7 Reasons Why Introverts HATE Phone Calls
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 27 ต.ค. 2020
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Explaining why introverts hate using the phone
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If you hate the phone for a different reason, share in the comments!
😜Jeez, you waste no time!
You're right and it hurts.
💘🔥💘🔥💘
: /my dad phone rings
: HEY! (calls my little brother) ANSWER THAT PHONE CALL. TELL HIM/HER DAD LEFT HIS PHONE AT HOME. CALL HIM AGAIN LATER.
“The Untethered Soul” is a beautiful book and can support introverts in doing phone calls. It helps you to get out of the repetitive thinking, which causes so much of our anxiety.
That is one of my favorite books! I think i had read it at least 3 times! 😊
Finally someone is giving me a good and logical reason for trying audible :)
person: **calls me**
me: **stares at phone until it stops**
I thought I was the only one!
Lol hehe
YUP! If I don't know why you're calling already, I'm not picking up. If I do know why you're calling, I'm still probably not picking me. Send me a damn email so I can spend two days perfecting my half sentence reply lol
@@Urza9814 me xD
YEAH
When you accidentally call someone and you have a mini anxiety attack
And the bastard calls you back
This made me laugh so freaking hard!
😅😅😅
I have totally done that before and about hid under my bed to avoid talking when I saw them call me back.
Oh, jeez, I’ve done that.. I hate it when that happens..
OMG I laughed so hard that my stomach ache LOL🤣🤣
I litteraly wait untill they hang up and then i send em a text apologizing for the mistaken sudden call
OmG 😱 freaking out just reading this! Like NOOOO! 😂😂😂
When face time was invented the anxiety doubles urghhh
Yesssss
You would think that face time would help an introvert feel less stressed because they can actually see visual cues, but it doesn't. It's more stressful to do a face time.
@@marianamartinez7100 Because the chances of not understanding what the other person is saying are even higher !
It kinda helps in some ways but then it also hinders in others
@@dianeaishamonday9125 if face time was as smooth in the real world as it is in the ads I would be less anxious. But really with all the glitches and so, it just leads to more miscommunication in the end
me in a call:
"uhh....."
"haha....ha"
"yeah...yeah"
"umm...ok..."
suddenly went quiet*
me: "anxiety / panik attack"
Why is this me? 😔😔
I know that too well. Sometimes you say like 2 sentences in a row and sit back for a while😂
I totally do that. I call it my Autopilot Mode, and I had one friend (an INTJ) who totally picked up on that and knew almost immediately when I was kind of done and not listening anymore and would call me out on it and laugh. Lol!
Introverts hearing phone ringing is like an incoming missile alert.
Omg so true! 🤣
That's why I never set my favourite song as my phone's ringtone.
@@Abhayabhayam same. I once put one of my favourite songs as a ringtone, and after some days I regretted it. Same goes for my alarm tone. It took a long time for me to be able to enjoy those songs without having memories of getting nervous of getting phonecalls with that music.
@@_sam_ddn So relatable 🤝
@@donaldtinney8085 to do everything else but call obv
If you want to call an introvert, book a year in advance. We need to prepare
😆😆😆😆😭😭😭 soooo true
Hahahaag
Unexpected interaction? Just no!
Amén.
And I hope you forget it by then.
You forgot to add 1 more point. "They don't like phone call because it makes them tired and loss of energy also"
I swear I feel like my life force has been sucked away
Totally agree!
Absolutely right about being "held hostage" by conversation. Eventually we learn who Holds Us hostage, and to roll the call into voicemail.
My friend: "Just make the call. what's the worst thing that could happen?"
Me: "They could answer!"
Haha
Not answering is even worse for me. They might call back any second. If not I have to go through the whole process of preparing myself to call them again.
you might get yelled at *emotional whiplash*
YESSS!THATS THE WORST THING EVER ISTG!🔥💀
True!🤭
Before calling me, ask yourself, "can this be texted?"...
Or emailed. Or maybe not sent at all. Because that's a whole 'nother can of worms--superfluous emails and texts!!
I can never understand how people can stay on the phone for hours.
@@V.E.R.O. me and my friend usually stay on the phone for like and hour but it’s because we like to call as we play online games together
@@whosthegarden Well that's different, you're doing something together. I probably wouldn't mind doing that.
extroverts be like: *N O*
The only phone call I answer or call back instantly is my mom's. She's my parent, obviously, but also because I can be honest with her (I can tell her I don't want to talk right now) and she won't be offended. Whenever I say that I don't want to talk to my friends, they either are offended or they think I'm mad at them. No, I am not mad and no, I'm not saying I don't want to talk to YOU, I just don't want to talk in general.
I can relate because in discord app my friends call me and I was watching TH-cam videos and they call me out of nowhere
Same. Exactly
Yes my mom and sister I’m good anyone else WHY???!!!!!!!!!!! 😂
I agree... For me it's also when someone knocks on my door or rings the bell on my apartment. It gets me so really anxious.
