Hey Pagemelt - I just want to say as someone who works within the gaming industry - that portion aroud 55:10 ish is even darker than it looks. "If you want to make a startup, then quit and make a startup" A Microsoft exec says on the heels of purchasing tons of startups, crushing their spirits, getting rid of competition for Microsoft/Xbox, and not only that but as of the last couple of months we now know that Microsoft went on to disband and get rid of many of the studios they had acquired. That message was clear as day to me: "Go try it on your own, and we'll fucking crush you"
so, i'm Malaysian. I've lived in Malaysia all of my life, and i used to work in advertising here, was a copywriter. that part about how we don't own our minds at work hit pretty hard. the most insidious part about an advertising job, besides the standard corporate culture mentioned in your vid, is this propaganda they feed us - that our work, creating pretty lies to sell products and brands, is supposed to be creatively satisfying, culturally significant, and defines the very value of our existence.
I'm Native. You've described what decolonization looks like to me. We do the work to care for our loved ones! Our community! We're only gonna make it if we care for each other
This is an absolutely incredible video, the kind of thing that you think has 500 thousand views but somehow has almost none. Your style of citing and including sources is really engaging, I hope to get to the point where I can use sources with as much talent as you do here.
I have worked both blue collar and white collar jobs, both suck in their own way but blue collar - without fail - always pushed me to a mental breaking point of crying. You body hurts, your physically exhausted, and you are stressed because all you do is work and you can’t eat regularly. Bottom line, corporate job is definitely easy in comparison but it’s not all roses either. Take this comment with a grain of salt bc variability in every job field for every person. I’m a big white dude, so I’m on easy mode in life lol
i'm 20 and have grown up with abuse and mental health problems, not to mention living life with autism and adhd, and coming out of the darkest period of my life, with finally prioritizing my mental health and feeling like I'm myself again, just to now have to shove that down the toilet to 'work', is a nightmare. To have to have a career. Turning to older people and just not understanding how they manage, asking them and getting indiscriminate answers like "oh you're just not doing the right work" or "once you find what you're 'meant to do' it'll all work out" is soul crushing. Not to mention the pick between a laborious job, which will destroy your body, or a desk job which will crush your soul is insane. How do i as a young person make this decision? how do we expect a change from the inside when, like the workers at double-fine, our ideas and thoughts have to be kept secret or else proves our disloyalty? Disability is so close to our discussions of work. I saw a little snippet of a speech that Joanna Hedva gave on disability, where they say, "Illness could be a major subject. It could be like love, war, coming of age, identity, family. It could be this thing that we understand ourselves going through as a crucible that forms us. Why then, do we keep telling ourselves that it means 1 or 2 things?". Mainly expanding on your point on disability here, but, if we could understand our body's and souls, as people who will be disabled one day, then maybe potentially we could have a better understanding of jobs which house meaning, and building structures in place which don't have to make people 'grateful' for suffering to death. ahh also great video!!
As a fellow autist with cptsd and a mystery physical disability- I would like to offer my advice as a 32 yo who was given bad advice like this as a 20 yo, and tell you what I wish I was told (and if this is not helpful feel free to ignore entirely, I don’t know you and you don’t owe me anything): If you plan on going to college, know what kind of field would work with your physical and emotional limitations. Like, if you know socializing isn’t your strength, don’t go into a field where you need to do a lot of networking. I know that sounds obvious but I went to school for photography 🤡 and I knew it was a mistake the minute I started job hunting. The good news is, even if you don’t have a degree or have a useless degree like me, there are more jobs out there for young people than they realize, mostly bc boomers are retiring and leaving a huge gap in the market. I personally had no idea what was available to me at 20. I assumed indeed.com and Craigslist were showing me everything available. They weren’t, not even close. Often you have to dig, look at org’s sites directly for listings, or know a person directly, so your application isn’t just auto deleted by AI. I think office jobs are actually great for autistic people. There is structure, repetition, and you know what’s expected of you. You can follow scripts. As long as you’re not tying your identity to it, it’s better than most other options. I think the “is this all there is?” Is just some existential dread about our potential. But I think that’s a trap. Your job isn’t who you are, and you have a whole self outside of work that can pursue art and connection and beauty in time. And if you have down time in an office job, you can read or watch TH-cam or listen to a podcast or w/e. It’s always going to be a compromise, but I think it’s worth trying to find ways to wrestle back some of your own time. The best thing for me was a friend encouraging me to apply for a civil service job. I had been working in kitchens and loved it, but my knees got fucked up and are still fucked up, so I can’t work any job that requires standing and physical labor. I was really struggling to find jobs at the time, doing a lot of phone customer service, which is fine in a pinch, but not what I would recommend. Anyways, some civil service jobs are still hybrid or full time wfh. I worked in an office I think 8 months, and then the rest of the five years I’ve worked there have been at home. County/state jobs are also very secure, ime it’s almost impossible to be fired. If helping other people means something to you, and you have the social stamina, you could get involved specifically with a local county/state benefits agency, or environmental agency, or child protections, or mental health, or the justice system. There’s a lot of civil service options if you are able to do some socializing. I’ve tried this, but now I am just in the email and access spreadsheet mines, where I feel like I belong lol. But yeah you don’t need any specialized training or prior experience, they will just take you, especially if you “understand computers” lol Other kinds of wfh office jobs would be data entry and medical billing and filing. I know autistic people who’ve flourished in those wfh environments too. The repetition is relaxing imo. And then you can get your work done fast and do whatever you want after. I will say corporate jobs can be more stressful as an autistic person than civil service jobs tho, bc some corp jobs have like weird power dynamics and expectations. Like saying you have unlimited PTO and then being mad when you use it, etc. idk I have one autistic friend who was fucked around by Morgan Stanley and another who swears Wells Fargo has her back 🤷 There are also tech wfh jobs but that field is becoming such a nuclear disaster site that I would suggest avoiding it altogether. But yeah I don’t think office jobs are soul crushing. I think office culture is soul crushing. Wfh fixes a lot that. When you’re able to work from home, at a job that isn’t customer service, and is a kind of “work at your own pace” sort of thing, your life gains some balance back. It’s been game-changing for me, and has helped with my overall agoraphobia a lot, since my interactions with people at large now are a general net-positive as opposed to when I was in the service industry and I felt like actual human garbage. This is by no means a systematic solution just like, advice from one stressed out autistic person to another, in case the status quo continues to be the status quo. I hope everything can change for the better, but if not, I still hope it works out for you.
