Author Jen Waite Tells Megyn Kelly How Her ‘Sociopath’ Husband Cheated On Her | Megyn Kelly TODAY

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 มิ.ย. 2018
  • On a special episode of Megyn Kelly TODAY focusing on cheating, Megyn welcomes Jen Waite, author of “A Beautiful, Terrible Thing,” who opens up about how she discovered that her husband, the father of her newborn child, was cheating on her with multiple women. Psychologist Ramani Durvasula calls it a “textbook” case of sociopathic behavior.
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    Author Jen Waite Tells Megyn Kelly How Her ‘Sociopath’ Husband Cheated On Her | Megyn Kelly TODAY

ความคิดเห็น • 1K

  • @RM-pl5po
    @RM-pl5po 6 ปีที่แล้ว +387

    Lucky for her she had parents with the ability to take her in with her child. Many do not have that. That is a luxury for many.

    • @launabanauna8958
      @launabanauna8958 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      R M I wish I had some help from family, but my parents are gone now. It certainly would have been a luxury to have them at this time.

    • @socialmedia1276
      @socialmedia1276 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I agree.

    • @VG-qu3vb
      @VG-qu3vb 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      If not her parents, it would be the government.

    • @Francoise888
      @Francoise888 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      R M so true. I would have left many years sooner had I had that.

    • @Stardust414
      @Stardust414 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@VG-qu3vb IDK what country you're in but I endured nearly a decade of abuse bc I had nowhere else to go-no family to take me in & no government assistance available to me.
      1) I had no children
      2) I was penniless
      I was fully dependent on my husband financially & bc I was on his taxes as his spouse, in eyes of my Gov, I was just as wealthy as he
      3) I had 3 dogs
      My husband's puppy who clung to me bc he mistreated him (which I put a stop to) & my dogs that were Seniors bc I'd had them long before my marriage.
      Those are 3 of the largest obstacles I encountered. Typically, you'd devise a plan to work & save for an exit strategy but after years of abuse I became very sick with an autoimmune illness that prevented me from working. I'm still recovering my health to this day. I'm not in a great situation (yet) but I do have my dogs & my life plus I have Faith. If the Government is handing out help, I sure missed out!!!

  • @nickinurse6433
    @nickinurse6433 6 ปีที่แล้ว +854

    His face needs to be shown to warn other woman.

    • @marinak2266
      @marinak2266 6 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      It's on google.

    • @cryzmyth
      @cryzmyth 6 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      cheater Carlos Beltran's smiling face looks like he can't be trusted.

    • @anniewilliams9317
      @anniewilliams9317 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      It's good that she got on TV because the woman he is with or maybe protential women can see what he did to her and how pretty she is and did not deserve this

    • @deborahwiley-patel5072
      @deborahwiley-patel5072 5 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @@anniewilliams9317 No woman or man, pretty or not pretty, do not deserve this.

    • @TheRenegadeStarr
      @TheRenegadeStarr 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      AGREED

  • @TeenaNikole
    @TeenaNikole 4 ปีที่แล้ว +93

    I was with a sociopath for 3 years and when it all ended I lost the will to continue. It was so confusing to me what I did to deserve that. He “love bombed” me and chased after me for years, when he finally got me, slowly and slowly he started treating me worse and I started to catch him in more and more lies. I caught him cheating on me and that was what ended the relationship. I’m now happily married to my wonderful husband and we share a beautiful life together and our darling son. Life is great.

    • @lilacsunshine3044
      @lilacsunshine3044 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I have a good man in my life.But i dont get it why they go after some one with such zeal then treat them like garbage?

    • @lanyg.6492
      @lanyg.6492 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Love a good ending!!❤

  • @debbievillalta4397
    @debbievillalta4397 6 ปีที่แล้ว +713

    She’s lucky she got out when she did. My ex-husband had an affair after 28 years of marriage and convinced me that he was sick and confused. I stayed with him to try to “help” him. After several more years of stress and questions I had a severe mental breakdown and almost died. With the help of a therapist and medication I was finally able to get out. It’s taken me several more years but I feel like I’ve finally got my life back.

    • @suzette2695
      @suzette2695 6 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      You poor thing... I feel for you. I am glad to hear you are getting thru it now. I have been in the same position before and prefer to stay single now rather than risk my sanity

    • @Coolblog2010
      @Coolblog2010 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      You’re so incredibly strong ❤️❤️

    • @weightlossandlipgloss9417
      @weightlossandlipgloss9417 6 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      I’m so sorry to hear you’ve had to encounter all of that. But I’m so glad to hear you’re getting your life back. Once you’ve hit rock bottom, there’s no where to go but up! I wish you the best!

    • @LR-jl3sv
      @LR-jl3sv 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      God bless you. I really really feel for you and I’m happy that you’re getting your life back.

    • @icequeen1439
      @icequeen1439 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Debbie Villalta Praise God🙏🏻

  • @AB-vv7fl
    @AB-vv7fl 5 ปีที่แล้ว +90

    Good thing she got out early. I was stuck for fourty years.

    • @adfmo2195
      @adfmo2195 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Wow. So sorry. What’s your story?

    • @fortnumglobal
      @fortnumglobal 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Wowwww. They take away your self worth and strip their victims completely. So glad you escaped no matter how late.

    • @Samantha12129
      @Samantha12129 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I was stuck for 22 years

    • @HerMajesty1
      @HerMajesty1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      12 here. I was going to wait until my daughter turned 18 but just couldn't take it anymore. Narcissists are the most insidious abusers.

    • @mrsTraveller64
      @mrsTraveller64 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Well, you can only blame yourself for staying! I know some women stay because they can''t afgord to live by themselves, but even living in a rent-apartment is much better than wasting your life with a sick person.

  • @Tupelo927
    @Tupelo927 6 ปีที่แล้ว +314

    This is far more common than people realize. It's doubly difficult because not only have you been betrayed by your spouse, you also lose your sense of reality & feel you cannot & should not trust your *own* judgement. It's a mind bender & can utterly destroy you. She's very lucky she had the support of her family. Others aren't so lucky.

    • @ChrisAllegedlyNoble
      @ChrisAllegedlyNoble 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Absolutely. I was in a relationship like this for 18 yrs up until last year. Still in the process of getting divorced, as I am a covenant marriage. I made so many excuses and convinced myself that I was in the wrong. Even after he told me everything, I convinced myself that now that he was free of his lies we could start over. Two years later, I started feeling weird about things and confronted him. He gaslighted me for another year before finally telling me he had found his soulmate that he couldn't be with because she was married and had kids (i.e. not for my sake but for her sake). He made me feel crazy and jealous and at fault for all of it.
      We have a son and we co-parent. I can't stand to be around him and he continues to lie and gets mad when he doesn't get his way. He and his newest girlfriend are moving in together this summer and he thinks this is the best situation for our 9 yr old to be apart of.
      I second, triple, quadruple guess everything about myself and my feelings. Am I being over-reactive? Why do I feel this way? Is this normal? Why am I mad one day, sad the next but then also happy? Over time things have gotten so much better. Luckily, I have a great support system between my friends, work and my therapist.
      It could be so much worse for me and I'm thankful it's not.

    • @yarareadstheclassics
      @yarareadstheclassics 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Chris, mine has lasted over twenty years, and I, too, am in the process of getting a divorce. Lies upon lies upon lies until you just don't know what the truth is anymore. I totally, and completely understand.

