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Why Men Don’t Dare to Dress Well: The Fear of Standing Out
Many men feel the desire to dress elegantly, yet hesitate to step out of their comfort zones.
Why is this? In this video, we explore the psychological barriers, social pressures, and personal insecurities that prevent men from embracing a refined style.
Discover how to overcome these obstacles, reclaim your confidence, and dress in a way that truly reflects your personality and values. It’s time to break free from fear and make elegance your own.
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Allure Secretary
มุมมอง: 19 652

วีดีโอ

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ความคิดเห็น

  • @lyontanisawesome1258
    @lyontanisawesome1258 22 นาทีที่ผ่านมา

    Well said! 🥹

  • @mr.aesthetic272
    @mr.aesthetic272 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    China

  • @Carl-x8y3c
    @Carl-x8y3c ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Im in my sixties. I dress for comfort now , more than style. But some men are colour shy with dress. And i think that is one reason why men dont like dressing up. I know a guy and he put on a pink shirt that he bought one day , and his daughter remarked to him , dad you are wearing a pink shirt , have you turned gay.

  • @smackroscoe
    @smackroscoe 2 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    It’s always better to look good than to feel good. Always err on the side of MARVELOUS!!

  • @user-my6ss4mz4l
    @user-my6ss4mz4l 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Hmmm...maybe because we live in a society where wearing a suit isn't required by most of our jobs?

  • @godo_denims
    @godo_denims 6 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I’m scared of the prices

  • @TomášJedno-p2f
    @TomášJedno-p2f 8 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    People are drawn to newer styles because they're often more comfortable and practical. It's easy to get caught up in the "newer is better" mindset, but ultimately, wear what you feel good in. Don't force yourself into a "classic" style just to appear cool. Be yourself and express your own unique style!

  • @TheMrMRsmoke
    @TheMrMRsmoke 8 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Lol this is just propaganda so shop can sell more suits

  • @thiago2000.mp4
    @thiago2000.mp4 9 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I love being left out by using a little bit of updressing. While everyone is wearing running shoes and nike shirts, im wearing matching belt and shoes, a good pair of jeans and a nice tucked in shirt, casual but updressed for others

  • @CS_1989
    @CS_1989 12 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I would argue it's more about the ratio between $$$ & status. if I had the $$$ I would def like to have a couple tailor made suits but then I don't have nowhere 2 go vice versa if I had the status unless I'm going out for business or high profile events, imma be in sweat pants & hoodie going 2 grocery store #TheStruggle on top of the fact that allot of men R overweight & outta shape which makes dressing elegant even more uncomfortable

  • @sbentsen2714
    @sbentsen2714 13 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    As I'm thinking about it now, it's weird how our culture has shifted to if I go to Starbucks to work on my computer or walking around our local town, people would probably ask if I were wearing a suit or a blazer, what's the occasion? Like an hour day currently we need a special occasion to dress up more formally. If theres no occasion just wear whatever. Even wearing pajamas is acceptable sometimes now in public, its crazy! Lol idk if thats the norm but im not teaching my kids to look that way in public.

  • @andybatista412
    @andybatista412 13 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Well I drive a semi truck for a living and I do have a desire to dress elegant so I guess I'll be on my way to doing my job in a tailored suit (I'm not joking)

  • @agabsnl3607
    @agabsnl3607 14 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Elegantly stand out today by wearing leather jacket+white shirt, leather belt, blackjeans+biker leather shoe ALL EYES WAS ON ME✨ I do wear leather when riding wear formal while driving

  • @JoshThewhiteDad
    @JoshThewhiteDad 14 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Caring what other people think of you’re outfit is one of the most unmasculine things lol Just put that shit on and rock it If you feel insecure in an outfit it’s probably because it ether doesn’t fit right, doesn’t match the occasion, or you’re over weight/ out of shape,

  • @devilslayerthesaintofkille1317
    @devilslayerthesaintofkille1317 18 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    It's not just about how men dress, society wants men to set the bar lower for everything.

