hookup culture
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 เม.ย. 2024
- my thoughts + why i no longer participate in it
an open & honest chat on hookup culture & my opinions on how it's effecting our generation & women especially. i'm not super religious nor is this video coming from a place of judgement - in this video i'm sharing everything i wish i could go back in time & tell my younger self in case it can help at least one person.
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We’ve been sold a lie and I been saying this forever. Women (for the most part) do not benefit from hook up culture and I think we really need to start being honest with ourselves. There is nothing liberating about allowing anyone and everyone to have access to you. I used to think it wasn’t that big of a deal but the older I’ve gotten along with my experiences I’ve realized how important it is to protect my energy because there are many people out there that want to steal your energy and benefit off of you without while having to do little to no work to gain access to you. Intimacy for me is a deep spiritual exchange so I really value safety and care and with hook up culture you’re not getting any of that.
Yesss to all of this
Absolutely to this! Energy transfer is real especially during intimacy and sex - we gotta be careful who we’re having sex with as we may end up taking on other people’s trauma / energy which leads to detrimental effects on us physically and mentally. Negative and positive energies can be created from performing the act. If more people keep this in mind, we can work towards having less toxic relationships moving forward. Be conscious of who you share your body with and protect your energy
THIS is it! 🙌🏽 💯
Absolutely to valuing safety and exchange. Some of my “hookups” were sexual assaults or me feeling violated. Not all men see consent as common sense so I need to clearly communicate that boundary prior and not be afraid of their reaction or them thinking it’s minuscule. It will help save my peace at the end.
AGREED‼️💯
Over 30% of young Men are not having sex, many never have.
Ever.
Hook Up culture is occuring for a small percentage of Men - and the majority of females.
Let that sink in.
Exactly
Keep saying it maybe they will hear you..
Ngl as much crap as we get for "us" dragging on hookup culture I wish I actually was.
I'd probably be a lot happier if I was one of those dudes lmao
Thats the funny part. They complain about the same dudes who pump and dump them who get all the segs. Average men get nothing in hookup culture
That´s why they automatically assume, that every handsome guy is a player.
But in reality, they are just projecting😂
A lot of women lack hobbies and treat men as their primary source of entertainment. I think the majority of men stand to gain if hook up culture was reduced. The men who benefit from hookup culture are a much smaller percent of men.
Good observation. Your comment and the idea that you introduced should be more well known. 👍
@@LilacSreyaMen have already been saying how they're invisible to women for years and not a part of hookup culture. People just don't care because we're men and everything is our fault/own problem.
@@J-iq9de the thing is even if we are visible would we take most of those women seriously? We have so much access to and a lot of the times are drowned by sexual content than any other man in the history of mankind. And I think that itself is having an effect on men as well bc some of us don’t really have that desire anymore to even go to connect with a woman whether it be trust issues, over sexualization, etc. it’s just bad all around for men and women
@@lobmob3235 Personally, no. I don't really care about being visible to them either because I wouldn't bother still.
I'm honestly not interested in dating at all. There's always an exception somewhere but I don't want any part of it truthfully.
I just thought the "well known" thing was funny because I've heard it for a decade now.
Look, man. Women *KNOW* that the majority of men are invisible to them and are not a part of hookup culture. So a lot of them have taken their resources elsewhere, and now they're mad because they're retirement plans (the "lames" they never wanted and STILL don't want) are gone. I'm genuinely starting to think videos like these are nothing but attempts to gaslight us. The phrase "momma's baby, daddy's maybe" will *NEVER GO AWAY* because that's how they do.
Once you have THIS realization you're like grossed out by certain people you let have access to you (in anyway not just intimacy). Then it's another journey to forgive yourself for that aspect of it.
💯
😮💨😮💨😮💨 U ain't lyin. This shit has been exhausting. Hookups are never worth it. Just go exercise instead or really do anything you stand to benefit from in the long term instead.
If it’s outside of marriage, we should be grossed out by all of them
Have you ever considered that having sex with someone is the same as marrying them or establishing a union that should last a life time?
So once you've been used up by Tyrone you want a clean up guy? 😂 Meme gender fr
It’s so scary out here. I know three people personally with HIV. They are very young and all they wanted to do is “ have fun”. You really have to be safe out here
It’s like that old Eminem song
“I’ve been with 10 women who got HIV. Now don’t you wanna grow up to be just like me? I got g€nit@l warts and it burns when I pee. Don’t you wanna grow up to be just like me?”
Edit: slightly misremembered the line
Exactly STDs and HIV and HPV will never go away
Yea, people are out here acting like these diseases are cured. They are STILL very much alive and kicking.
Wow 5 different people with h.i.v. that's scary smh.
I just recently learned that you can still get herpes while using a condom
Wow different 3 people with h.i.v is really scary.
I recently learned that you can get herpes with using a condom
Craziest part is women told other women casual sex was liberating
As a man I’m starting to appreciate the whole 3 month rule. Plus I think more men need to appreciate their body.
Good work💃
Yea, as a man, when i was in my early 20s, i was in several situations where I got in bed with girls way too fast (this DC/NYC nightlife up here had me seeing new girls every week). Little did I know, I was too immature to handle all that, and I ended up making things a mess. If i had more discipline and communicated more intentionally back then, i could've avoided breaking all those hearts.
Now that im 31, im way more intentional with how i get with a woman. Im still taking time off to build myself (as I've been doing for the last 5 years), but when the time comes, I'll definitely be more disciplined.
Thanks it was something Lynette said tbh. That men we go into parties wasted and display masculine energy. Mixed in with the intention to have sex the same day. Like when she said I wanted change my mindset and be cautious of what I doing
I've always followed this rule. So many women are not worth it.
3 months lol. More 3 years
I overheard a group of men at my university talking abt hook up culture. They were talking abt how they never had an issue being successful with women but then admitted every intimate interaction left them feeling empty. Made me realize it’s not just women who feel like this
Wow it reminds me of what a guy told me during a date..
I mean the creator of this video said it herself; I’m in college rn and I’ve literally told multiple women no.
Why do women give it up so easy knowing there’s men that will pay more or wait longer for the same product
Yes, they just feel empty. All human beings will feel like this, whether man or woman, because human beings are designed to want and need real emotional connection to other human beings. Pretending that this is not the case and that you can get around this and still feel fulfilled is a lie.
Yep. I’m a man and I’ve felt this many times before. I’m supposedly more sensitive than other, but I can recall every time I’ve had pointless sex with a woman I wasn’t committed to I felt like I was 1.) adding to her trauma (deep down I know it’s not normal for this woman to be having sex with me in these circumstances with no commitment and there’s lowkey something spiritually wrong with her) 2.) disappointing my child self by engaging in lust 3.) cheating on my future wife and 4.) I don’t even know this girl’s body so it’s not that enjoyable, it’s only really “good” with a committed girlfriend.
I have a strong ego that isn’t validated by anything outside myself so I don’t get any ego boost from sex, it doesn’t even feel that good, it feels soulless, I’ve had sex with girls I didn’t even like as a person and I just want to leave after the deed is done, the list goes on and on. It’s why I stopped doing it, turned to Christ and have gone celibate. Hookup culture is honestly NASTY bro.