    • @brendaspringer6224
      @brendaspringer6224 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      So true

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It felt sometimes like I was being strung along for time, that I knew, like I was being manipulated despite my having a high opinion of her as the years went on; I always thought highly of her despite others not so much; I had an image that stayed constant for over a decade and it was a good one; questions I always had got answered this year which led to more questions but I won't let you take our good years away from me although when I see a pretty face these days I run.

    • @timnaklopfenstein8924
      @timnaklopfenstein8924 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Rebecca I couldn’t have said it any better ❤️

  • @achubbysquirrel4661
    @achubbysquirrel4661 6 ปีที่แล้ว +370

    You pretty much have to be a sociopath to be a serial cheater. Don't understand how anyone could live with that guilt.

    • @sjp4u338
      @sjp4u338 6 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      A Chubby Squirrel sociopaths don’t feel guilt.

    • @saratatasval5726
      @saratatasval5726 6 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      DM CM that’s why they said that one would have to be a sociopath

    • @thewrongshoes
      @thewrongshoes 6 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      Kommandant Franz nearly all women? What world do you live in??

    • @ratherbenapping10
      @ratherbenapping10 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Kommandant Franz someone is bitter

    • @RenaWith
      @RenaWith 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      its called covert narcissist, people with no feeling, guilt or regret. there is heaps about them on the internet. many people deal with this.

  • @1freebird577
    @1freebird577 6 ปีที่แล้ว +99

    1 in 20-25 people are like this. I lost two decades of my life to someone like this. They do not always “cheat” like this. But there are other manipulations, control, entitlement, cruelty and abuse was hat escalates. I am thankful to see this coming out on a public forum.

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Only so many people, though, can spend the amount of time Waite does cross-legged.

    • @tinahuttner7280
      @tinahuttner7280 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      You are right, they'll drum up drama and want to be the victim.

    • @brianwalsh1401
      @brianwalsh1401 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Way more than that. At least 10% of the population is either narcissistic or sociopathic. 4% are sociopathic and 6% NPD.

  • @JJ-yu6og
    @JJ-yu6og 6 ปีที่แล้ว +945

    He should lose his green card due to fraud.

    • @IlhaamOR
      @IlhaamOR 6 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      What...….since when is being an arsehole against the law in the USA

    • @liz2880
      @liz2880 6 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      ILhaam Oz keyword: fraud, there is something to it but it would be a bit hard to prove. Also he was living in the US illegally, if he were from South America chances are that he might have never even had a chance at a green card even if he did find himself an American citizen wife.

    • @IlhaamOR
      @IlhaamOR 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Key words, it is not against the law to commit adultery. You have no idea how the system works, particularly the green card process.... liz

    • @sylviagonzalez2305
      @sylviagonzalez2305 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Jojo

    • @Dragon-wl5ic
      @Dragon-wl5ic 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      that is the dumbest comment I have read in a long time, LMAO

  • @suziwainwright848
    @suziwainwright848 5 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    I found out that my husband had a secret life after almost 30 years. He had a Stripper girlfriend for 10 years and several other women “ friends. I thought he was just building his career when he was away from home .He finally admitted to using drugs and other things . I left him , he now has a 27 year old girlfriend who is a former drug addict . He lost his six figure job and is now a homeless junkie. Opioid prescription drugs were his downfall. He was also a great liar. I hope everyone who has that perfect man will not blindly trust him but will check up on him. I lost many years of my life loving a Narcissistic Sociopath .

    • @Bbhjdidbsbaut
      @Bbhjdidbsbaut 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Suzi Wainwright Wow, hope you are okay now.

    • @CopingwithGrattitude
      @CopingwithGrattitude 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It is important these type stories are given publicity. Many victims are far too embarrassed to come forward and speak of their experience. Others do not survive to tell her story. She was lucky he went no contact and she had support to fall back on. Until this happens to you, others can hardly relate-and also believe it could never happen to them. Love bombing and playing upon sympathy are 2 tell tale signs you are dealing with a sociopath.

    • @earlofwickshire5416
      @earlofwickshire5416 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sounds like a pretty cool guy

    • @snaps4emma
      @snaps4emma 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      gosh Suzi we have nearly identical stories, even down to the strippers and vicodin dependancy and fantastic liar.. I hope you are loving youself and healing now.

  • @stephanieremsen8564
    @stephanieremsen8564 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    I was in a relationship like this after my divorce and reading Jen’s book really helped me to understand that these empty vessels are real. They walk amongst us. I, with my empathy, lack of self esteem, and eternal optimism, was ripe for the picking.

    • @yvonnespearing
      @yvonnespearing ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I was in a relationship for 3 months he had rage mand dumped me ,I was soulmate feeling I no only 3 mothe

    • @richardlippincott8881
      @richardlippincott8881 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      And, what do YOU want now??? sympathy? loser. cry in your soup silently, don't make it about YOU!!!!

    • @Grwnflksbzniss
      @Grwnflksbzniss หลายเดือนก่อน

      Soooo true. And it’s crazy how those vulnerabilities make a person susceptible to these types of “relationships”. Yet, in order to have a successful relationship you have to be vulnerable 🤷🏾‍♀️. Best thing we could do is work on ourselves and strengthen our self esteem so that we can be less susceptible to these types of people.

  • @garyweston3269
    @garyweston3269 6 ปีที่แล้ว +319

    My wife is a narcissist.. they literally have no conscience, but they are masters at pretending they do. But it is shallow. Once awakened, it cannot be unseen.

    • @a.k.466
      @a.k.466 6 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Cmdr Harcourt F. Mudd Only unseen by those of us who choose by our own weak soul to unsee. My twin is a narcissist. It's not anything I'd wish...It's the saddest of things....Beyond comprehension

    • @a.k.466
      @a.k.466 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Her adult life has consisted of the tearing down of those who tell her no or stand in her way.

    • @kellyclement5837
      @kellyclement5837 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Cmdr Harcourt F. Mudd Beta male

    • @user-pl5nu6vn7c
      @user-pl5nu6vn7c 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Is divorce not an option? some people just love attention.. Maybe you are the narcissist? I refuse to believe any grown man would stay around a women that is so unberable.

    • @garyweston3269
      @garyweston3269 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Xher Blood yes it is an option. I am working with doctors, a psychologist, a lawyer with expertise in Npd and her family. We are approaching it as a medical issue. In my case, as of now, her narcissistic behaviors were exposed widely to family and friends and is reigned in. She now admits her behavior, shows understanding that it was wrong, and has committed to therapy. I gave her a choice. Fix herself, or lose her family including her daughter. She chose her family. Due to her 'awakening' I have learned she is narcissistic because of family neglect as a child. She was abused by a teacher among other children when she was in preschool as well. It took vast amounts of energy, time, confusion, therapy with a professional, and expense for me personally. I am still I'll with cptsd on a cocktail of meds. At this time.. I still maintain vigilance. I work at home full time to keep an eye on my wife and child both, until her full diagnosis and therapy is in full swing.
      I didn't need to do all this. I could have walked. Sometimes I think I should have.. I suffered not only from abuse, but trying to help a person with a broken soul...I ask myself every day. Should I walk now, and heal myself now.. or do I work hard to save a family, my daughter and possibly my wife who herself suffers mental illness. This what makes it all so hard.
      The difficulty is trust. She isn't trustworthy. She needs to prove herself immensely and show that she cares for family and not only herself. She has a lot of trust building (with me) to do.
      This is why the abused suffer so much. The cognitive dissonance. The idea that someone who you should trust your life with and grow old with could be so cruel yet so absolutely clueless is amazing.
      My ex was abusive and covert. I lasted 14 years about with her. This one. Overt. On year 3. Her narcissism came out about year 1.5 or 2, for me. Then exposed past nastiness from a previous man. Long story.but suffice to say I know him well now, and his experiences were very similar if not identical to me.
      She is on a short leash, in a sense. Her future is in her hands and she knows this darn well.

