Transcript available on Patreon www.patreon.com/posts/weaponised-is-115468927 and Substack darrenfmagee.substack.com/p/weaponised-accusations-the-process
People often excuse these accusers by saying you just need to disprove the accusation or are giving wrong impressions or that the accuser doesn't know any better. But when you actively want to disprove the accusation and/or try to reason with the accuser they do all the mental gymnastics necessary to sabotage any proof. This proofs that they are very aware that they are lying.
Darren, you are so astute. What an unusual angle you have discussed today. Thank you again for dissecting and exposing the framework of this common tactic of the conscienceless narcissist. Touché.
Really good description of how these people work. It can feel like the whole world is against you because in reality the world that they've created around you is. Stand strong, don't been drawn into people pleasing to prove your value. Use this experiance to grow and to be comfortable in your own skin.
Wow spot on! All of this happened to me with my narc sister-in-law. For years I dealt with her jealousy toward me by ostracizing me from family activities and I just put up with it, never knew what to do .... but then last year she took things to a whole new level of narcissistic abuse after my husband received a health diagnosis of early stages Alzheimers. My sister-in-law became obsessed with directing all of my husband's health decisions, and she isn't even a doctor. Kept pushing and expecting my husband to get involved in a "clinical trial" for Alzheimers but he didn't want to do that. And when she found out that he wasn't interested in any clinical trials she got angry; and he even told her that he needed to "take a break" from her too. Well, that didn't stop her. She kept calling and injecting herself into our lives. And she continued to insist that her brother do things her way and she was even picking out his hobbies -- that's when we decided to 'block' her number since she wouldn't stop being so pushy. Oh my, she went ballistic when she learned that she was blocked. That's when she began her smear campaign against ME by calling our son and accused me of "holding my husband HOSTAGE" and not allowing him to talk to her. That's when my husband called her and confronted her about calling our son and sowing seeds of doubt about me, but all she did was defend herself and scream at him. He hung up on her and they haven't talked since. That was just over a year ago. She's too proud to apologize, but continues to whine to other family members that she's been victimized, and other family members have come to her defense. All she had to do when my husband called her was to apologize, but she refused to do that. Now she's claiming that she was wronged. Crazy stuff. She's still blocked from my husband's phone, and life has been so peaceful without her in it. We don't miss her toxic drama one bit. Take care, dear reader :)
Strategies to combat this hideous tactic would be both absolutely splendid and appreciated!! I look forward to hearing your wisdom on this topic in your next video! ❤❤❤
Wow - for me too. You absolutely nailed it Darren! Until you’ve experienced it, you’ll never believe it could happen. It could take a lifetime to see & feel it, especially from close family or friends you thought you knew. I’m now 72 1/2. I’m feeling it now. Disturbing but acceptable, knowing it wasn’t me, not even close - it was them. Great content and delivery!
Thank you for your podcasts. I've learnt so much about myself and gained confidence in the process. Throughout my life I've encountered many narcissists, several withing my family. I'm in the autistic spectrum and found, indeed, still find, life confusing. Narcissists complicated things. Recognizing how some people operate, the tactics they use and think. It has been empowering. I've learnt about my own short comings and how to manage those. I've found ways to cope. The past two years have been very happy for me as I've cut my contact with my family and I can see the reactions to bring me back into the fold. It makes me feel for once, the person who is one step ahead. I remind myself, I can never "get ahead" or "have payback", so I need to accept things and just go along on my own.
