Our Unplanned Pregnancy, Arguments, Regrets & Lessons from 20 Years Together
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ม.ค. 2025
- On this episode of New World Old Soul, Melissa and Jeremy celebrate Valentine's Day by taking a look back at their time spent together over the last 20 years and discuss the important lessons learned along the way.
The couple asks for viewer/listener advice when it comes to what makes for a successful marriage. There is also talk about the good, bad, and ugly moments of their relationship/marriage; their compromises, their arguments, even their unfortunate wedding mishaps.
You guys handled this subject perfectly, THANKS!! I'm now 81 and married 52 years to the same wonderful wife. As a widower now I can say my best memories are with my wife and kids. As you said, life isn't perfect, our marriage was not perfect BUT divorce was NEVER considered or on the table as options!! With my wife now gone, I feel like a bird without one wing!!
Props to you! Awesome that you had 52 years with your bride
❤️ I'm so sorry for your loss
Your tree could evolve to a shamrock tree. Then an Easter bunny tree. Do patriotic for Memorial, Labor, etc. Fall leaves, then Halloween, Thanksgiving pilgrims. Tada. Back to Christmas!
@@NewWorldOldSoulPodcast exactly!!!
We just celebrated 50 years together. I was married at the age of 16 to an alcoholic and abuser for almost 3 years. I had the strength to finally get out. The day my divorce became final I met my hubby. He kissed me that night and I told him "give me 3 months and we'll be married" 3 months later turned into 50 years and still on our honeymoon. We're both retired and are also together 24/7. Our secret .... never go to bed mad and communication. in 50 years we've had only 3 fights. How is that possible .... communication. if something is bothering us, we go to the other person and say "we need to talk". We never let that "hill" turn into a "mountain".
We’ve been married for 42 years. My advice is before you get married, make sure your covenant does not contain an “ if”. Marriage should be two becoming one. Commitment to one another is the security you need with the guidance of the Lord.
It's been 40 years for us. I agree wholeheartedly with you!
I have been divorced for 38 years. I raised my three sons alone and have no regrets. I never wanted to remarry while raising them. I saw to many failures with the your kids, my kids issue. Now most men I meet are swallow and that does not interest me.
I love you and your sweet family. I just wanted to ask what Nevaeh thinks about the fact that you had her before you were married.
Amen 🙏
Well said. That is exactly what we say. 36 Years march 4
Our first real yelling fight was over laundry. We didn't have a washer and dryer so I had to go to the laundromat. I asked my husband to follow me and help me unload and then come back and help load it when it was done. He told me he wasn't going to help me. I was so mad that I dumped all the laundry on the living room floor and left. I spent the night with my sister and when I came home he had done all the laundry and then took me Sears and bought me a washer and dryer.
Our wedding was at the justice of the peace. We spent about $100 on our outfits. We will be celebrating 25 year anniversary will be in July.
Agree with everything you've said! In May we celebrate 46 years. Fish together, garden together, spend evenings on back patio watching grandkids play together, and serve in church together! We are sooo blessed!! And don't critique each other in front of people! 😢
❤❤❤❤
And hopefully were on the same side when Covid restrictions and narrativ hit 😉
We were!❤
I met my wife, Claire, on the 26th May 2000 on a blind date that neither of us wanted to be on. A year and a day later I asked her to marry me on bended knee at the side of the road overlooking her home town. We got married on the 28th September the following year at a cost of just over £1000, and the dress cost 2500p, £25 but pennies sounds much more. We have been happily married for almost 22 years. A word of advice though, especially to guys. Always, and I mean always, pick dates that you can remember. We met on the 26th, engaged on the 27th and married the 28th. I never forget the dates. It has saved me no end of trauma forgetting and the associated consequences.
Been married 50 years, raised 2 children ( and many other that we claim that lived in our home for a time), have 4 grandchildren ( and others we claim), have 1 great grandchild. Our advice is talk, laugh, love, pray and talk some more. When anger raises its ugly head, talk even if you really don’t want to. You and your family are awesome, keep doing what your doing.