  • @DJOttmar
    @DJOttmar 18 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    If opposition (or just attention) from people you don't even engage with is something that inhibits you, you are no man. You are a woman. If you don't take financial advice from a person, why would you give a damn what they think about you in general? What alphabet people in rags with pink hair and metal in their faces think about what you look like just shouldn't be a concern...

  • @TheElectricCheeseProductions22
    @TheElectricCheeseProductions22 19 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I disagree, people just don't give a fuck and don't think or they just wanna wear the low brow "street wear" their braindead peers do (young people)

  • @Mickyfrench65
    @Mickyfrench65 19 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    I wear suits etc, bespoke items, and I don't care what anyone says .... I once had a female say "huh, can tell who you voted for" looked me up and down and smirked while her friend called me a loser .... I was wearing a suit, white shirt, black tie and black shoes with tie pin etc.. they walked off with a mock laugh, they were dressed in I can only describe as miss matched second hand looking rags and training shoes, they smelled too, of B.O. and their hair looked dirty.... Here in the UK if you don't "fit in" you are targeted, for mocking and smirking... I immediately went to my tailor and ordered a new jacket ... And went home to shower. Youth culture here is non existent, it's ALL trackeis (track suit bottoms, tight, worn short) huge expensive but cheaply made trainers (Nike Adidas etc) and an ill fitting one size fits all black puffa jacket worn with the hood up to look "gangsta" or a black hoodie, (that isn't even "puffa" and incredibly poor quality) they ALL dress exactly the same...grown men aren't much different, they are generally told what to wear by their partners or peers ... I refuse to do this, I was "dressed" by my ex, and I was miserable, I fell into that mould of being told what to wear to suit her (for her peers, after all a man is just another possession to these females to show her status and bleed dry, ok I'm generalising, but prove me wrong...) as soon as I divorced her I immediately ordered a suit, threw all my old clothes in a bag and donated them to charity, I completely filled my wardrobe with fine wool sweaters, Italian knits, tailored trousers, jackets and suits, and bespoke shirts, quality shoes and underwear, (no supermarket 5 pack of boxers) and socks, accessories like a decent quality gents umbrella, etc, I bought hand made coats, and I refuse to wear trainers except for working out (she saw weeks later and her face dropped, it was wonderful)... At home I'm in men's lounge trousers and t shirt, but I'd sooner die than be seen out in them ... I get looks, comments etc ranging from "you look smart? Going some special?" to "uhg who does he think he is?" And "saddo" from very scruffy dirty looking miserable people who are only happy if EVERYONE is miserable too, again generalising, but the resentment is often palpable from both sexes, my gay friends also lament the day men stopped looking like men, not all homosexual men are ultra feminine and they personally despise the "straight gay men" as they described them to me, they too dress classy and refined, but they'll tell you it's rare in their community too... I dated a female who told me I tried too hard apparently by wearing trousers and not jeans and I actually shaved!! I walked out. . Fk that, I don't want my best dressed day to be when I'm lying in my coffin and I certainly won't be dictated to for any reason esp personal choices like clothing.. You are what you wear. Smart, clean, masculine, stoic, capable, fresh, or scruffy homeless looking drop out who obviously doesn't wash in the morning before going to the local shop for their can of monster, critical I know...but I fight back.... It IS a choice. You just have to step out of the hive mindset. Sadly until the fat cats sat behind the desks tell them what to wear it'll never change, I truly believe we have seen the last of the masculine, clean showered well dressed stylist gentleman.

  • @SteveW67
    @SteveW67 21 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    Reading the comments I like the thought "dressing up is the new non-conforming" at 68 years old I've been too guilty of blending in to casual t-shirt, jeans, overshirts etc. Time for change I think. Many thanks for this video.

    • @AllureSecretary
      @AllureSecretary 21 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      Thank you for your kind words! It’s never too late to embrace elegance. Your perspective adds so much depth to this conversation. Wishing you all the best on this stylish new journey!

  • @Parcother
    @Parcother 23 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    even saitama said when he first wear his hero suit. he is embarrass at first but everyday he wears he will get used to it.