this is an amazing topic. I need someyhing to describe the "please explain yourself" demands of truly manipulative people who have no intention of hearing, much less understwnding, a factual answer
It really depends on the specifics of that interaction and the interpersonal dynamics at play during said interaction. *It could be in asking a person to explain themselves, they're subtly implying that there is something odd about the person and that requires further explanation to be understandable to others. The goal is grooming future victims for long term narcissistic abuse by first testing their tolerance for such things.* _It may be to put someone into a more defensive position during a discussion ... where they now feel the need to defend their OWN reasoning and hopefully not notice/forget to mention the narcissist's rather unattractive qualities or expectations._ *I could even be one small piece in a much larger puzzle of chronic passive aggressive gaslighting; the motivation being power and control over a victim by making them feel abnormal or "crazy" though repeatedly asking them to explain themselves. This can be used to isolate victims and keep them insecure so they won't leave.* _It could also be a verbal diversionary tactic to redirect focus onto somebody else, deflecting negative attention away from the narcissist while keeping that person spinning in circles. The narcissistic aim would be to wear someone down while using them as a human lightning rod during the discussion._ *It can also be a public shaming tactic, especially when calmy spoken using polite language, hoping to make it appear that the person they're with is the strange and irrational one (and making the narcissist appear to be the level headed one). Narcissistic forms of psychological sabotage are fairly common during major holidays and special events ... it tends to be the people who always seem to have a big fight right before arriving.* _Communal narcissists may also pick their victims based on how easily they can "push their buttons" in public -- i.e. eliciting strong negative mental states using emotional manipulation tactics. Narcissists may do this to cultivate frustrated confusion in their victims by making them jump through hoops which never yield successful communication or understanding._ _The objective here is to make a victim look like they're the bad guy_ _--- that way, the narcissist can complain about their victim to others and speak poorly about them behind their back. This can produce a double effect of enabling the narcissist to then form "flying monkeys" and use them against their victims; because when outsiders witness a strong reaction from victims of narcissistic abuse, it may seem that they're be overreacting to the narcissist._ *It may appear to others that a victim is the abuser & the abuser is a victim.* etc. etc. etc. (I'm trying my best to keep it short here 😄)
OUTSTANDING! I took Notes down on Paper! This is the Worst behavior of a very sick mind. My Narc was a NAVY COMMANDER. I held our family together for 25 years, always hoping and believing we could make it NOT to tear our children up in divorce court. I turned a blind eye many times. This is ACCURATE. Torturous in the end….. However.,,YEAH IM STRONG, IM SMART, I found my voice… and said, “ You are Not more superior than me! You are Not more intelligent than me, You Cannot control me, And I can stand on my own 2 feet w: LOVE in my heart for family and friends! Praise the Lord for His fighting for me in Court!!!
Excellent video! I would love for you to do a video on how to manage false accusations. It's becoming so common these days. Therefore, it's important to have strategies for when it happens. I've experienced being falsely accused of many things, and it's a painful experience.
The lady above who said never to give a fear-based response is right. Remember that many people have quite good judgement and will either dismiss the nonsense or at the very least not go all in with the fabrications. Of course, if you can avoid the liar and their flying monkeys, do. If a third party starts being weird with you, ask if everything is ok. They'll probably say it is, but if it's appropriate, make an offer that they can always get in touch if they'd like a chat. You may actually be projecting, and they may have worries if their own and don't know about any accusations, anyway. If someone calls you on what they've been told you did, perhaps try 'I don't know why anyone would say something like that because it's really horrible and not true, but thank you for letting me know that someone's being mean behind my back; I appreciate your honesty'. Keep an even keel and a gentle hand on the emotional tiller.
My vulnerable narcissist husband accused me of having an incestuous relationship with my autistic son. The truly striking thing about that accusation was that he only made it to my 11 year old granddaughter. He didn’t accuse me before any adults who would have been able to stop such a vile thing from happening. My granddaughter was able to see through him and actually recorded him saying those vile things and sent the recording to me. I knew he was capable of making false accusations but I was still just devastated at the level he was willing to sink to who he was willing to take down with him. He was a “minister” by the way.
Wow…they never cease to surprise you with the made up narratives in their own head. Have to wonder if it was projection of what he wanted to do….? They usually accuse of the same things they did or wanted to do. Just my thoughts…
A family member has to face her narc in court. He’s a master manipulator, gaslighter and has accused her of the violence he inflicts. Mr. Magee, do you have any resources to present in court? This dangerous narc has the whole law enforcement fooled, my relative desperately needs help. Please and thank you.
