Funnily enough, lots of people seem to think that all gay people are inherently evil. And this is without even going into the queer coded villain trope.
"People gotta realise that gays can be bad too, this is an inclusive space" I chortled, especially seeing how queer-coded villains has been a running gag since the 70s or earlier XDDD
OP of the Damsel in Distress story here. Just wanted to say thanks for sharing my story! Rogue fortunately no longer plays with us, after making some other weird comments about romance regarding both my character and myself in real life. When he made the real life comments, I decided to message him privately. I won't get into the details because otherwise this comment would be super long, but the important thing to know is that he decided to leave the group and another game he was in with his roommates. Some of the others were told it was because of mental health reasons, but I did find it a little suspicious that it only became an issue when I decided to call him out for his behavior. That being said, I want to give him the benefit of the doubt. On the plus side, my brother-in-law is now playing with us, and everyone is getting along super well and roleplaying a lot more with each other. Thanks to a wonderfully supportive group, the fact that I'm the only girl rarely crosses my mind anymore. Thanks again for the stories and the advice!
@@docop8926 Ragging on each other isn't the problem when she said stop and it didn't is the issue. My friends and I rag on each other as well and we can go pretty hard but. When someone says CHILL or is not feeling it we back off of them.
We had 5 women and 1 man in my latest group. 2 women left, and 2 younger men joined, and they were asking for phone numbers by the end of the game. I asked privately if the guys should stay, and they original crew said it was a minor issue, one woman actually said it was a little flattering, so no need to use my Tarrasque-level DM powers to keep my table running smoothly. Dragon magazine Forum column had a similar problem written in October 1992, issue 186, page 92, from Halina Adamski. 30 fricking years, let's do better, people.
Lone woman in two separate groups here and I'm having a blast! Hold out hope, ladies. For every horror story out there, there are groups of newfound friends just having fun playing tabletops together.
SMH I can't belive BG3 isn't historically accurate... we need a mod that makes it more realistic. Remove all non-European characters, and of course we also have to remove the elves, tieflings, orcs and all that other fantasy BS and replace Baldurs Gate with Medieval London. Astarion can stay.
Don‘t forget the majority of armour, all the fancy clothes, the vampires, the magic and the gods of course. The githianky need to go and the tadpoles too. The mindflayers and the absolute are historically inaccurate as well, let’s replace all religions with Christians. And don’t even get me started on the names, pretty sure no one was actually called Shadowheart or Astarion.
I still don't know what "blackness in their voice" even means? Not every black person has that stereotypical accent, which I don't even think that statement is talking about.
And I’ve definitely made the mistake of assuming white people are black from only hearing their voices. No really, my mind was blown when I found out Iron Bull was voiced by Freddie Prinze jr
I unironically wrote a fan fiction for a friend which involved a character who would often used her "feminine charm" to get men to do what they wanted trying the same trick on a guard to gain entry into a villains lair. As a joke I had the guard come out as gay and tell her to piss off. I still get a chuckle when I think about it.
Its a completly valid and ok thing to happen, I've been a Forever Storyteller (Dungeon Master for Vampire the Masquerade), if you don't know what it is; in short imagine a D&D game set in on Earth, a fictional version of our Earth in modern time. But instead of having high fantasy races, its supernatural horror races, vampire, werewolf, ghost...etc. Vampire the Masquerade focus on Vampires as a sort of Shadowy group that exist in secret without the human race knowledge. Think like Blade the movie if you have seen it. Anyways in Vampire the Masquerade it's completely normal from the poiint of view of vampire at the very least to weaponize their beauty and s*x appeal to attract human in order to drink their blood. As a Game Master I usually tell the player depending on their sexual orientation they might not be interested at all. I usually have decided orientation of each NPC I reveal, for random NPC, I sometime decide on the spot or roll a dice and let RNG decide. So in my mind, the situation you described is 100% ok, it certainly can happen.
The BG3 mod skit at the beginning was exactly what I needed. And freaking THANK YOU for answering that common argument of "I bought the game I can do whatever I want with it" because that argument pisses me off to high hell and makes me go on lengthy tangents about mod hosting platforms, their TOS and that there is a matter of INTENT behind specific mods.
Yeah like it pisses me off how people rant and rave about how they should get the freedoms to do whatever they want but wanna throw fits when people tell them making and using mods to whitewash black characters is blatantly racist. In the same vein that they throw fits about black people wanting more black characters in games, they're more than welcome to peruse the gazillion majorly white ensemble cast games in literally every genre instead.
Yah like, you can do what you want, but if someone WANTS to change the game so that everyone's white and sexually appealing (to them) and meets their sexual expectations (in terms of romanceability) I'm gonna make the following assumptions: 1. They're a racist 2. They're a misogynist 3. They don't understand that people other than them are actually human beings with a right to live without reference to modder's pee-pee 4. They're controlling 5. They're uncurious, unempathetic, incapable of deep thought and also intrinsically unloveable. 6. They smell because they think washing their butthole is gay. And then I'm gonna use my freedom of speech to make fun of them.
People convince themselves that "that's racist" means "you can't do that", and they take it completely personally. They can't just admit to facts at all.
Yah, I really don’t care much if they want to whitewash Wyll, or whatever. But doing him like that is INSULTING! That’s the most boring looking person in the entire universe! Wth! At least make him Captain America. =/
I did a game where elves had to wear masks because they were so beautiful that it would've caused chaos; imagine something so beautiful you cannot fathom it normally. It made them both mysterious and down right FEARED. So yes you COULD take off your mask and attract people, but then a Helen of Troy thing would happen and cause wars over who gets to look at the entrancing, inhuman beauty.
i got put into a level 20 mini one shot for my first dnd 5e game. The dm made my sheet for me and managed to give me a dwarf fighter with 300 HP. Hilariously the most important lesson i learned from that game was that frontlining is not a solo job when the two spellcasters went into the air, the other melee fighter went to solo a boss and i was left surrounded by i think 5 undead that only failed to kill me because the cleric could mass healing word everyone back up to top HP.
OP from the last story here! DM had a home-brew rule where a double instance of advantage gave you immunity to the damage type. I was playing a path of the bear totem barb and Paladin had warding bond. The only thing I wasn't immune to was psychic, but I was resistant to it. And for a bit more world context: yes, DM's world was strange. It was something about the PC's being used as trading cards in a game played by people on a spaceship who acted as the gods of the world. When one god won the game, and all us trading cards died, the world reset and we all went to draft pick. It was a kinda cool idea but it was a little strange in practice.
