@Rebecca Pemberton . Have you explored all your possible sexual dimensions or exhaustively played with the limits of physical intimacy, utilising all your senses including whatever spiritual sense you may have? I'm just curious how one comes to the conclusion that one is asexual.. many people have to activate their sexual energy in some way and this can take alot of exploration.
That is just how men think you can either take it or leave it. You calling the immature is not going to change the fact that when you reach a certain age men are not going to pay much attention unless you look 22
@@queenbutterfly4888 that’s not true. You’ve succumbed to this belief because you accept it when men like this say it. That’s how they may see it … who cares. Plenty of men and women see beauty, appeal, and value in others for a whole plethora of reasons besides their age. Tom apparently just looks at age.
I'm a men and I don't agree that guys find way younger women attractive. I never look at women who are (or seem to be) much younger that me. Even if she is 5-7 years younger, it's too much for me. I'm simply not interested at all.
Very interesting- appreciate your response & I’m glad to hear there are some men who think like this. I see a lot of men my age (mostly married!) ogling VERY young girls 12-14. What do you think causes adult men to behave this way?
You are very rare. I was sitting behind an older man (around 80) in the train yesterday. He was with his wife and they both looked so nice and sweet. There was a girl getting of the train (she wasn’t more then 18) wearing a low cut sundress. He was staring so much and I felt so disgusted. Maybe men are designed like this but it felt so inappropriate.
This type of thinking irks me so much cuz there’s such a big focus on fertility but then these same men treat their children and family like shit and run from their responsibilities as fathers. Nature also gave u a brain and intelligence for a reason dude
Beauty is not about age.It is about how well you take care of yourself.There are some beautiful older ladies even the young guys ca n't resist.They look years younger than their real age.I know someone in mid sixties dating a fifty year old and it is not about money because he takes care of her just as if she were a younger lady.
C'mon. It's bullshit. You've never seen an ugly 22 year old? or a hot 35 year old. Who would you rather have Jessica Alba at 40 or some over weight bad hygiene having 22 year old? It's not always about the number.
It's not as important as men want to claim. Looks don't keep ppl around. Looks don't equal health or mental/ emotional stability or even fertility, especially not these days. "No longer sexy to the average person"... we don't need to be sexy to the average person & many ppl already know that they're not going to be. Most women want to be desired & appreciated by ONE person & maintain a healthy, lasting relationship with them, NOT everyone else. The term "sexual market value" with the idea that a person's worth is defined by how many ppl want to sleep with them is absurd to me. What that does is brainwash young ppl into thinking s3x is the only thing that matters which fuels hookup culture even more. It makes ppl overly reliant on outside sources for validation by using s3x. It's like saying "your worth as a human is reliant on how well you can do on OF & how quickly you can rack up a body count." No.
This information goes against the narrative of romantic love, she is a romantic at heart. ❤️ But this info is half truth, the other half is men fall deeper in love with the person, her personal qualities, us men develop "wife goggles", we see women as beautiful even as the physical decline. What Tom is speaking is the attraction phase at first, that last maybe 3 years at most.
Be interesting if they spoke about partners picking someone that looks one or the other is punching above their weight. Some partners are both aesthetically BOTH beautiful and some one is better than the other. Lisa in my opinion Is a beautiful woman as a woman her husband wouldn’t turn my head walking down the street. If I was a dude I’d notice Lisa. Tom is like the radical geek a pretty woman would crush on but not because of looks but radical mindset and confidence yes.
I'm a woman that doesn't go 4 years older as I've gotten older. I've dated mostly younger men younger than 4 yrs difference. Also, it isn't just the ability to produce - progesterone (which is connected to fertility) plays a huge role. Even older women post childbearing years who have higher progesterone can attract men over the ones who are low in progesterone. Also, older men want the youth to keep themselves feeling younger. It isn't only "childbearing" at work. Some of it is unhealed conditioning from eons. We also use our innate wiring as an excuse to not make conscious "human" choices and only going by our innate - nature driving - traits. I've seen many use the book Sex at Dawn as a way to use that info as an excuse to not make conscious choices. It's been detrimental in some ways. Our job is to evolve here. IMHO
You're a wise woman, Lisa, and whilst I think you've got a long time yet before you're the 'bag of wrinkles' it's great to value ourselves for all the other attributes we have. I've seen your art on IG and it's absolutely incredible.
