"If I talk about racism everyone rallies behind me. When I talk about colorism I'm called bitter angry & mad by the same people who was rooting me on when I talked about racism." Faaacts!
Also, deifying is essentially dehumanizing. Like Black women are not “goddesses,” they’re PEOPLE and should be treated as such. And yes, Black women are amazing, but not mythical beings, who should be more humanized, not less.
Yes! This is one of the reasons I find the hard work Black women's hard work that is put in for success is always called, "Black Girl Magic". It's a bit disingenuous to me because being identified as "magical" and "girl" no matter the age is problematic in my opinion.
I usually never talk to men that call me that. Its so masculine sounding. I stay away from that. I notice when I wear my natural hair which is 4C i get called those names alot. BM want warriors but then turn around and claim that we are being too strong. Look at the terms that they say...pls make it make sense 🙄
Mother earth sounds horrible in my oppion because naturally mother nature seems like the king of mother who kind of abuses her kids by doing things like earthquakes she's also a very strong but fearful which kind of isn't the role I want to play considering she plays masculine more scary than most men
They say this to try to pander to us because they know that we are the ones that line their pockets, they know that black women are the ones that go hard for them. I’m so sick of it 🤢
I don’t know how a beautiful woman like you would hate black men. I am getting zaddy vibes. Maybe it’s just that you would like to be with white men because I doubt any black men turned you down.
This whole royalty nonsense is honestly nauseating, not flattering. Disingenuous language has serpent's tongue energy. I've had a black man yell at me, at the top of his lungs, that I " can't be a queen" because I ignored his comments while walking down the street. He then proceeded to say that my " attitude" was the reason "they treat us how they treat us". Two seconds earlier, I was the best thing in the world, tell me how that works?🤦🏿♀️ The same ones that call you queen, empress, goddess, whatever other nonsense, are the first ones to denigrate you. Luckily for me and many other Black women, we really don't care to be praised, just leave us be and get out of our way.
Omg, this has happened to me all of the time. These type of men are easily upset at women who do not feed into their ego. Tbh, I dont make eye contact with BM. And I keep my distance from them. They are always attacking us. Its scary and I dont like it. I avoid them at all costs now.
@@howtodoit4204When y’all stop talking about us wearing weave, lashes and nails. Always bringing up how y’all don’t date black women and white women are better blah blah blah we will do the same. Constantly their are videos of black men disrespecting black women unprovoked sooooo…
I’ve never liked being called queen. I associate queen with respectability and patriarchy, two things that have and continue to cause black women the most harm. Also, I looked into the etymology of the word queen and that solidified my dislike for the term. While I do think black women are the origin of all humanity I am uncomfortable with people who are not bw referring to us a gods. It feels like another means of objectification and dehumanization. The further we are from being seen as simply human, the easier it is to enact violence against us.
What I love about people is their imperfections and the vulnerability that comes with it. I am a romantic at heart. So that whole "queen" "bad bitch" performance of hyper confidence and power makes me really tired. I want us to be embraced for the humans we are, not the perfect strong coldhearted images that are easy to copy.
I am kind of glad these types of men are not dating BW. Nick Cannon seems to be in a race with Future the rapper to create the most illegitimate children in America and Big Sean seems emotionally unavailable and not willing to commit or be faithful so why would BW want to subject themselves to that? All of these are blessings and BW need to recognize that.
Yeah it's always seemed dehumanizing for black women to have to be either a man's abused object or a man's deified object, "his bitch" or "his queen". Either way I'm not appreciated in my full humanity.
yes, i've felt a way about the "queen" thing too especially bcus it lowkey reinforces the desire for hierarchy. i'm not valuable bcus im an important queen or something, im valuable bcus im a human and the point is for no one to be over anyone. + i just recently finished all about love (bell hooks truly was and is amazing) & its really a must read. its def been helping me think more about how im showing up in my life. nnedi okorafor is a nigerian american speculative fiction writer. i've read "binti" and "shuri" by her and it sounds like you'd be into them. binti is like a sci-fi space novel about a girl being the first from her himba community to be accepted into a "prestigious" technology school-spaceship and shuri is a comic book spin-off of black panther with shuri as the main character. i read them in class, but they're great reads!
Ummm, human relationships, like all mammals, fall into heirarchy. Modern women are making things way more complicated than they need to be. Just find a good man and shut up and follow his lead. End of story.
I recently read Binti and it was great, shorter than what I normally read though. It made me feel empowered to be an African young women, in the diaspora it has been hard to embrace my culture. I only started learning to embrace myself last year. By the way, Shuri sounds great I’ll definitely look into it.
@@ITech2005 then if that's the case, then there's a pecking order, and BM moping, trying so hard to get or find the respect that they see of the perpetuated higher order, WM should have THEM shutting the hell up, simple as that right? Based on your ahem "logic", BM keep making things harder than they should be, if they just shut up and accept that they are in a lower human experience compared to that of their male white counterparts, maybe so many of 'em wouldn't die with police scenarios, and paint it as victimhood of "police brutality" and accept that they kept paid less, have different VALUE assessed with their human capital, contribution to society, their bank loans, anything like that. PERHAPS just, well, these men, particularly BM, can STOP being so bitter and taking it out on circumstances that won't change this HIERARCHY?....as you termed it? Righttttt.
One of the things I love about you Mayowa is that no matter the topic youre ALWAYS spitting facts. You're such a great influence in our community for real. Love you lots!
I definitely get your point and hate pandering. I believe as a black woman I use “queen” as a way to show black women I support and love them since we get so much static from the outside world.
By calling Black women goddess’s I think it plays into the superwoman complex. It forces Black women to live up to the standard of perfection when no one is perfect. I personally don’t like being called queen ‘cause it’s corny. I do love being called a god but that’s because I view myself very highly and I deserve to be worshipped. But that’s just me
If you look into myths and legends of global cultures they all show that gods are not infallible, perfect beings who live a perfect existence. Only Christianity does that. You will realize the truth of divinity when you open up the perspective .
First of all you are not God. You are not the creator of the earth or the heavens. Only there is one true creator and that's the Lord Jesus Christ. Stop listening to Lucifer telling you that you are a God, he said, the samething to Eve. An this what made her sin against God. We are not supposed to idolize men or ourselves only give the lord Jesus Christ the glory. So that self glorification you are thinking wrong on that. You are idolizing yourself in which is sinful indeed.
@@femdivinemind7777 It''s the truth. People wants to serve the devil. Well the same God they reject they will be begging to come out of hell while screaming.
I think that Nick Cannon is aware of the optics of his longstanding colorism, so he tried to mitigate it in the workplace by hiring Jessie Woo as a "Wildin' Out Girl" after she called out being let go as the only dark sister. But we still see through you, dude.
1. I'm every mirror she's Black 2. Dear Black Girl 3. One of the good ones 4. Dear Haiti, Love Alaine 5. Clap when you land 6. The Black Kids 7. Act your age, eve brown 8. How the one armed sister sweeps her house 9. Dear Liberte (Haitian focusing on colorism and classism in upscale New York and Haiti set in 1800s)
I bought a "The Black Woman is God" t shirt when I was younger, but could never wear it cause it gave my spirit the same feeling as being called strong. Gross
We’re not magical ! We’re human beings... Smh this is so sad that we are either marginalised / ignored or deifed and dark skin queens !! The lack of representation makes us believe every narrative they put us into. We don’t need to fit into this Queen / goddess movement. Our value is within. We just are, period.