Even if we were to equate Faerun to Europe, it would be more towards the Colonization era, 15th-19th century. They've discovered Maztica (Toril's version of the Americas) and a certain illegal enterprise has been transporting people back and forth from Chult and Kara-Tur. Add into that airships, interdimensional portals, and other fantastic means of travel, and there is no reason at all that you wouldn't find people of different ethnicities in a thriving port city like Baldur's Gate.
@@davidtaylor142 you a fucking retard for using "common era", also no there wasn't unless you are one of those racists who think Irish people are blacks
I'll spare you the art historian's rant but I personally believe that Baldur's Gate's architecture and landscape in game looks a lot like the architecture in Al-Andalus Spain (Spain when it was still a Muslim state) in the ~800s-1400s. During this time, the Iberian Penninsula was remarkably diverse, due to the spreading of culture, goods, and information from as far north as southern France, and as far south as nothern Africa and beyond. This was a high point for diversity in the region, which makes it a fully reasonable expectation that Baldur's Gate and the surrounding areas would be remarkably diverse in turn. Not to mention the legacy of the silk road allowing transit of goods, cultures, and people from the global east into Europe. Asian and african delegates and tradespeople would not have been an uncommon sight in Baldur's Gate's real-world equivalent. In other words, the racists modding POC out of this game are uneducated weenies, who'd a' thunk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Thank you for the intro. I don't want to go into detail, for my own privacy's sake. But just hearing someone else just call out these bullshit mods is really what I needed. Thanks for making my day a bit better Crispy. Great skit as always
"Come on, Robert, you're not going to be the only person who doesn't draw a card." "Oh yes, I am! In fact, I'm going to the other side of that ridge, 40 yards that way, so that whatever calamity you fools call down on yourselves doesn't affect me. Have fun getting screwed." I. Hate. The Deck of Many Things.
"We were forced to play games for his entertainment." Am I the ONLY one who had a sudden visual image of a wild and powerful mage LOOMING over a group of people, and shouting, "Now, ROLL!" at them, while they cower around a Monopoly game? Am I the ONLY one who now WANTS TO DO THIS IN GAME?! Set up the party, and make them think they're going to be pitched into a Battle Royale, only to be faced with some board game, instead? "It's The Game Of Life! But if you lose, the consequences are deadly!" "You mean, you'll kill us?" "No! You will be eliminated from the competition." "Because we'll be dead?" "No! You will be sitting on the sidelines, WATCHING OTHER PEOPLE PLAY and FEELING FOOLISH, because you are not OUT OF THE COMPETITION, because of your lack of skills. MOOOOHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAA!" "But, isn't that just what you're doing?" "NO! I am watching because I WANT TO! YOU will be watching because YOU HAVE NO CHOICE! I am entertained, and YOU will be BORED! It's so EVIL! You will be BORED TO DEATH!" "And, how long will these board games take?" "You will play until there is only one of you remaining victorious! It's a Play-Off! There can be ONLY ONE VICTOR!" "Oooooookay." "You will all suffer in SHAME before me!" Of course, the party CAN escape, but that WILL involve and ACTUAL boss fight with a great and powerful wizard. Or, they can slog their way through a Monopoly play-off. Their choice. But when they realize that he is using enchanted objects to cast "Hold Person" on the losers, so that they MUST watch the remaining games, and he does not need to maintain concentration on them, So, basically, they have to choose to fight him BEFORE they start the play-offs, because once they start, they are STUCK. In-game, I'd run it as a series of dice rolls against each other, like "Best six out of ten rolls," or something, to give JUST ENOUGH tedium to make it seem like a real Monopoly game. Mind you, I LIKE Monopoly, but I'm the only one in my entire family who will happily sit there for hours playing one board game. They all like their board games to last 30 minutes or less. So, I need to give the players the FEELING of tedium that comes with a long, drawn-out game, while still making it all about the D&D, and moving THAT game along. So, a series of roll-offs, PER MONOPOLY GAME, so you can feel the build-up and the tenseness of actual competition, and then the "It's all over" feeling when that sixth win is made, even before ten rolls, followed by, "Come on. The person has already WON. Why do we have to keep playing to completion? At this point, it's just EMBARRASSING."
I don't get the argument about being *realistic*? In the Forgotten Realms lore there are darker skinned people from the south in the swords coast region, especially in coastal towns. BG2 had Darker Skinned Party Members and NPCs, and people from as far afield as Karatur, RIP Yoshimo. The Same in NWN1. Wood and Wild Elves are said to have darker tan complexions and ditto about drow/half drow, deep gnomes and gray dwarves? I believe Ed Greenwood has spoken on this topic, why do they, feel like they would know more about the setting than the Creator of the setting?
Same thing with the homophobia. There is literally no instance in the DnD rulebooks nor novels nor anything else I can recall that says homophobia exists in Faerun. Christianity doesn't exist there, which was one of the major proponents of homophobia. (And while we're at it: clerics and paladins shouldn't be prude. I'm pretty sure there is no mention of that either.)
I think the last story's DM was confusing the bag of holding with the portable hole. A portable hole in a bag of holding makes a giant explosion that usually kills everything nearby
Actually the rulling is it creates a small explosion that drags everything in small radius into the astral plane. The whole "Murder time and space warping explosions" was more a rule of cool thing.
Having been in RPG fandoms for a long time, unfortunately white washing mods are extremely common. "White non-white character" mods and "Straight non-straight character" mods are to RPGs the way pine beetles are to forests. Mostly expected and impossible to wipe out and extremely parasitic.
To be clear: the reason Dark Souls traps work is because you respawn with minimal issues and learn from the experience. Ganking D&D characters like that without having players fully aware of that fact and with spare characters on hand is just not good DMing.
That's an assertion. If you enter a dungeon and slide down a trap door willingly. Then you shouldn't be suoeised when you have to roll a new character. Or to put it simply if you're level 1 and come across a t-rex, don't try to murder hobo rexy because you'll be a snack. Don't expect every DM to balance their games. Most don't have the skills, and some just don't care.
The Warlock in the third story is definitely part of a problem player archetype. We had one in our game, also playing a little girl Warlock. Thankfully, the group persists despite his loud and guilt tripping exit. Keep an eye out for malignant narcissists, kids.
Even outside of game settings, people like Warlock are a drag. Make absolutely zero attempts to participate in group activity, actively ignore attempts made by others to do so and then get mad when everyone stops bothering eventually. Petty behaviour for a teenager let alone a 30 yr old.
