Yes. That was a big red flag. Bonnie is a user in all senses of the word. She used drugs and alcohol. She used other people. She used other people's money. She let herself be used by other people, then abandoned. It is leitmotif in Bonnie's life.
Many of the situations have a long “ context “ or “ back story “ Geez…. Some of them take a decade to get to the point. I just fast forward and find it myself
OP sees his sister use her boyfriend as a wallet, never realizing that she, himself, is her current wallet. The sister never gave a shit about OP and never felt gratitude for the fact that she was always there for her and paid for everything. To her, OP was simply the wallet for now until she could score a bigger one.
Sending her money after she said to stay out of her business. I would assume that means to stop sending money. If you can't straighten up after a brush with the law, then you don't need help financially. If you can't be responsible then don't ask for help. Tough love.
Marrying a person you don't really love for money is much more common than we would like to think. This should be a warning to a single person coming from wealth. It's probably smart to start dating people without telling about your wealth early in the relationship. Then you have a bigger chance the other person will start loving you for who you are and not just loving your money.
Mom never had to be taken advantage of and rescuing her many times. So mom wasn't feeling her disgust with their financial situation. But when sis asked too much of them, it's a breaking point. So mom needs to back off. After she took sister in and paid for everything so she could save..so she is a user!!! Look into that!
NTA. They say there's truth in the bottom of a bottle. Bonnie should have planned better and not tried to lie her way into marriage. If she hadn't been found out now, she would have been found out in less than a year, as she's not as smart as she thinks. Her fault not yours
I agree. Bonnie has done stupid thing after stupid thing. She would have been found out to be a liar soon. I am surprised she managed to keep the relationship going as long as she did.
As much as family want to give better opportunities to their loved ones sometimes money is not always the answer. Sometimes it's better for children to earn their way as it teaches responsibility and self reliance. I'm not against helping anyone in a time of need (family or not), but be wary about creating a dependency, an entitlement, without something that lets you know they are sincerely grateful for your help with their words and future behaviour. Bonnie has a great deal to learn about the importance of trust, honesty and hard work. Actions do speak louder than words.. as it's been said so many times before.
The amount of enabling Bonnie's bad behavior and wrong doings by OP and her mom, is colossal. How many times will they keep saving her a$$ from criminal activities, immoral practices, and unhealthy lifestyle. They both should have let her fend for herself, and there is no excuse acceptable, for them to keep saving her spoiled entitled brat a$$.
bonnie wasted herself in party and drugs and still you are giving her money show you are enabling her way and attitude.... and now after everything, your mother also gives her house to stay is also a way to enable her behaviour....if you want to teach bonnie a lesson than stop supporting her in any way..than she will know how life is difficult
Why do the "friends" Bonnie hangs out with at college always disappear and leave Bonnie behind? That is not a good sign. There is something about Bonnie that is wrong with her. I doubt she is studying. Bonnie needs a "keeper" to keep her out of trouble. She is screwing up her life. Hanging out with the wrong crowd.
I am not lying. And you are too embarrassed by your family, I wouldn't do any favors for her. She's embarrassed by her family, but uses her family then Matt. Wow! I would kick her out. I would be done.
If it took this specific situation to finally cause the OP to grow some balls (metaphorically speaking) then what would have happened had this specific situation not happened? I consider the OP to be a villain herself for allowing this giant lie and endangering the groom by allowing him to marry a terrible person without proper warning. Her "warning" was just revenge. She never really cared about him.
The worst villain in this story is not even the OP's sister. It is "Matt". The fact that he would want to marry such a terrible person by extension makes HIM a terrible person. If he had any decency he would not have wanted anything at all to do with her much less marriage.
@@ianesgrecia8568 YES. He proved that he is NOT socially astute and NOT wise because he either ignored or shrugged off every red flag and social cue that a wiser person would have picked up on. To me that makes him a very flawed person.
The instant she referred to Matt as her ticket, i would have been done.
Yes. That was a big red flag. Bonnie is a user in all senses of the word. She used drugs and alcohol. She used other people. She used other people's money. She let herself be used by other people, then abandoned. It is leitmotif in Bonnie's life.
No way that Matt’s parents would have allowed this union w/o prenup. They came from old money, so you’d think this would have been a formality.
Many of the situations have a long “ context “ or “ back story “
Geez…. Some of them take a decade to get to the point. I just fast forward and find it myself
I run at 1.5 normal speed. 😊
OP sees his sister use her boyfriend as a wallet, never realizing that she, himself, is her current wallet. The sister never gave a shit about OP and never felt gratitude for the fact that she was always there for her and paid for everything. To her, OP was simply the wallet for now until she could score a bigger one.