I feel any compliments for dark BW, coming from BM romantically devoted to nonblack/unambiguous women is only pandering. Actions speak louder than words and outside of the help and dark BW of birth, men like this have few dark BW in their personal lives. This pandering is evident by the quick criticism when there are complaints of colorism. But I get it they have to keep their income streams secure.
I'm reading parable of the sower by octavia butler its really amazing. As a person who grew up only reading and listening to fantasy specifically written by white people (unfortunately), reading this has been SOOO refreshing. Its exactly what you were saying about being able see yourself in a book. I highly recommend. Its also intense! just giving you a heads up. Wish I had read more books by brilliant black women like this growing up.
Oh my gosh! I love Octavia! When I was young, I fell in love with sci-fi genre but we were never there…or seen or heard. It wasn’t until I was older and researched. Her work is so important. I believe they are starting a tv show based on one of books. Finally! Lol
Book recommendation: “For Brown Girls with Sharp Edges and Tender Hearts” by: Prisca Dorcas Mojica Rodriguez - changed my whole undergraduate experience
I’ve always disliked being called “queen”. I feel similarly to others who have expressed how dehumanizing it is to be placed on a pedestal and denied access to the fullness of human emotions, needs and desires (all because of a stranger’s projections, at that). As a nonbinary, queer person I’ve also never enjoyed the hetero expectations that come with being seen as a queen.
As a dsbm in America it always seemed weird to hear someone call me a king like you said I'm like everybody can't be kings. I guess I'm more for someone saying I have king like energy? Not sure, but I do love watching your channel! I'm guilty of so much colorism and featurism and grew up not liking my own skin until I was a young adult, so to watch videos like yours is making me very proactive in changing my perspective and actually checking myself. Hearing a new perspective brings awareness and awareness brings change. Keep educating us and pointing out the problems in our psyche!
14:46 I agree. I've always criged whenever I hear people refer to themselves or others as "qween" or "kang" especially when they are not royalty or have anything close to a kingdom. It is very tackly since I often seen it misused for a person that is obviously pandering, agreeing with the majority on a controversial topic or doing/saying the bare minimal for once in their life . This also reminds me of the "high value" "low value" "alpha" "beta" debate.
I understand the sentiments shared in this video. Especially when it comes to putting black women on pedestals, to easily tear them down when they are not living by their standards. Personally I don't mind being referred to as goddess, empress, and queen because of the men in my life see my humanity first and I love that. I had to keep clear of men who haven't healed from societal trauma.
Being called a goddess means they see me as a fantasy and not a real person with problems. I have been told I was a goddess in a discussion to basically minimize any of my problems or concerns. I shouldn't be making something out of nothing cause I'm a goddess that shouldn't concern myself with worldly rights or emotions. I'm not suppose to be like a worldly man that is angry or sad. I tell them it sounds like cult stuff and they are running away from my main point as if calling me goddess would make me stop talking.
This was a very interesting perspective that I have never considered. I usually take those words as compliments because they are so heavily thrown around. It's definitely true that these words can be easily reversed to dehumanize you. I love that this gave me something to think about!!!
you can tell when a person truly sees your divinity. they don't just refer to you as such, they treat you as such... most people only say it on a superficial level... they usually don't even know what it entails to be a divine human so most often than not its just empty words said to invoke a response... & it's usually a response that the speaker doesn't deserve.
Nick has issues, hes spreading his seed like its a challenge, he has money but children need more then that!! I can see where Monique was coming from, I'll wear my bonnet all day in the house but Id never wear it outside, I've got to many head scarfs etc. But you don't know a persons mental state...
I always roll my eyes when BM calls us queens and gods like they’re not worthy of us. I truly believe they really believe this. They don’t think they’re worthy of us. It’s giving self hate.
“A lot of the time the people that want to push you to the front, and act as if, you can be holier than thou or you can be perfect, will be the ones waiting for your fall.” SO GODDAMN TRUE, THIS WAS A SERMON. DAMN. Edit: I’ve also noticed a LOT that I’m held to the most ridiculous standards especially in the work place as a black woman. It’s so suffocating.
The work place is the worst! We get paid the least, have to work the hardest, and they still expect us to swallow the BS microaggressions and accept more work and pick up the slack of others.......and don't ask for a raise - you'll get let go...
@@blaqobsydian44 the fact you can do that I'm jealous (not envious or negative)!!! I wish that I could but one day I will and YES I will not look back!! I love that for you, for us!! Stay strong!!
@@nicolerichardson1080 thank you, I pray one day (sooner than you think), you can just say “peace out” and walk away from the toxicity. Take care and protect your energy at all costs Sis.
Octavia Butler is a must read if your interested in Sci-if or Speculative writing. She's not consider a Fantasy writer, however her work is highly imaginative and empowering. Octavia Butler changed my life and inspired me to read, periodt! Tananarive Due is another Sci-if/Speculative writer whose work is AMAZING! The Blood series will have your mind blown.
@@osazuwademiirowa-omoregie2500 ❤ I definitely enjoyed her Parables series. I need to reread her whole catalogue. I loved Lilith's Brood and the Wild Seed series just inspired me so much.
I don't like when people call black women queens and goddesses either. We're not either of those. We're just WOMEN! Just call us WOMEN! Also, these black men like Nick Cannon and Big Sean only say that stuff about black women because they are fully aware of being called colorist by black women. So, they try to pander to get back on black women's good side without doing the actual work. They go out of their way to not date black women, but want to call us queens and Gods? 🙄
I am always excited to see you play with makeup. So few of us feel free and confident enough to experiment publicly. At most we may dabble behind closed doors.
Also totally agree most of the time the same people who put others on pedestals are the first people to tear them right back down. Or try to put them "in a box" or "their place".
“Trying to hit a soft spot” but not trying to treat us like human beings LOL. We are not ethereal in the sense that we don’t exist.....we’re human beings . Treat us with respect. Everyone hates black women so much. What did we do to y’all?
The first sci-fi/fantasy book I read was in college. It was by black author Octavia Butler. Her whole catalog is good, although I am not a fan of Kindred. Since then (late 90s/early 00s) I have discovered many black authors writing in this genre and I love all of them. Nnedi Okorafor, N.K. Jemison, and Nalo Hopkinson are great authors. Lots of trilogies and stand alones. Red Wolf Black Leopard by Marlon James is a page turner. For younger children, the Tristan Strong trilogy by Kwame Mbalia and The Jumbies by Tracey Baptiste. I enjoy audiobook versions. Read by excellent voice actors and with varied accents, makes the stories come to life even more for me.
Your mind; You talked about the binary of gods and demons, colonialism and monarchies, colorism and misogynoir. Thank you so much for this! Also, a sci-fi book I recommend that is written and about dark skin people is Kindred by Octavia Butler 💜💛
This guy that I dealt with stated that BW are Gods yet he wanted to be in a polygamous relationship in order for the income to be greater. Historically polygamy was practiced among the royal and with the man as the sole provider. So the guy that I dealt with wanted women to provide yet you refer to them as Gods…so why not serve them?