I notice that my daughter uses this technique on me any time I Ask her to change her behavior or do her chores or other tasks. I tell her the behavior that needs to be canged and why. Then she starts listing several things that she feels I do that are inappropriate. Typically untrue or twisting the truth. She feals like with her attack she has won and therefore she can continue her bad behavior, simply because she is good at shit talking. I stand firm and insist that she behaves appropriately, but she reverts back to her previous behavior in a day or two when she thinks I am not paying attention. I think it is a mistake for me to listen to her attack my behavior and justify myself when I am trying to correct her continued misbehavior. After listening to this video and thinking about the technique my daughter is using to justify her bad behavior and intimate me. In the future I am not going to give her the opportunity to twist the conversation. It is not appropriate for anyone to verbaly atack someone for doing the responsible thing in guiding their children to behave and do their chores.
Thank you for your work, Darren, and YES, Please. It will be beneficial to learn some strategies for managing narc behaviour and false accusations at the workplace, as this is not covered on the internet very much but is very common.THX
These kinds of coercive accusations were exactly what I experienced in my covertly narcissistic abusive relationship. They happened after I ended the relationship but also occurred during it, with attempts to control my clothing, hair (asking me "lovingly" to keep my hair long because he liked that on women), and social media usage-all of which I rejected as I continued doing my own thing, thinking he was simply insecure and needed time to feel secure in the relationship. When it happened after the relationship, I initially perceived it as "romantic insecurity" or "being very hurt," but it was just more emotional, mental, and psychological abuse piled on with vague, exaggerated and projective things.
How do they know how to do this? All these textbook behaviours, it's strange how they do this and understand how to manipulate... Or even want to. I know it's a shame based disorder but I don't understand why they don't just sit in a hole and leave everyone alone.
Their brain feels like it has to do these things in order to protect them. They only feel good about themselves when they feel like they're better than others. If they just left others alone.. it would expose them to themselves.. and it would leave them in a state of worthlessness and hopelessness. A narcissist that doesn't feed off of others quickly goes from "I'm the best" to "I'm worthless."
I truly believe it is a dark force within. They sold out to that force and gave into all the evil practices to destroy everyone because they were destroyed. They need to repent and turn from these ways. Then they could be free from the darkness within. In my humble opinion..
my father is a Sadistic Psychopath!!! i have spent my whole adult life studying healing practices and therapies and focusing on forgiveness yet now i see my efforts to give love and my sincere care was wasted on a cruel sick man too stubborn to heal himself
How to defend yourself from accusations would be nice because they love it and the wilder the accusations are the easier people tend to believe them. Besides, the victim is always outnumbered.
Could you speak a little more on how the narcissists accuse and punish their children? How far they will go to punish their children, for something they had never done.
"The process is the punishment" is an already-established phrase, but it's not a great phrase. "Punishment" implies the victim is bad, did something bad, or otherwise deserves what is being done to them. "The process is the abuse" would be a better phrase
Agreed. I also feel this way about the term 'Reactive Abuse' because most of that is the victim trying to defend themselves from the actual abuse directed at them from their bully abuser. I feel like that term should be changed to 'Reactive Defense' but I guess these terms are pretty much set now, sadly.
@@louhortonsculpture Yes, thank you! Now to figure out how to get the label changed, other than just using the term that way until it might catch on, which could take a century or two. When someone is saying something mean to us or doing something mean to us - THEM being abusive - for us to say or do anything in response then becoming labeled 'abuse' is flat out wrong, and a way to render us mute. It's a Reactive Defense, or even Reactive Response, NOT Reactive Abuse. I do believe, however, that if taken to extremes, then yes, there can be cases of actual Reactive Abuse, but most of us are going no further than trying to respond defensively and correct wrongful things said or done to us. The way things are labeled right now, it makes us afraid to even utter a peep in defense without getting a nasty label stuck on us - which is just the way bullies like it.
