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Why Men Don’t Dare to Dress Well: The Fear of Standing Out
Many men feel the desire to dress elegantly, yet hesitate to step out of their comfort zones.
Why is this? In this video, we explore the psychological barriers, social pressures, and personal insecurities that prevent men from embracing a refined style.
Discover how to overcome these obstacles, reclaim your confidence, and dress in a way that truly reflects your personality and values. It’s time to break free from fear and make elegance your own.
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Allure Secretary
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ความคิดเห็น

  • @DutchThriceman
    @DutchThriceman 2 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I'm just a blue colour worker so I just 'dress' in my work clothes, maybe if I was some duke with a castle sure I'd dress like it.

  • @Cthight
    @Cthight 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I pulled the all white style with a white trenchcoat. All people where looking but i only got positive feedback. I have to say it takes a lot of confidence to pull it off because people will look at you. Maybe not everyone will make compliments about the outfit but you need to dont give a f. As long as you feel good in the cloths it looks good but if you dont feel confident enough it will look bad on you.

  • @charmedprince
    @charmedprince 4 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    What a very flawed video. Define elegance. Even menswear has evolved since we last wore tree barks. So you're just going to define male eleganct dressing by way of Western suit and tie? Nonsense. What if elegance for me is a beautiful Japanese Kimono robe made from the finest silk? What if elegance for me is dressing up like a High Elf from Middle-earth?

    • @AllureSecretary
      @AllureSecretary 50 นาทีที่ผ่านมา

      Elegance isn’t confined to a suit and tie, nor does it require tree bark or elf ears. It’s about intentionality, refinement, and confidence, whether in a silk kimono, a tailored blazer, or a mithril tunic. If Middle-earth inspires your style, then by all means, let Rivendell rejoice in your wardrobe! 🤣

  • @hankhill6916
    @hankhill6916 6 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Currently a college student in western PA. I do not particularly dress elegant. Jeans, cowboy or leather boots, Tshirt, flannel, etc. One could call it country. I definitely stick out among the crowd of young adults. Very rarely do I see somebody wearing jeans, and I never see leather boots, and rarely shoes. I notice the trend of sweatpants, hoodies, and lots of socks/sandals. The casual wear of the 80s is now seen as something foreign compared to modern trends.

  • @DamianNowak-d9b
    @DamianNowak-d9b 7 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Men don’t dress well because we don’t want to suffocate from heavy, layered garment in warming environments. Men don’t dress well because we don’t want a large closet. Men don’t dress well because we don’t want to spend time on dressing well. Men don’t dress well because women spend so much time on dressing well that we don’t want to compete with them or act like them. Men don’t dress well because we know that garment quality has disappeared anyway.

  • @kasparovthegodofwar
    @kasparovthegodofwar 8 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Dressing well and looking good as a man is a test to catch your haters

  • @sid86588
    @sid86588 9 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Im happy to live in a European country where this isn't as big of a thing. But i do feel bad for North Americans who seem to face this problem more...

    • @jt1559
      @jt1559 9 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      It's the same in Australia, people dress like crap here.

  • @angusm9419
    @angusm9419 12 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Dress like you're going someplace better later.

  • @mnk9073
    @mnk9073 15 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Dress yourself well, don't dress up as someone else. A nice suit is amazing, a Tommy Shelby-cosplay is cringe. Also, hilarious thing about dressing "masculine" is that you can get ready to get called gay 20 times a day.

  • @OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOq
    @OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOq 16 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    This video only applies and speaks to a very small percentage of men. The majority of men don’t dress for others or care about social norms to the extent they will conform to something they don’t like wearing. There’s a reason we call it a “monkey suit”. Dressing “refined”, “sophisticated ” and “elegant” isn’t interesting to most men. And it’s not even a problem of money, since most people who care about fashion can buy expensive clothing, yet prefer clothing that look casual, even thought it can cost equally or even more than a tailored suit. PS: Masculinity and being masculine is how men (as a majority) behave. It’s not what they wear, nor is it bound to tradition.