After hearing your thoughts on Queendom/Kingdom/Deifying, I started to think “what do I mean or feel when I use such terms.” And I don’t feel like what I imagine has much likeness to the traditional meanings. I think I’m acknowledging the light I see in people. I guess I don’t really see them as ruling others, but ruling their own being, if that makes any sense. Now I really wonder what others imagine or mean when they use queen/king/god. 🤔
All this stems from colorism. BM do like BW just anyone on the lighter side of the spectrum to date. You will see lighter skin women becoming wives quickly versus someone darker skin. Most BM are colostruck when it comes to who they date. I have seen them sleep with dark and marry light. But will call the dark woman "Queen" but wont marry her Make it make sense. Many BM see light skin as currency that explains why so many darker skin women are single because BM are not choosing them. Im so glad that more and more ppl are talking about colorism because it plays a huge part in a persons dating experience and how they see the world. BM do not call each other out when guys diss darker skin women.
How do I feel about people calling themselves Queen or Goddesses? You are whatever you say you are. It's not hurting anyone 🤣😅 About the guys who don't date BW... We are vindicated about the destruction of the BC. Now, the world sees who and what the real problem is.
I have three older sisters who are black women and they say they don’t like being called Queen either💀 I’ve noticed when guys compliment non black women they’ll say they’re beautiful, gorgeous, lovely, but all black women get called Queen, like that’s the one compliment that’s allowed for all black women
You would absolutely LOVE This Poison Heart by Kaylynn Bayron! It's a fantasy book with black queer people as characters and is about botanity, magic and greek mythology. I wish i could read it for the 1st time again. I probably read it out within a week or two
You should check out authors Rivers Solomon and Akwaeke Emezi. Also, if you like Children of Blood & Bone you may like the Raybearer series by Jordan Ifueko. There is some really amazing black written fantasy these days.
i have been BINGE-ING talks/interviews with bell hooks. I read/listen to a few chapters of "All About Love" every single day its been changing my life. It's also been pushing me to get back into reading. its wild how each upload from you somewhat aligns with where I am in my life journey because I have that book in my cart right now! I know this isn't from a Black author, but I'm working on acquiring more books as I get back into my Book-bag as well lol. But, another FANTASTIC fantasy book I just finished is "Iron Widow" by Xiran Jay Zhao. It's a historical sci-fi and the story rocked my world a little, ngl. I highly recommend it! I hope to share more recommendations from Black authors in the future Thank you for this video
Check out Legendborn! The protagonist is clearly darkskinned and the story is great. I can’t say if I’d classify the author as dark skinned but I believe it touches on colorism and has amazing value as a piece of black fantasy literature. It’s one of the books I wish I had when I was a teen trying to enjoy fiction before people cared about representation.
I admire the fact that you as a Dark beautiful woman speak on it with confidence don't be gas lit by those who are too coward to speak on it . Speak even louder over those who try to gas light your conversation. Love your show sister and a world of blessings and prosperity.
I feel you Mayowa. When we say these things like, we are gods, I believe you are in essence striving for an unattainable status and therefore unachievable goal. I totally agree with idolizing a person can quickly turn to demonizing them. You see it all the time. Travis Scott demonized but Drake avoided the heat. And I believe that to be true because it’s superficial love or admiration. It’s superficial when you say black women are gods but all you do is date mixed race. Because like you said your doing it because it’s the trendy thing to do for the time being. Just like all these businesses promoting “blackness”. Love your content and you!!! ❤️
YES YES YES. everything you said 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 whew. and to your closing question, i HATE being called Queen. im nonbinary and dont identify with traditionally feminine terms, so thats one. but even when i was cisgender i hated it. i agree with everything you said. seeing me as a “Queen” is their projection, and the second i exist outside of what their idea of being a “Queen” is, im vilified.
I just finished Children of Virtue and Vengeance (it's a sequel to Children of Blood and Bone) and it was truly AMAZING!!! Tomi Adeyemi's writing is SO beautiful!!
That's one of my favorite books! I'm a big fantasy reader in general but Children of Blood and Bone is in my top ten favorites. I would also recommend Raybearer by Jordan Ifueko. Amazing worldbuilding. Ifueko a Nigerian-American and Raybearer draws a lot of inspiration from Nigerian mythology.
13:00 I hear that 💯 It's like how a vid of white professors talking about colonialism from a "progressive" stance goes viral, but people don't/didn't listen when we've been saying it from an anti-colonial perspective before them
Even in the Bible the dragon, the evil one would come for the woman! The no 1 woman still is de BLACK WOMAN! So this movie makers, these devils children are doing what is written and prophesied!!
My ex was a dark skin colorist. He used to call me queen just to try to play me 😬 it was creepy but I tried to go along with it. I was the darkest women he ever dated too. Smh I've dealt with that too many times...
On the topics of books, I started reading a book of short stories called Between Two Seas by Cerece Rennie Murphy. It's a light read but interesting and easy to get into. I've been enjoying it so far
yes the whole Black women are God and all powerful takes away from their humanity and that is very problematic. I howled with laughter so hard when Nick cannon and Sean clips started playin. these guys totally don't mean what they say 🤣🤣
Your hair is so thick sis. There have been times that I tried to comb (finger or pick detangle) my thick type 4 hair and just cried: That was before I learned drenching my hair with dechlorinated water is the key.
It's probably been mentioned but yeah, I think one definite downside to the "queen" moniker is that people will then use it to say "oh well you can't have had it that bad if you're a QUEEN," thusly they'll opt to diminish the magnitude of suffering black women have endured for centuries and continue to endure.
I was recently having a conversation with my coworkers, who are non-Black people, about race relations and how we can't stand the division in the media. I mentioned how I feel like my Blackness is magnified as a "special difference" in the media so much that non-Black people often behave unnaturally around me as if they are going out of their way to not offend me, less they be seen as racist. I told them point blank, that the best way they can prove that they mean well to me and see me as an equal is to treat me as if I look just like them. I told them to think of me as the same born and raised American that they are. I don't think someone is racist until they exhibit racism. Something amazing happened that day. For the first time in my life, when I am with those people, I don't feel different. We are totally relaxed around each other and have conversations about everything. We laugh hard with each other and joke around about "controversial topics" and pick each other's brains about things. We comfort each other during sad times and encourage each other. I don't feel Black around them. I feel like myself and they enjoy my company and show respect to me the same way I do them. I don't have to question if they are judging me based on my race whenever I make mistakes, that is a freeing realization. All of the awkwardness disappeared the day I voiced those words. Americans need to remember that we are one nation. We should be acting and thinking like one. We are each other's countrymen first and foremost. If we don't have each other's backs then who will? We are each other's people. Every single state in this country is full of Americans and Americans come in all shapes sizes and colors. In all the years this country has existed, Americans have interbred so much with each other that most family trees are not single race. We are trying so hard to divide ourselves while demanding to be treated like a member of the collective American population. How can we be divided and a collective at the same time? I know that I may get some negativity from this by separatists but I don't think I am wrong to want all Americans to be a cohesive nation. Divided we fall. Race relations is our weakness point and they are pressing it hard because we keep letting it work on us. That's what the powers that be want to accomplish to keep control. Keep us broken and distrustful so that we don't join up and overthrow the evil that is classist hierarchy.