I take care of a narc's dying mother. He messes up her food and pills and then accuses me of screwing up. I'm so done with this shit, I almost just left the other day. and he then tells on himself by making little comments like "...driving me crazy..." Yeah, he's trying to drive me crazy, but I know what he is. Pity his fiance, unless maybe she is a bigger narc than he is and will get a taste of his own medicine.
Prayers for you Daphne I hope you can get away from him. They are evil to the core they never see it or change. They will always blame you for their F ups!!! Ew I can’t stand narcs. I got rid of mine 3.75 years ago best decision I ever made !
I lived in a small town where I was accused of being a slut. This was done on purpose to encourage the local sex pests to assault me. I had to move after I heard a stranger outside testing my door locks to my house in the middle of the night.
Do you think that killing one twin in the womb with a medical procedure for down syndrome then the stillbirth of that tiwn later with the live twin and the post natal hormones can cause so much grief, guilt and trauma to make a woman into a narcissist?
There are no superior people. There are people who have tact, use honesty, class, focus on themselves, and handle beefing with others in secret. This is superior behavior or behavior that does not create conflict. Challenges are choices for people. Challenging behavior is antagonistic in nature. There are plenty of superior here in America who do not start mess, are not insensitive, and who do not have pesky behavior like challenging others.
Its always interesting to read comments from people who accuse others of being narcissistic when they them selves are most likely the narcissistic or are also a narcissist. Amd then there's the enablers and people who are clearly part of the problem. They never hold them selves accountable and everything is alwats someone elses fault and they've never done any wrong. The comments under these videos are full of these people
Nice video, I'm still struggling with the end of my 7-year relationship. My significant other, who I considered to be the love of my life, left me a month ago, and I can't seem to shake the constant thoughts of him. Despite my efforts to bring him back into my life, nothing has worked, and I feel frustrated and hopeless. I've tried to move on, but my heart still longs for him, and I don't see myself with anyone else. I apologize for sharing this here, but I just can't seem to stop missing him.
It's hard to let go of someone you love; I went through a similar experience when my 12-year relationship ended. I tried everything to get him back, and eventually I had to turn to a spiritual counselor for assistance.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
Transcript available on Patreon www.patreon.com/posts/weaponised-is-115468927 and Substack darrenfmagee.substack.com/p/weaponised-accusations-the-process
People often excuse these accusers by saying you just need to disprove the accusation or are giving wrong impressions or that the accuser doesn't know any better. But when you actively want to disprove the accusation and/or try to reason with the accuser they do all the mental gymnastics necessary to sabotage any proof.
This proofs that they are very aware that they are lying.
Since infancy 😉
Social media isn't always very social. It's often where mean-spirited people go to enjoy eviscerating others as entertainment.
So true....
Darren, you are so astute. What an unusual angle you have discussed today. Thank you again for dissecting and exposing the framework of this common tactic of the conscienceless narcissist. Touché.
@@kristinmeyer489 Facts!
@@Pamela-k5uothers who troll are making light of things when people are getting too serious. I hope my magical new religion can help in that aim.
Tons of narcs on social media all about look at meeeee. Ew. They troll to get toxic energy kind of kool aid to drink.
Really good description of how these people work. It can feel like the whole world is against you because in reality the world that they've created around you is. Stand strong, don't been drawn into people pleasing to prove your value. Use this experiance to grow and to be comfortable in your own skin.
Wow! That's so accurate. Thanks for sharing
YES PLEASE put something together to help manage being weaponized by Some1!! Thank you!!
