I’m probably socially anxious in about 60-70% of my interactions, at times I can be the most outgoing, friendly person & I have moments when I can be present & just allow things to happen. Does anyone else feel the same?
Yes! I am just like that, as well. That’s what makes my social anxiety so confusing. Sometimes I can be really charismatic and comfortable in my own skin, and other times, I feel like an alien in my own body. 🍃☀️🍃
Yes, even in chatting with sales associates or in very "benign" or random situations with people I will probably never see again. I am very aware of how I tense up my body.
@@sharifashahsahen8485 Nope the worse is the introvert with social anxiety. He's by nature not liking too luch social interaction at once and he's more handicapped with the social anxiety.
Finally someone who understands what social anxiety is and gives useful tips instead of saying: "So you feel nervous around people? Just socialize more and be more confident!" ... yeahh, suuure, it's just that easy *sigh*
6 Tips For Dealing With Social Anxiety: 1) Remember everyone is self-conscious 2) Pause to examine the evidence 3) Imagine the worst-case scenario 4) Remind yourself anticipation is worse than reality 5) Bring a cheat sheet 6) Consider getting help
It's too bad this type of content wasn't available when I was in high school. My life could have followed a completely different trajectory. My parents were way too hands off and never opened up or expressed availability. The result was that I did not feel comfortable talking about my problems in my own home, and if I did, I was not provided any meaningful help. Thankfully I had the internet so I was able to find out what was going on with me, but there wasn't any quality content on TH-cam that provided clarity. All that was on TH-cam back then were other young people with Social Anxiety talking about their experience. It gave a sense of not being alone, but did not provide any meaningful level of clarity. Today, 9 years later, I've recovered 90% from where I was. This is thanks to life experience, cognitive behavioral therapy, and insane amounts of research. Unfortunately the lack of early intervention has caused me to miss out on immeasurable skill building experiences and have a lot of catching up to do. Thankfully today I have an aggressive growth mindset and therefore still have a chance of not dying in a state of regret. Vanessa, thank you for what you do. The ripple effect of your work has, and will continue to make an immense positive impact on humanity.
Your story totally resonates with me. I always found my home to be very emotionally suffocating environment. People around me were just constantly fixing me instead of bonding with me. Thank God I married to a person who gets me, who gave me the space to recover myself from emotional suffocation.
@@fatimasamira3695 That's great to hear Fatima, the "fixing me instead of bonding" really resonates with my experience. I can feel myself claming up whenever i sense something about what i should do is about to be brought up because they are gonna tell me what do instead of asking me what i'm going through.
I suppose one of my safety behaviors is taking off my glasses during presentations. By doing so, I'm unable to see everyone clearly which makes me feel extreamly at ease.
It helps to watch these kinds of videos because it makes you feel less alone! I’ve had very bad social anxiety my whole life and I can honestly say it’s getting better! I’m starting to accept myself as I am!
i love that for you i want to get better too by speaking my mind and saying what i want and not think about what the other person might think and not overthink, things
I can’t believe how well you just summed up social anxiety. It took me the first 23 years of my life and 5 years of therapy to figure all this out. We desperately need to educate people on this, especially the school systems, intervening while social anxiety is in the early stages will save a child years of suffering.
I really need this. The most horrible part in anxiety is that as you told I can't physically see them or hear them and can't make eye contact. It makes me awkward and I ask them like, "Sorry, can you repeat this?" like after each statements. And the eye contact thing, ugh... so anxious.... But I do have confidence and excitement like to talk to them.... but the anxious ruin everything.
A mindfulness component along with CBT would be a better alternative than just CBT because mindfulness practice can help detach oneself from unnecessary information like someone’s negative facial expression or negative talk from seeming like a big deal.
I was someone that had social anxiety so bad that I couldnt even look in the mirror, btw it was due to abuse from my parents telling me I was no one and that no one would love me, that stayed with me for awhile. But now Im able to have conversations and people are starting to like me although I dont have any friends, Im better off than I was a year ago.
This makes a lot of sense. I work as a customer service person, and I definitely get anxiety in the situation of angry customers. It causes me a bright red face, shaking, and weak voice. It's not fun, but this video makes it make sense. Thank you Vanessa!
Thanks Vanessa I have like extreme social anxiety and it has caused me to live half a life underachieving in so many ways I cannot even begin to explain. Appreciate your video so much!
I was told by someone that I sounded incoherent and that I babbled. I have to admit, that messed with my head. Now I doubt everything I want to say, it's so frustrating. Not only do I feel anxious but I feel like the most underachieved in the bunch. ❤
This is one of the top videos I've seen from you. As someone who is affected by it I appreciate you are addressing this topic. I recently got attacked and was put down by a person because of my anxiety but as I learned from your previous videos I cut this toxic person out of my life.