  • @andymorris358
    @andymorris358 5 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    I read the book “A beautiful, terrible thing” and it was incredibly descriptive. I cannot believe someone could be like this. I feel so bad for what she had to go through.

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      I think the construction worker she was seeing before that in her book was really Matthew McConaughey.

  • @eliser9776
    @eliser9776 6 ปีที่แล้ว +136

    I understand this story in my bones. I once knew a horrible man that also changed the course of my life. She said all the key words... boundaries. I had no boundaries but it did not occur to me. I am a different woman today.

    • @a.k.466
      @a.k.466 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Elise Rockey I'd like to believe I am as well. Wiser...But they are everywhere now. It's like they bred overnight.

    • @bluecollarlit
      @bluecollarlit 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Why is that? Why are there more of them now?

    • @dahliabreezy79
      @dahliabreezy79 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      THIS AND EXACTLY WHAT I AM LIVING TODAY IN MY MARRIAGE. CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS?

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's another example of a good, trusting person poisoned by the garbage that seeks them out--predators are what they are called; it's amazing to me that he threw someone this good away; where he'll end-up who knows and no one will care.

    • @floraelizabeth1589
      @floraelizabeth1589 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Same.

  • @lavalampazzz
    @lavalampazzz 5 ปีที่แล้ว +50

    God bless that broker. It could have lost him a client but he did it anyway cause it was the right thing to do.

  • @bobbijotoy1968
    @bobbijotoy1968 6 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    I can relate completely. This sounds like my story, too. It’s heartbreaking. Being a survivor is courageous and I am proud of you. I am proud of me, too!

    • @RG-iw7py
      @RG-iw7py 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Bobbi, I'm proud of you! Well done! :)

    • @myrahouse2368
      @myrahouse2368 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Bobbi Jo Toy me to but luckily I was devalued after 7 months it completely blind sided me.
      He’s still Hooving me..

  • @klattalexis
    @klattalexis 6 ปีที่แล้ว +59

    Always, always run a background check & have your partner tested for STDs BEFORE you get serious or intimate or even marry anyone! There are STDs out there which there are no cures for now

    • @bookbag6432
      @bookbag6432 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Unfortunately they can always cheat on you and give you an std later on

    • @genevawelch9865
      @genevawelch9865 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Book Bag Yea that’s a problem. So if you are in a relationship with someone do you guys get yearly checkups together?

    • @jeanchampion671
      @jeanchampion671 ปีที่แล้ว

      I agree.

  • @cathylarkins9949
    @cathylarkins9949 6 ปีที่แล้ว +66

    I've been through this and it's devastating.....

    • @RG-iw7py
      @RG-iw7py 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Maude, I hope it made you stronger and now you figure them out faster. There are so many of them around.

    • @Dawnie-bi6qu
      @Dawnie-bi6qu 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Same here only much more devestating

    • @user-yk9sk7pg6v
      @user-yk9sk7pg6v 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I am sorry, Cathy - I hope you are ok now.

  • @mascara1777
    @mascara1777 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    I had a cancelled engagement in my 20's it was the absolute best thing that ever happened to me and I thank GOD that I got away from that evil man. Ladies, if you have any nagging doubt about the man you're with, just know that if you need to break up with him that it is possible to over ANY man. Any breakup is better than a lifetime wasted, your best years wasted, and your self esteem shattered, with the wrong person.

  • @zuljasinanaj429
    @zuljasinanaj429 4 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    I was with a sociopath for seven years. And when he left,he left me in mental and financial anguish. Sitting here, five years later, still single because I’ve lost the will and ability to date.. I’m still trying to come to terms with what happened to me. I’m still healing .. but I wonder what did I do to deserve the nightmare that was him

    • @veronicatemblador2930
      @veronicatemblador2930 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I've been married to a man that sounds so similar to yours. And I find myself in the same situation. He has taken away my whole being. I know I need to find help. And I hope you do too. Stay strong!!

    • @CopingwithGrattitude
      @CopingwithGrattitude 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      You didn't do anything to deserve it, you were in the right place at the right time and he chose you. They are masters of their craft. What empowered me most was exposing him to protect others and researching the disorder. It helped me to finally accept none of it was real and no contact is the only way to deal with these less than human beings. There is no future with a Sociopath. Still in therapy 3 years out, no willingness to ever date again.

    • @zuljasinanaj429
      @zuljasinanaj429 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Aimee Sacks I’m sorry to hear that. Same here. And everyone looks at me like there’s something wrong w me .. because I’m still alone (traumazied)! My only goal is to continue healing and if that looks like being single the. So be it. Sending u all my best.

    • @MsIlovemusic07
      @MsIlovemusic07 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You didn’t deserve anything. It’s Bc of how good he knew you were that he chose you. He wanted someone opposite of him.

    • @kunalpradhan9225
      @kunalpradhan9225 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Blame yourself for being weak.

  • @elizabethharttley4073
    @elizabethharttley4073 6 ปีที่แล้ว +132

    Oh i had a narcissist boyfriend, they are clever beyond belief. I checked info with his family and friends, because he tried to keep us sequestered from eachother. Now he's living on the streets

    • @sBaby-sd8ob
      @sBaby-sd8ob 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Elizabeth Harttley I know that’s right girl! I did too! This hit on EVERYTHING A NARCISSIST IS! I’ve heard usually when a sociopath is labeled a sociopath they are also Always a narcissist as well!

    • @bizygirl1
      @bizygirl1 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Elizabeth Harttley Right where he belongs!

    • @misstmemrs
      @misstmemrs 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      If he's a narcissist his family probably is too. He could be the family scapegoat.

    • @elizabethharttley4073
      @elizabethharttley4073 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      bizygirl1
      Naw nobody belongs on the streets

    • @elizabethharttley4073
      @elizabethharttley4073 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Honorable Catsmeat
      He hasn't bounced back from the streets. I am sure he can't afford to monitor me. He became afraid after our last conversation.

  • @janasali821
    @janasali821 5 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    Ive been through a very similar experience, but I wish I could reclaim myself like she did. I stayed too long, suffered so much before I figured it all out. The narcissist is so good at the lying and gaslighting

    • @ararefind9069
      @ararefind9069 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I think you and her would make a good pair ....message her

  • @shirleyortiz5003
    @shirleyortiz5003 6 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    How strong this women is. How difficult!

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      It makes you question your judgement; she was with some people before and they were normal and out of all of them some of us pick not-so-wisely or rush into things; the warning signs were there, something is telling us to hold-up and think about it , but we go there, anyway--because it's an adventure, and the other choices are but so predictable!