Wow spot on! All of this happened to me with my narc sister-in-law. For years I dealt with her jealousy toward me by ostracizing me from family activities and I just put up with it, never knew what to do .... but then last year she took things to a whole new level of narcissistic abuse after my husband received a health diagnosis of early stages Alzheimers. My sister-in-law became obsessed with directing all of my husband's health decisions, and she isn't even a doctor. Kept pushing and expecting my husband to get involved in a "clinical trial" for Alzheimers but he didn't want to do that. And when she found out that he wasn't interested in any clinical trials she got angry; and he even told her that he needed to "take a break" from her too. Well, that didn't stop her. She kept calling and injecting herself into our lives. And she continued to insist that her brother do things her way and she was even picking out his hobbies -- that's when we decided to 'block' her number since she wouldn't stop being so pushy. Oh my, she went ballistic when she learned that she was blocked. That's when she began her smear campaign against ME by calling our son and accused me of "holding my husband HOSTAGE" and not allowing him to talk to her. That's when my husband called her and confronted her about calling our son and sowing seeds of doubt about me, but all she did was defend herself and scream at him. He hung up on her and they haven't talked since. That was just over a year ago. She's too proud to apologize, but continues to whine to other family members that she's been victimized, and other family members have come to her defense. All she had to do when my husband called her was to apologize, but she refused to do that. Now she's claiming that she was wronged. Crazy stuff. She's still blocked from my husband's phone, and life has been so peaceful without her in it. We don't miss her toxic drama one bit. Take care, dear reader :)
You showed much courage there. Keep it going.
@@simonandrews4355 Thank you! :)
Strategies to combat this hideous tactic would be both absolutely splendid and appreciated!! I look forward to hearing your wisdom on this topic in your next video! ❤❤❤
Wow - for me too. You absolutely nailed it Darren! Until you’ve experienced it, you’ll never believe it could happen. It could take a lifetime to see & feel it, especially from close family or friends you thought you knew.
I’m now 72 1/2. I’m feeling it now. Disturbing but acceptable, knowing it wasn’t me, not even close - it was them. Great content and delivery!
Thank you for your podcasts. I've learnt so much about myself and gained confidence in the process. Throughout my life I've encountered many narcissists, several withing my family. I'm in the autistic spectrum and found, indeed, still find, life confusing. Narcissists complicated things. Recognizing how some people operate, the tactics they use and think. It has been empowering. I've learnt about my own short comings and how to manage those. I've found ways to cope. The past two years have been very happy for me as I've cut my contact with my family and I can see the reactions to bring me back into the fold. It makes me feel for once, the person who is one step ahead. I remind myself, I can never "get ahead" or "have payback", so I need to accept things and just go along on my own.
Spot on Darren. It’s been going on in my life for years now. Threatening, intimidation, gang stalking and so on. Those people have criminal minds.
When you develop a strong sense of identity and security in who you are, they lose control over you. Stay strong and work on developing self love.
Yes please 🙏 to managing weaponized accusations strategy
Please do a „how to defend against weaponised accusations“
this is an amazing topic. I need someyhing to describe the "please explain yourself" demands of truly manipulative people who have no intention of hearing, much less understwnding, a factual answer
It really depends on the specifics of that interaction and the interpersonal dynamics at play during said interaction.
*It could be in asking a person to explain themselves, they're subtly implying that there is something odd about the person and that requires further explanation to be understandable to others. The goal is grooming future victims for long term narcissistic abuse by first testing their tolerance for such things.*
_It may be to put someone into a more defensive position during a discussion ... where they now feel the need to defend their OWN reasoning and hopefully not notice/forget to mention the narcissist's rather unattractive qualities or expectations._
*I could even be one small piece in a much larger puzzle of chronic passive aggressive gaslighting; the motivation being power and control over a victim by making them feel abnormal or "crazy" though repeatedly asking them to explain themselves. This can be used to isolate victims and keep them insecure so they won't leave.*
_It could also be a verbal diversionary tactic to redirect focus onto somebody else, deflecting negative attention away from the narcissist while keeping that person spinning in circles. The narcissistic aim would be to wear someone down while using them as a human lightning rod during the discussion._
*It can also be a public shaming tactic, especially when calmy spoken using polite language, hoping to make it appear that the person they're with is the strange and irrational one (and making the narcissist appear to be the level headed one). Narcissistic forms of psychological sabotage are fairly common during major holidays and special events ... it tends to be the people who always seem to have a big fight right before arriving.*
_Communal narcissists may also pick their victims based on how easily they can "push their buttons" in public -- i.e. eliciting strong negative mental states using emotional manipulation tactics. Narcissists may do this to cultivate frustrated confusion in their victims by making them jump through hoops which never yield successful communication or understanding._
_The objective here is to make a victim look like they're the bad guy_
_--- that way, the narcissist can complain about their victim to others and speak poorly about them behind their back. This can produce a double effect of enabling the narcissist to then form "flying monkeys" and use them against their victims; because when outsiders witness a strong reaction from victims of narcissistic abuse, it may seem that they're be overreacting to the narcissist._
*It may appear to others that a victim is the abuser & the abuser is a victim.*
etc. etc. etc.