@@FullyOnVolks it is nasty and it isn´t a culture. It´s a lack of any culture. And it has been literally sold to people for certain other to people to be able to make money from it.
When hookup culture was at peak, I, a girl, rejected it from the start. I'm so happy that now people are beginning to reject it too and understand its bad consequences.
The sex is always fun when it's happening but then you always regret it when they ghost you, and you realized they manipulated your emotions. It's cruel.
I think it’ll help if you don’t hoe around. Be with that person for a couple months to get to them before you initiate anything. A man that is patient is more likely to not use you and is there for a genuine and honest reason
@@kevinsandrea6433 I wish you were right. But some men will wait months and still ghost you.... I never wanted this for myself. What woman does? I've always wanted just one partner. It's not my falt or my lifestyle choice it's just the world we live in now. Porn and mainstream media has ruined my generation.
@@kevinsandrea6433That’s not always true. You can know a man for almost a year and they will treat you as a nobody once physical intimacy is involved. If not “hoeing around” in the first couple of months worked then there would be so such thing as situationships which are longer.
@@songwriterlife7777that is true! And toxic podcasts and self proclaimed dating coaches ruined it as well.
@@kevinsandrea6433 Fore sure. I think people will respond to you about how it doesn't always work. Nothing always works but it absolutely helps.
Hookup culture is terrible. I feel like it only benefits one sex, you could think it’s all fun and then start to develop feelings while the other person is already looking for their next catch.
It benefits no one actually.
It is the men women are attracted to and are going for as to the reason this is happening. If the man started catching feelings then the woman would be more likely to lose interest, women want in demand men who they know are desirable to other women, the more sensitive, romantic men who maybe arent as confident with the opposite sex get left by the wayside and when they do meet someone they come across as needy and the woman often then ends things.
Blame the other women who brainwashed you, NOT MEN. WOMEN. WOMEN DID THIS TO YOU
@@rjflores438This is facts. Recent Studies show that over 30% of young men today are virgins. That means that a lot of women today are hooking up with the same few guys and then complaining about them. It is what it is.
Definitely
Over 70% of men have no idea what it’s like to participate in hookup culture we just watch from the sidelines like “huh must be nice” 😂
Yup, they yet again rebrand things that had clear definitions to clean up their image. Its just whoredom. And its mostly women to blame. Even ugly girls I know had more bodies than me. And they were so ready to sleep around, and as a guy I had restraint. I think good guys are not looking to sleep around. We want one person to spend the rest of our lives with. The painful thing is, that girl you love has been giving head to your future coworkers and employers since college. Even when you win you lose because the women are used up and really have nothing to offer.
yeah thats so fling cap😂 70%?????? says who
@@nanouberthe7598 employment statistics, education statistics, females tending to prefer men with money, jobs, status, house, car, older, more and more women postponing serious relationships for education meaning by the time they are ready to settle down the "good guy" conveniently is now earning a good living and can save her from the streets.
@@nanouberthe7598
statistics: on dating apps only 20% of men have several matches.
Biology: The traits that women search in men correspond to 20% of the population or less (like height, status, money, etc).
And so on.
@@nanouberthe7598 Its true. Men are not drowning in sex like women are. Its a smaller percent of men getting the most.
I agree with 99% of this. I disagree with being lied to. We've known about hookup culture for a long time. If you are participating in hookup culture, it's bcuz you understand the risk and consent to it. The problem with hookup culture is that women see situationships as a trial period for a relationship. That's not how casual works. Casual is meant to stay casual. Then, women get upset when men aren't interested in more. Baby, that's what you signed up for. If you are going into casual with ulterior motives, unspoken expectations, or the inability to not catch feelings. You shouldn't be doing it.
Dawg no👎🏾
Anyone who has detached feelings from sex, is blocked from experiencing true intimacy with another person. There's no putting that gemie back in the bottle, short of amnesia maybe. That's a real tragedy.
@@abnormpsych17 Yes.
Thank you! So tired of seeing ppl sign up for blatantly casual connections and then blame men as if they didn't do it to themselves. It's even worse when the person is telling you they don't want a relationship and you CONTINUE to see them, hoping their mind will change.. Then cry about someone breaking your heart? Oh brother.
Every scenario boils down to wanting to conquer the one that does not wants them. It's an ego based thing. That's what makes it icky to me. Like, you're not even really heartbroken, just ego bruised because you couldn't get them to want you. Eye roll.
@@Rossi.K absolute facts I realised this too. Many women destroying their souls in pursuit of flesh and ego. No wisdom, no maturity, no intelligence about what she’s doing. She chases men purely out of ego, like female animals do, and wonders why every single time she gets ghosted and told she isn’t as on top of the world as she thinks she is.
As a man I fully agree with your statement and I believe men should care more about who they decide to sleep with
Facts
True always use protection if anything
Definitely. The issue that we as men face is that we are considered lame if we don’t decide to get involved in that lifestyle and praised for having high body counts but I hope guys don’t fall into that pressure/trap. And people forget about the STD aspect of it too💀
@@lobmob3235 💯
We gone keep piping these 304s
I love this. For years I thought I was asexual because I’m not interested in casual sex and I thought that was the only way to date. Even though asexuality is valid, I’ve realized I’m not asexual - I just personally really need a close mutual connection with someone before I become intimate with them. I’m 25 and a virgin because I’m still waiting to really like someone and have them return my feelings, which hasn’t happened yet. That’s what works for me and I get that everyone is different, I know many other women would read this comment and disagree which is okay! But I really can’t wrap my head around letting someone I don’t trust and really like be that close to me. But tbh the social stigma of being an “older virgin” (whatever that means) really does get to me sometimes, even tho outside of social expectations I’m content with my life
You have such strong Character, dont let others convince u otherwise.
It takes so much wisdom to be able to know what’s best for you & stick beside it when other ppl seem to be doing things differently so huge props to you. When the right person comes along you’ll be in a wayyy healthier place to receive love than a lot of other ppl are
I am a woman turning 31 this year & I have this to say to you:
PROTECT & HONOR YOURSELF! Fuck the stigma of being an older virgin. Other people’s opinions are irrelevant because NO ONE controls your life but YOU! I was also an older virgin & casual sex was never a goal of mine. I honestly opposed it & still do. I did not have any desire to share my body with any or everybody just because! I never was in an environment with people who shared similar values to me. I was called old-school & out of touch in regard towards my idea of how I wanted to date someone long-term before having sex. However, the older I got, the more I let how others view & judge my personal decisions get to me. I got to my late 20s & was tired of being clowned by peers so I gave in & tried to adapt to “modern dating” & casual hookups. Literally the FIRST time I decided to be intimate with anyone & participate in a casual hookup I ended up in a dating horror story that damn near resembled a Lifetime movie & I am not even exaggerating when I say that. That whole experience has left me with long-term psychological trauma I still deal with on a daily & have to work through. If I could turn back the hands of time, I would have held on longer & be proud to be a 31 year old virgin because my body is special & deserves only someone special to have access to me.