  • @catcls9205
    @catcls9205 5 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    whats sad is it destroys your trust and sometimes you never trust men again , subconsciously

    • @lovedove6108
      @lovedove6108 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Not all men are the same. Generalizing helps no one.

    • @Quiche543
      @Quiche543 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@lovedove6108 She isn't talking about generalizing that all men are bad, but that this type of treatment can destroy your trust when it comes to men or trust with anyone....subconsciously!! You may not even realize it, but it will affect your future decisions. It can traumatize people to be used & abused by someone who has a personality problem. Lack of trust can be a deep-seated issue that colors your life negatively!!

    • @supergmx1046
      @supergmx1046 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Or women, and it does not have to be subconsciously. It can make you paranoid even with the best partner. If you cannot trust it will harm any relationship, but like the lady says when the dots don't connect then alarms should be raised. you should need to look objectively not emotionally

    • @brianwalsh1401
      @brianwalsh1401 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      But it's also a wake up call to how many cluster B personality disordered people there are, at least 10% of the pop.

  • @JJ-yu6og
    @JJ-yu6og 6 ปีที่แล้ว +90

    No sincere remorse. Skilled charmer. Calm. Sounds Innocent. Gaslighting. Manipulating.

    • @icequeen1439
      @icequeen1439 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Jojo Jo Bingo!

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Mine would ask me if I loved her and I did; I wasn't pushy enough considering what might be going on on her end. A lot, that I would find out too late; you kind of have to hand it to these people, though: they get far.

    • @laterrainprophetess1705
      @laterrainprophetess1705 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      His name is Bjarne Sorensen, he lives in Nyborg Denmark. Everything that comes out his mouth is a 'lie'...RUN AND DON'T STOP!!!

  • @elisamastromarino7123
    @elisamastromarino7123 6 ปีที่แล้ว +275

    Ahahahah I find it incredibly satisfying that she's on television promoting a book that will, no doubt, be read by many; and "Marco" is still somewhere feeling empty and soulless. 😂🤣😄🤗 She triumphed from his failures! Fabulous!

    • @djcrackademiks1191
      @djcrackademiks1191 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Elisa Mastromarino good point

    • @Vixenallure365
      @Vixenallure365 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Lol sociopaths don't care about or feel bad about that he might even feel good like he is the only reason she is able to survive and thrive so she should thank him.

    • @a.life.reimagined
      @a.life.reimagined 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Elisa Mastromarino they don't feel empathy, he feels nothing. Period!

    • @hello-vs4dc
      @hello-vs4dc 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Elisa Mastromarino - I think “Marco” feels just terrific about the whole thing. He managed to get a legal Green Card because of this marriage (and although she didn’t mention it in this interview, it wouldn’t surprise me at all if he is a full US citizen at this point), and then he managed to get out of his marriage easily and quickly when it no longer served any of his needs or interests to stay in it - and he even got out of having to act like a father (I ***would*** be surprised if he pays any child support). All of us know “Marco” IS empty and missing a soul, but that isn’t anything he will ever realize, much less something he will regret.
      BUT ... there IS one way she COULD make him feel something, and that is by reporting to federal law enforcement that her ex-husband only obtained his Green Card by defrauding her, her family and friends, and the US government. If he isn’t a citizen yet, his Green Card would probably be taken away after a bit of investigation to confirm he illegally obtained a Green Card. I doubt his citizenship can be removed if he has already become a citizen, but that’s okay ... after investigation to prove he obtained his Green Card illegally, the US can put him in jail or (hopefully) even prison if we aren’t able to deport him! Admittedly, none of this would cause “Marco” to feel empty, but it would make him feel sorry for himself - and that’s what he deserves.

    • @forreal245
      @forreal245 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      hello...I feel the same. Marco targeted an easy "mark" to get his green card. He could care less how she feels. She's dumb.

  • @haleyshouse9536
    @haleyshouse9536 6 ปีที่แล้ว +79

    This sounds exactly what I went through. I found out at one point there was four of us women. I had two kids with him! The ironic part of my story is that he ended up getting shot and killed by a women's boyfriend.

    • @a.k.466
      @a.k.466 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      QT Hearts Sometimes we live long enough to witness or hear when justice has the final word.

    • @bookbag6432
      @bookbag6432 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I swear reading these comments makes me want to become a nun. Oh my God. And I have 3 brothers and they are so amazing that I can't imagine how some men are.

    • @adr5389
      @adr5389 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      talk about good riddance

    • @endeavouringit
      @endeavouringit 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Good !!

  • @MsChantae
    @MsChantae 6 ปีที่แล้ว +116

    where did he find all that time tho? to have multiple women....that's what I always wonder.

    • @blank3115
      @blank3115 6 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Taylor Chantae they always find time honey lol ... right though, to go apartment shopping

    • @RG-iw7py
      @RG-iw7py 5 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Taylor, he doesn't have time for remorse, reflection, self improvement (believes is perfect). Has no internal life, no worries about the dear and near ones, is constantly looking for ways to fill his void, be the centre of attention. That gives him plenty of time. ;)

    • @lg55015
      @lg55015 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      In the book, she mentions that he would "work" 15 hour days and would always leave her side due to "work" since he had just opened a new restaurant, she believed him.

    • @yarareadstheclassics
      @yarareadstheclassics 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Liz, my ex also worked many long hour days.... supposedly. Who knows what he was up to.

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      The hospitality industry has a lot of elbow-rubbing; when I worked at a hotel it was the ones I couldn't get to that hardly bothered me.

  • @uneedborda
    @uneedborda 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I went through this, as my ex-wife is a classic textbook sociopathic narcissist who was abusive in all ways and took advantage of me financially. Pathological lying as a defense mechanism, and manipulating everyone to have everyone believe she is a victim when she is a victimizer of possibly everyone she encounters. This was also the case with her abusive parents. Actually my ex-wife's siblings are also very abusive towards the long term relationships they are in as well. It's weird when it is a whole family of abusers because of their ability to take advantage of others. Parents who kept their children as children, and then sought out significant others to take care of them. I'm very lucky I got out even though it cost me somethings financially and emotionally. But I am thankful to be out of that abusive family for good. It even led to an arrest of my ex-wife for domestic violence and assault, that's what luckily changed everything for me.

    • @battlehymnoftheempath3610
      @battlehymnoftheempath3610 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I am the daugher of a female narcissist. I am very sorry. I went no contact with my entire family. I am a fighter, but the experience nearly destroyed me. God speed to you. I actually think Megyn Kelly exhibits the traits of female narcissism so it's weird to see a sociopath interviewing someone about their experience with a sociopath.

  • @allisonstrong5661
    @allisonstrong5661 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    As a surviver of this. I appreciate you sharing this story. Helps those of us who have been thru it.

  • @BonJody
    @BonJody 6 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    My ex is exactly like that down to me saying do you remember saying you still love me and him looking me dead in the eye and saying you’re making that bullsh*t up. They feed off your self esteem like emotional vampires when I met him I was very confident in myself by the time we broke up my entire self worth had been based in his opinion of me. I read a quote about narcissists that is also true. They will convince you that you are the center of their world then tell you you aren’t good enough to be apart of it.

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Waite should be president, lifting cheating Congressmen in the air like Darth Vader.