Someone named Keith winning with a boot to the head makes sense Also the fact that the DM tried to lie and other DMs still realized he was full of shit is pretty funny
Keith reminds me of an anime where the main character comes from a village that's next to the toughest dungeon in the world. He's considered a weakling there, making him stronger than most of the world's population without even trying. What others consider terrifying monsters, he calls animals. What he considers monsters, others call Demon Lords.
I think it’s less about historical accuracy and more about internal consistency - If we take an average medieval - level civilisation travel will take a long time and most people will be bound to the place they were born in. This leads to regions being rather homogenus. Major trade cities could be an exception though it would probably be on the borders of civilisations. There will always be exceptions - after all adventurers are often exceptional. It will make little sense for an isolated village to have the same diversity you’d find in a major american city in the current age. Now if you add certain anachronistic elements or widely available teleportation magic - seeing people from different cultures makes much more sense. Internal consistency is important for immersion - which is an important factor in rpgs.
@atenek9243 none of those things are necessarily true in dnd. Actual medieval Europe was full of non white people. It is 100% normal for a black person to be born in a medieval European setting. Not to mention you're presupposing the existence of an Africa that black people would "have" to come from. So no. There is no actual immersion reason to want less diversity in your fantasy setting. That's just racism.
@ My comment was general and not about dnd in particular. If you are gonna put diversity give it the thought it deserves and make it make sense. (Teleportation magic, trade hubs , migrations etc.) Interesting story elements will arise. People will default to the real world when no fantasy alternative is given - it’s an easy principle to grasp. And yes - putting diversity in places where the internal logic of it makes no sense will pull people out of their immersion as much as any other worldbuilding inconsistency. I am not telling you - don’t do diversity. I am arguing for making it fit seamlessly into the world so that it makes internal sense. Also I’m gonna ask you for source on the non-white populations of medieval europe - might be an interesting read.
@@atenek9243 and I'm saying that there are very few fantasy universes that that applies to. SOIAF is like the only kne I can think of and that's only because it's trying really hard to be a semi-realistic England. And it still has black characters because it's weird to remove them
@ Taking care of internal consistency applies to any setting. Again - I’m not telling you to ditch diversity - I’m telling you to give it the thought is deserves. It’ll make the world feel all the more real.
Last one I had Spider sense for the DM (without the spoiler) and Paladin. Paladin being upset and going nuclear was self-explanatory with how she was acting to Paladin and OP in general. However, the DM having dark souls traps (which is fine if cleared ahead of time with players, which I don't think happened and he just sprung it on them) plus the whole evil laugh signaled that yeah, this guy was not going to be clean either. The icing on that cake of course being the server nuke and lying about his group for sympathy. I think that DM wanted to do what was fun for him, at the expense of the party or by putting them in unfair situations. Good job on OP and his group for sticking together, may they continue on together.
16:20 Sometimes I worry when listening to these if any will be a story about me doing some shit I don't remember... but holy fuck I feel like I was a player in this exact game. Likely wasn't, but the classes, genders, levels, and certain details do line up from memory
If you don't remember, don't worry about it. As the lawyers say 'I have no knowledge of that event/ conversation.' But seriously don't worry too much about it. Having been in the military I can tell you even the most Rambo b@d@ss of the bunch has done something incredibly humiliating and utterly stupid. And there is at least one witness that won't ever let it die. As Spike Spiegel always says, "Whatever happens. Happens."
Crispy’s worst nightmare A campaign with an Artificer ally played by the DM with a False Hydra BBEG and a Deck of Many Things as a magical MacGuffin to deal with it
If he was Fighter/Totem Barbarian with Bear Aspect from the 2014 edition, he would be resistant to all forms of damage except psychic dmg. That along with the huge HP pool fighter and barbarian has, plus a decent AC you can weather through a lot.
Yup that's what my character was in the last story! Except dm had a house rule where double resistance got advantage, and bestie was a paladin with warding bond. I was immune to all damage except psychic, which I was only resistant to.
ehhhh... i dunno... sometimes the term "woke" is pretty accurate. example: "reparations" for black people that have never seen a second of slavery. the sins of the fathers and all that. like, thats pretty woke, they just want to see themselves as "holier than though"
Re: time limits When I first got my family to play D&D, my sister-in-law said she was afraid to play, because of being rushed. She'd been rushed before, and she DID NOT LIKE IT. I replied, "It's OUR game, and we can make a rule that there will be no rushing people's turns. You can take your time and consider your actions." I did, however, use a time limit in game, by counting the TURNS. Each turn takes six seconds. So, ten turns is one minute. You can give the group a "one minute" (or whatever time you set) count-down, yet still allow the PLAYERS to take their time to consider their actions. However, if they were talking, in character, I counted the seconds (out loud), so that they knew time was passing. They could consider things, out of character, all they wanted, but talking to each other, IN CHARACTER, made time move. So, you get the whole "Wheels slowly grinding" in the brain, and then out loud, saying those well-chosen, concise words to express the COMPLETED thought. I like to add pressure to the CHARACTERS, while protecting the PLAYERS.
As a member of the Fallout New Vegas modding community, the BG3 mods section at the beginning was hilarious. The Nexus has gotten better about not tolerating bigoted content and remarks, but goodness those bigots still crawl in through the cracks sometimes. Once my partner and I made a mod for Fallout 3 that changed the races of some slavers. Bethesda had made the slavers diverse, with all the leaders (Eulogy, Ashur) being black, so we just change some of them to be white to be more in-line with the history of American slavery. We only even changed ones that had been voiced by white guys anyway! Well, surely, all these reactionaries that love mods to make things "historically accurate" would have no problem with that kind of mod right? NOPE! Suddenly history didn't matter! "Why you making the *slavers* white?!" they cried, in between their larping as Legion legionaries.
Im surprised there's bg3 mod that does that. I remember Fallout 4 that got a similar mod. I think both mods are cringe. Mod your game however you want but don't act surprised if i mock you for it.
Damn that first horror story might be a horror for the rogue "how my whole group of DnD turned on me because of a plan I suggested" glad to see that the whole group was defending their friend, goated people
That clip of wyll being white makes me scream Everytime. Like i get ptsd from certain types of people's actions but holy hell this shit is actually scary
I’m not very familiar with Discord, but is it commonplace to just block people as a way of saying goodbye? It feels like it happens in every Discord story, even when the one blocking didn’t necessarily leave on awful terms. In my mind, blocking someone is such an extreme, last resort thing, but the impression I get from these stories is that it’s basically just normal Tuesday on Discord.