I usually (if possible) try to not make noise so they just leave 😂 and also stay real quiet for the next 10 minutes (just in case lol)
I agree I hate the “POP IN” whether I’m busy or not I have to stop and try to entertain you,unless it’s an emergency, I don’t care if you were in the neighborhood Show some respect 😡🤬
Working in retail is so hard, I know I have to help people, I don’t have a problem with that but it’s more of talking to my coworkers that I have to make an excuse to end the conversation
I actually feel more comfortable just typing than talking.
For me it depends on who I'm talking to.
OMGosh same! I’ve been typing with my friend and he invited me to meet him irl and I freaked out and made an excuse not to go.
Neither for me
Same
same
We should start writing letters again. Gives me time to think what I'm going to say...
Or just text
Absolutely!💌
Yes PLEASE!! I would love this, instead of instant responses on whatsapp etc it makes my brain hurt to process and reply properly
I quit social media and decided to write the people that I love letters instead. I don’t really get letters back but it’s so much more fulfilling to send those letters than using social media
same thoughts! that would be phenomenal
What about hating small talk? Phone calls tend to be long, drawn out small talk sessions. I'm trapped on a phone with nothing to do, the person on the other end has nothing interesting to say and neither do I. I cant distract myself on the internet cause I'm on my phone. Its boring, intrusive, and just the worst feeling of being trapped.
Dear Gods I hate small talk.
I *DESPISE* small talk
It's no.1 on the list of things I hate doing 😬
Haha me while on the phone….im reading or playing on game on my iPad…now if it’s a serious convo… then I don’t …then it takes me a bit to unstress after the call…
I personally worry about forgetting things, so I always have to write a sort of script before hand and with more serious phone calls, I’m afraid they’ll ask something and I won’t know the answer and be stuck.
Omg, I do the exact same thing too!
@@keerahh2378 Don't worry, I do the exact same thing! That's the main reason why I stay as far away from the phone as I can, even at home.
I do that too!! I think to myself, who has to do this??? I guess I do and a few others. 😅
I always plan my calls that I have to do, write down notes about what is important and plan the words to end the calls... when somebody calls me I never pick up. I look who called and decide if or when I will call back .. my friends know that and if they have to talk to me personal, they send me a message and I can call them when I'm ready to socialize... even when my grown up kids need my help, they text me before: it's important, answer my call 😅
I really thought i was the only one
No one:
Introverts by text: why did you call me?
True lol
So true lmao
100% me
I feel attacked. It's too true
Me: you called? Sorry can’t talk on the phone I’m umm at mY gRaNdMaS (actually sitting in my room, just can’t be bothered to talk to you)
I just want to exist peacefully with as little human interaction as possible
I want this to but only when I’m at work.
🤣🤣🤣 my mom says my dad and I need our own little island and I I’ve agreed with her on that 🤣🤣
Me too.
Big Facts
Get laid.
Before I talk to my friends I think of things to talk about before I see them.
I broke up with a guy over this! His constant phone calls were stressing me out so badly! He just couldn't grasp that I when I was alone I truly wanted to be alone and that meant no communication at all. It doesn't help that I'm tone deaf and rely heavily on visual clues to follow a conversation
She thought I am not giving her enough attention 🙃.
My ex sister-in-law called 7 times in one day. I didn’t answer because calls with her typically ended up as long 6-hour therapy sessions about her narcissistic husband or her childhood. I had a similar friend who kept trying to convert me to her religion and got into conspiracy theories. I had to phase them both out of my life.
I have major phone anxiety. For me, it's actually easier to talk in person (even though that can be awkward too).
Agreed
I really hate not having visual clues or not being prepared for what I'm going to say, if I have to receive a call I'd like to know like a week in advance to prepare myself
It’s easier for me to speak in person because awkward silences on the phone are a million times worse than in person, at least the other person can understand that I’m just trying to think of a reply or something to say and that I’ve not left the conversation, the worst thing is when there is an awkward silence and you and the other person then speak at the same time 😣
I'm so glad to know there are others out there like me. I have to build up to making a phone call. If someone calls me it's a worry.
i prefer text but still in person than on a call aha
Introverts don't even hear their phones ring. Why? Because we always use them in Silent Mode, and also in Flight Mode as well so that the only option left to reach us is texting us.
That’s exactly what I do 😆😆😆
That's totally me with putting it on silent, especially in the morning on a weekend. Am usually asleep or just cranky after waking up & feel interrupted. In general just dislike sudden calls. If non work related I schedule time with fam & friends like 'I'll call you around midday' kinda thing & am psychologically prepared for the convo. But give me text any day ~ definitely an introvert there.
My phone is silent 24/7.
I often switch it off, to do something where having it on is not appropriate, and forget to switch it on again.
