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I respect tf out of this, not personally vegetarian or vegan, but I really wanna eat better and more plant based food

I made espresso while listening. Really needed to hear those words today thank you so much

Your voice is so lovely. It's such a gentle & calming voice. Sorry that doesnt have much to do with the video but I keep thinking it as I listen.

I relate a lot with this. I went through this last 2 years. I eventually finally got away from my parents for good this summer but it was so hard.

I feel this.

the dairy industry is also horribly cruel and horrible for the environment. we dont need to use these creatures and make products from them. their lives are not worth our satisfaction. i hope more people will be empathetic over time and care more for the other creatures that share our planet than our convenience and oral pleasure

I cut off ties with both my biological father and my siblings' step father permanently, both who were immensely abusive growing up. My childhood timeline is very complicated since I spent time from home to home including several foster homes, but for a period I lived with my half-siblings and their father + step mother. I cut off ties with him to his face almost 10 years ago now and haven't seen him since and it was one of the best choices I ever made. I also haven't seen or spoken to my biological father since I was around 11 which was another one of the best choices I ever made. My family group is extremely small, I have literally only 3 family members I am in contact with and talk to, but those ones that are in my life legitimately care about me. I know it may seem hard, but to everyone else out there who has abusive families, you CAN cut them off, and you will be okay without them. You deserve better. Take care of yourselves.

Hii 🧸🩷🫂

this is so beautiful to see 😍 my 17yo son started T a little over a year ago, and it's been an amazing gift to watch him blossom. so happy for your happiness ❤️ it gives me a lot of hope for his.

I would donate because your independence, insight, resilience and creativity are amazing ❤

I can't imagine your loss ❤ but I'm grateful to listen

The Algo suggested this video to me, and it's the first of yours I've ever seen. And for once, I feel like I need to thank the machine for sending something I really, really needed to hear. But more than that, I want to thank you for sharing your experience, for sharing this reassurance. I'll certainly be looking into your other videos/channels (because I too am a queer person who loves fibercraft!) but I just... really wanted to tell you thank you. This came to me at pretty much the exact time I needed it, and as I sit here typing, it's through tears of validation and a bittersweet acceptance that you're right. You're so, so right. The ball really isn't in our court anymore. And it's okay to let ourselves work towards healing from the guilt of pulling away and no longer trying. Thank you, and bless you (in whatever regard you believe for receiving blessings, whether spiritual, religious, or otherwise.)

i love this about fiber art... like the perfect balance between freedom and restriction. i guess u could apply this to any creative process but the material&mechanical side of knitting/crochet is so strong that it really feels like a dialogue between the yarn and the artist......love ittt

👍

No contact isn't right for me, but I'm at a stage where I'm realizing that it's not my job to make this relationship work. My parents love me very much and they want me around, but they are disappointed in the "choices" I've made. Choices that I'm proud of. I see now that I can never feel accepted around them. It's always going to be messy. My mom is always going to want me to be close like when I was younger, and I'm never going to be able to give her enough of myself, because I can't really be my whole self without making her sad, and that's exhausting. I don't know. I don't plan to step away entirely, but I think I need more space.

I'm so glad the youtube gods have recommended this video to me, this is exactly what I'm going through, and I also come from an immigrant family and have just gotten to the exact decision of taking a break on trying to have a conversation with my mother, because it's just hurtful and exhausting. Great work, and I'm so in love with the tattoos on your hands!

a couple weeks ago after living with my parents again beyond my choice, i ended up having a conversation with my dad. i had always given him the benefit of the doubt with politics, but idk i guess i felt spicy that day. we started ACTUALLY talking about his ACTUAL beliefs - and good god, it was worse than i thought. he legitimately believes that anti-segregation laws should be removed and that companies should have the right to discriminate against people as they see fit... we had a roundabout conversation where he used air quotes around a direct discrimination i experienced in the past that i had just opened up to him about. after i asked "what about people will me who just want to exist?" and he told me we should STAY IN THE CLOSET THEN - so... yeah, i moved out yesterday aaand i feel like this video in my algorithm means something idk, im just realising how much i let him get away with.

As an artist, it is absolutely true! Sometimes I plan a piece from beginning to end, but sometimes my favourite pieces end up being ones where I just go with the flow! Those usually end up being the ones I have the most fun with!

I'm glad you did what you had to with love and care and empathy. I'm also a little envious. I moved out of my house to move in with my boyfriend with as much spite, hate and vitrol that a 22 year old could have, hate that had been brewing since I was, like, 15, if not even younger. I feel like the hate I had for my parents has broken me, so I'm glad that there's still love in you, for your parents, even if they think they know better than you in terms of how to treat you.

i really admire you. you’re truly a work of art ❤️❤️❤️

I think another part of it as well, what makes letting go so hard is that "cutting ties" with your family often feels like you're given two options: either you stay in their lives and keep giving them more chances, or you go completely "fuck them I hate them I have no family I don't need them". and it's always way more complex than that. I feel like we should be able to say that for some of us "found family" does not fill that void, there are some parts of myself that my mother and father will understand about me and relate to me with that no one else in the world will be able to. I feel pressured a lot of the time to be that person who doesn't need/want blood family support and I think that every single person on the planet in some way actually does.

