Don't mind my minor typo... ): Make sure you subscribe so that you don’t miss it when I upload episode 3 tomorrow! Watch the BTS here: th-cam.com/video/JuOJDfe3FVs/w-d-xo.html
I never actively chose men to crush on, I was way way more passive than that. I would literally wait around for the first man who showed interest and be like "well I guess this is happening now" and just let them do whatever if that makes sense? Obviously this got me into some, um, unpleasant situations. But this passivity allowed me to relinquish responsibility of my own sexuality and place it in someone else's hands.
Omg yes 😂 this is how I got into my first and second relationship…. And come to think of it third relationship…. And by relationship I mean weeks because I’d get bored 😑 (apart from the second one that was a few months). Not to say I don’t crush on men but they tend to be ✨unavailable✨
yeah i genuinely did enjoy sex with my boyfriend, but I wasn’t attracted to his body and I couldn’t look at him for long, especially below the belt. It felt good physically when he touched me in certain ways (just like your own hand i guess) and I found beauty in the vulnerability and mutual euphoria we could give each other. So I THOUGHT i was attracted to him. But the attraction wasn’t there ??? idk if that makes sense but idk. I was sexually abused so I feel like that also set me up for a pretty broken view on sex and intimacy
Savonne Pearson OKAY GOOD I felt so weird and confused about it because most closeted lesbians i knew just simply hated sex altogether. i did feel some discomfort and repulsion as well looking back but i associated it with pleasure because again, my traumas sort of made sex intertwined with pain and discomfort. but that’s such a relief to hear that i’m not alone in that😅
Omg, I just said a few weeks ago before coming to terms with being gay "I don't really go for looks with guys, it's about their personality." Why tf did I lie like that?🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Y'know what kills me about finally moving from bisexuality and settling into lesbianism -- I was never attracted to men. Like, if everyone had a crush on someone I'd just roll with them to fit in lol. I have two very specific situations where this happened. I never liked anyone on my own accord. I rarely have crushes to begin with so this was easy to keep track off. Celebs don't count and even if they did it's... eh. It's like admiring a flower. Yeah it's pretty but do I want to be in any kind of sexual/romantic relationship with a plant? No! I should've known y'know? I couldn't even bring myself to being in a relationship/intimate with a man. And boy did I try, for years. Every year there'd be a list of characters and I'd try getting to know them better or learn to love them but it never happened. I used to wonder if something was wrong with me. Did I have some undiagnosed trauma or an underlying fear? Then I realized I shouldn't have to work so hard. Attraction is natural and easy. Not something that you have to put thought into. It just is. Sometimes I wonder how lesbians even got that far when I could barely even dip my toes into it lol. (not trying to discredit anyone and their experiences. i'm just saying for me it seemed so obvious yet i didn't fully come out to myself till i was 20/21.)
definitely agree with what u said about celebrities. Like i admire them like a work of art if that makes sense. like its pretty and can make me feel shit sometimes but you cant really be intimate with a painting
It's so weird seeing this, and seeing just how much of it I relate with. I've known for a long time that I'm attracted to women for sure, but comparing this to my feelings about (and experiences with) men, I am shooketh 😂
I had this mental list in my head of the type of guy I would be attracted to and it was actually based on societal expectations. I met a guy that I never even thought was attractive but once I realized he had those traits, he suddenly became attractive to me. But as I got to know him, I realized that he didn't have all the traits and also the ones he had, wasn't even that attarctive to me in reality. Even though I knew I didn't like him and never wanted to date him, I still thought some part of me I wasn't aware of liked him so I stayed. I now realize I was obsessed with finding a guy that I liked and since he was the only one that came close, I tried to force it.
Daisy Flower yes definitely, that’s real. I’ve done something similar. Sometimes for me, I would force myself to like the guy that liked me because it was just easiest.
"My attraction to men was more personality-based." THANK YOU FOR THIS! This is the reason why I still question whether or not I'm a lesbian even after reading the masterdoc and relating to 80% of the content and being completely aware of the fact that I am absolutely grossed out by dicks. It's always like "but we get along so well I think I could date him, so I can't be a lesbian". But the view of a dick makes you wanna throw up! You still wouldn't want to have sex with him! Wake up!
I found the master doc last year on reddit (and shortly after my ex husband and I decided to separate). But it’s really cool seeing this in video format and hearing your discussion on it!!