That doesn’t work when you become an adult and have responsibilities 😭
"Phone rings"
Me, staring at the phone: "But... why?"
Honestly, just text me or write me an email.
Me too!
It’s so great to know there are others out there who feel the same as me about phone calls. I used to think I was the only one and therefore strange. Love videos like this. 👌
The onde thing worse than a phonecall: the *_D O O R B E L L_*
Yes. Pure hijacking of my life and time.
True! Haha
Omg yes!! I pretend I'm not home lol
True. I done answer phonecalls if its not one of my family members and if this person calls me repeatedly then i answer cuz i know its urgent. But doorbells...... when someone rings and I live alone, I stay silent, dont move and pretend to not be home until they leave. One plus is that they cant see my windows and the light coming from inside the room, soooo hehehehehe
@@danidino1645 Definitely! I get maybe 5-15 calls a day. Never answer. I figure if it's important they'll leave a message.
And now it's video chats. The phone was bad enough, but then Satan added video to the whole awful experience.
R.N.K. Alexiadis It sucks having coworkers, who you’ve never met in person. How awkward is it going to be when we actually get to go back to an office?
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂 Finally someone who truly understands this painstaking experience.
:D :D :D
😂😂 true
I swear, sometimes I hallucinate the sound of my ringtone and give myself anxiety. It doesn't help that my ringtone and wake-up alarm were the same for a while. The sound of a text notification makes me nervous as well, but at least I don't have to spend a minute mentally preparing myself for a conversation. Or building up the nerve to hang up or just leaving it to ring, because I do that too. I don't feel good about it, but I do it. Gotta keep my sanity somehow.
I always thought if I am bothering my friends by making a phone call. But now I know that there are millions of people worldwide who can relate to me. I loved this video!
The only think I can think of worse is, someone showing up unannounced at your home😱😱😱
The one reason I like covid shut down. I don't have to invite people in.
My INTP son says the door is terrifying.
I prefer that to a phone call, I'm ok with people in person, it's that thing of not being able to see people that makes me anxious.
Just pretend not to be home.
That happened to me for an entire week, I’m a introvert to an extreme level by the way. It doesn’t help that a lot of my class mates live around where I live, so they naturally know the general vicinity or area where I live. Also sometimes I carpool with friends who live in the area so basically, classmates used to show up to my house unannounced for awhile.
The really terrible people are the ones that text and when you reply, they immediately call you. Why oh why? 🙄😂
But yes, phone calls do get easier with practice.
The worst part is you can't even air it or pretend you didn't see it. *pain.*
hoard of fandead then don’t pretend. Don’t answer either
My mom in a nutshell lol
Yes! 😭
Can you explain why it's bad because it frustrates me when I call someone and know they have the phone right next to them but don't answer. Why?
My phone always on silent 😂, finally someone else who understands.
Mine is on mute All the time! I have been paying a phone bill for 6 months and have made ZERO phone call 🤦🏿♂️🤦🏿♂️🤦🏿♂️ other than my wife once.
both of my parents are extroverted, and once, when I was a kid, they forced me to make a phone call because they thought that I was just being dramatic about not wanting to call anyone like ever. I cried so much after making that phone call, it was the worst. I feel kind of comforted now, however.
My mom would force me to do things that give me a lot of anxiety without even realizing it :
- Calling my hard of hearing great grandfather
- Picking up and signing her Amazon packages.
- Spreading messages to my father when they were in conflict
- Having very important responsibilities
- Going to the grocery store
I always cry whenever my mom forces me to make a phone call
@@callmesam.4502 wdym this is normal stuff, show some respect to your parents and make yourself useful they spend money on you, and you say u have anxiety bc u have to call someone, or go to the store? God damnit
@@gurlsarmymc5270 I never said I didn't do anything for my mom. I do the chores, walk the dog, take care of the kids and give my dad money when he needs it. I'm not ungrateful, I love my mom. And she doesn't spend any money on me anymore. I pay for my food, clothes, electricity, water, internet, room. And I didn't say I have anxiety. I said it gives me anxiety. Also, just because the things she asked gave me anxiety doesn't mean I didn't do it. I know she works hard for her kids and she worked hard for me as well, I would be a b_tch to not give her the help she deserves. And I'm an introvert. Not a b_tch.
@@gurlsarmymc5270 Plus, the whole point of the video you're commenting on is to explain why introverts find voicecalls stressful. That was my point. And, if by saying having super important responsabilities is normal stuff you mean managing our family finances at the age of 15 is normal stuff then I guess I was in fact anxious for nothing. Maybe spreading messages to the guy who abused my mom was in fact no big deal. You never know.
Wait so who else watches this cuz they are introverts and its nice to see that someone out there understands .
Yea I feel like I’m always surrounded by extroverts
this is the exact reson I watch introvert videos on youtube at all
Yeah..
Uhohhotdog Gaming
I feel like I’m surrounded by people who pretend they are introverts even though they are extroverts
yes.