No one likes to be supporting someone who is ungrateful and just using them.
Sending her money after she said to stay out of her business. I would assume that means to stop sending money. If you can't straighten up after a brush with the law, then you don't need help financially. If you can't be responsible then don't ask for help. Tough love.
Marrying a person you don't really love for money is much more common than we would like to think.
This should be a warning to a single person coming from wealth. It's probably smart to start dating people without telling about your wealth early in the relationship. Then you have a bigger chance the other person will start loving you for who you are and not just loving your money.
The first divorce I heard of was a couple I babysat for. The wife left her husband for a very wealthy man.
Oh hell no!!! I would tell her to stop being so damn selfish!!
This is op and her moms fault for spoiling this entitled monster
Mom never had to be taken advantage of and rescuing her many times. So mom wasn't feeling her disgust with their financial situation. But when sis asked too much of them, it's a breaking point. So mom needs to back off. After she took sister in and paid for everything so she could save..so she is a user!!! Look into that!
9:32 if she can handle herself, she wouldn’t need you to pick her up. Leave her there and go home
NTA. They say there's truth in the bottom of a bottle. Bonnie should have planned better and not tried to lie her way into marriage. If she hadn't been found out now, she would have been found out in less than a year, as she's not as smart as she thinks. Her fault not yours
I agree. Bonnie has done stupid thing after stupid thing. She would have been found out to be a liar soon. I am surprised she managed to keep the relationship going as long as she did.
Bonnie was worried about looking poor
She works in a coffee shop !!!
As much as family want to give better opportunities to their loved ones sometimes money is not always the answer. Sometimes it's better for children to earn their way as it teaches responsibility and self reliance. I'm not against helping anyone in a time of need (family or not), but be wary about creating a dependency, an entitlement, without something that lets you know they are sincerely grateful for your help with their words and future behaviour. Bonnie has a great deal to learn about the importance of trust, honesty and hard work. Actions do speak louder than words.. as it's been said so many times before.
The amount of enabling Bonnie's bad behavior and wrong doings by OP and her mom, is colossal. How many times will they keep saving her a$$ from criminal activities, immoral practices, and unhealthy lifestyle. They both should have let her fend for herself, and there is no excuse acceptable, for them to keep saving her spoiled entitled brat a$$.
bonnie wasted herself in party and drugs and still you are giving her money show you are enabling her way and attitude.... and now after everything, your mother also gives her house to stay is also a way to enable her behaviour....if you want to teach bonnie a lesson than stop supporting her in any way..than she will know how life is difficult
The straw that broke the camel's back
I have done enough for you!!! You treat me like dirt, I am done!!!
rehab does not have much success unless the motivation comes from the addict. and OP was not smart moving this girl in with her
glad I was not brought up with worshiping 'sacred family', I'd just roll over and go back to sleep
Why do the "friends" Bonnie hangs out with at college always disappear and leave Bonnie behind? That is not a good sign. There is something about Bonnie that is wrong with her. I doubt she is studying. Bonnie needs a "keeper" to keep her out of trouble. She is screwing up her life. Hanging out with the wrong crowd.
I am not lying. And you are too embarrassed by your family, I wouldn't do any favors for her. She's embarrassed by her family, but uses her family then Matt. Wow! I would kick her out. I would be done.
If it took this specific situation to finally cause the OP to grow some balls (metaphorically speaking) then what would have happened had this specific situation not happened? I consider the OP to be a villain herself for allowing this giant lie and endangering the groom by allowing him to marry a terrible person without proper warning. Her "warning" was just revenge. She never really cared about him.
I think if Bonnie had been honest from the get go she still would be married.
Matt hadn't noticed that she was a waitress at her job???
Op sister could have stayed married if she would’ve just kept her mouth shut and not bully op and op needs to go no contact with her family
This story was bothered frustrating on many different levels, the biggest being how long the content went, and I kept screaming. GET TO THE POINT!
The worst villain in this story is not even the OP's sister. It is "Matt". The fact that he would want to marry such a terrible person by extension makes HIM a terrible person. If he had any decency he would not have wanted anything at all to do with her much less marriage.
Wow... talk about mysandry. Yes. The worst is the guy that was lied to the whole relationship! 100%
@@ianesgrecia8568 YES. He proved that he is NOT socially astute and NOT wise because he either ignored or shrugged off every red flag and social cue that a wiser person would have picked up on. To me that makes him a very flawed person.
First comment 😊