I say all of this to say as not only words of encouragement, but also as big sisterly wisdom, YOU ARE COMPLETELY NORMAL! What isn’t normal are people who are preoccupied with the idea of your sex life & them expecting you to live it according to THEIR standards. Do not look at how others are living & think because you are not doing what they are that something is wrong with you. Comparison is the theft of joy. Continue living your life according to what you want & what you desire because THAT is where true happiness & PEACE comes from! ❤
Psalm 27:14 🙏🏿👍🏽✝️ 🙇🏾 Luke 18 :1 🙏🏿🙇🏾
@@FreshPrincessof011wow I really needed to hear this. Thank you so much for sharing your experience, im so sorry it wasn’t a good one. Everything you said is so encouraging and makes me feel less alone. It’s hard to go against the grain, but staying true to myself and how I view relationships is so worth it
“I was lost but now I’m found!”
“I know my worth now”
“I was fooled”
“I’m born again”
A tale as old as time🤦♂️
A woman that hasn't exercised any type of discipline/self-control in her past no longer qualifies for a man who has disciplined himself in his past to create a bright future.
Spot on
Discipline is everything
If you do have it at young age then you will NEVER get in the future.
NOT for faint hearted people
Agreed!
Fax.
This is genuinely part of the reason dating is difficult nowadays. So many ran through women nowadays
Well-said, sir!
My grandmother: "Honey, a man's job is to spread his seed. Your job is to only allow the best seed in your garden." ❤
that is not a mans job. a mans job is to raise his kids not pump and dump women.
@@ang695 Agreed. A man's job is indeed what you said. My grandmother said it much better. My quote is just my from my cursory memory. Thanks for the clarity.
As a guy I don't agree with that
We actually have the seed - the egg. Men have the fertilizers
No, that’s very sexist thinking. Everyone should have the freedom to do what they want with their body. They shouldn’t feel pressured to not have sex, and they shouldn’t feel pressured to have sex either, regardless of gender. Women feel a lot of shame and experience a lot of violence with this kind of thinking, and men end up sleeping around, treating women badly, and feeling empty themselves.
I know you’re focusing on women but as a gay man I felt this! Hook up culture is the norm in the qay community and I hate it when friends assume that it’s something I’m engaging in. People will literally be shocked if you tell them that you’ve never linked to hookup with someone you met on an app. I try not to judge others but it’s like they’re also judging you for not engaging in it at the same time or pressuring you to engage.
Fr and idk why but open relations and cheating is also so normal in the the gay culture idk why its so sad
I think it’s sad too 😢 so hard to find emotional connection. All anyone wants is just casual meaningless sex. I like that too. But it would be nice if we could have both
I hear women that I know complain consistently about the men that they sleep with not committing to them or ghosting them, I have come to understand that some women don't know the difference between a guy liking them and a guy wanting to sleep with them. Please know the difference.
How? They all lie till they get what they want
@@TheMotArt In my humble opinion and experience it isn’t a lie when a guy says that he likes a girl in this context, he usually does but that doesn’t mean he wants a relationship.
This is gonna come across as harsh but to put it bluntly it means, “I like you, you’re attractive and I want to sleep with you, but I don’t want to be with you”.
You just realized something that religions are telling us for centuries.
u gotta remember to women, religion is patriarchy designed by men to control women. so women disregarded the very good advice to not sleep around like a prostitute, because the advice came from men. now that women fafo'd & hit that age where they're looking to lock down that provider, all of a sudden chastity is important to women. funny how that works.
Always after getting used by a lot of guys they realize that 😂😂😂😂
@@AlbertisFamily yes. And it's a shame really. Because it hurts both sides.
Do anything..ANYTHING but don’t give it up. You’re not missing out on anything. You already know what that’s like the confusion & the pain so it’s time to prioritize your mental!
"Clean up on aisle chad" 😂
If you don't give it up to Chad or Tyrone he'll be on to the next one anyways.
And he's the man you desire most. You're certainly not giving the "cornys" a chance.
all men hear is: "prioritize your mental" in your 30's when your looks decline & you've had all your "fun" in the streets. now you're looking to trick a gullible fool into marrying you & thinking you're "pure" so he can break bread & be a provider for you & pay your bills lol smh
men are up on game now. we're not falling for the standard women's dating playbook anymore... ladies... the jig is up.
I VE BEEN NEDDIN THIS FOR SO LOOONG ... It's been months since I don't date anyone and although is the best decision i've ever made (to focus on my career and myself) I still can feel the overwhelming pressure of people questioning me why I don't go out, meet people, or just hook up with someone I randomly could like. Sometimes I even find myself questioning my choices, when staying away from toxic and mediocre relationships and experiences made my life so much better in many wyas: emotionally, phisically, financially... I just don't feel comfortable anymore going with some random guy one night and throw the stabilty I've built right away, just to feel desirable/loveable and get male validation. Women, we are united in this! We are waking up! Thank you Lynette😍
I relate to this so much. Don’t let anyone make you feel weird about it you know what’s best for you!!
Yes stand on business!
Women aren’t waking up lmao.
@@Nancys_minion221they are already addicted to that life , they will come back , the only hope for a man is not to end up with one of these women as a wife , you’ll regret it
This is a high vibrational message for women and men. Let's keep it a stack. Sex is a drug. It's a temporary high that never fills your void. I had a lot of mindless sex in my day that never added to or progressed my life in ANY way. It actually subtracted from it. The temporary pleasure was epic but the long term effects were costly. It's a sacred energy exchange that you can take on your partner's weird and toxic traits. Who wants someone's crappy ass personality? Hey, choose wisely who connect with. Sex was created to be beautiful. Not empty and devoid of emotion. Yes it's for procreation but we weren't created to just be animals in the wild F'ing and Fighting . We are intelligent and spiritual beings. Our bodies are our temples. When you treat it with that reverence and respect others have no choice to. We all need a cleanse from the visual sex and the physical sex at some point. Especially if it controls our day. There's more to life. More to do. There's joy beyond hooking up. When you connect to The Source. You'll find out.
Peace.
P.o.p.
Yall it’s time. We’re called to be celibate or to practice abstinence. Prioritize nurturing yourself and your friendships & leave the rest to God. This is the peace we’ve been desiring.
Yes I’ve started practicing abstinence again for the 3rd time. It’s never been worth it for me to backslide just to experience physical touch
@@se2664 relatable but I think it feels much better knowing your not alone in your experiences and that your not missing out on much worthwhile
Yes ma'am. There's a reason people have always encouraged women to be abstinent. And no, it was never about " controlling women".
Yasss be celibate and don't date your looksmatch 💪 you should rightly be single rather than settling for someone who is not a Tyrone.
@@adams8830 fr‼️
I agree with a lot of what ur saying. More men have left me feeling horrible than not. And I highly regret every single hook up I ever had. Good for you for speaking on this topic even tho you were nervous.
I didn't think she was nervous at all...I thought she did a really good job explaining her thoughts and opinions. Who made u the emotion cop?
@@montycrawford5684 She literally said she was nervous in the video 🤦🏽♀️
What do you feel like pushed you to do it in the first place?