It was interesting listening to the two of you talking about marriage. We have had friends who spent a small fortune on their wedding only to divorce after just a few years. My wife and I married 53 years ago, we had very little money and our family were not in a position to help. But we managed to buy our first home, furnished it with secondhand furniture, but only after I sold my car to raise the capital. We raised two sons and are now blessed with four grandchildren. We have been through very difficult times, but survived and are still best friends.❤
Amazing ❤️
Love the comments from everyone, love this community. You guys are so lucky to have a happy marriage and wonderful family. We are married now 57 years, like everyone there have been sad days. We have learned how to communicate our feelings, always sleep together, support each other thru sickness. Looking forward to our 60th anniversary. I married my best friend we are in it forever.
As a first time grandma at 53, it is anything but terrifying. Imagine the deep love you have for your children and triple it! It is seriously the best ever
Wow, the love for grandkids is greater than that for your kids?? I cannot even imagine that! ❤
I tell everyone, the only reason to have kids is to have grandkids 😂 of course my kids are like " ok mom" seriously though grandkids are the best thing ever!!!!
So fun listening to you two!!! We were engaged for 18 mos, and then found out we were expecting...planned our wedding in 3 weeks, small family gathering/wedding in a chapel and an open house style reception. Then we stayed with family and opened all of our gifts with them. We went back to our apt and crashed. By our tenth anniversary we had a 9 yr old, 8 yr old and 2 yr old and bought our first and only house. God blessed us! And we are so thankful! We will hit 35 years in 2024. Healthy thing for a marriage, go to church together, hug every day, kiss every night before sleep.
It's like "Hallmark movie" goals for the real world. Aka the homesteaders! ;) Love, respect, compromise, goal setting, friendship and more importantly both people are ever evolving. Love it guys!
This March 12th will celebrate our 36 year anniversary. My husband use to say Hallmark is the one that created these holidays. I thought he was just trying to get out of getting me a card. I agree with him now. To me I appreciate sweet things my husband will do randomly. Four adult kids later; one granddaughter and one grandson on the way; we couldn’t be happier especially after escaping Oregon in 2020 and buying our little homestead here in Sandpoint. You’re never to old for a new adventure and my husband and I have never been closer.❤
This March 17th. Hubby n I will celebrate 23 years of marriage w 29 years together... we can not go to sleep mad at each other... and in difficult times, we only seek out advice from our pastor or a Godly couple with the same mind as us... our disagreements will only take place in private....and 2 wrongs don't make a right...and in our marriage it's not 50/50 it's 100/100! And we agreed that we could disagree and that's OK too! Happy Valentine's Day!
My husband passed unexpectedly from silicosis after 37 years. The simple camping trips, beach trips, hiking and watching sunsets fill my memories without regrets. We had our wedding near a local waterfall, dressed in white Cotten.
Don’t take yourselves too seriously….
Hearing you both talk about relationships is looking back at my life. My husband past 23 years ago and when asked why I never remarried, how can I do that in my mind I’m still married how could I betray my husband by a different person. 32 years of marriage I felt whole. Figuring out me has been a venture i still make decisions based on us not me. Stay blessed and happy always
My husband passed 7 1/2 years ago after being together for 30 years. I feel the same way you do. I can't imagine my life with someone else.
So true on wedding expenses. Love the wedding cake story! Look at the memories! You are really amazing and your accomplishments are truly incredible! I’m so happy for you both..you’ve nailed it and are so young!!Such a great outlook on life!Thank you for sharing.
Mrs. Richards here...My husband and I will be celebrating 21 years in July. We are definitely best friends. Always have each others back (No matter what)...Laugh everyday...Communicate (talk about Anything and Everything)... And most important, WE ALWAYS TELL EACH OTHER, I YOU LOVE BEFORE WALKING OUT THE DOOR OR GETTING OFF THE PHONE because you never know if that's the last time you'll talk to them. ❤
Treat each other with respect. Sometimes couples treat strangers with more respect than they do each other.