  • @rain-co7ig
    @rain-co7ig 16 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I dress well mainly I wear a leather jacket and grey jeans or blue jeans a brown leather belt and brown steel toe boots and a tank top or graphic t or just a white tee and i also wear a Wrangler jacket thats kinda brownish with a grey hood

  • @Official_jameslby
    @Official_jameslby 16 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    What if you want to be a spook

  • @-Ryan_Gasoline-
    @-Ryan_Gasoline- 20 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    This is a topic I didn't know was being tackled by other people. I always wear a simple pair of sturdy pants in a dark greenish brown color and a few others with different dark colors, with a pair of black work/military boots. And a dark prussian-blue knitted long-sleeve shirt, almost like a sweater, I don't really know the difference between the two, and another one in dark olive with the same style. With a dark gray water-proof cotton trench coat as a jacket (gets wet and cold where I live). Not just that, my hair is always just in a simple left-side parting that's shorter on the sides, you know the type. When people see me in such a style it makes me feel out of place, especially with everyone wearing style-less clothes that are only stupidly expensive because they're branded by some corporation, and their hair in an NPC ass broccoli cut with a fade, calling me an NPC and pushing me to get the same cut and same NPC style. And when I say no, I like what I am, they'll call me a try-hard.

  • @PiethagorasTearem
    @PiethagorasTearem 20 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I wanna dress like the guy in bloodborne tho

  • @PierfrancoMinsenti
    @PierfrancoMinsenti 22 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Is this the fashion theory of a MAGA supporter? The boring stress on expressing traditional masculinity and the grotesque examples of “fluid fashion” leave no doubt.

  • @carlsbad9000
    @carlsbad9000 วันที่ผ่านมา

    My rebellion has adopted this cause. It is not a lingering thought of mine, ever, to dim myself down but I also benefit from exquisite taste so 😅

  • @lordexcellent5610
    @lordexcellent5610 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Today’s casual clothing makes you look like you don’t care about the way you dress even if you do.

  • @Z.94pe_Japanese_Phalerist
    @Z.94pe_Japanese_Phalerist วันที่ผ่านมา

    Ironically, casual fashion, which began as a rebellion against the dominant adult society, has become so dominant that it excludes other fashions. What we truly want is a world where each person is free to choose and no fashion is dominant.

  • @segovax2852
    @segovax2852 วันที่ผ่านมา

    At the job I work. Dressing more formal is required. I honestly started to feel more confident and and better about myself. Self improvement, even with little things can really help self confidence and overall happiness.

  • @mRahman92
    @mRahman92 วันที่ผ่านมา

    14:00 the guy in the stock footage had his pants button undone lol Great video man! It a;; started with me with trench coats other long coats. Suspenders are overdue for a comeback and are much more comfortable than belts!

  • @douglasstrother6584
    @douglasstrother6584 วันที่ผ่านมา

    A kilt is always an attention getter!

  • @paleriderpublishing451
    @paleriderpublishing451 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I typically dress well I don’t care if I stand out haters gonna hate no matter what you do

  • @rex-rant4322
    @rex-rant4322 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Usually the way I feel like dressing, I'll throw stuff together and feel good about myself and go about my day. That's about it.

  • @lovalona7389
    @lovalona7389 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Thats so true, haha

  • @touhidislamemon5178
    @touhidislamemon5178 วันที่ผ่านมา

    tell me the name of this voice AI ❤ It's really great.

  • @michaelle8384
    @michaelle8384 วันที่ผ่านมา

    My daughter buy a pair of shoes for $50.00 she walk about 5 minute the shoes fall apart right at the mall I buy an Italian shoes for $400.back in 89 I still wear it 2024 nice when you buy cheap stuff they don’t last do you research before you buy bdxy best quality

  • @michaelle8384
    @michaelle8384 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Bdxy the best by Luke evans good quality my husband love love them

  • @MultiWatcher1000
    @MultiWatcher1000 วันที่ผ่านมา

    You just got a new subscriber.