I blush while at work. People have noticed it. Two woman saw me and gave me a nasty smirk, another one let me know I was red and said it so loud that even others turned around to check. People are actually judging me and I can see them staring at me now. I have to stay in the same place at work for 12 hours whilst I pack merchandise. I can't stop turning red. I have to keep my eyes down cause if I notice anyone looking at me I blush. My head hurts, my hands sweat, my heart starts to beat so fast that I can even hear it over the loud music playing. I tear a little while at my station and I tell myself that it's all in my head but I can't seem to shut it off. At the end of the day I cry in the car before heading back home. I can't even enjoy my days off because I know I will have to go back to work and do it all over again, I get depressed so badly.
Thank you, Vanessa! I needed this. I believe I have localized social anxiety. I didn't know there were different types. I want to like this a million times. I need therapy. I will check out joyable.
A little nervous? More like terribly nervous. You have a new subscriber! Thank you for sharing your story. I resonate so much with everything you were talking about. I look forward to seeing more of your videos!
I just decided that I don't care if everyone doesn't like me. Even a few times someone would tell me that a certain person didn't like me, and I'd be like "Whatever" - LOL it'a very liberating. We all want to be liked but life is too short to spend my time worrying that someone dislikes me. I've noticed, though, that given a little more time and a chance to get to know me, they can change their mind, so if it bothers you that much, just have a few conversations with the person, if opportunity presents itself, and take a genuine interest in thgem by asking questions....yuo'd be surprised how that can change a person's mind.
I love how you have managed to link science to everyday social anxiety experiences. This explanation is the best I have heard, and I can use these tips immediately. Thank you
one of the best way to overcome it is actually act like u're a socially dynamic person, learn how to be it, instead of being self-conscious of ur own inability.
You are a lifesaver! I can’t talk to people and keep on feeling guilty about making them feel anxious or bad with my “rudeness,” and I tend to read other people’s anxiety stories instead of getting help which doesn’t really help in the long run. So I really, REALLY need this and i’m extremely thankful to you because i feel progressive. It was like a blessing (lol) to see this video on my homepage ❤️
Vanessa Van Edwards Vanessa‼️‼️ This made my day (i just woke up but embarassingly cried last night. I cried tears of joy in the morning because of seeing this reply 🤣). Your content ALREADY helps me a lot and i know it will continue to. I’ve learnt so much from you and you are one of the people who made me passionate about psychology, specifically reading other people. I hope you are having a wonderful day! 🤗❤️
What a great video, I've suffered with social anxiety for like 25 years now and probably gone about it the worst way possible learning to live with it and not seaking help which over the years has just made it worse and worse. I've found myself watching lots of videos like this trying to learn about the brain psychology and diet to try and understand what's going on inside my head. Watching this short video gave me loads of info and ideas to use 10/10 from me, like and subscribe a definate. Thank you!!
I cut anxiety farts. My anxiety flatulence happens to be extremely foul. They are the type that gurgle real low and are very gassy and sound like a door creaking and they REEK like a combination of fresh diarrhea, hard boiled eggs and nachos. The aroma kinda creeps up. They feel like the type that should reek but you don’t smell anything until about 5 seconds or so, and then BAM. Gets right in your sinuses and begins to choke you. The aroma seems to permeate as it lingers until it’s like a bomb went off and everything within a certain radius is going to reek of the inside of my lower middle intestine....
Thank you so much, this is video is really helpful for me. I am finding solutions right now to manage my social anger at work. You are an inspiration for me
Wow. That totally just one hundred percent described me top to bottom. I am grateful for the opportunity to find a way through. Thanks Vanessa. You are awesome.
Thank you so much Vanessa! Really needed this. I've dealt with social anxiety the majority of my life, and it's proven to be a formidable foe. When I found your channel I had finally decided to challenge it, and once again, this video came at just the time I needed, and has helped to pick me up from a particularly low point. Please keep up the hard work! 🤗 Edit: Grammar 👀
The worst for me are (actually, the only ones) - bring in the center of attention (especially on my birthday; for a couple of years I stopped celebrating it because I felt too stressed out and I still plan to keep this) - eating or drinking in front of others, even on special ocasions (people don't understand this and keep forcing me wich makes things even worse) - talking to my crush (but I try my best to keep it together) You really help me work on it. Thank you really much!
I am an avid #MentalHealthAwareness advocate and performer, and I love this so much. I travel the country trying to bring that awareness on stages, in classrooms, hospitals, and on my TH-cam channel, so I get excited when I see other advocates. 💙❤
Micky Damon haha maybe I should reword that xD you're right. Doesn't mean I have to be formal 24/7 thought, right? ;) I'm just trying to compliment her
I have characteristics of both localized and generalized social anxiety, cause i can talk to people I've know for awhile but if i am the center of attention or someone idk tries to talk to me i will freak out
This video is a revalation. They should show this in hi school to help people survive it !!! Could help so many people!! I had a lot of anxiety in hi school but couldnt rationalize it or understand it or how to deal with it. I hated school for the most part, because of anxiety. I felt alone and no one was there to help me because I didnt know how to communicate my feelings to anyone. This video exactly describes everything I went through.