I started watching this before bed thinking "oh neat a video essay that I'll probably fall asleep to but be able to rewatch some in the morning" I'm obviously still awake, and much like you with Elysium, i don't think I'll be able to stop thinking about your ending monologue and final quote for a long while.
i'm the type of guy who will put on nearly any video essay-style vid i see on my recommended just to have something going on in the background, and so much of it is fairly mediocre, but this video truly captured my attention. i absolutely adored your use of grabbing from so many different example sources and connecting it back to your wider point without rehashing the same thing over and over. this video doesn't have fluff and deserves its whole hour and eighteen minute runtime. absolutely delighted that i found my way to it :) i'm excited to see your future endeavors!
watching this directly after getting off work was maybe a mistake.. my brain is gonna chew on this for the rest of the day like a dog with a dangerous bit of plastic. Amazing video!
what a banger of a video, the most comprehensive and approachable, and at the same time profound essay on the hell that is work i am right now in a temporary state of just living my life being supported by a bit of savings and help of a beloved partner. for the last 3 years i was working in corporate IT, fully aware that no meaning or value is being created during these paid hours. i felt my soul and body decaying every day and i knew the cause of it. i ended up severely mentally and physically ill by this fall, and quitting working a corporate job resolved those issues in a month. i don't know how to try to approach looking for a new job again, and i know that i am blessed for having this break of having my life belong to me for a little bit I'll eventually continue working for the knife, as mitski eloquently put in her song, but i will not stop trying to save my soul and peace. i encourage everyone who is struggling to keep trying as well. we are so much bigger than our bullshit jobs or our meaningful but criminally undervalued jobs
What an absolute treat of a video, your way of constructing an argument that follows a comprehensible and chronological progression through your point and into the watchers perspective of it is an incredible talent. I love watching your other projects on patreon and I’m so happy you were able to complete this project! You’ve clearly put a lot of effort in and it really does shine through so massive kudos!
I’ve been trying to struggle with this type of overarching setting and ressentiment that builds in my own writing. This video has unblocked a few chakras and liberated some stratified bullshit. Thanks Mel!❤
Only 15 minutes in (while sitting in my soul crushing corporate job) and already so grateful the algorithm brought this video to me. What a nuanced and thoughtful approach to a terribly important topic. Can’t wait to see what the rest of the video has in store
Watching this during the 3 days i took off work to have a surgery, already dreading going back. Thanks for this great video, as someone w a corporate job i appreciate how directly you clocked the abject bullshittery of so much of it
Mel, I loved this video! I always find you so smart and thoughtful and deeply interesting to listen to and that very much continued here. I am so excited to see what you do in the future and to read/listen to/watch some of the works you mentioned here. Also, great background! I loved tracking the changes.
procrastinated going to bed for fear of work by watching this❤ jokes aside this was incredibly thoughtful, well researched and astute. definitely put into words a lot of the scary feelings I've been having as a young person starting their career!!
I feel blessed that the youtube algo recommended this to me. Such a brilliant and well put together video, how does it not have more views? Only note I would make is that people are doing things to make it better. This April Lina Khan and the FTC ruled against non competes which would make what Microsoft was talking about illegal. There are good people trying to turn this system around!
Your point about Not the Worst Cleaner *wanting* to clean particularly stands out to me. I am a handyman and I got into it because I enjoy construction and maintenance. I *like* fixing houses. I often do handiwork for my community for free or for trade. I also was a barista for about 5 years. I’m working corporate right now but I’ve always said that if handiwork or baristaing paid even marginally better, I would have been happy to do either forever because those jobs are so enjoyable and fulfilling to me. I don’t desire a lavish lifestyle but I do want to have a savings account and own a home someday… and for that it seems like you kind of have to Climb The Ladder 🙄
Thank you so much for this video essay. I needed to hear this, because the past while I've been working has felt bullshit, and all other options have felt bullshit. What you've said about doing work that 'no one wants to do' struck a real chord with me; Ironically I had the luxary of rebelling against art-school-enthusiast parents, and instead I'll be going to lawschool soon, because I genuinely enjoy the components of legal work and I find the end result fulfilling - But I'm terrified of entering a system that makes me choose between soulless evil work or overwork (ie. public defenders). I guess I just wanted to say that this video gave me a bit of hope.
im genuinely so glad thoughts like this are increasingly becoming part of our cultural imagination. thank you for doing the ~work of spreading these ideas.
I've been saying a lot of the things said in this video for years now. My "inciting incident" was getting laid off for 3 months at the start of the pandemic and just getting to live free from having to labour for a while. I was happier, healthier, I slept more, my house was tidier, I was eating better, etc. Then I was offered a job and the panic started setting in. My start date was pushed back a few weeks due to Covid so I had time to stew in the thought of going back to work. As my start date got closer and closer I started feeling more anxious about going back to work. This eventually came to a head a few days before my start date when I had my first full blown panic attack about it. I was hyper aware of what working full time looks and feels like because I'd spent the last 10 years working full time before this. I suddenly felt, deep in my core, the existential dread of having to live like that again. Just 5 days on, 2 days off, 5 days on, 2 days off, 5 days on, 2 days off..... the cycle repeating every week, likely until I'm dead because retirement is a pipe dream. Except unlike the last 10 years I now KNEW for a fact how much better life is when I'm free of this cycle, and that makes this so much worse. I tried to figure a way out of this, desperately trying to find some justification for not having to return to work, I was manic, but there was no escape from it. I had to go back. I cried myself to sleep the night before my first day while trying not to scream, my partner at the time consoling me as I did so. I woke up, suppressed my emotions as best I could for the day, and kind of disassociated my way through it to be honest. I don't really remember the time at work that day. What I do remember is getting in my car, driving a few blocks, turning into a relatively empty parking lot, parking in the back, and just fucking BALLING. Just tears, and snot, and screaming, and holding myself back from breaking things in my car due to all of the hate, fear, anxiety, helplessness, exhaustion, anger, and frustration I'd been holding in all day bubbling to the surface. To this day I'm not sure I've ever had a more powerful outburst of negative emotion than what I let out that day in my car after my first day back to working full time. I had another panic attack that evening, and the following day, and eventually they became less frequent as I got back into the routine of working and my doctor and I found a good dosage of the medications I now take for anxiety, ADHD, and depression. I'd love to say that things are better now, but they aren't, I'm just more used to feeling miserable about it again. Every day I spend at work I just can't help but think about the fact that I'm forced to give up the majority of my waking hours, on the vast majority of my days, for the vast majority of my years, to labouring. I have to spend most of my days somewhere I don't want to be, doing things I don't want to do, for people I don't even like, surrounded by people I only associate with due to proximity, while my life continues to tick on by day after day, just so I can afford to eat food and live indoors. This isn't living. I spend more days longing to live than I do actually getting to do it. Things don't have to be like this, they shouldn't be like this, we all deserve better.