Never forget the brontosaurus nuke😂 If people forget just tell the story again. It's an amazing light hearted opener. It's a good giggle before you get to something completely horrific
12:15 nothing wrong with that. but I think OP in this story was pointing that out because A: the DM was /always/ running boss fights like a video game when they didn't have much experience with running encounters at all in the first place, and B: was doing it for a table full of new players who hadn't had much experience with the core system of dnd. Nor did it seem that they particularly asked for such a thing. I personally love when my DM hits us with mechanics and stuff in encounters, but I also have multiple campaigns worth of experience. If I was new again. I'd wanna learn the basics before throwing extra things in. Edit: also, homebrewing core rules back and forth EVERY session? things like the help action and stuff? no that's way too messy for a new DM and new players to be doing. as well as playing tier 3 characters off rip (starting at 11-15).
The Deadly Boots of Kieth reminds me of something that happened in one of the games we played when I was in the Marines... We were playing a generic fantasy game using GURPS, were we all played ourselves thrown into a fantasy world. By best friend had his character go by the name Connor McCleod (yes, he was a serious Highlander fanboy). Now, if your familiar with GURPS, it has an optional random hit location table that we liked to use where 9-11 were the torso: 9 was the chest, 10 was the abdomen, and 11 was (as you can probably guess) the groin. And I'm sure you can see where this is going... Yes, every time Connor rolled on the table, he rolled an 11. Every... single... time. It was made even funnier by the fact that his weapon of choice was a greatsword. We ended up giving him the moniker "Connor the Manhood Cleaver" (one guy actually did suggest "Connor the Cock Cleaver", but even he immediately dismissed the idea as too obviously crass, even for a bunch of Marines). It got to the point where I, as the GM, gave him a Reputation, both positive and negative. Our enemies would roll to see if they would recognize him and surrender or flee if they did (the positive), but other NPCs would treat him with reservation and suspicion (the negative... What kind of man cuts off other men's manhoods in battle?!?). The game didn't last that long ("Connor" ended up having to do a bunch of back-to-back TADs on another base), but it was kinda funny while it lasted.
I guess they changed bags of holding, used to be if you dropped a bag of holding into another or a portable hole into a bag that the 2 no occupied the same space of pocket dimension and since one can't exist in the other like any other object, it went BOOM for the total combined dimensions of space available in the two items
"Gay people can be evil too" just SENT ME
Funnily enough, lots of people seem to think that all gay people are inherently evil. And this is without even going into the queer coded villain trope.
Hi Koi! :D
I support gay wrongs!!
@@ofanichan Screw "be gay do crimes" can I get this alternate wording on a shirt instead?
@@ofanichan lol same!
The gay bandit skit is easily my favorite skit Crispy has ever done.
Same. I can't stop rewatching it. It's too good. My sides. x'D
"People gotta realise that gays can be bad too, this is an inclusive space" I chortled, especially seeing how queer-coded villains has been a running gag since the 70s or earlier XDDD
i am using the gay bandits in my campaing now
NGL I kinda wanna see more of that relationship. Evil work murder husbands for the win! 😂
Not gonna lie, I was totally down to watch a showcase of Crispy's BG3 mod loadout.
Cuz I was too😢😅
Me when the comment is good, but I can’t like it bc it has 69 likes:
Edit: nvm, also Crispy drop the mod loadout
@@nerd9777 Many are the times I have felt this pain...
OP of the Damsel in Distress story here. Just wanted to say thanks for sharing my story! Rogue fortunately no longer plays with us, after making some other weird comments about romance regarding both my character and myself in real life. When he made the real life comments, I decided to message him privately. I won't get into the details because otherwise this comment would be super long, but the important thing to know is that he decided to leave the group and another game he was in with his roommates. Some of the others were told it was because of mental health reasons, but I did find it a little suspicious that it only became an issue when I decided to call him out for his behavior. That being said, I want to give him the benefit of the doubt. On the plus side, my brother-in-law is now playing with us, and everyone is getting along super well and roleplaying a lot more with each other. Thanks to a wonderfully supportive group, the fact that I'm the only girl rarely crosses my mind anymore. Thanks again for the stories and the advice!
@@docop8926
Ragging on each other isn't the problem when she said stop and it didn't is the issue.
My friends and I rag on each other as well and we can go pretty hard but. When someone says CHILL or is not feeling it we back off of them.
We had 5 women and 1 man in my latest group. 2 women left, and 2 younger men joined, and they were asking for phone numbers by the end of the game. I asked privately if the guys should stay, and they original crew said it was a minor issue, one woman actually said it was a little flattering, so no need to use my Tarrasque-level DM powers to keep my table running smoothly.
Dragon magazine Forum column had a similar problem written in October 1992, issue 186, page 92, from Halina Adamski.
30 fricking years, let's do better, people.
Thoughts and prayers for our 'only woman in the group' sisters.
Lone woman in two separate groups here and I'm having a blast! Hold out hope, ladies. For every horror story out there, there are groups of newfound friends just having fun playing tabletops together.
Thanks to Mystra Ive been bless with normal male friends
I’m doing just fine so far, I’ve got a bunch of great bros!
'... And stuck as the DM' *sips tea*
SMH I can't belive BG3 isn't historically accurate... we need a mod that makes it more realistic. Remove all non-European characters, and of course we also have to remove the elves, tieflings, orcs and all that other fantasy BS and replace Baldurs Gate with Medieval London.
Astarion can stay.
Astarion can stay as long as he's not depicted as a vampire, but instead, just some rabid guy
And don't forget the shit rivers, you can't have London without genuine shit rivers
Don‘t forget the majority of armour, all the fancy clothes, the vampires, the magic and the gods of course. The githianky need to go and the tadpoles too. The mindflayers and the absolute are historically inaccurate as well, let’s replace all religions with Christians. And don’t even get me started on the names, pretty sure no one was actually called Shadowheart or Astarion.
I still don't know what "blackness in their voice" even means? Not every black person has that stereotypical accent, which I don't even think that statement is talking about.
Considering how blatantly racist the people complaining about "blackness in their voice", I doubt I'd want to know what they mean.
You need to tell those people that you are the captain now!!
And I’ve definitely made the mistake of assuming white people are black from only hearing their voices. No really, my mind was blown when I found out Iron Bull was voiced by Freddie Prinze jr
It means they know the VA is black and can't "unhear" aka unthink their racism now.
I assume they spoke exactly like Black Dynamite. Now why anyone would want to change that, I can't say. Just not cultured I suppose.
I unironically wrote a fan fiction for a friend which involved a character who would often used her "feminine charm" to get men to do what they wanted trying the same trick on a guard to gain entry into a villains lair. As a joke I had the guard come out as gay and tell her to piss off. I still get a chuckle when I think about it.