  • @memelia90
    @memelia90 6 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    i actually suspected i was lovebombed by my last bf... im starting to realize it might be a blessing he is now my ex

  • @galepatrick1702
    @galepatrick1702 6 ปีที่แล้ว +151

    beautiful and articulate woman - gorgeous child - wish them great happiness

    • @emilyadams58
      @emilyadams58 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      If they were ugly, would you wish them the same happiness?

    • @RG-iw7py
      @RG-iw7py 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Emily Adams ;) Smiling people are always beautiful. Have a good day!

    • @TheLoveweaver
      @TheLoveweaver 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@emilyadams58 she was just making an observation. It's not that serious.

  • @briannaleehealing
    @briannaleehealing 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    I loved a man like this, tried everything in my power to "fix him." Absolutely devastating.

  • @suesheification
    @suesheification 6 ปีที่แล้ว +223

    Plot twist. She marries the broker.

    • @lee48lee68
      @lee48lee68 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      sue she - We all hope she finds love for herself and her daughter. They are so much better than what happened to hem.

    • @deannefabro6970
      @deannefabro6970 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I thought the same thing.

    • @lyndsieannette957
      @lyndsieannette957 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      😂😂

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      It's like, guys like that attract someone as hot as she is, then they throw it away--wait a minute, I had a hot blonde who threw me away which is why I was attracted to and read the book (nearly every page was like a smack in the face sometimes, but mine was nowhere near as bad as this).

    • @ciao614
      @ciao614 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      That's what I was thinking too!

  • @aaroncain403
    @aaroncain403 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    He sounds like a sociopath to me. Good for her she got out, people like that can be dangerous.

  • @redwoods7370
    @redwoods7370 5 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    When I heard "green card application..." Says a lot. Avoid the green card needing men, ladies. So sorry for this lady and her child.

  • @ameliamyers5871
    @ameliamyers5871 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Sad she has a child with him, having a child with a narcissist and having to co-parent. I know ALL about it.

  • @kennaragaller4188
    @kennaragaller4188 5 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    The man is Carlos Beltran. No relationship for him ever again I suppose LOL

    • @jimparsons4312
      @jimparsons4312 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      That’s who she wrote the book about?

    • @Mayrita77
      @Mayrita77 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      That’s a very common Hispanic name

    • @jessicamarie8299
      @jessicamarie8299 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I follow him on Instagram he has a new girlfriend she’s Latina go figure he only wanted to marry a white woman was for the green card

    • @jeneka0989
      @jeneka0989 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jessicamarie8299 sad . And got her pregnant

  • @evalevy2909
    @evalevy2909 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I had a similar experience on many levels but even with no contact from my ex my daughter grew up to be a sociopath herself and it's a pain I can't put into words. There is a genetic component which I didn't know.

  • @sandisstar6631
    @sandisstar6631 6 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    It’s like they all have the same playbook I’m still not ok 1 year later

    • @PHlophe
      @PHlophe 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      dah-lin maybe you had little to offer once you settled in the marriage.

    • @sandisstar6631
      @sandisstar6631 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Lechiffresix six Actually who are you to even write a comment like that when you don’t even have a clue obviously of ever being around a sociopath who is verbally and physically abusive. Ignorance is bliss I guess

    • @teresewoltz8627
      @teresewoltz8627 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Like everyone dating the same person

    • @Dragon-wl5ic
      @Dragon-wl5ic 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      hahhahaha, my thoughts exactly!!!

    • @srso4660
      @srso4660 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@PHlophe you're obviously a sociopathic, narcissist yourself.

  • @ameliamyers5871
    @ameliamyers5871 6 ปีที่แล้ว +66

    He is a narcissist.

    • @teresewoltz8627
      @teresewoltz8627 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Yup, the minute I heard lovebombing, I knew he was a Narc

    • @ameliamyers5871
      @ameliamyers5871 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Terese Woltz Me too! Sad thing is you can be with someone for 3 , 4 more years and not know until you start figuring things out

    • @garyweston3269
      @garyweston3269 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes he is.. it is a terrible thing to experience, I am in the midst of it myself with my narcissist wife now.

    • @errinmora
      @errinmora 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Lovebombing and gaslighting! Their 2 fav methods.

    • @cforest4281
      @cforest4281 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Mirroring and turning soulmates into cellmates. Their sleep patterns are often a dead giveaway. Predators usually hunt at night.

  • @notebookluvr
    @notebookluvr 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    I need to write a book. Her story sounds like a fairy tale compared to mine.

    • @notsigne3850
      @notsigne3850 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes, he doesnt at all seem servere enough to be a sociopath.

  • @Nota769
    @Nota769 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Been there, was fooled for twenty years. Each time he had such a good explanation but also you can’t imagine someone would do that

  • @sandisstar6631
    @sandisstar6631 6 ปีที่แล้ว +78

    They literally have no soul

    • @sandisstar6631
      @sandisstar6631 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Honorable Catsmeat Your so judgmental

    • @garyweston3269
      @garyweston3269 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      They don't have a conscience, thus they have no soul. Psychopaths are not human as they lack empathy. They are automatons. Doppelgangers. They are typically abuse victims themselves.. proliferating a disease, destroying families, children, and anyone they contact. Psychopaths are self destructive, and their disorder prevents them from wavering off their path. It is sad. I pity such people, however they harm others purposefully. With intent. With knowledge. They just don't care. This makes them inherently evil.

    • @bobpowers9637
      @bobpowers9637 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Women need to trust their instinct more. Men need to make better choices. We should all do both.

    • @RG-iw7py
      @RG-iw7py 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Cmdr, that's interesting what you say. Recently, one narcissistic woman wanted to use me. Surprisingly in her gestures, ways she reminded me of another narc lady I knew for many years. When I refused her help she used the same two sentences the other used to manipulate me emotionally. Since that meeting, I believe they may host a Jezabel.
      Yes, they know right from wrong, they don't care for others, but are a victims too. I have a compassion for them. And it is in their power to change.

    • @garyweston3269
      @garyweston3269 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      R G my wife is a narcissist.. still with her, at least at the moment. Every day, every conversation, and interaction requires watchfulness and the active mind of an investigator. Nothing said by her can be taken for face value..and as she has lost her power over family as I exposed her, she still constantly tests boundaries. Her Chinese social culture and situation prevents her from discarding me... and with her families and friends awareness now, she is in a corner. If she leaves she is effed. If she stays she must put visible effort into improvement, or she knows I will leave her and take our 2yo daughter away too. Some days she is a sweetheart, especially when she wants something. Most times she is cold. It is a weirdly lonely state for me to be in. The other person is there, but not there. Then there are the frequent immature rage and narcissistic blowouts. In that state she literally has to be treated like a 2 year old. It is beyond exhausting. I have diagnosed cptsd. My wife's mother is here now, and despite not speaking the same language we've used translators. We are approaching this as a family medical matter. Her mom is a psychician, and I finally got through to her, made her understand her daughter's illness. The question is.. why.. I could just walk and find my sanity and health again. I don't know. Straight answer. We will see what happens. She agreed to therapy, though as with narcissistic people it is likely to not help. Time will tell, and should I give up, I can openly say I did all I could to make it work. The failure won't be on my shoulders, and if I am successful, just maybe a rare positive story can come out of this. I may not be well minded for stating.. if you knew the horrors and injuries I endured from her violence.. her family knows what she has done. I may feel alone, but in reality I'm not. I have my daughter, friends, and now family on both sides backing me.