@@FullyOnVolksin my experience as a woman i was just having fun. i do not regret any hook ups. however ive been celibate for 4.5 years. the whole hook up thing & dealing with men became a problem i didnt want to deal with
edited to add: i didnt have a ton of hooks ups, only with men i really knew & trusted
How many shots did you take to the face by random men 😂😂😂... how isn't that obviously a bad idea?
As a man I’ve never viewed sex as simply enjoyment or fulfilling my biological needs. I truly viewed it as something sacred and genuine connection with the opposite sex whom I felt real connection with. Yes, I know other guys who viewed it as fun but later they realized it made them feel empty inside. I agree that women view it as more intimate than men, and it’s not to say that there are no men who look at it as something intimate but honestly it is rare these days. This issue stems heavily on pornography because most men are addicted to it which messes up how they would view women.
Porn isn't real sex and images aren't real women. While it is damaging to relationships, the damage from porn is reversed after a short period of abstaining.
Sadly, the damage from recreational sex is deep and permanent. Especially if feelings have ever been detached from sex, then true intimacy is impossible.
Completely agree with you about the porn.
Men aren't the ones benefitting. Women have 10x more access to men and sex than men do. 1 in 3 men, are NOT having sex. So it's definitely 1 sided. That said, I am personally waiting for marriage, but bonding and commitment are on a downward trend for women.
Im almost 23 and never even had any dating experience or even my first kiss. There were people interested in me but I always felt that they were not the one. I dont know but lately I have been feeling a lot of pressure on me from myself but also my surroundings. my friends always tell me that I am not missing out anything and guys my age are mostly not worth my time anyways. But I dont know I am scared of not meeting the one
Save yourself for that experience with your husband
You’re so young! You will find the right one in time don’t worry or let other ppl pressure you cuz you’re honestly going to be in a way healthier headspace when the right person does come along
100%. I am not even ready anyways and in a stage in my life where I get to know myself. ❤
Good for you, the lack of experience will make the right man happy. Believe me, men are NOT looking for 'experienced women' when it comes to building together and sharing their lives. Just look for similar values in a man and avoid promiscuous men, many of which lie and manipulate, and carry disease.
You are truly a woman blessed by the Lord then. Count your blessings because you have many.
I think an issue many men have, which I believe is a valid one; is it hurts them to know that the woman they're interested in had let other men into her temple with little effort and affection on the part of the man.
I believe it is important that both men & women apply a standard for access to themselves and even if they failed to do so before, that they continue to move forward with a set standard and transparency with the person they're interested in/involved with.
It's just a byproduct of the way men & women have evolved to view intimacy, and unfortunately for many women most men simply cannot operate healthily in a relationship knowing many or even a few men have had their person in an intimate way so easily before him, especially when it was much easier for them than him. it's literally like finding out your parents genuinely love your sibling more than you when you're still a kid.
Even if the intimacy isn't a reflection of her love and closeness to that person it's near impossible to separate that idea from sexual interactions.
Of course the same can certainly be applied to women, you just don't necessarily see it very often.
Hoping that everyone finds someone for whom they can be emotionally close with and intimacy feels loving accepting and natural between them. 🙏🏽
Facts. Women need to stop following the world and choosing men out of their egos
SO MUCH TRUTH WAS SAID IN THIS VIDEO. I’m a 16 y/o girl from Spain and let me tell you hookup culture is very much present in my generation. I’m so glad you made this video because i sometimes feel like im missing out on being a teen for not hooking up with people but then i realise it’s really not what i want and it doesn’t align with who i am and who i want to be. I want to meet someone that treats me like a queen, makes me feel comfortable and safe, and until that person comes around i’m not letting anyone into my temple. For everyone that feels the same just know that you’re not alone and that just because a lot of people do something DOESN’T MEAN ITS THE BEST THING FOR YOU. Be confident in your beliefs and don’t let ANYBODY talk you into things you dont want. You can do this ❤
Thank you sm for this video Lynette ❤❤
Blame other women
@@RexJacobus-bb1vw😂😂😂😂 they keep playing themselves all the time
Sex is a big deal, intimacy and connection are a big deal. If people are going around numbing themselves to all that, that cant be good
Exactly! Sex is a spiritual experience
And people take it for granted
I wrote my masters dissertation on the consequences of hook up culture and the related effects combined with dating apps - thanks so much for highlighting this in your TH-cam video as I do believe it’s become normalised in society today and I think it’s become so harmful on how we connect with people now and our lack of satisfaction within relationships today (for example men statistically are more lonely now more than what’s been recorded historically)
I’d love to read your dissertation! That’s a great topic. Are you studying to become a LMFT?
The myth that "men are lonely" is what your liberal programming wants you to believe. Serious men for most parts are more productive and fullfilled when they're by themselves. Yes they may want some female companion here and there, but its just distraction.
Why is it that statistically, men tend to experience more loneliness, rather than attributing it solely to anyone (men or women) who engages in hookup culture? After all, it involves both genders, doesn't it?
@@professorfinnih hookup culture only includes a small percentage of men. Until later ages where many men who were excluded before try to make up for it. It's unhealthy, pathetic and sad, and incredibly damaging to all involved.
I think dating apps are far worse for the average man, not the top 5%, which is often what most women go for. Dating apps have made many men completely celibate for long periods of time since most women now dont even want to interact with men they dont know and never approach men anymore and men are now scared to talk to women and show interest.
This is all very true especially regarding other cultures who don’t partake in hookup culture! I have a friend who got deported back to his country (saudi arabia) and he told me he likes to visit USA because he can easily hookup here with little to no effort😬
Women it’s in our power to FIX the damage we created with thinking this is liberation!
Thank you for acknowledging that women are the ones who created and pushed this. Us men simply said "Ya just giving it away? No commitment required? Ok sounds good to us"
@@bronxishomenomatterwhereig3149You are the type of men we DON'T want. It is the fault of both men and women. Ladies, close those legs and men, keep it in your pants.
You only need one thing here, looking good and enough money to go out. I missed my old day 😂
And women in the west can’t fix themselves because they are already fucked up , I’m just sorry for the men who gonna end up with them
After going through a tough break up in January I felt this desire to find someone else so I wouldn’t have to feel that pain and void. As someone who’s spiritual n does self introspection, I came to realize that I have to feed my spirit and not the flesh. Learning how to love myself thoroughly and change the way I see and use my sexual energy is the journey I’m on right now and it’s healin that heartbreak💯
You are on a nice path, dont let the society make you feel bad about yourself and stick to your resolutions. 👊
@@steeveolivier2847 much gratitude 🙏🏾✨☀️
i recently withheld sex from a man because i didn’t feel safe with him and it was incredible to see the entitlement he’d cultivated to women’s bodies and lack of respect for people he engaged with. i’m extremelyyyy grateful to have not let him into my space that way, and to myself for continuing to cultivate the discernment (not always perfect) of when and how to engage
It's not entitlement. You STILL don't know JACK SHIT about men. Only about you, blah blah blah. I'm sure you teased him and waited until absolutely last minute to tell him. AND you never did that with any of your hook ups before. JUST SHUT UP
Did you ever stop to think that maybe just maybe he felt it insulting that you let guys with "lower vibration" get access to you almost instantaneously and are yet telling him that he has to wait?
