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We're Dehumanising Ourselves: Gender Essentialism, Mormon Trad Wives and 'Girl' Culture
Welcome to From The Diving Board!
In this episode we explore the intersection of conservative values, choice feminism and traditional gender roles across mormon trad wife content and ‘girl’ culture on social media. Is it okay to enjoy this content under the guise of irony? Or are we dehumanising the experience of womanhood? Let’s dive in.
Timestamps:
00:00 introduction
05:37 political context
07:46 the rise in mormon momfluencers
18:01 meta irony & nara smith
21:37 the madonna wh*** dichotomy
27:23 the “girlification” of everything
34:29 conclusion
⁺˚⋆。°✩₊✩°。⋆˚⁺⁺˚⋆。°✩₊✩°。⋆˚⁺⁺˚⋆。°✩₊✩°。⋆˚⁺⁺˚⋆。°✩₊✩°。⋆˚⁺
Follow my socials!
Instagram: charli.chats
TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@charlichatspod
Rate my show on Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/3x5s7DATP1LXAndFl8rt4i?si=42568028de444307
Link to previous video:
th-cam.com/video/jJFLbrnbAwg/w-d-xo.htmlsi=iotTuOAtH4pSVokZ
Sources (in order of reference):
Shanspeare, Girl Math & Girl Power: The Conservative Politics of ‘Girl World’ th-cam.com/video/BaKs8iJpG6c/w-d-xo.htmlsi=PFlh9TNai2uO0RN1
Madisyn Brown, The Rise of Conservativism in Gen Z th-cam.com/video/fmtN-CupRLg/w-d-xo.htmlsi=zg2tcrHZplk8SvEn
The F Word Magazine, Choice Feminism: New and Hip, but Not Necessarily Good: upennfword.com/2019/11/04/choice-feminism/
Tom Ough, The ideological divide between men and women is growing. What’s happening? www.independent.co.uk/life-style/conservative-right-wing-men-progressive-women-b2488939.html
CNN Politics, Election 2024: Exit Polls edition.cnn.com/election/2024/exit-polls/national-results/general/president/0
David Campbell, Mormon leaders - whose church is often associated with the GOP - push back against one-party politics theconversation.com/mormon-leaders-whose-church-is-often-associated-with-the-gop-push-back-against-one-party-politics-209296
Emma Spector, Mormon Momfluencer Culture Obsession www.vogue.com/article/mormon-momfluencer-culture-obsession
Alyssa Grenfell, Why are there so many mormon influencers (a theory) th-cam.com/video/MGXggLIafrc/w-d-xo.htmlsi=yFxJdtQHj8DIDyMN
Kitty Lloyd, The allure of the domestic goddess: Tradwives, Nara Smith and Gen Z www.ensemblemagazine.co.nz/articles/tradwives-nara-smith-and-gen-z
The Irony of Irony: Is Gen Z Scared of Showing Sincerity:
www.nouse.co.uk/articles/2024/06/19/the-irony-of-irony-is-gen-z-scared-of-showing-sincerity-
Jessica Grose, Can ‘The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives’ Change a Conservative Religious Culture? www.nytimes.com/2024/09/07/opinion/mormon-wives-reality-tv-show.html
Sophie Gilbert, MomTok Is the Apotheosis of 21st-Century Womanhood, www.theatlantic.com/culture/archive/2024/10/momtok-secret-lives-of-mormon-wives-review-feminism-beauty-domesticity/680410/
Macy Browning Karasik Article, Digital “Girl” Culture: Postfeminist Sensibilities of Social Media “Girl” Trends www.jsr.org/index.php/path/article/view/2429/1458
Catherine Rottenberg, Women Who Work
www.dazeddigital.com/life-culture/article/60629/1/why-girl-trends-need-to-stop-girl-dinner-girl-math
Rosalind Gill, Culture and Subjectivity in Neoliberal and Postfeminist Times link.springer.com/article/10.1057/sub.2008.28
Rebecca Jennings, “Girl” trends and the repackaging of womanhood
www.vox.com/culture/23831903/girl-dinner-tiktok-trends-hot-girl-walk
⁺˚⋆。°✩₊✩°。⋆˚⁺⁺˚⋆。°✩₊✩°。⋆˚⁺⁺˚⋆。°✩₊✩°。⋆˚⁺⁺˚⋆。°✩₊✩°。⋆˚⁺
business enquiries only: andersoncharli@outlook.com
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ความคิดเห็น

  • @ruthydrawsalot1979
    @ruthydrawsalot1979 วันที่ผ่านมา

    It’s just the resurgence or rather ever changing form of yt supremacy that’s palatable for some ppl. Then soon those same ppl will claim yt supremacist Nazis being bold in the west is just coincidence.

