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Agree with all your pics. Subscribed. So happy Johnny Depp was vindicated.

FOLLOWED

Yes! Happy to see your channel:))

Totally agree with you about MM. Preaching EMPATHY AND FAMILY while ignoring a father she PRAISED after a stroke 😂Not to mention that I doubt anyone was fearful of two light skinned, freckled individuals about the “darkness” os their offspring’s skin tone.🙄

Good video

Great video wishing you success on your journey.👍 watching from London UK.

As someone who chooses to remain child free until the end of her days, I give the moms & dads out there their 10s. Being a parent is quite the demanding job, one which I do not wish to partake in, because I know exactly what it's like. I am currently the default caretaker for my ailing elderly grandmother, and let me just say, that it is quite similar to having a child. Based off of this experience, I do not want someone, especially a tiny person, dependent on me like that ever again. I love my grandma don't get me wrong, but I've lost much of my life and built up so much stress due to being her caretaker; and when she will eventually pass on, for the remainder of my life I will choose to be selfish with it.

I will say this, once the kid is here, it’s not their fault. I don’t think a kid should be actively berated for existing and frustrating the parents. They literally didn’t ask to be here. I will, however, always support those of us who opt for not having kids because of our very valid concerns and because we KNOW we will be part of the “regret” squad.

The job market is pretty brutal. You need literal fitness to survive. Having a kid destroys your body. It’s way too great a risk to take for someone without a stable home or relationship. The kid becomes a burden, which guarantees poverty for both the parent and child. And even the parent can end up *disabled* after a birth experience because they can’t take time off to fully recover and to get back in shape. Birth is a traumatic experience. Yeah I think I’ll pick surviving.

The only way I can see myself regretting not having kids is, of course, no one feeling obliged to help maintain me in my elder years.

10:42 I mean, children are living bills Not everyone in that socioeconomic status is fit to have kids responsibly. A child that is involuntarily neglected and not invested in due to a lack of resources has severe and serious consequences. It’s no different from rich people who are rich because they overachieve at their jobs but their children are paying the price by being raised by everyone and everything else except their parents. That leads to a breakdown of the nuclear family. Repairing broken adults is brutal. I’d rather do the right and responsible thing and not have the kids that I’ve never even yearned having anyway. Either way, you had a good take. It shows you had a nice upbringing and/or great support along the way.

Ok story 1 reaction: Disgusting bro, I cannot believe you are just sitting here judging. You are literally the problem. I’m so grateful the group exists so people can be honest about the truth of motherhood.

What a closed response. I don’t think you’re actually understanding the opposite perspective, but pretending to. You are verbatim telling people that it’s their fault they dislike their situation and they need to knock it off and make themselves feel happy about it. At least make a good argument for parenthood.

Outside cases of neglect and violence, "good" parenhood is subjective. I think taking your children to Disneyland is bad parenthood, others think the opposite. I think called children "kids" is derogatory. Some believe that buying them pets is child neglect, others believe that a pet is part of the "family".

This was a really good video! I think some people hold these broken concepts of having children etc, wishing to abandon them and regretting them. Are people who had very bad parents, or maybe they had good parents and the only time they experienced other children were in bad situations. I think visible love and feeling loved also may have been a factor in it too. Since we normally have the issue with remembering the worst things instead of the best things. Either way, great video! I wanted to mention all this “child bad” propaganda on the web had me in so much fear of becoming a mother. She’s 19 months old now and I couldn’t imagine my life without her. She’s my best friend, the love of my life, I’d do anything for her. ANYTHING. Loving someone this much I didn’t even know I was capable of. Motherhood can be hard but the good things of motherhood outshine all of those hard times. That why people keep having kids after they have one.

The Cult title made me expect something about ‘gentle parenting’ lol

It’s hard no doubt, no person can prepare you for how hard it can be working and helping the house function safely, that’s just a dad’s perspective-I do less work when I’m at my job! Nothing is better than seeing my daughter do something new or cute, copying us, or looking back on photos; it’s worth the years of no sleep-ins, lack of free time, food spat and thrown round, mess to clean, water on the floor, poo on hands lol ~it is a humbling experience, definitely. Though I don’t think at 38 I will have a second child lol (I did imagine, ignorantly, that when she started walking that she would become autonomous lol

I don’t think loving your kids and regretting them are mutually exclusive. If all you to do was love your kids there would be no foster care. There wouldn’t be people who give birth and feel like failures for not instantly loving their kids like it’s portrayed in pop culture. It’s only recently that many societies are even talking about being child free by choice. We socially pressure people to have kids way more. Yes some people are loud about being child free but there’s a lot more pressure to have kids. I believe at a minimum kids deserve to be wanted by their parents. Regretting not having kids is much less harmful than regretting having them. The latter often leads to consequences for kids not just the parents or potential parents. I want kids. I studied psychology and even with that I won’t be completely prepared . We don’t offer a realistic portrayal of parenting. Society at large doesn’t even understand how kids work. More information and less social pressure to have kids is a net benefit.