  • @ratherbenapping10
    @ratherbenapping10 6 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    sounds almost identical to my ex sociopath. theyARE predators. I confronted him about another woman and he BROKE UP WITH ME immediately after blaming me. he also lied about his father being in a coma and he lied about being a drug dealer. I think I may do a video on it one day.

    • @RG-iw7py
      @RG-iw7py 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Rene, please do if you are comfortable with it. The more words gets out the better. We have an epidemic of narcissistic/toxic behaviours. Luckily, there are plenty of people sharing their experience, helping out other victims. Good luck!

  • @latoyabolt9459
    @latoyabolt9459 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you for sharing this video. The last part really is very helpful in my situation at this time. Thank you.

  • @user-pl5nu6vn7c
    @user-pl5nu6vn7c 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    Seems like people who trust blindly always get screwed over. Know the signs and leave when you first realize something is off. Her ex sounds like how my ex would act but with a more naive woman. I feel bad for her but hopefully she is wiser. Never trust anyone. Don't care if you are married. My ex hated me for having trust issues but turns out it was the best trait to have because I never gave him the opportunity to screw me over. First sign that he started to act funny, I left him and went home. God handled the rest and we broke up a few days after. I could not be happier. Glad im out of that relationship. Looking back now he was definitly a sociopath but my skeptical and untrusting nature made me see right through the bull. He wanted so badly to manipulate, control and break me down. I never allowed him too. I hope more women stop believing in the stupid disney crap. There is a motive for everything, including relationships. Unfortantly in her case he was using her for a green card. My ex wish he had something to use me for but I never allowed him. Did not invest a dime into his wallets lol. He tried to cheat but I suggested we both cheat on eachother together so I won't feel so left out lmao. Im way to crazy to be mest with

    • @michaelvolsky1851
      @michaelvolsky1851 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Kudos to the host, guest, Xerox the author of the reply

    • @thegiantpaperpanda
      @thegiantpaperpanda 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Awesome reply! I'm glad you saw through the stupid sociopathic games. Guys like this hate women they can't control.

    • @mariaseidi1226
      @mariaseidi1226 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      XFendi Prada Im Happy For you that you survive being with samebody Like that"sleping with the enemi " but IT must have been emocionally and mentally draining ...you have to sleep with one eye Open😀😁😂

  • @donnadilanag9404
    @donnadilanag9404 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    omg i want to read you book, thank you for standing up for the rest of us.. i lived this to the letter.. I felt mine was extreme narcissist, who wrote the manuel

  • @michellemarie2590
    @michellemarie2590 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    It’s sad that trust is outdated in society today. Marriage is the ultimate trust relationship, wow 😯 awful. She’s beautiful

  • @eliser9776
    @eliser9776 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Rebuilding from the ground up.... classic recovery from a Sociopathic relationship. Thanks for sharing your story.

  • @kellyfeverxo
    @kellyfeverxo 6 ปีที่แล้ว +83

    He wasn't just "living in New York illegally", he was living in America legally. That was her first red flag that she ignored because he gave her compliments. He married her to become a legal citizen. End of story.

    • @apbxny216
      @apbxny216 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      kellyfeverxo
      🤔When a person tells you that they are illegal...RUN!

    • @margosparkle4299
      @margosparkle4299 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Part of the story but definitely not the end of the story.

    • @butterflyygyrlsworld5106
      @butterflyygyrlsworld5106 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      kellyfeverxo very true 💯

    • @Mayrita77
      @Mayrita77 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yeah it’s simple

    • @genevawelch9865
      @genevawelch9865 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      kellyfeverxo And got her pregnant to keep her trapped

  • @MalibuSurf8
    @MalibuSurf8 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    my ex fiance and i were both in the military and i was away for two weeks and he cheated on me and broke up with me over text saying "he wasn't ready to be married" and then got married to the girl he cheated on me with a month later

    • @RG-iw7py
      @RG-iw7py 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Kaitlyn, that's so common behaviour for a narcissist. He did you a favour by removing himself from your life. You must have done something well in protecting yourself.
      But anyway did you check what are your vulnerable points, core wound from childhood (John Bradshaw)? Are you an Empath, codependent, profesionally fullfilled?... Do you listen to your guts?
      Please, discover that (and keep for yourself) before you meet the next one. At the beginning they are very convincing.
      Best of luck!

  • @Julia-en1ok
    @Julia-en1ok 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Scary situation - great interview & great memoir! Highly recommend Jen’s book, A Beautiful, Terrible Thing to the readers out there. I am so glad the guy is no longer in the picture.

  • @marcosjuarez7809
    @marcosjuarez7809 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Wow, that story was a total shocker.

  • @claudineannschultz9726
    @claudineannschultz9726 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Not everyone deserves a second chance!

  • @elizabethtaylor5044
    @elizabethtaylor5044 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Back in the mid 90s I dated this guy who I fell in love with but he had started being abusive and at the time I suspected he was cheating but I wasn’t sure 100%. We had this other couple that we were friends with, or at least I thought, and on at least two occasions I cried to her because I thought he was cheating on me. The last time I talked to her about it I was already thinking of leaving him I just needed the proverbial nail in the coffin, and I begged her through my tears to tell me if she knew that he had been cheating. The only thing that she would say was “well I have heard tell about it”... I did find out that it was the truth later on, and not only that, but he and his side chick had been hanging out and partying with her and her husband BEFORE I cried and begged her to tell me. A few years later a friend of mine sent me to this really cool bar and that same girl was a cocktail waitress there. She let us run up a bar tab and I “accidentally” skipped out on it. Oops.#AndIDon’tFeelBadAboutIt

  • @cleanfreak2005
    @cleanfreak2005 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Megyn ask a question, then talks for 20 minutes explaining her question and what the answer should be....

  • @johnwilmer2047
    @johnwilmer2047 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    It is imperative to acknowledge the pain sociopaths and cluster B personalties give you. No time for excuses but walking away completely from these monsters. I dated a toxic borderline and she was beyond abusive. Still healing from that traumatic experience.

  • @Stardust414
    @Stardust414 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    A similar situation happened to me. It's been almost a decade now and I'm finally out thx to those willing to provide help in a number of different ways. You don't realize just how much you need to start your life over with no help and no resources. I've been amazed by the complete generosity of strangers that has opened the door to move forward. If you believe in a higher power please let that love guide you and perhaps consider opening your home or wallet. If you can't do that consider providing your time for childcare, transportation or offering a vehicle you no longer drive. There are SO many ways in which someone trying to "get out" of an abusive relationship needs help starting over. I believe we all have something to offer those in need, even when we are in need ourself 🙏😇💕

  • @candicegerman2748
    @candicegerman2748 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Wow, it seems like I've dated quite a few Sociopaths from the characteristics described

  • @designsonyouinparis
    @designsonyouinparis 5 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    This happened to me as well- Emotional predators are very difficult to predict until, at least, most of the times, it is too late- This happens when the person you date, love and trust is not the person one marries- They can be the most charming, caring, loving, charismatic people- They are so good at figuring out what your needs are and while they target these needs and desires- reel you in! It is all in their plan- Most of all, if not all of the times, they will make you think that you are the crazy person, the one that is imagining this reality. I will say this: follow your gut instincts- If a person is constantly making you doubt yourself, not allowing you space for things that are important to you, isolating from friends and family- verbally abusing you because you deserve it and need to be taught a lesson- run for the hills! Just when I was getting stronger to make my move and leave I found out I was expecting- Not having the support of my family, away from home in a new city, I had to make the best of a terrible situation- One that I paid dearly for- I don't take divorce lightly, but, if you see such a pattern- plan and move on when the time is right for you. Don't think things will get better- They only get worse- I wished I knew then what I know now- There are 2 books I wished I had access to back in the day: "Stop Walking on Egg Shells" & "The Script" - and always be prepared- I view it as studying every night- Chances are you may not have that pop quiz but, wouldn't it be helpful and empowering if you came to class always prepared! Trust yourself and God first before anyone else!