The closing eyes thing! I had no idea that that was unusual. Even if I was getting it from behind I would close my eyes. Why?? I guess I was trying to dissociate in a way. But it wasn't until my daughter stopped me during a convo and said "Wait, you close your eyes?! Like, the whole time??" and I was just like, duh yeah. She said I don't think that's typical. SO I looked it up and sure enough, it's not! WTH?!
I've recently figured out that I might be a lesbian when I thought that I was 'straight'. I actually developed feelings and attraction to a close female friend and I guess thats when I figured out that I like girls. My feelings for her made me remember all the fruity things I did growing up lol. And yes I have been attracted to guys in the past...its like I was attracted to them but at the same time I wasn't... I kept finding flaws and saying they weren't physically attractive behind their backs .I liked the attention I got from them more than I actually liked them. All the guys I've talked to in the past I only talked to them cause they shot their shot and I liked the attention. And yeah there are a few male celebs I admire to this day like Harry Styles and if a man is attractive I'll admit it. But since realizing that I like girls I have no desire to be with a man. I want to marry a woman. I tried experimenting by talking to women and guys at the same time and yeah I prefer women. I love women. I'm queer.
the sexual intimacy bit! when i had a crush(?) on this boy i met at a friend’s birthday party. he was pretty angsty and by himself majority of the time which drew me to him at first. about a year after said party he hit me up on my dms and just started talking to me. i saw him more in a friend light since he was really cool! but one day i messed up and wanted to hang for his birthday but he said we’d be alone. mind you it was our first time hanging out anyway so by ourselves made me go like WAAAIITTTT lmao but he forced it and my parents let me go. he ended up asking for nudes a lot, wanting to kiss on me and stuff and i kept saying no. i wanted to please him though so eventually that day i did..i hated it. i was happy for my first kiss but not with him, you know? i wanted to save that kiss for someone else so bad but UGH i ruined it. and yeah..he turned out to be weird and passive aggressive too smh
Thanks for sharing your experiences. Your experiences and feelings sound so much like mine and I feel like I'm just starting to confront and deconstruct this part of myself. I'm a lesbian and it feels good to accept that. Oh my goodness.
Your videos are giving me life! I will always remember the time a guy said he loved me during sex and I broke up with him the next day lmao. I have never been dryer in my whole life
Don't you worry, you are not alone to have behaved quite abruptly towards men when the level of intensity in relationships became too high, too personal and awkward. I thought at first that maybe I was maybe too demanding but as it turned out, I wasn't into them the way I was into women.
my god, I just saw one of your videos and subscribed. then I see lesbian topic so I click RIGHT AWAY. i'm actually struggling with coming out as lesbian and these series are so relatable and they help so much. thankss
I’m 6 mins in and had to pause cause I need to know if anyone else experienced this. This is gonna be long I tend to ramble I’m sorry in advance... so when I would find a guy who checked my boxes of what I thought was good enough to date I literally wanted someone who listens to the same music as me had light eyes was smart sweet or at least seemed sweet and was conventionally attractive or at least decent enough that I felt comfortable enough to kiss them. Now this may be a me thing but I have always been insecure. (Stemming from being bullied) and mind you this is back in highschool and probably early college (when I met my ex of 5 yrs we’ll get into later) but when a guy would tik my boxes I’d all of a sudden start to cling on to them thinking in my head no one else would wanna date me and I’m a loser if I don’t have a bf. I would literally obsess and become crazy and obsess over these guys maybe a week before I didn’t give a shit about and looking back it wasn’t that I actually gave a shit about the guy it was just they were decent looking and ticked the boxes and I was terrified to be alone. This is the thing idk why but I had this horrible irrational fear of being alone. Partly I think my mom going through menopause at 34. I think her telling me that made even 15 yr old me think I’m in highschool now I have to find a man I have to get married and have kids when I get out of highschool cause I don’t wanna miss that opportunity to have a kid. Something I knew I always wanted. I think that nagging fear of never having a child ruled my life. Honestly it wasn’t till I was married and had my son at 24 that that fear was finally gone and after me and my now ex husband ( told you we’d get back to the 5 yr relationship it was extremely toxic.) and I spilt at 27 that I had the time to be alone when I was I realized hey maybe I’m not straight.. I just turned 30 on the 4th so like 2 days ago and I’m still working on figuring out who I am and what I’m into cause it’s been a long journey but I was just curious if anyone else had felt something similar..? I know ramble a lot but if you got through this and we’re able to understand I’d love to hear your thoughts.