In person, the silence is awkward. In the phone, it's 10 times worse.
Nailed it
The phone becomes heavier. Like your body is telling you "bro you're not okay put it down now!"
Dead air. My primary reason for hating calls.
I disagree
Obviously u super insecure
This translates to Zoom meetings now. I can have up to 3 meetings a day. By the end of it, I'm comatose. I curl up on the sofa with my dog and need to sleep for 45 minutes before I can feel normal again.
I think one of the best inventions of my lifetime has been the text message. People tend to get to their point right away there's no talking over each other no idle chit chat . And you have time to compose your thoughts between receiving and sending back a response less chance of saying something that you would regret later plus there's the benefit of having a written record should there be any dispute about what was said earlier . My voicemail message instructs people to hang up and send a text message instead if they want a response .
Great idea.
Introvert calling someone: please don’t answer, please don’t answer, please don’t answer, hi ! What’s up
yeeeessss
Exactly.
Oh my God!!!!you are totally saying the truth about me.Whenever I'm my mom says that call someone I'm always praying that don't answer!! don't answer!!! And when they answer I'm like :
Bitch!you dumbass why did you answer.
@@shubhashreerath9981 Same
Lol
My introverted self seeing all these relatable comments: *crying* I'm not alone ;_;
There's more of us than we think.
@@dianecelento4974 there's more on the internet because we don't exist irl
Can one of you tell my grandparents that it IS too much to ask that I call them once a year to congratulate them on their birthday, and that it's not just me, and that they could instantly solve that if they had the damn decency to finally get internet and an email address, or perhaps a phone with a text messenger?
I'll... I'll give you their phone number...
Ikr ;-;
Waiting months to make an important call. I hate when asked a question I can’t answer.
And my mom keeps telling me to get a psychologist even if its a phone appointement and she doesnt understand why id prefer to die
Don’t fear it, but I can relate to the preparation, trying to rehearse the call in my head. So much energy.
I prefer writing. That way if I make a mistake, I can simply erase it.
Exactly. I can spend 3 hours rewriting the same email, and then look at it the next day and thank heavens I didn't send it out like that. On the phone, I have a second to think about it, and I consistently mess up every single thing I say.
yes I can agree with that
but I got a question why do you have
نون
as your profile picture?
Yup truee
Exactly!!
The best communication device of all, is the letter. Nothing has improved on the Victorian communication equipment. Pen, ink, Basildon Bond, envelopes, stamp and Pillar Boxes.
For the introverts out there, isn't recording a voice message even harder than talking on the phone? I find it even more challenging.
THAT LANGUAGE TEACHER WHO ALWAYS WANTS VOICE RECORDS AND ME RECORDING LIKE 98 TIMES
Personally I prefer talking on the phone than voice recording
That's easier for me
NEVER know what to say and ending a message is puŕe agony!
I HATE VOICE MESSAGING ITS TERRIBLE!!!!!
This is so accurate. Number 4 is definitely one of the reasons that phonecalls tend to make me anxious. However, it’s also true that it gets easier with practise, which I’ve honestly found to be true for most things I’ve been anxious about.
Yes, when I want to call a friend to catch up or arrange to meet (which is of course rare) it takes me 2 or 3 days to build myself up to making that call. Sometimes weeks.
This is why introverts have other introvert friends that also don’t like talking on the phone and prefer texting.
Yeah me and my friend both talk awkwardly on phone but on text its much comfortable ❤️
Yup lol
Nah most of my friends are extroverts.
Yes true..not comfortable..
So hard to initiate a conversation when both of them are introverts, maybe thats the reason my friends arent introvert at all.
When my phone rings, I’m all, “WHAT KIND OF MONSTER AMBUSHES A PERSON AT TWO O’CLOCK ON A SATURDAY AFTERNOON?” Then I remember that extroverts exist.
HAHAHAHA! good one!
A drunk person, can be extrovert or a very very veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeery drunk introvert that wants to bother you (and knows it), or just an emergency, but nah, most likely a drunk person.
Haha omg this made me bust out laughing. So true though that is me right there.
YES.
So true 😆
This video came at a perfect time because this morning I ignored 2 calls for job offers even tho I'm looking for a job. It's just so draining 😭😭😭😭 really well put FJ! Hopefully I can overcome this too 🤞🏻😂😂
This is me right now. I am actually about to cancel my phone line even though I have a handful of recruiters securing jobs for me 😂😂😂😂 welp!
Haha I did the same thing recently, I mustered up enough strength to talk to one and then ghosted him
I usually do this because most calls are just a number no company name so ignore them. More company’s need to have caller ID if I just see a bunch of numbers I assume it’s just a scam call or someone selling something
you are a great example of how a infj can evolve well above the norms. Plus you are helping others! This is major points.
Finally, someone has put into words exactly how I feel. 100% accurate.