  • @coolchameleon21
    @coolchameleon21 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    the lady at 16:00 is creeping me out

  • @BeccaCalaRoarr3
    @BeccaCalaRoarr3 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    True charlie! i recognize and salute how professional and unbiased you appear to remain because i would not have been nearly so "nice" or polite when talking about the wealthy scam of mormon church, though it is people like you who are not so rude about it (even though they deserve it) that can get poor people who have been so mentally abused to believe it to listen to you and open their eyes when otherwise they were told to stay away from content that insults their beliefs. Keep doing what you do and Hello / helLlo from Canada! ~ Roarr!

  • @Perifore
    @Perifore 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Such a great video!!! Love thinking back to the "end of the world" raves in 2012. That was the end of the recession and things were getting better.

  • @afrofaeries
    @afrofaeries 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I need women to know that approaching womanhood is not something to fear about. it’s just a different shade of yellow.

  • @pronoydutta614
    @pronoydutta614 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

    These people have this aura of grifting lameness around them that I can't shake. Millions of women in Asia actually live this and they're not exactly glamorizing it.

  • @rondleberg
    @rondleberg 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

    hope this doesnt come across as rude but im 99% sure shanspeare uses they/them prns :)

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Ahh thank you!

  • @rebeccagibson9644
    @rebeccagibson9644 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Yes, you are being brainwashed

  • @spookyjones6577
    @spookyjones6577 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

    About the ballerina farms: That woman isnt getting the money from her work. Her husband owns that LLC. The reason why she didnt like the article is because shes trapped and is simply trying to survive.

  • @peggy_0435
    @peggy_0435 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Lola Young sang it so well “cause I’m too messy then I’m too f***ing clean” Why is it such a shock to the world that women are multidimensional?? Why must we exist in neat boxes and subsequently police our mind body and soul in order to adhere to society’s desired (accepted) view of femininity. Why have basic survival techniques become avenues for performance?? Like - no this is not ‘girl dinner’ it’s just a plate full of ingredients that I managed to pull together after a long day at work or uni, and I’m broke and haven’t shopped for a week. My inability to feed myself a fully nutritious meal every so often has got absolutely nothing to do with my gender. Stop commodifying my existence. I’m not just a girl, and I deny such a saying being a scapegoat for ignorance or stupidity. Don’t get me wrong, I love a doom-scroll occasionally but consuming content without critical thinking is a recipe for disaster. And that disaster looks like an impenetrable echo chamber. An echo chamber where our cutesy brains needn’t develop because our tiny little dainty phones have told us all that it means to exist in the world - to mirror and to align to the point where our understanding of ‘self’ is inextricably connected to the collective. Ironic huh!!

  • @tristynallen6706
    @tristynallen6706 4 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Nara smith has literally said she cooks everything from scratch because of her health issues, she also has two full time jobs and has never claimed to be a trad wife because she's not people always put her in the videos and it makes zero sense

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 4 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Interesting! I think this actually adds to the confusion about who she is and what she represents as I discussed in the video, particularly because these jobs she has are never really at the forefront of her content - she appears to the average viewer as a tradwife, which seems like an intentional choice.

    • @coolchameleon21
      @coolchameleon21 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

      lmao

  • @giselapitchrider774
    @giselapitchrider774 4 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Yessss, finally someone said it!

  • @littlesometin
    @littlesometin 4 วันที่ผ่านมา

    you're doing a good job!

  • @POSSIBLYHIGH
    @POSSIBLYHIGH 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Overall no matter what women do they will always unfortunately get hated on. I’m beyond over it I’m like actually being forced to just accept it.. which I don’t! Because it’s JUST NOT FKING FAIR BRO for us women for ALL goddam women it is NOT fair.

    • @littlesometin
      @littlesometin 4 วันที่ผ่านมา

      these are two extremes portrayed in the video bruh, most women fall into neither, we're just talking about how these extremes portrayed in social media can affect us, pay closer attention next time

    • @Capunderpants
      @Capunderpants 4 วันที่ผ่านมา

      ​@@littlesometin yeah as a woman I learned to ignore gender stereotypes being sold to me for profit by snake oil salesmen. be yourself gender stereotypes don't define your personality or sex.