I wasn’t as guy crazy as yoy describe, but I think I remember just wanting a boyfriend, someone to take care of me. My first boyfriend. I actually wasn’t even interested in him. He was interested in me and I was like heck yea I want a boyfriend. Lol that didn’t last long though I’m 21 and have been questioning on and off for years. I’ve taken quizzes. I’ve looked up am I a lesbian more than I could count. I’m still confused dude idk :( i don’t think I’ve been clingy with guys. Looking back a lot of the time I dated it was just because the guy was interested in me. I wasn’t necessarily into them but i wanted a relationship like all my friends had so.....
I feel like I had a pretty similar experience. I didn't necessarily have high standards for the men I dated, I dated whoever showed me interest. But the reason I did that was because I had that same fear of being alone, being in a relationship made me feel "secure" (more like a false security). I also felt very scared that my biological clock would run out and so I was fixated on finding a man to spend the rest of my life with. This lead me into a nearly 6 year relationship with a man who I was engaged to until I finally broke it off because I realized that I'm lesbian.
I know this comment was forever ago but I just wanted to tell you that I am literally going through this right now. My son is almost 2 and I am realizing that I am probably not bi like I thought. Not sure if lesbian is a fit but I have no clue how to navigate any of this! AHH!!
For me I had absolutely no standard for guys, I would date anyone who showed interest in me, or legit just any guy that was my friend. I would also break it off really easily. I think it's because I really idealized romantic relationships that I found in the media (straight couples ofc), but also because I believed I was worthy only if I was in a relationship. It's gotten a lot better now since I've broken off my most recent toxic relationship with a man. It's also now that I'm truly realizing I might be gay. I feel like I used to say yes to men often because I believed I needed validation from them. Comphet at its finest.
I related the most with the chore thing but the part where you said: “nitpick reasons why you don’t want to be with someone” applies to women too for me 😆 I think my attraction to women is genuine but I’m afraid of intimacy and trust so YAYY
I was obsessed with this male celeb some months ago (or so I thought). I tried imagining him doing the dirty with me and it was HORRIBLE. Like it was just not working🕴
I enjoyed the few videos you uploaded. Wish I had this when I was a pre-teen. When I was a kid I didn’t know what lgbtq 🏳️🌈 was. I remember my girl cousins and I as kids talking about getting married. The first words I said was my husband and I would need counseling. My girl cousins curious with their questions asking why. I said that it would be weird him hugging me in the same bed. That him and I would need counseling. None of them were concerned about that. As I became a pre-teen I envisioned myself being a guy, because I liked the attention my guy cousins got from girls. I dressed with baggy clothes and a low ponytail to hide anything feminine about me, because my curves formed. Plus I felt comfortable in that. I had crushes on guys because they’re attractive, but I think they were attractive in a sense that I wanted to be like them, because I knew boys and girls were supposed to be together growing up in a religious family. Until I saw my first girl on girl relationship in 7th grade. I said oh wow so I don’t need a sex change! Lol In high school I had major crushes on girls. I would flirt just enough without people guessing. Only thing is I had a lot of guys that wanted to date me. I was flattered, but no. At that time I did a 360 dressing femme, because my mom instilled fear in me how people wouldn’t like or want to be around me knowing that I like girls. So I had to play a role in public honestly. I tried talking with this one guy, but I was so annoyed. I always saw guys as just friends that I play basketball and joke with; oh yeah video games. So I didn’t want to string him along. I gave him that “it’s not you, it’s me” line. That’s around the time I met this girl that I felt so comfortable with. We talked about everything & instantly she became my close friend. I invited her with my friend group and she hit it off well with them. That next year as a senior her & I became really close. We joked around calling each other babe and we got pretend married under a stair case. So everyone knew our joke that she’s my pretend wifey. I ended up catching feelings. Had to come clean with her. She was the first friend I came out to. Surprisingly she said oh wow I had a crush on you since the day you introduced yourself to me. Here I was thinking after high school I’m going to a college far from home to live my truth and here she is. Well 11 years later we’re married with kids and our fur babies. I ditched all my feminine clothing and traded it in for button down shirt and tie. My mom said I just couldn’t keep you from wearing guy clothes. So I never had to be intimate with a guy. I just never felt comfortable. It was so foreign to me. Guess I knew all along since I was a kid. Oh yeah the guy who I tried dating well my wife and I bumped into him at a Halloween Costume event and the line was true. He saw oh it really was you not me. Awkward!