I really really appreciate videos like this so much. Its really hard to meet people that understand these concepts and this is what we need. Please never stop making videos!!!
I am a new subscriber and I want to take the time to let you know how much I love your content. I’m currently binge watching and learning so much. You are giving me language to put to so many things that I have lived throughout my 36 years of life as a dark skinned black woman. I want to thank you for taking the time to make these videos and for voicing your opinion. I am here for EVERYTHING! The beautiful thick locs, the gorgeous dark skin and flawless makeup! Your videos are giving me life. I am here to stay! I would love to hear more about life in Nigeria. I can’t wait to one day visit!
Omg i say it all the time and no one understands! Let darkskinned black women be…human. Normal, common even. Why do we always have to be black girl magic, queens, goodesses, above and beyond…and what do these archetypes and roles usually play in society. A queen stands by a king and is expected to be a perfect trophy who has power…but never more than a king. A queen in chess and most medias does everything to defend a king. And then irl they want black women on the front lines of protests in danger. A goddess can have a bunch of different things associated, fierce, a healer to her peoples, a savior. Sometimes sex goddess too. And these traits are weaponized against black women too. Bc while they call us these things, they know we’re fully human. Its black girl magic until we falter. Then we’re ridiculed or mocked. It must be exhausting/tiresome to always be compared to these things for a standard. All of these fetishizey titles and “compliments” these type of bm give us feels like another way to dodge giving us the same humanity and thus justifying our treatment.
Love love love this, Mayowa 🙌 Your videos and content are always thought provoking and brain stimulating. Because of you, I bought and read All About Love, and when I heard that Bell Hooks passed, I thought about you. Blessings on blessings, Beautiful 💕💝
This Egyptian man called me Queen and acted like I was some kind of goddess I ran away cz he treats his women like people,and me...well let's just say I was like a fun toy that he would eventually get exhausted with BW, don't date a man who pretends to worship you like a god,cz the reality is that you are just a human being who wants respect and a quality lifestyle witu a significant other So,find you a man who recognize that you are a woman...but above all,a human being and not some mythical creature that visited earth. You are not a toy
I will have to check this book out! I love fantasy. I think you would really like The 5th Season. I'm not good at describing books but from watching your videos and hearing how you think, I think you would really enjoy it :)
I was doing my homework listening to this video and while hearing Big Sean talk I stopped and said "Wait... Big Sean? Like Ariana Grande Jhene Aiko Big Sean??"
"Black Looks" by Bell Hooks is wild. She wrote and explained everything that had confused me about America and race/color from my arrival as a child from Nigeria to adulthood. "Ain't I a Woman" by Bell Hooks broke my mind open and I have never been the same. It is the main reason I now spend more time producing film instead of auditioning for films.
It's complicated to have an honest conversation with them without them starting the childish name calling and venting emotional projections. They don't take the destruction of the community serious at all as a collective; it's a big joke to them. It's pathetic!
It's crazy you're reading that book! I discovered them during quarantine. I bought all three. I was just looking up the author to see if she had anything else because I'm feigning!! I'm ready for a movie.
I am very VERY happy that nick canon refuses to date black women. Every woman he so much as looks at becomes a single mother.
This is absolutely hilarious
🙏🏾💪🏾🤣🤣 So glad
😂😂😂
they are not single mothers , he visits the kids
@@june7gemini Do you “visit” your kids or are you there with them EVERY DAY? 🤔
I honestly ignore people who are not black women when they talk about black women. They say nothing I want to hear.
They not worshipping u so it's a problem
@@rockfresh5359 no this false worship is actually not what most of us want but go off
Hunty...tell it! Yo opinion means ZILCH of u dont look like me. N even then...i side-eye summa deez whoarrrs!
Peachesandpoets but yet you cry to be heard by others but will not listen to others a lie doesn't carry who tells it
@@rockfresh5359 lol be quiet
"If I talk about racism everyone rallies behind me. When I talk about colorism I'm called bitter angry & mad by the same people who was rooting me on when I talked about racism." Faaacts!
Also, deifying is essentially dehumanizing. Like Black women are not “goddesses,” they’re PEOPLE and should be treated as such. And yes, Black women are amazing, but not mythical beings, who should be more humanized, not less.
chiii!!!! This!!!
yup!!!
Yes! This is one of the reasons I find the hard work Black women's hard work that is put in for success is always called, "Black Girl Magic". It's a bit disingenuous to me because being identified as "magical" and "girl" no matter the age is problematic in my opinion.
I no who can help you solve this Problem within 24hours
You can just add him on Whats App immediately for solution
If a man calls you "Queen", "Mother Earth", "God" or "Goddess" RUNNNNN
Lmao the sad part is I don't have anything to combat that 😂. Reminds me of the hotep from menace to society
😂 For real, you just know you're about to get the life sucked out of you
I usually never talk to men that call me that. Its so masculine sounding. I stay away from that. I notice when I wear my natural hair which is 4C i get called those names alot. BM want warriors but then turn around and claim that we are being too strong. Look at the terms that they say...pls make it make sense 🙄
Or calling be 'beloved',,,,, he boutta be the most emotionally unavailable man out there 💀
Mother earth sounds horrible in my oppion because naturally mother nature seems like the king of mother who kind of abuses her kids by doing things like earthquakes she's also a very strong but fearful which kind of isn't the role I want to play considering she plays masculine more scary than most men
They say this to try to pander to us because they know that we are the ones that line their pockets, they know that black women are the ones that go hard for them. I’m so sick of it 🤢
I don’t know how a beautiful woman like you would hate black men. I am getting zaddy vibes. Maybe it’s just that you would like to be with white men because I doubt any black men turned you down.
@@CloudsUnfiltered They are all jealous of Beckie!
@@mnkwaziBelieve whatever makes y’all sleep at night😂.
@@mnkwazi Imagine being jealous of thin haired, fragile skin square body beckie? I'd be a fool being mad at that. 😂
@@mnkwazi Whos jealous of beckie? What does beckie have for anyone to be jealous of? Flat pancakes? 😂
This whole royalty nonsense is honestly nauseating, not flattering. Disingenuous language has serpent's tongue energy. I've had a black man yell at me, at the top of his lungs, that I " can't be a queen" because I ignored his comments while walking down the street. He then proceeded to say that my " attitude" was the reason "they treat us how they treat us". Two seconds earlier, I was the best thing in the world, tell me how that works?🤦🏿♀️ The same ones that call you queen, empress, goddess, whatever other nonsense, are the first ones to denigrate you. Luckily for me and many other Black women, we really don't care to be praised, just leave us be and get out of our way.
Omg, this has happened to me all of the time. These type of men are easily upset at women who do not feed into their ego. Tbh, I dont make eye contact with BM. And I keep my distance from them. They are always attacking us. Its scary and I dont like it. I avoid them at all costs now.
It’s Not Your Attitude! It’s His ! IGNORE TROLLS!
We would appreciate too if you stopped talking about us.