Uh.. not wise whatsoever. She’s been gaslit into believing her “market value” runs out when Tom tells her it does. This is gaslighting and very very sad.
@@sunnygirl9691 Look, you just don’t go around assuming things about people you don’t even know, okay? Gossip is horrible and toxic. Now, information about sexual market value has actually been widely and credibly researched, and what they’re discussing in the video ARE indeed the findings. As brutal as they might sound at first. I’m a woman myself, and all I can say is- Despite the research, there are so many more facets to life, love and beauty than what the evidence shows, I just believe the research has not been properly integrated well. Hence red pill dating culture. Not that the facts are wrong, it’s just not the complete truth about things. Because we do see where people go against the supposed ‘evidence’ of market value, and that needs to be accounted for. I just don’t like it when you said that about Tom, because I find him to be one of the most loyal, loving husbands ever to his wife (and there’s PLENTY of evidence online to prove this, you need only search up their names to see just how much he supports her and talks about her with such high regard), and your comment is just NOT it. I would LOVE to have a husband like Tom is, in the future! He appreciates hard facts, and that’s the thing about him you don’t like? Lol. And Lisa is one badass woman, she’s 100% not the kind that would ever get deceived by anyone, especially after everything she’s been through. Please open up your perspective and learn to see through people more clearly and clarify your assumptions more thoroughly. That will serve you well.
I think we're turned on by being the center of our man's attention.. when the natural instincts jump in, ND theirs younger girls around looking for that attention... why do we have to be put in the back seat for boundaries and respect. If it was a younger male... we wouldn't be expected to treat them any way if our husband felt insecure.
I thought about this all day and it made me feel really sad. I love this channel but usually I feel invigorated after listening, this has the opposite effect. I realise that it's not all roses but the content was grim .
Please don’t feel that way. He is describing himself and other immature minded men. This is a lot of men but not all men AND certainly doesn’t describe a true loving connection/relationship. He has cheapened his own marriage and embarrassed himself and his wife.
@@yvonnewright366 I stopped the video after the first few minutes. This guy is very ignorant. He thinks he speaks for all men, but he's only speaking about himself. I've been married for a very long time and my husband is still sexually attracted to me and vice versa. We are also still very much in love. That guy in this video is messed up in the head. He is floating around like an untethered helium balloon, blowing in the wind this way and that way, and while he thinks he's choosing his direction, he is really just terribly lost. He will inevitably get stuck in a tree or tangled in a power-line, lol. Seriously, he is wrong. Men have romantic love just like women and it isn't dependent on a specific age. Ask any older happily married man and he will tell you the same. They still have eyes for their wives and always will. Most men are not shallow and stupid like this guy. By the way, this guy is in a freaking dream world if he believes women stop finding younger guys sexy, lol. Someone either fed him a bunch of BS or he's just making stuff up. My 70-something mom had a thing for Brad Pitt and always said he was so sexy. Apparently my mom was only supposed to find men in their 70's attractive. This guy is a total fool. Don't let him bring you down, even for a second. That boy is lost and will no doubt be wandering around confused and alone for a long time to come with those idiotic beliefs. I bet women laugh at him behind his back, lol.
There are many women in their 20s that are not attractive, just like there are unattractive 40 year old women. I had waaaaaay more attention in my 30s than my 20s. Explain that.
Think this is a matter of hot vs beautiful. Being hot attracts the polyamorous men, being beautiful is substantially more sustainable, lasts longer, and attracts the monogamous men. Joe Rogan has a great video about it if you guys are interested just search “Joe Rogan hot vs beautiful”
I don’t see how age matters, I’m female I don’t look at age. I find anyone that I’m in sync with attractive, someone that resembles a part of me.. someone when I look at their eyes I see a reflection of a part of me. Usualy we tend to have some simailr features and it’s so cool to see that’s. Sometimes it’s just the face sometimes it’s the body shape. But overall there’s a resemblance
What if we lived in a world where our value system wasnt based on our base desires alone or how we were programed by nature. What if the more attractive quality was our ability to override our base desires by our moral code. I feel like God desires that deeply for us and there is a true freedom in seeing behind the curtain of worldly passing things. Then that moment we arent powerful by natural worldly means it doesnt devastate us because our worth and value was never fully dependent on that but of God. If you believe and invest your identity in Him this world power system collapses and you can laugh at the days to come with actual joy. Deep unfading beautiful joy.
