Feel free to check out the links in the description for: the LoveWho Discord server, personal social media links and the LoveWho website where you can sign up to be typed ~ Nathan
I cried at a few of these. How can ENFP's grow our self-esteem? I have spent many decades feeling broken. Now that I know my personality type I don't hate myself anymore but I still feel goofy and 'the dumb one' even though I'm a graduate and published author. I feel the 'real' me is too much for all the 'ST' types in this world. Anyhoo, thank you Nathan for doing all this. Blessings from Londinium.
@@yeahweburnstuff Your real you is the gift to this world. Nurture your strengths and detect your weakness so you can gradually improve for the sake of improving. Know that we all have something we need to work on when it comes to ourselves. Perhaps knowing that no one is perfect and we all have an area(or areas) in which we feel less self-confident could help you when it comes to interacting with people and just being who you are. Don’t measure your potential based on a scale set by others. It may work for some, but who says it is supposed to work for all? Make your own path through life. One step at a time. P.S. crying (in this case) could be a sign of relief. Relief that you got from feeling understood and appreciated rather than alienated by reading someone’s stereotypes on the internet. I hope this brings peace to your soul. 😇
Could you please do this for ESFP’s? I’ve been obsessed with the 16 personalities for years and in the last couple of months I found your channel which I absolutely adore!!! So thank you!!
One of my best pals is an ENFP, and the only extrovert in our friend group. I've learned a lot from her in how to think outside the box, and look at ideas and possibilities in a different way.
As an INTP, I'm mainly watching this video because my daughter is an ENFP. There's a lot of good stuff here that resonates with the struggles she has in her life.
As an ENFP I can pretty soundly resonate with this video. If she’s going through some struggles, maybe watching this could help her too? I know learning more about my type had helped me alot in life, especially with understanding the fact that other people can think alot differently sometimes. This channel has alot of great content, and so does Frank James. If she’s not into the personality thing yet then Frank James has alot of comedy type things that are good for beginners. Maybe she would resonate with some of it :)
I also think it’s wonderful that you are trying to understand her better. I’m an ENFP and my partner is an INTP. I am pretty sure that my dad is too. I think ENFPs and INTPs are very compatible in terms of open-mindedness. Once I understood the Ti/Fe axis as opposed to my own Fi/Te axis, most misunderstandings with the INTPs in my life cleared up easily.
I definitely think that INTPs and ENFPs are compatible types. My daughter is one of the sweetest, and most open-minded people that I know, and we have a very close relationship. She is familiar with Frank James' channel, as I follow several MBTI TH-camrs. She is the only extravert in our family, and thinks that the rest of us are silly for not being as excited to see other humans as she is.
This is really nice to hear! INTPs and ENFPs will have a surprising amount in common as well when it comes to navigating through life especially in the conventional workplace. It's great that you're taking the time to understand your daughter as well! ~ Nathan
I'm currently struggling with the last point you mentioned as its the "job/study phase" in my life & I'M HELLA CONFUSED ! It has been an year of constant denial & sadness & whatnot that turned into depression... Very recently with the help of intense introspection & friends/family suggestion I'm back to being my true ENFP self. I had lost touch of my weirdness & often questioned who I have become. Watching this video was like a self help summary of a book catered specially for me. I'm definitely gonna come back to this time n again.... for now I'd like to say- *Love who, I love you !*
100% relate! I was going through the same thing few months ago and I got depressed and frustrated because of how confuse I am and still haven't found where I should exactly be.
100% agree with #4! My education is Psychology undergrad and Music Theory/Composition M.A. I work in tech for a top tier company, primarily writing and orchestrating complex automations. It’s plenty lucrative and fun but also something I could hypothetically retire from if I had a magic influx of cash to “have my fun” for the rest of my life. It definitely supports my family and lifestyle wonderfully! Side note - Nathan has said before that ENFPs work well in the space between or at the intersection of fields and I totally agree. Neither of my degrees relate directly to what I do in tech but you can bet your ass I leverage both each any every day and that’s a big part of how I’ve lucky enough to end up where I am.
12 was my personal life-changing point Bc of how society is, you're expected to go to college right after high school, then get a job after graduating, so I expected that much in my life, but then stuff happened and I couldn't go to college or get a job. At first it was frustrating, seeing ppl I know experience things I thought I'd experience as well made me feel like I was behind in life, but later on I understood that there's no such thing as being "behind" in life, everyone goes at their own pace. I also discovered so many things abt myself in that period, abt ppl around me too, and changed my view in life entirely So basicallyyy you don't have to live the "default" life of school-college-job-marriage You can totally do it in different order or not do it at all Also take your time in life, live day by day and enjoy the little things around you, stressing yourself out abt things won't suddenly make them happen faster
Mmm! THIS!! I'm a 37 year old ENFP, and only learned this lesson over the course of the first 9 years of my marriage (currently on 11 years and counting)... we have never had a positive pregnancy test, but have wanted kids since before we knew each other. Seeing my younger sibling and then my much younger cousins all have children before me was heart-rending. Additionally, my husband and I don't own a home, even though some of my cousins and even my husband's siblings all do. Additionally, people in our friend group own their homes, but we still rent. So, I was constantly comparing myself to everyone around me and thinking I somehow was messing up my life and it brought a lot of heartache. However, within the last two years, I also learned what you learned at what sounds like a younger age than me... life isn't a linear path with everyone achieving milestones in the same approximate timing or order. Life is sometimes out of order and it goes at its own pace. In the meantime, I'm going to soak up the sun, get excited about fields full of fireflies at night simply because they remind me of a thousand tiny twinkle lights, stand at the ocean's edge (in the rare moments I am near enough to the ocean) and simply breathe... like soul deep breathing, dance in the summer rain, pick wildflowers just because they are pretty, smile at the sound of the horses next door when they are being sassy with their humans, whistle back to the birds that sing in our yard, rescue baby squirrels that fall out of their nests, burst into random song because the juke box in my head is always on, and go sledding with my nieces and nephews simply because it is so much fun to hear their giggles and remember the exhilaration of that experience when I was a child.