What is he waiting for? To buy the cow when all the other men got the milk for free?
He probably dodged a bullet if we're keeping it 💯
You probably smell like fish anyway.
Yeah, but this is the kind of guy women always give it to. It's like they say alpha f#$!s and beta bucks. It's totally true at least in the west .
He probably was recieving signals from your past, that other men have gotten you easy...Men are pissed when we don't get sex, IF we realize that there were men that were able to do less, yet get the box....I doubt you chilled with that guy as a virgin. Yeah he might not've had you feel safe....how many dates had it been since you felt that? How long had this guy been attempting to "prove himself" to you, for you to turn around and not feel safe?...I don't know you, and can't force and image on you....but men do know when we're getting treated less than, and when other men of your past have gotten better.
I swear that god speaks to me through you, you're literally the only TH-camr I watch consistently and what you speak about always connects with me. I ask for answers to things going on in my life and what I should do and your videos pop right up.
❤️ I’m so glad this resonates!
I'm from a society where premarital sex is not allowed. It was a shock when I first came to the US and saw rampant casual sex is. How do people just sleep together and act as if it's just like drinking water. I'm a man and I don't understand this type of hookup culture.
Thank you for bringing attention to this. Hook up culture brought me emptiness. Now all i desire is someone i can connect emotionally and spiritually with, which will then bring sex naturally for me
No it won't. You gave it up to lots of dudes who didn't provide any of that. No changing the price now. 🤦🏿♂️
You called the truth misogynist for years. Cant help you now, seek jesus.
Every guy I talk to wants and feels entitled to sex. The dating world feels impossible. Even the "good ones" end up cheating if you don't give them what they want cause they know they can just go online and find it. It's actually really depressing. And nobody asks you out in person anymore so you're forced to go on dating apps.
I agree it is sad but I feel hopeful things are changing as more women wake up
Heavy on the no one asks you out in person!!😭 If people were more bold I’d be off Tinder. Like I guess I could also go up to people but *
sigh*
I always tell my female friends to ask out men they are interested in to save time instead of waiting. Or give clear signals and not be so coy.
@@ElizabethManly-Spain-jf3ek men don't initiate anymore its the woman's job. Times have changed...
Where would we talk to women? Women go online and complain about men at the gym. Women go online and talk about men being creepy in grocery stores, women complain about being hit on by men in public all the time. Do you think that incentivizes men to talk to women more in public?
I'm a man that has had conversations with other men about dating. From what I've heard most men don't enjoy dating. It's just seen as an obstacle to whatever he really wants ( usually sex ). I think society has done a poor job of making the courting process a mutually enjoyable thing... So my question is how do you think society can make the courting process something that men look forward to instead of seeing it as a series of hoops to jump through to get sex?
That’s a good question. All I can think of is as women continue decentering men from our lives, men will have no choice but to put more effort into courting women appropriately or pay sex workers.
@@se2664 I would prefer for society to change dating into an exchange that is mutually beneficial and enjoyable for both men and women. But that may just be wishful thinking. What you said is most likely the outcome that society is going toward with all this gender war stuff.
@@se2664 I'd rather pay a sex worker or move to a country where the women are worth courting.
@@se2664 the problem is that women have made themselves very undesirable to men too by the way they act. It’s not ALL on men’s behaviour. Women’s behaviour has turned many men off too which is why men don’t court. Look at the female musicians nowadays. 21savage said it best… no man is trying to court that woman.
@@thoughtzzz9267 that would nice too but like you said it’s wishful thinking
❤❤ love this convo. At 23 I said I had enough of random hook ups, had a year of celibacy and then found my husband. I felt like we met because we were both spiritually aligning, and we weren’t into dating just for sex. Sex is powerful, so you just want to be cautious about who you’re giving it to, and why.
Where’d you meet your husband
@@se2664 I met him when I started doing stand up comedy. We were both in classes at the time and have now been together and doing stand up ever since 🥹❤️💖
You found a goofy, that was unaware he was giving his highest praise to someone other men had for only a fraction of what was required of him.🤷♂️
If your husband only knew what they looked like, and how many men you were intimate with you, you wouldn't have a marriage.
I couldn’t agree more! I have not participated in hookup culture in over 4 years and I couldn’t be happier with my decision. My body & soul are much more at peace because of it. 🙏🏽🧘🏽♀️
Also, I was literally watching a video on Awwlexis’s channel ft. Mina Irfan about this topic when you posted this video - divine timing! We are all waking up as a collective!!!
Oozers how are u ?
But do you still have desires for the same type of men....yup. it's like a meth addiction
too late already ran thru.
Just got ghosted by someone that was pursuing me for 3 months. Now I regret the intimacy. I’m so tired..
Girl I make them chase for 2 years, then i ghost them😮
@@Exoticbarbie. Yep sounds about right. Everyone is just trying to play and get over on each other. Glad I checked out of society and became somewhat of a hermit.
I'm sorry to hear that. It's sad. They can switch up at any time with no warning.
@@bronxishomenomatterwhereig3149 I'm a male virgin here, and I agree with your statement.
@@Exoticbarbie. you’re doing that out of pain and building up karmic debt. What you need to do is heal, I don’t say this in a condescending way. Turn to Christ love.
we are only at the place we are because of eachother. We don’t exist without eachother. We need eachother and everyone’s forgetting we were MADE FOR EACHOTHER. glad people are starting to say this more!
Hookup culture is definitely a lie. one guy who tricked me into thinking he liked me and took my v card was enough. He then ran off with a close friend of mine while we were seeing each other. Luckily, the next prospect met my father, was friend zoned for a prolonged period and became my soon to be husband. Met at 18. Engaged 25. Married 27. Best decision of my life! Pick the best men, and vet them thoroughly over 4-6 months. My man is perfect mix of traditionally masculine but has many progressive ideas so it’s the best of both words! Hookup culture is sold as this idea as women’s liberation and freedom of sexuality when the truth is the men are judging us for it behind our backs because they want something..Let’s be real, most of the time men are benefitting from these encounters and women are thrown to the curb. I’m lucky I selected carefully all the qualities I wanted, and didn’t settle for less. The truth is, it might be that the people interested in marriage partner off earlier, and the people who arnt delay it for more fun experiences. I know not always the case but still
I’m so sorry that happened to you but I’m so glad you learned from it & were able to find your person! Agreed deciding not to settle will change your life for the better
Lmao 😂
Absolutely your best discussion Lynette! There is no deeper connection than having someone INSIDE you and I truly appreciate you acknowledging how as a society, we’ve over simplified this act by making it a casual experience….great discussion👏🏽👍🏽
ur so right bro, and the timing of your video is literally insane like especially since we're ina retograde rn. anytime im thinking about ole boy imma come back and sit and listen for 19 minutes and 54 seconds because when you look at how he's treating me and what im about to offer..it's so not worth it and it makes me very sick that there were times i thought it was. i love you so much bro and thank you so much for the video..im also about to reach a year now that i've been celibate so i can't explain how the timing of this video was like a divine calling or something.
although I think men and women are spiritually very similar and that women have had to be more spiritually inclined bc we were not naturally granted safety and protection in this reality and that we have to fight for it or learn to allow ourselves safety later in life perhaps, every woman needs to hear this video. Bc when you said if all women stopped dating men the world would heal, girl……….. the way I’ve thought this so many times. We truly have so much power and are not using it to our advantage
Yesss women are waking up now though so I’m excited to see this shift
@@LynetteAdkins youre right women are waking up
Be careful what U wish for. When artificial wombs become a reality, you wouldn't be talking like that.