I seriously have localized anxiety, Thank God that I came across this video cause I didn't know why am always like this, but now I understand and I want to overcome it, please help . Am Faridah
I'm 53 years old and I have been experiencing social anxiety since age 15. I have gone to therapy over the years and I have slowly progressed a little but I still find myself in anxious situations.
Wish I would have never went to a shrink about this 20 years ago. Funny thing was the therapist actually made a remark about, it's probably best not going to see a Psychiatrist over this. But I went anyway. Long story short, I was put on Benzodiazapines, Clonazapam. Back then some Dr's thought it wasn't addictive, or not really addictive. Been on it for 20 years. Tried coming off about 4 times, but the withdrawal syndrome is beyond words, and doesn't get better in 2-3 weeks like alot of other drugs. My Social Anxiety wasn't really that bad, just in certain situations. But just a heads up to other's out there. Stay away from these types of drugs, and if you do need them, they are only meant for short term use. Because getting off them can be nearly impossible.. And it will effect you're brain, and everything about you over the long run.
Benzos are actually harder more of a withdraw than Percocet, good luck to you and God bless..I suffer from depression and anxiety of all kinds social whatever never know how to act.. It hope worse once I had my baby in October, I have not felt the same since..I left my job postpardum but never went back and have to totally avoid my job and nervous if I see the ppl I worked with cuz what will I say? I'm a mess 😭
People with social anxiety were raised in prefectionist cultures that are higly intolerant. There is epidemic of social anxiety in countries like Switzerland, Germany and Austria because they have very tight social norms.
I have several social anxiety to the point where I try to avoid people all together I start thinking there not going to like me or there going to judge me and be mean I even think people are stareing at me and talking about me even when there not I try to not make eye contact my heart starts pounding I get sweaty and clam up.
Yeah im actually considered as sovial anxiety and i lovr it cause i know wveytime i encounter such tension i know that im growing hope this will be tattooed in my mind.
Thank you so much for your hard work Vanessa! I'm ready to read your book 'captivate' and take back control over my life after years of suffering from social anxiety 💪
Was with a group of friends and stumbled over my words when I spoke, and a guy in the group told me I needed to meditate :'(. I mean it's true but people DO notice your awkwardness, unlike what Vanessa said about people barely noticing or brushing it off.
My mind goes blank and that puts me into flight or fight mode which causes me to panic as I can't think, it's like the brain shuts down. This happened on a course I was on 2 months ago. I'm on another course next week. This time I have the beta blockers ready and am now using high strength CBD oil. I hope I can get through this as it will improve my confidence. I've suffered with anxiety for 10 years and tried CBT , hypnotherapy, acupuncture , councling and meditation including medications. It's so deeply rooted and as I don't sleep well the tiredness multiplies my anxiety. I think I have a fear of being judged
Thank you my great teacher I'm so interested on what you are give us its so useful information and the way that you are introduce it is awesome thanks from my hared. Keep going god bless you .
Look I'm not understanding what the socially anxious or politically anxious people do that leads to stress and that stress in turn make someone depressed and depression leads to mental disbalance if not taken care of properly and helpful people are always there, however faraway they are, to stretch their hands out to get out of these and Venessa, thank you a lot for showing the way how to get out and keep oneself remain in themselves. But the million dollar question is how can you get out of these when the physician needs help from getting out of his own psychological sociopolitical anxieties and you are nowhere but to observe and follow what is inevitable for the kind of situation. Possibility is a factor we cannot reject but probability when least, you are nowhere but to surrender helplessly because you are not me and everyone's point of view when different you can hardly believe a cure is there because there's nobody here without a purpose of his own and nobody jumps out to stretch their hands before you are asked. We see, even feel that somebody is in dire situation but we better advice what to do but a real good slap is only a little medicine anybody powerful easily can do will never turn up to put down all these farce. Nevertheless I will try to make your advice spread although I have little repertory to do that. Merry Christmas and take care.
drinking to feel more comfortable HAHAHAHA you got me right there. i remembered that one event i have to perform a dance during my friend’s debut i drank alot to ease my thoughts and nervousness lol
I am an awkward turtle at parties... unless I hit the weed or have s few drinks.... I generally hate small talk. I have recently had trouble... I have an attractive doctor and developed a small crush 😳 it's giving me the worst social anxiety....i kind of dread my next appointment and look forward to it at the same time.... When I was younger I used to get terrible anxiety getting on the school bus also when drinking in front of friends or going to the loo at my friends house wtf anxiety sucks. Forget public speaking or going onstage during assembly. I self medicated with weed for a long time . Am only just realizing what is wrong with me at 35 years old.... My heart goes out to anyone who gets it all the time.