ENFPs are visual learners. I appreciate the information you provided, but reading subtitles would have been a great way to keep my attention and help me process the information faster. Keep up the great work 😁
I wholeheartedly agree with implementing number 7. It has helped me better manage my time and leave my my mind free to focus on more important things than the necessary dull routines.
I think #2 often applies to this ENFJ as well. But I tend to keep my social circle WAY smaller now that I'm older. If people don't like something about me, or think I'm strange... oh, well. 😂 They're probably right. So #8 and #9 absolutely apply as well.
"2. For ENFPs being normal is weird." YEEEES, as an ENFP I can say that for us the basic things are weird. That's why you won't see an ENFP dressed and acting basic and normal😂👍
It is quite easy to find cynical/pessimistic enfp, as they have so many possiblities/options to choose from...yet they cannot decide and often stay with nothing...even their great sense of humor doasnt help.
This video is so accurate, informative and helpful, it's actually insane! As an ENFP, I've either worked in these, am beginning to work on these or havent realised, but will work on these points. Thank you for making the points so concise and clear. I'll come back to this video and encourage fellow enfp friends of mine to do the same ❤
Hey Nathan. I really do think that ENFPs might be one of your favorites! Appreciate the understanding always. Not everyone gets us you know... Also, 4 & 5 FTW! 12 as well! :-)
You will not believe this but I bet on something quite big by telling myself "if love who uploads then its gonna happen" And YOU UPLOADED It sounds quite silly but thanks for uploading tonight
Thanks, this sounds actually really helpful and comforting. I have watched ENFP advice videos that went like "As an ENFP, it really helped me to get my shit together and thus I succeeded at life." (badly simplified obviously but still, it could be frustrating) . I think I'm going to make breakfast now (have been lying in bed in my darkened room avoiding my flatmates bc of this social yoyo effect lol)
Much love for your channel! It's crazy how being an extremely logical/ dreamer is even possible. Seem like an oxymoron. Alot of our dreams are not dreams but logical solutions to problems that are too big for the people around us to chew... lol which in turn make them too hard for us to implicate. Which frustrates us to a point dejection and makes us feel the need to retract to introversion and that leads to complete darkness. Then we reflect .. Feel enlightened by the lessons learned. Only to repeat the same pattern on a different idea. Having a high iq and an ever developing high eq. Makes learning and understanding easier. But it makes your ideas seem more and more far fetched and unrealistic to the majority. So like you said it's more about a subtler approach.
#9 and 11 are so accurate to whatever type I am. After studying psychology and the MBTI cognitive functions religiously for over 2 and a half years, I still can't even type myself accurately 😅 I've narrowed it down to XNTX or ENFP and idk man this video really makes me wonder if ENFP does fit me the best after all.
Honestly, a lot of these applies to INFPs too. Or maybe I'm just a very introverted ENFP? I find a lot of these applies to myself. Such as self-preservation from people who drain you, and managing enthusiasm. Man, I can't remember all the times that I thought I could handle something with great passion only to later be completely crushed and joyless while struggling to finish on time...
Really great ideas. I appreciate that you didn’t put us into the “shallow hippie” stereotype of ENFPs, which couldn’t be further from the truth. I especially appreciate the advice to not keep everyone, to find efficient ways of dealing with the boring life stuff that drives me nuts, and to not try to live linearly. When I live out these concepts, I thrive. But when I get caught up in being conventional in these areas, I drown or wither. Which is a perfect example of how we should not try to be normal. (Just make sure we have structure and good income. lol) On second thought, I think I loved all the points!
Glad you enjoyed the video! Also, feel free to check out the discord server if you haven’t already. Always good to have more ENFPs on there. The link for it is in the description below ~ Nathan
I just want to say a huge thank you for the content in this video. It addresses a lot of the shortcomings I knew and some I didn't. I also love the suggestions you say at the end of each point to be able to see a way forward. As a young person in the age of trying to find their place in time and space, this has hugely helped. thank you again
Nathan, Thank you so much for these advices, they are so accurate ! : not being logical enough is one of my biggest insecurities. Moreover, I periodically try to fit into the box and to have a linear life until it becomes too painful, or until I don't have any energy and optimism left. Also, I recently came to the conclusion that I must resist the temptation to sacrificing my own material/financial comfort. Before, I thought getting a low salary wouldn't be a problem, as I don't buy any clothes and so on, but then, I realised economical dependency is maintaining me in a vicious circle. Actually, I have been struggling a lot with my ENFP life, lately, so it's truly relieving and useful to hear those advices from you ! 🙂
I feel miserable sometimes. I’m an ENFP that’s fake. I have serious people pleasing problems. I afraid of being my enthusiastic self in front of people because I’m afraid of them and their remarks. I’m very jumpy and imaginative, and I love people, but I’m just afraid of being myself. I don’t know what to say or what to do. And I’m afraid of being weird, even though I yearn to be. I never been able to successfully “go against the flow.” And the few people I’ve met and opened to are toxic. 😑😑 Or maybe this is just a identity crisis, since I’m a teenager. 😱😭😭😭Anyone else relates?
This is why I started to study non-dualism Advaita Vedanta spirituality (Eckhart Tolle, Rupert Spira, Ramana Maharishi, etc) and read the entire A Course in Miracles (audiobook cause it's like 1300 pages), because I was literally exhausted by my own ego by age 30. I just got tired of suffering and living, as elder ENFP Jim Carrey put it as a sort of character of myself. Dominant intuitives like INJ's and ENP's can go on to make great spiritual guides but first you must KNOW THYSELF, and this is where spiritual awakening comes in. Embrace your identity crisis, you WANT to have your "dark night of the soul" in your 20's, preferably not as a midlife crisis when you're 50 (but even then better late than never). Good luck, just don't kill yourself when you start to break free cause you'll probably lose some friends/family when people see you're not willing to play a cartoon character for them anymore (but that's a good thing to rid of such people anyway for your own health). Learn to be alone without feeling "lonely", that's another great way to find yourself.