I was very young when we got married, 19 and my husband was, going on 26. This past October we celebrated 35 years and together 40. One thing that I recommend is do not go to bed mad. Life is too short and if something was to happen, that's is something you will have to live with the rest of your life. Also, hurtful words you may use. I have always said, a bruise will go away, a broken heart is hard to mend. Yes, there will always be struggles, life isn't always fair but communication is very important. GOD bless you both!!
If marriage is a model of Christ and the church then the way we treat and care for one another should be a ministry mission marriage. Ministering to one another, encouraging one another to grow more in love and being an Inspiration to each other. There is a country song that has lyrics that say “you make me want to be a better man”. Love that! Thank you Jesus for showing us who believe, how to love one another as you have loved us!
Jeremy & Melissa, We've been married 50 years. There have been good times and bad times but at the end of the day, we had each other. I used to tell our kids friends when they got married, "The secret to a long marriage is a short memory. Remember the good things, forget the bad things and don't bring up the past because you can't change the past!"
It originated as a Christian feast day honoring a martyr named Valentine, and through later folk traditions it has also become a significant cultural, religious and commercial celebration of romance and love in many regions of the world.
My wife and I have been married 31 years and we are pretty much as you have described. We don't even wear wedding bands, the ring does not make you married your heart and bond does. You have been married 20 years, I think what we each in our relationships have done and follow is successful where so many have failed. SO keep doing what you are doing, and don't worry about what others think... its working for you.
OUR ADVICE: Separate BLANKETS for sleeping.
Keep doing what you are doing. You are blessed indeed. Plus you have blessed all of us by letting us know you
Thank you so much
I think it is most important that you have your best friend as your partner in life. Someone who is there 24/7 for you. Married 50 this year. But together 55 years.
Far too many marriages/relationships these days a disposable, get into an argument thats just too hard too work out, so they walk away. For better or worse does not mean a thing these days. Very sad really.
My wife and I put communication as a top priority. If we ever have a bad argument we make sure to hash it out and never go to sleep angry. We talk about everything and make most of our decisions as a couple. We are blessed to be together now for 17 years, married for almost 10.
This September will be 53 yrs. Pregnant and married 2 months before my 17th birthday. No regrets, still the love of my life and my best friend. We have 3 children, 9 grandchildren, 2 great grandchildren. Life is good. God is good!
50’s to 66 were some of mine and my husbands best years. He got sick at 66, and I took care of his every need for 4 years; he died in his sleep January 11, 2023. Now, his body is whole, and in the presence of Jesus. I am so happy for him. I profoundly miss him every day!
❤️ thats beautiful
You cant take back nasty words. Dont go to bed mad at each other.
No public fighting.
Talk to each other.
Work towards your goals as a team.
Great video ❤
Happy Valentine's Day ❤❤
Extend the tree to Easter and hang easter decorations on it. I have hung blown eggs that I have colored on a tree branch painted white, planted in an empty coffee can that was covered in wrapping paper. Was so much fun.
Fourth of July after Easter and then on to fall. You can keep the tree up all year long!
We keep ours up until after Valentine’s Day! But now it is coming down. Love your podcast and your YT Channel!
Hi. You two are ahead of the life game.
It has taken me until my 50's to extend grace "easily" to others and to myself. Myself ...was harder; but, I've gotten there.
Thanks for your honesty and openness.
Sincerely... ongoing good thoughts and prayers to your and your family.
We have been married 46 yrs. And we have augment s but we get over it in half hour . And never go to bed without telling each other that we love each other . And we have always go together wherever. And sit together as a couple . Love you guys ! ❤😊
You guys are awesome I can see that God lives in your hearts and family
Always ❤️
Respect each other. I hear a lot that marriage is 50/50, that's not true. It's 100/100. I truly believe young adults now have a mind set that it's going to be all lovey dovey & a fairy tale. Melissa, I totally agree with you on going out to "bash" on your spouse. Unacceptable! I think it's wonderful that you & Jeremy want to do things together & together with your children. I love the idea of Valentine tree! Very creative & your kids will remember those special little things when older. Thank you for all you share & your honesty. I appreciate it & y'all.