@@howtodoit4204When y’all stop talking about us wearing weave, lashes and nails. Always bringing up how y’all don’t date black women and white women are better blah blah blah we will do the same. Constantly their are videos of black men disrespecting black women unprovoked sooooo…
I’ve never liked being called queen. I associate queen with respectability and patriarchy, two things that have and continue to cause black women the most harm. Also, I looked into the etymology of the word queen and that solidified my dislike for the term. While I do think black women are the origin of all humanity I am uncomfortable with people who are not bw referring to us a gods. It feels like another means of objectification and dehumanization. The further we are from being seen as simply human, the easier it is to enact violence against us.
Preach ♥️
Imagine the power trip from taking down a god(dess). Egos need constant attention.
@@diannalovesfood yesss!
What I love about people is their imperfections and the vulnerability that comes with it. I am a romantic at heart. So that whole "queen" "bad bitch" performance of hyper confidence and power makes me really tired. I want us to be embraced for the humans we are, not the perfect strong coldhearted images that are easy to copy.
Makes sense
I am kind of glad these types of men are not dating BW. Nick Cannon seems to be in a race with Future the rapper to create the most illegitimate children in America and Big Sean seems emotionally unavailable and not willing to commit or be faithful so why would BW want to subject themselves to that? All of these are blessings and BW need to recognize that.
💯💯💯💯
Yeah it's always seemed dehumanizing for black women to have to be either a man's abused object or a man's deified object, "his bitch" or "his queen". Either way I'm not appreciated in my full humanity.
I found it hilarious when Sean said black women create life- he does realise that women of all skin tones give birth right? 😂😂
Then he probably view other women as toys. Men are gross
The KG was pandering to BW, in a bid to sell records.
I don’t want them to date us at this point. Leave us alone. There are others
💯💯💯💯
They be no good anyways. They don't even be faithful and loyal to their preferences. Always cheating at some point.
🎯
AVOID THEM! …
Even as a kid when I'd hear older men flirt by calling women "my queen", it was always an eye roller of a moment.
was big sean saying we come from a black hole to draw a parallel to Black women's gentitalia? thats so fucked up lol
Disgusting and sad , smh
I was thinking that was an odd statement too. Like… awkward
yes, i've felt a way about the "queen" thing too especially bcus it lowkey reinforces the desire for hierarchy. i'm not valuable bcus im an important queen or something, im valuable bcus im a human and the point is for no one to be over anyone.
+ i just recently finished all about love (bell hooks truly was and is amazing) & its really a must read. its def been helping me think more about how im showing up in my life.
nnedi okorafor is a nigerian american speculative fiction writer. i've read "binti" and "shuri" by her and it sounds like you'd be into them. binti is like a sci-fi space novel about a girl being the first from her himba community to be accepted into a "prestigious" technology school-spaceship and shuri is a comic book spin-off of black panther with shuri as the main character. i read them in class, but they're great reads!
@@browneyes7841 Yet, here you are commenting on our business, for what? Hit dogs, do holler, all the time.
I stopped reading at bell hooks 💀
Ummm, human relationships, like all mammals, fall into heirarchy. Modern women are making things way more complicated than they need to be. Just find a good man and shut up and follow his lead. End of story.
I recently read Binti and it was great, shorter than what I normally read though. It made me feel empowered to be an African young women, in the diaspora it has been hard to embrace my culture. I only started learning to embrace myself last year. By the way, Shuri sounds great I’ll definitely look into it.
@@ITech2005 then if that's the case, then there's a pecking order, and BM moping, trying so hard to get or find the respect that they see of the perpetuated higher order, WM should have THEM shutting the hell up, simple as that right? Based on your ahem "logic", BM keep making things harder than they should be, if they just shut up and accept that they are in a lower human experience compared to that of their male white counterparts, maybe so many of 'em wouldn't die with police scenarios, and paint it as victimhood of "police brutality" and accept that they kept paid less, have different VALUE assessed with their human capital, contribution to society, their bank loans, anything like that. PERHAPS just, well, these men, particularly BM, can STOP being so bitter and taking it out on circumstances that won't change this HIERARCHY?....as you termed it? Righttttt.
We don't need MEN to speak for us......period🤷🏾♀️ we didn't ask for their validation....well at least I don't. Thanks for this video, girl❤❤❤
Madam I no who can help you solve this problem for you within 24hour he have done mine for me
You can. Message him on Whats App immediately for solution
Yes y'all do y'all operate on a low frequency
@@zaychambers4558 again, NO ONE ASKED YOU FOR ANYTHING! stay out of FEMALE business....
@Mantime grown man on here going back and forth with a female....go away
"My heart's cold baby!" 🥶 ❤🔥
Me all of 2022 🧊💀
One of the things I love about you Mayowa is that no matter the topic youre ALWAYS spitting facts. You're such a great influence in our community for real. Love you lots!
aww thank you for these love words!!!
I definitely get your point and hate pandering. I believe as a black woman I use “queen” as a way to show black women I support and love them since we get so much static from the outside world.
By calling Black women goddess’s I think it plays into the superwoman complex. It forces Black women to live up to the standard of perfection when no one is perfect. I personally don’t like being called queen ‘cause it’s corny. I do love being called a god but that’s because I view myself very highly and I deserve to be worshipped. But that’s just me
If you look into myths and legends of global cultures they all show that gods are not infallible, perfect beings who live a perfect existence. Only Christianity does that. You will realize the truth of divinity when you open up the perspective .
Why the hell would anyone worship you? Are you kidding?
First of all you are not God. You are not the creator of the earth or the heavens. Only there is one true creator and that's the Lord Jesus Christ. Stop listening to Lucifer telling you that you are a God, he said, the samething to Eve. An this what made her sin against God. We are not supposed to idolize men or ourselves only give the lord Jesus Christ the glory. So that self glorification you are thinking wrong on that. You are idolizing yourself in which is sinful indeed.
@@Mimi24177 lol
@@femdivinemind7777 It''s the truth. People wants to serve the devil. Well the same God they reject they will be begging to come out of hell while screaming.
I think that Nick Cannon is aware of the optics of his longstanding colorism, so he tried to mitigate it in the workplace by hiring Jessie Woo as a "Wildin' Out Girl" after she called out being let go as the only dark sister. But we still see through you, dude.
@@browneyes7841 could you elaborate?
1. I'm every mirror she's Black
2. Dear Black Girl
3. One of the good ones
4. Dear Haiti, Love Alaine
5. Clap when you land
6. The Black Kids
7. Act your age, eve brown
8. How the one armed sister sweeps her house
9. Dear Liberte (Haitian focusing on colorism and classism in upscale New York and Haiti set in 1800s)
I bought a "The Black Woman is God" t shirt when I was younger, but could never wear it cause it gave my spirit the same feeling as being called strong. Gross
We’re not magical ! We’re human beings... Smh this is so sad that we are either marginalised / ignored or deifed and dark skin queens !!
The lack of representation makes us believe every narrative they put us into.
We don’t need to fit into this Queen / goddess movement. Our value is within. We just are, period.
You are magic if u know the powers of our DNA
I feel any compliments for dark BW, coming from BM romantically devoted to nonblack/unambiguous women is only pandering. Actions speak louder than words and outside of the help and dark BW of birth, men like this have few dark BW in their personal lives. This pandering is evident by the quick criticism when there are complaints of colorism. But I get it they have to keep their income streams secure.