  • @marthaanthony2081
    @marthaanthony2081 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

    You you please put a link to your apple podcast, I can’t find it anywhere

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      So sorry! There seems to be a problem with the podcast showing on the app, I'm looking into it and will post the link in the description when I figure it out. xx

  • @emmagallagher9938
    @emmagallagher9938 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

    wow very incisive video. i found your thoughts on tradwives particularly interesting as I'm currently working on an essay about tradwives for my master's degree (with Neeleman as one of the subjects) and I've fallen into the rabbi hole of all things tradwife. i think your point about Mormon women being paid to promote the church has some real weight behind it and points to something very sinister to do with tradwives. in my essay one of the perspectives I'm taking is that tradwives (Mormon or otherwise) are promoting an ideological brand, encouraging women to give in to their biological difference and submit to their husbands. this becomes dangerous when you remember most of these women are monetising their content and therefore do not have to rely on their husbands as heavily as the average women in a traditional marriage which becomes more important if they have to leave their husbands, there's also the fact that oftentimes tradwife content promotes returning to a 'better time' when traditional marriages were the norm complicating the idea that this is simply a choice they make for their families and carries white supremacist undertones (although sometimes this is expressed outright). i think tradwife content is most definitely a response to late stage capitalism which women are bearing the brunt of. anyways sorry for the extremely long comment just wanted to share my thoughts on the matter. there are hidden meanings and agendas to everything we see online and people should remain critical of what they see on social media.

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Oh my gosh if possible I would absolutely love to read your thesis when it’s finished! It sounds fascinating! Good luck 🩵

    • @scorpieeeee
      @scorpieeeee 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

      does this only have to do with “white supremacism”? other cultures also have a similar patriarchal social organization. like asians, etc... have their own versions of supremacism. something like the “yamato nadeshiko” trope is an example of the fact that non-white cultures have their own ideas that coincide in meaning with the american “tradwife” but, yes, they want to drag women into working for these systems so that groups of men compete with each other

    • @BeccaCalaRoarr3
      @BeccaCalaRoarr3 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Whoa true thank you for pursuing education and may your essay have all the scams busted ~ Roarr!

  • @beagle9662
    @beagle9662 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

    i find it really interesting how most mormon influencers are women. Of course they’re selling their ideas to other women, but they’re also able to pull men into mormonism by showing a “good submissive housewife”. just interesting how the mormon women can seemingly sell the lifestyle to all, while the mormon men cant sell it to anyone (generally speaking). i love ur vids btw!!

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Love this take! You’re so right, somehow women have more power in the “recruiting stage” but less in the real lifestyle. I wonder how that compares to missions - I know a lot of men go on missions for the church but will have to look into it! Thank you so much for watching 🩵

    • @kat-cg6dy
      @kat-cg6dy 4 วันที่ผ่านมา

      american men have been promised the “american dream” for so long that they cannot fathom that many women don’t want traditional relationships. so when they see all these mormon women momfluencers they project onto other women that they should be like that. they get their “american dream” with a mormon housewife.

  • @mezrac
    @mezrac 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

    i love the way you explain things

  • @charlichats
    @charlichats 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I'm super interested in your thoughts on this one, do you think that engaging ironically with 'girl' trends and tradwife content is harmless?

    • @ribbitdraws1480
      @ribbitdraws1480 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

      its harmless to a point, I think, but like all trends, we can't pretend they exist in a vacuum. For some people who are very online, internet trends are their main source of reference for how real people are (usually, this happens to boys, which is why so many 'gamers' think women are brainless). There's also the fact that if you repeat something enough, you believe it. If we keep calling ourselves girls and conforming to traditionalism, even if only for quick tiktoks, the more we consume and make that content, the more it influences us. I believe it absolutely has consequences.

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@ribbitdraws1480 such an interesting point about repeating something enough until you believe it!

    • @peggy_0435
      @peggy_0435 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Lola Young sang it so well “cause I’m too messy then I’m too f***ing clean” Why is it such a shock to the world that women are multidimensional?? Why must we exist in neat boxes and subsequently police our mind body and soul in order to adhere to society’s desired (accepted) view of femininity. Why have basic survival techniques become avenues for performance?? Like - no this is not ‘girl dinner’ it’s just a plate full of ingredients that I managed to pull together after a long day at work or uni, and I’m broke and haven’t shopped for a week. My inability to feed myself a fully nutritious meal every so often has got absolutely nothing to do with my gender. Stop commodifying my existence. I’m not just a girl, and I deny such a saying being a scapegoat for ignorance or stupidity. Don’t get me wrong, I love a doom-scroll occasionally but consuming content without critical thinking is a recipe for disaster. And that disaster looks like an impenetrable echo chamber. An echo chamber where our cutesy brains needn’t develop because our tiny little dainty phones have told us all that it means to exist in the world - to mirror and to align to the point where our understanding of ‘self’ is inextricably connected to the collective. Ironic huh!!