You are not the only ones my daughter always decorates our Christmas tree for Valentines day it is up for the entire month of February
We just celebrated our 50th Wedding Anniversary. We don’t celebrate Valentines Day. We too feel like it’s a Hallmark $ making holiday. We take time every day to spend a few minutes together discussing the day, talk about things coming up for the week and just enjoying each others company. Love is a journey - enjoy the ride!
That is awesome!
I am 💯 in agreement with all you are saying about relationships! My husband and I will be married 46 years this year and he is still my best friend, the love of my life, and my safe space. Thank you for speaking truth!!!
This coming March 14 my husband and I have been married for 20 years. Our advice for marriage is to always choose love. There will always be hard days or weeks but you have to choose love during the good times and bad. Always keep God the head of your marriage!
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
Ecclesiastes 4:12
We did Valentine boxes when I was in grade school, this was in the 40's... also May Day baskets. Good fun for children.
Marriage and parenting is all about teamwork. Knowing deep inside you can always count on each other….and yes not expecting our life partner to make us happy all the time. Relationships do tend to work out more successfully when there is love, mutual respect, empathy, authentic listening, forgiveness, and a shared vision or goal for our lives together. Communicating our feelings , never hold a grudge, sharing laughs also helps !
My kids mom and I also had our 1st child about 18 months after we 1st met. We got married when she was 4 months pregnant, and we were both very young...so it happens lol. We went to a JP and had the reception at my best friend's cottage. Very inexpensive. Our honeymoon was 3 days at Niagara Falls which was a 3 hour drive for us at that time. Unfortunately, we divorced after 17 years of marriage and 3 children. We still see each other at grandchildren`s birthdays etc and still are polite and cordial with one another. To be honest, I had some sort of midlife crisis in my late 30s and made some very bad decisions for myself and my family. I look back and wish I had not made the choices I made, but it is what it is. Wishing you guys a happy Valentine`s day! If you ever have problems that seem overwhelming, do yourselves a favour and work through them...even if you need some help to do so. You seem to have a great marriage and relationship...so always find a way to work out issues. I look back and really wish I had done the same.
Excellent podcast that I totally agree with! The two becoming one is critical for faith-based relationships. After 50 years of marriage my wife and I are like Jeremy! We hate stretchy spandex pants and Walmart customers dressed in their pajamas! My best advice is “ listening to each other” before getting angry or judgemental! Avoid bullies and worldly players. I agree do NOT keep track of the negatives and stress over it! Your work ethic and accomplishments as a TH-cam couple is the highlight of your channel. Your parenting skills and faith have raised four beautiful children that I am proud of!
You are So Right about speaking out against your spouse. Talking down about them. I have been married 4 times. My first husband was from Peru. I really got married to get away from home. It wasn't right but I was pregnant when I met my 1st husband but I went back home and we never stayed in touch after I left. One day he ended up at my door, I didn't know how he found me but there he was. I was shocked because I lived in this little small town in WV. with under 500 people. I didn't even know he knew where I lived. I left Washington DC by Grayhound bus and didn't leave my address with him. Idk but even now 54 years later i don't know.
Anyway, he was good to my son and that's what mattered. He came with a friend and they spent the weekend and they went back to VA. We talked every few days and he came in to see us usually every other weekend. We had really good times and one weekend he asked me to marry him. A couple months later we got married. He then told me to see if my sister could keep my son until we could get an apartment. I didn't know that he didn't have his own apartment.. She said yes and so we got married and flew to Washington only to get there and his friends wife ended up in a mental hospital because she was jealous of me. I should have left then and there but didn't want to go back to WV. Anyway long story short, he didn't really want my son, I wasn't stable enough financially to raise my son by myself and my sisters husband was badgering me to adopt my son and was threatening to take me to court for child support or let them adopt him and I was too scared and weak and I let them adopt
him. I actually hated my husband by that time. He wouldn't let me get a divorce bc he used me to file for citizenship and you had to be married for several years before you could get a divorce. IDK, I wish I could erase all those years. My 2nd husband was a gem. He was amazing. He was everything my 1st husband wasn't. He was also a great father to my daughter from my 1st husband. He was the daddy she loved until he died 6 years later. Yes he was an amazing husband and father and I still miss him terribly.
