Stop Lowering Your Standards in Dating

[@hustlaholiday]

Nah, y’all smoked this conversation. Keep up the good work.

[@koereyelle]

Thanks for watching!

[@missklassy4447]

@@koereyelle You're excellent in your delivery! Stop dating down with BM who don't support you like the one your responding to that hates BW while putting poor YT woman on a pedestal for 40 years; he's an Old FOOL

[@michaelokoro2912]

I think another delusion women tend to have is thinking they have a lot of options, when in reality, it's really a bunch of man lusting after you. There needs to be a distinction made between lust and value.

[@user-dz1sm9kx1l]

Agreed... but we can't forget that a lot of men think they have options too but in reality their "options" only want them for money and not for who they actually are. Without money, men wouldn't have many options because a lot of men are legit shitty people. There needs to be a distinction made between wanting you for the money and material and wanting you because of your exceptional character and spirit. Money and material only bring about 20 percent of your value the rest is your TRUE character and the spirit you carry.

[@user-dz1sm9kx1l]

I can guarantee if these men who think they are a catch played broke today them "options" will be on to the next wealthy guy. How much of the prize are you really if they only want you when you have money? The money is the prize lol

[@malimal4972]

@@user-dz1sm9kx1l Much more delusional single women than there are delusional men. Our reality shows if we are delusional or not and we have to adjust . Yall be 50 still thinking a 6 foot dude making 6 figures is going to wife yall

[@michaelokoro2912]

@@user-dz1sm9kx1l That's true! In the same breath, you can say the same about women who obtain wealth and have a hard time finding a partner. They obtain some of the same controlling qualities that they claim men with money possess.

[@michaelokoro2912]

@@user-dz1sm9kx1l That's valid! However, just know that access to the next man's wealth always come with stipulations. While you may think you're reaping all the benefits, those conditions are designed to keep you at bay.

[@HeyJuuude-05]

You are such a great interviewer. The questions you ask, the time you give your guests to respond without interrupting, the respectful manner in which you inject opposing views into the conversation without seeming mean-spirited, it’s all soo immaculate. Thank you facilitating these conversations. You are a net-positive to our community.

[@thececman]

I Agree…Very Refreshing Even In The Face Of Vulgar Immaturity!

[@bkstandard882]

I'm currently talking to a young lady 12 years younger than me. I'm 35. I didn't seek this girl out. I just happened to meet her and i honestly thought she was older because of the way she carried herself.

[@Zeek509]

She made valid points but most with a negative slant towards black men. Around 23:00 she talked about how its okay for BW to date interracially if they are overlooked by BM because BM are the seekers. But its not okay for a BM to CHOOSE outside his race. Just because men are the seekers doesn't mean we get picked either. She even said around 29:20 that men in their 30s with money are sometimes corny.Terrell Owens is a great example of this double standard.
Regarding the delusions men have around 28:20 she mentioned men think we are more valuable and have 1,000 options and 1,000 years to get married. We dont think that, we just not pressed about it like women are. Women operate off of a biological clock. Men operate off of a financial one. We can have kids way past our prime so the #1 thing we focus on when deciding to settle down is our finances. And by default men are more content with being single, so even if we are older with good finances, if we dont find a suitable wife its no big deal because we can just travel or do other things. WOMEN are sold the dream of marriage growing up and legally it benefits them more, not men.
We pay for dates, buy the ring, the house, build, etc. And if it doesn't work out she can walk away with half AND OUR CHILDREN!?? If the roles were reversed women wouldn't be quick to marry either. So I'd rather not rush into it and if I dont find a suitable mate its still cool. 💯 🤷🏾‍♂️

[@sirpream.clientele]

Precisely...

[@cyes1156]

🎯🎯

[@AlexMinor]

Lots of shaming language being thrown around in this conversation.
Who hurt y’all?
You disparage the avg black man, but y’all aren’t even checking for the average black man. Most of the good black men who are ready for marriage are invisible to y’all or you label “corny”.
There’s a reason 45% of black men are married vs. 26% of black women.
The problem isn’t us.
And your “black men aren’t choosing black women” argument is a straight up lie. 85% of black men are married to black women.
Y’all are our first choice. But a lot of you need to take a hard look in the mirror and be honest if you’re making the choice easy for black men.

[@cyes1156]

🎯🎯

[@tstephen79]

Echo chamber. No push back at all.