  • @loganyang1207
    @loganyang1207 23 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

    To hell with society’s “norm” 😂😂😂

  • @dormantrabbits
    @dormantrabbits วันที่ผ่านมา

    I broke the unwritten casual dress code at work once and won't do it again. Nothing but negative attention from people all day.

    • @moorshound3243
      @moorshound3243 10 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      That's because they were jealous

  • @Redasurc
    @Redasurc วันที่ผ่านมา

    Ok to be fair these guys look like they’re from 1910 not dressing elegantly

    • @moorshound3243
      @moorshound3243 10 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      Sorry what?

  • @richr0b375
    @richr0b375 วันที่ผ่านมา

    bro the gays are not hating on your suit 😭

    • @MichaelHeinen-qk6gg
      @MichaelHeinen-qk6gg 3 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      So you know your "own kind" 😏

  • @holmbergaudio
    @holmbergaudio วันที่ผ่านมา

    With coddling of criminals, and going bankrupt from a self defense case in court, men dress like homeless. It's the educated liberal way of society.

  • @THETURKISHKEBAB1
    @THETURKISHKEBAB1 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Its more like tryna not get mugged in the uk

    • @moorshound3243
      @moorshound3243 10 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      I'm too old to be getting mugged

  • @DarkCloudGather
    @DarkCloudGather วันที่ผ่านมา

    Good list.

  • @samaelauneor
    @samaelauneor วันที่ผ่านมา

    I'm 35 and decided to level up my clothing this year. People mock me saying it's mid-age crisis, but my wife's and other women looks says otherwise.

  • @locks4
    @locks4 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I have personal issues about when men go out with their women to important gatherings and wear street wear while she is dressed in a dress and heels..it urks me

  • @EttoreSAAB900
    @EttoreSAAB900 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Me and my buddy are used to dress well since the first years of high school. Recently I got a job as a warehouse/sales-office worker and always wear a shirt, tailored trousers and oxford shoes,which is basically as my manager dresses. The other day the owner's son came in and pointed out the way I was dressed and told me to put on jeans and "twenty-year-old shoes". The way I took it is that he feels so insecure that he wants me to dress down, and that's why I'll keep dressing well.

  • @voornaamachternaam5745
    @voornaamachternaam5745 วันที่ผ่านมา

    AS A BLACKMAN ITS EVEN WORSE ,YOU SUPPOSE TO WEAR HIPHOP CLOTHING !

    • @moorshound3243
      @moorshound3243 10 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      Have you not seen ask oaky?

  • @viktorkabrt5513
    @viktorkabrt5513 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I started to dress well everywhere, especially in my working place, many people judge me or even called me on that: "I'm overdress and asked me if I'm going somewhere - like wedding" and btw I'm working in office, so this thing should be normal, but it's not, even our high manager don't dress that well, in my eyes, most of the times I overshadow him with my clothes. Most of my colleagues wear simple clothes, nothing to stand out. After some time, most of my colleagues get used to my new style, but they will always judge you. For all guys, that want to wear something better, it's hard from the beginning, but you will get used to it and after some time, you will never want to wear those "simple" clothes again.

    • @McCarthy1776
      @McCarthy1776 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Because your value as a worker is in how well you do your job not in how you dress. Y'all are being shallow and acting like women obsessing over fashion

    • @AllureSecretary
      @AllureSecretary วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@McCarthy1776 I think you may have misunderstood the idea. It’s not about an obsession with fashion. In fact, it’s not about fashion at all. It’s about timeless masculine elegance, a concept that transcends trends and fleeting styles.

    • @Mickyfrench65
      @Mickyfrench65 19 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      ​@@AllureSecretarythere's always one.... Haters are everywhere.

    • @viktorkabrt5513
      @viktorkabrt5513 15 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      @@McCarthy1776 Dressing well will give you respect and that could you rlly help you with job it self, I can say this same about you, you are obssed with gym, it's clear from your picture, good body will not open you all the doors that you need, you have to be complex person and dressing nice is also good benefit.