No this is literally everything written about me in my brain lmao but I’m 24 still filled with that same angst because I lock my true self up and blame others for the reason I don’t express it. Though I’m the one to blame for not doing so lmao
this is soooo me. It’s what I went through in my childhood and it stopped now when I’m almost 24 so it’s been pretty long. I hate hypocrites and liars but I oftend lied myself because I was too afraid that I will disappoint people and wanted to cover it up… only made it worse. I didn’t have healthy boundaries and said yes to so many people that I was never able to keep all of my promised, just because I was too eager to help and unable to say no even when I should have. I often faked what I express (emotionally) and drained myself to a point where I could not keep up the multitude of fake masks I put on and made people detest me as a fake. All of it hurt me a lot…. I think the root if the problem is a lack of self-worth 😅 first you should estabilish a relationship with yourself, treat yourself not as you but as a different person, as if you were your own friend if it makes sense? Also keep only a tight circle of people in your everyday life and have time schedules for the rest THAT helps a lot. If you spend all your energy on others you won’t have any left for your own upkeep and maintenance. Then you will break and let both yourself and others down. Also I know you might struggle with this one in particular because of inferior Si but do try to always write down at least 3 sentences every evening about how you felt during the day. It helps prevent your brain from being trapped in an overthinking loop because you feel the information is secured on paper and you don’t have to go back to it in your mind. Even those 3 damn sentences bring such a relief and clear up so much space in your head, it’s crazy 😂 I wish you luck in life 😊
3:51 Dang that's actually how it feels I often get too excited about a project or something and volunteer/decide to take a lot of responsibilities, but then I get overwhelmed by the amount of things that I need to do, knowing that it's hard for me to stay focused on a task if I'm not fully into it. Guess I'll take the advice, thanks hehe
Perfect quality info mi amigo. I’ve been typed by other friends as the ENTJ. Then I incorrectly typed myself as INFP, then reading a Heidi Priebe book on ENFP’s… realized to my surprise she was describing me, much as you have just now. Nice to feel understood, and to see myself laid out on paper so to speak. Keep up the great work love who.. The compound interest of your videos and the culmination of your hard work is going to pay off..
“Manage your energy and excitement” I have a tremendous list of hobbies, the sheer number of things I’m in to doing are so that when I bore of one, I find another and cycle back when the sentiment repeats. The way to easily transition from one hobby to the next in my case is to start off small, if the little project is enough to scratch that itch, I go to the next hobby, but if I’m still in the mood for more, I go one step bigger until it’s enough, then I switch I have stopped projects for going too big and too bold too fast, I’ll get back to them for sure, but it certainly won’t be today, and perhaps not even tomorrow, but that is okay with me 👌🏼 ~ Enfp
Same here :/ Did you find a way to keep all of them under control whilst also making sure they're developing? I fear so many great ideas and progression is being lost due to my incostistant and lack of determination...
@@lepos4136 keeping a visible check list always helps, simple is better, mine is just a sticky note on the wall with the *main* projects I have in mind, example _Projects: Sewing Crochet Resin_ And I mark them off once I am satisfied, or I’ll jump between them until they’re all done And if you have the space where you work, keeping a little bit of the materials out as a reminder helps ease jumping back into it when you’re in the mood, in my case at least
@@marcellava I've now written my 7 or so half-complete/incomplete projects into my trusty journal, thanks! It sorta helps, (especially with the big picture thing lol) Is it me or do you also jump from projects to projects until you're like 'nah, I'll do it next month or next year'
@@lepos4136 Glad I could offer some tips, and oh yea, most definitely I have 3 paintings I’ve started/prepped for 1-2 yrs ago, they were each fairly large tho and I got overwhelmed after starting them, they’re all currently paused Since then I’ve crocheted abt 10 stuffed animals none bigger than 5ins tall, paint/decorate 7 mini boxes from the dollar store, and sewn 1 small makeup bag for my mom, but those paintings go untouched so far They’re all in view near my crafts area, and a daily reminder I need to get to it at some point, but that’s okay with me, I *know* I’ll work on them at some point, but also achieving many smaller projects makes me feel accomplished too
I appreciate #5 so much. Some time ago I saw a video talking about the shadow of each type. Ti was considered the weak point of the enfp and the person who created the video said that enfps have no logos and are blind to it. Which I don't experience as true at all. Yes, I am more intuitive and I will take a leap of faith over a logical choice. But I understand logos much better than most people and easily got straight a's in logic based courses in high school and uni (law, philosophy, chemistry, accounting, for example).
I agree to the things you've mentioned about us ENFPs (well to me to be exact). You are right that we constantly try to evaluate our beliefs (and my thoughts and behaviors) that makes me realize to change or be more observant how it affects to people. Like when I'm talking about a topic I'm really passionate about, tendency is I get loud, fast and eager to let the other person know the other angle or such possibility, but because along the way I've noticed not all people can't accommodate the upbeat I'm into, the next time around, I tend to examine his/her frequency first to match with so i can deliver it according to (what i think his/her pace is). Being a ENFP can be hard hahahah but fulfilling when they get amazed with our way of thinking! 😂
Really fantastic as always. You always take care to really give nuanced, insightful, specific information, not just clickbaity generalities and the same tired tropes. As a 35-year-old ENFP I not only agreed with everything you said but also found that many of your points were big life lessons that I had come to over years of experience, lessons that I knew applied to my personality type very specifically, and which I value highly. As per your last point, it took a lot of trial and error sometimes to figure these things out, and maybe I would have always needed that, even if I had seen your video beforehand. However, I'm sure this video will plant the seed of understanding in many minds, even if they still need to go and make those mistakes anyway. It puts a clear "name" to those behaviours in a way that helps you identify them more easily.
One of the reasons I wanted to do this particular series for all of the types is so I could go into little bit more detail than usual. It's great to hear that you're enjoying it! ~ Nathan
Thank you so much. This is rather accurate and its inspiring me to use my energy to try and complete some of the many creative projects I've got half started. Also, yes, went to a gig on Saturday, totally excited to see everyone, burnt all my energy out and was feeling knackered by the end and the last two days I've enjoyed being at home. I love people, I particularly love chatting online too (I can be in several twitch streams at once or have multiple conversations open) but my, do I try to be a friend to everyone :) Its good, but I do have to work on the "you can't pour from an empty cup" aspect!