you've perfectly encapsulated how i've felt ever since starting my first "big kid" job after graduating college, how i've grown to hate the clock and calendars, marking when my time is up, and their time begins
Hi, Pagemelt! Like many others, I clicked on this video due to it's length and strong indication of it being a video essay. I can certainly say you've absolutely nailed it in terms of presentation, source material and eloquent rhetoric. This is an absolutely wonderful piece of work and you should be very proud of what you've created. On less fun stuff, I completely agree with everything you've presented and mentioned throughout - I think the rise of a cultural epoch that heavily ties identity to work is mega-depressing and soul crushing. The questions you've asked at the end of the video are also very thought provoking. I totally agree that everyone does indeed want to do work, even the less 'desirable' jobs (think of Perfect Days directed by Wim Wenders) but the ultimate cultural norm of people entirely relying on what can only be described as wage serfdom simply causes more harm than good. Crazy good video, well done. PS. you totally remind me Tim Rogers from Action Button and I think you would immensely enjoy his gargantuan and ever-introspective game reviews.
wow i'm just loving all of this. the first video essay that's connected with me in a long time. loving the more austere, relaxed lecture style with more minimal editing. phenomenal work.
i mean this as high praise and appreciation i love how ur hand gestures are reminiscent of hank green :3 loved the video thanks for sharing the well thought out ideas! will definitely be sharing this with my friends
Hello fellow software person (I used to be on the development side, and you're on the design side, wow I admire people who make things useful and beautiful!!!) Anyways, this video is eye opening. I still don't think my job is bullsh** but you made me question it, and that's something! I'm happy your video got recommended, looking forward to seeing your other stuff!
If you haven't yet, you MUST read the Dispossessed by Ursula K Leguin! The exploration of work/labour without capitalism genuinely changed how I thought about work (also a great partner read with Bullshit Jobs tbh)
spectacular video. thank you for sharing it. I also wanted to add, on the topic of "meaningful work" and the way a full-time do-it-or-die working culture will erode that meaning away - I previously worked as a nurse providing abortion care through the pandemic and the overturn of Roe v. Wade. It was, without a shadow of a doubt, the most meaningful work I've ever done and could ever hope to do. I moved from that into family social work. What I learned is that it is profoundly easy for important, community serving work to be exploited. I've seen it ever since in my work as a nurse and it has consistently made me so catastrophically pessimistic about our ability to care and provide for one another under capitalism that I almost checked myself into voluntary inpatient care after quitting my last job. When work has real meaning, real value, when it is genuinely imperative to the community, that human need for care and meaning becomes a gun to your head. It doesn't matter how abusive or exploitative the employer, how dangerous the working conditions, how brutalizing the schedule, how unforgiving the working culture. If you don't do the work, these people don't get care. It turns valuable work into a game of chicken with employers who want to see how far your compassion for the people you serve will stretch before it breaks, or you die.
This was such a deeply enjoyable watch. Thank you for making this video, Mel! I took breaks from it to complete care work this evening and loved being able to let the ideas marinate a little before going back in for more.
37:50 "i was having a meeting about a meeting" i felt it in my bones...i hate all meetings as most of them could be emails, but these specific b*llshit ones are SOUL CRUSHING!
@@pagemeltI had a similar sort of thing happen to me a few years ago. I worked for a video game company, and when I was hired I had to sign something that basically asked me to list out any intellectual property ideas I had, and then had verbiage afterward I was supposed to sign in agreement to that said something like the things I’d listed above was an exhaustive list of all my ideas, so any ideas I hadn’t listed for the duration that I worked for the company were created for the company and belonged to them. It was written in a very loose way that implied all IPs, not just video game IPs. It made me extremely uncomfortable so I refused to sign it as-is. Thankfully they didn’t push me on it.
gamedev here that went AAA to indie, the double fine segment is terrifying. Thankfully my company was chill with me working on stuff on the side but the fear of our small studio getting acquired and completely changing was so real and yet something employees had pretty much no say in.
The capital i Insight! Love it. I'm from Australia btw Just a thought - being a researcher in a lab, kind of corporate environment but also definitely setting your own agenda but also depending on inconsistent funding but also some claim to doing universal good. Also like diy raves and anarchist community art space squat things, there's a glimmer of life as play in the modern world. Anyway tysm this helped me clean the whole house and i learned much with many thoughts provoked 👍
01:06:20 My answer to this has been something along the lines of, 'we literally have drones and robots to do that now; it's just that under the current structures of capitalism there is no incentive for the corporate oligarchs to invest money in the R&D of what would disrupt the current exploitation practices.' Contemporary methods imply either the system itself must fail or a large enough number of its components (people) 'fail' (revolt or d!e), that the system can no longer function before other methods are adopted. In other words it's the corporate version of, 'If it aint broke, don't fix it'; and even if the people are economically 'broke', from the 35,000 ft. perspective their minds and bodies haven't yet. A part of me feels like the insidious mind melting parasite that is Capitalism not only replaces thousands of years of evolutionarily developed instinctual incentives for things like food, shelter, belonging, actualization with an insatiable desire for more of the monie$ in those most successful in that system. 'Line go up' mentality, whoever is buried with the most amount of it wins type sh!t. But it also has the component of malice by intent, not just the 'pulling the ladder up behind you' but a conscious cognitive dissonance to the effects of their respective industries on people and planet both. How can any of these individuals claim that they care about or have the respect of their own grandchildren's futures; let alone their children who could be old enough to have already had those gran-babies; when they are actively propagating industries that are eviscerating the planet, and leave their employees utterly broke; in mind, body, soul, and bank account. I truly think this is one of the most cosmically destructive mind viruses next to modern organized religion. Which is like mostly harmless now, except for the Scientologists but that one doesn't really count; Morman's have a better claim to the religion status than those weirdos. Oh, and of course the Catholics; sorry not sorry, y'all know what I'm talkin' 'bout; check in when you've cleaned that filthy room you soiled. To close this ramble, that I'll admit began to suffer from some mental scope-creep towards the end, of the video; yes, I'm still typing and the video is over now, and I need to pee so: The future is defined and will be destroyed by memes; dank a$$ memes.