  • @locks4
    @locks4 วันที่ผ่านมา

    We havevto make the distinction between men and boys. Men dress how they want. Boys dress to fit in and for validation.

    • @McCarthy1776
      @McCarthy1776 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Actually all humans except for one's with disorders like Autism for example, naturally conform to a culture. Its what holds society together. You haven't noticed the ones who always dress completely different and wear fedoras and all are always very weird socially awkward kids, usually overweight or underweight, acne, live at home until 30...

    • @locks4
      @locks4 วันที่ผ่านมา

      ​@@McCarthy1776understood, but there does come a point as to where conforming suppresses an individual

  • @McCarthy1776
    @McCarthy1776 วันที่ผ่านมา

    If you're larping as a peaky blinder it doesn't make you "masculine" it doesn't make you an "alpha" or a "sigma" it just makes you an autistic weirdo. This isnt going to get you laid, get you paid or improve your health, fitness or education. You're pretending to be a self help masculinity channel but you're childish. I'm betting you're no older than early 20s, probably not very wealthy, or born into wealth, and probably can't even bench 225. I highly doubt you're anyone with any credibility to be preaching personal growth and masculinity.

  • @ponderbot34
    @ponderbot34 วันที่ผ่านมา

    In a nutshell: We're afraid of being labeled a "dandy man" if you know what i mean

  • @McCarthy1776
    @McCarthy1776 วันที่ผ่านมา

    You shouldn't dress to make yourself happy. You dress to whatever society perceives as the right way to dress, that's how you dress for success. Dressing up to feel good about yourself is both feminine and childish. And being edgy and trying to dress cool, only makes people think you're a weirdo. Its always the autistic virgins doing this shit. Unless youre in a role where dressing up everyday is the norm then doing it just makes you weird. And it's a waste of time, money and effort. Most jobs have a dress code and unless you have some corporate office job it usually doesn't involve a suit, you can't do much labor in a suit, you can't workout in a suit, wearing a suit only slows you down, restricts your movement, takes more time to put on, takes more time to maintain. It's irrational

  • @Taccar
    @Taccar วันที่ผ่านมา

    Moste men are too fat, thats it

  • @McCarthy1776
    @McCarthy1776 วันที่ผ่านมา

    You have to somewhat conform to social norms or everyone will just think you're autistic. And you probably are if you're going around formally dressed up in casual life, especially if you're rocking the fedora and all. Also it's completely irrational to blow thousands of dollars on fitted suits to wear every day unless your job requires it. Most people don't have the money for that. And its difficult to work in a suit, or to do anything active. There's no logical or practical reason to do this. Focus on actual self improvement, not dressing up just to make people think you're someone you're not. No successful businessman would tell you to blow thousand of dollars on suits unless you're already rich.

  • @DavidBerger-g2h
    @DavidBerger-g2h วันที่ผ่านมา

    You whats works having a Group dressing similair makes everything wearable.

  • @chunkymilk
    @chunkymilk วันที่ผ่านมา

    define ‘dress well’.

  • @ifcinvestor569
    @ifcinvestor569 วันที่ผ่านมา

    One who thinks for himself is an Alpha Male!

    • @McCarthy1776
      @McCarthy1776 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Thats not what alpha male means

  • @JamesW7723
    @JamesW7723 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I don’t think it’s mostly about standing out and looking different from the rest of the crowd. I think it’s because many men are overweight and don’t think they would look good in a tailored outfit.

    • @McCarthy1776
      @McCarthy1776 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Its because most men can afford to blow thousands of dollars on suits. You guys are all very young aren't you? Its also not a cultural norm. Its always been weird to dress like the previous century. Formal clothing is for formal occasions. It makes no sense to dress up on a regular day. It's just LARPing. Thats why only autistic kids do it

  • @RealRed03
    @RealRed03 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I would say 99% of the reason for casual clothes is convenience and practicality. Especially for someone who is quite active. It’s hard to beat jeans and boots for most outdoor situations. I prefer clothes I can rely on and not worry about getting dirty or damaged. While it’s nice to dress up for occasions, I don’t think there is anything masculine about being overly fussy with clothing, especially if your clothing prevents you from wanting to get your hands dirty.