How weren’t you granted safety and protection in this reality? Do you think men were granted safety and protection?
Wake up, the majority of men are incels and not dating.
if you dated men who loved you, instead of the guy who looks like what you see on social media, maybe the world wouldn't need healing.
Lynette, your videos are always on timeeeee! Needed this
❤️
I’m glad that I’ve never done casual hookup. Lots of men say I’ll regret but I think it’s the other way round that I’ll regret if I share my body with random people.
This is such a great, timely video. I am actually on my own celibacy journey that you inspired me to start when you spoke about it on your travels in Asia last summer. I’m only 4 months in and the difference in my brain chemistry is crazy. Thank you for sharing! I hope you are well! And I hope deku is okay too ❤❤
This was not all over the place. This was well put together. I needed this. Thank you.❤
As an asian, we are taught to protect our own body as a woman until we are married. In today’s world, our country’s culture has been mixed with westerns a lot, and I recognize men become less respecting women’s body. It is sad to see that
That's my SE Asian wife as well who I met in college. She has a strict moral code, and strong values. I was more than happy to wait as long as needed to demonstrate my intent and commitment. In return, it assured me of her character and values. 30 years later as empty nesters, I couldn't be more in love and grateful that I married her. She still has that sparkle in her eye and shy smile when we're intimate, even after all these years. It's amazing.
The women must respect her body 1st
purush mahilayo ka samman karna band kar dete hai tishu pepar ki tarh istemal karate hai
If you call it out, you're a misogynist
Well thank feminism for that, it’s empowering to hook up.
Thank you for this Lynette. This video came at the right time, I’ve been celibate as well for over a year. I definitely feel the liberation from it all and I want to keep going
This was so eloquently explained. Thank you Lynette for making this video! ❤ so needed
This is a powerful conversation. Keep speaking truth.
Always dropping gems! Keep it up!
i love love love that you’re talking about this. it’s something i’ve thought a lot about and have changed my views around. i, too, used to think hooking up was okay for me and now i see my body and energy are so valuable. i can’t give them away to just anyone. only a man who can meet me where i’m at. thank you for sharing your experiences and opening up this conversation amongst women and men.
it’s crazy you mention mina! listening to her has literally changed my life. i’ve been subscribed to her for over a year and recently started taking her courses and they are 🤯 even more potent and transformative than her videos on YT.
"now i see my body and energy are so valuable. i can’t give them away to just anyone." --- translation: i gave away my body for free to men way out of my league & now that i'm past 30 & my biological clock is ticking, I need to lock down a provider, a gullible guy who will look past my flaws & sexcapades I had in my youth & the incurable std's I picked up in college.
"only a man who can meet me where i’m at." --- translation: he needs to have enough cash to ride this ride.
men see right through the buIIshit. i think its best that women stop acting like they've changed when they really haven't.
This was sooo needed no need to be shook to deliver girl you hit it with this ❤ thank you
The fact that something this obvious "needed" to be said just shows how utterly sad this whole thing is.
Men have been saying how bad this is for decades.
Most women and a very very small amount of men have experienced hook up culture. Most men have never experienced it
Yep. Women are attracted the same demonically influenced men over and over and all wondering why he didn’t pick them
They all go after the same 5% of men
Would love a video on your celibacy journey, I'm considering it myself.
Wow, thank you for this and the video in the description. ❤️ appreciate this sm love✨
Such a great video. Truly came at the perfect time. Everything you said was so spot on. Heavy on the desensitization in the media, rap culture, raising standards, and spiritual transactions!!! Also big up on your celibacy journey! Loved this.
Just started dating at 23...were you a virgin before or casual?
Generally I would agree hookup culture can be harmful for woman particularly, however I would resist the idea that if I have a sexual interaction with a man he “got me” just because I feel like for me personally, a single to a couple sexual experiences doesn’t even scratch the surface of what I could potentially offer someone. My philosophy is if a man is properly interested in you, sex (whether it’s earlier or later) will not deter their curiosity to get to know you better. If it’s a one and done I just refuse to feel shame around it bc at the end of the day it take two. Love you Lynette ty for the thought provoking videos as always!! 💓
I agree, it’s 2 peoples choice and people shouldn’t feel shame but the reality is that women are gatekeeping it for a large amount of men interested. The reality is I think men and others are skeptical of others including women, and people go by peoples actions. If a woman sleeps with a man on the first date, it is an action he can choose to judge, it may be one of the only actions he has seen her in the last 24 hours. because in the end, I suppose depending on the circumstance it may be a bad decision- strangers are not safe, could have disease or a host of other behavioural or bad traits. If I slept with a man on the first date I would even question- does he do this often? Does he value it the same as me? Because it is a curiosity trying to understand a person.
So true, I agree!
😂😂😂😂
You shouldn’t feel shame, but you shouldn’t be giving it out freely under the guise of “well, you didn’t get all I could give you.” Go celibate and turn to Christ and find a husband. Fornication messes up your pairbonding (for both men and women) regardless of how you think about it.
You let him traverse your soul and gave these guys the best experience of life....what can you offer more than that?
Sex is NOT intriguing if I am not receiving safety, stability, consistency and action! I’m seeing a shift in media where there is a lot more people getting married, having kids and or finding that long term partner. May we all heal our traumas and stop chasing our shadows. We got this, ladies 💗 And for the ones that find joy and liberation in sex, you freaking GO glen coco. I support. We never lost our power. Just like black people, we just never had it and we have to learn and that is okay. When you divide individuals you leave a lot of room for ignorance and misunderstanding but I really believe we are getting it together as a society and just choosing LOVE.
Media does not promote more people getting married or having kids etc your probably looking at the media outside the U.S
@@lifewithbakari1413 Or my algorithm is just different than yours? I see couples all the time plus, I’m Canadian.
are you married?
Why yall have to get brainwashed by whatever the media shows....think for yourselves ffs
@@AngieSmiles123 "Sex is NOT intriguing if I am not receiving safety, stability, consistency and action!" --- if you're a prostitute & want cash for services rendered, just say that lol smh
i align so much with what you are saying. it feels so good to be understood by someone who can translate my thoughts into clear words. thank you lynette for this video!
men & religion been saying this stuff forever. what rock have you been living under. the bible literally tells you to keep your legs closed until marriage. women disobeyed, just like when Eve ate the apple when God told her not to. women do whatever they want, even if its morally corrupt & it takes them years of effing around & finding out before the light bulb comes on & they learn that hookup culture is bad smh
I’ve needed this for so long. Thank you ❤
My favorite TH-camr❤Keep sharing your ideas!