Ooof I am Confused, because I do seem to be attracted to long haired men only (preferably with beards, the right height, build, and personality etc etc.) And also masculine looking women as long as they're nice (but I also have crushes on very feminine mostly dark haired celebrities) And guess who's been avoiding dating for the past 2 years by saying (To my family who don't know I'm even considering the idea of being gay in any way) "He's gotta basically be the Messiah for me to consider it at all". I repress my emotions a bunch, but I feel so fraudulent claiming any identity, straight, Bi, or Lesbian. I've gone with bi for several years but it's always felt a little wrong, or dishonest. Jesus lord help
I kind of had a mental list for potential boyfriends but it was more like okay I guess have a crush on that dude but as soon as I found any "no-gos" (and I found them very quickly) I would be like nah I mean don't wanna pressure myself into anything..lol
Well damn I've been questioning my sexuality lately and almost all of these were accurate :') Maybe I'll just have to accept the fact that men ain't it
Don't mind my minor typo... ):
Make sure you subscribe so that you don’t miss it when I upload episode 3 tomorrow!
Watch the BTS here:
th-cam.com/video/JuOJDfe3FVs/w-d-xo.html
thank you so much for this series. My adhd can't focus on reading it myself beacuse the doc scares me a little mentally, but you two make me feel safe
I never actively chose men to crush on, I was way way more passive than that. I would literally wait around for the first man who showed interest and be like "well I guess this is happening now" and just let them do whatever if that makes sense? Obviously this got me into some, um, unpleasant situations. But this passivity allowed me to relinquish responsibility of my own sexuality and place it in someone else's hands.
Omg yes 😂 this is how I got into my first and second relationship…. And come to think of it third relationship…. And by relationship I mean weeks because I’d get bored 😑 (apart from the second one that was a few months). Not to say I don’t crush on men but they tend to be ✨unavailable✨
yeah i genuinely did enjoy sex with my boyfriend, but I wasn’t attracted to his body and I couldn’t look at him for long, especially below the belt. It felt good physically when he touched me in certain ways (just like your own hand i guess) and I found beauty in the vulnerability and mutual euphoria we could give each other. So I THOUGHT i was attracted to him. But the attraction wasn’t there ??? idk if that makes sense but idk. I was sexually abused so I feel like that also set me up for a pretty broken view on sex and intimacy
I relate SO much to everything you’re saying
Savonne Pearson OKAY GOOD I felt so weird and confused about it because most closeted lesbians i knew just simply hated sex altogether. i did feel some discomfort and repulsion as well looking back but i associated it with pleasure because again, my traumas sort of made sex intertwined with pain and discomfort. but that’s such a relief to hear that i’m not alone in that😅
I relate to this as I was also sexually abused. I legit thought I just had a problem with sex lol
I relate so much to this comment it's crazy
Omg, I just said a few weeks ago before coming to terms with being gay "I don't really go for looks with guys, it's about their personality." Why tf did I lie like that?🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Well I have the same with women, not their looks but their personality. Does that mean I'm straight? I don't think so XD
Y'know what kills me about finally moving from bisexuality and settling into lesbianism -- I was never attracted to men. Like, if everyone had a crush on someone I'd just roll with them to fit in lol. I have two very specific situations where this happened. I never liked anyone on my own accord. I rarely have crushes to begin with so this was easy to keep track off. Celebs don't count and even if they did it's... eh. It's like admiring a flower. Yeah it's pretty but do I want to be in any kind of sexual/romantic relationship with a plant? No!
I should've known y'know? I couldn't even bring myself to being in a relationship/intimate with a man. And boy did I try, for years. Every year there'd be a list of characters and I'd try getting to know them better or learn to love them but it never happened. I used to wonder if something was wrong with me. Did I have some undiagnosed trauma or an underlying fear? Then I realized I shouldn't have to work so hard. Attraction is natural and easy. Not something that you have to put thought into. It just is.