[@HeyJuuude-05]

Do you want to push back though? Do you think that it’ll bear productive fruit? Has it worked in the past? Do you seriously want to expel energy in this direction anymore? Is it helping the black community?

[@MB-xv7er]

If I had high standards I could’ve avoided so much hurt. I was guilted to have low standards and honestly it was the worst thing I ever gave into

[@missklassy953]

Wow, Maceo that's why you married a poor White woman! Its just like you said about marriage and also education because you didn't get an education so you tried to downplay it! . Black men are a poor investment, I look at you and your friends who end up with nothing! *I"m so happy I kept my standards it was worth it!*

[@Seven_Aint_Nine]

You got what you could afford

[@Life23Live]

Only 27 and recently separated . We should have a talk about women getting out of a marriage and dating again.

[@antwanlacy]

This young lady needs more experience and education on this topic.

[@shirlsshirls8594]

Because she’s speaking truth? Most young women get the ick from older men.

[@duanewoodson9804]

What is funny and sad this young lady act as if she would been able to survive during the slavery error thru World War II. Send her to Afghanistan and Ukraine and her whole tune would change. So privileged in this modern era because she was never born during war time and then had to survive. Fortunately, this young woman would never be chosen to become incarnate.

[@thececman]

Facts

[@Moneymo0824]

lol this is gold. Sisters I promise you bm can marry any race of women any race of men aren’t snatching up bw

[@yvettejones6196]

This may be true but all women want money and security. White women don’t want unaccomplished men.

[@theperfectbrother]

Wow I feel sorry for her man and I hope woman aren't listening to her or the rate for single woman is fixing to double

[@koereyelle]

Which part do you disagree with?

[@lingud8002]

These young women are so refreshing ❤, and they really do know what they are speaking. On top of that they are intelligent. Keep it going young ladies, it’s awesome when both younger and older women can learn something from them ❤

[@koereyelle]

Thanks so much for watching! We hope you'll subscribe to the channel for more💕

[@consciousra5281]

The problem is women like this continues to carry this same old rhetoric every generation of women especially in our culture. SMDH!
What happened with building with somebody growing together early in life?

[@blaqnificentmediaMSb]

What happened to my body my choice? Let the men do what they want

[@sweetiet602]

Excellent Interview...You guys dropped so many gems and diamonds. It takes courage to speak knowledge and common sense . Thank You 👏💖💕

[@Tyrantoftheworld]

It's unfortunate that the interviewer never challenged the views of Alison. She talks about BM dating outside their race but a simple question could have been "Why do you think BM are doing that?" And don't let her give the BS "media" answer. Statistically 80% of BM marry BW. But there were a bunch of questions that SHOULD have been asked instead of allowing her to just talk. For example, men date younger not adolescences there's a famous study that shows that men from 18-23 find women their age the most attractive but men 24-60 find a woman at 23/24 the most attractive. So her saying men would date 13 if legal, there is zero evidence of this in professionally backed studies.
People talk about propaganda not being good, well this is how it happens. Someone comes in says things and aren't challenged and thus people leave and think this is true.

[@malimal4972]

She def challenged those two guys whom she interviews from the Hardly Initiated podcast. Easy to see the agenda being played out

[@Confettifun]

80% of black men are married to black women, how many black men are ACTUALLY MARRIED??? You statistic means nothing out of the context that so few black men actually get married as opposed to making women baby mommas. The stat probably means most of the black men who actually get married are attracted to black women. Not that most black men chose black women.

[@Mochateaaaa]

The studies only show that men find women 23/24 most attractive. Show me a study where us early twenty year olds are actually having relationships with men 30+ years. We think you are all creeps.

[@tinker2217]

Not sure if an agenda is being played out... I simply think she agreed with her so she didn't challenge her views.

[@alignwithalison]

Well first the interviewer IS Alison. Hi!
Secondly, I “pushed back” a few times. Perhaps if you were to re-listen, you’d hear it.
I questioned her stance on interracial dating, moving in before marriage, etc.
By the way, interviewing isn’t debating. As an interviewer I chose 2-3 points to “push back” on to gain clarity for every interview I conduct. Not to refute. That’s not my job.
Thank you for watching and commenting!

[@girlbrittneygirl]

I believe in the title it said men were the problem?

[@girlbrittneygirl]

Your legacy is you! Not your children!

[@jimday7434]

The young lady has a beautiful perspective, well presented. It would be nice to see her excise the nasty language, its not lady like.