Thank you!
You need to go deeper and be accurate about who's lying to you. Hook-up culture may benefit 1% of men, but it certainly isn't perpetuated by men. The biggest champions of hook-up culture are western women. If anything, "the patriarchy" advocates for traditional roles.
Agree. If hook up culture was beneficial for the majority of men red pill wouldn’t be a thing.
@@bluewave3417You don’t understand what the red pill is. The red pill explains female nature & behaviour. It’s got nothing to do with hookup culture, and it was “made” way before hookup culture was even a thing.
Loved this video ❤. Im 25 as well, almost 26. I went through so much and had to ask God for forgiveness, and to help me so many times. Praying he keeps me strong and not just give my body away to these men that don’t deserve it. I’ve made so many mistakes and had to pay for it , but God protected me always. I’m on my self love journey 💯🤞🏾💕
Greetings Lynette, you appeared today in my YT, it was the first time I've seen your video. Your talk was solid & you were absolutely gorgeous. Wow, your beautiful vibrations were awesome. When you are in your own love frequency, all of the love people appear. Wishing you a beautiful future. Much Gratitude & Much Love
I 💯 % agree with everything you said and am glad someone out there like you is sharing this message. It doesn’t even have to be religiously based for it to make sense. So many women try to convince themselves that they are empowered to sleep with whoever, but deep down, they get hurt when the guy doesn’t treat them with more respect or consideration.
We are not blaming women for men’s bad behaviour. Of course, a man can always choose to be kind, loving and considerate if he is consciously aligned, and this has nothing to do with the choices the woman makes sexually. The message I believe you are (and I am) conveying is that women need to be more discerning about who they sleep with and what the consequences can be thereafter. We need to “qualify” our sexual partners more, because both men and women (but especially women) absorb each other’s energy during and after sex. And if the partner is not coming from a healthy place, you will find yourself entangled in toxic empathy (too much empathy, to the point where you sacrifice your well-being to make excuses for their poor behaviour).
Attachment and hormones are real. Oxytocin gets released with close proximity, not even sex. So having intercourse just intensifies it. I have found from personal experience that I went into casual sex thinking that it would heal me from other past (abusive) partners and that I wouldn’t care about what’s next because it would be surface level, but found myself attached with soul ties that took super long to break, and they only broke after I experienced more toxic treatment from these men.
Thanks for also sharing it’s been a year since you’ve been with someone. For me, it’s been almost 2 years and this time I don’t feel shame. A few years back when I took breaks from sex for my own healing or to ensure I didn’t sleep with the wrong person, I used to feel pressure to just get with someone, and people would joke that I was “wasting away” by not doing it. But now I don’t care what others say because I know my body and soul, and I don’t need to have sex with just anybody to be part of the “cool” club. It’s more important to stay aligned and centred soulfully than it is to have lots of sex to feel worthy for who we inherently are.
Thank you for sharing this insight!!! It’s coming from a place of love, ladies, and no judgment. 💗🦋
You ladies sound like crack addicts when it comes to sleeping around. What you mean take breaks....its never been good, why have you gone back time and time again. Too risky dating women with that history. All it takes is on relapse.
i️ have been feeling like this for quite some time. i️ remember when i️ was in high school we watched Chiraq (Spike Lee’s movie) and there was sooo much protest in the city about it without even watching the movie. when we watched it in class we had a discussion about it and i️ was the only one who truly liked the movie for what it was. women owning their power, not giving men sex to stop the violence in the city. and everybody was just looking at me crazy… i’ve been feeling that way since high school, never played into hookup culture but definitely became a product/victim to it and the need for self validation through sex. i get nervous talking about this topic also because i️ feel alone and judged on this topic and a lot of people get down my throat about this topic. but keep loving yourself and spreading that light throughout this world. 🌹
Girl I 100% share your opinion, you’re not alone 🫶🏾💕✨
@@sourlips_ thank you love!! ❤️
no more sex and divest from all men.... that will stop that small percentage of men wreaking havoc on the city, and your wombs.
You could choose better men though.....but we know that's not happening
Thanks so much for speaking on this. I've definitely participated in hook up culture and its not worth it. I've also been abstinent for up to 11 months, and I was at my happiest during that time. I find that sleeping with someone I have no emotional connection to, don't feel safe with, don't know their true intentions etc really throws me off emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. Not to mention, you then have to think about your health and wellbeing since you don't know for sure what that person may have (even if protection is used). Take care of yourself ladies. And for my younger girls, please protect your wombs and don't give your body to just anyone. Make sure you feel safe, loved, seen, and protected.
This just hits me odd. You make a big deal about being abstinent for 11 months. Most of my guy friends have been abstinent for years. For me it’s been close to a decade. I don’t do hookups, nor do my friends. But we’re the ones who regularly get rejected if we try to date. I’ve bee in 3 long term 10 to 15 year relationships. But finding real relationships today is nearly impossible. My friends all agree. And we all know guys who go through 25, 50, 100+ women a year. And women flock to those guys when we go out. Y’all are saying you want deep, spiritual connections. Where? I don’t see it.
@@interestingtimes6242 I’m not old enough to have three 10-15 year relationships. 😂 And to me, 11 months is long as it’s my personal journey. You know how many people exist in this world??? I assure you there are millions of women that just want true love and a real relationship. I have girl friends in their late 20s that are still virgins and have trouble dating because they meet men who don’t want a long-term committed relationship before getting physical. This isn’t a gender war. A LOT of people are lonely out there largely because of technology, dating apps, and social media. So I think you and your friends need to get rid of that incel mentality and stop playing victim.
great video, was talking about this with my mom the other day. She said as a black woman our people struggle with sexualizing our women. We have to start setting beter examples and explaining these things to gen z and such more in depth.
5:47 nahhh, don't put this on men. When men made your same points, it was s*ut shaming and victim-blaming. It was "you don't get to have an opinion."
I whole heartedly agree. Hookup culture is disgusting 🤢 I just filmed a segment for a video talking about married men womanizing. It grosses me out. Thank you for speaking up! More women need to set standards/boundaries.
Go learn the biology about male sexual strategy, maybe you wouldn't be grossed out about men wanting to spread their seed.
They already done that ,birthrate declining is the women fault
Women are already setting standards/boundaries. Thing is, they only do it when they've already "had their fun"(the hookup culture).
Women should be setting standards/boundaries FROM. DAY. ONE.
Did you film a segment for the married women cheating too?
Womens criteria made it so that unless you look a certain way, absolutely no women want you.
So the men that have been chosen, realise they can have all the candy they want.
You could show them what a good man looks like, but to women, he is the good guy. He just needs to stop cheating...
I agree. The hypersexualizing of Black women has definitely lead to some stereotypes and assumptions that Black women will have sex with anyone. I'm a Black woman and I remember when I was younger dealing with boys and men catcalling me and making assumptions about me. I couldn't stand going out to certain places because I didn't like how people would treat me. You can carry yourself in a respectable manner and still have people make assumptions about you. I believe hookup culture has destroy the dating pool because so many people are looking for someone to fill them when in actuality they need themselves and to learn to be comfortable with themselves.