Its a completly valid and ok thing to happen, I've been a Forever Storyteller (Dungeon Master for Vampire the Masquerade), if you don't know what it is; in short imagine a D&D game set in on Earth, a fictional version of our Earth in modern time. But instead of having high fantasy races, its supernatural horror races, vampire, werewolf, ghost...etc. Vampire the Masquerade focus on Vampires as a sort of Shadowy group that exist in secret without the human race knowledge. Think like Blade the movie if you have seen it. Anyways in Vampire the Masquerade it's completely normal from the poiint of view of vampire at the very least to weaponize their beauty and s*x appeal to attract human in order to drink their blood. As a Game Master I usually tell the player depending on their sexual orientation they might not be interested at all. I usually have decided orientation of each NPC I reveal, for random NPC, I sometime decide on the spot or roll a dice and let RNG decide.
So in my mind, the situation you described is 100% ok, it certainly can happen.
Begone harlot! Your feminine wiles can not sway me, for I only desire the company of men!
The ballad of Keith of cracked me up. XD
I love stupid, funny, crazy stories like that.
The BG3 mod skit at the beginning was exactly what I needed. And freaking THANK YOU for answering that common argument of "I bought the game I can do whatever I want with it" because that argument pisses me off to high hell and makes me go on lengthy tangents about mod hosting platforms, their TOS and that there is a matter of INTENT behind specific mods.
Yeah like it pisses me off how people rant and rave about how they should get the freedoms to do whatever they want but wanna throw fits when people tell them making and using mods to whitewash black characters is blatantly racist. In the same vein that they throw fits about black people wanting more black characters in games, they're more than welcome to peruse the gazillion majorly white ensemble cast games in literally every genre instead.
Yah like, you can do what you want, but if someone WANTS to change the game so that everyone's white and sexually appealing (to them) and meets their sexual expectations (in terms of romanceability) I'm gonna make the following assumptions: 1. They're a racist 2. They're a misogynist 3. They don't understand that people other than them are actually human beings with a right to live without reference to modder's pee-pee 4. They're controlling 5. They're uncurious, unempathetic, incapable of deep thought and also intrinsically unloveable. 6. They smell because they think washing their butthole is gay. And then I'm gonna use my freedom of speech to make fun of them.
The intent is most likely bait.
People convince themselves that "that's racist" means "you can't do that", and they take it completely personally. They can't just admit to facts at all.
Yah, I really don’t care much if they want to whitewash Wyll, or whatever. But doing him like that is INSULTING! That’s the most boring looking person in the entire universe! Wth!
At least make him Captain America. =/
I did a game where elves had to wear masks because they were so beautiful that it would've caused chaos; imagine something so beautiful you cannot fathom it normally. It made them both mysterious and down right FEARED. So yes you COULD take off your mask and attract people, but then a Helen of Troy thing would happen and cause wars over who gets to look at the entrancing, inhuman beauty.
i got put into a level 20 mini one shot for my first dnd 5e game. The dm made my sheet for me and managed to give me a dwarf fighter with 300 HP.
Hilariously the most important lesson i learned from that game was that frontlining is not a solo job when the two spellcasters went into the air, the other melee fighter went to solo a boss and i was left surrounded by i think 5 undead that only failed to kill me because the cleric could mass healing word everyone back up to top HP.
Crispy you need to stop making out with other Crispys. It's way too hot for me to handle lol
I keep forgetting that my wife and I share the same account. XD
@@dislike_button33 HAHAHAHAH
@@dislike_button33 She's gonna see that you enjoy the funny dnd rat kissing himself, good luck solider.
That just raises questions regarding clone relationships.
@@El_chara Take this sentence out of context... 😂
The white Wyll isn't even like a Tumblr Sexy Man. He just looks like a generic white guy 😭
IDK it's the heterochromia and the green eyes. Like seriously, the sharp green eyes are SO off-putting.
@CrispysTavern its going to haunt my nightmares fjdnnsjs
For real though, Wyll is such a cutie how dare they. I only mod him to give him fuller hair.
tbf, a lot of tumblr sexymen are just White Guys
OP from the last story here! DM had a home-brew rule where a double instance of advantage gave you immunity to the damage type. I was playing a path of the bear totem barb and Paladin had warding bond. The only thing I wasn't immune to was psychic, but I was resistant to it. And for a bit more world context: yes, DM's world was strange. It was something about the PC's being used as trading cards in a game played by people on a spaceship who acted as the gods of the world. When one god won the game, and all us trading cards died, the world reset and we all went to draft pick. It was a kinda cool idea but it was a little strange in practice.
I was gonna say something about how cycles-ages stories can be nice and clean, but...
some people forget that faerune (i think the dnd worlds name is) isnt a medieval world.
its a fantasy world
Even if we were to equate Faerun to Europe, it would be more towards the Colonization era, 15th-19th century. They've discovered Maztica (Toril's version of the Americas) and a certain illegal enterprise has been transporting people back and forth from Chult and Kara-Tur. Add into that airships, interdimensional portals, and other fantastic means of travel, and there is no reason at all that you wouldn't find people of different ethnicities in a thriving port city like Baldur's Gate.
Not mention that even if it was black people were all over Europe since before the common era
@@davidtaylor142 you a fucking retard for using "common era", also no there wasn't unless you are one of those racists who think Irish people are blacks
i had to pause on the gay bandit to laught. omg that was Goldest thing i ever seen this week XD
As a black guy, gotta say, that opening skit was pure gold 🤣🤣
First time being early. Did not expect to see caucasian Wyll (Willy)
I'll spare you the art historian's rant but I personally believe that Baldur's Gate's architecture and landscape in game looks a lot like the architecture in Al-Andalus Spain (Spain when it was still a Muslim state) in the ~800s-1400s. During this time, the Iberian Penninsula was remarkably diverse, due to the spreading of culture, goods, and information from as far north as southern France, and as far south as nothern Africa and beyond. This was a high point for diversity in the region, which makes it a fully reasonable expectation that Baldur's Gate and the surrounding areas would be remarkably diverse in turn. Not to mention the legacy of the silk road allowing transit of goods, cultures, and people from the global east into Europe. Asian and african delegates and tradespeople would not have been an uncommon sight in Baldur's Gate's real-world equivalent.
In other words, the racists modding POC out of this game are uneducated weenies, who'd a' thunk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Thank you for the intro. I don't want to go into detail, for my own privacy's sake. But just hearing someone else just call out these bullshit mods is really what I needed. Thanks for making my day a bit better Crispy. Great skit as always
"Come on, Robert, you're not going to be the only person who doesn't draw a card."