Thats because its finally OK to say your an introvert and wear it. There are far more of us out there than anyone realizes.
I know right
Same here
Me too
same here hahah, everyday struggle as an Infj
repeat after me: PHONE CALLS ARE FOR EMERGENCIES
And Urgencies.....keep them less than 10 mins. ALSO, if the person you're talking to actually responds 3 words or less (especially if that person only hums or give no verbal response) your continuing the conversation is getting annoying. Ask for an honest answer about this and don't show offense if you don't like the response and/or stop talking. Try changing the topic or say Goodbye.
My thoughts exactly. That's what 911 is for.
First was Aristotle, then the Super Pineapple!!! ❤️🙏🏻😂 Thanks!!!
Emergencies and business appointments. Period.
I never have my ringer on. I always say if it's an emergency they will leave a message or call right back.
I only make calls for quick and efficient reasons. Due to this the other person almost always picks up and I didn't notice that until a few people said to me they always answer my calls as they know it's important. A perk for not liking calls ;)
Guy: Just call me whenever you want to talk.
Me: Let's set a specific date and time. Or, you know, text messages are a thing.
And even then, when I get a text, I'm like 'oh great, now I have to answer it, but should I answer it straight away or wait half an hour, cos if I answer it now he'll get back to me and then I'll have to get back to him, and then we're in this endless cycle of torture'.
Recently a former coworker asked when is a good time to call. It’s not that I don’t want to be friends with her but I gave her my honest answer: between 3 PM and 5 PM. I later realized how ridiculous that sounded. I’m OK with talking to her face-to-face but I don’t really want to talk on the phone.
another thing about phone calls…l know it’s a relief when the person you’re calling does not answer the phone. You don’t really want to talk anyway, right? But guess what! Now you have another problem. They’re going to call you back at some random time and you don’t know when. #Intrusive. 🤣🤣🤣
The worst part about receiving calls is how the other person is just reaching into my life, intruding so blatantly and blindly on whatever I'm doing. My mental sanctuary is disrupted and shattered.
Answering-machines & voice-mail systems are a godsend to the introvert. Just leave the thing on all the time, turn the ringer off the phone so that you're not disturbed, and then just periodically check for messages. Screen them looking for important messages (there won't be that many, I guarantee it) & dump the rest. Being able to just hit 'delete' without even having to talk go the person is one of the most sublime satisfactions in the world...
Wow that was such an descriptive explaination
@@MrPGC137 That will just make things worse in the long run.
@@Opuskrokus Explanation, please..
@@MrPGC137 1. You will have the knowledge of not having answered the person hanging over you constantly.
2. If you face your fears and deal with what is hard, it _will_ get better.
The worst part is not being able to formulate spoken thoughts as well as written ones. I forget things when I'm on the spot.
Yes. I am a Grand Master at "What I should have said was....."
@@lesnyk255 I'm always "uuuuuhhh"ing like I have the intelligence of a fish.
@@UmatsuObossa I can barely stumble through a conversation, but once I get to speak in written form it's like Shakespeare entered the building, lmao.
I hate that.
Yep!
can't even begin to explain how true each line in this video is
True. Especially the part about feeling like you're bothering people if you talk to them.
When someone calls me, the only thing I'm thinking about is how to end the converstion ._.
😂😂😂 same
Same, i even sometime pretend to have a weak signal so i can faster end the phonecall and get things done with text
Better. When someone calls me, I think of a reason NOT to answer it at the time and allow them to leave a message.
I just answer in the most boring way so they just end it
Same, just want to know the point of the call after that, it is so draining to engage in chit-chat. Such a waste of time.
Text: Sorry I missed your call...
Reality : Staring at the phone while it rings and waiting for it to stop
@@anuragsosa Every time. If it's important, they'll leave a message. 😳
And then they call back
@@tojislefttoe7505 lol...right?!!
🤣🤣
@@amidthesalt that's our way of life. "if it's important they will leave a message" great minds think alike
I had a desk job that involved receiving and directing calls constantly while also being given too much work to accomplish. Absolutely the worst. Then I had a job where I had to make some calls, received fewer, but either way it was directly related to my own work that only I was doing. Much much easier to not constantly be on the phone, make the calls when I was ready and to know everything I needed to know when making or receiving the calls. Two very different degrees of tolerance. Having more control helped immensely!!
"Why are you still talking to me??"
Every phone conversation with my mother ever. I love her, but I need a nap after her two hour phone marathons.
FJ: Introverts like to be prepared...
Me: nodding vigorously
Yesssss
😂That's the only reason for me
Same :) Nodding all through this video!
This just popped up in my recommendations and wow, this describes me to a T. I used to feel a lot of phone anxiety when I was younger. Nowadays, I'm okay with using the phone at work, but I still have to mentally prep myself before making a phone call; I even keep a notepad around just to jot down everything that I want to say. And even doing something simple like ordering pizza, I rehearse my order in my head so I don't end up tripping over my words when I'm "live".