This video came at the right time. Thank you so much for sharing.. this was such a well put together video as well.
A very small percentage of men benefit from it. The rest of do not
Thank you ! Young lady I am a older lady and I feel the same I have been alone for a few years a it is ok it is ok to be with yourself until some one that you feel and he feels you the same sex is very important and not for every one know your worth❤
Yesss being alone for a while can teach you so much
Loved hearing your thoughts on this!
I conceived my child through hookup culture during covid. I have a lot to learn in dating as well it’s been rough, unpacking my suppressed childhood traumas as they come to light. Grace is the key. Don’t be too hard on yourself but hold yourself accountable.
i literally have to be in love to have sex. blessing and a curse 😂
Why would someone put in all the effort and work to court someone who already gave it to other people for way less, what's the incentive, why would they work harder now for something that is as valuable as it was,
if not less
im so happy you spoke on this!! I couldnt agree with you more.
The thing is women always wait to come to there senses because you would sleep with all bad men they would cheat, abuse, you would give them chance and chance with multiple men and then get older 25 to 30 and realize this isn’t for me and when a good man arrive y’all expect him to be more to preform better than the past men because y’all know he is and you just want to accept you for who you are. When you probably ran through, have kids with another man have trauma and then think you deserve the goodness from a man that did the work I work through my own issues better myself I made the smart decision and women believe they deserve that man and really they do not.
Truth
Actual Factuals👌😂
Lynette. I am so grateful I've came across your video of you going to India because you are my favorite. Thank you for using your platform for promoting good! As a viewer, it is so refreshing to have someone being transparent on social media. Hookup culture has become normalized, and as you mentioned, for women, its negating our primitive spiritual core! Ultimately, I think hookup culture denies what makes femininity so sacred, gentle and pure. Of course, I believe all women should do whatever they want with their bodies. However, I do believe that we got sold a lie (which I fell for for a while) that there is fulfillment in hookup culture.... there is not. Someone is benefitting from it because it IS so heavily pushed in our culture/media, but fuck that shit and don't fall for that crap because you know who isn't benefiting!? US WOMEN. Behind the veil of hookup culture lies the truth that women DO want intimacy and do not want to be tuff on some "I don't need a man!!" which I did for so long. Instead of "I don't need a man" being promoted in our culture, how about we just prioritize finding actual GOOD MEN(they exist), not boys. Men who emulate strength, stability and support into our lives is what I think is worth waiting to find, which I did in my partner, and Im so grateful. I feel like women have grown to hate men because we were looking in all of the wrong places, playing a mans game (hookup culture) and losing - hence making our perception of men more polarized. Instead of the "I dont need men" mentality it should be "I dont engage with losers".
Just my opinion but I loved this video!! Thanks Lynette!!!!!
ily girl thank you so much for speaking on this
Great video! Thank you for sharing your perspective, you spilled absolute facts in this one!
Omg I totally agree I had to soul searching and deleting stuff on IG/ facebook and stuff I mean people. People are more lost then ever and depress and I think bc people need to find GOd again.
I hope the sun shines on you 🌞
I really needed to hear this. Dating has been so exhausting lately and women need to recognize that we are the prize!!!!
You eat, sh1t and sleep like everyone else. You're not above anyone and will not be treated as the prize anymore. The days of simping for a woman's attention will soon be long gone
Women usually do think of themselves as the prize, its men who usually have to proove themselves worthy, career, money, status, physical strength, access to resources etc.
Women think of themselves as the prize. And men no longer view ya as a prize. Ya are not the women of previous generations that were viewed in high regard.
@@bronxishomenomatterwhereig3149 go date men then lol
@@rjflores438 I know this might sound really crazy but I was speaking based on personal experiences! People have different experiences which results in different opinions 🤯.
I love it here!! It’s the consistency for me, i got so much to catch up on that your channel is gona be my treat when im done working on my projects lol. Me and my projector in the darkness 😂
I appreciate you posting this soo much
This generation is cooked. There is no true love at all. literally
It's not a decision to participate in hook up culture that would change how men deal with women, it's a decision not to participate in feminism that would bring that change. Hook up culture is a bi product of feminism. Change has to be dealt with at the root of the problem
No, hook up culture is a product of marketing for and to men. It all started with this 90's 2000's shows like sex in the city that portrayed women being "liberal"... feminism is not about hook up, feminism is about being free to do what you want to do with your life regardless of gender impositions, it's not encouraging women to have sex, it's about not shaming them if they decide to do so or not to do so.
@@TheMotArt Women are the gatekeepers to sex, Men are the gatekeepers to relationships. Nothing and I mean absolutely Nothing can change or remain in the world of sex unless Women authorize it. Without a woman's permission a man cannot have sex with a woman no matter how horny he is. Unless he takes it and at that point he would be a rapist and thrown in prison for a very long time. So my point remains. Through feminism and the woman's ability to now be liberated into making decisions for herself, the Woman chose to enjoy a sexual culture where she could sleep with whoever she wanted when she wanted aka hookup culture. Away with the patriarchy and father's being the gatekeeper to who could sleep with their daughter which he would require marriage first aka shotgun wedding. Nope, with that gone and women free to choose for yourselves you made for yourselves this bed that you won't take accountability for and now have to lay in. So blame men for everything all you want, but you still will have to live in the reality of poor decisions that men were trying to protect you from all along
I love seeing other young women like you, come to these realizations. It can clear up a lot of romantic misfortunes by knowing these things. Thank you for putting your voice out there because I truly believe it has to come from us. Being a black woman as well, we certainly need this message in our community. It would heal a lot of issues.
Sometimes listening to women just gets me baffled as to why the simplest facts seem soo big, or you realise them very late in life. Shouldn't you know that having sex with too many people will have negative consequences on you as a woman??
Sooo true. Their fathers should’ve told them that long time ago😂😂😂
@@Fullyclaimed most of them never had active fathers to begin with
@@djgamingdragon969Most of them definitely did have active fathers, they just didn’t care to listen, or called him controlling.
Women don’t want to hear stuff if it doesn’t make them feel good. Their feelings always come first, and if all the other girls are doing it, you can bet your life savings that they will be too. Sheep.
as a woman? wdym lmao are the men supposed to sleep w each other? furthermore the thing you said baffles you isnt a women thing. sometimes people take time to learn things... & yes crimes are bad and yet men still commit most of them why? right. things arent always black n white 💀
Spot on ~ you gorgeous creature you! I am in my sixties and witnessed the culture shift and the spirit dying. Love yourself and restrict your contact with negative energy, please!
As a man who’s been participating in hook up culture from like 20-25 (now) (due to the idea of “I’m a man I’m only good for sex and providing”) everything you’re saying is facts for both sides. I wasn’t built for it, It hurt me more than it helped mentally, and I decided to cut out everything for the past year and only recently gotten into a relationship and it’s been the happiest I’ve ever been both romantically and sexually. This is what actually feels fulfilling. Do what you feel your heart desires.
Bet you got a damn virgin after you ruined how many lives...