(I'm trying my best to keep it short here 😄)
@NeonCicada thank you for all of that. I wish there was a way to share other people's comments ❤
My mom would look them straight in the eye, smile and say "I don't need to explain myself to you."😊
OUTSTANDING!
I took Notes down on Paper! This is the Worst behavior of a very sick mind. My Narc was a NAVY COMMANDER. I held our family together for 25 years, always hoping and believing we could make it NOT to tear our children up in divorce court. I turned a blind eye many times.
This is ACCURATE. Torturous in the end….. However.,,YEAH IM STRONG, IM SMART, I found my voice… and said, “ You are Not more superior than me! You are Not more intelligent than me, You Cannot control me, And I can stand on my own 2 feet w: LOVE in my heart for family and friends!
Praise the Lord for His fighting for me in Court!!!
Interesting timing.
Funny handle
Thank you, Darren.
This cleared things up for me at a much needed time.
💚
Very accurate, Darren. Certain types of people will use emotional language to try to control others. Politicians do it all the time.
Excellent video! I would love for you to do a video on how to manage false accusations. It's becoming so common these days. Therefore, it's important to have strategies for when it happens. I've experienced being falsely accused of many things, and it's a painful experience.
The lady above who said never to give a fear-based response is right. Remember that many people have quite good judgement and will either dismiss the nonsense or at the very least not go all in with the fabrications. Of course, if you can avoid the liar and their flying monkeys, do. If a third party starts being weird with you, ask if everything is ok. They'll probably say it is, but if it's appropriate, make an offer that they can always get in touch if they'd like a chat. You may actually be projecting, and they may have worries if their own and don't know about any accusations, anyway. If someone calls you on what they've been told you did, perhaps try 'I don't know why anyone would say something like that because it's really horrible and not true, but thank you for letting me know that someone's being mean behind my back; I appreciate your honesty'. Keep an even keel and a gentle hand on the emotional tiller.
My vulnerable narcissist husband accused me of having an incestuous relationship with my autistic son. The truly striking thing about that accusation was that he only made it to my 11 year old granddaughter. He didn’t accuse me before any adults who would have been able to stop such a vile thing from happening. My granddaughter was able to see through him and actually recorded him saying those vile things and sent the recording to me. I knew he was capable of making false accusations but I was still just devastated at the level he was willing to sink to who he was willing to take down with him. He was a “minister” by the way.
Wow…they never cease to surprise you with the made up narratives in their own head. Have to wonder if it was projection of what he wanted to do….? They usually accuse of the same things they did or wanted to do. Just my thoughts…
I would like to hear any strategies you have to deal with this! Thank you!
Go totally gray rock plz
Focus and work on yourself. It's the only way of control. As above go boring and keep your business to yourself. They're often gathering info on you.
I got rid of social media for this exact readon
All of this sounds so *current*
Yeah no shit!
@@createone100 Years from now, psychology lecturers will have abundant video material to illustrate "issues".