I don't want to even talk about my 3rd husband (who ended up cheating on me and becoming an alcoholic or my 4th husband who was an addict to Crack Cocaine)! I now have been divorced for over 15 years, I'm 71 no more men in my life YES!!! I live my life for Christ now and am happy with my life choices !!!
We have been married in May 55 years. Like you...Valentine's day has not been a big day for us. I have a funny story though. 9 years ago my husband was having Physical Therapy for a shoulder operation. His cute and really nice therapist asked him what he was getting me for Valentine's day. Oh my...so I got a Orchid plant..my first Valentine's gift ever. The funny thing is that when he went back to his next appointment...she didn't even ask him what he got. He got the gift for no reason it seemed. His Therapist and I joked that I was going to send him every holiday for therapy so I will get a gift. We all had a big laugh over it. :)
#1…always take a minute or a breath and see the situation/argument for what it actually is! And always remember that being “right” should never come with the cost of hurting the one you love 😊
We don't really celebrate ourselves but we do stuff for the Grandchildren. We dis when kids were here. We did shoe boxes in school. It was great, with a little party. I love watching you guys. Lv and Prayers.
You have made great decisions for your kids and accepting of what will or will not come. I was always active in adult sports as was my wife so we never felt older until we reached our 60s, and while I gave up basketball at 50 due to an injury, I never felt age until maybe 65. However the 70s quickly let you knw you are in the senior years... It knocks you down so hard so fast, or at least for us.
Veterans day, and maybe Memorial day may be the least commercialized holidays, however any three day weekend is great for campgrounds, BBQ sales, and gas stations, not to mention all the retail stores with their "sales" which may or may not be actual reduced prices other than on paper. When I was in school in the late 50s and early 60s, we had the candy hearts there and at home, and we addressed Valentines cards to everyone in the class and exchanged them... My dad even exchanged joke valentines with friends and work buddies.
I love that you are each other's comfort. The way you respect each other is so admirable. It does have to be both people in the relationship working at it. (and p.s. not all divorcés are bitter and angry. wounded and healing, yes, but not bitter - speaking for myself who divorced because of abuse) ❤
So enjoyed this podcast. Reminisced about my own wedding. We have been married 41 years. Our wedding was small because we chose to buy a house rather than have a big wedding. Family only. Mother-in-law catered the food. Our wedding cake was a sheet cake. Our day started off with a bomb scare at the church. We ended up holding the ceremony in the nun's chapel which was actually perfect.
God bless your marriage and family all your days! We love your channel! My husband and I have been married 25 years this September, and went on our 1st date 10 years before that (as freshman in HS). Melissa.... totally agree... marriage is not about the illusive "Happiness". Our best learned advice... "Eyes on Jesus" (in good times, bad times, fun times, hard times.) Keeping eyes and focus on Jesus will always draw you to the same GOOD point.
My husband and I met the week I turned 18 in June, we were engaged in August, and married in November. We will be married 46 years this year and we celebrate our anniversary every year by going someplace special. We also go on a date every month on the 19th (the date of our wedding), usually a museum, thrift stores and dinner. We also live in North Idaho and there are a lot of really nice museums up here!
Don’t settle. Marry your best friend. We don’t like to be apart from each other. We truly miss each other when we are apart even when it is a few hours. Great discussion! ❤
I cant believe how much you two are like me and my wife! I wish i had a couple/family like yall that lived by us!
Totally agree about the company we keep separate from our spouse. It can cause problems.
32 years always be able to laugh with each other and respect each other’s feelings. Treat them how you want them to treat you!❤
Really loved listening to you both discuss this, my better half and me have decided to finally tie the knot after 30 years (and 2 boys) of being engaged. It never felt right for my partner but we are now both 60 and now we feel it is. So this May we are going to the Registry Office in the UK whilst on Holiday.