I'd have to disagree about the second comment, I do not think that was what they meant. Their point was that people that still haven't decided on having kids need to be able to see another side of that experience too. Birth rates are falling, yes, but how many people are actually childfree by choice? Some have only one kid (so, below the replacement rate), others struggle financially or can't find a good partner etc. And yeah, if we look at all movies and messaging people are surrounded with having kids is still pretty much a societal norm.

"Do you want to pay a lot of tax if it means your childcare is subsidised?" Um, as someone who lives in the UK, yes. Because it works.

I always brace myself for a permanent personality change from those who go through pregnancy, at least. It permanently shrinks your grey matter. I have seen a smaller percentage in my personal life maintain the personality they had before, but unfortunately I know more that change, sometimes become seemingly more foggy and less intelligent (not just during pregnancy or right after, permanently), or even more easily hostile as if they suffered a TBI. It sucks but now when a coworker I loved becomes pregnant I accept they may never be that same person again lol. It reminds me how lobotomies have a higher chance to cause damage/problems, and then a much smaller chance to cause no change whatsoever.

Parenthood is romanticized but if people were mentally prepared for what it actually means and the responsibility that it is, people wouldn't feel so disillusioned. This is a really well produced video! (Love the burp 😂) I notice you're speaking a little slowly, if you're concerned viewers can't keep up, I tried the video at 1.25x speed and it wasn't too fast. So, from my perspective, don't be afraid to speak your natural speed! And if this *is* your natural speed - rock it, don't change. I wish your channel success!

Theyre not horrible people theyre just being honest about something taboo. As long as they dont abuse the children its ok to have feelings of regret and seek support.

Brazil is not great country but it is upper middle income country so better than Haiti. Haiti culture is more like Africa than Latin American countries. also latin American countries do have a some what western culture. Even though I am American the problem with Canada that all in with multiculturism. So once white Canadians become minority the government going have same disfunction as Latin American countries because they going be so diverse and lack social cohesion. Fro Brazil it not rich because it took in too many slaves. So it was like the American south on steroids. So white Brazilians try fix by getting more europeans immigrant to Brazil. As for Mexico it what happen Native Americans on steroids. How ever since Mexico is right next usa some of usa culture is rubbing off on them. Mexico is now richer than Argentina. How ever I feel there gang war and crime problems will likely going on for anther generation. how ever it going get harder to Mexican cartels to recruit with poverty rates in 30s and unemployment rate of 3 percent.

