As a therapist who specializes in senior leadership counselling I have noticed there is a real challenge with the changing dynamic of the workplace. Coming out of the narcissistic, dog-eat-dog environment to a more egalitarian worker focus, this is particularly tough for old-school managers. What worked for decades is now seen as downright toxic and many are suffering. So glad to see that inclusivity and respect are the standard!
I currently work in this environment, every decision is based solely on who the favorites are in that moment... also people who do wrong by others are never called out. Management is weak and never provides guidance or makes decisions, at the same time they want everything to be approved by them. It almost seems like they dont want to come up with ideas so they can be absolved of all responsibility later on. On the other hand they are constantly gossiping behind employees backs. It has created such a bad environment, half of the staff has left the company in the last 3 months.
I came from the same environment one woman was seen as doing nothing wrong but failed to do there job. I ended up retiring. I wanted to do a few things but I said the heck with it., loser woman and I wish I could put the real name down and workplace
Bailed out on any job that starts doing this. Generally I never stay more than three years, but I work on bailing out even if it is sooner than that when the workplace turns to this.
My old boss, a CEO, had clear favorites on his leadership team. I remember one time, during a leadership meeting, his favorite WALKED OUT in the middle of the meeting to get treats from their team mates, came back, treated everyone else like garbage... and my boss chastised SOMEONE ELSE! It was like being in a bizarre land with topsy turvy social rules! It was so bad that the HR Rep casually acknowledged his favoritism, and shrugged it off as there was nothing she could do. Unsurprisingly, it turned out to be my most toxic job. I think favoritism can also be a red flag that other poor management behaviors will follow.
I’m proud that I’m not a jerk and play favorites with my team. I’ve currently promoted about half of my team. Those that earned it. However, watching this has made me realize I need to put more attention towards the other half and help mold them. I’m going to start working on that tomorrow. I appreciate your videos!
Is there a video on people pleasing managers? Placating people left and right. Inconsistent communication. A reluctance to address issues until it's out of control.
Pro Tip: Don't promise an employee career progression, provide nothing but positive feedback, and then give the promotion to your favorite person instead. That reflects... poorly on you.
Personally, I find working on your own goals more rewarding than favorites. I used to be a supervisor, and to be honest, that has more challenges these days than 20 years ago. It's actually hilarious to see when managers come to new employees with concerns about staff retention and contract loss. I got complaints left right and center AND personal emails from management targeting myself for a team's issues 😂 As just a new employee, somehow I didn't realize I was the owner's boss. Luckily I left that job.
You didn't know you were the owner's boss? Or the owner was so incompetent that s/he asked you for your advice all the time? I am glad you left a long time ago.
Even more weird is when management ass kiss towards staff. That just upsets the whole dynamic and who the real boss is. Staff and management should be able to work together to solve issues, but when the rest don't want to speak up, what can you do? Not a lot and nothing is solved.
Hello from Canada! I work for a family-owned business. I want to report my boss’s insane favouritism to HR,He always treats me as trash. HR and the other employees are his old acquaintances. My colleagues are rude and lazy but they can do whatever they want because they are his favourites. Management is so toxic. I'm having a mental breakdown right now.
I hope you read your reply 3 months ago. If HR are buddies with your boss, complaining about anything will probably get you fired, if you haven't already. You were always an outsider; probably treated like a slave so everyone could goof off all the time. I hope you found something better since.
Boss has let power rush to his head like a snort of cocaine. He DEMANDS everyone to fear him because his village idiots are desperate and can't live without his job.
I work in a high school and our Principal allows out athletic director to use chewing tobacco during the work day. Big dip in his lips that students can clearly see-WTF
Get used to it. Nepotism and favoritism exists in every company. You either like your boss and the klique or you don't. If you don't, you'd be lucky if everyone ignores you. If you are not so fortunate, they will pick on you like high school bullies for their sadistic amusement. If they treat you like garbage, look for another job. When you get a job offer and put on a new work schedule, don't tell your former boss. Just don't show up. Fuck em. You don't need your old, jerk boss and his wolfpack for a reference anyways.
As a therapist who specializes in senior leadership counselling I have noticed there is a real challenge with the changing dynamic of the workplace. Coming out of the narcissistic, dog-eat-dog environment to a more egalitarian worker focus, this is particularly tough for old-school managers. What worked for decades is now seen as downright toxic and many are suffering. So glad to see that inclusivity and respect are the standard!