I always forget you’re a transgender woman. My FTM self was like “top surgery?? Ohhhh that’s right some people want breast haha” Good to see you thriving sister!

It is so mesmerising watching how you work, and your speed is incredible!! You can really tell you have been knitting for a long time

I found my tribe

I literally went through the exact same situation of running away from home and living with my now wife’s family. It’s a lot…. especially when even after no contact they continue to reach out or show up announced. That proved to me they will never change nor respect my boundaries as long as I have a relationship with them. Best decision i’ve ever had to make.

Oh my jeez so first being attacked by a thumbnail and then opening to such a lovely, sweet voice I need a second- 😭😭😭

you tried to rekindle the relationship several times, putting your own sanity at risk . thats selfless if anything

i still live with family but my relationship with them has gone downhill after my medical transition. i'm 20 and i feel that the end of our relationship is near and i have come to terms with it

im so lucky to have a loving relationship with my parents. when i first out at 12, it didnt go well, and i had to fight for my identity for like 3-4 years because i needed the relationship and now that they’re like actively making themselves better people, being able to come out as genderfluidflux without any pushback was so nice but it needed them to put in the same effort as i was, for that responsibility of self-improvement to shift over to them if they aren’t willing to love all of you, thats their decision

What you are saying about "maybe if I explain it a different way", is so relatable. I feel like I have always been trying to explain myself, who I am, what I need, in hopes of being understood and cared for. I have also always known (or felt) that one day I would be estranged from my family. I haven't left yet because I can't afford to. I might be able to leave if I had a better job or multiple jobs, but that requires my mental and physical health to be better (which would likely improve with leaving).

Thank you <3 I needed to hear this, really badly, and now I just hope I can pass it along.

Thanks, it helps me, knowing that someone was able to put into words what I couldn't. My situation was different, but what you said sounds so much like what I feel, and it makes me feel so reassured. Hearing someone else calmly explain a feeling so familiar let's me breath and let go of all the resentment I had built up, now knowing for a fact that the pain my family dealt to me wasn't my fault

i haven't yet hit the running away point but i feel as though i am nearing it whenever i have the resource. myself being queer isn't the problem, but many other things are. what you said about "preparing your whole childhood for this" resonated hard. i always knew that one day i won't be able to do it anymore.

i love your voice and i loved hearing you talk! i related to some of what you said and sympathized with other parts, but on the whole really enjoyed the video experience. subbed :]

This video was beautiful! I'm so glad I found you! I listened while I did chores at home. I am a white, queer US citizen who works in a middle school supporting immigrant families. Thank you for sharing your story ❤

I was filling out an apprenticeship application while this video played. I'm 18, fled home too (I was rather forced out, but you know), and I'm homeless, at the moment. I have a lot of freedom, not enough money to enjoy it, but I'm much happier than I was there. My depression cleared up, I'm coming along in my transition, and I can wear what I like! I'm getting housed hopefully soon, hopefully by the end of the month because I want to celebrate my birthday for once & enjoy things. Rent is incredibly cheap for the area since it's a housing project, so I'm looking forward to having an actual address. I'm printing out my deed poll tomorrow & getting friends to sign off on them. I don't want to see my family again. My sisters don't talk to me much, which is a dampener on my mood, but I'll be fine for the most part. I get stares from family members and family friends when I go out, since Somalis are such a judgemental, rude bunch. I used to care, since they'd tell Mum and she'd yell at me again, but now I have no parents to answer to. I have new friends, I can strengthen bonds with old ones, and I don't really miss my parents. They're grown ass people who chose to treat me the way they did. They chose their honour and religion over my life. I choose my life over their god. It's that simple.

i came out at 18 and i’m 39 but im trying to learn to love myself more and appreciate people like you because i have suppressed so much of my own self for the world and people like you encourage us to be more authentic in our presentation and life

I can't believe you're only 22; you're very astute and articulate. I'm glad you reached a point where you you were able to set the relationship down, for however long it may be, because it sounds like it was a great weight you had to drag around.

I haven’t gone through anything like you have, but as a disabled queer adult still living with their parents it’s also a constant struggle to advocate for myself without feeling or coming off as pushy or picky. Without the physical or mental ability to live on my own, I can be grateful that some folks in worse domestic situations than mine have support networks and are able to leave, whether overtly or covertly.

comment for the algorithm <3

Body doubling - you're doing your thing, I'm doing mine; we're just kind of hanging out. :)

❤

Thank you.

Thank you for making this video. I’m not out yet, but I still feel the impending loneliness of being out and seeing other queer people, especially from African families, helps me feel less alone

Wow so grateful to have found your channel. Your a ray of sunshine

Yes!🙌🏾

Thank you for sharing your journey!

Maybe try ACA meetings

Yes to all of this! Recipe for the bread please?? 🤲🏽 looks so good

i’m a 19 year old aroace lesbian who just left a bigoted religion and i’m so scared that this will be the choice I’ll have to make one day , my family love their religion more than me but it’s okay i’ll learn to love myself 🫂 this video is very comforting thank you