"Oh yes, I am! In fact, I'm going to the other side of that ridge, 40 yards that way, so that whatever calamity you fools call down on yourselves doesn't affect me. Have fun getting screwed."
I. Hate. The Deck of Many Things.
“Keith…darnit, change your name, place, it’s not scary. Boris, try that…Keith, y’know? *OH, WATCH OUT FOR KEEIITTHH!!!”*
A person with taste I see.
😄
Welp, this is a clear sign to rewatch Hoodwinked. *LOVED* that movie.
Clearly someone hasn't heard of Bandit Keith, the intercontinental champion.
"We were forced to play games for his entertainment."
Am I the ONLY one who had a sudden visual image of a wild and powerful mage LOOMING over a group of people, and shouting, "Now, ROLL!" at them, while they cower around a Monopoly game?
Am I the ONLY one who now WANTS TO DO THIS IN GAME?! Set up the party, and make them think they're going to be pitched into a Battle Royale, only to be faced with some board game, instead?
"It's The Game Of Life! But if you lose, the consequences are deadly!"
"You mean, you'll kill us?"
"No! You will be eliminated from the competition."
"Because we'll be dead?"
"No! You will be sitting on the sidelines, WATCHING OTHER PEOPLE PLAY and FEELING FOOLISH, because you are not OUT OF THE COMPETITION, because of your lack of skills. MOOOOHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAA!"
"But, isn't that just what you're doing?"
"NO! I am watching because I WANT TO! YOU will be watching because YOU HAVE NO CHOICE! I am entertained, and YOU will be BORED! It's so EVIL! You will be BORED TO DEATH!"
"And, how long will these board games take?"
"You will play until there is only one of you remaining victorious! It's a Play-Off! There can be ONLY ONE VICTOR!"
"Oooooookay."
"You will all suffer in SHAME before me!"
Of course, the party CAN escape, but that WILL involve and ACTUAL boss fight with a great and powerful wizard. Or, they can slog their way through a Monopoly play-off. Their choice.
But when they realize that he is using enchanted objects to cast "Hold Person" on the losers, so that they MUST watch the remaining games, and he does not need to maintain concentration on them, So, basically, they have to choose to fight him BEFORE they start the play-offs, because once they start, they are STUCK.
In-game, I'd run it as a series of dice rolls against each other, like "Best six out of ten rolls," or something, to give JUST ENOUGH tedium to make it seem like a real Monopoly game. Mind you, I LIKE Monopoly, but I'm the only one in my entire family who will happily sit there for hours playing one board game. They all like their board games to last 30 minutes or less. So, I need to give the players the FEELING of tedium that comes with a long, drawn-out game, while still making it all about the D&D, and moving THAT game along. So, a series of roll-offs, PER MONOPOLY GAME, so you can feel the build-up and the tenseness of actual competition, and then the "It's all over" feeling when that sixth win is made, even before ten rolls, followed by, "Come on. The person has already WON. Why do we have to keep playing to completion? At this point, it's just EMBARRASSING."
i remember seeing the “removes black people”mod…. and the WHOLE forum that actively looks for and makes the “anti-woke” mods…
Russians really love the mod that removes "historical inaccurate people" from a fantasy game, bruh.
28:30 I love the brontosaurus nuke joke, it’s one of my favourite reoccurring bits
We remember the brontosaurus !
Your skits just get better and better.
I don't get the argument about being *realistic*? In the Forgotten Realms lore there are darker skinned people from the south in the swords coast region, especially in coastal towns. BG2 had Darker Skinned Party Members and NPCs, and people from as far afield as Karatur, RIP Yoshimo. The Same in NWN1. Wood and Wild Elves are said to have darker tan complexions and ditto about drow/half drow, deep gnomes and gray dwarves? I believe Ed Greenwood has spoken on this topic, why do they, feel like they would know more about the setting than the Creator of the setting?
Yeah, Greenwood might be weird sometimes (eg tiefling milk flavor), but he always seemed like a reasonably inclusive guy to me.
Same thing with the homophobia. There is literally no instance in the DnD rulebooks nor novels nor anything else I can recall that says homophobia exists in Faerun. Christianity doesn't exist there, which was one of the major proponents of homophobia. (And while we're at it: clerics and paladins shouldn't be prude. I'm pretty sure there is no mention of that either.)
@@Mithcoriel lol clerics and paladins of Sune Prudes? 🤣
Same reason why _that_ sliver of the Guilty Gear fandom refused to accept Brisket's new(ish, it's been a while now) lore: they're bigots.
Was scratching at my neck like an addict waiting for another video to binge through lmao
I think the last story's DM was confusing the bag of holding with the portable hole. A portable hole in a bag of holding makes a giant explosion that usually kills everything nearby
Actually the rulling is it creates a small explosion that drags everything in small radius into the astral plane.
The whole "Murder time and space warping explosions" was more a rule of cool thing.
I'm just here to say that the nuclear brontosaurus gag makes me smile every time. It's never dead.
0:22 launched me back to 2013 with minecraft mod showcases lol
Same!
Crispy, where the hell do you keep finding this weird shit?! I mean, those Mods are absolutely fucked!
I think a lot of the time, it's other people emailing about it. But with mods, you sadly don't often have to look far to find the racism.
Having been in RPG fandoms for a long time, unfortunately white washing mods are extremely common. "White non-white character" mods and "Straight non-straight character" mods are to RPGs the way pine beetles are to forests. Mostly expected and impossible to wipe out and extremely parasitic.
@@swishfish8858 I haven't found them yet, yay.
Word spreads, especially stupid discrimination stuff. I heard about "white Wyll" mod long before this.
The mod skit was top tier. 😂 TBF I would totally watch Crispys Mod run. 🎉
HOW DARE THEY DEFILE WYLL!!
Leave that to the Devil Patron!!
@@DaMuss-e2w That's right!
Wait a minute...
To be clear: the reason Dark Souls traps work is because you respawn with minimal issues and learn from the experience. Ganking D&D characters like that without having players fully aware of that fact and with spare characters on hand is just not good DMing.
That's an assertion. If you enter a dungeon and slide down a trap door willingly. Then you shouldn't be suoeised when you have to roll a new character. Or to put it simply if you're level 1 and come across a t-rex, don't try to murder hobo rexy because you'll be a snack. Don't expect every DM to balance their games. Most don't have the skills, and some just don't care.
NO ! DON'T STOP THE BRONTOSAURUS JOKE ! I swear I remember it xD
The brontosaurus joke is never going to get off. I love it.
