that's a weird thing to ask she got upset that I "called her weird". I learnt after a while there's no pleasing someone like that, they are actively looking to be upset by something & cause drama. I get the feeling Courtney is similar, that there will always be some drama or another going on in her life.
i understand lauren saying that people could hold 'favours' against one SO MUCH. my mom is a narcissist and she has always been about her image to others but i was treated like absolute shit since my parents separated. i had a stroke a couple years back (at 22) and she took care of me and i'm thankful for that but BOY she has used that against me SO much and will do forever. i hate that and i hate that any kind of kindness from anyone scares me.
I'm so sorry for what you've gone through, my story is almost identical to yours. I had a TIA at 26yrs old & my narc (now ex) husband looked after me but always held it against me. My mother is exactly the same & I can't escape it cos I gotta live with her, after my divorce, I became homeless due to never being able to afford my own home (I'm a millennial) & I do my best to avoid her but she always gives me backhanded compliments, followed with threats of throwing me out. Unfortunately, my father receives the same abuse from her. She does have terminal cancer & whilst I don't wish her harm, I can't wait for the day I'm free of her narcissistic wrath😮💨
@@emilyemily444 i also live with my mom because renting is hard in my country too and we dont talk... it's been 2 years... it's hell. i'm so sorry too. i wish you the best.
She could choose to buy a dog when she wants… a wedding is much more important lol
?
@@hayamirin6795Courtney is buying a puppy from a breeder so she can get a dog at anytime she wants
@@hayamirin6795for story one, they hadn’t even gotten the dog yet
Adopt don’t shop
@@aishugoel8142 no
Am I the only one who finds Morgan & Lauren’s grammar/saying mix ups, accents and math butchering adorable and endearing 💕☺️ Haters gonna hate!
This episode of THT is literally going to get me through the day!
The last story makes me so sad. You can definitely be understanding with a pregnant spouse, but if there's yelling and insults every day along with no remorse/real apologies afterwards, I hope I would have the strength to leave that situation.
as someone who was cheated on in my previous relationship, leaving him was the best decision i made. i was able to heal and find happiness and then met the girl i plan to marry
Also, how Morgan pronounces “bag.” Minnesota comes out strong! 😅 Love it!
For the terrarium story - I would legitimately be considering something extreme. Whenever I leave on a trip I leave extremely detailed written instructions on how to care for my plants, aquariums, and cat, even though my partner has lived with me for years and knows how to care for them perfectly. But I still do it out of extreme caution. If I came home from a trip and something I loved in that way was moved/touched/ruined I would be upset. A sincere apology would usually suffice. But the lack of apology and ACCUSATION of frivolity ….. I would consider never speaking to them ever again.
Story #4 reminds me of a TikTok I saw where this lady had to go away for a week and asked her husband to take care of her prized hydrangeas. He didn't water them for TEN DAYS and she came back to them wilted and dying. Her hydrangeas were the focus of her TikTok account and she put so much effort and care into them only for her husband to kill them seemingly the first chance he got.
I just lost my dog on Tuesday, birthday was yesterday(crappiest 24th birthday ever) this is the comfort I needed ❤️
I’m sorry for your loss 😔🤍
@@maloumasereel966 thank you❤️🤍
Condolences. 💔
Hugs ❤
Wishing you comfort during such a hard time ❤️
Justin: "I take back about hearing him out."
Absolutely the correct answer
whenever she says “and sayings” it comes out like “insanes”. so funny, love you morgan
I love how Justin always helps the girls out with breaking down the male psyche lol
Tried to see this isn’t duplicated.
Update Story 3:
“She is this desperate. She is a repeat poster. He wanted a divorce and was leaving and she threatened to keep his kids from him or make coparenting hell so he stayed. She stopped adding it into her new posts because it got so much backlash.
She makes a new post weekly and ignores all advice. I have no fucking clue why she posts other than for attention.
She uses throw aways. Sometimes she'll use the same throw away more than once, but she eventually deletes them and the posts and makes a new one.
Maybe I should start saving them and archive them but I don't want to get that invested in her crazy.”
If they don’t love you for your borrow they don’t deserve you for your lend ❤❤
14:42 Such a good point! Words become so overused that the meaning of those words slowly diminish, especially mental illnesses. Narcissism is a personality disorder, but people throw the word around so quickly
I like that Lauren has continued injecting colour in her wardrobe. Love the jumper! ❤
I've heard the Terrarium story before; one commenter posited that he's jealous about her career so he wanted to hurt her where it mattered.
Speaking from my own experience. As someone who just recently went through pregnancy, I can say it’s definitely like Rebecca from This Is Us. You have times where you lash out and can’t control your emotions at the time but once everything settles, you can see where you are wrong. You aren’t 100% a completely different person where you once were able to apologize and acknowledge when you are wrong and now you can’t. It’s definitely something they need to work on in therapy because postpartum is essentially the 4th trimester and postpartum rage, anxiety and depression are a thing.
Story 3- her husband clearly doesn’t want her. She needs to divorce him and start healing on her own.
Story 6: I feel like you guys were so light-hearted on this story and it deserved more concern. An adult woman, qnd in general person, should not completely let their hormones control them. She is actively hurting her husband and I think this story wasnt treated as serious. This is just how I felt, I love you guys but that just felt weird.
Her, wife, OO is a women, in comments later she said she was pregnant before and this didn't happen to her and she had hormonal changes but not that extreme, and she dosen't know what to do anymore bc as women she wants to support but as partner she feel abused...
But I agree with you, I'm actually very mean person when my hormons take over my body (read: every month) But I know it like I know I'm very mean innthis time do I remove myself from situations that can trigger some tsunami of words, but I'm too late to bite my tounge, I say i'm sorry bc people don't deserve it and O know it and I say please leave me alone for a while, when I feel like the wave is gone we can talk, etc.