Be interesting if they spoke about partners picking someone that looks one or the other is punching above their weight. Some partners are both aesthetically BOTH beautiful and some one is better than the other. Lisa in my opinion Is a beautiful woman as a woman her husband wouldn’t turn my head walking down the street. If I was a dude I’d notice Lisa. Tom is like the radical geek a pretty woman would crush on but not because of looks but radical mindset and confidence yes.
I don’t see the older men in my life find younger women more attractive like I’m a way that they want to have sex with them . I think both genders just see younger healthier looking humans as interesting and cute to look at , just like seeing a piece of art. The older u get it just becomes more individual because the features and certain characteristics come out much stronger. But if ur someone’s soul mate u will find that old person much more sexy and interesting to look at the a young 20 yr old… cuz they will resemble you , u will see urself in them , in their flaws.. in the details, the skin tone, the body shape. And all those kind stuff. We instinctively pick up on them. Babies are much easily cute universally cuz their immature , haven’t developed their personality. But a baby can’t be super sexy. As u age u kinda get uglier but also sexier and more unique.. u see it the most when it comes to the private parts of ppl. U can find it ugly or the most sexy .. it all will depends how compatible and familiar it is to you..
I see it as god made certain things be purposely ugly- sexy.. so only if it’s ur real match u will love it. You will be in awe. In shock. Little to do with age..
Tom, your insecurity regarding your intelligence is interesting because I was talking to a guy about you and he commented on how smart he thought you were.
Well as Afro Latina youth does not stop sexuality and fertility goes pretty far into the 50 age range … men and women all have wide age attraction men need to balance themselves better because everything is not about physical attraction but taking care of self and beauty is important not just for physical gain but for health liking younger women is really an excuse and cheap satisfaction men just have not had to ever hold themselves accountable
If you are calling a few hundred thousand years worth of evolutionary biology a cheap satisfaction when it comes to men then I'm fairly sure you also haven't got any problems with dating homeless, jobless and futureless men with nothing else to show but only a heart of gold? Do you also believe that women seeking for a reliable, financially and carrier wise stable confident man 'a provider' is also a cheap satisfaction? How many of your friend married a homeless guy because of his true spirit and kind heart?
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How important of a role do you think aesthetics plays in most relationships?
very much.looks make 40% of your SMV then comes 30% dick 10% height and then 20% pERsonality(dark triad)
@Rebecca Pemberton . Have you explored all your possible sexual dimensions or exhaustively played with the limits of physical intimacy, utilising all your senses including whatever spiritual sense you may have? I'm just curious how one comes to the conclusion that one is asexual.. many people have to activate their sexual energy in some way and this can take alot of exploration.
Large percentage
Not sure why they would be saying her beauty will “go away”. People are beautiful at all stages of life. This is immature thinking.
I completely agree!
Do you need help? To fix your broken relationship?
He will definitely help you he have solutions to all problems
That is just how men think you can either take it or leave it. You calling the immature is not going to change the fact that when you reach a certain age men are not going to pay much attention unless you look 22
@@queenbutterfly4888 that’s not true. You’ve succumbed to this belief because you accept it when men like this say it. That’s how they may see it … who cares. Plenty of men and women see beauty, appeal, and value in others for a whole plethora of reasons besides their age. Tom apparently just looks at age.
I'm a men and I don't agree that guys find way younger women attractive. I never look at women who are (or seem to be) much younger that me. Even if she is 5-7 years younger, it's too much for me. I'm simply not interested at all.
Very interesting- appreciate your response & I’m glad to hear there are some men who think like this. I see a lot of men my age (mostly married!) ogling VERY young girls 12-14. What do you think causes adult men to behave this way?
@@sunnygirl9691 I don't know. I don't understand that either.
@@sunnygirl9691 They're pedophiles.
That's coz ur a men and not a man
You are very rare. I was sitting behind an older man (around 80) in the train yesterday. He was with his wife and they both looked so nice and sweet. There was a girl getting of the train (she wasn’t more then 18) wearing a low cut sundress. He was staring so much and I felt so disgusted. Maybe men are designed like this but it felt so inappropriate.