  • @MultiWatcher1000
    @MultiWatcher1000 วันที่ผ่านมา

    13:15 Very good tip. This is also the way I did it.

  • @dimitriosmoreis2933
    @dimitriosmoreis2933 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I'm not. Too late to be scared.

  • @lyontanisawesome1258
    @lyontanisawesome1258 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Well said! 🥹

  • @mr.aesthetic272
    @mr.aesthetic272 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    China

  • @Carl-x8y3c
    @Carl-x8y3c 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Im in my sixties. I dress for comfort now , more than style. But some men are colour shy with dress. And i think that is one reason why men dont like dressing up. I know a guy and he put on a pink shirt that he bought one day , and his daughter remarked to him , dad you are wearing a pink shirt , have you turned gay.

  • @smackroscoe
    @smackroscoe 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    It’s always better to look good than to feel good. Always err on the side of MARVELOUS!!

  • @user-my6ss4mz4l
    @user-my6ss4mz4l 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Hmmm...maybe because we live in a society where wearing a suit isn't required by most of our jobs?

  • @godo_denims
    @godo_denims 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I’m scared of the prices

  • @TomášJedno-p2f
    @TomášJedno-p2f 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    People are drawn to newer styles because they're often more comfortable and practical. It's easy to get caught up in the "newer is better" mindset, but ultimately, wear what you feel good in. Don't force yourself into a "classic" style just to appear cool. Be yourself and express your own unique style!

  • @TheMrMRsmoke
    @TheMrMRsmoke 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Lol this is just propaganda so shop can sell more suits

  • @thiago2000.mp4
    @thiago2000.mp4 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I love being left out by using a little bit of updressing. While everyone is wearing running shoes and nike shirts, im wearing matching belt and shoes, a good pair of jeans and a nice tucked in shirt, casual but updressed for others

  • @CS_1989
    @CS_1989 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I would argue it's more about the ratio between $$$ & status. if I had the $$$ I would def like to have a couple tailor made suits but then I don't have nowhere 2 go vice versa if I had the status unless I'm going out for business or high profile events, imma be in sweat pants & hoodie going 2 grocery store #TheStruggle on top of the fact that allot of men R overweight & outta shape which makes dressing elegant even more uncomfortable

  • @sbentsen2714
    @sbentsen2714 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    As I'm thinking about it now, it's weird how our culture has shifted to if I go to Starbucks to work on my computer or walking around our local town, people would probably ask if I were wearing a suit or a blazer, what's the occasion? Like an hour day currently we need a special occasion to dress up more formally. If theres no occasion just wear whatever. Even wearing pajamas is acceptable sometimes now in public, its crazy! Lol idk if thats the norm but im not teaching my kids to look that way in public.

  • @andybatista412
    @andybatista412 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Well I drive a semi truck for a living and I do have a desire to dress elegant so I guess I'll be on my way to doing my job in a tailored suit (I'm not joking)

  • @agabsnl3607
    @agabsnl3607 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Elegantly stand out today by wearing leather jacket+white shirt, leather belt, blackjeans+biker leather shoe ALL EYES WAS ON ME✨ I do wear leather when riding wear formal while driving

  • @JoshThewhiteDad
    @JoshThewhiteDad 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Caring what other people think of you’re outfit is one of the most unmasculine things lol Just put that shit on and rock it If you feel insecure in an outfit it’s probably because it ether doesn’t fit right, doesn’t match the occasion, or you’re over weight/ out of shape,

  • @devilslayerthesaintofkille1317
    @devilslayerthesaintofkille1317 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    It's not just about how men dress, society wants men to set the bar lower for everything.

  • @DJOttmar
    @DJOttmar 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    If opposition (or just attention) from people you don't even engage with is something that inhibits you, you are no man. You are a woman. If you don't take financial advice from a person, why would you give a damn what they think about you in general? What alphabet people in rags with pink hair and metal in their faces think about what you look like just shouldn't be a concern...