This video is haunting .. I personally experienced only wanting to go into my corp job to get paid. I have turned down multiple offers to be promoted with various excuses only to later have to accept them because it was all but stated, accept it or leave. The life dread that comes from the additional hours and responsibilities with only slightly higher pay is wild. And others expect me to be not only happy and excited but thankful... It makes me want to vomit lol
"And so you're asking me, who does the dishes after the revolution? Well, I do my own dishes now, I'll do my own dishes then You know it's always the ones who don't who ask that fucking question" -Wingnut Dishwashers Union song 'Jesus does the dishes' People have difficulty thinking of work and labor they will do because of the intrinsic joy of doing it, the fulfillment of goal and the final result of its completion. I used to think of work as this sort of cosmic obligation that must be done but, now I view it as the work I do because it aligns with my values and thats made all the difference.
Please tell me you’ve seen severance. It’s such an incredible depiction of the emotional labor that goes into work and the horrifying way we have to separate our personalities to work
Awesome work! I just discovered you via this video that popped up in my feed. Keep up the awesome work! I'll subscribe to your newsletter and channel, and leave a like and comment to hopefully boost any chance of someone randomly bumping into your work (like I did!)
this was so well researched and clearly articulated, thank you! i'd be curious to hear more people delving into the notion of bullshit jobs now that wfh is pretty commonplace. does the same soul-sucking awareness that you're not contributing anything meaningful still factor into people's psyche's, and if so, is it mitigated by the 'freedom' of being within their home environment?
Interesting to hear David Graeber described as an anthropologist. I've always known him as an anarchist. I'm not using that as an insult, I'm probably anarchist myself. We all contain multitudes, I suppose Graeber's had to include a day job. Love your Crimethinc poster btw, I have the same one. Might be worth watching Severance. It's a sort of psychological thriller about totally cutting off a person's work life from their personal life. Idiocracy from Mike Judge (since you're a fan of his other work) is also relevant. Also maybe The Culture by Iain M Banks, for a positive take on post-scarcity work?
At first when I was watching this video I got through the first few minutes and it felt really discordant, like you were just giving me some recommendations of anti-work media. But they kinda kept hitting on something, and I kept listening, and eventually I felt like I was getting punched in the gut over and over again. I don't have a job so I can't give you any patreon money but thanks for making this
hell yeah!! Amazing job as always. I wonder if you're familiar with Ordinary Men by Christopher Browning? I haven't read it (yet) but if my chronically offline fiance watched this video, he'd recommend it based on that section where you talk about Lakewood, about the mundanely awful things people do because they are told. Everyone who commits a heinous act is an "ordinary man" at the end of the day.
Oh man. I'm at a corporate job now (test engineer, so my job is only as valuable as the project I'm on (usually not very, society-vise)) and it's honestly a fucking joke. :D Also it is EXACTLY like Severance. The show is amazing. (it's sci-fi but emotionally pretty much everything that has happened in it happens every day)
As a decidedly a not-an-expert on literature or art history, I really appreciated your connections between the works you’ve studied and the modern conversation on the various toks. You watched tiktoks so that I don’t have to so thank you. I find the perspectives of young people 6 months into their 9-to-5s vastly interesting and sobering. It’s like swimming in an icey lake, seeing some else jump in, hearing them scream about the cold and telling them we got used to it. Then they ask us “why not just get out of the water?” To offer some constructive criticism: this was a long piece. I get the impression that’s intentional so it’s not necessarily a problem. But I’ll caution against throwing this much writing in early videos if it leads to writers block later. You’ll find yourself going “well I talked about that in video A earlier.” Video essays are a game of snake like that. For your own longevity and to avoid overworking (😅) your writing muscles, try to leave a few topics or points for your future self to write about.
Hey Pagemelt - I just want to say as someone who works within the gaming industry - that portion aroud 55:10 ish is even darker than it looks.
"If you want to make a startup, then quit and make a startup"
A Microsoft exec says on the heels of purchasing tons of startups, crushing their spirits, getting rid of competition for Microsoft/Xbox, and not only that but as of the last couple of months we now know that Microsoft went on to disband and get rid of many of the studios they had acquired.
That message was clear as day to me: "Go try it on your own, and we'll fucking crush you"
so, i'm Malaysian. I've lived in Malaysia all of my life, and i used to work in advertising here, was a copywriter. that part about how we don't own our minds at work hit pretty hard.
the most insidious part about an advertising job, besides the standard corporate culture mentioned in your vid, is this propaganda they feed us - that our work, creating pretty lies to sell products and brands, is supposed to be creatively satisfying, culturally significant, and defines the very value of our existence.
I'm Native. You've described what decolonization looks like to me. We do the work to care for our loved ones! Our community! We're only gonna make it if we care for each other
This is an absolutely incredible video, the kind of thing that you think has 500 thousand views but somehow has almost none. Your style of citing and including sources is really engaging, I hope to get to the point where I can use sources with as much talent as you do here.
I have worked both blue collar and white collar jobs, both suck in their own way but blue collar - without fail - always pushed me to a mental breaking point of crying. You body hurts, your physically exhausted, and you are stressed because all you do is work and you can’t eat regularly. Bottom line, corporate job is definitely easy in comparison but it’s not all roses either. Take this comment with a grain of salt bc variability in every job field for every person. I’m a big white dude, so I’m on easy mode in life lol
This video kicks ass - best use of the TH-cam algorithm to serve this to me
This is going to have me thinking and yapping for days.
i'm 20 and have grown up with abuse and mental health problems, not to mention living life with autism and adhd, and coming out of the darkest period of my life, with finally prioritizing my mental health and feeling like I'm myself again, just to now have to shove that down the toilet to 'work', is a nightmare. To have to have a career. Turning to older people and just not understanding how they manage, asking them and getting indiscriminate answers like "oh you're just not doing the right work" or "once you find what you're 'meant to do' it'll all work out" is soul crushing. Not to mention the pick between a laborious job, which will destroy your body, or a desk job which will crush your soul is insane. How do i as a young person make this decision? how do we expect a change from the inside when, like the workers at double-fine, our ideas and thoughts have to be kept secret or else proves our disloyalty?