I'm reading parable of the sower by octavia butler its really amazing. As a person who grew up only reading and listening to fantasy specifically written by white people (unfortunately), reading this has been SOOO refreshing. Its exactly what you were saying about being able see yourself in a book. I highly recommend. Its also intense! just giving you a heads up. Wish I had read more books by brilliant black women like this growing up.
Oh my gosh! I love Octavia! When I was young, I fell in love with sci-fi genre but we were never there…or seen or heard. It wasn’t until I was older and researched. Her work is so important. I believe they are starting a tv show based on one of books. Finally! Lol
I’m so happy you mentioned Ms. Octavia Butler! I was looking for her in the comments! She is one of *THE* Pioneers of modern sci-if, *PERIOD*!
Those are great books. Loved it!
Octavia Butler is one of my favorite authors. She pioneered sci-fi with black characters.
Parable of the Sower put me in such a dark place I have no more faith in humanity anymore
But what an excellent read 😆
Book recommendation: “For Brown Girls with Sharp Edges and Tender Hearts” by: Prisca Dorcas Mojica Rodriguez - changed my whole undergraduate experience
Ooo thank you BABE!!
I’ve always disliked being called “queen”. I feel similarly to others who have expressed how dehumanizing it is to be placed on a pedestal and denied access to the fullness of human emotions, needs and desires (all because of a stranger’s projections, at that). As a nonbinary, queer person I’ve also never enjoyed the hetero expectations that come with being seen as a queen.
Same here
As a dsbm in America it always seemed weird to hear someone call me a king like you said I'm like everybody can't be kings. I guess I'm more for someone saying I have king like energy? Not sure, but I do love watching your channel! I'm guilty of so much colorism and featurism and grew up not liking my own skin until I was a young adult, so to watch videos like yours is making me very proactive in changing my perspective and actually checking myself. Hearing a new perspective brings awareness and awareness brings change. Keep educating us and pointing out the problems in our psyche!
It’s the title for me!!! Drag them because these folks need to be held accountable ‼️👏🏿
The Stars and the Blackness between them is a great book. It’s a Queer Afro-futurist love story!
Also Ace of Spades is another good one. The black women young adult writer have been showing out!
14:46 I agree. I've always criged whenever I hear people refer to themselves or others as "qween" or "kang" especially when they are not royalty or have anything close to a kingdom. It is very tackly since I often seen it misused for a person that is obviously pandering, agreeing with the majority on a controversial topic or doing/saying the bare minimal for once in their life . This also reminds me of the "high value" "low value" "alpha" "beta" debate.
I understand the sentiments shared in this video. Especially when it comes to putting black women on pedestals, to easily tear them down when they are not living by their standards. Personally I don't mind being referred to as goddess, empress, and queen because of the men in my life see my humanity first and I love that. I had to keep clear of men who haven't healed from societal trauma.
We need more people like you 💪🏿
Being called a goddess means they see me as a fantasy and not a real person with problems. I have been told I was a goddess in a discussion to basically minimize any of my problems or concerns. I shouldn't be making something out of nothing cause I'm a goddess that shouldn't concern myself with worldly rights or emotions. I'm not suppose to be like a worldly man that is angry or sad. I tell them it sounds like cult stuff and they are running away from my main point as if calling me goddess would make me stop talking.
This was a very interesting perspective that I have never considered. I usually take those words as compliments because they are so heavily thrown around. It's definitely true that these words can be easily reversed to dehumanize you. I love that this gave me something to think about!!!
aw yay! im glad It gave you a different perspective!
you can tell when a person truly sees your divinity. they don't just refer to you as such, they treat you as such... most people only say it on a superficial level... they usually don't even know what it entails to be a divine human so most often than not its just empty words said to invoke a response... & it's usually a response that the speaker doesn't deserve.
Nick has issues, hes spreading his seed like its a challenge, he has money but children need more then that!! I can see where Monique was coming from, I'll wear my bonnet all day in the house but Id never wear it outside, I've got to many head scarfs etc. But you don't know a persons mental state...
Omg yes yes yes yes yes
Bonnets are for bedtime!💯
I always roll my eyes when BM calls us queens and gods like they’re not worthy of us. I truly believe they really believe this. They don’t think they’re worthy of us. It’s giving self hate.
YOU HAVE CAIN HATE 👉💯👀😜🤮🥵REPENT OF All YOUR Wickedness 2nd Chronicles 7:14
THEY ARENT! Wake Up
Nope they just don't like us so they are compensating by calling us "Queens" sort of like friend-zoning us lol.
“A lot of the time the people that want to push you to the front, and act as if, you can be holier than thou or you can be perfect, will be the ones waiting for your fall.” SO GODDAMN TRUE, THIS WAS A SERMON. DAMN.
Edit: I’ve also noticed a LOT that I’m held to the most ridiculous standards especially in the work place as a black woman. It’s so suffocating.
The work place is the worst! We get paid the least, have to work the hardest, and they still expect us to swallow the BS microaggressions and accept more work and pick up the slack of others.......and don't ask for a raise - you'll get let go...
@@nicolerichardson1080 seriously. You do all the work and they take all the credit. So glad I quit my job and haven’t looked back LOL.
@@blaqobsydian44 the fact you can do that I'm jealous (not envious or negative)!!! I wish that I could but one day I will and YES I will not look back!! I love that for you, for us!! Stay strong!!
@@nicolerichardson1080 thank you, I pray one day (sooner than you think), you can just say “peace out” and walk away from the toxicity. Take care and protect your energy at all costs Sis.
Don’t stand up for yourself OMG as a black woman your considered crazy child
Anytime you hear a BM calling BW Queens,lace up your Nikes and run. Those men are always disingenuous. Always!!!!!
I agree
Octavia Butler is a must read if your interested in Sci-if or Speculative writing. She's not consider a Fantasy writer, however her work is highly imaginative and empowering. Octavia Butler changed my life and inspired me to read, periodt! Tananarive Due is another Sci-if/Speculative writer whose work is AMAZING! The Blood series will have your mind blown.
The parable of the sower is my all time favourite book
@@osazuwademiirowa-omoregie2500 ❤ I definitely enjoyed her Parables series. I need to reread her whole catalogue. I loved Lilith's Brood and the Wild Seed series just inspired me so much.
I don't like when people call black women queens and goddesses either. We're not either of those. We're just WOMEN! Just call us WOMEN! Also, these black men like Nick Cannon and Big Sean only say that stuff about black women because they are fully aware of being called colorist by black women. So, they try to pander to get back on black women's good side without doing the actual work. They go out of their way to not date black women, but want to call us queens and Gods? 🙄
I am always excited to see you play with makeup. So few of us feel free and confident enough to experiment publicly. At most we may dabble behind closed doors.
Also totally agree most of the time the same people who put others on pedestals are the first people to tear them right back down. Or try to put them "in a box" or "their place".
@@lauramathews3151 I agree. This is such a good point.
“Trying to hit a soft spot” but not trying to treat us like human beings LOL. We are not ethereal in the sense that we don’t exist.....we’re human beings . Treat us with respect. Everyone hates black women so much. What did we do to y’all?