[@Daft_Sage]

Hello. First time viewer. Great channel. I would be interested in the guests value system. She in some instances rejects traditional gender roles and in some instances accepts traditional gender roles. E.X. Women are valued for youth and beauty and men are valued for position and wealth vs Men seek/pursue and women are found. In an ideal world, what would women value, what would men value and what would the dynamic between the sexes be?

[@boystobusiness]

Woah, you went to the worse case scenario with this one. In most scenarios man might be 40 years old looking for 28 year-old, which is not crazy. But you insinuating that we want to date. Children is crazy. Most men just want a feminine positive women who would go with their game plan we are not trying to fight you on what we do when we do it we want a woman who is agreeable and will follow our lead. You’re definitely given off masculine energy with you wanting to be assertive and having a game plan, that’s not what high earning men want, or men in general. You don’t see a lot with other races of women. It’s mostly just black women.

[@sirpream.clientele]

And yet they say "it's only" single women that KEEP women single.

[@Mochateaaaa]

This is crazy. And I will tell you, just because men are attracted to us 20 year olds, doesn’t mean the feeling is reciprocated or mutual. That’s creep age for us. We definitely know men that age that are single normally have serious character flaws that women closer to their age are not dealing with. Men can be attracted, but don’t think we feel the same. On another note, I wouldn’t consider dating a man that old unless I was in my early to mid 30’s. I much rather a man my age, so we can grow together and build together.

[@Zeek509]

Women fail to realize that they have a biological clock and we don't. Many men are not in a financial position to support a family until 35-40. So if a man is 40 and finally wants to start a family, OF COURSE he's going to look at women who can still have children! Yes its creeps out here but its not always that deep. And thats another reason women are complaining about men not approaching anymore because we literally get called creeps for every little thing.

[@HeyJuuude-05]

@@MochateaaaaYou are right. Just curious, what would you say is a reasonable age gap for you personally?

[@cyes1156]

​@@Mochateaaaa
Lori Harvey was 22 when she dated Future (35)
Lori Harvey was 23 when she dated P. Diddy (50)
Lori Harvey was 24 when she dated Michael B.Jordan (35yrs old)
Knock it off if you can date high status men like Lori Harvey could u would

[@Rolling8687]

Hello..."A" love the podcast

[@malimal4972]

11:20 Yeah this is when BW are going to check out of this conversation, they def not trying to hear anything bad about them becoming single mothers , cause they know they can't help themselves but to become one. #marryb4ucarry

[@Ninicarterr]

Who makes them single mothers? Answer quickly.

[@malimal4972]

@@Ninicarterr Ther person who decided to bring forth life , her body, her choice right ? Answer quickly....

[@Coco_Love]

It takes two let’s not put all the blame on the women now

[@malimal4972]

@@Coco_Love It takes one decision to bring forth life , her body her choice right ? her responsibility

[@Coco_Love]

Wow I’m so sorry you have that mind set.. you have a blessed day

[@duanewoodson9804]

Does Denzel Washington look better now or in his earlier years?

[@Rolling8687]

At times we as "Black Americans" do alot of talking but show little action when it comes to the important things overall in life. The odds has always been against us since slavery and now in the present. "Black Americans" Do More Action To Help Each Other.

[@destinyw.8661]

what did Michael Jackson say " dont have a baby , if you cant feed the baby, and dont say maybe if you cant feed the BABY " ? something like that...

[@sirpream.clientele]

So, why are you all having kids "you can't afford" to feed, with men who DON'T want kids with you.

[@TrangPakbaby]

The fact that most men in our community view marriage and stability as a bigger commitment than bringing actual people into the world should instantly exclude them as viable partners 🙅🏽‍♀️

[@MuckCityProductions]

Most black men don't even have children....

[@MuckCityProductions]

Only 46% of BM have children though... 61% of BW have kids... and 80% of those are out of wedlock.

[@drakim2]

Love when Amani is held accountable.

[@alexlevingston]

Me too.

[@neahjusschillinchik]

I didn’t necessarily agree on some of the points regarding single mothers. I would have rather jumped into the Grand Canyon than have been proposed by my son’s father 😂

[@Seven_Aint_Nine]

Why did you have his child?