I wanted to point out I don't fear being judged like, I'm not actively aware of what it is that I'm doing people particularly my Mother is judging me for but it does happen days later when she goes you know that thing you did? Sometimes I have thought about avoiding her and when I go into a social setting when she is present I have also thought before going in there I can't be myself but then I just think am I crazy? No I'm not doing that. So I actively get judged, by what I wear, will openly say she don't like my hair. How I should be more tactful. The fact that others can't take jokes but when others do its hilarious. Sometimes I wonder why I bother going. Telling me I can't say that, or something else, when I ask a question I will say the person's name I'm speaking to and I'm told it's making them uncomfortable etc and it's like a whole list of things I can't or shouldn't do, I can't remember all of that, so I don't. The more authenticity I show my family the more they can and will judge
Video in line with what SA is all about, so kudos for doing the research. I personally use worksheets and I found that combining CBT with REBT principles brings best results for me. I still struggle with authority at work, but I am working on it. Getting help is very expensive for me at the moment.
I have this problem that I can't say someone's name. It's like every time I havd to say their name, I feel like " now we aren't there yet" I feel like someone name is reserved. And I know that it's all nonsense , but my subconscious brain is hard wired to it. I have never seen anyone else who had this problem. What could this be? I've googled it but I didn't find anything. Please help. It is really causing trouble.
I just quit my job because of social anxiety disorder. I had a crush on a girl at work but it was to painful to go every day and l couldn't talk to her. The thing about it she actually showed interest in me.
Thank you Vanessa .I think I have OCD as well .i have this neagtive obsessive thoughts all the time .I live in my head and I feel life is passing me by .help
Sending love ❤ Here are some articles you may find helpful: www.scienceofpeople.com/the-war-inside-our-brains/ www.scienceofpeople.com/mindfulness-activities/ www.scienceofpeople.com/meditation-benefits/ www.scienceofpeople.com/how-to-clear-your-mind/
My social anxiety is more severe than you explained. But you did share a few helpful things. It makes me realize how much worse I've gotten. I have now developed agoraphobia and my body contorts uncontrollably. Along with uncontrollable facial expressions. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm just alone all the time.
I'm sorry to hear this! I'm glad there were at least a few helpful tips in the video. You may find there are some more helpful ones in this article: www.scienceofpeople.com/biggest-fears/
Chill i Dont get eye contact and people are mad we have to work on ourself and be better that's it we are humans and overcome anything when in pain and it's more in pain i loose eye contact that's normal don't worry u will do some yoga and be happy u will be fine in little time
I blank out and sometimes a complete panic attack. At a wedding I panicked and ran right by the bride done the isle to get outside.....I have to drink to calm down....now I don’t go out...I am getting help....
I don't know if this will help anyone because I notice I am just not very grounded when I have an anxious reaction, but the worst thing to do is to hold the breath and lift/tense the shoulders.
Want more on social anxiety?
👉 www.scienceofpeople.com/social-anxiety/
I’m probably socially anxious in about 60-70% of my interactions, at times I can be the most outgoing, friendly person & I have moments when I can be present & just allow things to happen. Does anyone else feel the same?
You’re not alone girl.
Same. It depends on the people I am with though.
Im like that too! I don't know why certain interactions intimidate me so much, there's no rational reason, it's really frustrating, right?
Yes! I am just like that, as well. That’s what makes my social anxiety so confusing. Sometimes I can be really charismatic and comfortable in my own skin, and other times, I feel like an alien in my own body.
🍃☀️🍃
Yes, even in chatting with sales associates or in very "benign" or random situations with people I will probably never see again. I am very aware of how I tense up my body.
"I'm a recovering awkward person." - I like that. 🤣
Me too lol
I’m an introvert with social anxiety
same. plus I'm awkward :/
I'm an ambivert with social anxiety. The worst feeling is when I'm in an extroverted mood but can't get out of the house.
I am extroverted with social anxiety, it is so much worse
Same and people don't like me because they think I'm unfriendly
@@sharifashahsahen8485 Nope the worse is the introvert with social anxiety. He's by nature not liking too luch social interaction at once and he's more handicapped with the social anxiety.
Finally someone who understands what social anxiety is and gives useful tips instead of saying: "So you feel nervous around people? Just socialize more and be more confident!" ... yeahh, suuure, it's just that easy *sigh*
6 Tips For Dealing With Social Anxiety:
1) Remember everyone is self-conscious
2) Pause to examine the evidence
3) Imagine the worst-case scenario
4) Remind yourself anticipation is worse than reality
5) Bring a cheat sheet
6) Consider getting help
+Alex Kurty Thank you
Thank youuuu
Great tips, thanks
Facts
Number 2 funny, thats what feel when have social anxiety, no tips
This video made me feel anxious.
Kyle Symbouras same here jesus
@@Naforbe same jfc
My heart rate increased and i felt anxious too
Same :\
SAME
It's too bad this type of content wasn't available when I was in high school. My life could have followed a completely different trajectory. My parents were way too hands off and never opened up or expressed availability. The result was that I did not feel comfortable talking about my problems in my own home, and if I did, I was not provided any meaningful help. Thankfully I had the internet so I was able to find out what was going on with me, but there wasn't any quality content on TH-cam that provided clarity. All that was on TH-cam back then were other young people with Social Anxiety talking about their experience. It gave a sense of not being alone, but did not provide any meaningful level of clarity. Today, 9 years later, I've recovered 90% from where I was. This is thanks to life experience, cognitive behavioral therapy, and insane amounts of research. Unfortunately the lack of early intervention has caused me to miss out on immeasurable skill building experiences and have a lot of catching up to do. Thankfully today I have an aggressive growth mindset and therefore still have a chance of not dying in a state of regret. Vanessa, thank you for what you do. The ripple effect of your work has, and will continue to make an immense positive impact on humanity.