We do absolutely nothing as a whole other than be amazing. I think some hate is due to self hate ( other black people) and or jealousy.
TREAT YOURSELF like a HUMAN You got All that CAiN HATE Envy in You JEALOUSY What You Expect REPENT 👉 Matthews 3:2 2nd Chronicles 7:14 👉💯👀
This video is just perfect, just seeing you elaborate your thoughts is just nice watch.
aw thank u!
@@mayowasworld pls make them as long as you want! I listen to the longer ones on my commute heh
The first sci-fi/fantasy book I read was in college. It was by black author Octavia Butler. Her whole catalog is good, although I am not a fan of Kindred. Since then (late 90s/early 00s) I have discovered many black authors writing in this genre and I love all of them. Nnedi Okorafor, N.K. Jemison, and Nalo Hopkinson are great authors. Lots of trilogies and stand alones. Red Wolf Black Leopard by Marlon James is a page turner. For younger children, the Tristan Strong trilogy by Kwame Mbalia and The Jumbies by Tracey Baptiste. I enjoy audiobook versions. Read by excellent voice actors and with varied accents, makes the stories come to life even more for me.
I also absolutely loved:
- Daughters of Nri by Reni Amayo
- The Deep by Rivers Solomon
- Akata Witch by Nnedi Okorafor
Your mind; You talked about the binary of gods and demons, colonialism and monarchies, colorism and misogynoir. Thank you so much for this! Also, a sci-fi book I recommend that is written and about dark skin people is Kindred by Octavia Butler 💜💛
Yes!!! Highly recommend Lilith’s brood too. Love Octavia.
"You all be creating life and..."
He literally couldn't think of anything else!
This guy that I dealt with stated that BW are Gods yet he wanted to be in a polygamous relationship in order for the income to be greater. Historically polygamy was practiced among the royal and with the man as the sole provider. So the guy that I dealt with wanted women to provide yet you refer to them as Gods…so why not serve them?
After hearing your thoughts on Queendom/Kingdom/Deifying, I started to think “what do I mean or feel when I use such terms.” And I don’t feel like what I imagine has much likeness to the traditional meanings. I think I’m acknowledging the light I see in people. I guess I don’t really see them as ruling others, but ruling their own being, if that makes any sense. Now I really wonder what others imagine or mean when they use queen/king/god. 🤔
All this stems from colorism. BM do like BW just anyone on the lighter side of the spectrum to date. You will see lighter skin women becoming wives quickly versus someone darker skin. Most BM are colostruck when it comes to who they date. I have seen them sleep with dark and marry light. But will call the dark woman "Queen" but wont marry her Make it make sense. Many BM see light skin as currency that explains why so many darker skin women are single because BM are not choosing them. Im so glad that more and more ppl are talking about colorism because it plays a huge part in a persons dating experience and how they see the world.
BM do not call each other out when guys diss darker skin women.
How do I feel about people calling themselves Queen or Goddesses? You are whatever you say you are. It's not hurting anyone 🤣😅 About the guys who don't date BW... We are vindicated about the destruction of the BC. Now, the world sees who and what the real problem is.
Men will say everything to get them in bed and become another baby mama struggle…
I have three older sisters who are black women and they say they don’t like being called Queen either💀 I’ve noticed when guys compliment non black women they’ll say they’re beautiful, gorgeous, lovely, but all black women get called Queen, like that’s the one compliment that’s allowed for all black women
You would absolutely LOVE This Poison Heart by Kaylynn Bayron! It's a fantasy book with black queer people as characters and is about botanity, magic and greek mythology. I wish i could read it for the 1st time again. I probably read it out within a week or two
I absolutely love that book. Have you read Cinderella is dead?
@@daisyflower1545 purchased it the second I was done with TPH and i love that one too! Now I’m just impatiently waiting for This Wicked Fate 🤞🏾
You should check out authors Rivers Solomon and Akwaeke Emezi. Also, if you like Children of Blood & Bone you may like the Raybearer series by Jordan Ifueko. There is some really amazing black written fantasy these days.
Yes yes yes!
This content is NEEDED so y’all hear me 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾♥️♥️♥️
thank u boo!
i have been BINGE-ING talks/interviews with bell hooks. I read/listen to a few chapters of "All About Love" every single day its been changing my life. It's also been pushing me to get back into reading. its wild how each upload from you somewhat aligns with where I am in my life journey because I have that book in my cart right now!
I know this isn't from a Black author, but I'm working on acquiring more books as I get back into my Book-bag as well lol. But, another FANTASTIC fantasy book I just finished is "Iron Widow" by Xiran Jay Zhao. It's a historical sci-fi and the story rocked my world a little, ngl. I highly recommend it! I hope to share more recommendations from Black authors in the future
Thank you for this video
Check out Legendborn! The protagonist is clearly darkskinned and the story is great. I can’t say if I’d classify the author as dark skinned but I believe it touches on colorism and has amazing value as a piece of black fantasy literature. It’s one of the books I wish I had when I was a teen trying to enjoy fiction before people cared about representation.
I thought she was Brownskin? I honestly can't stand the book but I like the root element
I admire the fact that you as a Dark beautiful woman speak on it with confidence don't be gas lit by those who are too coward to speak on it . Speak even louder over those who try to gas light your conversation. Love your show sister and a world of blessings and prosperity.
I feel you Mayowa. When we say these things like, we are gods, I believe you are in essence striving for an unattainable status and therefore unachievable goal. I totally agree with idolizing a person can quickly turn to demonizing them. You see it all the time. Travis Scott demonized but Drake avoided the heat. And I believe that to be true because it’s superficial love or admiration. It’s superficial when you say black women are gods but all you do is date mixed race. Because like you said your doing it because it’s the trendy thing to do for the time being. Just like all these businesses promoting “blackness”. Love your content and you!!! ❤️
That self-hate is so deep so deep...
YES YES YES. everything you said 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾 whew. and to your closing question, i HATE being called Queen. im nonbinary and dont identify with traditionally feminine terms, so thats one. but even when i was cisgender i hated it. i agree with everything you said. seeing me as a “Queen” is their projection, and the second i exist outside of what their idea of being a “Queen” is, im vilified.
"My heart’s cold.. " resonates with meee
I just finished Children of Virtue and Vengeance (it's a sequel to Children of Blood and Bone) and it was truly AMAZING!!! Tomi Adeyemi's writing is SO beautiful!!
That's one of my favorite books! I'm a big fantasy reader in general but Children of Blood and Bone is in my top ten favorites.
I would also recommend Raybearer by Jordan Ifueko. Amazing worldbuilding. Ifueko a Nigerian-American and Raybearer draws a lot of inspiration from Nigerian mythology.
If you haven't already,read some Octavia Butler, I'd recommend"Wild Seed" to start 🙌🏽✨💖
13:00 I hear that 💯 It's like how a vid of white professors talking about colonialism from a "progressive" stance goes viral, but people don't/didn't listen when we've been saying it from an anti-colonial perspective before them
Even in the Bible the dragon, the evil one would come for the woman! The no 1 woman still is de BLACK WOMAN! So this movie makers, these devils children are doing what is written and prophesied!!