This type of thinking irks me so much cuz there’s such a big focus on fertility but then these same men treat their children and family like shit and run from their responsibilities as fathers. Nature also gave u a brain and intelligence for a reason dude
That’s why I would think that every person is not built the same. So maybe there a percentage of people that would fall
In what they are speaking on
Fun fact I might be the only odd girl! yet I would have to disagree with the first 29 seconds I don’t believe it’s within 4 years of own age ..
“Men enjoy looking at something that turns them on, women enjoy being the turn on.” - touché
Beauty is not about age.It is about how well you take care of yourself.There are some beautiful older ladies even the young guys ca n't resist.They look years younger than their real age.I know someone in mid sixties dating a fifty year old and it is not about money because he takes care of her just as if she were a younger lady.
C'mon. It's bullshit. You've never seen an ugly 22 year old? or a hot 35 year old. Who would you rather have Jessica Alba at 40 or some over weight bad hygiene having 22 year old? It's not always about the number.
Do you need help? To fix your broken relationship?
He will definitely help you he have solutions to all problems
@@Lucy-wp4tx
Sorry but she has a point. Some women look ugly at 22 and some look good at 30.
The average 40 year old doesn’t look like Jessica Alba
It's not as important as men want to claim. Looks don't keep ppl around. Looks don't equal health or mental/ emotional stability or even fertility, especially not these days. "No longer sexy to the average person"... we don't need to be sexy to the average person & many ppl already know that they're not going to be. Most women want to be desired & appreciated by ONE person & maintain a healthy, lasting relationship with them, NOT everyone else.
The term "sexual market value" with the idea that a person's worth is defined by how many ppl want to sleep with them is absurd to me. What that does is brainwash young ppl into thinking s3x is the only thing that matters which fuels hookup culture even more. It makes ppl overly reliant on outside sources for validation by using s3x. It's like saying "your worth as a human is reliant on how well you can do on OF & how quickly you can rack up a body count." No.
Wow he’s so compassionate and respectful towards her and her emotions. So nice to see you both treat each others well.
The way Lisa was looking at Tom when he said about 22 year olds really made me laugh. I'm really looking forward to your book arriving.
Lisa looks uncomfortable and unhappy😟
This information goes against the narrative of romantic love, she is a romantic at heart. ❤️ But this info is half truth, the other half is men fall deeper in love with the person, her personal qualities, us men develop "wife goggles", we see women as beautiful even as the physical decline. What Tom is speaking is the attraction phase at first, that last maybe 3 years at most.
Be interesting if they spoke about partners picking someone that looks one or the other is punching above their weight. Some partners are both aesthetically BOTH beautiful and some one is better than the other. Lisa in my opinion
Is a beautiful woman as a woman her husband wouldn’t turn my head walking down the street. If I was a dude I’d notice Lisa. Tom is like the radical geek a pretty woman would crush on but not because of looks but radical mindset and confidence yes.
2:31
Yes especially women more than men. But at last is the compatibility, chemistry and moral values for a long lasting relationship
I'm a woman that doesn't go 4 years older as I've gotten older. I've dated mostly younger men younger than 4 yrs difference. Also, it isn't just the ability to produce - progesterone (which is connected to fertility) plays a huge role. Even older women post childbearing years who have higher progesterone can attract men over the ones who are low in progesterone.
Also, older men want the youth to keep themselves feeling younger. It isn't only "childbearing" at work. Some of it is unhealed conditioning from eons.
We also use our innate wiring as an excuse to not make conscious "human" choices and only going by our innate - nature driving - traits.
I've seen many use the book Sex at Dawn as a way to use that info as an excuse to not make conscious choices. It's been detrimental in some ways. Our job is to evolve here. IMHO
You're a wise woman, Lisa, and whilst I think you've got a long time yet before you're the 'bag of wrinkles' it's great to value ourselves for all the other attributes we have. I've seen your art on IG and it's absolutely incredible.
Uh.. not wise whatsoever. She’s been gaslit into believing her “market value” runs out when Tom tells her it does. This is gaslighting and very very sad.
@@sunnygirl9691 She's never struck me as a woman to put up with any kind of 💩from anyone.