A family member has to face her narc in court. He’s a master manipulator, gaslighter and has accused her of the violence he inflicts. Mr. Magee, do you have any resources to present in court? This dangerous narc has the whole law enforcement fooled, my relative desperately needs help.
Please and thank you.
Don't worry, they always reveal themselves.
I notice that my daughter uses this technique on me any time I Ask her to change her behavior or do her chores or other tasks.
I tell her the behavior that needs to be canged and why. Then she starts listing several things that she feels I do that are inappropriate. Typically untrue or twisting the truth. She feals like with her attack she has won and therefore she can continue her bad behavior, simply because she is good at shit talking. I stand firm and insist that she behaves appropriately, but she reverts back to her previous behavior in a day or two when she thinks I am not paying attention.
I think it is a mistake for me to listen to her attack my behavior and justify myself when I am trying to correct her continued misbehavior.
After listening to this video and thinking about the technique my daughter is using to justify her bad behavior and intimate me. In the future I am not going to give her the opportunity to twist the conversation. It is not appropriate for anyone to verbaly atack someone for doing the responsible thing in guiding their children to behave and do their chores.
Extremely accurate 👍
Thank you for your work, Darren, and YES, Please. It will be beneficial to learn some strategies for managing narc behaviour and false accusations at the workplace, as this is not covered on the internet very much but is very common.THX
Thank you for the clarity. I wish i had encountered it about 15 years ago...
These kinds of coercive accusations were exactly what I experienced in my covertly narcissistic abusive relationship. They happened after I ended the relationship but also occurred during it, with attempts to control my clothing, hair (asking me "lovingly" to keep my hair long because he liked that on women), and social media usage-all of which I rejected as I continued doing my own thing, thinking he was simply insecure and needed time to feel secure in the relationship. When it happened after the relationship, I initially perceived it as "romantic insecurity" or "being very hurt," but it was just more emotional, mental, and psychological abuse piled on with vague, exaggerated and projective things.
+1 for a vid on responding to weaponized accusations.
How do they know how to do this? All these textbook behaviours, it's strange how they do this and understand how to manipulate... Or even want to. I know it's a shame based disorder but I don't understand why they don't just sit in a hole and leave everyone alone.
Their brain feels like it has to do these things in order to protect them. They only feel good about themselves when they feel like they're better than others. If they just left others alone.. it would expose them to themselves.. and it would leave them in a state of worthlessness and hopelessness. A narcissist that doesn't feed off of others quickly goes from "I'm the best" to "I'm worthless."
I truly believe it is a dark force within. They sold out to that force and gave into all the evil practices to destroy everyone because they were destroyed. They need to repent and turn from these ways. Then they could be free from the darkness within. In my humble opinion..
@@ChrisGagnerthey hate to be left to their own thoughts. Or be left all alone they will completely self destruct with their shame.
my father is a Sadistic Psychopath!!!
i have spent my whole adult life studying healing practices and therapies and focusing on forgiveness
yet now i see my efforts to give love and my sincere care was wasted on a cruel sick man too stubborn to heal himself
I bet your studying made you a better person in ways that are hard to notice yourself.
Exactly! Sadly, how just an accusation or suggestion can produce a stain.
The goal of a narcissist is to protect their image, which almost always requires sacrificing relationships.
Amazing!
Thank you.
interested in learning strategies.. Yes Please! TY for sharing knowledge and guidance
Im still shaking from the long term repercussions of offending the sickos. 😢
🤗💖
Comment for the algorithm.
Thanksl yiu Darren.
Excellent!
How to defend yourself from accusations would be nice because they love it and the wilder the accusations are the easier people tend to believe them. Besides, the victim is always outnumbered.
Could you speak a little more on how the narcissists accuse and punish their children? How far they will go to punish their children, for something they had never done.
"The process is the punishment" is an already-established phrase, but it's not a great phrase. "Punishment" implies the victim is bad, did something bad, or otherwise deserves what is being done to them. "The process is the abuse" would be a better phrase
Absolutely!
