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Thanks for your comment. We’re curious about what you feel the greatest love for you is.

Thank you for sharing part of your story here. I hope that you're getting the connection that you need and absolutely deserve and I'm glad that your family is accepting of your sexuality. If only institutions could see a humans' worth and worthiness beyond their perceptions of sexuality. All the best to you, too.

We always find it helpful to know that with awareness comes choice. @Alexismontero3771 - you're now in control of what you do next. How awesome is that?

We're so glad that you're here and thank you for that lovely feedback!

Thank you for sharing this insight. Do love hotels serve an important purpose in this situation?

@@humansconnecting Actually, bath houses are more popular. Anonymous, unentangled, cheap.

We're here for these truths and what happens when we accept them and start to get the connection we've been missing.

Glad you liked it!

Thanks for your comment. And yes, you're right: being alone is different to being lonely. Being alone can be - as you say - a choice. There can sometimes be a certain nobility in being alone, can't there? We can find ourselves when we are alone, for example. Loneliness is often not a choice and an unwelcome, undesired state.

Thank you for sharing part of your life's journey with us here. It's important to note that it's often uncomfortable and, well, awful for everyone involved, but it does get better. What's a message you'd share with your earlier self now you're on this side of your divorce?

I'm glad that you enjoy them - both the content and the legs that help me get the content to you.

Thank you for sharing some of your story with us. It's always a privilege. I really want to avoid platitudes or trite advice to support you. I also know that there's not a silver bullet to have you getting the kind of soul-nourishing connection you absolutely deserve. So my advice/suggestion is simple: keep choosing connection. Choose connection at every opportunity you can get: online or in person. It's tough when it feels like others are in a rush or otherwise feel that they aren't prioritising connection with you. But always remember that you're worthy of love and belonging right now. I hope that wasn't too trite!

Happy New Year to you, too! Although I'm getting to your comment quite a while after New Year. I hope that you're going well in 2024. Yes, I noticed that sometimes the advice offered online didn't go to where I needed it to go - or offered quick fixes. I created what I once needed and wished I'd had available to me.

Hello 🙂 Thank you so much for your kind gesture, you made my day! Enjoy yourself and keep up the good work🙂@@humansconnecting

I hope that you're going OK now. Thanks for your comment.

How are you going? Thank you for your comment. I though that I'd already responded to your comment a while ago, but I see that I hadn't. I'm sorry about that. And you're right: our younger selves never thought that we needed to learn and practice other skills to set us up later in life. Have you read this blog post? It may give you something to inspire you to make friends: www.thelonelinessguy.com/post/20211104-how-to-make-friends-as-a-gay-man

Absolutely. And you’re right. It’s hard to not sound like a cliché, but love, understanding and acceptance are all inside jobs first, aren’t they?

No content yet on long-distance relationships. But for now, it’s tough to maintain connection when there’s a physical distance without being purposeful and intentional about it. And thanks! That was a great chat with Andrew. He offers so much wisdom and insight here.

@@humansconnectingThank you for the response!

I agree! Sorry for the jankiness…

Thanks! I’m glad that you got something from it

I'm so glad you got something from it, Michael!

Glad it was helpful, Jon Carl!

Thanks! I don’t know who you are either, but I accept the compliment. I hope that my content also supports you.

Thanks for your comment and for sharing your thoughts. It does often feel that the other half have it better than where we can find ourselves. Traditional structures can offer safety as well as being confining. When we live outside of those traditional structures, we can also find that we want the same safety and opportunities everyone else seems to have. Going deeper than the general beliefs we each hold, we each get to dig deeper and create what we need if it’s not there already.

You're right.But I always find great power in the knowledge that I can only control my own words, thoughts and actions. I cannot ever control anyone else's (but that doesn't mean I've never tried!). When I speak and act according to my values, then I can honestly say that I've shown up at my best, even if the response doesn't go well. Worrying about what other people think and what they will say or do is a game that we can never win. So why play?

I’m glad you found it! Thanks for sharing your comment.

Thank you for the comment, @winnied87. While it's not often the cheeriest of topics, I firmly believe that the way to get the connect we each need is to sit with loneliness and listen to what it's telling us about the connection we're missing. I'm so grateful that you're here and that the content is reaching you.

This is relatable. It doesn't help if you are conditioned to be a certain way since childhood and your close friends were covert bullies, too. At some point, you realise you are different (not a bad thing!) and begin to seek answers. It's a whole new journey and level of depth to self-discovery! I wish everyone strength and send hugs. Together we are stronger.