@@mariarossi6719 but apparently she does She can’t see it.
@@sunnygirl9691 Look, you just don’t go around assuming things about people you don’t even know, okay? Gossip is horrible and toxic.
Now, information about sexual market value has actually been widely and credibly researched, and what they’re discussing in the video ARE indeed the findings. As brutal as they might sound at first. I’m a woman myself, and all I can say is- Despite the research, there are so many more facets to life, love and beauty than what the evidence shows, I just believe the research has not been properly integrated well. Hence red pill dating culture. Not that the facts are wrong, it’s just not the complete truth about things. Because we do see where people go against the supposed ‘evidence’ of market value, and that needs to be accounted for.
I just don’t like it when you said that about Tom, because I find him to be one of the most loyal, loving husbands ever to his wife (and there’s PLENTY of evidence online to prove this, you need only search up their names to see just how much he supports her and talks about her with such high regard), and your comment is just NOT it. I would LOVE to have a husband like Tom is, in the future! He appreciates hard facts, and that’s the thing about him you don’t like? Lol. And Lisa is one badass woman, she’s 100% not the kind that would ever get deceived by anyone, especially after everything she’s been through. Please open up your perspective and learn to see through people more clearly and clarify your assumptions more thoroughly. That will serve you well.
@@shelby3755 hmm that’s not gossip. That’s my opinion.
seems like a dated attitude
Dude is this guy trying to justify looking at young women to his wife? Hella immature
I think we're turned on by being the center of our man's attention.. when the natural instincts jump in, ND theirs younger girls around looking for that attention... why do we have to be put in the back seat for boundaries and respect. If it was a younger male... we wouldn't be expected to treat them any way if our husband felt insecure.
I thought about this all day and it made me feel really sad. I love this channel but usually I feel invigorated after listening, this has the opposite effect. I realise that it's not all roses but the content was grim .
Do you need help? To fix your broken relationship?
He will definitely help you he have solutions to all problems
Please don’t feel that way. He is describing himself and other immature minded men. This is a lot of men but not all men AND certainly doesn’t describe a true loving connection/relationship. He has cheapened his own marriage and embarrassed himself and his wife.
@@sunnygirl9691 correct , I couldn't agree more. It really got to me tho.
@@yvonnewright366 I stopped the video after the first few minutes. This guy is very ignorant. He thinks he speaks for all men, but he's only speaking about himself. I've been married for a very long time and my husband is still sexually attracted to me and vice versa. We are also still very much in love.
That guy in this video is messed up in the head. He is floating around like an untethered helium balloon, blowing in the wind this way and that way, and while he thinks he's choosing his direction, he is really just terribly lost. He will inevitably get stuck in a tree or tangled in a power-line, lol. Seriously, he is wrong. Men have romantic love just like women and it isn't dependent on a specific age. Ask any older happily married man and he will tell you the same. They still have eyes for their wives and always will. Most men are not shallow and stupid like this guy.
By the way, this guy is in a freaking dream world if he believes women stop finding younger guys sexy, lol. Someone either fed him a bunch of BS or he's just making stuff up. My 70-something mom had a thing for Brad Pitt and always said he was so sexy. Apparently my mom was only supposed to find men in their 70's attractive. This guy is a total fool. Don't let him bring you down, even for a second. That boy is lost and will no doubt be wandering around confused and alone for a long time to come with those idiotic beliefs. I bet women laugh at him behind his back, lol.
There are many women in their 20s that are not attractive, just like there are unattractive 40 year old women. I had waaaaaay more attention in my 30s than my 20s. Explain that.
Same here even in my early forties and much better quality of men. Life is different for everyone
How long have you guys been together?
Think this is a matter of hot vs beautiful. Being hot attracts the polyamorous men, being beautiful is substantially more sustainable, lasts longer, and attracts the monogamous men. Joe Rogan has a great video about it if you guys are interested just search “Joe Rogan hot vs beautiful”
This is coming from a 23 year old. Humans have gone against nature in endless aspects. I don’t think this is as fixed as Tom is making it out to be.
th-cam.com/video/PvQrFBOyDs0/w-d-xo.html
Here’s the video link if anyone is interested :)
I don’t see how age matters, I’m female I don’t look at age. I find anyone that I’m in sync with attractive, someone that resembles a part of me.. someone when I look at their eyes I see a reflection of a part of me. Usualy we tend to have some simailr features and it’s so cool to see that’s. Sometimes it’s just the face sometimes it’s the body shape. But overall there’s a resemblance
Honeymoon phase ...choose a mature hubby type...