The Warlock in the third story is definitely part of a problem player archetype. We had one in our game, also playing a little girl Warlock. Thankfully, the group persists despite his loud and guilt tripping exit. Keep an eye out for malignant narcissists, kids.
Even outside of game settings, people like Warlock are a drag. Make absolutely zero attempts to participate in group activity, actively ignore attempts made by others to do so and then get mad when everyone stops bothering eventually. Petty behaviour for a teenager let alone a 30 yr old.
"what do they deal with in the summer?"
elf raids, according to the story. 😅
I for one really enjoy the Brontosaurus joke. Keep using it king!
White Tumblr Sexyman Wyll isn't real, he can't hurt me
White Tumblr Sexyman Wyll: 🌝
Of course he can't hurt you. The slightest slap of a flaccid glove would end him.
Someone named Keith winning with a boot to the head makes sense
Also the fact that the DM tried to lie and other DMs still realized he was full of shit is pretty funny
They must have gotten used to bullshit online. OR that his lies were so transparent a blind man could see through them.
When a DM starts comparing their traps to Dark Souls, you know things are going to suck.
That intro bit was fire!
Keith reminds me of an anime where the main character comes from a village that's next to the toughest dungeon in the world. He's considered a weakling there, making him stronger than most of the world's population without even trying. What others consider terrifying monsters, he calls animals. What he considers monsters, others call Demon Lords.
"It's not historically accurate to have black people in this.... fantasy... realm..."
I think it’s less about historical accuracy and more about internal consistency - If we take an average medieval - level civilisation travel will take a long time and most people will be bound to the place they were born in.
This leads to regions being rather homogenus. Major trade cities could be an exception though it would probably be on the borders of civilisations.
There will always be exceptions - after all adventurers are often exceptional.
It will make little sense for an isolated village to have the same diversity you’d find in a major american city in the current age.
Now if you add certain anachronistic elements or widely available teleportation magic - seeing people from different cultures makes much more sense.
Internal consistency is important for immersion - which is an important factor in rpgs.
@atenek9243 none of those things are necessarily true in dnd. Actual medieval Europe was full of non white people. It is 100% normal for a black person to be born in a medieval European setting. Not to mention you're presupposing the existence of an Africa that black people would "have" to come from.
So no. There is no actual immersion reason to want less diversity in your fantasy setting. That's just racism.
@ My comment was general and not about dnd in particular. If you are gonna put diversity give it the thought it deserves and make it make sense. (Teleportation magic, trade hubs , migrations etc.)
Interesting story elements will arise.
People will default to the real world when no fantasy alternative is given - it’s an easy principle to grasp.
And yes - putting diversity in places where the internal logic of it makes no sense will pull people out of their immersion as much as any other worldbuilding inconsistency.
I am not telling you - don’t do diversity. I am arguing for making it fit seamlessly into the world so that it makes internal sense.
Also I’m gonna ask you for source on the non-white populations of medieval europe - might be an interesting read.
@@atenek9243 and I'm saying that there are very few fantasy universes that that applies to.
SOIAF is like the only kne I can think of and that's only because it's trying really hard to be a semi-realistic England. And it still has black characters because it's weird to remove them
@ Taking care of internal consistency applies to any setting. Again - I’m not telling you to ditch diversity - I’m telling you to give it the thought is deserves. It’ll make the world feel all the more real.
1:09 and just when you thought it couldn't possibly get More racist💀
28:17 NOOOO DONT KILL THE BRONTOSAURUS NUKE JOKE, I REMEMBER IT! I GRT IT!!@
The gay bandits are my new favorite characters in anything ever
The algo summoned me.
I didn't expect gay crime. Liked and subscribed.
5:37 Your love scenes are the best. XD
0:36 I’m very new to D&D as well as Baldur’s Gate and Wyll is so far my favourite and this hurt my soul deeply, what happened to him…
mccrispy is back at it again, lovely and unhinged vid as ever 🙏🙏
Last one I had Spider sense for the DM (without the spoiler) and Paladin. Paladin being upset and going nuclear was self-explanatory with how she was acting to Paladin and OP in general. However, the DM having dark souls traps (which is fine if cleared ahead of time with players, which I don't think happened and he just sprung it on them) plus the whole evil laugh signaled that yeah, this guy was not going to be clean either. The icing on that cake of course being the server nuke and lying about his group for sympathy. I think that DM wanted to do what was fun for him, at the expense of the party or by putting them in unfair situations. Good job on OP and his group for sticking together, may they continue on together.
16:20 Sometimes I worry when listening to these if any will be a story about me doing some shit I don't remember... but holy fuck I feel like I was a player in this exact game. Likely wasn't, but the classes, genders, levels, and certain details do line up from memory
If you don't remember, don't worry about it. As the lawyers say 'I have no knowledge of that event/ conversation.'
But seriously don't worry too much about it. Having been in the military I can tell you even the most Rambo b@d@ss of the bunch has done something incredibly humiliating and utterly stupid. And there is at least one witness that won't ever let it die. As Spike Spiegel always says, "Whatever happens. Happens."
I think the brontosaurus nuke video was the first one I watched! its always fun to see it come back again
Hey you cant just bring out the kahoot music and only have me boogie-ing for a second
Crispy’s worst nightmare
A campaign with an Artificer ally played by the DM with a False Hydra BBEG and a Deck of Many Things as a magical MacGuffin to deal with it
Thank you for sharing my story 😊
I always appreciate the BrontoNuke
If he was Fighter/Totem Barbarian with Bear Aspect from the 2014 edition, he would be resistant to all forms of damage except psychic dmg. That along with the huge HP pool fighter and barbarian has, plus a decent AC you can weather through a lot.
Yup that's what my character was in the last story! Except dm had a house rule where double resistance got advantage, and bestie was a paladin with warding bond. I was immune to all damage except psychic, which I was only resistant to.
1:10 HAD MY JAW DROPPED HOLY SHIT 🤣😭😭
Anyone who uses "woke" as a pejorative automatically has an opinion that means less than nothing.
ehhhh... i dunno...
sometimes the term "woke" is pretty accurate.
example: "reparations" for black people that have never seen a second of slavery.
the sins of the fathers and all that.
like, thats pretty woke, they just want to see themselves as "holier than though"
Making the super rolling character a weakling from Mary sue town is really funny and a great idea
Re: time limits
When I first got my family to play D&D, my sister-in-law said she was afraid to play, because of being rushed. She'd been rushed before, and she DID NOT LIKE IT.
I replied, "It's OUR game, and we can make a rule that there will be no rushing people's turns. You can take your time and consider your actions."
I did, however, use a time limit in game, by counting the TURNS.