    • @sqwggy
      @sqwggy 4 วันที่ผ่านมา

      too many people fixate on the tradwives and girl-cores, and not the overall trend of gender essentialism being driven by white supremacy And capitalism And patriarchy. girl dinner or nara smith meal, historically speaking flaunting food imagery is a way of communicating wealth and status. there's a level of opulent spectacle in tradwife content featuring expensive, aesthetically pleasing kitchens. this is not comparable to the shared humor in girl dinner, personally, it feels too similar to other working class humor. simplifying the current media landscape to girl vs boy and woman vs man kills me.

  • @Brandyalla
    @Brandyalla 7 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Knitting is a superior craft

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      I reckon it’s way harder!! So maybe haha

    • @Brandyalla
      @Brandyalla 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@charlichats For me it's the opposite; I was never able to grok crochet, but took to knitting right away. Really, though, it depends on your aim. Clothing: knitting Toys or bags: crochet. Although I have knitted perfectly fine toys and bags, so who knows

  • @neko_neko_ni
    @neko_neko_ni 8 วันที่ผ่านมา

    im hearing it while crocheting

  • @MyNamesChai
    @MyNamesChai 10 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Fantastic video 🤟

  • @vesimaisteri
    @vesimaisteri 10 วันที่ผ่านมา

    My school has started this "crochet a granny square" protect where all the squares made by students will be made into a blanket for everyone to use. So I was hanging around and one girl I knew wanted to learn how to do it and I decided it wouldn't hurt to try too, so then there were like 6 people telling us how to do it. Took me a week and 3 attempts ( I accidentally made a ball) before I had a granny square in my hands and this past week I've just been doing squares and ended up buying myself a hook yesterday lol.An hour ago I also made a snowflake! :D

  • @aycanadgozel688
    @aycanadgozel688 10 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Such an amazing, well-thought out and researched video! I learned so much too, thank you for sharing

  • @charlichats
    @charlichats 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Thank you so much for your amazing engagement! You can now watch and listen to this video essay on Spotify as well with my new show From the Diving Board: open.spotify.com/show/3x5s7DATP1LXAndFl8rt4i?si=847866f20064424d

  • @charlichats
    @charlichats 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Thank you so much for your amazing engagement! You can now watch and listen to this video essay on Spotify as well with my new show From the Diving Board: open.spotify.com/show/3x5s7DATP1LXAndFl8rt4i?si=847866f20064424d

  • @unallamaa
    @unallamaa 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Learned to crochet in 2022, fucked up my wrists but I still love it and do it to this day! I’ve even sold some pieces to neighbors and such.

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Omg yeah the pain is not spoken about enough 😅😂

  • @XOXOchickyXOXO
    @XOXOchickyXOXO 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

    When I was a freshmen in high school the chunky infinity scarf was all the rage. I had to have one then found out they were like $80.😱 For a scarf. For an acrylic scarf😡! Absolutely not🤬. And that’s where my crochet journey started 😂. And now I have a yarn addiction, so yeah that’s how it’s going 😂😊

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      So resourceful! Love it haha

  • @kiraward
    @kiraward 12 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Just stumbled across your page and instant follow! Videos are amazing and so interesting, look forward to seeing what else you’ll put out! X

  • @clickitypepper4792
    @clickitypepper4792 13 วันที่ผ่านมา

    The "yay" sound effect was a little too loud on headphones, just letting you know.

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      I’ve changed the sound for my future videos so hopefully that’s no longer an issue. Thanks for letting me know!

  • @AnawithoneN
    @AnawithoneN 13 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I got into it this spring, because I saw that crochet pieces became popular and on trend, and I remembered that I loved it back when I was at school (but it was embarrassing to do in the 2000s so I stopped when I became a teenager😅) It's really cool to be able to create almost anything, depending on your desire and skills 🔥 and the feeling of "girlie energy" somehow makes me feel good after being this boss lady

  • @thatbosgirl
    @thatbosgirl 14 วันที่ผ่านมา

    It's interesting to watch this and read the comments because I think of crochet as a fast fashion hobby. What I've seen from other people is a "replacement" of fast fashion that still overconsumes, buying endless amounts of plastic yarn that sits in a corner and is never actually completely used, or crocheting anything that's trendy only to never use or wear it because it's not what the person actually likes when the trend is over, and like others have said it can be hard to sell as the time and supplies make crochet works expensive. I'm happy to hear so many people in the comments talking about how the hobby helped them through tough times, or how they are intentional with what and how they're making! It's nice to see, and a good "check" for me to not get too jaded lol. I didn't know the political history either, that's super cool!