We are coming up to 60 years of marriage. We met when 15/16 years old. It’s been a bumpy ride with 3 children but I wouldn’t change a minute. He is my soul mate, best friend nd dream guy. At nearly 80 I still sneak a peek at him and think how lucky I am to have married him, even though he drives me round the bend at times. Life is good. God has been so patient with me. God bless you both and we wish you many many more years together. Love always.❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
It works when both people are committed and equally yoked. I made the mistake of marrying someone who hid that he had no morals or ethics. You can’t hide who you are forever. What you two have is rare and you are blessed.
I go by the belief that you can't rely on someone else to make you happy. That comes from within yourself.
First Valentine gift after we bought our house was a plumber! Roses would have been sooo much cheaper. Next year was my detached retina. We now just skip the whole thing and are going 32 years strong. Love you guys ❤
My husband and I paid for our own wedding at my sister in laws home. One suggestion is rather than parents paying for a big wedding, pay for a smaller, intimate wedding and use the money that would have been spent for a down payment on a home. That is how we got our first starter home and it was such a blessing.
September 17th will be 47 years. Divorce was and is never in our vocabulary. We have our money,our family,our friends. We spend 24/7 together, and we love it!!!
One of the best pieces of advice when planning my wedding was "something will go wrong, but no one knows but you so your guests don't have a clue" Your wedding day has so many wonderful memories & it sounds like it was a lot of fun.
Love your videos!
We've been married 41 years + and agree with you, No Out, our journey together is For Life!
❤❤❤
It’s 53 years today we had our first date. We have been married 51 years. Love your podcast
Richard and I will be married 62 years in June. Praise God. He is an important part of our life and marriage.
So many good comments, also.
God bless you.
Margaret
I borrowed my sister's dress too, and two months pregnant
You both talking about your wedding brought so many memory's back to our wedding 50 year`s ago. Many mishap's and adventure`s that day, Grandmother's hotel room robbed, husband late for wedding because Best Man's car caught fire, formal pictures of my grandmother and aunt`s no one could see two of hubby`s uncle`s drunk and out cold on the lawn 10 feet from us, we got locked out of parent`s house when we went to change for travel and the bride was lowered into the basement window to open door for the men, hotel room was given away and they could only offer a room with a single bed. All good story's to tell along the year`s.
We've been together 35 years and married 29. Our marriage is much like yours, we don't go out without each other.
We had a simple wedding, my dress was a white dress I had worn for Easter that year. My husband wore his khaki Army uniform. We have been married for 62 wonderful years and do not regret having a simple wedding because we have had exquisite marriage!
My hubby and I are celebrating our 49th anniversary on the 15th of February...best advice...God first, spouse second kids 3rd..lots of prayer, laughter, compromise, and patience...I had a nephew and his brother was bugging him..Isaac turned to Jacob and said..I'm not going to talk about it !! Best advice ever!!❤🙏
i am subscribed 👍🏼and i just love you two ♥️ married 40 years this november . got married in the house my husband built & still are living in it . we met in church at young ages of 13 & 15 & our house is built in an area we walked many a sunday afternoon when i got to go home with him till back to church for our youth group ♥️ it certainly is a continuous learning process & one that gets a little harder as you age .we are 67 & 69 ... but so appreciate hearing your views cause it certainly sounds as you are a family with a firm foundation 👍🏼❣️ thank you as always ‼️
I am 81 and still have a sweat shirt that together with my 7 year old granddaughter painted with Artex paint. This was such a memorable day for me. It has been at least 35 years ago. The small things are the glue of life.
❤️
I agree on going out on your Anniversary. I have been married for 47 years. Hubby has forgotten our anniversary twice.
Holy crow. You guys are so much like my hubby and I. Lol. A lot of our story is the same as yours. Almost 11 years and going strong over here. Cheers to you on 20 years!!