Neuro Pulse aweh im sorry to hear that about u hun
Your story totally resonates with me. I always found my home to be very emotionally suffocating environment. People around me were just constantly fixing me instead of bonding with me. Thank God I married to a person who gets me, who gave me the space to recover myself from emotional suffocation.
Please share your recovery steps.
@@fatimasamira3695 That's great to hear Fatima, the "fixing me instead of bonding" really resonates with my experience. I can feel myself claming up whenever i sense something about what i should do is about to be brought up because they are gonna tell me what do instead of asking me what i'm going through.
It's as if I was reading about myself. Great that you've made such progress.
I suppose one of my safety behaviors is taking off my glasses during presentations. By doing so, I'm unable to see everyone clearly which makes me feel extreamly at ease.
Josie Lazo That actually sounds like a good idea.
Yes this is a good idea
I actually do this oh my god
I started doing that as a child, it really works
I should try that.
It helps to watch these kinds of videos because it makes you feel less alone! I’ve had very bad social anxiety my whole life and I can honestly say it’s getting better! I’m starting to accept myself as I am!
i love that for you i want to get better too by speaking my mind and saying what i want and not think about what the other person might think and not overthink, things
I can’t believe how well you just summed up social anxiety. It took me the first 23 years of my life and 5 years of therapy to figure all this out.
We desperately need to educate people on this, especially the school systems, intervening while social anxiety is in the early stages will save a child years of suffering.
Yes!! How do you feel now? Is there any tips on overcoming it? I really need to get over it I’m 22
I really need this. The most horrible part in anxiety is that as you told I can't physically see them or hear them and can't make eye contact. It makes me awkward and I ask them like, "Sorry, can you repeat this?" like after each statements. And the eye contact thing, ugh... so anxious.... But I do have confidence and excitement like to talk to them.... but the anxious ruin everything.
Thank you very much!
Finally after years, now I know what's wrong with me. I couldn't thank you enough for this.
A mindfulness component along with CBT would be a better alternative than just CBT because mindfulness practice can help detach oneself from unnecessary information like someone’s negative facial expression or negative talk from seeming like a big deal.
I was someone that had social anxiety so bad that I couldnt even look in the mirror, btw it was due to abuse from my parents telling me I was no one and that no one would love me, that stayed with me for awhile.
But now Im able to have conversations and people are starting to like me although I dont have any friends, Im better off than I was a year ago.
This makes a lot of sense. I work as a customer service person, and I definitely get anxiety in the situation of angry customers. It causes me a bright red face, shaking, and weak voice. It's not fun, but this video makes it make sense. Thank you Vanessa!
angry ppl just arent having a good day be positive and in control dont think about them. think of boundaries send me feedback if that helps
Thanks Vanessa I have like extreme social anxiety and it has caused me to live half a life underachieving in so many ways I cannot even begin to explain. Appreciate your video so much!
Take out the pressure of having to achieve anything in life and suddenly life seems so much less scary.
I was told by someone that I sounded incoherent and that I babbled. I have to admit, that messed with my head. Now I doubt everything I want to say, it's so frustrating. Not only do I feel anxious but I feel like the most underachieved in the bunch. ❤
This is one of the top videos I've seen from you. As someone who is affected by it I appreciate you are addressing this topic. I recently got attacked and was put down by a person because of my anxiety but as I learned from your previous videos I cut this toxic person out of my life.
Clicked this just to reinforce the fact that I do indeed have Social anxiety. Thanks universe, really nailing it home here!
I blush while at work. People have noticed it. Two woman saw me and gave me a nasty smirk, another one let me know I was red and said it so loud that even others turned around to check. People are actually judging me and I can see them staring at me now.
I have to stay in the same place at work for 12 hours whilst I pack merchandise. I can't stop turning red. I have to keep my eyes down cause if I notice anyone looking at me I blush. My head hurts, my hands sweat, my heart starts to beat so fast that I can even hear it over the loud music playing. I tear a little while at my station and I tell myself that it's all in my head but I can't seem to shut it off. At the end of the day I cry in the car before heading back home. I can't even enjoy my days off because I know I will have to go back to work and do it all over again, I get depressed so badly.
Awwwww I’m sorry. I hope you are doing great now. You got this buddy
Oh.. :( hows things going now? I hope its going well.
Thank you, Vanessa! I needed this. I believe I have localized social anxiety. I didn't know there were different types. I want to like this a million times. I need therapy. I will check out joyable.
My heart rate increases 5x in any social interaction
10x if i'm giving a speech
A little nervous? More like terribly nervous. You have a new subscriber! Thank you for sharing your story. I resonate so much with everything you were talking about. I look forward to seeing more of your videos!