It is scary actually bc sometimes I say things faster then I can think, but also bc I don't see at first it, when it startseit stards with little things and I don't see them, only after few of them I get that it started ( it is more like silent treatment, death' stare, b* face, easly irritated, the little things,
Unless I read a very different version of "The Princess and the Pea" growing up, that is NOT how the story goes 😂
The terrarium guy MAKES ME SO INFURIATED. He definitely threw a little boy fit because she "abandoned" him. Some men are like this. He purposely ruined something beautiful to her. He was mad that she got a big job offer, was traveling for an extended time, and had special things, so he ruined it on purpose. And in a way that could be played off as doing "something nice". I am so happy she canceled the plans. Divorce him
story 3 - do NOT EVER stay together "for the kids" then divorce when they're grown, that is SO MUCH SIGNIFICANTLY WORSE for your children!! the younger the child, the better they can comprehend and cope, if ur unhappy with ur marriage, staying together "for the kids" actually makes adulthood transition significantly harder and can make affected adult children feel completely displaced and like they're losing their childhood. negative impacts of divorce typically go away within 3 years after the fact with most children - the actual divorce event may be difficult, espcially if parents choose to put their children in the middle and try to pull info out of them or shittalk the other parent - but what occurs after will not be as negative as some of yall are convinced it will be.
I absolutely love orchids. I have desperately tried 3 times to keep orchids alive. I watched endless hours of videos on tips, best practices, etc., i bought the right tools, pots, potting medium, fertilizer, and everything! I always made sure to steralize everything before trimming or repotting, but they still all died on me. I was devistated every single time and decided to give up trying.
Language is fluid. It's always changing. I'm Texan and the way I speak and the words I speak are valid and correct for the area that I live. 😊
7 seconds!! Agghhh the earliest I’ve ever been!!!
Same!!!!
Lmao that's not what the princess and the pea is about 😂
2nd story hit close for me because I always envisioned my brother walking me down the aisle when I got married since our dad passed, but now we aren’t even speaking because of a manipulative girlfriend that came between us
For doing destination weddings you can reach out to those most important and check if they are willing/able to come before diving into planning. That's what my partner and I have done, we started talking about doing a cruise wedding recently but before any planning we've each checked in with parents, siblings and out best friends, the people we couldn't imagine our day without, to make sure they were onboard. Of course we plan to invite other friends and family but it will be okay if they aren't there so long as the others are.
Just have to say, stumbling upon this video this morning and absolutely love the princess and the pea reference. Just so happens to be a time where my children's school is putting on a play about the princess and the pea.!! ❤
The article mentioned in the last story reminded me of how Jonah Hill would use so much therapy jargon on his girlfriend. Man was manipulative AF, in the name of "therapy".
He wasn't he clearly stated what his boundaries were and gave her an out...
The issue was boundaries are things under your own control. He gave her a list of things he didn't want her to do. Not the same thing.
@rosewein I don't agree...he told her I don't like this, this and this if you don't agree then cool we are not going to workout. He set the boundary and told her I understand if you can't understand but then we won't work out
It is semantics I guess. But really he could of just said I don't think we are going to work out. If she had asked why I could see the reason for that list, she either changed (which is control) or she wasn't good enough for him which is kinda abusive language. It's a stubtle but I think Important difference.
@rosewein you're funny! Semantics, ha! So if I'm understanding correctly because he did what most women ask of men which is be "clear with me" (aka talk to me) instead of playing games it's somehow controlling? And somehow you also assume he was in some way telling her she wasn't good enough? Lmao delulu is strong with you.
He just told her I'm not comfortable with any of this if you can understand great I appreciate it and we can continue otherwise I think it's best we go our separate ways. I don't want to argue in my relationship because this will be on ongoing issue. That is a healthy relationship one where you can express how you feel and also understand that if you cannot see eye to eye or compromise it's best to go your own way and find someone you match better with. He did she can too.
Who is to say, neither of us know, whether she also expressed her own boundaries in their relationship.
Lets keep Morgan as the reader / narrator please; she's the best and easiest to follow along with
Story one: as someone who has not attended a wedding of BIL for my dog.... the girlfriend is the a hole. My dog was DYING (passed away two weeks post wedding) my husband still went for the weekend, I felt awful not being able to attend so was sure to send a note along with their gift with my husband. Everyone understood completely and I knew I made the right choice for my pack (also had another VERY, 15 yrs senior dog I am blessed to still have)
We were sure that we gave them MONTHS in advance notice, and my husband (his brother) still attended.
Also on another note that same brother and his previous wife DID basically this but over the bridesmaid dress. 2 days before our wedding his brother and now ex wife let us know they would not be attending our wedding because she didn't like the dress..... or me. We had been together for 6 years and she would get mad I was always considered family "even though we weren't married" (they were together 5 yrs from dating to divorce 🫠)
just in time to get me through a science project!!!! love you guys so much and i will now use “i will borrow you forgiveness” until the end of time
Added context on the last story - OP is a woman and she said she's also been pregnant before & knows what the hormones are like
I honestly don't understand when people bring up certain mistakes. But what is the point. If I hear it I just make a comment to myself in my car when I'm alone and move on with my day.😂
Exactly 😂 except when someone wrongly corrects someone else, then I need to defend the other person 😂
Listened on Spotify as I was getting ready for the gym and now I’m rewatching on TH-cam as I eat my post workout meal lol I love this show and y’all 🩵
Justin was sassy today! Love it ❤
If someone would try to take away you being the best man for your best friend, i mean come ON. The reason shes doing this, isnt just over the dog for a two day trip, that sounds insane. Shes doing EVERYTHING in her power to stop this and thats sick. Her control here is sick