  • @kateosborn9904
    @kateosborn9904 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    THIS WOMAN IS SO STRONG!!!! Good for her! So articulate! So clear! So matter of fact. Bravo woman! Bravo!

  • @IAmTheHypnochick
    @IAmTheHypnochick 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I had a similar experience with an ex... Thanks for sharing 💕

  • @breklein3338
    @breklein3338 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    I have dated two “Marcos” now. Thankfully I am so over one of them who ended up in jail...still working on sorting out all the other one’s sociopathic lies to get completely over it. So easy to attract traumatic relationships when your childhood was traumatic.

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      If they're extra-foxey it's almost impossible to turn away.

  • @leebeetle
    @leebeetle 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    The web lies.. They actually believe their own lies after a while.

  • @timnaklopfenstein8924
    @timnaklopfenstein8924 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Something so similar happened to me. The hardest part is to get out of the denial. But totally relate to the fact of feeling overjoyed to just have an answer. Biggest thing. Know your worth, don’t trust right away, and if you have a gut instinct listen.

  • @marishahes8412
    @marishahes8412 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I was with someone just like this it's excruciating to find out the truth when you hit with a liar.

  • @dawni5365
    @dawni5365 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    He will do the,same thing to her eventually....same happened to me... you got out.....good for you

  • @emmadeemmut1352
    @emmadeemmut1352 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Wow, she must be so intelligent and love herself a lot for being able to get out of that relationship. I think a lot of women aren't sure of ourselves and thereby stay with him for far too long.

  • @TheBurkechi
    @TheBurkechi 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I’ve lived through this. So awful

  • @88omair
    @88omair 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    The Dr was amazing in her explanations and demeanor while explaining

  • @kimmyp0016
    @kimmyp0016 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Omg it’s like looking at myself in the mirror !! I think he is related to my husband full of lies not the man I married !!

  • @DebbieBlanke
    @DebbieBlanke 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This book and video are priceless. I do wish they had expounded more on the "personality" they refer to. They touched on the word sociopath, but going further with that, illuminating more about narcissism traits, which although they enumerated beautifully, never really connected to the personality DISORDER. Having gone through this to a devastating degree, I only WISH there was more blatant and bold truths about the mental illness that is a silent killer of the soul. I wondered countless times, "why hadn't anybody ever taught how to connect those dots; how to recognize mental incontinence. Its only AFTER the fact that one hopefully stumbles upon the truth of the psychotic bulldozer that just flattened your life.

    • @RG-iw7py
      @RG-iw7py 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Debbie, I couldn't agree more. Such disorders are so common now that parents should teach their children about them.
      Constantly, I see that normal people can't believe how bad, mean, cruel narcissist can be.

    • @DebbieBlanke
      @DebbieBlanke 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      R G Yes, and unfortunately narcissist has become an overused word that desensitizes the severity of the disorder.

  • @uupeaceunique1284
    @uupeaceunique1284 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    If it feels too good to be true then it’s too good to be true

  • @oat_birdflash962
    @oat_birdflash962 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Awww so sorry 😐 that she had to go through that . She had a beautiful baby girl . Such a blessing !!

  • @thepamela050
    @thepamela050 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Anytime it's a quickie relationship where a green card comes into play one has to wonder is it love or citizenship.

  • @jem1085
    @jem1085 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Went through the same thing :/

  • @maximillion8442
    @maximillion8442 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Happy to see Dr Durvasula on here. Her videos helped me tremendously in disengaging from a toxic relationship and setting healthy boundaries in my relationships; I hope this exposure will help others discover her - and a path to healthier relationships therein - as well ♥️

  • @JBlondiHarrison
    @JBlondiHarrison 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This kind of situation I would never dare blame a woman for finding herself in this position. Even a man for that matter. But despite charm and the in person reactions that fill your head. I seriously stress to read body language. And tho still difficult in person to detect look at his body in those pregnancy pictures. U can see how there is almost no feeling and just the stiffness. I'll admit my man is awkward in front of the camera but even then u can still see in his mannerism in pictures his feelings towards me and the care... I feel for her. Congrats for finding your way out!

  • @katiix
    @katiix 6 ปีที่แล้ว +68

    She's gorgeous I don't know why he would cheat on her! But he was obviously just using her for a Green Card smh Typical!

    • @amchthompson
      @amchthompson 6 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Sociopaths don't care about beauty. They care about getting what they want and will step on anyone, even their own mother and children if necessary. Sociopaths are constantly looking for something shiny and new. They get tired of companions quickly and have the next picked out before ending things with the last. They're incapable of treasuring anything or anyone. Research sociopathy as it's quite interesting.

    • @PHlophe
      @PHlophe 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      kestelle would it be ok to cheat on her if she was a less prettier white girl ?

    • @missychelle33
      @missychelle33 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Feels better to be kind you just described my ex

    • @amchthompson
      @amchthompson 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      missychelle33 Sorry you went through this. I'm glad he's an ex. Make sure he remains an ex and I don't think you should let him anywhere near you even if appears as though he'd make a good friend, even if 15 years have passed lol. They're incapable of changing. Sandra Brown writes a great book on how to spot narcissists and sociopaths. I think all the single ladies and men should read it. These sickos go after loving individuals and will chew them up and spit them out. I've known quite a few and I've been the victim of a few but not romantically, they've been friends. Now that I know what to look out for I feel safer. All those who I've dealt with did come with big red flags but I was naive. Who doesn't want to be around someone who's fun and makes them feel great? Who isn't impressed with stories of how these people have overcome great odds? Who doesn't feel bad for the really sweet person whose entire family has turned on them because their evil (mother, father, brother or whoever) has lied about this sweet person? All these things were big red flags but I had no clue. If you search TH-cam for "Sandra Brown narcissist" you will find many videos. They're more educational than entertaining but they're fascinating.

    • @toraltoral3509
      @toraltoral3509 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Kat Estelle she is average looking giant white women.. She looks manly. It is 2018, blonde, manly looking pasty skin are not desirable.

  • @livingwaterutube
    @livingwaterutube 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    "he vanished" = he's out there multiplying the damage to many others. Some others will not be so lucky.

  • @memadelrey5099
    @memadelrey5099 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    God bless you and your lovely daughter, God watch over you, take one day at a time ♥️♥️

  • @shelleyg9945
    @shelleyg9945 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    its happening now to me. im sick of the lies on top of lies

  • @justforyouenjoy
    @justforyouenjoy 6 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Anyone who needs a green card will do anything to get one - try to marry or if female get pregnant - I know a girl who is doing this and trying to get a guy on dating web sight to marry

    • @PHlophe
      @PHlophe 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      y'all are focused on the green card as if it ought to have been his motive. he was 2 timing her , that's the real tea.