Yeah, @rpliegos we absolutely can be our own harshest judges. I feel that rather than shutting mine up (which never worked as it just got louder and louder until I listened), I learned to sit with my inner critic - who I've named Joe - and listen to him. Joe simply wants me to stay safe and small so I don't get hurt again. However, I'm able to sit with Joe and tell him that while we're scared, we also know some other techniques to help me show up in the world and I know I have great people to support me. Perhaps that approach could support you, too. Thanks for being here and for your comment! I'm glad you're here. =)

The close friends as covert bullies really hit me in the guts. Fantastic insight!

@@humansconnecting Thanks a lot for the insights, it really helps us in our internal analysis!

Yes, we all feel lonely from time to time, sometimes we can even feel lonely most of the time. While it’s a horrible feeling, it’s only made better when we talk about it and realise that we all experience it and we’re our best source of support. Thank you for taking the time to comment. I’m glad the video supported you. Keep being awesomely human x

You’re very welcome, and I’m thrilled that it’s supported you. The messages are timeless, so even though it’s older content, it’s relevant for a long time to come. I’m also happy to see that you’re putting yourself out there and making connections beyond your own excellent connection to yourself. However your relationship turns out, you’re getting benefits from how you’re showing up right now. This is fantastic; keep going!

Thanks. Yes, being a people-pleaser is tough. We often don’t know how to connect with other people without being overly nice. We each get to explore other ways of being and connecting with ourselves, those most important to us and our communities that don’t have us compromising ourselves in the hope that someone will like us and accept us.

Thanks for your comment. The point of the video is to remind you and all the other viewers that you are enough, right now, just as you are. Waiting until we’re ready enough before we allow ourselves to be seen and heard means that we don’t feel that we belong. When we don’t feel that we belong, we feel lonely. There’s a freedom in accepting that people are going to judge us no matter what we do, so we may as well be who we are. Some will judge negatively, others positively. Either way, when we’re being our selves, the connections we make and feel are the connections we need.

I love that you’re here. I’m going really well! Hope that you’re going awesomely

Thank you for your comment and kind words. If only appearances, job title, income, social standing, address or anything else made us immune to the human condition. Alas, no. It's up to us all to accept and then talk about our loneliness in a way that uplifts and supports each other. Thanks for being here.

@@humansconnecting Thanks for the response. This is true about acceptance and being open. I believe finding happines within can also help to keep pushing and living life regardless of being alone. Discussions like this are very relatable and feel like a warm friendly hug. Happy to have found your content.

No worries! I hope it supported you in some way.

I can only imagine how losing someone after a 45 year relationship would feel, SG. The loneliness experienced through grief and loss is awful. There are no quick words that I can offer that will fix it - even though I'd love to know what words to use to help lighten your load - except to say that I find comfort in the thought that grief is love that has nowhere to go. You're more brave and courageous than you'll ever give yourself credit for. It hurts, but you will get through x

Hi Joseph, thank you for sharing some of your loneliness story here. I love a good roast dinner. The smell of roast lamb always reminds me of home. Perhaps there's something in the thoughts and feelings that you 'should' be sitting down to eat with someone. Perhaps these thoughts and feelings are nudging you towards connection. I receive many messages from others who are thinking and feeling the same way. The someone is often interpreted to mean a significant other. Is that true in this case? Food has a wonderful way of bringing people together to connect. Perhaps there's a Sunday lunch club nearby or - if not - perhaps this is something you can start in your area. Social media can be a great way to start up a local group. I hope that's helpful. Thanks for your awesome and courageous share x

I know how you feel...I lost my love 20 years ago...never found anyone else...

I’m sorry to hear this, Greg. Thank you for providing some support here. What helps you get through the tough times?

i wish you the best

Hi! What you wrote really moved me and I do echo your feelings. I doubt you are lingering on weird things or enjoying self indulgence. I sense you have been going trough a rough period. Certainly you are as brave as to communicate your discomfort, this makes you appear better than a huge bunch of stuck up poseurs. I wish you happiness and peace of mind. Sincerely Giorgio 🙂Should you feel like it, you are welcome to drop me a line!

Thanks!

So glad you liked it, Denny! I hope that you’re going awesomely and being authentically you. The world needs you being you ❤

I’m glad you stumbled here! You’re very welcome.

Thank you. But in what way?

I don't know you, where you're from or know your circumstances. I also doubt that a response on TH-cam will do much to change your views or anyone else's views. However, the Acknowledgement of Country is important to me. I live, work and raise my family on land that was stolen. There are people in my community who feel unseen, unheard and that they don't belong because of the collective shame we feel in this country. I'm committed to doing my part to create a community in which all feel welcomed and that they belong.

@@humansconnecting Great answer.

Thank you. NOT talking about loneliness serves no one. I feel it's time to own it and make informed choices about getting the authentic connection we each need.

Isn't he great? I'm glad that his story resonates with you. In what ways are you similar?

Thanks for coming on! It was such an amazing chat on a subject on which we can find really hard to engage. Keep up your great work!