Agreed. I also feel this way about the term 'Reactive Abuse' because most of that is the victim trying to defend themselves from the actual abuse directed at them from their bully abuser. I feel like that term should be changed to 'Reactive Defense' but I guess these terms are pretty much set now, sadly.
@@CarolinaCarolina-ph9mxreactive defense is a much better term!
@@louhortonsculpture Yes, thank you! Now to figure out how to get the label changed, other than just using the term that way until it might catch on, which could take a century or two. When someone is saying something mean to us or doing something mean to us - THEM being abusive - for us to say or do anything in response then becoming labeled 'abuse' is flat out wrong, and a way to render us mute. It's a Reactive Defense, or even Reactive Response, NOT Reactive Abuse. I do believe, however, that if taken to extremes, then yes, there can be cases of actual Reactive Abuse, but most of us are going no further than trying to respond defensively and correct wrongful things said or done to us. The way things are labeled right now, it makes us afraid to even utter a peep in defense without getting a nasty label stuck on us - which is just the way bullies like it.
Yup, I know people like that.
I take care of a narc's dying mother. He messes up her food and pills and then accuses me of screwing up. I'm so done with this shit, I almost just left the other day. and he then tells on himself by making little comments like "...driving me crazy..." Yeah, he's trying to drive me crazy, but I know what he is. Pity his fiance, unless maybe she is a bigger narc than he is and will get a taste of his own medicine.
Prayers for you Daphne I hope you can get away from him. They are evil to the core they never see it or change. They will always blame you for their F ups!!! Ew I can’t stand narcs. I got rid of mine 3.75 years ago best decision I ever made !
Perhaps the core metaphysics of it the transition is the transition
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I lived in a small town where I was accused of being a slut. This was done on purpose to encourage the local sex pests to assault me. I had to move after I heard a stranger outside testing my door locks to my house in the middle of the night.
☝️☝️☝️
Do you think that killing one twin in the womb with a medical procedure for down syndrome then the stillbirth of that tiwn later with the live twin and the post natal hormones can cause so much grief, guilt and trauma to make a woman into a narcissist?
There are no superior people. There are people who have tact, use honesty, class, focus on themselves, and handle beefing with others in secret.
This is superior behavior or behavior that does not create conflict. Challenges are choices for people. Challenging behavior is antagonistic in nature.
There are plenty of superior here in America who do not start mess, are not insensitive, and who do not have pesky behavior like challenging others.
Obvious portrait of trump.
Its always interesting to read comments from people who accuse others of being narcissistic when they them selves are most likely the narcissistic or are also a narcissist. Amd then there's the enablers and people who are clearly part of the problem. They never hold them selves accountable and everything is alwats someone elses fault and they've never done any wrong. The comments under these videos are full of these people
Obviously you’re a narc
Blah, blah, says you
@caroleminke6116 what an irresponsible, childish, petty reply. If there's a narcissist it's you
Nice video, I'm still struggling with the end of my 7-year relationship. My significant other, who I considered to be the love of my life, left me a month ago, and I can't seem to shake the constant thoughts of him. Despite my efforts to bring him back into my life, nothing has worked, and I feel frustrated and hopeless. I've tried to move on, but my heart still longs for him, and I don't see myself with anyone else. I apologize for sharing this here, but I just can't seem to stop missing him.
It's hard to let go of someone you love; I went through a similar experience when my 12-year relationship ended. I tried everything to get him back, and eventually I had to turn to a spiritual counselor for assistance.
Interesting! How did you locate a spiritual counsellor, and how can I get in touch with him most effectively?
His name is Father Obah Eze, and he is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.
he is father obah eze, he has great powers, he can help you.
Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked him up now online. impressive
Wow I just looked Father Obah Eze on the net he’s very legit thanks once again ❤
You are swallowing tge last word of your sentences so we cant hear them
I can hear everything he says just fine, and I've watched at least 50 of his videos, and I'm 71. Maybe you're having a hearing problem
I’m hearing and understanding him.