This channel not only is filled with hilarious videos, but it helps me know how to explain myself to people on how I'm intoverted xD And helps be better understand myself
when my phone rings i’m like “who still uses their phone as a phone??” lol
😂😂😂
Umm me:)
My parents and in-laws. If my phone rings, I mostly know it’s them for that reason! Although now I just expect bad news when they call...not an introvert thing, but a conditioned response 😕
@@katannep7798 my father is 73 and uses WhatsApp more than a teenager LOL
Phone: rings
Introvert: "I feel personally attacked right now" 😆😅
Same 😂😂😂😂😂
🤦🏽♀️why a you calling ?Just text me👌🏾
Samee! I hate when the phone rings! 🤣
Imagine extroverts reading all these top comments and interprating them as exaggerated jokes when they are literally the truth
That's funny!
😄😄😄
Watching this while staring at the notification of the missed call from my auntie and considering texting my old boss. You nailed these seven reasons actually particularly for video calls
I'm very thankful for texting and automated answering systems. I don't mind pressing a series of numbers as long as I don't have to talk to anyone.
If I respond to your text and you immediately call me because you know I have my phone in my hand; I'm calling the police!
Lol I just don't answer. I've told some people I am hard of hearing.
@@dianecelento4974 😂hard of hearing!
Yes. That kills me
OMG people that do that, they are mental and overstepping boundaries lol I hate that!!!
Ahahahaa!!
Does anyone else here despise the mere sound of a ringing phone?
Seriously, I wish I could just show this vid to everyone I know. About a dozen loved ones are furious with me about my phone idiosyncrasy. Another dozen think I'm angry with them because I don't call.
Extroverts take these things way too seriously.
Now I have soft music on my ringphone,,,,so it does not stress me so.
Why should they be forced to do things your way because it makes you feel uncomfortable? Have you considered that someone may be calling you because they want to hear your voice because a text or email is cold and distant to them?
Being an extrovert doesn’t mean you aren’t shy or worry about saying something stupid in person, it just means you gain energy around people. Just being around people is great even if you don’t speak a word just hearing what others have to say.
This video so helped me understand why I feel the way I do. I have ADHD and was convinced that was the reason I hate the phone so much. The worst of all are the damn telemarketers, I am on the do not call registry yet still receive at least 4-6 calls a day. So glad to know now why I want to unplug the landline and put cell on do not disturb all day everyday!
i find i have to keep changing the ring tone to reduce the anxiety of it ringing
@@glasscity3104 thank you, I will give it a try 👍😎
Yep this describes the phone anxiety thing perfectly.
Uch, my parents used to force me to call my friends on a weekly basis and invite them to do something in order to make me more sociable. And one of my ex's LOVED talking on the phone. We easily had 2-3 hour conversations over the phone, much to my horror. Well, I listened, they talked. It drove me out of my damn mind.
It is therapy for me that someone understands how hard it is to call someone.
Yaasss! And he can joke about it too. It makes me feel normal.
Hitting that dial button to me takes a lot more courage than jumping out of an airplane. I've done both. Would choose the airplane every time. Not even joking.
Totally nailed it with introverts worry that they are irritating others by initiating conversations. I do tend to feel I'm doing my friends and family a favor by leaving them alone.
It's a win win because they will leave you alone in return
Me Too!!!
I don't even like to order takeout by phone. Food delivery in the COVID age - Doordash, et al. YES! just fill out the menu form and click send! NO CONTACT DELIVERY! :-D
This is one of the most accurateness information videos I have EVER come across. It's almost eerie. The ones that resonate with my the most are #1, #4, #5, #6, #7.
I'm gonna show this to my therapist. I haven't been able to make phone calls to anyone except my mom and my sister for 15 years. And I mean NO PHONE CALLS for 15 years. It's really a problem, and I didn't know how to explain it. But the fact you can't see the other person, worry about miscommunication and how draining it is as an introvert are important points. I don't think I will ever get over it. Once I had to call an ambulance, but I was so high on adrenaline then, and other than that I'm just not able to make calls.
You forgot the akward silence and how they say “say something” when you have nothing to talk about.
True
That is the WORST part!
Worse is that when you do talk, no one really wants to go deep into a topic. All the nuance and complexities. As if they just want to just talk and repeat the same scripts.
Sooooooo True....😂😭
Same happens with me everytime...😩
Worst part !!!
This man is talking FACTS about introverts.
straight up FACTS
yeah, i think he is an introvert too
Helps me understand my introverteee
He must be an introvert himself
@@lynisdumb I also hate phone calls😑. I only use it to meet people . I am much more comfortable in real life face to face interactions.
Iam invisible,why don't they see that?🎉
Thank you SO MUCH for this video, I can finally explain, put into words what I feel the distress of receiving a phone call or having to give one.