I just decided that I don't care if everyone doesn't like me. Even a few times someone would tell me that a certain person didn't like me, and I'd be like "Whatever" - LOL it'a very liberating. We all want to be liked but life is too short to spend my time worrying that someone dislikes me. I've noticed, though, that given a little more time and a chance to get to know me, they can change their mind, so if it bothers you that much, just have a few conversations with the person, if opportunity presents itself, and take a genuine interest in thgem by asking questions....yuo'd be surprised how that can change a person's mind.
I love how you have managed to link science to everyday social anxiety experiences. This explanation is the best I have heard, and I can use these tips immediately. Thank you
Glad you've found it helpful!!
Vanessa is right on point! It’s a vicious cycle that sucks people down.
Thank you! Hope it was helpful for you. :)
Your teachings are inctedible
one of the best way to overcome it is actually act like u're a socially dynamic person, learn how to be it, instead of being self-conscious of ur own inability.
I'm a speech therapist in a high school. This info is priceless for my students!
You are a lifesaver! I can’t talk to people and keep on feeling guilty about making them feel anxious or bad with my “rudeness,” and I tend to read other people’s anxiety stories instead of getting help which doesn’t really help in the long run. So I really, REALLY need this and i’m extremely thankful to you because i feel progressive. It was like a blessing (lol) to see this video on my homepage ❤️
Vanessa Van Edwards Vanessa‼️‼️ This made my day (i just woke up but embarassingly cried last night. I cried tears of joy in the morning because of seeing this reply 🤣). Your content ALREADY helps me a lot and i know it will continue to. I’ve learnt so much from you and you are one of the people who made me passionate about psychology, specifically reading other people. I hope you are having a wonderful day! 🤗❤️
I love how in-depth you get in this video, going beyond the simple tactics. My fear used to get in the way of pursuing my goals for years.
What a great video, I've suffered with social anxiety for like 25 years now and probably gone about it the worst way possible learning to live with it and not seaking help which over the years has just made it worse and worse. I've found myself watching lots of videos like this trying to learn about the brain psychology and diet to try and understand what's going on inside my head. Watching this short video gave me loads of info and ideas to use 10/10 from me, like and subscribe a definate. Thank you!!
Wow someone actually gets it. Thank you for this!
I love this information!
I cut anxiety farts. My anxiety flatulence happens to be extremely foul. They are the type that gurgle real low and are very gassy and sound like a door creaking and they REEK like a combination of fresh diarrhea, hard boiled eggs and nachos. The aroma kinda creeps up. They feel like the type that should reek but you don’t smell anything until about 5 seconds or so, and then BAM. Gets right in your sinuses and begins to choke you. The aroma seems to permeate as it lingers until it’s like a bomb went off and everything within a certain radius is going to reek of the inside of my lower middle intestine....
Thank you so much, this is video is really helpful for me. I am finding solutions right now to manage my social anger at work. You are an inspiration for me
I'm so glad it was helpful. ❤️ I appreciate you!
This video is very on point. Thanks Vanessa
I needed this info...thanks!!
Wow. That totally just one hundred percent described me top to bottom. I am grateful for the opportunity to find a way through. Thanks Vanessa. You are awesome.
Thank you so much Vanessa! Really needed this. I've dealt with social anxiety the majority of my life, and it's proven to be a formidable foe. When I found your channel I had finally decided to challenge it, and once again, this video came at just the time I needed, and has helped to pick me up from a particularly low point. Please keep up the hard work! 🤗
Edit: Grammar 👀
The worst for me are (actually, the only ones)
- bring in the center of attention (especially on my birthday; for a couple of years I stopped celebrating it because I felt too stressed out and I still plan to keep this)
- eating or drinking in front of others, even on special ocasions (people don't understand this and keep forcing me wich makes things even worse)
- talking to my crush (but I try my best to keep it together)
You really help me work on it. Thank you really much!
I am an avid #MentalHealthAwareness advocate and performer, and I love this so much. I travel the country trying to bring that awareness on stages, in classrooms, hospitals, and on my TH-cam channel, so I get excited when I see other advocates. 💙❤
Wow! I learned so much from this. I have social anxiety and it is preventing me from getting a promotion. Thanks for sharing!
Peppermint tea is good against anxiety because it contains menthol that reduces anxiety.
Sage tea, salvia officinalis is also very powerful anxiolitic.
I thank God that I discovered these videos!Vanessa you are a revelation for me!
Avoid social situations at all costs. Solved.
Is that the answer. ?? 😆
DAAANG GIRL!
You're so inspiring. :) I want to demonstrate people I am intelligent, just like you demonstrate.
Micky Damon haha maybe I should reword that xD you're right.
Doesn't mean I have to be formal 24/7 thought, right? ;) I'm just trying to compliment her
I have characteristics of both localized and generalized social anxiety, cause i can talk to people I've know for awhile but if i am the center of attention or someone idk tries to talk to me i will freak out
This video is a revalation. They should show this in hi school to help people survive it !!! Could help so many people!! I had a lot of anxiety in hi school but couldnt rationalize it or understand it or how to deal with it. I hated school for the most part, because of anxiety. I felt alone and no one was there to help me because I didnt know how to communicate my feelings to anyone. This video exactly describes everything I went through.