I currently work in this environment, every decision is based solely on who the favorites are in that moment... also people who do wrong by others are never called out. Management is weak and never provides guidance or makes decisions, at the same time they want everything to be approved by them. It almost seems like they dont want to come up with ideas so they can be absolved of all responsibility later on. On the other hand they are constantly gossiping behind employees backs.
It has created such a bad environment, half of the staff has left the company in the last 3 months.
I came from the same environment one woman was seen as doing nothing wrong but failed to do there job. I ended up retiring. I wanted to do a few things but I said the heck with it., loser woman and I wish I could put the real name down and workplace
You must’ve worked at my old job too‼️
Bailed out on any job that starts doing this. Generally I never stay more than three years, but I work on bailing out even if it is sooner than that when the workplace turns to this.
there will always be favorites always..everywhere I worked there is favoritism and it will never change sadly.
My old boss, a CEO, had clear favorites on his leadership team. I remember one time, during a leadership meeting, his favorite WALKED OUT in the middle of the meeting to get treats from their team mates, came back, treated everyone else like garbage... and my boss chastised SOMEONE ELSE! It was like being in a bizarre land with topsy turvy social rules! It was so bad that the HR Rep casually acknowledged his favoritism, and shrugged it off as there was nothing she could do.
Unsurprisingly, it turned out to be my most toxic job. I think favoritism can also be a red flag that other poor management behaviors will follow.
I’m proud that I’m not a jerk and play favorites with my team. I’ve currently promoted about half of my team. Those that earned it. However, watching this has made me realize I need to put more attention towards the other half and help mold them. I’m going to start working on that tomorrow. I appreciate your videos!
And, how did it work out?
Is there a video on people pleasing managers? Placating people left and right. Inconsistent communication. A reluctance to address issues until it's out of control.
facing the same issue now - would really appreciate some guidance for those of us being managed by such managers
I work in an environment of fake support.. it is sad
Pro Tip: Don't promise an employee career progression, provide nothing but positive feedback, and then give the promotion to your favorite person instead. That reflects... poorly on you.
Personally, I find working on your own goals more rewarding than favorites. I used to be a supervisor, and to be honest, that has more challenges these days than 20 years ago. It's actually hilarious to see when managers come to new employees with concerns about staff retention and contract loss. I got complaints left right and center AND personal emails from management targeting myself for a team's issues 😂
As just a new employee, somehow I didn't realize I was the owner's boss. Luckily I left that job.
You didn't know you were the owner's boss? Or the owner was so incompetent that s/he asked you for your advice all the time? I am glad you left a long time ago.
its not that the rest of us aren't good enough. we just aren't ass kissers. Gender favoritism is part of it too.
Even more weird is when management ass kiss towards staff. That just upsets the whole dynamic and who the real boss is. Staff and management should be able to work together to solve issues, but when the rest don't want to speak up, what can you do? Not a lot and nothing is solved.
Exactly
Hello from Canada! I work for a family-owned business. I want to report my boss’s insane favouritism to HR,He always treats me as trash. HR and the other employees are his old acquaintances. My colleagues are rude and lazy but they can do whatever they want because they are his favourites. Management is so toxic. I'm having a mental breakdown right now.
Get a new job and leave quickly.
I hope you read your reply 3 months ago. If HR are buddies with your boss, complaining about anything will probably get you fired, if you haven't already. You were always an outsider; probably treated like a slave so everyone could goof off all the time. I hope you found something better since.
When the people pleaser is the favorite...
Boss has let power rush to his head like a snort of cocaine. He DEMANDS everyone to fear him because his village idiots are desperate and can't live without his job.
I would love to talk with you! Full of information and knowledge that I need oh so very bad!
👏very well sayed
It’s not about hard work and initiative, let alone level of education or other qualifications…it’s about ass kissing, nepotism, etc.
And you have to clean up their messes
I work in a high school and our Principal allows out athletic director to use chewing tobacco during the work day. Big dip in his lips that students can clearly see-WTF
Empty the dip bottles in the principle's coffee when s/he isn't looking.
Get used to it. Nepotism and favoritism exists in every company. You either like your boss and the klique or you don't. If you don't, you'd be lucky if everyone ignores you. If you are not so fortunate, they will pick on you like high school bullies for their sadistic amusement. If they treat you like garbage, look for another job. When you get a job offer and put on a new work schedule, don't tell your former boss. Just don't show up. Fuck em. You don't need your old, jerk boss and his wolfpack for a reference anyways.