My family doesn't understand that, and I've been yelled at many times because I just don't answer... while I'm just freaked out, and very stressed... and my emotions getting the best of me (hey INFP here) it just ends up in a conflict that worsens everything.
I had to put melodies that give me strength (like Pirates of the Caribbean and Hawaii 5-0 theme songs) as ringtones to help myself answering...
I used to work in a customer service department...I had to answer the phone over a hundred times a day. It was hell. My next job I didn't even have a phone at my desk...it was heaven.
I can’t even handle when people leave voice messages. It’s been 3 days since a friend left one and I’m still preparing myself to listen to it and reply
Haha. My sister in law always leaves a message for me on my birthday. It's always the nicest thing but for some reason it makes me so nervous. It usually takes at least a day to go listen. That's so weird I do that.
i thought i was the only one. People keep judging me for it and i just cant bring myself to say "i cant deal with it"
HOLY F*CK 😳 L O L this makes me feel sooooo much more normal ! 😅 I cannot deal with spur-of-the-moment phone calls so I always send them to voicemail, and then I literally don’t have the mental energy to deal with listening to the message and calling them back, so the message stays there unlistened for days or weeks and I feel increasingly guiltier and guiltier for: 1) sending their call to VM in the first place 2) bring rude by not listening and calling them back - ie now I’m ignoring them! 🤦♀️
I want to delete VM option all together, but I do need it for my business and appointments and stuff 😑
I respond to voicemails with a text like a normal human being. "You call?"
That's me right there like your comment said. I put the voice mail thingy set at the highest number of calls I can set it to (caller might give up and hang up lol). I even tried to get the company I have the internet/phone/cable bundle with to take off the voice mail thing, but they said its easier to just leave it the way it is. Voice mail makes me nervous lol.
I always feel embarrassed on the phone like I’m gonna sound dumb. The worst part about phone call for me is when there’s echo and I can hear me talk 😵
The worst!!!
I hate hearing my voice on a recording because, to me, I sound terrible.
I remember having a answering machine years ago, and trying to make a message with my voice for the caller to leave a message, I tried a bunch of times and every time I played it back thought I sounded like a
complete idiot , because I would stammer and forget what I was saying or my message sounded nervous and rushed , finally I just gave up and used the default robot voice that the unit already had
Agree..I want to record my voice but end up delete it bcz I didn't want to hear..huhu weird right
@@Strdh_511 No, not weird in the slightest. I'm the same way.
Thank you so much for this.
It feels so good to know others understand me and I'm not alone in this!
Damn!!! You my guy!!! I love you for this!!!!❤❤❤❤❤❤ Thank you for sharing it with the world! I would've never been able to do it myself, so well explained!! This world needs more people like you!!❤❤❤ (side note: I was at start of the video feeling very anxious like the ground was sinking beneath my feet but eventually I was fine!)
It can be hard to end the call with some people who just want to keep talking on and on. It can feel hard to just say “I have to go now bye” 😬
@Pabz 😂🤣😂🤣 I laughed so hard at this comment HAHA bc it has happened to me and in my head I'm like ok well f*ck u 2 then. So then when they eventually call me back, usually on how to fix a problem (research related, job related, need a connection, or even dating advice, etc) I say I dunno. I have to go. Buh-bye 👋 Karma baby 😎 ~ 💖 ESFJ
yeah true so i just lie that my mom wants me to come down to eat haha
I used to have that problem, but I stopped caring. I tell people when they get my number that I hate phone calls, so I don't feel bad when I've already allowed you to keep my here for half an hour to be gracious.
Sometimes I have a hard time even saying that in text. I don't want it sound like "I don't want to talk to your ass anymore. Bye."
Yeah
I’m an introvert working at a call center. I’m still trying to adapt .
I’m forced to talk to you for money, if it wasn’t for that I’d find something else.
I learned to 'n t fear the phone at work because I worked in a call centre and then in retail. I still feel like a call on my cell phone is a personal attack tho. I never answer my phone. In fact my phone is always on silent unless I'm expecting an important call.
To not fear*
@@d.r429 I kind of get annoyed when family/friends want to talk on the phone . The thought of talking on the phone for hours is exhausting. Even texting sometimes Is exhausting. I feel bad but mostly I just ignore. But I don’t do that to my mom. If I don’t text her back within 3 mins she’s calling.
I'm support engineer.
Yes, trust me.
I really can connect with everything you said on this topic. It’s taken me a long time to come to the realization that I have certain anxiety issues and that I’m an introvert. I always knew I was very different from most people around me but didn’t know why exactly. It’s great to find discussions on these sorts of topics and to hear about others similar feelings and situations. I have worked retail for the majority of my working life, I don’t prefer it but I’m good at it. As much as I don’t like being around people or conversing with them very much I have learned to adapt and be ok with starting a conversation or helping a complete stranger and taking and making lots of phone calls. I think what helped was doing this sort of thing as teenager before I realized my anxieties and before they got worse. Now as an adult I’m just use to it and can go with it from all the practice I’ve had.