Loved this segment! So enjoy you both! Married 39 years this September. We both had prior marriages so decided our wedding would be very simple ( our families were half the country away). We did justice of peace, some meaningful words of our own and 2 friends as witnesses. Borrowed a simple dress and shoes, parents sent beautiful bouquet of flowers, I carried bouquet of nasturtiums from the garden, friend made us a wedding lunch as we went mountain biking. Only cost was wedding ring. We loved it! So almost 39 years married,41 together, and many phases of our life together it’s still working and so valued. Disagreements, arguments, exceptional adventures, schools, career changes, injuries, retirement and a love and respect for each other that continues. There is no other I want to be partnered with for the remainder of my life. It hasn’t always been easy and that’s life. And this life together has brought me such love, joy and partnership beyond words! Priceless!!❤️
We were both in the Navy stationed a the Navel Air Station Norfolk Va. I had 2 hours to get my self ready with the help of my Wave friends. We eloped to North Carolina. I had borrowed rings and some of my clothing. We celebrated with a hamburger and A Slits beer. 62 years later we are still together.
❤️
Nothing ventured, nothing gained. It’s all a learning experience this life of ours. All the best to all of you. 🥰
Our tree is left up all year long... we decorate it for each Holiday, this year we have hearts on the tree for Valentine's Day and hearts with Scripture on them for the Lenten season. We also decorate it for birthday months... It's so fun. Our wedding was at the courthouse, justice of peace, my sister and our son as our witnesses. We just wore everyday clothes, and our rings came from a pawn shop, although my husband did buy me a small engagement ring and yep, I just wear a simple band. We never share our bad moments with others (it opens the door to have other's opinion in the middle of our marriage), we keep it between us.
I'll never forget in second grade (1961) we had a make-shift post office in our classroom. My classmates would bring in those simple styled Valentine's cards beginning the week or two before the holiday. Each kid would take turns being the postmaster and separated them into a shoebox with our names on it. Come Valentines day the shoeboxes full of cards were given to each classmate to open their cards. My box was completely empty! I've never forgotten that day and I've never celebrated Valentines Day since. Be well Souza family!
We've been married for 36 years and relate very well to what you all have experienced. This Valentines Day was different, as my wife is helping one of our daughters and her husband with their first baby, getting ready for her second birthday some 300 miles away while I had commitments here in the area that prevented me from being there till a couple days later when we actually celebrate her birthday. But the commitment, closeness and love we have developed in our marriage means we have that flexibility to respond to the needs around us in addition to the joy we share together. I think that for us guys (this is the circle of guys I talk to, others may have different mileage on this) it is sometimes a sobering realization that our wives have a deeper love for the kids even after they are grown, and the grandkids that come along. I mean we guys love our kids and grandkids, but there is a difference that influences the thoughts, choices and desires a bit differently between the sexes. Since your kids are still fairly young, you have probably not run across this yet, but I think you will be well prepared for that time should you all experience that. Love your conversations, such a blessing to hear your thoughts, learn from you, laugh with you, share regret over circumstances while remembering similar times in our marriage that resonate well with what you all share!
I agree,my husband and i had small, very small, wedding.loved it full of love ...married for 40 yrs! And we married after dating 3 months 😊
This is the absolute best discussion I've watched you both do. Honestly, pure commitment and love you have for eachother.
You both were meant to be.
God blesses you both and your family! Your advice on relationships, marriage is so precious!
yesterday was our 48th anniversary. Love you guys. watch everything
Happy Anniversary ❤️
My wife and I got married at the county courthouse. Was a few of our friends and her parents (my parents live on east coast). Her dress was probably $30 at Target. I wore a dress shirt and tie that I had. Afterward we went back to inlaws for a reception that was cold cuts and simple snacks. Pretty sure we spent less than $300.
Although we couldn't afford it at the time, I did promise her we'd go to Disney World for our honeymoon. I made good on that promise 10 years later when we went for our 10th anniversary.
Last week was our 21st anniversary which, coincidently, we spent in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho finding an apartment. Been wanting to move to Idaho for years now, and it's finally happening next month.
I hope others will learn from this. It's like this has been lost and now relationships are in a mess. Keep up the good info out there. We need this. Thank-you.