    • @McCarthy1776
      @McCarthy1776 วันที่ผ่านมา

      These kids aren't thinking rationally. They're young boys who watched Peaky Blinders and thought it was cool, and they see wealthy business men wearing suits and having women, nice cars, respect etc. And they are virgins who everyone thinks are weird. Then they start wearing suits and fedoras in casual environments and wonder why everyone thinks they're even more weird after that. So then they make videos like this saying society is wrong and that they are actually more masculine and superior 😂. Notice these people never show their face or use their real voice in these videos. Cause they're insecure, they're nobodies who have this artificial self perceptive persona that copies Thomas Shelby but in real life they are nothing like that

    • @moorshound3243
      @moorshound3243 10 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      While your hands are dirty with mud and engine oil the well dressed gentleman's hands are dirty because they are up your wife's skirt. Food for thought?

  • @Gaphalor
    @Gaphalor วันที่ผ่านมา

    I am 28 and since I joined a historic student fraternity I dont wear T-Shirts and Jeans and casual stuff like this anymore (just in my own 4 rooms when I chill). I exclusively wear anything from a shirt and chino and up to full suite, for winter a long coat and leather mittens. Always clean shaven and fresh Hair. At first you feel overdressed, but you will get used to it. It also opens many doors I feel and I've got many compliments from women. But you need to know a bit about mens wear, you cannot combine just anything, there are certain rules, and I feel most people even in business space make a lot of terrible choices regarding this. Andone more thing: Its not that expensive actually, when I started out I just needed to know my sizes and I started by buying used stuff for cheap money. Most people use their suits one or two times and then sell them for cheap.

  • @patrickpregiato1794
    @patrickpregiato1794 วันที่ผ่านมา

    You mean elegantly!

  • @kisstheforest2463
    @kisstheforest2463 วันที่ผ่านมา

    A friend of mine worked in a small german tech company. He is quite small (around 5ft 3) but he chose to wear nice boots and a 3 piece suit) He did this for a few weeks until his Boss came to him (his boss is wearing casual clothes) and told him to stop wearing these clothes cause they make him (The Boss) look bad.

    • @McCarthy1776
      @McCarthy1776 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Its weird, it's irrational, it's pointless. How does wearing a 3 piece suit objectively improve your productivity, or masculinity? It doesn't. If you have to rely on expensive clothing to feel secure about your masculinity then that's a problem.

    • @diegogarciamartin940
      @diegogarciamartin940 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@McCarthy1776 Isn't the boss being intimidated or insecure about some one else wearing a suit even worse? Wearing a suit doesn't make you better, but if you like the aesthetics why not? Wearing casual clothes "to not appear too serious" or "to show you are not trying too hard" (instead of because you like them) is also wrong

    • @ilovefreeski
      @ilovefreeski วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@McCarthy1776 facts

    • @caseygrow5951
      @caseygrow5951 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@McCarthy1776 that went well over your head. The point was that dressing well made the boss feel insecure. The real question should be why was he threatened and insecure?

    • @ionpopescu3167
      @ionpopescu3167 19 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      @@caseygrow5951 Because he looks like an underling to this guy if we judge by dress code.

  • @attroenergizer8115
    @attroenergizer8115 วันที่ผ่านมา

    i love dressing as a drug dillah nobody wants to mess with me

  • @cicero275
    @cicero275 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Sheeople 😂

  • @cicero275
    @cicero275 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Some people are way too worried about what others opinions and crave for attention. 😊

  • @istp1967
    @istp1967 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Since turning 50, I have raised the bar in my daily clothing. I got mocked for a bit. But I just smiled and said, "I want to dress my age, like a Man not a schoolboy". That was enough, and they backed off.

    • @sbentsen2714
      @sbentsen2714 13 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      Whoa, nice 👍🏼 yup