Disability is so close to our discussions of work. I saw a little snippet of a speech that Joanna Hedva gave on disability, where they say, "Illness could be a major subject. It could be like love, war, coming of age, identity, family. It could be this thing that we understand ourselves going through as a crucible that forms us. Why then, do we keep telling ourselves that it means 1 or 2 things?".
Mainly expanding on your point on disability here, but, if we could understand our body's and souls, as people who will be disabled one day, then maybe potentially we could have a better understanding of jobs which house meaning, and building structures in place which don't have to make people 'grateful' for suffering to death.
ahh also great video!!
As a fellow autist with cptsd and a mystery physical disability- I would like to offer my advice as a 32 yo who was given bad advice like this as a 20 yo, and tell you what I wish I was told (and if this is not helpful feel free to ignore entirely, I don’t know you and you don’t owe me anything):
If you plan on going to college, know what kind of field would work with your physical and emotional limitations. Like, if you know socializing isn’t your strength, don’t go into a field where you need to do a lot of networking. I know that sounds obvious but I went to school for photography 🤡 and I knew it was a mistake the minute I started job hunting.
The good news is, even if you don’t have a degree or have a useless degree like me, there are more jobs out there for young people than they realize, mostly bc boomers are retiring and leaving a huge gap in the market. I personally had no idea what was available to me at 20. I assumed indeed.com and Craigslist were showing me everything available. They weren’t, not even close. Often you have to dig, look at org’s sites directly for listings, or know a person directly, so your application isn’t just auto deleted by AI.
I think office jobs are actually great for autistic people. There is structure, repetition, and you know what’s expected of you. You can follow scripts. As long as you’re not tying your identity to it, it’s better than most other options. I think the “is this all there is?” Is just some existential dread about our potential. But I think that’s a trap. Your job isn’t who you are, and you have a whole self outside of work that can pursue art and connection and beauty in time. And if you have down time in an office job, you can read or watch TH-cam or listen to a podcast or w/e. It’s always going to be a compromise, but I think it’s worth trying to find ways to wrestle back some of your own time.
The best thing for me was a friend encouraging me to apply for a civil service job. I had been working in kitchens and loved it, but my knees got fucked up and are still fucked up, so I can’t work any job that requires standing and physical labor. I was really struggling to find jobs at the time, doing a lot of phone customer service, which is fine in a pinch, but not what I would recommend.
Anyways, some civil service jobs are still hybrid or full time wfh. I worked in an office I think 8 months, and then the rest of the five years I’ve worked there have been at home. County/state jobs are also very secure, ime it’s almost impossible to be fired. If helping other people means something to you, and you have the social stamina, you could get involved specifically with a local county/state benefits agency, or environmental agency, or child protections, or mental health, or the justice system. There’s a lot of civil service options if you are able to do some socializing. I’ve tried this, but now I am just in the email and access spreadsheet mines, where I feel like I belong lol. But yeah you don’t need any specialized training or prior experience, they will just take you, especially if you “understand computers” lol
Other kinds of wfh office jobs would be data entry and medical billing and filing. I know autistic people who’ve flourished in those wfh environments too. The repetition is relaxing imo. And then you can get your work done fast and do whatever you want after.
I will say corporate jobs can be more stressful as an autistic person than civil service jobs tho, bc some corp jobs have like weird power dynamics and expectations. Like saying you have unlimited PTO and then being mad when you use it, etc. idk I have one autistic friend who was fucked around by Morgan Stanley and another who swears Wells Fargo has her back 🤷
There are also tech wfh jobs but that field is becoming such a nuclear disaster site that I would suggest avoiding it altogether.
But yeah I don’t think office jobs are soul crushing. I think office culture is soul crushing. Wfh fixes a lot that.
When you’re able to work from home, at a job that isn’t customer service, and is a kind of “work at your own pace” sort of thing, your life gains some balance back. It’s been game-changing for me, and has helped with my overall agoraphobia a lot, since my interactions with people at large now are a general net-positive as opposed to when I was in the service industry and I felt like actual human garbage.
This is by no means a systematic solution just like, advice from one stressed out autistic person to another, in case the status quo continues to be the status quo. I hope everything can change for the better, but if not, I still hope it works out for you.
@@EnduringHarmony Thank you as a disabled person who is in the process of getting work, you have given me hope. Thank you🙂
I started watching this before bed thinking "oh neat a video essay that I'll probably fall asleep to but be able to rewatch some in the morning"
I'm obviously still awake, and much like you with Elysium, i don't think I'll be able to stop thinking about your ending monologue and final quote for a long while.
I'm glued to the screen--I'm so proud of you!
aw shucks, thanks darlin
This is incredible, the end made me honestly well up with hope and tears. “Well I will” is very special and something I wish our society has more of.
i'm the type of guy who will put on nearly any video essay-style vid i see on my recommended just to have something going on in the background, and so much of it is fairly mediocre, but this video truly captured my attention. i absolutely adored your use of grabbing from so many different example sources and connecting it back to your wider point without rehashing the same thing over and over. this video doesn't have fluff and deserves its whole hour and eighteen minute runtime. absolutely delighted that i found my way to it :) i'm excited to see your future endeavors!