Sad thing is when I feel that some people are judging me or feel that they see me in a negative way I'm always right so idk what to do about that
This video helped so much. Thank you.
So good, thanks so much Vanessa, these videos changed me inside out!
Like the tips, when the exact time approaches we can't think of anything.
I seriously have localized anxiety, Thank God that I came across this video cause I didn't know why am always like this, but now I understand and I want to overcome it, please help . Am Faridah
I'm 53 years old and I have been experiencing social anxiety since age 15. I have gone to therapy over the years and I have slowly progressed a little but I still find myself in anxious situations.
Wish I would have never went to a shrink about this 20 years ago. Funny thing was the therapist actually made a remark about, it's probably best not going to see a Psychiatrist over this. But I went anyway. Long story short, I was put on Benzodiazapines, Clonazapam.
Back then some Dr's thought it wasn't addictive, or not really addictive. Been on it for 20 years. Tried coming off about 4 times, but the withdrawal syndrome is beyond words, and doesn't get better in 2-3 weeks like alot of other drugs.
My Social Anxiety wasn't really that bad, just in certain situations. But just a heads up to other's out there. Stay away from these types of drugs, and if you do need them, they are only meant for short term use.
Because getting off them can be nearly impossible.. And it will effect you're brain, and everything about you over the long run.
Kman31ca So sorry. Best of luck to you! Have you tried yoga? ♥️
U have to quit those drugs.... and wait to ur body readjust .its more mental then phisical
Benzos are actually harder more of a withdraw than Percocet, good luck to you and God bless..I suffer from depression and anxiety of all kinds social whatever never know how to act.. It hope worse once I had my baby in October, I have not felt the same since..I left my job postpardum but never went back and have to totally avoid my job and nervous if I see the ppl I worked with cuz what will I say? I'm a mess 😭
Thanks so much for this.
Your explanations were very clear and helpful. I am going to take a look at some of your books.
thank you Vanessa for these helpful tips, I've been looking for solutions over the past 2 months and after watching this video, I'll try these tips
This is me! I want to take your course! All I do is watch you now.
🍃☀️🍃
People with social anxiety were raised in prefectionist cultures that are higly intolerant. There is epidemic of social anxiety in countries like Switzerland, Germany and Austria because they have very tight social norms.
Thank you Vee....u really save my life..from Tanzania
I have several social anxiety to the point where I try to avoid people all together I start thinking there not going to like me or there going to judge me and be mean I even think people are stareing at me and talking about me even when there not I try to not make eye contact my heart starts pounding I get sweaty and clam up.
Emily Siders same
Thank you for great content Vanessa!
Yeah im actually considered as sovial anxiety and i lovr it cause i know wveytime i encounter such tension i know that im growing hope this will be tattooed in my mind.
Such an informative clip!!! Excellent work as always Vanessa! Thanks a lot😇😇
Great video!
I think many of these tips are applicable to any type of anxiety, not just social.
Great video! You were knowledgeable and provided really good tips & examples.
Thank you!!!!
Vanessa ,I feel that you are phenomenal successful and motivated woman!
Thank you so much for your hard work Vanessa! I'm ready to read your book 'captivate' and take back control over my life after years of suffering from social anxiety 💪
From my perspective you have the most informative content on TH-cam. thank you
Taught full! Very nice and touching for those having such challenges. I learnt a lot from you Vanessa. Thank you!
Thank you. I just recently realized I have social anxiety issues and have been working on ways to overcome it.
Ready to be rid of awkwardness forever, ty
I'm so happy i found u. U are brilliant :)
Was with a group of friends and stumbled over my words when I spoke, and a guy in the group told me I needed to meditate :'(. I mean it's true but people DO notice your awkwardness, unlike what Vanessa said about people barely noticing or brushing it off.
My mind goes blank and that puts me into flight or fight mode which causes me to panic as I can't think, it's like the brain shuts down. This happened on a course I was on 2 months ago.
I'm on another course next week. This time I have the beta blockers ready and am now using high strength CBD oil.
I hope I can get through this as it will improve my confidence.
I've suffered with anxiety for 10 years and tried CBT , hypnotherapy, acupuncture , councling and meditation including medications.
It's so deeply rooted and as I don't sleep well the tiredness multiplies my anxiety.
I think I have a fear of being judged
Thank you my great teacher I'm so interested on what you are give us its so useful information and the way that you are introduce it is awesome thanks from my hared. Keep going god bless you .
I wanna be courageous like you in this video.
I beat my social phobia. But I still have some symptoms.
It takes time! You can do it!