Hello, this is going to be a little long, so please bear with me. :) I am also an immigrant (legal) residing in the USA for several years, originally from Portugal, hence we share the same language. Portugal was the initial colonizer of Brazil, as we know, but I find my views might align with yours on some things. Currently, there are about 2 million Brazilian immigrants in Portugal, some of whom may be undocumented. I am fine with their presence, provided they respect our culture and laws, although their illegal status could be seen as lawbreaking. As a child, I lived in one of Portugal's African ex colonies. After 1974, Portugal granted independence to these colonies. Before that, Portuguese troops were engaged in combat with insurgents in the northern jungles, suffering many casualties. The cessation of conflict was a relief. However, the subsequent takeover by FRELIMO led to a prolonged war, with countless people subjected to forced labor, torture, and execution, largely ignored or unknown to the world. I remember these events from my childhood. My family, along with thousands of other Portuguese, fled and became refugees in our own homeland. FRELIMO launched an intense anti-imperialist propaganda campaign, with "comicios" - public meetings where insurgents, in military attire and armed with megaphones and machine guns, would denounce "imperialist pigs" among other slogans, in various public spaces throughout the cities. Their soldiers would invade homes, brandishing AK47s with bayonets, evict residents, and subject them to humiliation and abuse, sometimes with physical assaults. They emptied the houses from all belongings and promised to return later to occupy them. People's businesses were shut down. My father was repeatedly arrested and sent to labor camps. Once, they took my mother from our home, encircled her, and humiliated her publicly by calling her names and prodding her with their guns in front of my little sister, myself, and our babysitter. FRELIMO froze bank accounts and nationalized everything. Although my parents had money in the bank, they couldn't take it out of the country. We secured a spot on an old Portuguese military ship and sailed from the Indian Ocean to the Atlantic for a month. That's how we escaped with nothing but our lives. After 30 days, we reached Europe with nothing, traumatized, and had to start from scratch. I don't believe any school teaches this, not even in Portugal. Yet, many of us have survived and are still here. We've largely learned to keep our experience to ourselves. Now, over fifty years on, the ex colonies that once flourished are among the poorest nations in the world, grappling with corruption, war, famine, disease, and a lack of education and technical skill. They have a bounty of natural resources and govern themselves, yet their governments are rife with corruption. The aid they receive from foreign countries seldom reaches those in need. Their socialist utopia turned into a never-ending nightmare. I came to the USA because I believed it was the freest country in the world. I wanted freedom, and to feel like I could to speak my mind without fear or punishment, without censure, I wanted to choose the life I desired. Along my journey, I observed that socialist ideology appears beneficial in theory, yet in practice, it often leaves people impoverished in various ways, and lacking belief in themselves, personal sovereignty, and the motivation to aspire for greater achievements. The beautiful thing about the USA, I thought, was that anyone could reach for the stars, it was possible. But in recent times, things have changed. Currently, what is referred to in the USA as democratic is actually not democratic. The democracy of JFK is not the democracy of today. Today, it's an illusion. I observe numerous indications of future events that may not serve the best interests of the American people. I notice elements that evoke the atmosphere preceding the takeover I experienced as a child living in Africa. This is concerning to me, if not frightening. And of course, my opinion, but I felt compelled to share it. Beijinhos.

Many of you voted for what you wanted,you chose to have a state run utopia then you act like you werent reponsible for what you started then you want Canada which is heading the way of Brazil thanks to the pranzer in charge to solve your problems so its time for you to change and let that be a lesson to you when you want the state to keep most of your money in exchange for benefits instead of keeping most of your earnings then you become property.The youth as well as the rebellious spirit of women are responsible for your current situation,it was women who took credit for electing the internstionalist socialist leftist Ignazio Lula Da Silva the first time around in Brazil.Brazil is a democracy not a republic you dont know where youre from and thats a problem,Brazil as well as all of these nations that surround it are replicas of Eastern European socialist states.Do away with the lie of democracy then Brazil will no longer be a country of the tomorow but youre going to need a well informed populous and the right to bear an assault rifle for that.Remember Socrates argued against Democracy because he told you what it leads to at the end,its a lie and for that he was executed.

I don't blame you for wanting to make a better life for yourself. You deserve to be safe and happy just as anyone else should. At this point with all the "illegal immigration" being let in freely by our governments, they should do away with visas. It's all a waste of time and nonsense.

Thx for your sharing your insights, experience, honest with no agenda.

As an Argentine, from a country with a background similar to Brazil’s, I can completely understand and agree with you. However, China is the exception to the general rule about socialism's shortcomings. China has one of the best educational systems, is an exceptionally safe country, boasts a highly active economy, and has one of the leading research and development systems in the world, possibly second only to the U.S. When it comes to socialism I like to have the socialism they have in China instead of the kind of socialism we have in south America, witch only brings us poverty, unsafe, injustice, and sadness.

Tbh, this was recommended to me out of the blue, but I'm pleased to hear basically almost everything that I have been thinking about my home country being said like this, feels like I'm not alone

Thankfully America will not be like Brazil for another 2 years. enjoy the good times, prepare for bad.

How government is supposed to take control over security issues and at the same time attract businesses with low low taxations. Your understanding of things the way they really work ia straight low. Go and take some common sense lessons first.

you spelled immigration wrong.

ᛁ᛫ᛐᚭᚿ'ᛐ᛫ᛓᛆᛚᛁᛆᚠᛆ᛫ᛁᚭᚢ!

This is an excellent explanation of the Brasil situation to outsiders. Some great insights.

I am a teacher. EVERY year, i see people who shouldn't be parents. EVERY year i work with kids who will need therapy their whole life because their "parents" ruined them. And i do not see the worst. In every classroom, statistically, at least 3 kids are/were victims of real awful abuse. On the other hand, i also see "good parents" (they do the job, provide, nurture...) but they are not happy. That's not rare. It's just hidden. After 25 years of seeing that, i can tell you where the problem is. Many, many people either never think about having kid, they have them because "it's the normal thing to do when you progress in life". And MANY others chose to HAVE kids. You shouldn't see kids as something you HAVE. Men especially do not expect to see their lives change much, that's why many married women are single mothers. I came to the conclusion that the only people who should reproduce are those who WANT TO BE PARENTS.