I agree, I agre, I agree !!!! I agree with all of that! Which is quite rare i would say... A lot of people just talk nonsense about enfp's and that's hurt me personally. I hate being unundertand, that stressed me a lot. But in your videos ... yeah I finally reconized myself. I feel understand so thank you ! yeah!
It is actually scary how accurate and helpful this advice is. It feels like you have looked into my brain and whole life story in order to make this video(ENFP)
6 is good, I found out about that and it helps. AND also wait with people bc the first enthusiasm and idealising will change in most cases, just try to count that in to not have people get closer than you later want them. Same idea but for people and note: if you are suoerwarm just by habit, some people expect you are now best friends. Think before to know who you really want to think that and with who to better dial down abit
Oh, I love 2) Yes I do. I have come to the conclusion- it better be this time, anyway- that I , being a lateral thinker, am ENFP on one side and ISFJ on the other, with a weird mix of whatever they can both form best when stressed which is when I go to mid-ground. Though, I don't know how they put together ISTP and ENTP. But, whatever. It's an explanation that works for me. And, most importantly to how I started this comment, I spent a great deal of time with people asking me "Do you have to be so weird?" and "Can't you just be normal?" in my younger days. The latter of which I just started answering with "If this isn't normal, then, no!"
Managing my energy (and excitement) is the toughest one for me. Having manic depressive disorder doesn't help, but as I get older I've gotten a lot better about it.
I’m 50/50 ENFP and INFP. I’ve been called weird and magical my whole life. I became a high-school Theatre Arts teacher. I wrote my own stage-play adaptation of Alice in Wonderland…stuff like that. Nothing I do is linear. That can make the boring side of life - balancing checkbooks, doing your taxes, etc - very difficult.
This video rockfor s! Helpful advice and info about ENFP . After some time , I have realized (with the help of your videos !) that I am an ambivert . I knew I was an extrovert but not a stereotypical one- I enjoy and need more downtime then most .❤🌈💜🐾🐾
Ohhhhh I love the the way you are nonchalantly sitting side saddle on your chair at the tea party. Are you drinking a cuppa mouse though??!!! A cup of tea, some fancy headwear and a nice slice of fantasy often helps ENFPs deal with many of the points in your video. Particularly number 2.
Mr. Nathan i just went to your website to check out if I could be typed since I just cant get it right I feel :/ and i made a mindblowing discovery! Good Sir you are an introvert?!? And all this time I thought you where an extrovert that created an online stage character who is fun and witty with an diffidently (don't know if I found the right translation there) distinguished twist. Now I guess you are just epic like that :) Please keep up the great work :D
Not going to give up my creativity for anything. And enfp are not only artist. The amount of concentration and hours of learning when we are into the topic can be owerwhelming for others.
I didn't know about the myer-briggs type when I was tested. Understand Myer Briggs typing I would have answered the correctly to turn out as an ENFP type. DAM
My friend is the same and I'm currently in the process to finding if I also have it. I think enfps function very similarly to those with adhd. Buy to an enfp with adhd is interesting.
No matter which test I take, I'm an ENFP, or INFP. When I was younger, more toward the E. As an older person, more I. But still, It's 40/60 ish. Sometimes I wonder about it.
we enfp have te, considered with using logic but doesnt settle down to a frame work and.advocating that frame work, thats why people may see us ilogical because our logic constantly change as we grab more ideas with ne
Feel free to check out the links in the description for: the LoveWho Discord server, personal social media links and the LoveWho website where you can sign up to be typed ~ Nathan
I cried at a few of these. How can ENFP's grow our self-esteem? I have spent many decades feeling broken. Now that I know my personality type I don't hate myself anymore but I still feel goofy and 'the dumb one' even though I'm a graduate and published author. I feel the 'real' me is too much for all the 'ST' types in this world. Anyhoo, thank you Nathan for doing all this. Blessings from Londinium.
@@yeahweburnstuff Your real you is the gift to this world. Nurture your strengths and detect your weakness so you can gradually improve for the sake of improving. Know that we all have something we need to work on when it comes to ourselves. Perhaps knowing that no one is perfect and we all have an area(or areas) in which we feel less self-confident could help you when it comes to interacting with people and just being who you are. Don’t measure your potential based on a scale set by others. It may work for some, but who says it is supposed to work for all? Make your own path through life. One step at a time.
P.S. crying (in this case) could be a sign of relief. Relief that you got from feeling understood and appreciated rather than alienated by reading someone’s stereotypes on the internet. I hope this brings peace to your soul. 😇
Could you please do this for ESFP’s? I’ve been obsessed with the 16 personalities for years and in the last couple of months I found your channel which I absolutely adore!!! So thank you!!
#6 describes my 20s 🤣
Learning from mistakes for my 30s
Could you please do the esfp? 🥺
One of my best pals is an ENFP, and the only extrovert in our friend group. I've learned a lot from her in how to think outside the box, and look at ideas and possibilities in a different way.
Hi and what's your mbti?
I know you're hufflepuff because I saw you in HP related comment section.
I'm an enfp+ravenclaw.
@@lilinectar29 Greetings, it's wonderful to meet a fellow Harry Potter/MBTI fan. I'm an INFJ+Hufflepuff.
Mmm, delicious combo!!
I know that infjs enjoy my chaos but sometimes I'm afraid I may annoy them.
Love and hugs❤️🤗
As an INTP, I'm mainly watching this video because my daughter is an ENFP. There's a lot of good stuff here that resonates with the struggles she has in her life.
As an ENFP I can pretty soundly resonate with this video. If she’s going through some struggles, maybe watching this could help her too? I know learning more about my type had helped me alot in life, especially with understanding the fact that other people can think alot differently sometimes. This channel has alot of great content, and so does Frank James. If she’s not into the personality thing yet then Frank James has alot of comedy type things that are good for beginners. Maybe she would resonate with some of it :)
I think that it is great that you put that much effort into understanding your own daughter. I wish you all the best.
I also think it’s wonderful that you are trying to understand her better. I’m an ENFP and my partner is an INTP. I am pretty sure that my dad is too. I think ENFPs and INTPs are very compatible in terms of open-mindedness. Once I understood the Ti/Fe axis as opposed to my own Fi/Te axis, most misunderstandings with the INTPs in my life cleared up easily.