  • @asteria5382
    @asteria5382 14 วันที่ผ่านมา

    meanwhile i just got into crochet because it's relatively cheap compared to other hobbies when you buy a $10 hook set and $3 skeins of yarn for hours of frustration/entertainment lmfao

  • @KatieLeyden
    @KatieLeyden 15 วันที่ผ่านมา

    What was the intro song ????🤭

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 12 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Osmosis Jones - Beyonce Signs (OJ's Taurus Bootleg) [BELTERS] 🩵

  • @archelyaichigo967
    @archelyaichigo967 16 วันที่ผ่านมา

    For me, it's a way to create something specific that I want (plushy, clothes) by myself with limited costs. I often just bought knitted or crocheted clothes in a second-hand store, especially on a sale, turning it into the yarn and making clothes that I like. And crocheted and knitting very forgiven on mistakes. If we compare sewing and crocheted

  • @adrianacardenas289
    @adrianacardenas289 17 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I have been crocheting for 10 years and selling for 7. Before the pandemic, there were about 5 people selling in my hometown, during and after the pandemic we rose to 70 people. We are a fairly small town and there is an overpopulation of crocheters. 🤣🤣 The sad thing is that everyone is selling but no one is buying 😢😢

  • @MamsirMamsir
    @MamsirMamsir 20 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I think that something missing from this discourse is a fact that synthetic (acrylic & polyester) yarn is for the most part terribly unsustainable & highly advertised on social media/made available more than natural yarns in big box shops. Demand for it contributes to the millions microplastics it sheds daily onto surfaces, into water systems in the wash, and into the air. In purchasing and using synthetic yarn, you are creating more trash. By trash, I mean, a garment that in 90% likelihood cannot be recycled into anything new or composted into the earth in an ecologically harmless manner. Sure it is usually cheaper, it comes in pretty colors, it is soft (at first) but it will not wear well or look/feel new in just a handful of washes unless you get some premium synthetic yarn. At that rate, you are just better off getting something that will compost down (cotton, bamboo, wool, linen, silk, hemp, banana, alpaca, or any other plant and animal based fiber options) at the end if its life. I beg any person who has started up on the fiber arts journey, consider how there is no “away” for your plastic yarn. That it will float in the ocean and choke out life on this planet long after you are gone.

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Very true! I always like to use sustainable yarn where I can, but it’s not very accessible and quite pricey. I guess a lot of people don’t have the privilege to buy it, but I take your point!

  • @Sofia-ci1cg
    @Sofia-ci1cg 21 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Pls I need recommendations of crochet modern clothing tutorials 😭 any channel?

  • @BebertAharonson
    @BebertAharonson 22 วันที่ผ่านมา

    This is a great video! Thank you so much here kislux for making my budget look more reasonable.

  • @beagle9662
    @beagle9662 24 วันที่ผ่านมา

    i just found your channel and i love it. cant wait for more vids! hope you’re well:)

    • @charlichats
      @charlichats 12 วันที่ผ่านมา

      thank you!! Xxx

  • @hiraimaria
    @hiraimaria 26 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I started it during the pandemic cuz i was depressed, and it helped me a lot!

  • @alexandriadillhoff7069
    @alexandriadillhoff7069 28 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Haha I have been crocheting for 25 years (I'm 32) and I love that we have better patterns and yarns to work with now days. ❤

  • @queenarashichan
    @queenarashichan 29 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I'm obsessed because fast fashion can't live up to the quality of handmade products

  • @chickensit
    @chickensit หลายเดือนก่อน

    Crocheted for 20 years and gen z made me hate it

  • @sithuki8723
    @sithuki8723 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Gen alpha folk here, I love it, been crocheting for 4 years. It gave me something fun to do and it is the best. Not only gen z 😂❤🎉😊😅

  • @ms.ellenlevy5667
    @ms.ellenlevy5667 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I have been crocheting since the late 70s . My neighbor taught me as a kid. Thing with something being counter culture is that these days it’s not counter culture anymore its culture. Tattoos,piercings etc are the norm now but that was not always the case. To be honest , I enjoy it and making things from scratch or doing other crafts and projects. I give away most of them to my friends or donate things to the homeless shelter. Whether crochet is popular or not I will continue to create period…

  • @ricolopez4258
    @ricolopez4258 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I actually don't feel joy when looking at crochet... but crocheting anything can calm or bring me joy.😮🎉❤