Honestly you’re just wrong about this. It’s great that people are expressing their regret about parenthood. This has always existed, but people have either had to suck that feeling up or even take it out on the kid. The problem with repressing these experiences is because it encourages the larger societal cult of parenthood that leads to regretful parents in the first place. We face constant propaganda and social conditioning all our lives highlighting the necessity of having kids. In some societies this happens in much more authoritarian and coercive ways, but it’s pretty prevalent everywhere. This is especially forced for women. The consequence of this enforced cult of motherhood is people just have kids even if they don’t want them, or they have never thought seriously about the consequences. It’s socially unacceptable to talk about how terrible parenthood can be so we get a totally skewed portrait which leads to more people having kids who shouldn’t have them or don’t end up wanting them. Cutting against this ideology is one part of bettering the situation, and forums like this one help many people make informed decisions before they have kids or at least normalize not mythologizing parenthood and giving people an emotional outlet. People have had these feelings about parenthood forever so it’s better to channel the energy than let it fester. More importantly, we need much more serious state and societal support for child rearing. States propagandize about how you need to have kids but then leave you to suffer without any help. So many of the reasons people regret kids or don’t do right raising their children is a consequence of no social support. You have to rely on a partner who may leave you or other available family members who may not be there for you to help you raise the child. Childcare can be prohibitively expensive. If the state offered free childcare and other social supports to help take the burden off parent(s), we could assuage so many serious crises in all parts of our society. Until we move towards a humane system, we just need to encourage people to see having a child in all its aspects, positive and negative, before having any so we can mitigate the social crisis caused by a broken relationship between the family and society as a whole

This is honestly just so sad and disgusting. This isn’t even uninformed insensitivity, you’re just outright shaming people with less than positive experiences and uplifting voices of misogyny and oppression. When people have tried voicing their concerns with your takes, you’ve responded with nothing put passive aggression; for someone who harps on others to hear out all sides of a story, you certainly don’t want to hear any opinions that don’t reflect yours. This is just so sad.

No hate, but the algorithm took your video some weird places if it landed in my recommended and I promise this isn't a backhanded insult. It's just that I don't share your opinions and as such my recommended section usually features people that share my worldviews. I'm saying this because it means other people with similar beliefs to mine might be recommended your content and be inclined to be less civil. Hunker down if you need to and I sincerely hope you don't get overwhelming harassment from this video. I'm not a parent and therefore I cannot opine on the matter, but I feel as if I should at least warn you that this video might reach an audience that's hostile to your stance on the matter. Stay safe!

i was open to listening to your takes until you unironically platformed matt Walsh.. Not to mention the general dismissal of very real and traumatic circumstance and the severity of mental health-- yikes..

Oh my god. This has got to be bait, right?

Unironically linking to and recommending a Matt Walsh video is all I needed to know nothing of value is present here in this video.

Regret is an emotion. It is not wrong to have the emotion. It's what you do with the emotion, ie actions you take because of it, that may, or may not be, wrong.

I wasn’t quite sure what this video was going to be…then you complimented Matt Walsh. You should really put that kind of red flag up at the front.

what is the problem with people getting things off their chest? they aren’t saying it to their kids and postpartum depression is a real thing. these women are trying and not giving up. and saying all women have kids by choice in america does not take into account the women that are raped forced to marry children not educated just because you didn’t go through it or don’t see it doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. it would be a different story if they said it to their kids face but they didn’t. maybe help people going through this if you hate it so bad just saying don’t be a regretful parents helps no one but YOUR own conscious no one else’s. you’re either speaking from a very privileged mind frame or a jealous mind frame from seeing things happen in another country then coming here to see it happen less and not in everyone’s faces. just because you don’t see it doesn’t mean it’s not there

Chronically online, overtly narcissitc redditors in the comments attacking you in the comments. Keep fighting the good fight, you've earned yourself a sub.

Never mind girl, don’t shame any mother with postpartum depression like wtf is wrong with you

I COMPLETELY AGREE. Talk shit about your kids in therapy not online that’s ridiculous.

Here's my thoughts. talking about regreting children in a safe environment like therapy or in uber-private is begrudgingly tolerable, but don't post it on the internet. That is forever. They (your kids) can read it very easily, and you should be aware as though that outcome is inevitable.

Thank you for the video, great points! People that get it, get it