I definitely think that INTPs and ENFPs are compatible types. My daughter is one of the sweetest, and most open-minded people that I know, and we have a very close relationship.
She is familiar with Frank James' channel, as I follow several MBTI TH-camrs. She is the only extravert in our family, and thinks that the rest of us are silly for not being as excited to see other humans as she is.
This is really nice to hear! INTPs and ENFPs will have a surprising amount in common as well when it comes to navigating through life especially in the conventional workplace. It's great that you're taking the time to understand your daughter as well! ~ Nathan
I'm currently struggling with the last point you mentioned as its the "job/study phase" in my life & I'M HELLA CONFUSED ! It has been an year of constant denial & sadness & whatnot that turned into depression... Very recently with the help of intense introspection & friends/family suggestion I'm back to being my true ENFP self. I had lost touch of my weirdness & often questioned who I have become. Watching this video was like a self help summary of a book catered specially for me. I'm definitely gonna come back to this time n again.... for now I'd like to say- *Love who, I love you !*
One should always find ways back to their weirdness, glad to know you're doing just that! ~ Nathan
100% relate! I was going through the same thing few months ago and I got depressed and frustrated because of how confuse I am and still haven't found where I should exactly be.
100% agree with #4! My education is Psychology undergrad and Music Theory/Composition M.A. I work in tech for a top tier company, primarily writing and orchestrating complex automations. It’s plenty lucrative and fun but also something I could hypothetically retire from if I had a magic influx of cash to “have my fun” for the rest of my life. It definitely supports my family and lifestyle wonderfully!
Side note - Nathan has said before that ENFPs work well in the space between or at the intersection of fields and I totally agree. Neither of my degrees relate directly to what I do in tech but you can bet your ass I leverage both each any every day and that’s a big part of how I’ve lucky enough to end up where I am.
Love this comment! It's always nice to have feedback from real life examples of the types ~ Nathan
Congratulations! I’ve a degree in Psychology and Theology. But am a writer at heart.
Haha I'm glad to see a fellow tech and music ENFP. Went to undergrad for Vocal Performance, work in IT 😂
12 was my personal life-changing point
Bc of how society is, you're expected to go to college right after high school, then get a job after graduating, so I expected that much in my life, but then stuff happened and I couldn't go to college or get a job.
At first it was frustrating, seeing ppl I know experience things I thought I'd experience as well made me feel like I was behind in life, but later on I understood that there's no such thing as being "behind" in life, everyone goes at their own pace.
I also discovered so many things abt myself in that period, abt ppl around me too, and changed my view in life entirely
So basicallyyy you don't have to live the "default" life of school-college-job-marriage
You can totally do it in different order or not do it at all
Also take your time in life, live day by day and enjoy the little things around you, stressing yourself out abt things won't suddenly make them happen faster
Mmm! THIS!!
I'm a 37 year old ENFP, and only learned this lesson over the course of the first 9 years of my marriage (currently on 11 years and counting)... we have never had a positive pregnancy test, but have wanted kids since before we knew each other. Seeing my younger sibling and then my much younger cousins all have children before me was heart-rending.
Additionally, my husband and I don't own a home, even though some of my cousins and even my husband's siblings all do. Additionally, people in our friend group own their homes, but we still rent.
So, I was constantly comparing myself to everyone around me and thinking I somehow was messing up my life and it brought a lot of heartache.
However, within the last two years, I also learned what you learned at what sounds like a younger age than me... life isn't a linear path with everyone achieving milestones in the same approximate timing or order. Life is sometimes out of order and it goes at its own pace.
In the meantime, I'm going to soak up the sun, get excited about fields full of fireflies at night simply because they remind me of a thousand tiny twinkle lights, stand at the ocean's edge (in the rare moments I am near enough to the ocean) and simply breathe... like soul deep breathing, dance in the summer rain, pick wildflowers just because they are pretty, smile at the sound of the horses next door when they are being sassy with their humans, whistle back to the birds that sing in our yard, rescue baby squirrels that fall out of their nests, burst into random song because the juke box in my head is always on, and go sledding with my nieces and nephews simply because it is so much fun to hear their giggles and remember the exhilaration of that experience when I was a child.
As an ENFP mama many of these rules I do actually live by without even knowing it. Thank you for framing them so eloquently.
Hope you enjoyed the video! ~ Nathan
"Accept everyone, but dont keep everyone" is so accurate
Rule #3 is GENIUS. Thank you for this advice, from an entp.
It's a concept that I read in a book recently. The moment I came across it I felt like it was applicable to ENFPs! ~ Nathan
We don't really care what people think but care some about how they feel.
ENFPs are visual learners. I appreciate the information you provided, but reading subtitles would have been a great way to keep my attention and help me process the information faster.
Keep up the great work 😁
I wholeheartedly agree with implementing number 7. It has helped me better manage my time and leave my my mind free to focus on more important things than the necessary dull routines.
I think #2 often applies to this ENFJ as well. But I tend to keep my social circle WAY smaller now that I'm older. If people don't like something about me, or think I'm strange... oh, well. 😂 They're probably right. So #8 and #9 absolutely apply as well.
Oh, he started off from the hardest pill to swallow. Or, maybe it's that I have to work on that now..
"2. For ENFPs being normal is weird." YEEEES, as an ENFP I can say that for us the basic things are weird. That's why you won't see an ENFP dressed and acting basic and normal😂👍
It is quite easy to find cynical/pessimistic enfp, as they have so many possiblities/options to choose from...yet they cannot decide and often stay with nothing...even their great sense of humor doasnt help.
This video is so accurate, informative and helpful, it's actually insane!
As an ENFP, I've either worked in these, am beginning to work on these or havent realised, but will work on these points.
Thank you for making the points so concise and clear.