Each turn takes six seconds. So, ten turns is one minute. You can give the group a "one minute" (or whatever time you set) count-down, yet still allow the PLAYERS to take their time to consider their actions.
However, if they were talking, in character, I counted the seconds (out loud), so that they knew time was passing. They could consider things, out of character, all they wanted, but talking to each other, IN CHARACTER, made time move.
So, you get the whole "Wheels slowly grinding" in the brain, and then out loud, saying those well-chosen, concise words to express the COMPLETED thought.
I like to add pressure to the CHARACTERS, while protecting the PLAYERS.
Question, Keith: Do you donate your share of the treasure to the people of Calgary do they can afford to move somewhere decent?
And one more for Jenny and the Wimp.
Don't worry Crispy, I still find the brontosaurus joke funny.
I get the joke, Crispy! I will ALWAYS get the Brontosaurus joke!!!
The gay bandit skit cracked me up
Is that Alfred-Eggman at 18:36?! that's incredible
This is my face while listening the beginning 👁👄👁
Thank you for reading the tale of Keith! I wouldn't call it a glory story, tho 😹
CRISPY NOO I got the brontosaurus reference!! XD Not only that, I chuckled!
HUGE missed opportunity to use the Pheonix Wright Boot to the Head video for that glory story!
Only at the end of the intro, but that alone sent me. Glad I'm alone bc the cackle I gave was giving "dying hyena"
28:16 You say that, but I hit like on the video where the Brontosaurus Nuke came from. I’ll NEVER forget it.❤
As a member of the Fallout New Vegas modding community, the BG3 mods section at the beginning was hilarious. The Nexus has gotten better about not tolerating bigoted content and remarks, but goodness those bigots still crawl in through the cracks sometimes. Once my partner and I made a mod for Fallout 3 that changed the races of some slavers. Bethesda had made the slavers diverse, with all the leaders (Eulogy, Ashur) being black, so we just change some of them to be white to be more in-line with the history of American slavery. We only even changed ones that had been voiced by white guys anyway! Well, surely, all these reactionaries that love mods to make things "historically accurate" would have no problem with that kind of mod right? NOPE! Suddenly history didn't matter! "Why you making the *slavers* white?!" they cried, in between their larping as Legion legionaries.
Pretty sure the guy from the Damsel in Distress story was in an episode of Rocko's Modern Life: th-cam.com/video/LaKnzrNFLYU/w-d-xo.html
Im surprised there's bg3 mod that does that. I remember Fallout 4 that got a similar mod. I think both mods are cringe. Mod your game however you want but don't act surprised if i mock you for it.
Bro made me remember PopularMMOs and broke my heart all over again
Real. I grew up watching that guy, now he has no internet presence at all afaik.
Damn that first horror story might be a horror for the rogue "how my whole group of DnD turned on me because of a plan I suggested" glad to see that the whole group was defending their friend, goated people
That clip of wyll being white makes me scream Everytime. Like i get ptsd from certain types of people's actions but holy hell this shit is actually scary
I’m not very familiar with Discord, but is it commonplace to just block people as a way of saying goodbye? It feels like it happens in every Discord story, even when the one blocking didn’t necessarily leave on awful terms. In my mind, blocking someone is such an extreme, last resort thing, but the impression I get from these stories is that it’s basically just normal Tuesday on Discord.
Never forget the brontosaurus nuke😂
If people forget just tell the story again. It's an amazing light hearted opener. It's a good giggle before you get to something completely horrific
Yooo, the channel intro goes so hard
all this fuss, im just here waiting for the Lizardfolk mod to come to Console...
I'm waiting for the Tabaxi mod to finish and come to console and the shotgun mod to be fixed so I can make a cat with a gun.
@@feralchangeling97 A guncat?
@@DaMuss-e2w a mystic gun cat.
"Tactical Brontosaurus Nuke Inbound!"
12:15 nothing wrong with that. but I think OP in this story was pointing that out because A: the DM was /always/ running boss fights like a video game when they didn't have much experience with running encounters at all in the first place, and B: was doing it for a table full of new players who hadn't had much experience with the core system of dnd. Nor did it seem that they particularly asked for such a thing.
I personally love when my DM hits us with mechanics and stuff in encounters, but I also have multiple campaigns worth of experience. If I was new again. I'd wanna learn the basics before throwing extra things in.
Edit: also, homebrewing core rules back and forth EVERY session? things like the help action and stuff? no that's way too messy for a new DM and new players to be doing. as well as playing tier 3 characters off rip (starting at 11-15).
NOOOOO I LOVE THE BRONTOSAURUS JOKE!!!
I love the raid boss mechanics that IO phase 2 has. Made the fights super tough and fun to watch.
just fyi, the brontosaurus nuke joke isn't dead yet. I still laughed.
The Deadly Boots of Kieth reminds me of something that happened in one of the games we played when I was in the Marines...
We were playing a generic fantasy game using GURPS, were we all played ourselves thrown into a fantasy world. By best friend had his character go by the name Connor McCleod (yes, he was a serious Highlander fanboy).
Now, if your familiar with GURPS, it has an optional random hit location table that we liked to use where 9-11 were the torso: 9 was the chest, 10 was the abdomen, and 11 was (as you can probably guess) the groin. And I'm sure you can see where this is going... Yes, every time Connor rolled on the table, he rolled an 11. Every... single... time. It was made even funnier by the fact that his weapon of choice was a greatsword.
We ended up giving him the moniker "Connor the Manhood Cleaver" (one guy actually did suggest "Connor the Cock Cleaver", but even he immediately dismissed the idea as too obviously crass, even for a bunch of Marines). It got to the point where I, as the GM, gave him a Reputation, both positive and negative. Our enemies would roll to see if they would recognize him and surrender or flee if they did (the positive), but other NPCs would treat him with reservation and suspicion (the negative... What kind of man cuts off other men's manhoods in battle?!?). The game didn't last that long ("Connor" ended up having to do a bunch of back-to-back TADs on another base), but it was kinda funny while it lasted.
I guess they changed bags of holding, used to be if you dropped a bag of holding into another or a portable hole into a bag that the 2 no occupied the same space of pocket dimension and since one can't exist in the other like any other object, it went BOOM for the total combined dimensions of space available in the two items
Honest question, but how does one play a damsel in distress in D&D? Do you just ask the DM to kidnap your character at some point?
that mod does Will so dirty what the hell ToT
Keith sounds like fun. Every group needs a Keith in some campaigns.
Yay Brontosaurus nuke makes a comeback
The worst thing that could’ve actually happened would’ve been a Bagman tbh