    • @liz2880
      @liz2880 6 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Lechiffresix six the thing is he never really loved her, their relationship was a lie and he probably only did start a relationship with her for the green card. Their whole relationship is like a lie....

    • @jessicamarie8299
      @jessicamarie8299 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@PHlophe he is now getting engaged to a Latina woman he obviously only used this woman for the green card he never loved her. I follow him on his Instagram page.

    • @jessicamarie8299
      @jessicamarie8299 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@liz2880 he is now getting engaged to a Latina woman he obviously only used this woman for the green card he never loved her. I follow him on his Instagram page.

  • @TopHatKitty
    @TopHatKitty 6 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    I'd be so afraid of the personality developing in my kid

    • @-Reagan
      @-Reagan 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      It's learned behavior - nurture more than nature and now that she has him out of her life, he can't pass those traits on by influencing the child - children model after their parents. As long as she doesn't get taken in by another one, the kid will be fine.

    • @TopHatKitty
      @TopHatKitty 6 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Marsha Reagan that's not true personality is highly heritable

    • @errinmora
      @errinmora 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I think if he stays out of the picture she wont pick up on those behaviors, so that works in her favor.

    • @RG-iw7py
      @RG-iw7py 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      TopHatKitty, my friend has 5 kids, she teaches them the same things, but each of them has a different personality, behaviour.
      Child can learn patterns from his parents, family members, but also may change them, outgrow them, learn new one.
      People used to believe that diabetes can be a hereditary disease. Now, we know it is rather a question of wrong food habits (which are 'hereditary', but nurtured behaviour).
      We believed diseases are coded in our DNA. Now we know the environment can change our DNA, we can even repair our DNA.

    • @AthenaLundCO
      @AthenaLundCO 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      The research has concluded that even if you have a sociopathic brain (no empathy part), and that child was higly loved and nurtured, they won't develop "evilness" - they can learn to be caring. Tho they will probably never feel real love.

  • @christineboone2850
    @christineboone2850 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    This is such a relatable story, and one that happens to so many women. My own story was similar in some respects, and I remember feeling that I wished that the realtor in my story had been able to be more compassionate. She sold a home to my husband and me at the same time she was working to find a home for him and his girlfriend. It still boggles my mind.

    • @chingreen4221
      @chingreen4221 ปีที่แล้ว

      Just wow. People are so wicked.

  • @coribuchanan6947
    @coribuchanan6947 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Oh how i could've been as lucky as you with these amazing parents and people in your life...we're not all so fortunate

  • @paislitaaa
    @paislitaaa 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    A friend of a friend found out her husband was living a double life by googling his name and baby shower invites popped up on. They were baby shower invites to his baby shower with his girlfriend.

  • @TB-bv1vr
    @TB-bv1vr 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This is pretty common, it’s sad but it’s nothing out of the ordinary.

  • @ash12317
    @ash12317 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love that psychologist 🙌. She's everywhere

    • @lovewhitey2027
      @lovewhitey2027 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      ash yes she’s on YT she is brilliant 🗣🙏🏻

  • @courtneyraiyn-eshaiyn7815
    @courtneyraiyn-eshaiyn7815 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I've been through a very similar experience and I am still trying to recover...a year later I'm still having PTSD from everything while he lives with his happy new wife & 7 month old baby. Yeah...sociopaths are so evil.

    • @pamspencer5733
      @pamspencer5733 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Courtney Shaine He needs new narc supply..Don't take it personally! Happens to the best of us.He is truly numb,sick,to be pitied..Don't let this define you,heal.Success is greatest revenge!

  • @joecabrera3106
    @joecabrera3106 6 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    first of all i dont want to defend this fuy but i know alot of people who are married and one needs a green card and they have live together for a long time and they have 2 or 3 kids and they have there ups and downs like any couple , i dont think is about the green card is about cheating

    • @jaclynisveracious
      @jaclynisveracious 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Joe Cabrera they are two separate issues, yes. He still used her to get the green card and cheated.

    • @joecabrera3106
      @joecabrera3106 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Jaclyn M your right but it almost feel like they had a perfect life until he wanted to cheat , green card go's right in with house mortgage and baby and moving and visa to travel but we can assumed that that was he's plan lol and maybe your right

    • @jaclynisveracious
      @jaclynisveracious 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Joe Cabrera well he clearly doesn’t respect the green card his ex-wife gave him, because he cheated with multiple women.

    • @jessicamarie8299
      @jessicamarie8299 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Fast forward this guy is now legal here and is getting married to a Latina woman. Typical Latinos who only use women for green card once they get it they are gone.

  • @Michael60322
    @Michael60322 6 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Hahaha the woman in the back of the peraon being interviewed looks so unammused!

  • @kaylastormprincess3676
    @kaylastormprincess3676 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Sadly, makes me think of my mother. She eventually got out, after over 30 years of exposing her family to a monster.

  • @XoxGlambertXox
    @XoxGlambertXox 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I read Jen waites book in hours. Less then 5 at least. It was incredible addicting, thought provoking and gut wrenching. It was terrifying as she unraveled his lies. Definitely recommend her book. Still think about it till this day.

    • @alexanderwalle3568
      @alexanderwalle3568 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Sometimes every page was a problem; a lot of these people, though, want to come here to work, to make money; you can't bash them for that, really, it's the same situation they would face in their home country which apparently sucks worse than ours.

  • @sofiaornellas9243
    @sofiaornellas9243 6 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    Many men cheat like that!

    • @sofiaornellas9243
      @sofiaornellas9243 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Orange8763153 no, we are saint and pure🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @bobpowers9637
      @bobpowers9637 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Everyone’s got a life a choices which creates their individual world. Plenty of nice guys and nice girls who want love. Trust your instinct

    • @habituallinestepper2883
      @habituallinestepper2883 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Orange8763153 People cheat.

    • @Crgb777
      @Crgb777 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Statistically men cheat more than women, just Google it.

  • @gracebe235
    @gracebe235 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    There must be something in the upbringing of children (both men & women), that promotes this sort of behavior when they grow up. I think that when they are raised with a ‘sense of entitlement’, that is by far the biggest indicator of someone who feels ‘justified’ in lying about their sleeping around......they are, after all, ENTITLED!

    • @huhwah5387
      @huhwah5387 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      No typically they don't get the attention from THE PARENTS who are supposed to teach and love them, so they develop a constant need to be appreciated.

    • @RG-iw7py
      @RG-iw7py 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Grace Be and Jim Frank Narcissist are spoiled children or children whose needs were not met so they turn into 'survival mode' and for the rest of their life pray on others for a 'narcissistic supply'.

    • @bookbag6432
      @bookbag6432 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Crazy because my psych teacher told me her brother is a narcissist. he's conned at least 5 women out of hundred of thousands of dollars and has been divorced 5 times. She finds it very strange as growing up he was only a year younger and she said her parents treated them both very well but he always resented their parents.

  • @kristenlemmon5152
    @kristenlemmon5152 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Seriously love Dr. Ramani❤️

  • @cristinalaura
    @cristinalaura 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    I married someone like that and I still would love a media to tell other people what I went through. How would I go about writing a book like you Jen?