I'll come back to this video and encourage fellow enfp friends of mine to do the same ❤
I agree, this video is like a self help summary of a book catered specially for us ENFPs.... Lots of love & weirdness from a fellow weird ! :)
Thank you for this comment and I appreciate you sharing it with other people as well ~ Nathan
I have never heard more helpful or catered advice in my life... love this series and your consistently original content
Hey Nathan. I really do think that ENFPs might be one of your favorites! Appreciate the understanding always. Not everyone gets us you know... Also, 4 & 5 FTW! 12 as well! :-)
You will not believe this but I bet on something quite big by telling myself "if love who uploads then its gonna happen"
And YOU UPLOADED
It sounds quite silly but thanks for uploading tonight
What was the big thing?
Thanks, this sounds actually really helpful and comforting. I have watched ENFP advice videos that went like "As an ENFP, it really helped me to get my shit together and thus I succeeded at life." (badly simplified obviously but still, it could be frustrating) . I think I'm going to make breakfast now (have been lying in bed in my darkened room avoiding my flatmates bc of this social yoyo effect lol)
Much love for your channel! It's crazy how being an extremely logical/ dreamer is even possible. Seem like an oxymoron. Alot of our dreams are not dreams but logical solutions to problems that are too big for the people around us to chew... lol which in turn make them too hard for us to implicate. Which frustrates us to a point dejection and makes us feel the need to retract to introversion and that leads to complete darkness. Then we reflect .. Feel enlightened by the lessons learned. Only to repeat the same pattern on a different idea. Having a high iq and an ever developing high eq. Makes learning and understanding easier. But it makes your ideas seem more and more far fetched and unrealistic to the majority. So like you said it's more about a subtler approach.
#9 and 11 are so accurate to whatever type I am. After studying psychology and the MBTI cognitive functions religiously for over 2 and a half years, I still can't even type myself accurately 😅 I've narrowed it down to XNTX or ENFP and idk man this video really makes me wonder if ENFP does fit me the best after all.
Come to the Discord :) (in the description)
@@punkbunnee9558 I suppose it may be time for that
Honestly, a lot of these applies to INFPs too. Or maybe I'm just a very introverted ENFP? I find a lot of these applies to myself. Such as self-preservation from people who drain you, and managing enthusiasm. Man, I can't remember all the times that I thought I could handle something with great passion only to later be completely crushed and joyless while struggling to finish on time...
INFPs have the same cognitive functions in the opposite order
Really great ideas. I appreciate that you didn’t put us into the “shallow hippie” stereotype of ENFPs, which couldn’t be further from the truth. I especially appreciate the advice to not keep everyone, to find efficient ways of dealing with the boring life stuff that drives me nuts, and to not try to live linearly. When I live out these concepts, I thrive. But when I get caught up in being conventional in these areas, I drown or wither. Which is a perfect example of how we should not try to be normal. (Just make sure we have structure and good income. lol) On second thought, I think I loved all the points!
This was a simplified insight into my mind and life. Excellent work!
And thank you for providing this wisdom to create confidence in people's life decisions.
This is the best advice I have ever heard for my type. Thank you for this valuable ENFP information 🙏🏼💖
Glad you enjoyed the video! Also, feel free to check out the discord server if you haven’t already. Always good to have more ENFPs on there. The link for it is in the description below ~ Nathan
I just want to say a huge thank you for the content in this video. It addresses a lot of the shortcomings I knew and some I didn't. I also love the suggestions you say at the end of each point to be able to see a way forward. As a young person in the age of trying to find their place in time and space, this has hugely helped. thank you again
Nathan,
Thank you so much for these advices, they are so accurate ! : not being logical enough is one of my biggest insecurities. Moreover, I periodically try to fit into the box and to have a linear life until it becomes too painful, or until I don't have any energy and optimism left. Also, I recently came to the conclusion that I must resist the temptation to sacrificing my own material/financial comfort. Before, I thought getting a low salary wouldn't be a problem, as I don't buy any clothes and so on, but then, I realised economical dependency is maintaining me in a vicious circle. Actually, I have been struggling a lot with my ENFP life, lately, so it's truly relieving and useful to hear those advices from you ! 🙂
I feel miserable sometimes. I’m an ENFP that’s fake. I have serious people pleasing problems. I afraid of being my enthusiastic self in front of people because I’m afraid of them and their remarks. I’m very jumpy and imaginative, and I love people, but I’m just afraid of being myself. I don’t know what to say or what to do. And I’m afraid of being weird, even though I yearn to be. I never been able to successfully “go against the flow.” And the few people I’ve met and opened to are toxic. 😑😑 Or maybe this is just a identity crisis, since I’m a teenager. 😱😭😭😭Anyone else relates?
This is why I started to study non-dualism Advaita Vedanta spirituality (Eckhart Tolle, Rupert Spira, Ramana Maharishi, etc) and read the entire A Course in Miracles (audiobook cause it's like 1300 pages), because I was literally exhausted by my own ego by age 30. I just got tired of suffering and living, as elder ENFP Jim Carrey put it as a sort of character of myself. Dominant intuitives like INJ's and ENP's can go on to make great spiritual guides but first you must KNOW THYSELF, and this is where spiritual awakening comes in. Embrace your identity crisis, you WANT to have your "dark night of the soul" in your 20's, preferably not as a midlife crisis when you're 50 (but even then better late than never). Good luck, just don't kill yourself when you start to break free cause you'll probably lose some friends/family when people see you're not willing to play a cartoon character for them anymore (but that's a good thing to rid of such people anyway for your own health). Learn to be alone without feeling "lonely", that's another great way to find yourself.
@@nobodynowhere21 Thank you so much for your support! I'll keep what you said in mind!