Well, you really nail it when mentioning the absence of facial cues, when on a phone, esp. once we've learned to appreciate the gift of extraverted intuition. Those who have it pick up so much non-verbally during face to face interactions (like how quickly they can end when one of us starts to turn away!).
The ONLY people I'm comfortable talking to over the phone are my mum and dad. Our calls last for a maximum of 18 seconds (yes I've kept track)
That's so me!
Oh damn same here
My mom only calls me to ask me when I'm coming home or scold me if I'm late
And my dad calls me if he wants me to buy something while I'm out
But i still hate those calls😂
my shortest call with my fam lasted a second. We talk fast and short 😂
Glad to see a lot of people relate! :)
My wife has to notify me at least a day ahead of time of a social engagement, so I have time to psych myself up for the occasion.
@@SirenaSpades Sometimes, for really major stuff, a year is still not enough time.
i need like 2 - 3 days, but even then I'm still not ready lol
One time my friends held a surprise birthday party for me. My mom knew I hated surprises, so she warned me ahead of time.
Magic Unicorn because that's what heroes do
Sorry this made me laugh, I hope you don’t mind.
All of these reasons are spot on and #6 particularly resounds with me
Spot on. It's difficult for someone to understand you can go through this. You soon are labeled anti social which is false and then you really feel worse and judged..also dismissed. Introverts just need more time to prepare. It's an equilibrium disruption. Thanks for speaking about this. It can be debilitating if not handled with compassion. Funny you said we can't end the conversation.. how true.
I don't mind talking to people in person. Heck, I can even start a conversation with a total stranger. But phone calls? No, just no.
Me too, it's easy to start conversation with strangers but not with phone calls lol
Texts are clear and get to the point usually
Yeah, what is that?? I love talking to people in person.
Same here. Usually I don't answer a phone call from a stranger. Sometimes I call them back later when I am mentally prepared, sometimes I just don't.
Same here.
Me: ignores a phone call
Also me: types lengthy emails in detail to communicate efficiently and effectively than talking verbally
Even my texts are long. :P
Again, one more thing I thought I was the only one, I write bibles in almost everything, in my comments on YT there's always 'read more' 😂
@@berchyzgb4423 Even my texts are novels! :O
My emails are short usually but that's because I'll spend two weeks editing a two sentence reply until it's perfect. Any longer than that and it just never gets sent because by the time I'm ready to hit send it's three months later and no longer relevant lol
I do this. Because if I get it right enough and clear enough, they hopefully won't be calling or texting for clarification. Again. It's worth the extra 20 minutes in the first place not to have to deal with another demand later.
Yes! There's nothing I hate more than being interrupted and put into a long conversation that I don't want to have. Like when I've got nothing going on that day and I'm just sitting in my room watching TH-cam recharging my social batteries (or at least that's the excuse I give myself, though there's nothing to really recharge from😅) and then my mom walks in and interrupts my video to talk about my life, how things are going and what my plans are, and "don't you think you're spending a little too much time on TH-cam?" Ugh! I should say, I very much love my mom, and I don't think I have a right to be angry about that kind of thing, but for whatever reason it just raises my hackles.
I love this videos explanation- especially the held hostage reason. So relatable.
And i thought i was the only weirdo who would reply to a phone call with text message. :(
No, you’re far from it! I even know some extroverts who are not really fans of phone calls!
No, you're not the only one who does that! Lots of people do!
NO!
You should be absolutely appreciated for it : )
You're not alone buddy, you're not alone .. :')
theddfreak Nope... not at all! Right there with you. On the flip side, what’s worse are the people who respond to emails, IM’s and texts with a phone call (cringe).
Me: receives call
Me: stares at the phone
*Phone call ends*
Me : Hey, sorry, missed your call. Can't talk right now (I absolutely can) can you text me what it was?
Them : Oh, never mind, it's not important
...
S A M E why can't you just text me? Its so much EASIER
I really really really hate when this happens
You should never _ever_ give in into the phone calls. The MOMENT YOU DO, they will take that as a cue to always call 😩
@@NervousNoodles how right you are
This grinds my gears to no end… I literally wanna strangle the people who do this
100% agree with all of this...lol...i am a graphic designer who works for herself and try to encourage my clients to email me, but most of them feel more comfortable talking on the phone for some reason. Lol... so if it is necessary to them I really try to PLAN a time frame for the phone call. I need to mentally prepare, and also hope that we stick to the time frame so it doesnt take the whole day and so I can actually work...
I feel like i go outside of my comfort zone to make others comfortable, in many situations, and I feel proud of myself when I am able to accomplish doing that, and I reward myself by going into hiding right after. 🤣
I freaking love you man, fellow infj, thanks for sharing yourself