I've Got a Little List - The Mikado - Gilbert and Sullivan

DVD Available Now: bit.ly/XDoSKU
Mitchell Butel of Avenue Q fame sings "I've Got a Little List" from Gilbert and Sullivan's The Mikado. This excerpt is from the cinema/DVD recording of Opera Australia's 2011 production at the Arts Centre, Melbourne.
Lyrics:
As someday it may happen that a victim must be found,
I've got a little list. I've got a little list
Of society offenders who might well be underground
And who never would be missed, who never would be missed.
There's the idiot denouncing with enthusiastic tone
All football teams but his and every suburb but his own.
The man who sits beside you on the plane and wants to talk,
Whose jabbering inspires you to jab him with your fork.
Your aunty with the moustache who insists on being kissed.
They'd none of them be missed, they'd none of them be missed.
(He's got them on the list! He's got them on the list!
And they'd none of them be missed! They'd none of them be missed!)
Those whinging letter writers and those pundits in the press.
That opinion columnist, that bore would not be missed.
That trendy thing in opera if the plot seems like a mess,
That nice surtitlist!
(Surtitles: 'This song is not on my list. Normal transmission will resume shortly')
The politician prancing round in speedos tightly packed,
He thought it cool but really it just showed us what he lacked.
And Canberra's leading red-head who's afraid of stickybeaks,
Who'd like to keep her fumbles and mistakes off Wikileaks.
Australian Idol singers who pathetically persiiiiiiiiiist.
They'd none of them be missed. They'd none of them be missed.
(He's got them on the list! He's got them on the list!
And they'd none of them be missed! They'd none of them be missed!)
And the purists who insist piano music stops at Brahms,
I'll put them on the list, and make them sit through Liszt.
On Saturday night the mob at Flinder's Street all singing psalms,
I wish they would desist, and their happy claps resist.
That music theatre sequel that they promised would be good,
"Love never dies" they say, but I confess I wish it would.
That Frenchman and the other one who judge My Kitchen Rules,
Who give new definition to the label 'Kitchen Tools'.
That morning television host who's funny as a cyst,
Gold Logies he has kissed, but it's time to kiss my fist.
(He's got them on the list! He's got them on the list!
And they'd none of them be missed! They'd none of them be missed!)
Then the merchant banker wankers and the bonuses they flout,
And the subprimortgagist, I've got him on the list!
The governments like lapdogs rushing in to bail them out,
To their mills it's simply grist, so I've got them on the list.
Retirees who migrate to the country to make wine,
And Britney Spears for accidentally showing her 'vagine'.
Those climate change deniers who don't like the carbon tax,
Who haven't read the science and don't really know the facts.
The women on the tram who at Spring Carnaval got pi-- really drunk!
Narelle! Where are my shoes?!
They'd none of them be missed. They'd none of them be missed.
(You may put them on the list. You may put them on the list.
And they'd none of them be missed! They'd none of them be missed!)
There's the ticket holder next to you who cannot work their phone,
And cannot get the gist. I've got her on the list!
Who leaves it on or switches to that dreadful silent drone... Vrrrrrr Vrrrrr Vrrrrr
Facebook fiends and Twitterists are also on the list.
And people who inflict on us full cycles of the Ring,
I'd rather ride a valkyrie than hear Brunhilde sing.
And all commercial managements who want to cast a star,
They couldn't get one this time, they got me, so there you are.
Or worst of all the actor who's an extra lyricist,
I don't think he'd be missed, so I've got him on the list.
(You may put them on the list! You may put them on the list!
And they'd none of them be missed! They'd none of them be missed!)