No this is literally everything written about me in my brain lmao but I’m 24 still filled with that same angst because I lock my true self up and blame others for the reason I don’t express it. Though I’m the one to blame for not doing so lmao
Exactly! I feel the same way
this is soooo me. It’s what I went through in my childhood and it stopped now when I’m almost 24 so it’s been pretty long. I hate hypocrites and liars but I oftend lied myself because I was too afraid that I will disappoint people and wanted to cover it up… only made it worse. I didn’t have healthy boundaries and said yes to so many people that I was never able to keep all of my promised, just because I was too eager to help and unable to say no even when I should have. I often faked what I express (emotionally) and drained myself to a point where I could not keep up the multitude of fake masks I put on and made people detest me as a fake. All of it hurt me a lot…. I think the root if the problem is a lack of self-worth 😅 first you should estabilish a relationship with yourself, treat yourself not as you but as a different person, as if you were your own friend if it makes sense? Also keep only a tight circle of people in your everyday life and have time schedules for the rest THAT helps a lot. If you spend all your energy on others you won’t have any left for your own upkeep and maintenance. Then you will break and let both yourself and others down. Also I know you might struggle with this one in particular because of inferior Si but do try to always write down at least 3 sentences every evening about how you felt during the day. It helps prevent your brain from being trapped in an overthinking loop because you feel the information is secured on paper and you don’t have to go back to it in your mind. Even those 3 damn sentences bring such a relief and clear up so much space in your head, it’s crazy 😂
I wish you luck in life 😊
You know us very, very well and this makes me happy.
Thank you!
damn thats the most accurate list i've seen for ENFPs...
you're amazing with words
3:51 Dang that's actually how it feels
I often get too excited about a project or something and volunteer/decide to take a lot of responsibilities, but then I get overwhelmed by the amount of things that I need to do, knowing that it's hard for me to stay focused on a task if I'm not fully into it.
Guess I'll take the advice, thanks hehe
Perfect quality info mi amigo. I’ve been typed by other friends as the ENTJ. Then I incorrectly typed myself as INFP, then reading a Heidi Priebe book on ENFP’s… realized to my surprise she was describing me, much as you have just now. Nice to feel understood, and to see myself laid out on paper so to speak.
Keep up the great work love who.. The compound interest of your videos and the culmination of your hard work is going to pay off..
9) I’m definitely a magnet for a variety of people. Just recently I had to unload one of these overly intrusive people. Ugh… it was rough. 😂😂😬
“Manage your energy and excitement”
I have a tremendous list of hobbies, the sheer number of things I’m in to doing are so that when I bore of one, I find another and cycle back when the sentiment repeats. The way to easily transition from one hobby to the next in my case is to start off small, if the little project is enough to scratch that itch, I go to the next hobby, but if I’m still in the mood for more, I go one step bigger until it’s enough, then I switch
I have stopped projects for going too big and too bold too fast, I’ll get back to them for sure, but it certainly won’t be today, and perhaps not even tomorrow, but that is okay with me 👌🏼 ~ Enfp
Same here :/ Did you find a way to keep all of them under control whilst also making sure they're developing? I fear so many great ideas and progression is being lost due to my incostistant and lack of determination...
@@lepos4136 keeping a visible check list always helps, simple is better, mine is just a sticky note on the wall with the *main* projects I have in mind, example
_Projects:
Sewing
Crochet
Resin_
And I mark them off once I am satisfied, or I’ll jump between them until they’re all done
And if you have the space where you work, keeping a little bit of the materials out as a reminder helps ease jumping back into it when you’re in the mood, in my case at least
@@marcellava I've now written my 7 or so half-complete/incomplete projects into my trusty journal, thanks!
It sorta helps, (especially with the big picture thing lol)
Is it me or do you also jump from projects to projects until you're like 'nah, I'll do it next month or next year'
@@lepos4136 Glad I could offer some tips, and oh yea, most definitely
I have 3 paintings I’ve started/prepped for 1-2 yrs ago, they were each fairly large tho and I got overwhelmed after starting them, they’re all currently paused
Since then I’ve crocheted abt 10 stuffed animals none bigger than 5ins tall, paint/decorate 7 mini boxes from the dollar store, and sewn 1 small makeup bag for my mom, but those paintings go untouched so far
They’re all in view near my crafts area, and a daily reminder I need to get to it at some point, but that’s okay with me, I *know* I’ll work on them at some point, but also achieving many smaller projects makes me feel accomplished too
Multiple of these had me sharing with a friend and crying to celebrate epiphanies I just had.
Great advice for us ENFPs. Thank you.
I appreciate #5 so much. Some time ago I saw a video talking about the shadow of each type. Ti was considered the weak point of the enfp and the person who created the video said that enfps have no logos and are blind to it. Which I don't experience as true at all. Yes, I am more intuitive and I will take a leap of faith over a logical choice. But I understand logos much better than most people and easily got straight a's in logic based courses in high school and uni (law, philosophy, chemistry, accounting, for example).
I agree to the things you've mentioned about us ENFPs (well to me to be exact). You are right that we constantly try to evaluate our beliefs (and my thoughts and behaviors) that makes me realize to change or be more observant how it affects to people. Like when I'm talking about a topic I'm really passionate about, tendency is I get loud, fast and eager to let the other person know the other angle or such possibility, but because along the way I've noticed not all people can't accommodate the upbeat I'm into, the next time around, I tend to examine his/her frequency first to match with so i can deliver it according to (what i think his/her pace is). Being a ENFP can be hard hahahah but fulfilling when they get amazed with our way of thinking! 😂
Really fantastic as always. You always take care to really give nuanced, insightful, specific information, not just clickbaity generalities and the same tired tropes.
As a 35-year-old ENFP I not only agreed with everything you said but also found that many of your points were big life lessons that I had come to over years of experience, lessons that I knew applied to my personality type very specifically, and which I value highly. As per your last point, it took a lot of trial and error sometimes to figure these things out, and maybe I would have always needed that, even if I had seen your video beforehand.
However, I'm sure this video will plant the seed of understanding in many minds, even if they still need to go and make those mistakes anyway. It puts a clear "name" to those behaviours in a way that helps you identify them more easily.
One of the reasons I wanted to do this particular series for all of the types is so I could go into little bit more detail than usual. It's great to hear that you're enjoying it! ~ Nathan
Thank you so much. This is rather accurate and its inspiring me to use my energy to try and complete some of the many creative projects I've got half started. Also, yes, went to a gig on Saturday, totally excited to see everyone, burnt all my energy out and was feeling knackered by the end and the last two days I've enjoyed being at home. I love people, I particularly love chatting online too (I can be in several twitch streams at once or have multiple conversations open) but my, do I try to be a friend to everyone :) Its good, but I do have to work on the "you can't pour from an empty cup" aspect!