Nothing but facts!!!! Clap
These black men would call us God and saviors but treat us like dirt beneath their feet. Men like Nick Cannon are goofy af.
My ex was a dark skin colorist. He used to call me queen just to try to play me 😬 it was creepy but I tried to go along with it. I was the darkest women he ever dated too. Smh I've dealt with that too many times...
On the topics of books, I started reading a book of short stories called Between Two Seas by Cerece Rennie Murphy. It's a light read but interesting and easy to get into. I've been enjoying it so far
your channel is very insightful, very inspiring. these topics need to be kept to the forefront.
yes the whole Black women are God and all powerful takes away from their humanity and that is very problematic. I howled with laughter so hard when Nick cannon and Sean clips started playin. these guys totally don't mean what they say 🤣🤣
Children of blood and bones is more than fire, I’m waiting for the next tome
Your hair is so thick sis. There have been times that I tried to comb (finger or pick detangle) my thick type 4 hair and just cried: That was before I learned drenching my hair with dechlorinated water is the key.
It's probably been mentioned but yeah, I think one definite downside to the "queen" moniker is that people will then use it to say "oh well you can't have had it that bad if you're a QUEEN," thusly they'll opt to diminish the magnitude of suffering black women have endured for centuries and continue to endure.
I was recently having a conversation with my coworkers, who are non-Black people, about race relations and how we can't stand the division in the media. I mentioned how I feel like my Blackness is magnified as a "special difference" in the media so much that non-Black people often behave unnaturally around me as if they are going out of their way to not offend me, less they be seen as racist. I told them point blank, that the best way they can prove that they mean well to me and see me as an equal is to treat me as if I look just like them. I told them to think of me as the same born and raised American that they are. I don't think someone is racist until they exhibit racism. Something amazing happened that day. For the first time in my life, when I am with those people, I don't feel different. We are totally relaxed around each other and have conversations about everything. We laugh hard with each other and joke around about "controversial topics" and pick each other's brains about things. We comfort each other during sad times and encourage each other. I don't feel Black around them. I feel like myself and they enjoy my company and show respect to me the same way I do them. I don't have to question if they are judging me based on my race whenever I make mistakes, that is a freeing realization. All of the awkwardness disappeared the day I voiced those words. Americans need to remember that we are one nation. We should be acting and thinking like one. We are each other's countrymen first and foremost. If we don't have each other's backs then who will? We are each other's people. Every single state in this country is full of Americans and Americans come in all shapes sizes and colors. In all the years this country has existed, Americans have interbred so much with each other that most family trees are not single race. We are trying so hard to divide ourselves while demanding to be treated like a member of the collective American population. How can we be divided and a collective at the same time? I know that I may get some negativity from this by separatists but I don't think I am wrong to want all Americans to be a cohesive nation. Divided we fall. Race relations is our weakness point and they are pressing it hard because we keep letting it work on us. That's what the powers that be want to accomplish to keep control. Keep us broken and distrustful so that we don't join up and overthrow the evil that is classist hierarchy.
The were just pandering, I don't care what 'sweet talk' these men come with, my heart is stone.
i have never really had a problem with the words "queen or Goddess" but when you but it that way i dont wannabe be called queen
I really really appreciate videos like this so much. Its really hard to meet people that understand these concepts and this is what we need. Please never stop making videos!!!
I am a new subscriber and I want to take the time to let you know how much I love your content. I’m currently binge watching and learning so much. You are giving me language to put to so many things that I have lived throughout my 36 years of life as a dark skinned black woman. I want to thank you for taking the time to make these videos and for voicing your opinion. I am here for EVERYTHING! The beautiful thick locs, the gorgeous dark skin and flawless makeup! Your videos are giving me life. I am here to stay! I would love to hear more about life in Nigeria. I can’t wait to one day visit!
I love how you presented this topic. You have so much personality and it's nice seeing topics like this from different perspectives ❤
Spot on, I have no additional commentary.... the delusion and manipulation is disturbing.
“We all come out of a black hole” 🕳
A doctor said that? Or a “doctor” said that.
Vulgar way to describe black women’s body parts. A “hole”. Ick.
Well that, and the fact that black holes consume any matter they come into contact with, even light.
I have that book! Just haven't read it yet so... I'll have to dig in to it. N.K. Jemisin is another Black female fantasy author.
Omg i say it all the time and no one understands!
Let darkskinned black women be…human. Normal, common even.
Why do we always have to be black girl magic, queens, goodesses, above and beyond…and what do these archetypes and roles usually play in society.
A queen stands by a king and is expected to be a perfect trophy who has power…but never more than a king. A queen in chess and most medias does everything to defend a king. And then irl they want black women on the front lines of protests in danger.
A goddess can have a bunch of different things associated, fierce, a healer to her peoples, a savior. Sometimes sex goddess too. And these traits are weaponized against black women too. Bc while they call us these things, they know we’re fully human.
Its black girl magic until we falter.
Then we’re ridiculed or mocked.
It must be exhausting/tiresome to always be compared to these things for a standard. All of these fetishizey titles and “compliments” these type of bm give us feels like another way to dodge giving us the same humanity and thus justifying our treatment.
That's a word!!💯
Love love love this, Mayowa 🙌 Your videos and content are always thought provoking and brain stimulating. Because of you, I bought and read All About Love, and when I heard that Bell Hooks passed, I thought about you. Blessings on blessings, Beautiful 💕💝
This Egyptian man called me Queen and acted like I was some kind of goddess
I ran away cz he treats his women like people,and me...well let's just say I was like a fun toy that he would eventually get exhausted with
BW, don't date a man who pretends to worship you like a god,cz the reality is that you are just a human being who wants respect and a quality lifestyle witu a significant other
So,find you a man who recognize that you are a woman...but above all,a human being and not some mythical creature that visited earth.
You are not a toy
I will have to check this book out! I love fantasy. I think you would really like The 5th Season. I'm not good at describing books but from watching your videos and hearing how you think, I think you would really enjoy it :)
This was so well thought out and helped me put somethings into perspective. Thank you❤️
thanks for representing our genetics via natural hair
It's call pandering for the black women dollar
I liked it before watching it because I know it will be on point.
I was doing my homework listening to this video and while hearing Big Sean talk I stopped and said "Wait... Big Sean? Like Ariana Grande Jhene Aiko Big Sean??"
"Black Looks" by Bell Hooks is wild. She wrote and explained everything that had confused me about America and race/color from my arrival as a child from Nigeria to adulthood. "Ain't I a Woman" by Bell Hooks broke my mind open and I have never been the same. It is the main reason I now spend more time producing film instead of auditioning for films.
I just stop listening to BM to be honest lolll. They’re not serious ppl
Same here. I avoid them.
It's complicated to have an honest conversation with them without them starting the childish name calling and venting emotional projections. They don't take the destruction of the community serious at all as a collective; it's a big joke to them. It's pathetic!
Yeah ! They are boys.
Black boys are children mentally.
It's crazy you're reading that book! I discovered them during quarantine. I bought all three. I was just looking up the author to see if she had anything else because I'm feigning!! I'm ready for a movie.
check out Octavia E. Butler - Parable of the Sower (Science Fiction)