So cool conversation. I agree totally with you on not needing or wanting to go out with the girls when I would rather spend my moments with loved ones. It is called acting single-married when one spouse goes out to party and leaves the other spouse behind. Number one advice pick the right person and watch for red flags ..holding grudges after a spat major red flag. Do not make your spouse feel like you have a back up plan.
68 years married to my best friend! Do unto each other as you want done unto you.
Y'all may not understand each others feelings; however, its very important to VALIDATE the feelings of your partner/children. Feelings are real..I was married 48 yrs before losing my hubby.
Find a way to have fun, show the importance of that person. Pray together, love our God.
Peace and blessings over all y'all and yalls family and adventures.
Blessings, julie
Hey, if y'all are weird than we're weird too!! And yes, do NOT keep score. Y'all are awesome, love you!
We’ve been together for 19 years, got engaged 5 years ago and got married Feb 2020. We got engaged after my mom passed, and my dad had been gone for years by that time. My brother was in aggregate care. The thought of a traditional wedding was breaking my heart, so we didn’t. And I didn’t want to spend a lot of money. We bought our house a few years before we got married so our financial responsibilities were already established.
My dress was rose gold, beaded & sequined. We had a justice of the peace (15 minutes), invited only family (14). Splurged on the location (hotel with ocean view) and a really nice dinner there after. Talked their bakery chef into doing a small cake, and my sister did the (gorgeous) flowers. It was $3,000 including rings. And it was exactly what we wanted.
Communication is key… and I mean when you aren’t in synch, when you’re unsettled, when you’re mind is churning. When it’s about your relationship and even more so when it’s just something you’re going through.
Fortunately for you two, you are liked minded. I didn’t realize what a true partnership looked like until I watched my daughter and her husband navigate through life with jobs and kids. I didn’t have that to observe when I was a kid/teenager and it’s a miracle that my daughter found it. I am so thankful for that. You are blessed and so are your children as they see what a true partnership should be and what to look for in a future partner.
Married 14 years, together 16. And I love hearing this. It's like me 5-8 years in the future. We are so similar to you ❤ my kids are still pretty small, and seeing yours grow up is scary for me!
You guys need to tell people that it doesn’t cost anything just to “subscribe.” Anyway, I love your commitment to one another! I have the same beliefs about my marriage that you have about yours. My husband is my best friend. We do have some separate activities…he plays golf with his guy friends, most all of them are married and they also bowl together. They don’t go to bars and hang out like they’re single. I have a group of girlfriends and we get together for dinner from time to time just to catch up. Two of the five are single but we don’t go to bars or do things that we might do if we were all single. Just good healthy times together. I love my girlfriends but they would never come before my husband. We will celebrate our 25th anniversary in July. You guys are an inspiration to many…no doubt. I love your podcast!
been married 51 years ... many ups and downs... communicate is a most. Bless you both.
You guys deserve each other. Your values are so good. So right on about so many things.
My wedding cost $500.00. We had flowers made out of toilet paper. They were pretty. We've been married 26 years.
What a fun wedding story. Thanks for sharing! ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
You (both) look marvelous! ❤❤
I love your love story. My husband and I have been together 40 and married almost 35. I can’t see myself without him although he’s been working away half the 40 years. Our absence makes our hearts grow fonder. He is my rock and I am his boulder. We’ve gone through a lot and I believe we’re still growing as a couple,faith,hope,trust and love and of course letting things go is what helps us grow.
🙏🏻✝️💜☮️☯️
To love fully. I held myself back for a while in fear of failure. I stepped out in faith and knew I had to give it my all. You have to let your spouse be who they are and know you will each have your own opinions and life will always throw up a roadblock where you will have to sometimes take on more of the load. We never had the woman and man roles as we each did whatever needed to be done. Early on I knew that he had the right to his own thoughts and how he responded to situations. It just worked for us. In our 60s now with health issues and slowing down we are so very thankful we never an I am out moment as neither of us could imagine not being here to love each other through this last chapter of life
Love this!! My engagement/wedding ring came from Walmart Black Friday sale!!