When i learned Elysium was made by the District 9 guy, that was the first time in my life i realized “oh, directors can fall off”
LET'S GO BOYS I'M SETTLIN IN
watching this directly after getting off work was maybe a mistake.. my brain is gonna chew on this for the rest of the day like a dog with a dangerous bit of plastic. Amazing video!
what a banger of a video, the most comprehensive and approachable, and at the same time profound essay on the hell that is work
i am right now in a temporary state of just living my life being supported by a bit of savings and help of a beloved partner. for the last 3 years i was working in corporate IT, fully aware that no meaning or value is being created during these paid hours. i felt my soul and body decaying every day and i knew the cause of it. i ended up severely mentally and physically ill by this fall, and quitting working a corporate job resolved those issues in a month.
i don't know how to try to approach looking for a new job again, and i know that i am blessed for having this break of having my life belong to me for a little bit
I'll eventually continue working for the knife, as mitski eloquently put in her song, but i will not stop trying to save my soul and peace. i encourage everyone who is struggling to keep trying as well. we are so much bigger than our bullshit jobs or our meaningful but criminally undervalued jobs
What an absolute treat of a video, your way of constructing an argument that follows a comprehensible and chronological progression through your point and into the watchers perspective of it is an incredible talent. I love watching your other projects on patreon and I’m so happy you were able to complete this project! You’ve clearly put a lot of effort in and it really does shine through so massive kudos!
I’ve been trying to struggle with this type of overarching setting and ressentiment that builds in my own writing. This video has unblocked a few chakras and liberated some stratified bullshit. Thanks Mel!❤
Only 15 minutes in (while sitting in my soul crushing corporate job) and already so grateful the algorithm brought this video to me. What a nuanced and thoughtful approach to a terribly important topic. Can’t wait to see what the rest of the video has in store
Huge news! I'm very excited!
Watching this during the 3 days i took off work to have a surgery, already dreading going back. Thanks for this great video, as someone w a corporate job i appreciate how directly you clocked the abject bullshittery of so much of it
Mel, I loved this video! I always find you so smart and thoughtful and deeply interesting to listen to and that very much continued here. I am so excited to see what you do in the future and to read/listen to/watch some of the works you mentioned here. Also, great background! I loved tracking the changes.
@@EbayleyA thank you so much friend ♥️♥️
this was amazing, sharing with many friends now !!!!!
and gosh, what a rich reference list!! excited to dig into your footnotes
procrastinated going to bed for fear of work by watching this❤ jokes aside this was incredibly thoughtful, well researched and astute. definitely put into words a lot of the scary feelings I've been having as a young person starting their career!!
I feel blessed that the youtube algo recommended this to me. Such a brilliant and well put together video, how does it not have more views?
Only note I would make is that people are doing things to make it better. This April Lina Khan and the FTC ruled against non competes which would make what Microsoft was talking about illegal. There are good people trying to turn this system around!
This was amazing!! I’m so proud all the work you’ve done!
This was a great video and I'm really glad that it was suggested to me
Your point about Not the Worst Cleaner *wanting* to clean particularly stands out to me. I am a handyman and I got into it because I enjoy construction and maintenance. I *like* fixing houses. I often do handiwork for my community for free or for trade. I also was a barista for about 5 years. I’m working corporate right now but I’ve always said that if handiwork or baristaing paid even marginally better, I would have been happy to do either forever because those jobs are so enjoyable and fulfilling to me. I don’t desire a lavish lifestyle but I do want to have a savings account and own a home someday… and for that it seems like you kind of have to Climb The Ladder 🙄
Watched all in one sitting. Moved me to tears.
Thank you so much for this video essay. I needed to hear this, because the past while I've been working has felt bullshit, and all other options have felt bullshit.
What you've said about doing work that 'no one wants to do' struck a real chord with me; Ironically I had the luxary of rebelling against art-school-enthusiast parents, and instead I'll be going to lawschool soon, because I genuinely enjoy the components of legal work and I find the end result fulfilling - But I'm terrified of entering a system that makes me choose between soulless evil work or overwork (ie. public defenders). I guess I just wanted to say that this video gave me a bit of hope.
super excited for this!!
im genuinely so glad thoughts like this are increasingly becoming part of our cultural imagination. thank you for doing the ~work of spreading these ideas.
aaah thank you for posting on TH-cam again and on this topic!!!
I've been saying a lot of the things said in this video for years now. My "inciting incident" was getting laid off for 3 months at the start of the pandemic and just getting to live free from having to labour for a while. I was happier, healthier, I slept more, my house was tidier, I was eating better, etc.
Then I was offered a job and the panic started setting in. My start date was pushed back a few weeks due to Covid so I had time to stew in the thought of going back to work. As my start date got closer and closer I started feeling more anxious about going back to work. This eventually came to a head a few days before my start date when I had my first full blown panic attack about it. I was hyper aware of what working full time looks and feels like because I'd spent the last 10 years working full time before this. I suddenly felt, deep in my core, the existential dread of having to live like that again.
Just 5 days on, 2 days off, 5 days on, 2 days off, 5 days on, 2 days off..... the cycle repeating every week, likely until I'm dead because retirement is a pipe dream. Except unlike the last 10 years I now KNEW for a fact how much better life is when I'm free of this cycle, and that makes this so much worse.
I tried to figure a way out of this, desperately trying to find some justification for not having to return to work, I was manic, but there was no escape from it. I had to go back. I cried myself to sleep the night before my first day while trying not to scream, my partner at the time consoling me as I did so.
I woke up, suppressed my emotions as best I could for the day, and kind of disassociated my way through it to be honest. I don't really remember the time at work that day. What I do remember is getting in my car, driving a few blocks, turning into a relatively empty parking lot, parking in the back, and just fucking BALLING.
Just tears, and snot, and screaming, and holding myself back from breaking things in my car due to all of the hate, fear, anxiety, helplessness, exhaustion, anger, and frustration I'd been holding in all day bubbling to the surface. To this day I'm not sure I've ever had a more powerful outburst of negative emotion than what I let out that day in my car after my first day back to working full time. I had another panic attack that evening, and the following day, and eventually they became less frequent as I got back into the routine of working and my doctor and I found a good dosage of the medications I now take for anxiety, ADHD, and depression.
I'd love to say that things are better now, but they aren't, I'm just more used to feeling miserable about it again. Every day I spend at work I just can't help but think about the fact that I'm forced to give up the majority of my waking hours, on the vast majority of my days, for the vast majority of my years, to labouring. I have to spend most of my days somewhere I don't want to be, doing things I don't want to do, for people I don't even like, surrounded by people I only associate with due to proximity, while my life continues to tick on by day after day, just so I can afford to eat food and live indoors.