Um, no.. I actually don't find guys who are younger than me, attractive lol. I actually prefer much older haha ;) like 35yrs-50yrs lol *( I'm 26)
Well Misty thanks for the compliment....I'm 50 and quite fit and handsome Write to me! piusdodiciatyahoodotcom
Yeah - that’s Um, something you should talk to a therapist about. Sometimes that stuff comes from our relationship or lack of with our fathers.
it's seams Tom knows women more them they know themselves :*)
She's his wife?
What if we lived in a world where our value system wasnt based on our base desires alone or how we were programed by nature. What if the more attractive quality was our ability to override our base desires by our moral code. I feel like God desires that deeply for us and there is a true freedom in seeing behind the curtain of worldly passing things. Then that moment we arent powerful by natural worldly means it doesnt devastate us because our worth and value was never fully dependent on that but of God. If you believe and invest your identity in Him this world power system collapses and you can laugh at the days to come with actual joy. Deep unfading beautiful joy.
I've fallen in love with men that are not traditionally handsome
Be interesting if they spoke about partners picking someone that looks one or the other is punching above their weight. Some partners are both aesthetically BOTH beautiful and some one is better than the other. Lisa in my opinion
Is a beautiful woman as a woman her husband wouldn’t turn my head walking down the street. If I was a dude I’d notice Lisa. Tom is like the radical geek a pretty woman would crush on but not because of looks but radical mindset and confidence yes.
I don’t see the older men in my life find younger women more attractive like I’m a way that they want to have sex with them . I think both genders just see younger healthier looking humans as interesting and cute to look at , just like seeing a piece of art. The older u get it just becomes more individual because the features and certain characteristics come out much stronger. But if ur someone’s soul mate u will find that old person much more sexy and interesting to look at the a young 20 yr old… cuz they will resemble you , u will see urself in them , in their flaws.. in the details, the skin tone, the body shape. And all those kind stuff. We instinctively pick up on them.
Babies are much easily cute universally cuz their immature , haven’t developed their personality. But a baby can’t be super sexy. As u age u kinda get uglier but also sexier and more unique.. u see it the most when it comes to the private parts of ppl. U can find it ugly or the most sexy .. it all will depends how compatible and familiar it is to you..
I see it as god made certain things be purposely ugly- sexy.. so only if it’s ur real match u will love it. You will be in awe. In shock. Little to do with age..
Tom, your insecurity regarding your intelligence is interesting because I was talking to a guy about you and he commented on how smart he thought you were.
Looks matter
What about gay people? Are gay men also only attracted to 22-year-olds?
Yes, 22 year old men, not women
I’m 37 but everyone thinks I’m in my mid 20s because of my body type and Asian skin. Is it ACTUAL age or the age you APPEAR?
🤔Hmmm! Wow! The cringe theory book!😬
Wow this is terrible material. Very reductive way to see "people" as objects.
*Investing in crypto now should be in every wise individuals list, in some months time you'll be ecstatic with the decision you made today.*
I wanted to trade Crypto but got discouraged by the fluctuations in price
Well as Afro Latina youth does not stop sexuality and fertility goes pretty far into the 50 age range … men and women all have wide age attraction men need to balance themselves better because everything is not about physical attraction but taking care of self and beauty is important not just for physical gain but for health liking younger women is really an excuse and cheap satisfaction men just have not had to ever hold themselves accountable
I love that fertility is still going strong well into the fifties.
If you are calling a few hundred thousand years worth of evolutionary biology a cheap satisfaction when it comes to men then I'm fairly sure you also haven't got any problems with dating homeless, jobless and futureless men with nothing else to show but only a heart of gold?
Do you also believe that women seeking for a reliable, financially and carrier wise stable confident man 'a provider' is also a cheap satisfaction?
How many of your friend married a homeless guy because of his true spirit and kind heart?
Very helpful, as always 🙏🏻❤️🩹🌹