Sometimes I wonder how lesbians even got that far when I could barely even dip my toes into it lol. (not trying to discredit anyone and their experiences. i'm just saying for me it seemed so obvious yet i didn't fully come out to myself till i was 20/21.)
definitely agree with what u said about celebrities. Like i admire them like a work of art if that makes sense. like its pretty and can make me feel shit sometimes but you cant really be intimate with a painting
It's so weird seeing this, and seeing just how much of it I relate with. I've known for a long time that I'm attracted to women for sure, but comparing this to my feelings about (and experiences with) men, I am shooketh 😂
Abagail Billedeaux ooooh girl yesss that’s how I felt too! It’s super eye opening
LIVE YA LIFE THIS THW ONLY ONE U WILL GET.
I had this mental list in my head of the type of guy I would be attracted to and it was actually based on societal expectations. I met a guy that I never even thought was attractive but once I realized he had those traits, he suddenly became attractive to me. But as I got to know him, I realized that he didn't have all the traits and also the ones he had, wasn't even that attarctive to me in reality. Even though I knew I didn't like him and never wanted to date him, I still thought some part of me I wasn't aware of liked him so I stayed. I now realize I was obsessed with finding a guy that I liked and since he was the only one that came close, I tried to force it.
Daisy Flower yes definitely, that’s real. I’ve done something similar. Sometimes for me, I would force myself to like the guy that liked me because it was just easiest.
Lmaoo “I can open my eyes” 😂😂
THIS WAS SO RELATABLE
"My attraction to men was more personality-based." THANK YOU FOR THIS! This is the reason why I still question whether or not I'm a lesbian even after reading the masterdoc and relating to 80% of the content and being completely aware of the fact that I am absolutely grossed out by dicks. It's always like "but we get along so well I think I could date him, so I can't be a lesbian". But the view of a dick makes you wanna throw up! You still wouldn't want to have sex with him! Wake up!
I am pretty securely bi, but I still found this really interesting! Thanks for posting
same
I found the master doc last year on reddit (and shortly after my ex husband and I decided to separate). But it’s really cool seeing this in video format and hearing your discussion on it!!
The closing eyes thing! I had no idea that that was unusual. Even if I was getting it from behind I would close my eyes. Why?? I guess I was trying to dissociate in a way. But it wasn't until my daughter stopped me during a convo and said "Wait, you close your eyes?! Like, the whole time??" and I was just like, duh yeah. She said I don't think that's typical. SO I looked it up and sure enough, it's not! WTH?!
I've recently figured out that I might be a lesbian when I thought that I was 'straight'. I actually developed feelings and attraction to a close female friend and I guess thats when I figured out that I like girls. My feelings for her made me remember all the fruity things I did growing up lol. And yes I have been attracted to guys in the past...its like I was attracted to them but at the same time I wasn't... I kept finding flaws and saying they weren't physically attractive behind their backs .I liked the attention I got from them more than I actually liked them. All the guys I've talked to in the past I only talked to them cause they shot their shot and I liked the attention. And yeah there are a few male celebs I admire to this day like Harry Styles and if a man is attractive I'll admit it. But since realizing that I like girls I have no desire to be with a man. I want to marry a woman. I tried experimenting by talking to women and guys at the same time and yeah I prefer women. I love women. I'm queer.
the sexual intimacy bit! when i had a crush(?) on this boy i met at a friend’s birthday party. he was pretty angsty and by himself majority of the time which drew me to him at first. about a year after said party he hit me up on my dms and just started talking to me. i saw him more in a friend light since he was really cool! but one day i messed up and wanted to hang for his birthday but he said we’d be alone. mind you it was our first time hanging out anyway so by ourselves made me go like WAAAIITTTT lmao but he forced it and my parents let me go. he ended up asking for nudes a lot, wanting to kiss on me and stuff and i kept saying no. i wanted to please him though so eventually that day i did..i hated it. i was happy for my first kiss but not with him, you know? i wanted to save that kiss for someone else so bad but UGH i ruined it. and yeah..he turned out to be weird and passive aggressive too smh
Thanks for sharing your experiences. Your experiences and feelings sound so much like mine and I feel like I'm just starting to confront and deconstruct this part of myself. I'm a lesbian and it feels good to accept that. Oh my goodness.
Your videos are giving me life! I will always remember the time a guy said he loved me during sex and I broke up with him the next day lmao. I have never been dryer in my whole life
jellyrcw12 AHAHAHA
@@SavonnePearson I STILL think about it sometimes lol
Don't you worry, you are not alone to have behaved quite abruptly towards men when the level of intensity in relationships became too high, too personal and awkward.