Wowza an enfp video on my birthday?! How’d you know?! 😅🖤
My hero!! This is sooooo good. Love your logic & advice! You are literally readjusting the idealism into more realistic expectations. THANK YOU!
I agree, I agre, I agree !!!! I agree with all of that! Which is quite rare i would say... A lot of people just talk nonsense about enfp's and that's hurt me personally. I hate being unundertand, that stressed me a lot. But in your videos ... yeah I finally reconized myself. I feel understand so thank you ! yeah!
It is actually scary how accurate and helpful this advice is. It feels like you have looked into my brain and whole life story in order to make this video(ENFP)
6 is good, I found out about that and it helps. AND also wait with people bc the first enthusiasm and idealising will change in most cases, just try to count that in to not have people get closer than you later want them. Same idea but for people
and note: if you are suoerwarm just by habit, some people expect you are now best friends. Think before to know who you really want to think that and with who to better dial down abit
Oh, I love 2) Yes I do. I have come to the conclusion- it better be this time, anyway- that I , being a lateral thinker, am ENFP on one side and ISFJ on the other, with a weird mix of whatever they can both form best when stressed which is when I go to mid-ground. Though, I don't know how they put together ISTP and ENTP. But, whatever. It's an explanation that works for me. And, most importantly to how I started this comment, I spent a great deal of time with people asking me "Do you have to be so weird?" and "Can't you just be normal?" in my younger days. The latter of which I just started answering with "If this isn't normal, then, no!"
Managing my energy (and excitement) is the toughest one for me. Having manic depressive disorder doesn't help, but as I get older I've gotten a lot better about it.
I’m 50/50 ENFP and INFP. I’ve been called weird and magical my whole life. I became a high-school Theatre Arts teacher. I wrote my own stage-play adaptation of Alice in Wonderland…stuff like that. Nothing I do is linear. That can make the boring side of life - balancing checkbooks, doing your taxes, etc - very difficult.
I started to cry at 12 😭
Your video couldn't have come at a better time - while I'm currently struggling to write the backstory and future arc of an ENFP character :)
This video rockfor s! Helpful advice and info about ENFP . After some time , I have realized (with the help of your videos !) that I am an ambivert . I knew I was an extrovert but not a stereotypical one- I enjoy and need more downtime then most .❤🌈💜🐾🐾
Ohhhhh I love the the way you are nonchalantly sitting side saddle on your chair at the tea party. Are you drinking a cuppa mouse though??!!! A cup of tea, some fancy headwear and a nice slice of fantasy often helps ENFPs deal with many of the points in your video. Particularly number 2.
Thanks man, very relatable!
ENFP
As an ENFP who doesn't like rigid rules, I already want to break rule no. 1
Literally I hate rules
12# god damn dude , you've hit the nail on the coffin with this one
Mr. Nathan i just went to your website to check out if I could be typed since I just cant get it right I feel :/ and i made a mindblowing discovery! Good Sir you are an introvert?!? And all this time I thought you where an extrovert that created an online stage character who is fun and witty with an diffidently (don't know if I found the right translation there) distinguished twist. Now I guess you are just epic like that :)
Please keep up the great work :D
Thank you so much! This was so spot on! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
YASSS! Thank you ! This time it’s my type
Not going to give up my creativity for anything. And enfp are not only artist. The amount of concentration and hours of learning when we are into the topic can be owerwhelming for others.
nr 4 that is so true, I have a stabile job that allowes me to pursue my hobbies and the job itself is something I enjoy.
#5 (Trust Your Logic) oooh and #6 (energy)!!
I want to share #8 (social energy) and #12 (don't live linear)with everyone I know!!! Great video!
Wow. Just wow. Thank you. THANK YOU.
Okay… I love you. That is all. 😭🤓
Love… accepted.
Some of these things I live by, and some are sooo hard and I don’t ever want to have to do them.
have to do lists! lists of what you wish list for, what you ened to get done what you wanna do today!
Oh my gosh it's me!!!! Thank you this helps so much!!
I don't have a clue why this made me cry but thank you.
- an enfp
Super accurate and helpful! Thank you😄
Thank you for this!
Where are all my pessimistic ENFPs at?
Thats possible ? ! :d
🙋🏻♀️
I suspect being a pessimistic ENFP has something to do with your channel name, at least for me anyway 🤣 when you know too much...
Managing my energy is something I should really learn to do🤧
I didn't know about the myer-briggs type when I was tested. Understand Myer Briggs typing I would have answered the correctly to turn out as an ENFP type. DAM
My date is enfp and he doesn't really care about this personality thing ,while I infp learning about him 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Just realising ENFP s could be ADHD.( I'm enfp and just diagnosed with adhd)
My friend is the same and I'm currently in the process to finding if I also have it. I think enfps function very similarly to those with adhd. Buy to an enfp with adhd is interesting.
#6 careful ENFPs, we need balance. Don't limit your projects too much either, also dangerous.
Great enfp video
And as an ENFP.... Done at 4, surprised I made it that long....
As a true ENFP flexing my Si I'm trying to watch this video one rule at a time on a weekly basis 😅
First one here, anyway hello!
Can I please have the transcript? this is gold. literal gold.
I like your content! 🖤
I don’t think innovation is boring!
I would love one of these for ENTJs...although I suspect I already know what you would say :p
Being an ENFP,, I saw the word "rules" and I turned off the video
Hi Nathan!! Just a quick hello from an enfp.
#4 is fantastic advice
Making my left cheekbone itchy.
Making my left collarbone shoulder itchy.
Lots of good advice here.
Don't change enfp - love infp❤
How do you know us so well! I love this take on how we function.
The number 9, I could see ENFPs basing this all on misunderstandings. Would you still consider that healthy?
Behind my neck, left side.
Me watching this as an ENTP
No matter which test I take, I'm an ENFP, or INFP. When I was younger, more toward the E. As an older person, more I. But still, It's 40/60 ish. Sometimes I wonder about it.
Hoping for an entj version 😌
I likes all your rules, except the first one.
INTJ
we enfp have te, considered with using logic but doesnt settle down to a frame work and.advocating that frame work, thats why people may see us ilogical because our logic constantly change as we grab more ideas with ne
Number 10 😂 that hit me ngl