[@basimahknowshow]

A man os more valuable as he married!
Unmarried men are not as valuable in business, etc.
You level up when you are married.
So many benefits...
Taxes
Business
Work
*Deals/Discounts
Car Insurance
Life Insurance Policies
Real Estate
Banking
Credit
The list goes on 🤔
There is no guaranteed BENEFITS while single that can surpass a married couple.🤷🏽‍♀️
Getting married for a man is a MUST TO THE WOMAN YOU ACTUAL WANT & LOVE!😯😳

[@sirpream.clientele]

So, I guess such men as Al Pacino, Keanu Reeves, 50 Cent, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk, etc. are no longer valuable, since they're either no longer married...or ever married.
You don't need to be married to be rich, after all...smart men don't file joint tax returns.
And Jeff Bezos gets a Federal Refund...

[@PCSPITTER4NY]

Complete nonsense

[@girlbrittneygirl]

This lady needs to just be quiet about households and children ! Because she doesn’t understand what she’s talking about. It doesn’t matter if both parents are in the house or not ! The child needs A community!

[@alezandradavila2581]

Nice 👍

[@girlbrittneygirl]

All a kids needs is great influences their lives!

[@girlbrittneygirl]

There are plenty of children who do well in single parent households!

[@girlbrittneygirl]

Ladies! If a male leaves you! You are lucky!

[@girlbrittneygirl]

Marriage an easier commitment!? What? This lady needs to stop while she’s ahead!

[@thefilmmakerg]

Whoo dont listen to a woman like this

[@girlbrittneygirl]

It’s not about having the father in the house, it’s about the father being there for their kids! If he chooses not to be there, then it could a granddad, uncle, older cousin!

[@duanewoodson9804]

Abraham and Isaac and Jacob prove you wrong.

[@duanewoodson9804]

Young lady purpose that is selfish and not in alignment with GOD’s purpose.

[@jemeljerome]

Women who aren't married talking like if they know it all😅

[@Rolling8687]

Oh wow...give them a chance to speak how they feel but they need men rich or poor

[@Seven_Aint_Nine]

The woman on right is married

[@Seven_Aint_Nine]

She seems traumatized

[@Cro_nisha]

❤yessss🎉

[@EclsCoaching]

❤❤❤❤

[@moniquem1873]

❤❤❤

[@girlbrittneygirl]

Ma’am the child needs a community not just a father! The majority of times the mother can raise the child on her own! The community also helps! You don’t have to be married to have a children! You can go to a sperm bank, there’s also adoption! A two parent household isn’t necessary!

[@koereyelle]

Wow. What an extremely sad statement. It’s no wonder our community is in the shape it’s in when people believe a child doesn’t need a two parent household. Truly unfortunate way to think.

[@girlbrittneygirl]

@@koereyelle The community is in the sale it’s because you have unnatural/ unrealistic expectations! I never said a child didn’t deserve two parents to in their lives! I said a father is not necessary to be in a child’s life, I said a child needs a community more than two parent household! Both parents don’t have to live in the same house 24/7.

[@koereyelle]

Is it safe to assume you or your children grew up in a situation like this? Typically comments like this come from women who’s two parent household didn’t work out. So they make excuses for “what’s possible” to convince themselves versus facing what is PROBABLE. Research shows the best possible situation is for two healthy parents to raise a child together.

[@girlbrittneygirl]

@@koereyelle My personal life is irrelevant! The research and studies that you’re referring to on the nuclear family is absolutely b.s. in comparison to actual nature! 80 percent of women are initiating divorce! That tells you, that the nuclear family is not sustainable! With being said that a child’s father can’t be active in their lives! However the reality is that the majority of the time the mother is raising the children and father disappears! When talk about single parent households just as a male , you refer to single mothers, not fathers ! Stop it with male identified b.s.

[@koereyelle]

@@girlbrittneygirl you answered my question. Your perspective is from a place of personal pain just as I thought.

[@zierra2472]

Yes another thing, men explain why if your daughters were to come to you with an older man you would have an issue with it , but yet you lot can go and do this, Amani again is so right about this , why are these older men so quick to defend dating younger but if it was there daughters doing this they’d have an issue , because it would be looking in to a mirror seeing themselves, and knowing why a man old enough to be there father is with them , and they don’t like it .

[@HeyJuuude-05]

I agree, it is quite disgusting. What would you say is a reasonable maximum age gap?

[@duanewoodson9804]

Now you are being disingenuous. Which men and what is that specific male economic position as compared to you being raised to be a wife like your great great great great grandmothers. Privileged modern woman who has all the modern appliance to assist in the household that could not hold any weight to those woman from that generation from the beginning of time thru World War Two.