Look I'm not understanding what the socially anxious or politically anxious people do that leads to stress and that stress in turn make someone depressed and depression leads to mental disbalance if not taken care of properly and helpful people are always there, however faraway they are, to stretch their hands out to get out of these and Venessa, thank you a lot for showing the way how to get out and keep oneself remain in themselves. But the million dollar question is how can you get out of these when the physician needs help from getting out of his own psychological sociopolitical anxieties and you are nowhere but to observe and follow what is inevitable for the kind of situation. Possibility is a factor we cannot reject but probability when least, you are nowhere but to surrender helplessly because you are not me and everyone's point of view when different you can hardly believe a cure is there because there's nobody here without a purpose of his own and nobody jumps out to stretch their hands before you are asked. We see, even feel that somebody is in dire situation but we better advice what to do but a real good slap is only a little medicine anybody powerful easily can do will never turn up to put down all these farce. Nevertheless I will try to make your advice spread although I have little repertory to do that.
Merry Christmas and take care.
Vanessa u r so confident hard to believe that u do have anxiety...
Appreciate ur explanation...cheers
I suffer from this. Thank you so much for this video.
I love your videos and the way you talk and explain things!
+Vanessa Van Edwards 😄💕
drinking to feel more comfortable HAHAHAHA you got me right there. i remembered that one event i have to perform a dance during my friend’s debut i drank alot to ease my thoughts and nervousness lol
I am an awkward turtle at parties... unless I hit the weed or have s few drinks.... I generally hate small talk.
I have recently had trouble... I have an attractive doctor and developed a small crush 😳 it's giving me the worst social anxiety....i kind of dread my next appointment and look forward to it at the same time....
When I was younger I used to get terrible anxiety getting on the school bus also when drinking in front of friends or going to the loo at my friends house wtf anxiety sucks.
Forget public speaking or going onstage during assembly.
I self medicated with weed for a long time . Am only just realizing what is wrong with me at 35 years old....
My heart goes out to anyone who gets it all the time.
Very intelligent lady
Alpha Allieu JAlloh yea she’s a researcher
I wanted to point out I don't fear being judged like, I'm not actively aware of what it is that I'm doing people particularly my Mother is judging me for but it does happen days later when she goes you know that thing you did? Sometimes I have thought about avoiding her and when I go into a social setting when she is present I have also thought before going in there I can't be myself but then I just think am I crazy? No I'm not doing that. So I actively get judged, by what I wear, will openly say she don't like my hair. How I should be more tactful. The fact that others can't take jokes but when others do its hilarious. Sometimes I wonder why I bother going. Telling me I can't say that, or something else, when I ask a question I will say the person's name I'm speaking to and I'm told it's making them uncomfortable etc and it's like a whole list of things I can't or shouldn't do, I can't remember all of that, so I don't. The more authenticity I show my family the more they can and will judge
just walking outside in the street brings me anxiety
Video in line with what SA is all about, so kudos for doing the research. I personally use worksheets and I found that combining CBT with REBT principles brings best results for me. I still struggle with authority at work, but I am working on it. Getting help is very expensive for me at the moment.
Except talking to strangers and being center of attention, I feel anxious.
Really stunning investigation..........!!!!!!!
I have this problem that I can't say someone's name. It's like every time I havd to say their name, I feel like " now we aren't there yet" I feel like someone name is reserved. And I know that it's all nonsense , but my subconscious brain is hard wired to it. I have never seen anyone else who had this problem. What could this be? I've googled it but I didn't find anything. Please help. It is really causing trouble.
I just quit my job because of social anxiety disorder. I had a crush on a girl at work but it was to painful to go every day and l couldn't talk to her. The thing about it she actually showed interest in me.
Thank you Vanessa .I think I have OCD as well .i have this neagtive obsessive thoughts all the time .I live in my head and I feel life is passing me by .help
Sending love ❤ Here are some articles you may find helpful: www.scienceofpeople.com/the-war-inside-our-brains/ www.scienceofpeople.com/mindfulness-activities/ www.scienceofpeople.com/meditation-benefits/ www.scienceofpeople.com/how-to-clear-your-mind/
Vanessa u r great..i just enjoy watching..n i realized that i need help..im from Nepal. Thank you
My social anxiety is more severe than you explained. But you did share a few helpful things. It makes me realize how much worse I've gotten. I have now developed agoraphobia and my body contorts uncontrollably. Along with uncontrollable facial expressions. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm just alone all the time.
I'm sorry to hear this! I'm glad there were at least a few helpful tips in the video. You may find there are some more helpful ones in this article: www.scienceofpeople.com/biggest-fears/
Chill i Dont get eye contact and people are mad we have to work on ourself and be better that's it we are humans and overcome anything when in pain and it's more in pain i loose eye contact that's normal don't worry u will do some yoga and be happy u will be fine in little time
Most helpful video I have ever seen, thanks
I blank out and sometimes a complete panic attack. At a wedding I panicked and ran right by the bride done the isle to get outside.....I have to drink to calm down....now I don’t go out...I am getting help....
I don't know if this will help anyone because I notice I am just not very grounded when I have an anxious reaction, but the worst thing to do is to hold the breath and lift/tense the shoulders.
Thank you so much mam. You were just to the points (at least in my cases)!