I thought at first that maybe I was maybe too demanding but as it turned out, I wasn't into them the way I was into women.
omfg hahahagagagaggahaha
my god, I just saw one of your videos and subscribed. then I see lesbian topic so I click RIGHT AWAY. i'm actually struggling with coming out as lesbian and these series are so relatable and they help so much. thankss
I’m 6 mins in and had to pause cause I need to know if anyone else experienced this. This is gonna be long I tend to ramble I’m sorry in advance... so when I would find a guy who checked my boxes of what I thought was good enough to date I literally wanted someone who listens to the same music as me had light eyes was smart sweet or at least seemed sweet and was conventionally attractive or at least decent enough that I felt comfortable enough to kiss them. Now this may be a me thing but I have always been insecure. (Stemming from being bullied) and mind you this is back in highschool and probably early college (when I met my ex of 5 yrs we’ll get into later) but when a guy would tik my boxes I’d all of a sudden start to cling on to them thinking in my head no one else would wanna date me and I’m a loser if I don’t have a bf. I would literally obsess and become crazy and obsess over these guys maybe a week before I didn’t give a shit about and looking back it wasn’t that I actually gave a shit about the guy it was just they were decent looking and ticked the boxes and I was terrified to be alone. This is the thing idk why but I had this horrible irrational fear of being alone. Partly I think my mom going through menopause at 34. I think her telling me that made even 15 yr old me think I’m in highschool now I have to find a man I have to get married and have kids when I get out of highschool cause I don’t wanna miss that opportunity to have a kid. Something I knew I always wanted. I think that nagging fear of never having a child ruled my life. Honestly it wasn’t till I was married and had my son at 24 that that fear was finally gone and after me and my now ex husband ( told you we’d get back to the 5 yr relationship it was extremely toxic.) and I spilt at 27 that I had the time to be alone when I was I realized hey maybe I’m not straight.. I just turned 30 on the 4th so like 2 days ago and I’m still working on figuring out who I am and what I’m into cause it’s been a long journey but I was just curious if anyone else had felt something similar..? I know ramble a lot but if you got through this and we’re able to understand I’d love to hear your thoughts.
I wasn’t as guy crazy as yoy describe, but I think I remember just wanting a boyfriend, someone to take care of me. My first boyfriend. I actually wasn’t even interested in him. He was interested in me and I was like heck yea I want a boyfriend. Lol that didn’t last long though I’m 21 and have been questioning on and off for years. I’ve taken quizzes. I’ve looked up am I a lesbian more than I could count. I’m still confused dude idk :( i don’t think I’ve been clingy with guys. Looking back a lot of the time I dated it was just because the guy was interested in me. I wasn’t necessarily into them but i wanted a relationship like all my friends had so.....
I feel like I had a pretty similar experience. I didn't necessarily have high standards for the men I dated, I dated whoever showed me interest. But the reason I did that was because I had that same fear of being alone, being in a relationship made me feel "secure" (more like a false security). I also felt very scared that my biological clock would run out and so I was fixated on finding a man to spend the rest of my life with. This lead me into a nearly 6 year relationship with a man who I was engaged to until I finally broke it off because I realized that I'm lesbian.
I know this comment was forever ago but I just wanted to tell you that I am literally going through this right now. My son is almost 2 and I am realizing that I am probably not bi like I thought. Not sure if lesbian is a fit but I have no clue how to navigate any of this! AHH!!
For me I had absolutely no standard for guys, I would date anyone who showed interest in me, or legit just any guy that was my friend. I would also break it off really easily. I think it's because I really idealized romantic relationships that I found in the media (straight couples ofc), but also because I believed I was worthy only if I was in a relationship. It's gotten a lot better now since I've broken off my most recent toxic relationship with a man. It's also now that I'm truly realizing I might be gay. I feel like I used to say yes to men often because I believed I needed validation from them. Comphet at its finest.
@@elansimonton1736 idk how I just saw this but I hope you’re figuring it have figured some shit out ❤️❤️
I related the most with the chore thing but the part where you said: “nitpick reasons why you don’t want to be with someone” applies to women too for me 😆
I think my attraction to women is genuine but I’m afraid of intimacy and trust so YAYY
If he pulls off his shirt to flex his muscles and you get nauseated you might be a lesbian💙🌈💙
I was obsessed with this male celeb some months ago (or so I thought). I tried imagining him doing the dirty with me and it was HORRIBLE. Like it was just not working🕴
Thank you SO much for this series. This is validating, I feel like I'm at home
this is so comforting as a confused queer person, thank you lol
I enjoyed the few videos you uploaded. Wish I had this when I was a pre-teen. When I was a kid I didn’t know what lgbtq 🏳️🌈 was. I remember my girl cousins and I as kids talking about getting married. The first words I said was my husband and I would need counseling. My girl cousins curious with their questions asking why. I said that it would be weird him hugging me in the same bed. That him and I would need counseling. None of them were concerned about that.