  • @TheElectricCheeseProductions22
    @TheElectricCheeseProductions22 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I disagree, people just don't give a fuck and don't think or they just wanna wear the low brow "street wear" their braindead peers do (young people)

    • @OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOq
      @OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOq 16 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      Exactly! Today there is more fashion diversity than ever before. Most people don’t care about fitting-in as men in the past did aka back when everyone wore suits like this guy is trying to push. It has nothing to do with insecurity why that outfit is outdated outside of very specific traditional reason to wear it. Then he tries to gate keep masculinity by attaching that label to a certain appearance. What a cornball.

  • @Mickyfrench65
    @Mickyfrench65 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I wear suits etc, bespoke items, and I don't care what anyone says .... I once had a female say "huh, can tell who you voted for" looked me up and down and smirked while her friend called me a loser .... I was wearing a suit, white shirt, black tie and black shoes with tie pin etc.. they walked off with a mock laugh, they were dressed in I can only describe as miss matched second hand looking rags and training shoes, they smelled too, of B.O. and their hair looked dirty.... Here in the UK if you don't "fit in" you are targeted, for mocking and smirking... I immediately went to my tailor and ordered a new jacket ... And went home to shower. Youth culture here is non existent, it's ALL trackeis (track suit bottoms, tight, worn short) huge expensive but cheaply made trainers (Nike Adidas etc) and an ill fitting one size fits all black puffa jacket worn with the hood up to look "gangsta" or a black hoodie, (that isn't even "puffa" and incredibly poor quality) they ALL dress exactly the same...grown men aren't much different, they are generally told what to wear by their partners or peers ... I refuse to do this, I was "dressed" by my ex, and I was miserable, I fell into that mould of being told what to wear to suit her (for her peers, after all a man is just another possession to these females to show her status and bleed dry, ok I'm generalising, but prove me wrong...) as soon as I divorced her I immediately ordered a suit, threw all my old clothes in a bag and donated them to charity, I completely filled my wardrobe with fine wool sweaters, Italian knits, tailored trousers, jackets and suits, and bespoke shirts, quality shoes and underwear, (no supermarket 5 pack of boxers) and socks, accessories like a decent quality gents umbrella, etc, I bought hand made coats, and I refuse to wear trainers except for working out (she saw weeks later and her face dropped, it was wonderful)... At home I'm in men's lounge trousers and t shirt, but I'd sooner die than be seen out in them ... I get looks, comments etc ranging from "you look smart? Going some special?" to "uhg who does he think he is?" And "saddo" from very scruffy dirty looking miserable people who are only happy if EVERYONE is miserable too, again generalising, but the resentment is often palpable from both sexes, my gay friends also lament the day men stopped looking like men, not all homosexual men are ultra feminine and they personally despise the "straight gay men" as they described them to me, they too dress classy and refined, but they'll tell you it's rare in their community too... I dated a female who told me I tried too hard apparently by wearing trousers and not jeans and I actually shaved!! I walked out. . Fk that, I don't want my best dressed day to be when I'm lying in my coffin and I certainly won't be dictated to for any reason esp personal choices like clothing.. You are what you wear. Smart, clean, masculine, stoic, capable, fresh, or scruffy homeless looking drop out who obviously doesn't wash in the morning before going to the local shop for their can of monster, critical I know...but I fight back.... It IS a choice. You just have to step out of the hive mindset. Sadly until the fat cats sat behind the desks tell them what to wear it'll never change, I truly believe we have seen the last of the masculine, clean showered well dressed stylist gentleman.

  • @SteveW67
    @SteveW67 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Reading the comments I like the thought "dressing up is the new non-conforming" at 68 years old I've been too guilty of blending in to casual t-shirt, jeans, overshirts etc. Time for change I think. Many thanks for this video.

    • @AllureSecretary
      @AllureSecretary 2 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Thank you for your kind words! It’s never too late to embrace elegance. Your perspective adds so much depth to this conversation. Wishing you all the best on this stylish new journey!