This isn't living. I spend more days longing to live than I do actually getting to do it. Things don't have to be like this, they shouldn't be like this, we all deserve better.
you've perfectly encapsulated how i've felt ever since starting my first "big kid" job after graduating college, how i've grown to hate the clock and calendars, marking when my time is up, and their time begins
this was great! i foresee this channel going places, please keep at it!
100/10!!! Love your content of any length and happy to report long form is truly delightful. Excited for whats to come!
Really well made video. I think this is going to be one of those essays that i keep coming back to. Cant wait to check out the rest of your channel
Amazing video, you’ve put so many thoughts I didn’t know I had into words!!! Now I desperately want to re-read Bullshit Jobs!
This was mwaaah, thank you for your art and effort and perspective
Hi, Pagemelt! Like many others, I clicked on this video due to it's length and strong indication of it being a video essay. I can certainly say you've absolutely nailed it in terms of presentation, source material and eloquent rhetoric. This is an absolutely wonderful piece of work and you should be very proud of what you've created.
On less fun stuff, I completely agree with everything you've presented and mentioned throughout - I think the rise of a cultural epoch that heavily ties identity to work is mega-depressing and soul crushing. The questions you've asked at the end of the video are also very thought provoking. I totally agree that everyone does indeed want to do work, even the less 'desirable' jobs (think of Perfect Days directed by Wim Wenders) but the ultimate cultural norm of people entirely relying on what can only be described as wage serfdom simply causes more harm than good.
Crazy good video, well done.
PS. you totally remind me Tim Rogers from Action Button and I think you would immensely enjoy his gargantuan and ever-introspective game reviews.
haven't finished the video yet but i would love to hear you talk about anomalisa. feel like you'd maybe expand my mind prism with that one.
wow i'm just loving all of this. the first video essay that's connected with me in a long time. loving the more austere, relaxed lecture style with more minimal editing. phenomenal work.
THE HEART IS A LONELY HUNTER MENTIONED 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️
i mean this as high praise and appreciation i love how ur hand gestures are reminiscent of hank green :3 loved the video thanks for sharing the well thought out ideas! will definitely be sharing this with my friends
Hello fellow software person (I used to be on the development side, and you're on the design side, wow I admire people who make things useful and beautiful!!!)
Anyways, this video is eye opening. I still don't think my job is bullsh** but you made me question it, and that's something!
I'm happy your video got recommended, looking forward to seeing your other stuff!
If you haven't yet, you MUST read the Dispossessed by Ursula K Leguin! The exploration of work/labour without capitalism genuinely changed how I thought about work (also a great partner read with Bullshit Jobs tbh)
Amazing break down you’re so articulate!
spectacular video. thank you for sharing it.
I also wanted to add, on the topic of "meaningful work" and the way a full-time do-it-or-die working culture will erode that meaning away - I previously worked as a nurse providing abortion care through the pandemic and the overturn of Roe v. Wade. It was, without a shadow of a doubt, the most meaningful work I've ever done and could ever hope to do. I moved from that into family social work.
What I learned is that it is profoundly easy for important, community serving work to be exploited. I've seen it ever since in my work as a nurse and it has consistently made me so catastrophically pessimistic about our ability to care and provide for one another under capitalism that I almost checked myself into voluntary inpatient care after quitting my last job. When work has real meaning, real value, when it is genuinely imperative to the community, that human need for care and meaning becomes a gun to your head.
It doesn't matter how abusive or exploitative the employer, how dangerous the working conditions, how brutalizing the schedule, how unforgiving the working culture. If you don't do the work, these people don't get care. It turns valuable work into a game of chicken with employers who want to see how far your compassion for the people you serve will stretch before it breaks, or you die.
watching this at work
This showed up on my feed and now I'm a subscriber. You're so insightful! Thank you so much for making this.
this is magnificent. loved every minute.
This was such a deeply enjoyable watch. Thank you for making this video, Mel! I took breaks from it to complete care work this evening and loved being able to let the ideas marinate a little before going back in for more.
Haunting, ominous, and hitting all too true. Thank you for the discussion and I hope for a better world soon
37:50 "i was having a meeting about a meeting" i felt it in my bones...i hate all meetings as most of them could be emails, but these specific b*llshit ones are SOUL CRUSHING!
Hey! I know you from tiktok. I left the app, so I'm glad the homepage recommended your video to me. Subscribed!
Random drop after 2 years goes crazy. I used check weekly if u had any new videos after i watched the captive prince one
I’m excited to be incredibly sad, the Elysium hook is 100/10
The Doublefine stuff is so terrifying and dystopian for me.
yeah this was the only part of the video that affected me so much during editing i had to take a BREAK
@@pagemeltI had a similar sort of thing happen to me a few years ago. I worked for a video game company, and when I was hired I had to sign something that basically asked me to list out any intellectual property ideas I had, and then had verbiage afterward I was supposed to sign in agreement to that said something like the things I’d listed above was an exhaustive list of all my ideas, so any ideas I hadn’t listed for the duration that I worked for the company were created for the company and belonged to them. It was written in a very loose way that implied all IPs, not just video game IPs. It made me extremely uncomfortable so I refused to sign it as-is. Thankfully they didn’t push me on it.
This was really an insightful video. Subscribed.
gamedev here that went AAA to indie, the double fine segment is terrifying. Thankfully my company was chill with me working on stuff on the side but the fear of our small studio getting acquired and completely changing was so real and yet something employees had pretty much no say in.
Thank you for making this. Great video
you’ve gained a subscriber. good work here
Thank you for this video!!!!!!
i love this
The capital i Insight! Love it. I'm from Australia btw
Just a thought - being a researcher in a lab, kind of corporate environment but also definitely setting your own agenda but also depending on inconsistent funding but also some claim to doing universal good.
Also like diy raves and anarchist community art space squat things, there's a glimmer of life as play in the modern world. Anyway tysm this helped me clean the whole house and i learned much with many thoughts provoked 👍
Great video, subbed ~
Amazing video, thank you for making it 😃
oops thats the best video essay this year thanks dood
.... Shaq? in the background? I love it here
this popped up in my recommended, just subbed
01:06:20 My answer to this has been something along the lines of, 'we literally have drones and robots to do that now; it's just that under the current structures of capitalism there is no incentive for the corporate oligarchs to invest money in the R&D of what would disrupt the current exploitation practices.'