As I became a pre-teen I envisioned myself being a guy, because I liked the attention my guy cousins got from girls. I dressed with baggy clothes and a low ponytail to hide anything feminine about me, because my curves formed. Plus I felt comfortable in that. I had crushes on guys because they’re attractive, but I think they were attractive in a sense that I wanted to be like them, because I knew boys and girls were supposed to be together growing up in a religious family. Until I saw my first girl on girl relationship in 7th grade. I said oh wow so I don’t need a sex change! Lol
In high school I had major crushes on girls. I would flirt just enough without people guessing. Only thing is I had a lot of guys that wanted to date me. I was flattered, but no. At that time I did a 360 dressing femme, because my mom instilled fear in me how people wouldn’t like or want to be around me knowing that I like girls. So I had to play a role in public honestly. I tried talking with this one guy, but I was so annoyed. I always saw guys as just friends that I play basketball and joke with; oh yeah video games. So I didn’t want to string him along. I gave him that “it’s not you, it’s me” line. That’s around the time I met this girl that I felt so comfortable with. We talked about everything & instantly she became my close friend. I invited her with my friend group and she hit it off well with them. That next year as a senior her & I became really close. We joked around calling each other babe and we got pretend married under a stair case. So everyone knew our joke that she’s my pretend wifey. I ended up catching feelings. Had to come clean with her. She was the first friend I came out to. Surprisingly she said oh wow I had a crush on you since the day you introduced yourself to me. Here I was thinking after high school I’m going to a college far from home to live my truth and here she is. Well 11 years later we’re married with kids and our fur babies. I ditched all my feminine clothing and traded it in for button down shirt and tie. My mom said I just couldn’t keep you from wearing guy clothes.
So I never had to be intimate with a guy. I just never felt comfortable. It was so foreign to me. Guess I knew all along since I was a kid. Oh yeah the guy who I tried dating well my wife and I bumped into him at a Halloween Costume event and the line was true. He saw oh it really was you not me. Awkward!
i just discovered your channel- i love it!
Ooof I am Confused, because I do seem to be attracted to long haired men only (preferably with beards, the right height, build, and personality etc etc.) And also masculine looking women as long as they're nice (but I also have crushes on very feminine mostly dark haired celebrities)
And guess who's been avoiding dating for the past 2 years by saying (To my family who don't know I'm even considering the idea of being gay in any way) "He's gotta basically be the Messiah for me to consider it at all". I repress my emotions a bunch, but I feel so fraudulent claiming any identity, straight, Bi, or Lesbian. I've gone with bi for several years but it's always felt a little wrong, or dishonest. Jesus lord help
#6 sign is true with me. in middle school i had a best friend who started dating this other guy and that’s when i thought i was attracted to him😭
Do I like women or am I just traumatized from previous experiences with men? pfff this is funny in a not funny way
I feel this in my core!
This is great !! I can relate to everything literally.
I kind of had a mental list for potential boyfriends but it was more like okay I guess have a crush on that dude but as soon as I found any "no-gos" (and I found them very quickly) I would be like nah I mean don't wanna pressure myself into anything..lol
Thanks a lot 💛
Found you guys thanks to a girl on tiktok.
Yoon Mini WHATTTTT what’s the tik tok or the username?
Savonne Pearson I cant find it now but if I remember I’ll tell you!!
@@SavonnePearson has a brazilian tiktoker who translated the masterdoc into portuguese and made a playlist in which there are some videos of you
@@SavonnePearson This is her tiktok account @fontenel.le
Does Alysse still have a youtube? The link doesn't work?
Yes! You can search Alysse Samara
Sameeeeee, omg
Well damn I've been questioning my sexuality lately and almost all of these were accurate :') Maybe I'll just have to accept the fact that men ain't it
Are you both sisters?
No we’re not related 😂
@@SavonnePearsonwaw you guys kinda look alike