Contemporary methods imply either the system itself must fail or a large enough number of its components (people) 'fail' (revolt or d!e), that the system can no longer function before other methods are adopted. In other words it's the corporate version of, 'If it aint broke, don't fix it'; and even if the people are economically 'broke', from the 35,000 ft. perspective their minds and bodies haven't yet.
A part of me feels like the insidious mind melting parasite that is Capitalism not only replaces thousands of years of evolutionarily developed instinctual incentives for things like food, shelter, belonging, actualization with an insatiable desire for more of the monie$ in those most successful in that system. 'Line go up' mentality, whoever is buried with the most amount of it wins type sh!t. But it also has the component of malice by intent, not just the 'pulling the ladder up behind you' but a conscious cognitive dissonance to the effects of their respective industries on people and planet both.
How can any of these individuals claim that they care about or have the respect of their own grandchildren's futures; let alone their children who could be old enough to have already had those gran-babies; when they are actively propagating industries that are eviscerating the planet, and leave their employees utterly broke; in mind, body, soul, and bank account. I truly think this is one of the most cosmically destructive mind viruses next to modern organized religion. Which is like mostly harmless now, except for the Scientologists but that one doesn't really count; Morman's have a better claim to the religion status than those weirdos. Oh, and of course the Catholics; sorry not sorry, y'all know what I'm talkin' 'bout; check in when you've cleaned that filthy room you soiled.
To close this ramble, that I'll admit began to suffer from some mental scope-creep towards the end, of the video; yes, I'm still typing and the video is over now, and I need to pee so:
The future is defined and will be destroyed by memes; dank a$$ memes.
aaaah, i can't wait :)
This is really great so far. I am curious about your Bad Brains t shirt. It seems very cool
Does anyone know how might I procure the capitalism posture?
I wish I had a bullshit job. That sounds way better than being overworked to death for nothing.
This video is haunting .. I personally experienced only wanting to go into my corp job to get paid. I have turned down multiple offers to be promoted with various excuses only to later have to accept them because it was all but stated, accept it or leave. The life dread that comes from the additional hours and responsibilities with only slightly higher pay is wild. And others expect me to be not only happy and excited but thankful... It makes me want to vomit lol
"And so you're asking me, who does the dishes after the revolution?
Well, I do my own dishes now, I'll do my own dishes then
You know it's always the ones who don't who ask that fucking question" -Wingnut Dishwashers Union song 'Jesus does the dishes'
People have difficulty thinking of work and labor they will do because of the intrinsic joy of doing it, the fulfillment of goal and the final result of its completion. I used to think of work as this sort of cosmic obligation that must be done but, now I view it as the work I do because it aligns with my values and thats made all the difference.
9:42 I was today years old when i found out this was a Zizek Jamesson quote and not a Fisher quote
genuinely one of the best videos ive watched on here recently, so glad this turned up on my fyp ^_^
im so seated
Please tell me you’ve seen severance. It’s such an incredible depiction of the emotional labor that goes into work and the horrifying way we have to separate our personalities to work
Awesome work! I just discovered you via this video that popped up in my feed. Keep up the awesome work! I'll subscribe to your newsletter and channel, and leave a like and comment to hopefully boost any chance of someone randomly bumping into your work (like I did!)
losing my mind over "what i learned over two years at mckinsey" 💀
this was so well researched and clearly articulated, thank you! i'd be curious to hear more people delving into the notion of bullshit jobs now that wfh is pretty commonplace. does the same soul-sucking awareness that you're not contributing anything meaningful still factor into people's psyche's, and if so, is it mitigated by the 'freedom' of being within their home environment?
really good video. thank you
Interesting to hear David Graeber described as an anthropologist. I've always known him as an anarchist. I'm not using that as an insult, I'm probably anarchist myself. We all contain multitudes, I suppose Graeber's had to include a day job. Love your Crimethinc poster btw, I have the same one.
Might be worth watching Severance. It's a sort of psychological thriller about totally cutting off a person's work life from their personal life. Idiocracy from Mike Judge (since you're a fan of his other work) is also relevant. Also maybe The Culture by Iain M Banks, for a positive take on post-scarcity work?
He was an anarchist politically, but he was an anthropologist professionally! He arrived at anarchism by way of anthropology.
Algorithm popped off with this one, great video!
At first when I was watching this video I got through the first few minutes and it felt really discordant, like you were just giving me some recommendations of anti-work media. But they kinda kept hitting on something, and I kept listening, and eventually I felt like I was getting punched in the gut over and over again. I don't have a job so I can't give you any patreon money but thanks for making this
Sick vid dood
Excellent video, especially great watching this at my own personal bullshit job :^)
hell yeah!! Amazing job as always. I wonder if you're familiar with Ordinary Men by Christopher Browning? I haven't read it (yet) but if my chronically offline fiance watched this video, he'd recommend it based on that section where you talk about Lakewood, about the mundanely awful things people do because they are told. Everyone who commits a heinous act is an "ordinary man" at the end of the day.
Oh man. I'm at a corporate job now (test engineer, so my job is only as valuable as the project I'm on (usually not very, society-vise)) and it's honestly a fucking joke. :D
Also it is EXACTLY like Severance. The show is amazing. (it's sci-fi but emotionally pretty much everything that has happened in it happens every day)
I'm writing a queer crip scifi novel about alternative economies and how making and doing things happens without jobs! I'd love to send it to you.
algorithm boost comment
This boy should be in Jr. High, not working fr fr
As a decidedly a not-an-expert on literature or art history, I really appreciated your connections between the works you’ve studied and the modern conversation on the various toks. You watched tiktoks so that I don’t have to so thank you. I find the perspectives of young people 6 months into their 9-to-5s vastly interesting and sobering. It’s like swimming in an icey lake, seeing some else jump in, hearing them scream about the cold and telling them we got used to it. Then they ask us “why not just get out of the water?”
To offer some constructive criticism: this was a long piece. I get the impression that’s intentional so it’s not necessarily a problem. But I’ll caution against throwing this much writing in early videos if it leads to writers block later. You’ll find yourself going “well I talked about that in video A earlier.” Video essays are a game of snake like that. For your own longevity and to avoid overworking (😅) your writing muscles, try to leave a few topics or points for your future self to write about.